#183: Fanboy, Bulls & Balls

for the first time. Just use code Brooklyn downloaded from your phone's app store or go to Slice life dot com. There's two boys in this South for Glin Boys in this South. Crazy boys in this South, Boys in this South. There's two boys in this South, blin boys in this Souse. Crazy boys in this South, Boys in this South. Yeah, I still don't know about that one man. Why that's episode the Brooklyn Boys podcast, I don't know. I feel like it needs more. It's just this repetitive crazy boys

in this house. I wrote a note to myself. I wrote that to do the second part. There's more of the rap, right, and I haven't done it. I did like, and then I forgot about it, and now the song, the real song whop is pretty much over. Yeah, that's also why, just like I kind of like that as like a as a as a different way to start the show. Every once in a while, I'll write I'll write some new ones. We've gotten requests for people to for us to start the show with the the Beastie Boys.

Even then when we end the show with when we end the show, they're like, why do you always end the show with that? But you don't start the show with that? And I'm like, I don't know, because that's always been the ender because it's a slow, big like up, you know, I don't know. I guess we could, you know why, because we can't end the show at start up start up, right, We can't unless unless finished finished. I couldn't do that. Yeah. Man, we're delivering a pod

cast a day early today. Yeah, so this is Tuesday because I have something. This is my turn every week. Every week, Scary says, you know that's something I gonna do. I do something. Yea. So this week I said, you know what, I actually have to do something on a Wednesday. On a Wednesday, So are you doing in this podcast on a Tuesday. You know, it's a good thing that wasn't on a Monday yesterday. I don't know. I had an extension of the weekend. You know, my friends got

alive alive on this weekend. So well, I forget about the weekend I had. I had a Monday Funday Monday. I never have Funday mondays. I never saw you in a convertible with two two guys driving and you were in the back to dude, I wanted to say, I didn't want to say, would define I looked and I went, dude, those but my friends are eating those T shirts the whole thing. My friends are either retired, they work in like service industry, or they have jobs they can't talk

about exactly. So you're not good in the back seat scary, You're the worst guy to sitting at the turn. Back seat driver is actually you. I think it was created for me. You have always a better way to go, a short cut, and at some point in the road you'll say to the driver, I can't believe you're going this way. Dude, you should you should? You should blank, you should go this way? Do? How? Why? Why would

you go? No? Then you get belligerent when the person doesn't want to change the road, like no, I'm gonna take them and take the turn pike. No, no, you can't take the right. Well, we were going on a Monday from two to six. Yeah, and then you get so upset like it's the end of the world. These guys wanted to go on the Parkway and I wanted to go. Dus gotta go to the Palasades Parkway. But my friend, you know, he does what I used to do. He's got a convertible BMW and he insisted, he insisted

on putting the top down. But it's seven degrees out. What the funk, dude, I'm the convertible. Time to put the top down. The window is somewhere between sixty five to like eighty degrees. What don't you go over in me? And by the way, I had no sun block on, and you go. It's just it's just uncomfortable. Maybe four at one point yesterday, I know. And and he's but he's like, you know what, I got a new car. It's a new convertible. I gotta show off. And I'm thinking,

like we haven't heard that before. So here I was the schmuck in the back seat. But yeah, watching your life in front of you. Yeah, So my friend decides to have a pig roast and pool party on a Monday, Monday when when when it's service, it's service industry day. It's when strippers and clippers usually visit. You know. We talked about this on the podcast earlier, right on another one episode What could have been? Could have you know?

We did? We talked about the clippers you mean hair cut places, yes, right, and and and in the summer, and teachers to the mix. So teachers, strippers, and and hair clippers. Clippers are whoever has off on Monday. And these dudes who are retired and have jobs you can't talk about or whatever it is, they're they're in business for themselves, you know. So I'm the only idiot that had work that morning at four in the morning and then had worked the next morning. So you partied all weekend?

What were you doing? What was so important on Monday? You had to go out? It was you know what it was? There was a fucking pool for me to swim in. Brody, Uh, all I heard was the word pool. I didn't care about the pig roast. I didn't care about cigars had a hand rolled cigar guy there they had you know, it was this was a man. There's like thirty what what places this that's my friend's house. He decided to have a pig roast, a pig roast

pool party on a Monday at his house. And you know, I love the guy because he had he had a huge spaces, you know, backyard and they hit a pig roast. I need a pig roast, right. They did the pig. They had the whole thing. I haven't actually took footage, which I didn't post on social media. It was gonna yeah, yeah, the pig. You know, they had the pig with the curl the ear and it was like, you know, it was all like whatever. And then the ear, the ear gets all crispy and curly when you when you cook

the pig. They cook a whole pig. Yeah, I understand. And then the pulled pork though so good, I gotta say, though, I can't you sit you watch the pig, the pig with the head on and the claws coming out. They actually put it at the edge of the pan and then they put the the actual pulled pork and the rest of the pan would you eat that. Oh yeah, so it looks like the the pig swallow a grenade. Yes, um,

you know what. No, I would say normally I would not, but you and I went to a wedding where that happened, and I went to a luau in Hawaii where that happened, and so I've done it. But listen, it's like the fish head. And then the fit like, don't serve me the fish head, and don't serve me the shrimp head. Oh no, the shrimp heads the worst. I think the shrimp head tops the big head because the pig head, you're like, oh, that looks like, um, the cartoon is

something the shrip head doesn't. It's like like an alien and it's awful and it looks like a bug. No, I'll look at a pighead now if if here's what I wouldn't want to see, if the pig head was uncooked right, And by the way, I want to stop here for a second. I apologize to everyone who's squeamish or vegetarian or like animal rights and everything. I you know, I'm I'm I understand, So I'm what I'm saying is moving forward a little bit. If the pig head was uncooked.

I could not eat the rest of the like barbecue, like if it's all cooked, it doesn't look real right. It looks kind of glaze and it looks like this, like, oh, that's like a sugarcoated It's like it's like a fondant pighead. I could I could do without it altogether. I mean, I don't need to see it with there's no purpose. It's just decorative at that point, and I don't need to make the association, Oh, this meat came from this head. I don't want to just take remove it all together.

The same thing we had this conversation about the fish head as well. Don't need to see it. Show it to me. Piladed and butterflied, all ready to go, that's what I like. Well, how about this? This is where it gets worse for me. So I don't want to keep talking about them by name. But there's a there's an afternoon show in New York. I listened to right sports guys. I've mentioned them, um and what they're doing is one of the guys has a friend who raises cattle, okay,

and he's invited them. He's that they can buy an entire cow like but prepared for meal, right, like you know, like you buy a lobster, Like you buy a two pound lobster and they give it two pounds of meat or whatever it is. Obviously it's not two pounds of meat, but you don't see the lobster like, oh, a whole lobster.

But they take care of it for you. Yeah. So so the one guy who's got the friends says yeah, and then they're gonna have um, they're gonna have a draft, a lottery like um, not a draft, lottery, um draft. So like one guy's gonna go, I want to filets. The other guy's gonna go, I want give me the the flank and the filet and I'll take the t bawn like they're gonna they're gonna alternate what parts they want, right, I can almost handle that. So far, So good for you,

so far. I'm in like if you and I were like bidding on, like, oh, I'll take three and I'll trade you to to rib sections for whatever, okay, right, okay, So he springs it on him this week, like you know, when you go to the lobster tank and you pick out the lobster. He so he the guy who has. The friend says to the other guy, we're gonna go pick out the cow that we want. No, right, right, that's what lost me. They can't do that, right, even though you know by going to pick up a whole cow,

something's gonna happen. You can't pick it out. No, right, But wait a second, but why can't we pick our own lobster But we can't pick our own cow. Well, that's what I'm saying, right, So you pick out I don't see. I don't pick out a lobster. I don't do it. No, I'll just order. I'll look at the menu, I'll go. I'll go. You know, one point to five pounds twin tales on sale. Okay, great, I'll take that. So you never want to see it from beginning to if if I'm if I see a lobster tank in

the lobby, I'm not ordering lobster. They used to be a place called Larrison's Turkey Farm in Chester. My god, that was the best place ever had real turkeys there, but back in the day, and and and then in later years they we just have them there just for show so kids can see a place sold it. And then they reopened it differently but originally regally so so Larrison's Turkey Farm, which to me was my it was my was where I went for my birthday for years,

and it was so his family style. Do you remember his family style? Yeah, yeah, I do not, Okay. It was an old farmhouse and family style meaning that you said it very very long picnic tables, like thirty long picnic tables, and you just ate with other people. I don't remember the communal thing it was right there. So like remember Lundy's in Brooklyn. Yes, it was the same

way back in the day. So you would sit and so they would bring you turkey that was unbelievably fresh because they had a turkey farm and some farm wink wink, and they would bring out scary They would bring out bowls of stuffing like giant like for five six people, and and like you would you would share it with the other people at the table, like just massive bowls of food and it was all you could eat. So

you would wheel people out of there. What I didn't know, and my parents didn't tell me until I was old enough, was that some people, not my parents, some people would go out back and pick out that turkey. Oh no, now he Here's the thing, though, you could you had to pick out your turkey because it takes a long time to cook. So people would would would sometimes an advance pick out the turkey. I we didn't do that because we would just go there. We live in New

Jersey at the time, so it's crazy to think. So you wouldn't pick up see the lobsters where I draw the line. I could pick up the lobster. Okay, that's my line, but I would never pick out my turkey. Wouldn't certainly would put a pick out a cow, like, how do you do that? Go that one looks fat? Like if you're getting one, if you're getting one cow, right, Let's say it's a flat rate. Let's say it's like a thousand dollars for the cow. Whatever the prices, I'm

making it up. You you're gonna look for the biggest cow. Right, you know that some cow going should I should exercise this week? God damn it. Right, you're not gonna get the scrolling when it looks like he's been he's like doing sit ups. So this so the cow cow right, These cows, these cows will right. So so you don't want you don't want to be a fat turkey or a fat cow. And the lobster, well, you know the same thing, right, You don't want the biggest lobster in

the tank. No, I look, I told you the story like lobsters. I brought the pot home and didn't realize they were alive in the pot. Yes, I tell you know, there was a pre made dinner. I'm like, no, well, they start rotting the second that you killed them, So if it was dead on arrival, then it would have been probably you can freeze it. The meat goes bad

quick though, when it's fresh. Yeah. You know what now, I keep thinking that the lobsters eating my potatoes, yeah, you know, like they were potatoes and clams in there, And how do I know the pot that he wasn't nibbling up my potatoes? And I don't know what he eats, doesn't eat, I don't care, don't tweat me. And I'm like, oh, you know, I don't know any potatoes. I like to think they were nibbling in my potatoes. So look, I know there's people that shoot, what you know, they hunt.

I get that that's something in you that you're able to do that. I'm not judging. I'm saying for me and scary. We could not pick out our cow, can't I know, I know, someone pick out the deer. They want I eat deer as it is. Let alone, someone picking me out deer, you know, but I certainly don't want my food looking at me. It ruined. It ruined a little bit of the the the pig roast and part. But you didn't see the pig alive. No, no, no,

the pig in the roof. But it was still. It was still there, and it was like it's carcass was like attached. It was like right there. It's like, hey, hey, look this is but I'm not gonna Your people eat the fish heads. They eat the eyes, eat everything. Yeah. Well well um some people were like they were like, you know, save me the head because I wanted. They want the cheek meat. Cheek meat comes. Sorry, there's so much damn meat in a freaking pig. Some people have

to go for the cheek meat. What tastes. My aunt used to want the turkey butt. She used to like that part in the back you don't eat she that was our favorite because I guess it's fat and soft or whatever, and what if it just took a dump and then they killed it and then that's the end of it. Then you're not eating the intestines and stuff. It was just the cheeks, like the cheeks all right. So yeah, so yeah, so I was invited to that pool. That's why I went on a Monday all right? Did I? Uh?

Did I? Speaking of like what you eat? Did I ever tell the bulls balls joke on this podcast? Okay? So this guy goes to Mexico and he's going out for dinner with with with a friend and he friend says, we're gonna go to this place. They have a specialty. You gotta try it, all right. So they go to the restaurant and he says, uh, just order the special. He's like, he says, give me the special for me and my friend. And he gets, uh this plate with two large round objects covered in in gravy and he

says he's just to the waiter what is this? And the waiter says it's bulls balls. And he says what he says, trust me the delicious. You love him the bulls balls. So he says, all right, so he eats the bulls ball loves them. They go back every day that week while we're in Mexico to that same restaurant and they get bulls balls. So the last day before they fly home, he says to his friend, like, we gotta go back the bulls balls. We're gonna go back.

This is great, what a delicacy. It's fantastic. So they go to the restaurant. He says, bring me this ushal and on the plate is two little balls engravy and he says, excuse me, Uh, sir, what happened to the bulls balls? And uh the way it looks at he goes senor sometimes the bull wins, But I actually had the shot ready for you. You should have. Yeah, that's what it was. My fit when my favorite jokes as a cabin telling that jokes is a kid, it's great.

That's actually a great joke. We should tell it on the air. No to Uncle Johnny and then lit Uncle Johnny tell it enough jokes for him. No, he has a style that's not his not his style. No, Elvis likes when he's quick, short, like what do you call a blank blank? But a blank blank, a blank blank, that's what he likes. Uncle Johnny loses it in the middle of a joke. If you get him a long joke.

He go, he went to the he's he's in Mexico, and he says, give me up, and sometimes the ball bulls balls wins and then yeah, something we'll be lost in translation, you know. And then he says, but it's got gravy on it, and you know, and you know you can't. Did you have a nice By the way, did you have a good weekend? What I do this weekend? Oh? Um? I know you got into some customer service fights I had.

I had a lot of issues I had so uh. Yes, So I had a major problem with Friday's on Friday, and I had a big problem with HP you'r Hewlett Packard. Today I want to talk about both of them. And then I also want to talk about speaking of speaking of of, and I'll get to both of those, uh, at least one of them. But as speaking of testicles, because we were talking about testicles, I wanted to talk

to you about a pizza experience I had. Um, it was a couple of weeks ago, but I didn't get to tell you about it, And and so the reason that I'm calling it testicles is that I want to refer to the pizza place as testicle pizza. Okay, can I can I do that? Yeah? I told you. Every town has a Facebook page and you can put in the Facebook page for your town, Hey, I need a plumber, and then everyone will recommend like who the good plumbers are.

And then sometimes you'll say someone go, hey, I'm looking for a good Indian restaurant, and people will put in, you know, a good Indian restaurant, and so um, I look sometimes for pizza recommendations, right, and so there's one place for I'd say for i'd about three years now. They opened up about five years ago, but and I've never been there. It's in a it's in a strip mall. About three years ago I start seeing that one out

of three recommendations is for this place. I'm going to refer to it as Testicle Pizza because I don't want to say the real name, okay, And they say, oh my god, it's fantastic. Oh it's the best pizza. Oh my god, it's perfect. It's it reminds me of when I was growing I. Oh, it's New York pizza. Okay. So a couple of years ago, yeah, maybe three years ago, I went in. I'm like, oh, this pizza. Now by the way. It's not testical pizza, but it's a terrible

name for pizza place. It's one of those like Stacy's Pizza. Oh no, come on, Stacy's Stacy's works. No, it doesn't. Stacy's not Italian. This place has a name like it belongs in a subway station, like in the in the like a train station, right, what has like pizza like buried. It's it's not train related. It's just it's just not a good pizza place name anyway. So I walk in, and you know some places have the pizza is already made and it's in the glass case, right, But sometimes

it's there and it looks relatively fresh, like they rotate them. Yeah, and then sometimes they sometimes they just throw extra sauce over it every hour or two or right, we put extra if you order it to throw extra cheese on top. Right right, they'll take like the old right. Look. If you order, let's say you want sausage of pepperoni, they'll find it old pepperoni slice and throw some sausage on it and throw out the oven. You're like, why is

the pepperoni burnt? But the sausage isn't. That's that's pizza. So I go in three years ago and all the pizza in the case is just it's so old, it's curled, it looks like it was from the day before. It looks like it was in the freezer, in a non freezer bag, and it gets that white on it, like it was just terrible. So I walk out and I tell my family, oh, I went to testical pizza, and uh, it just doesn't look right. And my wife says, but everybody speaks so highly of it. No, not doing it.

Not a year and a half ago. A We're a house with some other couples and somebody says, oh, you gotta try testical pizza. Not what Yeah, I get it's oh we have it at the time, me and the world. Obviously they haven't been around right. So it's somebody who like, damn, they should know pizza. There weren't, so you were giving them credit. You actually entrusted them in their opinions. So I went back in. I went back into here and a half ago, and and again the spizza looks it

looks like spizza, and I'm like, I'm not doing it. No, I walked back out. So finally somebody says to me they've redone the menu, and I don't think it's new owners, which it wasn't, but they've got some new They've got a Brooklyn Slice, which is basically lmb's upside down pizza. Right, you gotta try the Brooklyn Slice now it's delicious. And they got this other thing and it's like all kinds of specialty pizzas, which I think they always had. But this person was like, you gotta try. And they got

the lasagna pizza. They always new pizzas. They said, you know what effort, I'm going in, no matter how bad it looks, I'm going in. I'm not gonna look at the pizza in the case. I'm gonna order fresh pie. Uh and and that's it, and a and a sandwich. Okay, I should have trusted myself. I get at home. The

large pie is maybe a medium. It looked like it looked like you you know, like when you call breaks down and you walk seven miles to a gas station and you're in a you're in a state that isn't they're not known for anything, no no names, no names, the Great State. If I'm not mentioning, and you're like, oh, there's a gas station and there's like Tom's Pizza and you walk in you're like, oh my god, I haven't eaten in six years, and you have a slice of

Tom's pizza. That's what tastical pizza was. I should have trusted myself. So so here's my my advice to everyone. I may have given this before. Trust your instincts when it comes to pizza. Don't go to a place with a bad name, and don't go to a place that people aren't experts about pizza recommend So everyone in my town, you don't know shit about pizza. If you still eat this, pizza is terrible. I can't. This is what bothers me so much. People think that they're experts on something when

they shouldn't be giving their opinions. So if somebody asks me where the best I don't know, sword swordfish, I'm gonna say, calvi are you? Caviar is a great example. Is I'm not going to offer my opinion if I've only had caviar one place, or I don't eat caviar often enough to be an officionado, or or you know, to be trusted on the subject. It just and and the people in your town sounds to me. Brodie like

they don't get out of your town. I feel like they're they're just swimming in the same Maybe they've only had the same three or four places and that's the best of the four places. But it isn't even even within a mile. Is this phenomenon that everybody's telling you know? And you know what, in case anyone listening to this can figure out where I'm talking about, and I don't know how you would, I will say this, the people that work at Testical Pizza could not have been nicer.

Could not have been nicer. There was a mistake in the order. The guy gave me a free pizza. He's like, hey, you know what, that's a fault. He give him an extra pie. So so here's the kicker. I got the extra pie, and I'm thinking to myself, now there's two pizzas you don't want. Well, I didn't realize that. So when I'm going on, I'm like, oh, tell the wife. I'm like, hey, we got a free pizza. These guys are so nice. There was a slight mix up in

the order. I ordered to order a lodge. They had a medium, so the guy gave me a medium out of large, Like take it enjoy. Couldn't have been nicer. Got home, I'm like, what are we gonna do with all this pizza? Now? It's terrible. You're scary for the first time. And I think, in my life, stop it. You threw it away, I know because it was it was. It was by the time we got then, it was like nine o'clock and there was nothing to do with it. And we we'd like my kids took some of one

and I took some of the other. Uh, And so it wasn't like we we shared the one. You know, Listen, we've given food away. There's like you can do, like pick up food. Uh, if you have extra food and people in town will say, oh, drop it off in my house, I'll come pick it up. We've done that, we have extra food. But this pizza was so bad. And we'd already picked it both of them, figuring one would be better than the other, because sometimes the lodge

looks better than the medium. It wasn't. So trust touched your instincts. Trust. Trust was the one that will be angry. And you gotta trust and by the way, trust our gut when we tell you that you should order from Slice and give them a try, because you know, we just came off for this conversation. But the truth of the matter is we we thought that Slice was gonna be great. We tried Slice, and now we're not regretting it. In fact, I earned my free pie because I got

eight pizza points. I I got my eight. Every time you order from Slice, boom, next thing you know, you get a pizza point, and now I have eight. I got my that's the eight pieces of the pie. Got my free pie. I unlocked a free pizza. But the best part of it, Brody of as you know, is if they deal with the local pizzeria. We've been trusting this the good ones, the good ones, not the pizzas of the world, not the test, not the test called pizzas of the world. No, uh, listen, I already got

my free pizza. I haven't claimed it yet, but I've earned it. I'm already working on my second pizza because that using using Slice opens up a world of experimentation, of trying new places that pop up anywhere I am. I'll put in the address of where I am, and it will show me the best pizza places wherever I am that I can try new places. I love the pizza map. I love the pizza map. You just open right and then and there's a little little slice. There's a little slice of pie in all these areas of

the neighborhood. And then you start clicking on them. You could see their ratings, you could see what people have said about them. As in place and not not in my town, but where I was recently. It's an Indian pizza fusion place. And they have chicken tica Massala pizza. I am trying that. I mean, they would have known about it if it wasn't for Slice. Absolutely. And of course all these all the little guys, they can't afford

their own app, right, they can't compete as well. So guess what Slice hooks them up by not charging them high fees to be a part of the Slice network. They get a great app. And you know what, while you're watching the Olympics, right, go ahead and order some pizza using Slice, have it delivered. Don't even leave the house. The Olympics is on seven channels or something. You don't want to leave, you want to get up, So just sit there like a lump like like me and the

family and get your slice delivered using the app. Just go up on the app sausage on a half peppering and a half mushrooms if you want whatever, it's great. Slice is great. Tag it up with your Olympics and uh, you know what, present the pizza to a loved one as if it was a medal. And if it's your first time using Slice, congratulations, you're gonna get five dollars off instantly when you use our code Brooklyn. Make sure you use code Brooklyn. And of course you could tell

your friends, your family. You can do it on different phones, open up different accounts and just but make sure you use the word Brooklyn and you get your five dollars off right there. And don't put the pizza around there, act like they do in the Olympics. I was just joking. Just present them the pizza. Don't do the next thing, doast. Okay, So you you said to me that you met somebody famous or or special this weekend, as did I. I met somebody famous as well, but you you're being very

secretive about it. One of them is somebody I observed I observed the famous person, and then the other that we made plans to hang out and we know we actually hung out. Yeah, Okay, so I may I met a famous person that I may have told you I was going somewhere and I put on Instagram, but I didn't put up my picture yet with that person, and I feel like I may have I may have blown it. So but I want to know who you hung out

with first, if that's okay. Well, First, first, the Saturday afternoon, UM, in the pool, I was actually, yes, Brodie, a pool, that's right, I was in a pool three days in a row. O me too. Yeah, I bet still wait for that invite. By the way, several days, I've given you several audio cues in clues that maybe you could lead into you inviting before. By the way, I did

the Sunday double. I thought about you on Sunday. I had a dilemma when I woke up Sunday morning, was that I didn't know if I wanted to do the go in the hot tub and then the pool, which makes the pool feel colder on a hot day, or if I wanted to go uh into the pool and then get in the hot tub that I did the hot tub into the pool. You know I could experience that too, if you would just give me that invite to your pool. Well, a guy who sounds like you

on the radio. I don't know if you listen to the Alice in Morning show went on the air today and said, I like Brody, but I can only take so much of them, so right, So why would I want to overload you with brodiness by having you cut in my house? It's too much. You want to enjoy yourself too much, Brodie. I'm doing you a favor, but not inviting you over. Yeah, you are doing me a favor. Okay, great, you do that. I'm gonna go and hang out in pools with celebrities like I did on the weekend. So

here's the Boys podcast. I'm celebrity. Here's so was. I'm in the I I'm in the pool and and my girlfriend's in the lounge chair and I'm like and she's like, hey, she goes look over there. I'm like what. And there's there's a guy playing with his kid in the pool. And I'm in the pool. But but I'm like with a kid. I'm in the pool and he's in the pool fifteen feet away with his he's playing with his kid. How old is the kid? I don't know, but diapers swimming? Yeah,

and a little older than that. Whatever. So no, so she goes, that's Jason Biggs, Like what and she goes one time at band camp Yeah American pie. Yeah, the one who stuck is dicking an apple pie. Yeah yeah in American pie. Right, So did you said to him? Because I base no, no, no, Robin wanted and sent over a slice of apple pie though, so, so I was like, oh, you can't be that guy's the guy's done very little since then, and leave him alone. You know,

I'll be known for that forever. So he's so listen Jason Biggs local local celebrity by the way, from you have you? Have you? Have you had sex with a pie? Never? Really never? Never? Never? Did? Okay, have you No? So we're to tell you about my boss in the candle up though, right, yes you did. We talked about this on this We talked about that on this podcast. Did it make you curious at all? No? No? Okay, no, okay, trying.

You gotta take care of you. You gotta take business into your all mouth, I mean hands, I mean o. Yeah. So I'm in the pool and I first I didn't believe, but then I saw the nose and I'm like, wait a second, and the side profile and we looked at those. We looked it up. Yeah, we looked it up and sure enough it was definitely him. And I later found out that he was celebrating his parents fiftieth anniversary at the same hotel that we were. So he was in

the pool and I was. I could say I was swimming with Jason Biggs, right, because I was in the pool. You were, you were out and I never approached him, but we were in the pool together. Counts. That counts. That counts. It's all about wording, right. So I was in the pool with him. Yeah, me and him in the pool. So we were well hung out. I was. I was at a pool party with Jason, hung out with him. You know, you hung out and well was pool party Jason Biggs. So he had the family, had

the family there. Yeah. Well, anyway, I didn't want to go up to him. I didn't want to say hi. He probably he actually does know who we are as the kid. The kid is little Biggs, a little bit Little Biggs, Little Biggs maybe so yeah, So so he was there. He is from Hasbrok Hights, New Jersey. He grew up listening to our show. I know that for a fact. So I could have said he listened to the podcast. Is he listening to the podcast right now? Doubtful?

Somebody should tell him. So we're talking about him on our podcast. I mean, we're not the Hasburg Heights boys. No, but we would definitely love to talk to him for a couple of minutes more. Only he would enjoy the podcast. Do you think he would enjoy it? I think he would. A guy would listen. Listen. You know my motto, any guy who bangs an apple pie would love our podcast? Right? That is something else, man. I think there's some I think there's some pie bangers listening slices. You know who

you are. It's okay. So he's not the one that I actually hung out with. So you have to get you have to do a blueberry pipe, get a blue job, A blue job, blue job, the pie blue you the blueberry pie, little boy blue. He needed the money, all right? Yeah? Uh, that's one celebrity. Who else? No? I actually, um, I got drinks with Sammy Sweetheart remember her from the Jersey Shore Wanta What do you even want? Wa? Yeah? That's the celebrity. I guess she's great. Yeah, she's nice. We

we had everybody up on the whole cast. She's awesome. Now she's I mean, she hasn't been part of the show in several years. She didn't, she was not part of the reboot. She's the one that she's She's the the Osborne child that didn't want to come on the show. Here's one Osborne didn't want to be on the She was actually the smart one that said, you know what, I have bigger and betted things to do with my life. Well, she didn't do all. She didn't get arrested go to

jail like some of them. Right. No, No, she's She's a sweet girl from the Jersey. I've been to like her. I thought she was like I hate to say she's a smart one, but I think she was a smart one. I think she was. She she still is. Um. So we went to DJs happy again. She saw well she saw me. No. No, um, Well last week because you're defending her like you want to hang out her again. No, no, no, last week I was defending her because if you were

going to say something disparaging against her. I liked her. She's great, good, I'm glad we're on the same page. And she out with us when we did our events. In um in Miami at the Fountain Blue. We she came to the to that you were there. Absolutely was that the Enrique one? I think? So yeah, No, listen, the whole cast of this Jersey Shore all nice people, so you so. So we were actually there the night that I was posting up from DJ's in elmar in the Happy Hour. She was there that night. I will

say this, It was crowded. You told me, you told me off the podcast, dude, what do you deal with? That was the night we were there. But it was a lot of us. We were all It was like a bunch of us in a corner, like it hang in a corner. There was no corner there. Okay, if you it looked like um, like a like a bee hive, you know when it was like a thousand bees swarming on each other looking for the queen. That's gonna looked like it was what it was, people in each other's shirts.

That's how close they are, jumping up and down with drinks. Look like fun. I'm not ready for that, but it looked like fun. But it looks it looks crazy. It looked crazy. Now I didn't I didn't post up. I didn't post her up. I didn't say hey, it's me, because you know me. I'm like, hey, let's do it. Let's have a little, a little little action here. So social media holder Jason big Shot, that was the other thing I was gonna say. If he was tagged it look at my big Shot nor did. I did not mention.

I did not mention her. I did not mention Jason Biggs. I didn't mention anybody that's weird on social media because I I guess I'm becoming. I don't come on, let's not come on now, come on. So yeah, so so yeah, So you asked me about DJs happy and I'm like, it's a damn good time. It looks it looked like Mayhem, like in a in a good way. If you're into that,

it looks crazy fun. Yeah, but you're not. Uh. I would love to take you out of your comfort zone and bring you to You should have seen Jenkinson's on Saturday Night four thou people there, listen, listen, let me tell you something. I may be ready to party. I may be ready to go next Olympics come around. I don't like scared. Let's go let's go club and let's

go out. Are people listening to this podcast. Um also afraid are of people, because I can't imagine afraid of people, you know, I'm just I'm just undering people I don't want to be around. I'm wondering where people are at this at this phase, because it seems to me like the entire shore of New Jersey and all the bars and clubs and restaurants are just just bustling absolutely and listen, good full of business style. That's fantastic. And I'm right

there in the thick of it. I'm diving in head first. I was trying to come with a catchy slogan for this weekend for to compare me and you. I was like, your Jersey shore, and I'm like, sure, I'm staying on your Jersey board. I'm Jersey. Sure, I'm staying home your Jersey b r e no boar Jersey boar pig Yeah yeah, because then I would have my head landing and the rest of my body beat up. Wasn't you are clubbing and pull side and I was pulled side hot tubbing.

I was hot tubbing. I was tob thumping. Yeah, I know, we just I don't know we both did what made us happy? This is true that no judgments, no judgment. So can I tell my celebrity story as I messed up? You know, we meet a lot of celebrities, were very fortunate get to be a lot of celebrities and when you were not. When we meet celebrities, you know, we're casual. Hey, Kanye, he's it gone, man. You know. Uh, there's a couple of people that come in where I get a little like, uh,

I'm excited to see them. Like, I'll be honest with you, when Taylor Swift comes up, I get a little star struck, even though like we because I was telling my daughter that the first time Taylor Swift came up to our radio station, she was eighteen and if you remember, she had just graduated high school and she won a Grammy for one of the awards, one of the music awards, and on the stage for her acceptance speech, this is I want to say two thou before she became known

for shocked that she won, Taylor Swift, she went on stage she was, I can't believe this. I just graduated high school, right. We played a clip of it on the morning show the next day, well like two days later, she was up at the radio station not on our morning show. She had come up to do an afternoon interview. She still hadn't become a big stary yet. And I saw her and I said, oh, hey, Taylor, and she looked like, oh my god, somebody recognized me. I said, hey,

my name is David Brodie. I worked on the morning show, which want to say. I thought your speech was tremendous. You just graduate high school. Congratulations, good luck with you know, your career such you know. So it was so emotional watching you. And she was like, oh my god, and you ran over and hugged me. Right. And so I've met Taylor Swift, I don't know, seven, eight, ten times,

but there's something about her when she comes up. She's so freaking talented and beautiful and everything that I get a little like, oh my god, Sail Swift. Okay, but normally, you know, I'm casual. You've seen me meet like the Mets after World Series game. Usually you keep your cool. But there's a few people, there's a few types of professions where when I meet them, I get like a fanboy and I tell myself I'm not gonna do it. So, uh, Wednesday night last week, I went to see Seth Meyers

perform at Caroline's Comedy Club. Caroline's on Broadway, the greatest comedy club, greatest. I got to perform there once, legendary, so legendary Seth Meyers gets to play there. I was going to say something else, so okay, I was gonna allude to something that could be coming into the future, so legendary, legendary. There's a chance, a chance. So you're

saying there's a chance. I'm saying there's a chance. The Brooklyn Boys podcast maying part of a major event coming up later in the year which will take place our podcast at Caroline's. But don't hold this to it because it's only a July right now, and the oh, the agents are talking to the amount of people trying to make this, people with cigars in their mouth going less and say, my boys, you're gonna come now, you say, and I'm gonna sign anything until I get I didn't

want to. I wanted to say it, tease it, but okay, we did. We look okay, okay, But anyway, Caroline's Comedy Club, it's where all the biggest names go forever. Okay. So when you go to a common club has sethimises the headline seven o'clock show for me Perfect on a Tuesday. On Wednesday, rather the nachos, I had two orders and nachos. I'm not gonna lie to you. I ordered two orders and nachos. Love the nachos there. So the opening act

is a guy named Jeff Right. Jeff Right is I'm gonna disgrace a very good looking black comedian, so that you know it's the right Jeff Right. In case you're on on Twitter, he's on Seth Meyers as a writer, but he does um short films like sketches, where no one else on the show does. The other writers don't necessarily do prerecorded film sketches like the videos shorts on SNL and the videos he does Jeff Right he does where he plays every character, so it's like he's talking

to himself in the scene. He's brilliant. Go look it up online Late Night with Seth Seth Meyers, Jeff Right and a lot of times in his in his lingo, his slang, he he'll say to the other version of himself, you right, right, like you're right, like Gandhi does on her show, like she says you're right like like you Right, like, you know, you made a good point there. Anyway, he's

the opening act. I didn't know this. Okay, now you know, we know people at Carolines and my my boy Greg uh is there that night and he says, Hey, I'm gonna see if I can get you to meet Seth Myers in the green room after the show. Oh, that'd be fantastic, that'd be that'd be wonderful. Okay, great, So my my buddy Jeff and I go and not Jeff Right, my friend Jeff, and they announced Jeff Rights the opening act. He's the warm up for Seth Myers. He works for

Seth Meyers, and he was fantastic. I'm so excited because now I'm thinking, oh my god, if if he's going to be backstage, I get to meet Jeff Right. Also now again, I you know, I write comedy for a living. It's not on that level. Jeff Right is brilliant, brilliant. He should be on sn L. He's brilliant. Okay, he does a great set. Seth Mars comes out does like an hour. He's fantastic. And I don't normally laugh at I just watch comics. I usually not. I go, that's good.

That's funny. That's good right there. Seth was tremendous. Now I watched Seth Meyers every night. I watched him from twelve thirty to twelve forty five. Roughly. I'd like to see his monologue and his his his rant. He does a rant usually usually like three nights a week of the four shows. So even though I gotta get early in the morning, I stepped late almost every night to watch him. Occasionally fall asleep and I'll watch it the next morning after we do our show. But I love him.

I love him. That's my style, to my sarcasm, that's my energy. Love him. Okay, after the show, I get the wave, come on, let's go. We've got time to meet him. Because they told me we don't know you know he she got the word as soon as as soon as he gives you got so they hustle you in the back, right, and so you go. You go in the back. There's an entrance to the kitchen, and there's a green room. So I go in the green room and sets there and and says, hey has going good.

What's your name? So so now I'm I'm looking at him like like we're two ft or we're two inches apart face to face, and I told my name is David Body. I'm writer for Elvis during the Morning show. He didn't need to know that. He didn't ask. He didn't. He was like, oh, what's your name? Right? So I tell him as if that's gonna mean something to him. I guess I don't know, because like Jimmy Fallon, who's on before him, He's been on our show. He knows

he's right. I've written thank you notes for Jimmy when he came on the show. Elvis has been on his show a couple of times. I set doesn't. I don't think Seth knows Elvis during the Morning show, but I was like, oh, I'm a comedy writer, a big fan, like, oh, we're great. Enjoy the show. Now he's making small talk with me. He's doing a really nice job. He says, did you enjoy the show? Oh my god, that joke right, what you did, the thing with the thing and brilliant.

And my friend Jeff says, the joke you did about the two Jews, Oh my god, Seth, Myer's wife is Jewish, he can make the joke. And and and Jeff and I both Jewish. Loved it, loved the jokes, whatever, and then I'm like, listen, set I step every night and watch you. Thank you for what you do. And at this point I'm creeping up on he gets too much and I'm like the exuberance and I'm like fan boying him. I'm Chris falling him. So then so then to the

left of me, I see Jeff Right and another guy. Okay, so I go so I go, hey, man's it going. He goes good. I go, you right now, his name is Jeff Right. So he thinks I'm calling. He goes, yeah, that's me. I'm Jeff Right, not realizing I just did his bit. I was trying to like like if someone came up to Uston was like, and I was like, where where the where? They're right? So he didn't get it right, he didn't get the joke. And then um, and then the guy next him is Michael Shoemaker. Michael Shoemaker.

Michael Shoemaker is one of Seth's head writers. I think he is the head writer right. He used to be the head writer of Saturday Night Live. He's been the head writer on a bunch of comedy shows, movies, TV shows. He's all, he was so high up at SNL. He mad he was like one of the people that would go to like auditioning new members. Michael Schumacher is a legend. So I was like, hey, Michael, can I get a picture? No, you don't want to picture me. I'm just the writer.

I go, are you kidding, I'm a comedy writer. You're like, yes, let's get a picture. So Michael Schumacher was very cool. So I go back to talking of Seth and I'm like, so then, so Seth. Seth did a bit in his in his segment about how his sister in law sings this kid's song that she thinks she wrote. So in the bit, he says, he goes, he went on YouTube and found ten thousand people singing that song. So he goes, He's like, tell us to listen, you didn't write that song.

You may have heard it as a kid, but you didn't write that song. There's ten thousand people singing that song. You didn't write that song. And her response to Seth was, according to the joke, oh my god, these people ripped me off. So but the way he tells it's very funny. So we're backstage with Seth and so my friend Jeff sist him. My god, that joke with the two Jews brilliant. So Seth says, you know what, it's so illiant. I

can't believe nobody told that joke before. So me, being quick witted, I go, you know what you should do, go on YouTube and see if there's ten thousand people telling the same joke. And he looked at me like he didn't get the reference, didn't kick it, didn't write like I thought he's gonna. I thought he right. I thought he'd looked at me and go, Brodie, that's that's very clever. That's funny. You just took my old bit and that's a callback call back to instead instead scary.

You and I have done this. Every celebrity will do this at some point when you meet them, right when you talk to them, they're gonna say something that for a second you think is them giving you what you want and being polite, and they're also wrapping it up. So you know, when a comic gets the red light that means and you know, when you're in a bar and they blink the lights, yes, scared having my music ready? So uh and they blink the lights. Last call right.

So I say to Seth, you should go on YouTube and seeing the ten thousand people who've already done the joke before, and he looks at me and he goes, uh, hey, you want to grab a picture? You want to grab a picture? Is like, hey, before you leave, let's get that picture. Now. I'm not faulting Seth. I recognized it as someone who has occasionally been someone who people want to get my picture. So like, I'm looked at, I'm like a level one celebrity, but you also take social cues. Well,

yes and yes. It's like he's given the wrap up sign, right, this is my missionment to impress Seth Myers, and he just gave me that you want to get a picture. So I was like absolutely, and I acted like I didn't realize what he did because he's he wasn't being rude, but he just did a long show. He already taped his late night talk show. He's tired. He didn't come there to have a casting call with Brody and the comedy writer. So I I go stand next to him and he puts his all him around me and my

friend Jeff. He's in the middle, so our arms are around Seth Meyers. His arms are around us in a really nice picture. So Jeff Wright says, I'll take the picture for you and takes my android camera. Jeff Right is an iPhone user, so Jeff Right, Jeff Right is taking multiple pictures and they're all blurry, and Seth is like alright. Seth is holding the smile, like, oh my god, good the Jeff and Jeff's like, what do I hit?

And I'm like the wife button. So then like I'm like, I can't leave Seth because his arm is around me, so I can't go to help Jeff. So then Jeff's like holding the picture down by his boobs. I'm like, can you hold it a little bit higher? So he's like, oh yeah, okay, yeah and Seth and Seth says, it's all about the angles Jeff got hold on. I gotta hold it up at higher. So then he's like so he took like he goes, you know what they're coming out? Dark? Let me put the flash on. How do you put

the flash? Now, I'm not doing it. I'm not saying it, but Set's like, oh yeah, you want to get a good shot. So then he figures out the flash. He takes a couple of pictures the flash. He says, he look, make sure they come out. Okay. I said, yeah, I don't know if I even get to meet us again, Seth. Let me just the pictures were great, So I said, there was a pleasure meeting you. No problem, I said, Jeff, can we grab a quick picture? He says, sure, man,

no problem. So, um, I haven't taken my picture of Michael Shoemaker yet, so uh so then so Shoemaker says, hey, I'll take the picture for you. I know how to use the phone. Okay, great, I'm not gonna ask Seth take the picture. That's a that's above. You can't ask the really famous guy do it. Right. So it's like asking Elvis to hold the camera to take a picture of us, right, right? Can you take a picture of me with the Brooklyn boys would throw the camera down,

step on it. You know, I'm joking as so Shoemaker as the writer, and I know as a writer you always step in for the talent, right, Like I would take the pictures. Elvis wouldn't have to, not that he wouldn't. So it's Shoemaker goes, hey, I'll get the picture of you and Jeff, right, so so I'm on Jeff's left side. Scary. You know, I gotta be on the right side. You know, that's my side. I don't like the left side. But

I turned my head. I don't like the angle. So he takes the picture, he goes, he go, and I look at the picture and it's awful. It's awful. It's every angle wrong, it's he held it too low. It's just bad. I look bad. I don't look good. So I said, hey, um, I hate to ask, I'm I really like you guys. Can I switch sides with you?

And it's because I have it's my bad side? And Jeff looked at me like, yeah, man, sure, no problem, you right, And Shoemaker looked at Seth Myers like you gotta be fucking kidding me, like and I felt like, oh my god, I'm that guy that you are, that guy they made read a bit about you and they oh my god, oh my god, they're gonna act out of sketch, like yeah, like, can I get I can see Jeff right doing a bit where he takes a picture of himself and he goes, that's not my good side.

Can we switch? Like like I never would have done that to Seth because when we went into the I've told Jeff I'm standing on the right fuck you, but with Jeff. Jeff was in the hallway, Jeff Wright, the comedian, but he was very nice. He switched sides at me. But when Shoemaker looked over at Seth like and I felt like saying, No, guys have been in the business for twenty almost thirty years. I'm a comedy guy. I've done stand up and sketch. I get it. I that

was a mistake on my part. Erase a race. Delete that. Don't hold that against me, right, So I got the picture. I took a picture of Shoemaker. Was great. I couldn't have been nicer. And uh anyway, I said, and i'd Seth, thank you for everything. We went home. The first thing I did when I got outside, Like when I got home, I tweeted all of them, so nice meeting you. Thanks for your patience. It was great. I really it was you very funny. Thank you. Michael. Shoemaker wrote me back,

it was great meeting you as well. I could have left it there. So I could have left it there, I wrote back, Hey, really, thank you for getting back to me. Hopefully we get to work together Sunday. I feel like I shouldn't have done that. But he didn't write back here. But I didn't hear anything from Jeff Wright, who I'm still a fan of, and I didn't expect here from Seth because he has like a million followers. But I blew it right, like I fani think he did.

I think you yeah, I think you did. And you know what, you know what? I think you got. It's like you got the girl and then you like, you know, you're two pump chumped. You know what? You know? You know what? The funny part is is that Seth Myers replaced Jimmy Fallon on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon, and Jimmy Fallon replaced uh Conan O'Brien on Late Night with Conan O'Brien. Cornan O'Brien replaced David Letterman on Late Night

with David Letterman. Right, Okay, When I was seventeen years old, I used to watch David Letterman every night, every night on Late Night with David Letterman, every night for years. I didn't miss an episode. I would VCR it back in the day, and so I arranged my college schedule to go in late so I could stay up late

to watch Late Night with David Letterman. And when I got to meet David Letterman UH at Rockefeller Center, I waited from the come down the elevator after taping UH, I fan BOYD and I said in retrospect almost the exact same things to Letterman that I said to Seth Meyers and vice versa. I said, oh my god, I stay up late. I watched you every night. I'm a big fan. I don't miss an episode. I arranged my life or on watching your show. And I realized I have grown not a bit when it comes to late

night talk show comics. I like there's something to be said though that that is very endearing. You know. I'm listening to this and and I'm saying, you know, Brodie, he's very you as a stand up comic. It's like full circle. You get to meet your idol. This is where this is the way I was with weird A Yankovic. We've talked about this before. This is this is the comparison that I can give, and it's that it's very

it's cute, it's very Uh. I can't but you know, because you're meeting your idols and then you're getting all right, now, wait a minute, have you met weird Al? I met were now with you and we've actually got to meet right the first time you spoke to on the phone. The time that I really fucked up was the time

on the phone. But this is the analogy that I'm making because said, well, luckily for me, by the time you Ronnie and I interviewed uh weird Al where you lost it and babbled on terrible, I had already met him a couple of times back go, backstage, passed, so you got it out of your system right. To me, it was like, oh, I've spoken to you before, and because when I met him, I got to speak to him.

It was a very very these three guys, these are like three dudes in a row that you have highly you know it was because an up and coming superstar, a freaking legend of comedy writing. Yeah snl and fallon. Uh yeah, I know you're doing it now by the way you but you know what, he's very unassuming, just a casual guy. He's like, hey, I'm like, you know, Michael sounds like and you know, it's funny. They definitely talked.

They talked about you by the way. And that's if I feel like, if I ever meet him again, I'm not going to mention we met like, I'm not gonna be like they're gonna remember you. No. No. In fact, I'm sure they're learning security and printing out pictures of you right now. If you see this guy, don't let him in. But you know what, people listen, people fanboy, fan girl, us and I love it. I because I get it. We're not famous. But if you meet someone

you really are excited to meet. I edit. I just every time I think I'm immune to it, I'm not immune to it. So it happens to the best of us. It does. It's podcast. You want to play some sound and then I got, first off, a warning for everybody before we go any further. Um, this is just disgusting. This happened recently with Instagram. Oh I want people to follow along, okay, because this is disgusting. Instagram recently pulled a fast one on all of us. There's like snakes

in the grass here. They decided what is right and wrong for you to watch and see. As far as videos and pictures, they've all they've said, you know what, there's some pictures and video that may upset you or you may find upset. This is called censorship at its finest. Well, here's why. Because the default, the default setting is to limit it. It's it's the limit. If they didn't give you the option when they when they threw this in the app, an alert never came up that said, hey,

there's this new feature here, what do you want to do? Instead, they made the default and I will read it for bat him, and then I'm gonna show you all how to correct it real quick. They're gonna limit the amount of photos and videos that you might find upsetting, and that is the default setting. And yet I still saw your pictures from the weekend, Hio. So what you need to do to correct that is go to your profile page on your Instagram the three herts on the lines.

Click on that. Okay, Brodi, you should do this with me right now. And then click on still because I don't update my app. Then click on settings and then click on account and then there's a line that says sensitive content control. Click on that. The default is limit. Some of the photos and videos that could be upsetting are offensive. You now click the oopped back in. They OpEd you out, They OpEd you out. Did not click allow.

Allow means you may see more phoe those in videos that could be upsetting or offensive, and I'm okay with that, as most people should, because otherwise I don't imagine though there's young people, or religious people or squirmish people who maybe don't want to see horrible things. I don't think it's like the other thing. In the boobs, they block the boob. It's what Instagram demes don't block the boobs,

baby setting or offensive. So if you don't want to see other points of view, if you don't want to see, well, if there's a political post I disagree with, then they want to block that, I'm fine with that. You don't want to see the whole story, but that's problem, you know somebody, I'm the guy who reported their gross porn, but I want the option to report the gross porn. So look, I think they should have had a message

pop up. Absolutely, they should have said for them in the background, assume you want to see less, but you got a message right now? The was the message? Did the message have a link that said click here to change it? They no, Yeah, they made There's there's three bubbles. The bubble one is allow, the Bubble two is the default, which you mean limit, and then there's a third bubble which you can choose limit even more, which obviously you would choose for your kids. You have to go into

the ball. Kids see worse than I do. I'm saying you have to go into the back side of the app. You have to go. I'm saying, you know, you have to go literally go in like four or five screen by the app dinner first before you try that four or five screens. You have to go in before you can four or five clicks to get to the to the section that I just mentioned. You really want to see the Uh, well, I just want I want all points of view expressed. I want to see everything. You

want to see the big head. You want to see the pig head at the roast. Yeah, I want to see the pig head. See they may block that out. Uh it's probably more like violence and uh gore maybe and like maybe fights, you know, like like a brawl boobs boobs by By the way, I got to talking about a brawl on the second, Remind me pizza brawl. If you haven't seen the Pizza ball, have you seen the pizza bowl? Oh, you gotta love the pizza brawl. We're gonna have to you have to send out the

link to the pizza brawl. Um, so you know what. I agree they should, but they gave you the option. I feel like they gave the option. Yeah, but they didn't tell you it even existed. They applied this filter in the background as a default, And that's the devious part. I don't know what I would like them to do. I would like them to have the app that's the option where it says view it with a notification. In other words, I want to see with like a red

frame around it, what I would have missed out on? Well, right, like like if if something comes up and then you go, oh, red frame, So if I had opted out, I wouldn't have seen that. Oh I'm not opting out, or oh I would have not wanted to see that. So I would like to know what, like who's the censor, who's the guy? Normally, I don't like people making decisions for me. I'm with you. I would like to not have them decide what I want opted out. I like the option

of hitting the that says what happened to freedom? Freedom is being taken away from us. First of all, it's not freedom. It's an app. It's a private company. You know, you're still allowed to go out and curse the government. That's not everybody. You confuse and First Amendment with an app. It's like it's like certain people in the news. If you're barred from Facebook, that's not your First Amendment, right. It's a private company that can do whatever they want.

Instagram show. Why are they telling me what I should watch and what I shouldn't. That's what I have a problem with. I think what they're doing is they're saying, hey, do you want us to protect you or not? Now I don't want them to protect me, That's fine. I don't like that. It's an opt in. I would rather them saying, hey, listen, we're not blocking your ships to block We're gonna my guests. To be honest with you, my guests. Is a lot of people complained. Maybe there's

a couple of lawsuits about horrific things. There's gotta be some It's always about money. There's got to be some monetary reason. Maybe the advertisers, uh, are we like didn't want their ads next of like horrific ship? Well I'm not, I'm okay. Well we'll go any further on it, but I'm with you anyway, that was just a public service for everybody. If you want to see all of Instagram, you have to opt yourself back in because they fucking

opted out as a default. Anyway, Uh, gonna play some sound that the Barney the Bull is still nowhere to be found. We never bring up Barney the Bull when we're talking about the cow, but I should have it a little worked together, Barnie, Barnie the Bull store because as of the taping of this podcast, a problem. We have big problems in little little river city. So there's this man we have. We have big trouble in a little little city, little River right. No, anyway, the pound bull, okay,

that escaped from this Long Island farm last week. It's been missing now for like a week and a half. It's been on the loose, and there's been local sightings of this bull like charging down street. Then one day better. This is Manorville, Long Island out in Suffolk County. They finally like two hours from Manhattan. Yeah, they finally they

finally captured or they finally trapped it. They thought so they thought in a cave or whatever it was supposed to be part of a religious ceremony where they were going to slaughter it and eat it. But and the this this bull knew that it was going out to pasture, that it's done, it's done finished. So the bull had the sixth sense and it said fuck it, and it it literally busted out of the farm and it was

charging through the streets anyway. Several sidings later, several days later, they finally find they think that they've cornered it in a cave or some area that they couldn't get into. So they took a cow that was in heat, a female cow to lure, to lure the bull out from where it was. Hold on a second, you're you're pissing a lot of people off. Who know the difference a bull? If you listen to the joke I told earlier, is a male? Yes, cow, cows are ordered for food, usually

give milk. But a female cow is a correct male? Is a ball? All cows or female? No, not necessarily, yeah, but when you say cow, it's usually female. A male is a bull either, there are male cows, it's called a bull. No, it's not the the male version of a cow is a bull. No, it's not absolutely cow. There's a male cow and a female cow. Okay, we google this when don't tweet us, and I'll read it to you right now. An adult male is known as a bull. Many male cattle are castrated to reduce their

aggressive tendencies. Um are are any cows. Male male cow may refer to a bull, but so cows can be either. But a bull is a male. But it's but it's a bowl. So they did. What I'm saying is they brought a female cat alone and then it's definitely not a bull, feal cow to lure the bull, That's what I'm saying. Like like like they were like there was a cow, a female cow in heat as opposed to a male cow. Female cow right and was hanging out and they were just trying to lure the fucking bull out.

Now apparently that was the last we heard of this, and then we found out the bull never came out and it has gone again. It's on the loose. So whatever a week. We don't know how this happened. So anyway, so we're keeping an eye on keeping it. Where is there give me a bull's eye on this. Yeah, maybe is that some restaurant is serving it. But anyway, that's the bull that the guy the sports guys are gonna buy could be whatever it is. It's just fascinating that

they can't capture this bull. They said that when they do capture it, it's going to go to a sanctuary, so it will, uh, it will live in peace, it will not get slaughtered. So the bullets, they say that, we're like when and your parents give away your dog and they say they're going to send it to a farm. That's that they're putting it down. So there's that a

lot of bullshit. That is bullshit. That's correct, Thank you, all right, do we do have some sound let's go and we have some email, and I want to tell you what happened to me Friday's all right, give me the even the clips have full clips? Got uh the d m V okay, So before I play these clips, I just want to read Adam Michael Zeno on Twitter. Damn it Brody and the Brooklyn Boys. By the way, a lot of people this week have tweeted me and the Brooklyn Boys and again have left scary after tweets.

It's important. I want him to see the funny too. Uh, damn it, David Brody and the Brooklyn Boys. You ruin this commercial for me. Uh, it's the Field of Dreams commercial with Verse in it, the Major League Baseball commercial with Verse. So uh, someone did see the commercial and they were bothered by it. Okay, So two weeks ago, three episodes ago, I think you talked about scary being on a plane. Just remind everybody about the the double

messages you got. Yeah, basically, they said the message on the plane in English and then all of a sudden they do a Spanish version of it and it was a half the not even half the wine. It was like a third of the length. I'm like, wait to say, there's no way that they could have given that entire full message. I heard in English that was two and a half minutes long. In Spanish that was thirty seconds long. Bullshit, there's no way that they're missing out on some of

the message. So I went to the d m V and I'm going to tell you the DMV story. I think maybe next episode because the Friday story has has pushed its way in. But while I was at the DMV, I thought of that conversation and Uh, they on a loop, a NonStop loop where if you work there, you want to put you want to kill yourself, not that you didn't want to any way, work at a dm V.

But it's the same message over and over again. And I noticed that the English version, because he's I speak English, right, is very light, moved, boring, But the Spanish version sounds very fancy, right, and so I kept hearing them saying the fancy and I had to like then google it using a Google translator to see which words the fancy words. So play the message listen now boring English one was now you're in a d m V, the walls are gray, everybody's in a bad mood. And then the English version

comes on you like what. Then the Spanish version is like, lay, listen to it. He played the club d zero nine three at counter number seven, they wasted at all. The middle sounds sexy and at most right, So exactly play it again. Listen to the guys giving a number and telling you what counter to go up to zero nine three at counter number seven they wasted at all and

most of Yeah, she's like settle. I'm like if I if I spoke Spanish fluently, I would feel better about going to the d m V. So that word and mostreador what do you think it means? I'll tell you what it means. What do you think it means? I don't know. What do you think it means? Give me like it sounds sex, Get into bed. I'm going to report to a certain counter. It means counter. Yeah, that's it. I'm got all excited. I'm like, what does that word mean?

It's so it's so she's saying it's so hot. He's like, now I have his arm here. Oh okay. So I'm watching a baseball program and sometimes they'll say a picture throws effortlessly where the ball just seems to easily come out of his hand. Right, It just his motion is throng motion. The ball just it like just shoots out

of his hand. Right, What is this guy saying? So, I just think that for a guy with electric stuff, it's really hard to learn that because on any given day, I mean, his arm always looks like it's coming out of his hands so easy. Oops, his arm is coming out of his hand. Yeah, he fumbled, but how do you how do you hit that arm? Jedi subway? Okay, here's an example of a commercial that in t now look subways having some problems lately they're being sued for

not having tuned in their tuna. There's what was it? There was no chicken in their chicken. Uh? It was a Swedish lab said that that there's not enough bread in the bread because the sugar count is too high in the bread. That's not really bread, it's a pastry. So uh, you want to you want a commercial that promotes your product? Correct? Now, what is a subway sandwich? It's like sandwich, right, it's all bread, right, it's not a lot of Look, a subway is good if you're

in a mood for it. I'm not bashing on subway, but they can use a good commercial. So there's a new commercial with um, uh Stephen Curry, right, Stefan f Cary. Uh, oh god, I forget her name. Um, she's a woman's uh one of the Oh god, Um, I'm gonna tell you what her name is. She's one of the women's soccer stars. Right, she's the one with the crazy hair. Uh. Should have had her name. I want to get her name right for this. I'm looking it up right now.

Megan Rapino, Right, Megan Rapinos in the commercial. Okay, And they're talking about the menu and the great items and it's a it's a cool commercial. Then Tom Brady comes onto the commercial. He jumps in at the end. Now, Tom Brady, if you've if you know anything about him, I believe he's a vegetarian, but he also eats incredibly healthy. He's on a crazy health diet and he said he credits it as to how he lives and plays football and wins the Super Bowl in his forties. Right, he's

on a crazy eating schedule. So play the clip and you tell me where this commercial goes wrong. This new turkey Kelly Fresh is incredible, leaven eat bread. It's a commercial, okay, So just get turkey. Kelly Fresh is incredible, leaven, eat bird. Step it's a commercial. Tom Brady is a vegan, kay. So first of all, there are there are sandwiches he could have been holding. He says, this chicken sandwich is incredible. So first of all, he didn't need chicken. He's vegan, okay.

Second of all, Steph Carry says do you even eat bread? And Brady goes to it. It's a commercial. So what you're saying is it's okay to lie. You're right. Not only that, but Stephen Stefan Stefan Steph carry points out the fact that he's healthy and doesn't eat bread and then admits he's lying. Hey man, it's a commercial. So the writer of the commercials like, that'll be funny. We'll be like, that's a commercial, right, can you imagine I'll

still a commercial going. But bro, do you don't like pizza? Dude? I'm it's a commercial for slice. Shut up like the turkey. Telly Fresh is incredible? Heavy heat Bird a commercial? Wow? How bad is that chicken? Why is he going a subway commercial? He's the healthiest guy on the planet. No, It's like it's like Derek Cheeta when he used to do commercials for UM, for Ford, he'd be in a Ford Edge. Hey, Derek Jeter, you've got an edge here,

like Derek doesn't does not drive a Ford Edge. Tiger Woods doesn't drive a buerkless saber like at least make it believable like Tiger. I'm sorry, I know you're you're that's what they're But this commercial is the opposite of what those guys did. But because this is this is the admission, Well, this is Brady, this is Tom Brady being honest, and the audience knowing that he's a vegan. So you know, it's like it's almost like, you know,

you mentioned you mentioned Tiger Woods. You're pointing out that bread's bad. You can't have it both ways. Then what do you want to do? Do you want to go to the route of let's lie to the audience completely and say this is good when the audience is going to call bullshit and saying that you're a vegan the same way that you're calling out Tiger Woods. Anybody shouldn't

be doing it. Here's what he should have done. He shouldn't have done it back right, Tom Brady should have faded back to pass and through a perfect spiral of the chicken sandwich to Steph, who grabs the thing, goes chicken sandwich nice, right, Like do something sports e where Brady's in there, and you're like, of course Brady threw it away. He wouldn't need it, but it looks like

a football pass. But he's throwing it away because in real life, the creative team, Brodie, they need Michael Schumacher, who I got to meet. By the way, I embarrassed myself. You got anything else before I tell you about Friday? I gotta run very soon. Because we're hosting that that charity event tonight. It's a run walk. Oh yeah, that's happening very soon part with Purpose. Um, it's gonna be too late by the time you hear this podcast, but oh it's a good charity. I don't mind you plugging it.

But still audio. You can still go to the website donation Party with Purpose dot org and you'll see what we did tonight. Anyway, Well, you know what, now that you pull up the charity card, I'm gonna give you the short story. Can I? And I just I'm gonna give you what happened at the with my computer? Can I do that? Yeah? Because you delayed this podcast. We were supposed to be recording about three hours before, and I'm like, where's here's why, Here's why I was late

for the podcast. So about a year and a month and a half ago, I bought a laptop computer from my mom because she was gonna be in a rehab facility for a few days. And I was like, you know what, your iPads not good enough. I want to be able to zoom with you because I couldn't visit her because of the pandemic. I'm gonna get you a laptop. So I got her a fourteen inch HP laptop, not not expensive but nice, nice picture, nice clarity. And she

used it once, I think, right. We zoomed once and it's like, yeah, I don't really have a need for it. At home, I use my iPad, never use it again. So recently she's like, you know, I have this thing. You should just take it. I'm not gonna use it. I appreciate the gift, but you take it, I'm not gonna use it. So I took the computer back and

I and uh. I didn't use it for a couple of months, and about two weeks ago because when I'm out in my pool scary, I like to set up my iPad and I watched the Mets game while I'm in my pool, right, and I kept thinking to myself, I want a bigger screen. My iPad is like ten inches ten and f inches. I'd like something bigger screen. Then it dawned on me, I've got this laptop with

a fourteen inch screen. So I've been bringing the laptop for a few days out to the pool, prop it up on a chair so it doesn't get wet, and I watched the Met game on a bigger screen. It looks great. Well because the computer has been dormant for a year. Every couple of days it's doing Windows updates, right, Windows updates updating, Windows ten Windows up Windows Update. And it says like, don't turn it off doing an update. So, uh,

what's today? Tuesday? So Sunday, after my my my my daily double of hot tub pool, I leave it plugged in. And yesterday Monday, I go out to the pool my laptop and I got to turn it on because I left it on, plugged in for the updates. I opened it up and it's black, blank screen. So I I'm like, oh, you know what, it must have just locked up in an update. I turn it off. I turned it back on. I hear the fan go on. Nothing, the screen is blank,

black screen, nothing. I don't hear anything. I'm like, oh, ship, this is terrible. So I go online and it's it gives you five things to do. It says, h take the battery out and hold the power button down. Let it reset, Put the battery back in and you're good. That didn't work. Take the memory card out, put the memory card back in. That didn't work. Haul down this combination of keys that didn't work. I did everything I'm supposed to. Nothing on the screen. It's dead dead dead

dead did So? I call HP today and uh they tell me you're not under warranty. You bought it in April. I say no, but I didn't give it to my mother until August and she used it once and I just started using it again. It's brand new. I haven't even downloaded a file. Yeah, you bought it in April. Sorry, more than a year. Whatever it is, you're not under warranty. I said, Well, if I go to the warranty people, do I have to pay for the warranty? Yes, you

have to pay for warranty tech support. How much is it? What if they can't fix it? Well, I think you can work it out with them. They probably won't charge you, probably won't charge me. So so uh I I transfer over. I get another person from who knows where in the world, and they say, uh, yeah, we can. We can fix it for you over the phone. I said, Okay, what if it's a hardware problem. You can't fix hardware over

the phone. Well, most of the time it's software. So I tell them everything I did, and they go, it could be hardware, but we have to get your credit card. We have to charge of fort nine, so I said, I said, before we can go any further, we can't give an opinion. They go, we can't. They can't say what we think it is. They won't say a word. So I said, but it's brand new. Nope, can't do it. I said, well, what happens if uh, you can't fix it? Do I get my fort nite nine the nine back? No,

that's the evaluation fee. What No, I'm not I'm not paying that. So I go, I'll call you back. So I call the geek Squad at best Buy. Now the Geek Squad. No one's answering the phone at best Buy. You can't talk to them. You get corporate. Corporate then tells you we don't know. The policy depends on what's wrong with it. Could be hard, so we can't tell you the price. But you can call back the store and enter this code. There's a if you want to

get the geek Squad, it's a whole procedure. You gotta gett a push pound and then you gotta pushed When they said, what's the extension you put into get the geek Squad? So I get the geek Squad now keep in mind, scared, I pay two thirty five dollars for this laptop to forty maybe not all. The geek squad tells me, yeah, you bring it in because I will give me an appointment whatever, blah blah blah. I said, how much is it to look at it? A hundred

dollars doubled? So I said, well, well if okay, but but if if I have to get it repaired, you put that hundred towards the repair, right, No, no, nope, everyone does that. No, we don't put it towards the repair. Well, how much does the repair? Well, uh, it's it's eighty dollars for labor plus the parts. So I said, but so now I'm a hundred eighty dollars plus parts if it's hardware and you've only paid you best I bought

it from you guys. Yep, that's our policy. So geek Squad I said, nope, sorry, let me call back HP and ask them if the fifty dollars goes towards the repair and how much is it to fix the computer, because she mentioned to me we have an HP drop off. We can fix the computer for you. We have the parts, it's our computer. We guarantee we'll be able to fix it. Okay, great, So I call HP back. I go through the whole process again, Push one, push three, push two, whatever. I

get the warranty department. You're not on the warranty yep, no, I know that. I know, I got it. I just want to let you know this is yep, No, I got it. So I said, if I if we can't fix it and it's not a software issue, like maybe the display burnt out, maybe it was in the sun too long, I don't know. Scary, she says to me, there's a flat rate. Whatever's wrong with it. For the flat rate, we fix it. Oh fantastic, okaych that no scary. You tell me how much does HP charge as a

flat rate to fix my lapt depending on the model? Scary, five hundred or six dollars to fix it two dollar laptop. I knew you were going to scam. Is HP pulling me here? That's on top of I knew you're gonna be under order? Yeah, listen, six hundred and fifty? So what do you hun? So here's where it gets better. So I go on my Facebook page for my town and I say, can somebody recommend a local computer guy

that will do a free estimate on the repair. So a bunch of people right back to me, and I'm not gonna use his real name, and they say, you gotta call Tommy. So I look on previous people asking for computer recommendations and they all say you gotta call Tommy. So I called Tommy, and Tommy is now. Keep in mind, my computer goes on, the fan goes on, the screen's not working. And by the way, I left one thing out.

I did hook an HDMI cable up and tried to hook it up to the TV and that didn't work either. Nothing came out. So something is not the video card, maybe bad whatever. So I reached out to Tommy, and Tommy says, yep, I don't charge for estimates. Tell me what's wrong. You can bring the computer by. So he talks me through what to do, and he says, you know, the video card is either one of two plugs in the top left corner right. I had to cover all already. He says, one's a big one, one's a medium one,

and one's a little one. One you pull out and one you lift up. He says, pull the one out that you have to pull out and lift up the other one, let him sit for thirty seconds, and put him back in. Okay, thanks Tommy, no problem. I pop it out, I put it back in. I put the thing, I flip put the little flip down. I'm done. I feel I feel like I accomplish something. He just put the battery back in and put the battery back in. I screw it down. I feel like I'm a technician.

Now guess what. He goes, plug it in. Let's see if it works. I plug it in, and now the thing has no power. It won't even turn on. Ship. You're in a worse spot than you were before. I thought you a call Tommy. Everybody, no free Tommy fucked me because now my computer won't go on. Because Tommy said, pull the plug, lift the flap, put him back. That's all I did. And now it doesn't work. And now you know what he says. You know what you can do. You can sell it for parts if you want. People

need parts. Fucking I've got shipped. Now I gotta sell the battery and the screen and it's all funning nothing Tommy, He's fault Tommy Dodg. Just pull the plug and put it back. Oh, he goes, you may have You may have hit the motherboard. Did you tell me I might? Did you warn me about the motherboard? And he said, ship me the plug out and put it back in. These are the same pizza. These are the same people, by the way, that recommended the testical pizza in your town. Yeah,

you gotta call Tommy. You gotta try this pizza. I called the testical pizza. Computer did so. Now, Tommy says, listen, come over my house later because he lives in town. He goes, is he gonna offer you a warm bath and reach around? I already checked him out. He's a legit computer specialist. He works in an I t death he's a good guy. I'm gonna bring the thing over there and hope he can fix what I said. He goes, I'll take a look, and I go, do you have

testing a like to see? What? Where? The where they sound electricity? He says, no, what is this, Tommy the pinballll wizard deftum. Yes, show place to me. So my options are spend six hundred dollars to fix my two laptop, spend a hundred and eighty dollars plus parts at at best Buy, where I bought the thing, buy a new one, or go to Tommy and see if you at least get it to power to be continued. Yeah, so I'll let you guys know next week. What you what option

I chose? This is like playing Dragon's Layer and you're trying to go down the right road and you just fucking fall dragons Layers at old school reference. I own Dragon's Labs, first major laser this game. All right, go to charity work in the meantime. Just buy an apple, please, no mucking my an apple. But I'm gonna buy some pizza. I'm gonna use a Slice app again tonight because I'm angry. I don't put hungry over Brooklyn, right, So what Brooklyn? Brooklyn Boys, brock Brooklyn