#177: Don't Cut Me In Line! - podcast episode cover

#177: Don't Cut Me In Line!

Jun 04, 20211 hr 24 minEp. 177
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Episode description

#177: The clever ways people use bribery to cut lines; Skeery is afraid to wear a T-shirt because people may take the graphic the wrong way; Brody gets out-Karen'ed after his wifi router fiasco; Skeery discovered a new restaurant tip Scamboni; Skeery's Speaking Volumes Podcast partner Cher Cosenza calls in because the major motion picture she's starring in, Death In Texas, is released in theaters and On Demand nationwide!

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Transcript

Speaker 1

Today's Thursday. We normally record on Wednesday, So I ordered my lasagna through Slice yesterday, so I feel like I should have ordered Slice again. Well, I got my Pizza Republic waiting for me as soon as we're done with the show. For everybody else, you gotta go to Slice life dot com and get five dollars off your first order using code Brooklyn. So do like we just did, support your local pizza place, say five dollars on your

first order Keyward Brooklyn. Slice is the largest network of independent pizzerias in the country and that's why we love them. Guess who just got that today? There Brooklyn mos that it'd been away. They both have so much to see. You know their names. A brilliant Scaring began toast episode one seventy seven and Brooken Boys podcast, and we were playing that music. That's the we were off for a week on vacation music, even though we weren't really off

of vacation. I mean, normally we wouldn't be playing that here because we would have had an episode last week, but we didn't, so we're playing it. So yeah, so you know what, Uh, we did a piss poor job of notifying the people you think I took a personal week. Uh, and we weren't able to do a podcast because I wasn't around equipment and a lot a lot going on

in YadA, YadA and YadA. And by the time that we picked up all the pieces, it was Friday, and we're like, uh, not only did you take a personal week, but uh, we didn't eds you a podcast. Uh. And the slices are clamoring for one. Uh yeah, so apologies, although somebody damn me and said, did your podcast get canceled? Which I'm not. I'm not sure how that opened. We do our own thing, like we don't like exactly like cancel culture. Yeah, like you can't fire us from our podcast.

It's our podcast, so not so there you go. But one of these days we will quit and that's how it will get canceled. But no one didn't even want to think that's the possibility. And it's like it's like, did you want you didn't watch the Friends Reunion? Right? Not yet? Okay, So they talked about how they thought the show would go on forever because it was so successful, like, oh, this is not gonna cancel the show. At the height

of their success, they canceled themselves. Well, the network canceled them because at some point they were married and had babies and it was a different show. I'm thinking of Seinfeld, the show that went out on top. They could have done five seasons. Oh, absolutely, absolutely, they could have, but they didn't. So and then the finale wasn't great. The

Friends finale was very good. I have to say, I'd like to think that you and I will be here doing this podcast long after we are off the Big Show or the Big Show finishes, you know, not that that not that I see that end anytime. But if the Strand Morning Show ends, that doesn't mean we end. No, at some point we'll need to get jobs. But hopefully this will keep us busy and in the industry of industry,

I mean the business. Yeah, and that's the point where we put ourselves behind a paywall, and it's thirty dollars a month because because we're broke. I don't know about thirty dollars a month. I'm kidding, I'm kidding, or a dime something like that. Yeah, speaking of walls, no names, but there was a guy he used to be He was on in New York radio for a really long time, really long. Oh, I know who you're talking about. This is embarrassing. Well yeah, well there's there's two parts to this.

I'll tell you that the the we'll talk about the first part where he built like a zillion dollars studio in the middle of nowhere after his radio show went off, right, so he moved on. He moved to Texas, I think, and he built a huge radio studio and said I don't need to restore radio anymore. And he signed on with some third rate wrestling association. And then he's been

doing commercials where he's promoting his action figure. But it makes it look like the Wrestling Federation, not the w w F, the w w A, not the like not the real one, but like this other wrestling company is promoting his action figure. But it's not he bought the action figure. He's paying for commercials and has wrestling in the background. But he started a podcast with a paywall and not what was this like, it's like a month. There was a lot of money. It was a lot

of money. But people like I'm gonna show you the funny and all my listeners from radio for the last forty years, his voice, his voice radio listens are gonna follow me over. Guess what, he's not Howards Stern. They did not, they did not follow him. I don't think

he does his podcast anymore. I don't know, but I think you have to like if we did this for pay like, I'm not let me stay for the record, I'm not confident that that, let's say, this was our this was our thing that we did for a living focus, our sole focused and we like dedicated all the time energy to this right as our only job. I am not confident that people would follow us over if we put ourselves behind a paywall, because listen, if it's for free,

it's for me. I mean, listen, We'll talk about free dessert all day. But if you gotta pay now, all of a sudden, everybody's got out of alligator arms and uh, you know, long pockets with the money they don't know. And by the way, we aren't testing the water. This is just us talking. Yeah, Now, this is a if I if there was a podcast I loved, you know what? I Would I pay five dollars a month? That seems like a nominal fee. Would I pay fifty dollars a year?

That sounds like more money? Right? Even though fifty dollars a year is less than five dollars a month. It sounds like more, doesn't it. Yes, we would have to give. We would have to give the show. We would have to give more episodes a week for starters. If we're going to charge you any monthly fee, that's not now you Now you're just torpedo and the whole thing. Shush. No, you think we're gonna skate by on once a week and have people paid. If you pay five dollars a month,

that's a dollar episode. That's not a lot of money. But that's like buying a song on on iTunes. And who doesn't die anymore? Well, we're we're an hour, hour and fifteen minute podcast usually, so that's much longer on a song. I don't know. I'm not even thinking about this stuff. But the whole point was that that guy tried to do that. He gambled and lost, which is why I'm scared. That's why i'm again. I think our slices are more loyal. I don't think his people were loyal.

I think they listened to him because he was what was on the station they liked. I think you have to have people like you, right, Like there was no passion for him, like Elvis could Elvis could do that. Yeah, you think Elvis. Elvis retires in twenty years, he could probably do a podcast where people would check in, you know. Yeah, okay, okay, So I want to give a little backstory. We had no problem. We're gonna We're gonna do the podcast today at like two o'clock in the afternoon. You know. Yeah.

I was ready to go. In fact, I you to tweet last night that said, hey, slices tomorrow, a new podcast is coming in the afternoon, and here it is. Any So people were already deeming me, going, well, where is it. Right, Here's what happens. I sat down in my basement studio. I turned off the dryer, which my kid had closed in the dryer. She came down, She's like, hey, my clothes are way. I was like, I have to podcast. Oh I need my clothes for tonight. So that was typical,

you know, teenage situation. However, we weren't recording. So it wasn't the end of the world. Why weren't we recording? Well, uh, we we set everything up and and uh, I said to Scary, so are you ready to go? And I hear this yeah, I'm ready to go like like eight seconds days. So then so then I I go to repeat it because like, why aren't you answering me? I said, I did answer you, so there was silence and said totally why aren't you talking? Basically, there was a terrible delay.

And it was like a terrible delay four second delay between me hearing Brody and responding and then Brodie hearing me back and him responding. Could you imagine if we decided to hit the record button this afternoon with a four second delay. It's like when back in the day when CNN used to throw it to Iraq in the nineties and he used to say, okay, Wolf, what's going on and then used to sit there through and then

they would talk. That's what it would be like for every response, right, and you have to do that on on cable news. You have to do nod uh huh you're waiting? Uh yeah. So anyway, it was terrible and I was getting a message saying your WiFi is delayed, your internet's delayed. Well you knew it wasn't my six hudred seventy three dollar equipment over here? Oh whoa did you sell off half of it? No? It wasn't your equipment. It was definitely. So I then had the troubleshoot what

was going on? So Scary says, just close the browser, tried a different browser. So I tried a different browser. Nope, not that didn't fix me. Tried for an hour. Yeah, he says, oh, you know what, a clean rebooting, clean re boo didn't fix it. Clean clean reboot didn't fix anything. Rebooted the router, pushed the button, hit the reset, unplugged it for a minute, did all the things Verizon is gonna tell me to do? I did? So do you want the whole story now? No, let's let's save part

two for the rant. That's what I'll say. The lack of doing the show at two o'clock gave put me into a spiral, a rabbit hole that the whole time I'm going this is content. So I didn't have a rant, but I have a rant now, yes, And so thankfully we're doing the podcast later this evening here, so Brodie could get screwed. Brody got fucked. That's in the five hours, and he has a rant for later on. And yeah, I want to know why I can't walk around with

a child world t shirt child World. Remember the beach, Remember remember the beach? In New Jersey. No, no, no, no, no, no, none of them. No. In North Jersey and in the Tri state area, there used to be a regional toys to or called child World, and they used to have a jingle that's it, child World, child World, everything a toy store should be. Yes, I remember that. It was like kind of like toys as then it was Kaby Toys,

and then it was child World. It was like which is why they were out of business, by the way. So in fact, a little toy stores pretty much are so you know, basically it was like a you know, a panda and all that stuff. So you want to you want a retro shirt. Bumbled upon a website which, as we should we have a sponsored world dot com because that's dangerous. I was on, I was on a vintage T shirt exactly where you were going with the

prody and I ordered this shirt. Okay, I ordered It was a blue It's a nice light blue sky blue shirt with the old school eighties child World, the toy supermarket logo on it. I buy the shirt online and it gets sent to my house and I start waxing

nostalgic about it, right, I'm like, yeah, old school. And then I realized, oh good, I can't really wear this anywhere because if people don't get the joke, if people don't get that, oh my god, that's cool, that was like that old school brand from the eighties and nineties, then they're gonna look at me like I'm some fucking freak so or a representative from Florida. So I tried

to Uh yeah, I wore it to work. I weren't to work yesterday, but I wore it to the radio station, and I did get a couple of like weird looks kind of people look at the side. I anyway, we didn't talk about it on the air, but I'm going to dress it right here. If it's for the sake of nostalgia, if it's if it's an old school logo with an old school print on it and it happens to be called child World, the Toy the Toys Supermarket, why is that a bad thing? Okay? Does the shirt

say child World Toy Store. It says the World the Toy Supermarket. It says child World the Toy Supermarket. It's the full logo of what it was now again, you may not know what child World is or what is again terrible name. Probably they would have changed it by now if they still exist, the world child World. Yeah, but there's a lot of those brands and a lot of those things that existed regionally, Like we had these

things places called corvettes. We had places department stores, department stores. Yeah, everybody knows the kaldor Bradley's. These are by the way, I bought all the shirts. I brought all of them on this one website. It's all right, So you're you're living in the in the eighties with brands that are regional. It's it's not ironic. It's I got an Entimate T shirt because that's okay, fine, I was gonna buy a Crazy Eddie shirt. You know they have the prices are insane.

So yeah, Crazy Eddies was a legendary electronics store in this area. Anyway, here's what I would say about child World. Please, you can't take that risk because it sounds like like if you went to Okay, let me ask you a question, if you went to Plant World, what would you expect them to sell weed? Alright, plants though, plants, of course. Yeah, if you went to Dog world. They'd be selling dogs. I see where you're going with this. You're going to

child world. You're buying children on the black market. Like, that's the terrible name. And if like it looks like you know what it sounds like, if you don't know it's a toy store. I'd look at that shirt and think it was like supposed to be a funny attempt that here's a store where you can buy children. Oh, you can buy kids in the store. It's like, I get it. It's a pun. That's why they were in stock.

And they weren't sold out like the crazy Eddie Shore who was because nobody but I was the only one who bought it. Oh no, there's a couple of guys with vans down by the river right now. But they didn't. Yeah, for other reasons. I actually am. I'm innocent about it, and I just don't God, see, how do I get

myself into this ship? See now here? I was thinking I was going to show up at the bars this summer with an ironic sort of not it's not even ironic, it's the wrong word, but like a nostalgic graphic t where somebody in the crowd might be like, look, at that. I remember that. Oh scary, look at that old shirt. You can't do that. No, you can't show up to a bar of adults with a Child World shirt. Yeah, you certainly can't go near a school. But but did you wear it with your trench coat? This? It match

this print? Brody has I'm gonna I'm I'll post a picture of it later. No, actually you shouldn't know, because then the Internet's gonna cancel me. Damn I can't. God, damn it. I can't even show it anyway. It's it's innocent. A right would be making but they wouldn't be making it if it was for any other reason. It's just, you know, we all like to go into our past. Yeah, but you don't. You don't, Okay, but you can't. No, it's terrible. No child alright, I've got just got another

sleep shirt. So thanks, you're gonna You're gonna sleep in your Child World shirt. No one's gonna see me. That's the point. Sleep shirts are just for me. Yeah, Michael Jackson like sleep shirt, dude, come on a sleep shoot at donald Get Yeah. When I know I wear T shirts at night underwear you have unders. No one sees the shirt but me. That's my point, and this shirt will never see the light of day period. I'm not gonna I'm not gonna wear it anywhere, you know, only

for myself at night. What am I gonna do? Throw it away? I mean, you definitely can't sk your own d wearing that shirt. That's just that's terrible. I'm just saying, Brodie, you know you're being disgusting. Now, You're not a path No, I'm just hearing that. Why didn't you think about it before you bought the shirt? I didn't because you don't want because my money doesn't go there. Because I'm actually pretty pure about that. You know what I'm saying. Did

you also like a girl Scout shirt? No? Dude, come on, you know what I'm saying. It's I'm innocent. That's why I bought it because I don't think the way I probably should. I'm innocent. Also, I just think you're asking for trouble. Yeah, all right, well, I'm not gonna well forget it and I'm retiring the shirt, but you know the rest will live on, you know. All right? Well, I gotta m AFU now I need your opinion on something,

so I'm gonna give credit where credit is due. I told you I'm a big fan of a New York radio show on w f A and Carton and Roberts. Craig Carton, Evan Roberts. You give them credit. I've mentioned them before on this podcast. They had a conversation yesterday. They got me very got me irked. But before I

tell you the conversation scary. You know those people that when you're on an exit to a parkway, right, Let's say you're like eighth in line, seventh in line, and then that car comes in at the right, at the end, it right at the exit, chisel they chisel in. Okay, what if the second car in line decides they're gonna let that car go ahead of them? Does that second car have the right to do that? No, it doesn't, right, because they're speaking for the entire parkway right, they're letting.

But if the chisel er chiseled his way and then the second car just backed off because they don't want to they don't want to get to an accident, then I can understand. Because sometimes I wanted to get you on the record on chiselers before I give you this conversation, because I'm pretty sure I know what you're gonna say. So, Craig Carton says, he is this great idea, right, great idea for when you're at like a concert or a

sporting event and it's a really long line. He says, you go up to the second person in line, because don't do this if the line is not that long. But if the line is really long, you go up to the second person and you say, hey, man, if you could just add on a couple of things for me, like a beer and some fries or hot dog whatever, I'll pay for your food in mine. He said. It works every time. The guy, the guy on online of the woman will always say that, oh, you're buying my food.

No problem. You give him like forty bucks whatever. They buy your food. Also when they go up and then you don't have to wait online and it costs your money, but you have to wait online paying for access, which is I see no problem with you, don't. You don't see that as chisel that's not a chiseler. Why because the person, the second person in line, the second person in line, is going to give the order all at once. It's gonna be one transaction and that's the end of it.

It's not two transactions. It's one. Yeah, but what if they order a popcorn and it has to be microwaved. What if they order a condition has to be microwaved that they weren't gonna order. What if they wanted a beer and then the beer tap runs out, they gotta change the beer tap. It's gonna take at least an extra minute or two to get whatever food. That's where I did well, that's where I have to disagree with my own statement from before. I think that there's nothing

wrong with that. I think it's clever. And I think if you're smart enough to think about it, and you have the money to pay for it, and you feel like you want to reach into your pocket and do it and it's a nice gesture, I think you have every right to do it. And I disagree completely because you for it. That's why you know, you've you've you. That's not now I would if I didn't want to wait a line and and nobody else was offended. Let

me ask you this scary. Let's say you're the guy third in line, right, You've waited forty minutes to get to that point. Now, the guy in front of you was making a profit and slowing you down more. You're not bothered at all. You have no problem with it. As the third guy in line, I had a problem with it. But I have to sit there and eat my words. I have to take it. I have to take it because because somebody came and you know, outsmarted me. Sometimes sometimes you use, sometimes you lose. And if I

was third in line, I would have been a loser. Well, if I was third in line, I would have said, pay for half my food. I'll do it for less. You know who did this? The guy in front of me do this? Last week? Um Our producer Sam's boyfriend William. You know, big buff William William in the sauna with sauna William that he worked me out in the saunas did uh? You know he's a physically fit guy. Um They were saying. Sam was waiting to get into the nightclub.

She gets in the club, but then she's you know, but but William hadn't entered yet. He was all the way in the back and he wanted to get some food, but the line was long. So she sees at the corner of her eye he's buying five slices of pizza. Five slices of pizza. All the way out because give me a line. There's a line for the club and then in the and then you know, several feet beyond that is an open food court for anybody to get pizza. Okay, let me just set that up for you. That's the

death Jenkinson's in Point Pleasant Beach, not a sponsor. So so he didn't he didn't do the pizza walking, did he. No, he didn't. One better, So she's like, why is he buying five slices of pizza for himself? It's just for himself. He would never do that. He didn't, you know what

he did. No, he wanted to slice of pizza. He legit went cut the line all the way to the front and and just whispered to the person, Hey, I'm gonna give you the slice of pizza if you you know, let me you know, cut you or something like that, or you and your group of people here because you

wrote extra pizza for people bought. He bought three extra slices for the p for the group of people that were like right in front, and he handed it to them as if he was part of the group that he was walking back, so to them they knew he was a line cutter. Right, they're getting free food out of it, and he said it low enough for them to you understand what saying for them to be you're part of our group. So when will you walk up and start saying talking to the guy like he's your buddy.

Everything you have everyone in back, all the people that were waiting on line to get into the club, they got fucked. They got fucked, but they didn't know they got fucked because they thought, oh, he was the he was the fifth friend that decided to go get pizza, and now he's bringing it back to them. He's with that group and no one, no one called him out for it, and he got away with it and it

cost him three exercises. So is that wrong? Okay, well, before I answer that question, let me go back to the Parkway by Sam was already in the club and witness the entire thing. I was like, holy sh it, that was genius. We should be talking about that on the radio. But here's the thing. Let me go back to the car chiseling in at the exit. Okay, Let's say the guy rolls down his window in his BMW and he says to the guy, because that's to those

people you know. He says to the guy in the ford, Hey, man, can you let me in? I'll give you I'll give you ten bucks, and he throws the ten dollars into the guy's call window and the guy lets him in for ten bucks. Now it's the same situation. Now, is it okay to chisel in? Oh your fad, get ahead, get head ahead. It's not ah okay. Oh so what if we're The guy in the BMW was like, Mike, Mike, Oh my god, I haven't seeing you in a while. I love your new Ford, Mikey babes, let me get

in front of you, Mike. And the guy in the Ford's like, oh yeah, alright, Tony, give me ten bucks. They're like oh yeah, and he cut some cut in. That's fine then, right, Yeah, it's about the Benjamin's or the pizza. Yeah, that's not okay either. That's why I set you up at the traffic scenario first, because I know the way your mind works. You love cutting lines, you love the belt. We all do. We all love cutting lines. We all love access, don't we like access?

I like access. When it's like, hey, you guys work on the radio, we'd love to have you come in the club. That's not cutting anybody, that's just giving you, letting you in in addition everybody else. But that's different than cutting in. I've never chisel in the parkway, never chisel. I'm a no chat and I I'm the guy. I'm the guy who who like rides the bumper the guy in front of him. Okay, you are not getting in getting Look you are not getting I don't even look

at them. What if you're at home? I love I love the William pizza thing is that it's brilliant. It's brilliant. What I don't think it's nice. What if you're okay? What if you're eating pizza, speaking of pizza, and you're sitting at home and you're waiting for your pizza to get there okay from slice, and you know he wanted to get there extra quickly to make sure your pie is hot. I feel like this analogy is gonna be terrible.

And he did, he did, he did the chisel. Would you be okay if you were on the receiving end of hot pizza from your favorite local pizzeria? Do I know eachise me and say said to you, I chiseled my way into a line because Otherwise you wouldn't have gotten this pie for an extra ten minutes and it would have been cold. Would you, as the recipient of the pizza, wait, who paid for that pie? You'd be able because I'll tell you what, what about the guys that that had to wait that much longer on the

on the exit? Who maybe we're on the way to watch the birth of their child or their favorite TV show and they don't have a DVR or their wife told him the next time you're late, that's it. You're sleeping on the couch. Right, You never know what those people will late. The people at Chisel Scary think that their life is more important than everybody. Whatever's in their mind. I go, oh, I gotta Chisel because I got a blah blah blah blah blah. They are They are egotistical

enough to not care about other human beings. All right, we were talking about Slice, so we might as well talk about Slice. Because Pizza Republic is a local pizza spot by me and I ordered. I ordered a rice ball. They have two types of rice balls there. They got the one one of my food yesterday now I'm hungering. No, they got I got the rice ball with the meat and peas which is the classic Sicilian. Pick those peas out,

and then I have a cheese rice ball. Uh. And then I got a chicken millonnaise which is waiting for me, and two slices just because. The best part about Slice they literally work with the local pizza person. They've saved pizza people two fifty million dollars in fees. This is supporting list on your order. Yes, this is supporting local. This is supporting small businesses because all these pizzai is they don't have their own apps. They can't do it,

so they link up with Slice. That helps them compete with big boys you know that are in town. Scary. Not only do they help the little guy by giving them the technology of a big guy, they don't charge them exorbitant fees. That's the real thing. They give them the service and they charge a minuscule amount of money for these pizza places to have the technology so that pain in the butt me can place the customized order

through the app and not annoy the people. That's that's the real The real thing is they're not getting me annoying them, and they're not paying a lot of money for it. You could take five days in a week and order from five different local pizza shops, and each time you order you get another pizza point. You get eight pizza points, five pie bam. I couldn't wait. I couldn't wait for you to say it. So you're earning pizza.

You're earning. And right now, if your first time ordering through Slice, you can get five dollars off, just just code word Brooklyn right, new customers, five dollars off your first order. But here's the thing. You have a spouse, someone you're dating, get them and download the app even though you have it, and then use their five dollars you got. I see a pattern developing here. I see

a way to get more five dollar coupons. You know what you do, Go and to work, have somebody at work, A couple of people that work download for them on their phones, and then they can get five dollars off and buy you lunch. How about that? How about that? More info is at Slice life dot com with Body and scary Um. We always do that together, you know. After a commercial breakople, ma'am, I want to play sound if that's okay. But I also want to talk about horoscopes.

It's about her scopes for a second. You know, I'm not a fan of her scopes, neither of mine. Look, if you believe in them, that's fine. You you be you, not you you slices. If you guys believe in her scopes, you be you? Okay, you do you Me personally, I'm not a fan of someone who writes for a newspaper or website writing horoscopes and determining how my day is. Right. Oh, you're gonna make a new friend today. You don't know that. You know you. If you knew me, you know I'm

not making new friends. So where I was born? Who? You can't tell me my day based on what day I was born? So many years, a lot of times. They're written in generalities, generalities, up against the wall. Oh you might make some money, an opportunity is gonna arise. Don't look at gift horse in the mouth. Be careful how you walk today. Uh, you might get a new project at work. Somebody's gonna call you and you go, oh my god. Three of the seven things were so me.

It's perfect again. So somebody raised an interesting question that I'm surprised no one has ever brought up before. So here's what the text message said, I have a question, where do you get your horoscopes from? If you go online and ask for daily horoscopes, every horoscope for today is different. Why is that? In other words, the morning show horoscopes aren't the same as the New York Posts horoscopes or horrorscope dot com or your Daily Horoscope dot

org or whatever. They're not to say why, So I wrote back, you want the real answer. They're written by humans, random generalities that randomly seem to be talking right to you. So they wrote back, I just find it odd that they write different hortorscopes for the same day, but yet people can't miss them. The people love their right, so I said again, it's people who get paid to make them up all over the world. They aren't based on anything,

just random words thrown together. It's not like you have uh astrology experts in the Oklahoma Gazette where they're like looking at the maps and the charts and they they put some ship together on Tuesday that very easily could have been Thursday. They tell Aquarius stuff they very easily could have told Pisces. It's not a thing. It's not now. Look, if you go to somebody that you believe. As an expert and a fortune teller, I'm not gonna get into

that somebody who could read my palm it looked. I'm not gonna tell you that every higher power it does. I'm a skeptic, but if it works for you, it works for you. I'm only a dry sing written horoscopes. Okay. It's people that read tarot cards. There are people that read these lifelines. They look a look at different, They look at the creases in your in your hand. These people are onto something else which could which may or

may not be a scam as well. You know, if you listen, listen when when my parents went to a fortune teller before I was born, they did it like, oh that's a goof. They were out another couple. They were like, let's go to fun tell right. The woman said to my mother, you're gonna you're gonna have a child. You're gonna have a son. She wasn't pregnant, Okay. I told my father, you're expecting news about a new job. Okay.

Like a couple of weeks later, my mother found out she was pregnant with me, and my father found out he was going to be a police officer. Now you can tell everybody, oh my god, this woman was you know, had amazing powers, or you can go that's random. You saw a young couple come in. They're probably at the age we're gonna try to have kids like you can an. I don't look, I don't know. I don't know the woman.

The reason is sometimes they're right. The reason as far as her scopes go, they're all different because so the person wrote back, thank you for responding. I get it. Now. There's a common thing here, though, Brodie. That the reason why I bring up tarot cards and fortune telling, Tarot cards, tarot cards, fortune telling and reading your your your lifelines and all and like, and horror scopes, all of it together has one thing in common. It it's something for

people to believe in. People want to believe in something. Brett Michael's yeah, because I get something to believe thank you, poison poison. But Brett Michaels, my my, So that was my larger point when you bring up her scopes to me, it all falls in this world of I'm not saying tomfoolery or trickery or random thought nous, whatever I'm saying it it falls into you. It lies with the people that believe people. And that's why I'm saying, if you look,

you can believe in whatever you want. You can believe in hard scope. If you're a slice, you're going, hey, Brodie, what the fuck? No? No, no, no, That's what I'm saying. You can believe in it. All I'm saying is this is the first person in all of my years of reading text messages and emails and being alive, no one has ever asked why they don't all match, right, Like, why does one say you should get an adventure today

and one says you should be cautious today? Because right because of the random randomness of it, because it different people are just writing them. I love how. By the way, uh, nobody calls me all day. I've said this once before and nobody texts me. Nobody calls me. And now here we are about forty minutes into this podcast, and I've gotten about seventeen texts from different people. My phone is ringing off the hook right now. Look what is so important?

I told everybody, Hey, I'm recording a Brooken Boys podcast. But obviously they don't want me to do this podcast for some reason. They're like, you know what, go another week without doing a podcast. So here's an old trick. When you're on hold with a company for a long time, and it happened again today. When you're on hold and like we'll wait with your momentarily, it calls very important, sit down on the toilet, start peeing. They will pick

up almost every time. Oh yeah, it's like like like you're peeing right, like hello, So like you gotta hit the mute button, cut the stream off. So I try to remember to put it on mute when I'm gonna go to the bathroom because I know they're gonna pick up. They're absolutely gonna pick up. That's that's the way the world works. But that's not horoscopes. That's just that's just bad luck. Yeah, it really is. All right, well, we'll can wrap that conversation up because I think we're gonna

have people that are really piste off at us. All right, so we play some sound. We should change the subject for that. I have a little bit of a surprise. Oh little surprised will throw throw a little wrench in the works here. Okay, I didn't we didn't plan this, Well you didn't plan this, But who's on the phone, say hi to my other podcast? Host Cheryl, what are you doing? What's up? Well, I'm doing a podcast and my boy, he didn't mention, he was putting more on.

That's terrific, you know, because we're kind of like, you know, we're kind of like work together, but we don't work together. Right. We got these two podcasts with Mr Terry Jones over here, and we never get to talk anymore if you're familiar, But everyone listening and watching the Speaking Volumes podcast with Share and Scary, where we you know, we talk about

lifestyle and uh fun pop culture things as well. Um, but you know, it's not just every day that I say, let's do a little cross promote here, but today's a special day. And I shared Brody, do you hear how giddy Share is. She's got so much excitement in her voice, and they give you a backstory before you tell everybody why she's excited. I remembered earlier, earlier, today, I remembered that Share had a reason to be excited, and I texted her, I said, hey, can you remind me the details?

I want to help promote it. You got a big day coming up. She was like, how did you even remember? How don't you remember that? And I said, well, unlike unlike some people I care about a lot of times musicians, We've been texting all day today. Yeah, we've been texting all day. You have been Honestly, I haven't even gotten a chance to see Brody in forever because do you

remember Scary when we had our old podcast. I got to spend time down at the studio when we were doing it down there, showy, hold on, let's promote that the fair show also here on the brook and Boys channel before episode zero. Feel free to binge those we they count toward our number, don't they, Brodie? They do. That was with the Jersey Kid t and uh and Share and mice and and me and uh yes, so right, so so so Share is here. It's to wait a second.

So I'm actually helping to contribute to the Brooklyn Boys. So I have to get some love from your people over there over to our speak volumes, Arry, I mean, what the hell right? And you know what, the same way Brodie brings people over to Walkers and talkers, we can bring people over to our But for today, this is like when an artist comes into the studio and Elvis always says, you have new music coming out tomorrow. It's like you're giving birth. So Share is about to

give birth again. Why don't you tell everybody what's happening. Well, I am happy to announce that I'm back on the big screen tomorrow. We got a theatrical release and go O D for Death in Texas. So I start in a movie that comes back tomorrow with Brucen Darn Award winning Darn, the Little Star Wars character played by Laura Dern that crazy s from Avatar. From Avatar, Lara Flynn Boyle from the Practice, From the Practice, Lara Flynn, you're talking.

This is an awesome path. I mean, I want to tell you they were not only great to just work with, but great to get to know. It was a wonderful experience. But the movie is called Death and Texas, written button directed by Scott wind Powser who did Hurricane Heist and

a bunch of other movies that you guys have probably seen. Um. But my character in this is Jennifer, and you guys are gonna fall in love with Jennifer because Jennifer is just like multidimensional character and the thing I loved about this role with that I got a huge range of emotion to carry, and that's something that you don't always get. You know, a lot of times, it's very fun. It's important by it's important to note here that and Shares

not doing this justice. She's in the entire film and she she does seem Bruce dern are in there for she's actually in this and it's this is a film that's in theaters and also at midnight tonight will be on demand on your TV. And hold on, you got to give the date. It's Janue's to June three, as we're reporting fourth midnight death in Texas. I also hear there's a shot of you in very tight shorts bending over the bar, because oh there's some there's some major

wardrobe outfittinnis. And let me tell you something. I have to have to share this. I am all boomed and butt out in a lot of these shots, and it's just it's just adds to the taste. And I heard there was a picture of you floating around the internet. Well you're not exposed, is that true? Yeah, that's that. Yeah, that's true. I am not exposed in the texture. It's not because that's not really what the story is about.

But you know what at dealing with the car Pal. Okay, in this movie, you ready for this, the car Pal runs the Mexican guest. Yes, el Paso. We're talking at El Paso. That they went to shoot this film in El Paso. She was gone for a year. I was. We were down and we were down in New Mexico for a very long time, right before the pandemic. That's when we stopped. Yes, well we were, yeah, we were in also right and we were also but we were also in um the bar scenes and all the rest

of those actually happening in Las Cruises. I don't know if you guys know where that is Mexican And yeah, that's New Mexico. And we had yeah, and we had and we had El Paso. And look, the film is called Death in Texas. They wanted authentic, we got even authentic.

This wasn't shot in some studio in l A. I just want to point out that Scary's co host for his other podcast, Speaking Volumes, is now in a in a movie with Bruce Stern and Lara Flynn Boyle and a lot of this Okay, it's even like yes starring. I would like to take this opportunity to point out that. My other podcast, Walkers and Talkers, my co host Jamie, produces a morning show that plays Christmas music from October to January. Okay, so I also have something to brag

about Christmas music. So listen, I gotta tell you, guys, I shouldn't be happier to come on here. I was doing a ton of R today and I was waiting waiting for this podcast because to me, Brooklyn Boys is another little source of my life over here. Like I feel like you guys are like an extension of like like freaking volumes. Right. Okay, so when when you go

up for the Golden Globe right to get the podcast? No, no, no, it would be great if you had like two thugs with you from Brooklyn to like walk up with you or maybe like our fault water shirt, you know, to the awards ceremony. Oh my god, oh my god. Well listen, I hear you guys have a peril. Maybe you should just start sending me a pail, start wearing it on some of Yeah, if you want to, If you want to get someone, we'll send you some shirts. You can

cut them up and show them the boobs. Yeah, yeah, exactly, exactly, will make them sort and like cute and stuff, and yeah, I mean I may actually stay up till midnight and order it for twelve dollars on demand because I do have it on FiOS here and I will watch Death in Texas is scary. Send me the log in. Once you do that, you're not gonna pay. You're not gonna pay. You gotta pay free ro share, did you hear? Wait a minute, shirt share just as for free merchandise. I

gotta pay for the movie. Yes you do. You're supporting a friend. Wait a minute. We just gave her a lot more than twelve dollars in promotion. I gotta get a happy come on, Hold on a second, Hold on a second. Oh, in promotion you mean in this yes, I'm gonna do social media. Yeah, my buddy, I'm giving you free social media. You're right, You're right, you are? You are? It was like really good to text with you today too. I mean, that's kind of like a

quality day today. I got to text with Brody today and I was like, really, you're gonna promote this was freaking obs right. Plus the film. Once I get a link for the download from you, I can then talk about how great the movie was even though I already know it's gonna be great, I am dumbfounded. Scary made it sound like, oh yeah, she's in this thing with this is the real deal. Now these are people with stars.

She's in the trailer three times in the trailer for the film, I'll tell you something, you guys are gonna love the characters to because it actually holds together the whole movie. So without realizing it, Jenna for literally is the source of giving everybody the information as the movie goes along, and it actually helps you follow the whole story. So the hard work kills people like we're spoilers here. Remember the movie comes out not kills people like that.

But I gets to be kicking ass in it. I get to be romantic in it, be showy in it, I get to be sassy in it, and then I get can navigate the dark borders of the El Paso underworld nice and again. The name of the movie is Death and Taxes. No, no, no, it's death in Texas, the only two things you can count on, right, Death and taxes. No. Was that done on purpose, by the way, like as a play on words. Yeah, right now, let's just let's just talk about me and shorts shorts again.

I think we could just go back to boot shorts anyway, all right, and Starry come on that. I can hear it in your voice. You're gonna be up all night. You're not sleeping. UM, check it out. Support our Share. You've got to see Share Deathly Texas. It's definitely in your on demand. It's also in some theaters around the country. And based on the way she described her outfit, you can watch it with the sound off. Yes you can,

she tells Jennifer Volumes. Jennifer the speaking, no volume. Just put a piece of paper over the scariest part of the screen. He's awful, He's awful. Share. Um, Yes, but please do death in Texas. Uh and and I. We're gonna let you go for here from here. Share, but we love you so much. Appreciate a guy. Congratulations to

thank you for being so supportive. Thank you to all your fans for caring and follow me on my Instagram at share to sendza and you guys get to see some behind the scenes and some s E n Z A and some behind not castanza not castanza. You could just look in the credits. I'm like, you know at the top right and they've just searched for Speaking Volumes podcast to see her name there. If you forget there's that well back this podcast stuff. I just spelled it. Yeah,

you're welcome, Shake tonight. It's really great talking to you. Wow burn in Texas. That's a boy. That's awesome. Brody, you know it really fucking is awesome. I mean all jokes aside. I mean, I know we we sometimes we ham things up a little bit, like, oh my, he's our buddy, he's got a huge thing, huge role. She's not. This isn't you know. It's not an extra so so and it's and it's a feature film. It's an actually wide release. Um alright. So with that said, sound do

some sound. And then I also want to talk to you about my friend, our friend, Anthony Roda, who is on our podcast. Now. I un uncovered something big, uncork something I may have I may have unleashed the kracking. There's something big is going on, and I gotta tell you about that. So the first thing I have here is bad seventies DJ okay. So everybody, by the way, I posted on our Instagram on my Instagram at David Brody the commercial of Oh My Right the monoclonal antibodies

right what she calls her aunt. Oh my. When you see the commercial at David Brodie, it's even worse to hear it because she hangs up on her aunt. She goes for a run on the beach with her dog. She didn't give a shit about her aunt. Her aunt's dead, her aunt is you watched the commercial. There's no way

the aunt's gonna call her doctor anyway. People were commenting how much not only they love that, but they love oh my, and they and they love um Katie, Katie, Babs Katie, I gotta request that, says, we gotta do that every show. Yeah, so okay, So, uh you know, I've talked about having satellite radio in my car, and I was flipping around, as they call it, the channels, and uh, if you, if you, if you go to

like channel five, it's the fifties. Channel six is the sixties, seven and seventies, eighties and eighties, nine is the nineties and whatever. So here and and I hit on channel seven for the seventies al right now. I like seventies music occasionally, so I stopped to listen for a second. And this guy, I want you, he's making a joke. Okay, he makes the joke, and then then he kind of like takes credit for the joke, as if he just

made a brilliant joke. So I want you to hear the clip and tell me what the funk he's talking about made up? Okay, hold on, stop? Oh wait wait wait wait wait. First of all, we mean to tell the audience this. Yeah, most of the most of the people on this channel and all the rest are voice tracked. They are they are prerecorded, which also means this guy had a chance to do this all over and he chose to say, you know what, fuck it, I'm gonna

play it. That's terrible if I did that, Because I can understand if if you're live and some it comes out wrong and it doesn't make any sense, you go with it. But unless that was live, and a lot of them are not, most of them, I can't. I can't promise you that that wasn't live. But of the stuff that they do or voice tracked me, and they do it way in advance, right, That means this guy

thought that that was awesome and he left it that way. No, and then he followed it up with I just came up with that like top of my head, I got I gotta hear that again. Serious seven by Manlode that up. Oh my god. But you know what, and it wasn't a Jennifer Lopez song. He had no reason to mention Jennival Lopez fanolo of Janolo and j Lo. You know what he did, j Lo ja and oh like Manilo, you're a fan of Barry Manilo. You're that, we know. But if you're a Jannalo, you're a fan of Jennival

Lopez and Barry Manlo. Right, but he was going into a Barry Manilow song. By the way, he hit the post, so he gets a point for that. Well, you know why I hit the post. By the way, hitting the post means you stopped talking at the exact second the lyrics start. That's like a big accomplishment in radio. That's but if you're live, it's an accomplishment. If you're pre recording it, you just lay your voice down when you line it up, line it up with the track. So

that okay. So now so you have the the other clip of um Nirvana, I want to play that next. I do not I have I don't see Nirvana. I see David Cross Yeah, David Cross. Okay, I love David Cross. David Cross is one of the funniest people on television. He was on Arrested Development, The Man Show, Brilliant, brilliant, funny man. Okay, he did The Man Show. It Bob oden Kirk, who we we've talked about. He was in the movie Nobody. Recently, David Cross got fucked by somebody

on this countdown show for Amorial Day weekend. So, and what's what's doesn't make any sense to me is he gets the song wrong, but it's all prerecorded, right, So what happens is you go into a studio. You don't sit there for six hours. When the music counts down, you go in, you record all the intros, you record everything, and then somebody in post production assembles it all later they all shuffle it together. So you go and you go. That was number one, one hundred, Hey, that was number

seventy five, coming up a number fifty. Right, It's like the VJs and MTV. They don't stand there and watch the videos. They record all the intros and outros and then so many places and in there mind blown today years old when you learned that. So I'm gonna play this for you. I'm gonna rip it apart, and then I'm gonna tell you why it's even worse. So here's David Cross. You guys all know the song that's playing.

Listen to the song he says it is, and then listen to the song, and then what he says about that song and where he thinks it should have been in the countdown. So he's backtracking Song A hundred third eye Blind. Hey, I'm comedian actor David Kross. He probably know me as Tobias from Arrested Development or not. This is Lithium's listener voted top one under countdown all Memorial Day weekend. We're going to be doing this. That was

smells like Teen Spirit by Nirvana, number one hundred. I would have I would have put them a little higher, but you guys voted, and this is what you had to say. And I'm interested to see what's number one. I thought that would be number one, but somebody took the track in the wrong place. No no, well here's no no, no, they didn't put the track in the wrong place, so they told him or whatever the case. He says, that was song a hundred smells like Team Spirit, right,

did they play the wrong song? Well, let me let me get to this. So then he says, God, now that this is the Alt Countdown, all alt rock, so being in its alt rock, he goes, wow, number a hundred. I would have thought smells like teen Spirit would have been number one. Huh, but you guys voted, so what do I know? Right? So I kept listening to the countdown about twenty five minutes later because he didn't do

a lot of intros. A lot of times they'll just have a sweeper where like the voice goes seventy six and then and nobody intows it right because the guy hosting the countdown really only talks about like twenties songs out of a hundred. The rest of them, they give me the impression he's there and they go that was you know, here's whatever this whatever song is, right, it's just a way of them piecing it all together somewhere around like song seventy He goes, hey, I just want

to correct something I've been told that. Uh I said it was Nirvana, but it was Third Eye Blind. Uh, sorry about that something like that. He made like an apology, right, right, Nirvana, that's very good. I see the number one song on the countdown actually was smells like teen Spirit. But here's the thing, it's not live, right, And so he says that was smells like teen Spirit, but it wasn't. Then later on in the countdown he says, hey, I just

want to correct myself. I said it was smells like teen Spirit, but it was semi chalm life by third Eye Blind. So did they go in and make him re record the change? Like? I don't understand. If it's not live, that's it's live. Somebody would have told him, hey, man, it's live. You messed. You knew about the error. Then why did they just delete that track and just play one of those numbers? Why did they even have to have him? They're saying the wrong thing to begin with.

If it was prerecorded, Yeah, Brodie, that's weird. I can't figure that out. All right, all right, let's play the next audio clip. What do you have? I have a narcoleptic? Oh okay, So on the on the radio today on the other strad morning show, you did you were talking about narcleptic, but you did not say narcoleptic, narcolepsy. Nope, what did I say? Play the clip? Narc electric or something you said narcolectic be an arc electric or something?

Oh yeah, eclectic. You know I meant narcoleptic. I know what you meant. I just was like for you, I love it. I love it when Brodie Brodie stands there with a bullhorn amplifying it. Every mistake. For it was one mistake. I never I would never make like two mistakes and point out two mistakes. It was one. Play the clip, the have the elephant clip? Will you play

you have the elephantlip? All right? So now on the fifty minute Morning Show podcast, you prove to me that you don't listen to this podcast because you made a mistake. We always talk about I should have said, I want to tell you, right, I should have said no, no, no, no, play the clip, not that I would have a point

out two of your mistakes. But go ahead. You're you're about to point out three elephant in the room or it's actually not at the pound gorilla, or no, it's also the elephant in the corner, elephant in the room or Okay. So the expression is like, what is the thing, the big obvious thing we're not addressing, right, We're not talking about the gorilla or the elephant in the room a pink elephant. We've talked about this when you're drunk is when you're drunk, you hallucinate and you see a

pink elephant. It's a cliche like, oh seeing pink. All right, So I got that wrong. But you've heard, we've talked about it on the podcast. But you wouldn't point out three of my errors in a row. No, I would never. That's why we're going to take it to this next clip where he corrects me. Yeah, here we go. No, I wouldn't. All right, So me and my Brooklyn friends we do this bok. I know it's my Brooklyn friends

and I. But here's the thing. I don't get, like, you speak really well, but every time you talk about your Brooklyn friends on the air, you say me and my Brooklyn friends. It's the only time you do that. So that's three in a row. Now you have a fourth clip. What else you're gonna correct? No, No, that's it. I wasn't correcting you. I just wanted to know why the only time you make that mistake is when you say me and my Brooklyn friends. Is that because you're

trying to Brooklyn? Probably? All right? I remember, as I said, on the other this morning, A classic line, I speak common man. Well yeah, clearly, yeah? What else he got there? I gotta got a couple more clips. That's all I have. I have those five. Oh know what? Nothing else? That is all I do. Have a commercial break, so we'll be right back after this. We could say that you want to say that, all right, I did you just did? Okay, great podcast, and Rody, I'm sitting here with well hold

on to remind myself of this. I have four pistachio nuts. Okay, um sitting in front of me. Were they in the couch? What do you find four postessio nuts? This is a reminder for me tell the podcast, to tell everybody listening to the podcast, all the slices. Do not pie pistachio nuts in the shell? Why? Because there's always several of them? Oh that are that? You know? How? You have to you have to peel the like they have the two edges. They have no openings. There's no openings. It's just I

have four whole nuts. So I have to actually hit him with a hammer to open them up to get the statos out of them. No, you don't. You put them between your teeth, your back teeth with the crease up and down the tep of the crease. You need right now is a trip to the dentist this week, you big wos. Seriously, but anyway, get the shelled pistachios. You can't get the shell because then you eat them like like a gavone. You eat them like and the bag is gone. You need the shells to slow you

down the ones in the shell. First of all, you gotta take it. You have to have long enough nails on your thumbs to take your two thumbs and pry open the shells. No, you don't. You use the No, you don't. You use the soft party of thumbs and you push them outward. You can, then you push them out. You don't use your nails. I would think you're an animal. I would think that the free dessert person in you Brody would agree with me. You go back four, you

buy them. You buy them by weight, so the shells way. Yes, if you if you're weighing your stats, come on, and you do at certain stores. If I'm weighing the pistachios, then if it's pure pistachio, then I get all pistachio. I'm paying just for pistachio, but I'm paying for pistachio and shells. If I weigh a pistachio, it's a no win situation. And then you get a handful of them like this that are closed. What the hell do you have to work out it for? I'd rather take handfuls

of it and you shove them down my throat. I would hope a lot of our slices are yelling at their phones right now. You realize the price of unshelled pistachios is not the same price per pound as shelled pistachios with shells on them, not shelled shells. Okay, you don't. You don't pay the same price. It's like if you buy a t bone steak bone steak, you're paying for the bone, but that's factored in a ready to the price. Alright,

So then I guess the challenges. Why don't we unshell up pistachio, weigh the shell and then way the pistachio, and see how much of a difference, how much of a difference it is, and see if you're getting a bigger bargain by buying the weighted pistachios by the shell with shells or shell lists I don't have that kind of time. You dude, You've got time to argue. Oh yeah, yeah with everybody. Come on, look at you. You have

a store you're about to get into. Here. Before you do that, though, UM, I have to bring up one other thing. I gotta get to my Anthony Roda story. Yes do you think no? No, no, no, it's our thing. I have to Yeah, I'd like to know this. Okay, this is something that I mentioned on the Big Show. Um, but we didn't really dive into it. And I usually

bring them up here on the podcast too. I was in North Carolina last weekend with my friends and we went out to a restaurant, and I want to know how you would handle this too, Brodie, because we didn't get your opinion on the air for some reason. Um, I was off last week. That's right, you took a personal week. Oh you don't even really, you don't even hear this. So I didn't hear. Importantly, you didn't get my opinion on the air because Elvis doesn't go to

me all the time. So we were out of a restaurant in Charlotte, North Carolina, at a place called five Church or Fifth and Church, whatever the hell you know what the point is. At the end of the meal, the bill comes and we've all seen extra lines for extra tips, right, we've seen the whole there's a tip line, and then there's the captains to been all this, and dude, here's a new one ready kitchen tip. What there's a

line for kitchen tip. So let's say the bill was a hundred bucks, and then you figure there's a line for tip. You'd put twenty dollars in traditionally, and then there's another line before it's his total, that's his kitchen tip. I'm like, turn to my friends, but what the fund is this pandemic? The kid no, no, because certain certain, no, No, that would be a built in charge. It'll say COVID charge because I've seen that on bills before, on a lot of bills, trying to say like help out the

kitchen staff because times are tough. No, no, so they said to me. So I went over to the waitress. I said, hey, so what is this extra line for tip? What is the kitchen tip? And she goes, oh, that's a nod to the chef, a nod to the sucking

chef gets a tip. Now chef gets apparently it's customary in Charlotte, or at least this restaurant and Charlotte, that if you eat the food and you love the food so much, that you should not only pay for great service, but you should also evaluate how great the food was, and you should tip the chef. How do you feel about that? Not tipping the chef to the chef the chef went to killinary school to make a full salary.

The reason you tip the waitresses and waiters is because they're working for minimum like two dollars three dollars an hour, and you're paying them for good service. The chef usually food, they gets a salary, right, am, I wrong? No, he gets a sal is the salary. This is like putting, um, I guess money in the tip jar and the chef tip. But here, okay, here's the thing to wait. So so

so she let me elaborate. She said, um. She continued to say, yeah, we don't split the front of the house, doesn't split the tips with the back of the house. So the people in the kitchen, meaning everyone from the people who wash the dishes and the chefs, the cookline and the sioux chef and everybody in there, the people with the fluorescent lights behind the doors. Do not get their tips. Ship do not have any tips that they get. They don't get a piece of what you. The waitresses

and the bartenders, they don't get tipped out. They don't get tipped out at all. So this is their way of kind of making their way into your bill and and kind of raising their hand and be like hi us to hi. Oh well in that case, no, but I kind of figured that would be your answer. But I felt that so I said, you know what, I gotta give him twenty bucks. What why is you giving this chef twenty bucks? I don't know. It's a kitchen tip. I come over to the table and give you, like

an a pair of teef to start off. I would have no, I would have looked. I would have looked stupid brody. It would have it just said. I would have put a slash there like a sucker. Never mind stupid different s I put Ship. I said, you know, maybe they'll whack up twenty between all them. There's probably twenty people back there. And what about the landlord tip? The guy who owns the building, he provided you an a door to come in, So you didn't give a

landlord tip? No, you know, Brodie, I don't know. I just felt caught off guard. I don't know what to do next time. I'm gonna have to have it planned. Do you do? You tip the coach check girl, if you don't have a coat, you just walk up and five bucks. No, let's turn money around. But I ate the food because I can't take me to fucking steak dinner. But you give this the chef twenty bucks. The entire kitchen staff, they split it. So the guy who had to wash my plate, I mean, no, he has he

has a job. He probably makes I listen, restaurants. I used to work in restaurants. I was telling my kids the other day. When I worked at Chuck E Cheese back in the day, I made three dollars and forty cents an hour. I got a raise to three dollars and forty five cents an hour. I thought it was the greatest thing ever. I went home told my parents. I was like, and then like you you bragged, right, because then like the three forty people, you're like, I

make three five. So I get what it's like to get ship pay for working your ass off doing dishes. So this is uh a major I think to get the music ready. I think the music the music ready. I think that is that's a Southern hospitality, Stamboni. You know what I think. I'll tell you what I think.

So So, I used to work in a shopping mall in Brooklyn King's Plaza, and there was there was a lot of people in that mall that wouldn't tip on larger parties, right, and so at the bottom of every menu it would say eighteen dollar tip added to parties of six or more. This way, like a waiter, a waitress busted their ass for like ten people. They wouldn't get stiffed on a tip, right. I had one guy tell me I got very upset, very upset. I was

the manager at the time. He was throwing a fit in the middle of the dining room and he said, you know they were called He said the establishment was racist. I said, why is that? Why? What's the matter, sir? How can I help you? He said, you gave me this menu because because I'm black, you think we don't tip. And I said, nope, you can look every menu in the restaurant has it at the bottom. I said, terribly sorry, and I explained him. I said, look the kitchen staff,

my half, my my front end staff. Our clientele is very mixed. But the point was he thought that there were different menus for different people. Okay, now I understand where he's coming from, because I think you got a different menu. I think a different receipt. I think you guys came in there like, hey, give me some of that. Those clams, give me some of that. You're like kiming them in your New York accent. So they the old

bait and switch, and they gave me one. They gave they gave you the Yankee tip, the Northeastern that the northerner, the coming the guy coming from the big city, doesn't know any better. We're gonna North Carolina his ass, right, we didn't lose the war. Fuck you, right, And uh, I think they gave you the old Northeastern check where you go, Oh, I guess that's what they do down here. It's like when you go to Europe. You know what that the that is that? Yeah, that's not tax that,

it's it's the it's the ante gratuity rights. The government. The government and insists that you put the VAT on there for tourists, right right, And then they and then they put the VAT on there and then they leave a tip line for you, right, and they put the vat is the tip, that is the tip, right, So

they it's just a way of fooling people. You think that they they said, Hey, here's a bunch of Northerners coming in here, and maybe they'll pay the kitchen tip if we tell them too, because that's what we do here. I don't know. I don't know. I have to look further into this. I will tell you. In all my years of eating, and you know that I eat a lot, I've never seen the words kitchen tip on a on a receipt. Maybe it's something new, and if it is,

maybe we'll adapt. Maybe they don't pay their people in the kitchen properly, and I don't know why that's my problem, but I felt bad, so I gave him extra money. I'm sorry. I did whatever I know I got and Bony whatever, Brodie, you know, if it made someone's day, if you know now, you got scamboni. So I'll tell

you another scamboni. I was watching an old episode of Um Big Bang Theory, one of the greatest shows of all time, and at the end of every episode of Big Bang Theory, UM the writer, creator of Big Bang Theory and Two and a Half Man and a whole bunch of other shows. I forget his name at the moment,

don't tweet me. And uh so, what he would do is he would write a vanity card at the end, so it would say it would say like he would like ramble on for like ten minutes about something right, like like a couple of paragraphs of whatever he wanted a rant about. Some of them were funny and some of them were not funny, but they were always interesting to read. You'd pause your DVR, and uh you would

you would look at what he wanted to say. So, since it was an old UM episode, I looked at this old vanity card that I had in a while, and it said he was talking about Belarus. Right. Belarus is, as you know, Chuck Laurie, Chuck Lori is a creator

and writer. He was talking about UM a show in Belarus, which is a European country right next to Russia that has a TV show about a bunch of really smart scientists and a hot blonde girl who lives across the hall, right, and they're all nerds, and how what they do is they take word for word pretty much the script of episodes of Big Bank Theory and reenact them in I

guess Russian dialect and act them out. And he can't do anything about it because the network is owned by the country, so you have to sue the country of Belarus. So the name of the show is The Theorists, like Big Bank Theory the Theorists. You can go on YouTube copy word for word, script for script episode pretty much like it's it's very close, and they can agree with

it because there's no one to sue. You can't super you can't You're not gonna win, right, And so I went on YouTube and I watched this and it's it's hilarious because you're watching like fake Sheldon, right, and it's it's a blond dude and then a fake Penny and there, and I watched the first episode, and I watched the first episode of Big Bang on YouTube and it's it's they're doing the same jokes, right. I love it. Now. I wonder if there are other shows that have been

recreated in other countries. Yeah, absolutely can't love Yeah, it happens all the time. So the reason I'm bringing this up is, you know, friend Anthony. Yes I do right now he does, Um he does characters based on his family. Yes, he does, and he does right and then don't. And it's a high pitch thing. It's like Anthony and it's very pitched up, and it is like an exaggerated big mouth. And he's become very it's a filter, right, it's become

very famous doing this character. And it's pitched up. So it's not his real voice, right, his real voice is like he sounds like he's been on our podcast. He's like, hey, Anthony doing but he does. He's like, it's okay. So I'm in the car, and mostly in the car when I'm driving by myself, I would say I listened to the news and sports more than I listen to music. Depends on my mood, how fast I'm going on the turnpike. And so there's a commercial that runs. I Now, you

know I'm in radio. I tune out the commercials a little bit because you know, I've heard them so many times, right, and uh so there's a commercial. I think it's a BMW and it's Anthony Roda. He's like, he's kind of you're gonna get cars to bring the car and I think him again and it sounds just like him, and it's a very funny commercial. Right, but after hearing it like nine or ten times and he's like, scary, is

it okay? He's getting paid? So that hold on? So I I put up this this the video today the last night of the oh my commercial, and Anthony commented on it very funny, that was hilarious. So I said, hey, man, congratulations on your commercial. It's on all the time. So he DMS. He goes, what commercial? You know commercial? Bellaruse? They got belarouse, So he says, so, wait a minute, does a trademark nobody can do that? Well, somebody's doing it.

He's like, well, you gotta tell me the commercial. So I don't remember the commercial, even though I've heard it a thousand times, right because I tuned it out because ripping off his entire act right now, I know Anthony. So I don't listen because I'm like, oh, that's my buddy, Anthony. I don't have to listen to the commercial. I've heard his routine. I like, so, I don't even know the product with shame on me, right, and I can't remember if it's on the sports channel w f A and

in New York or the news channels. I listen to it. I wonder if he even has a case though, because he does that. Anyone can do a voice, no, okay, can't hold on it is. He told me his voice is trademarked. Now, when you hear commercials like here, like there's a commercial running now, it's some it's um Doc from Back to the Future Christopher Lloyd and mar and McFly right Michael J. Fox, And it says celebrity voices impersonated, right, but they don't tell you who it is. They never

say like their names. They just go Doc Marty right, But that they don't it's like, you know, they don't actually like that stay. They kind of like they go to the edges, right, you know who it is, but they don't. It's not they're not trying to pretend it's Christopher Lloyd Michael J. Fox, but they're sort of like doing impressions of characters that maybe your sort of public domain.

They didn't do that in this commercial, And it's not like, Okay, there's a difference if you pitched me up and you're like, Hi, how are you doing? Right? If you pitched me up and I'm just me talking now, and I go, hey, it's brilliant, scary. You just pitched me up. You could pitch yourself up. That's fine. But what Anthony does is he talks it like it is. Uh. He does a whole accent. He does a whole thing. Right, they're doing the exact same accent. They're not just pitching themselves up.

They're doing his voices. But he doesn't own that he does. He copyrighted the I don't think you can chance just bugs. But I've heard I've heard Larry King do commercials on the radio, and then there was a Larry King impersonator that they wanted to. They say, they have to say so you don't think that they're endorsing. You wanted you to think that it's him. But I'm like, wait a second, that's Larry King. On no, wait, it's not. And you have to say the voices celebrity voices impersonated so that

you don't think Larry King's endorsing. I will say this. He may have a point, but this is gonna be an uphill battle for him if he's going to try and pursue anything. Oh, I just wanted to. I'm just saying I uncovered this because I like the way that you were the bearer of bad news for him, and the fact the fact that I that I didn't know it wasn't him helps his case. Yes it does, Yes it does, but I'd like to see in a court of law it's hard. It's hard to prove that. Alright.

So finally, Brody, let's talk about what what's what went on today and why this podcast went on the air so late. This is another another Brody know the chat pulling in. This is why you are Larry David. Because one thing I didn't deserve, it gets the next, he gets the next, and I just I got big, get screwed. That's what I got. Okay, So we told you how

my router wasn't working properly. Right, So I call Verizon because I have a FiOS internet here and I've done all I you know, listen, I'm not one of these guys like did you took the juist plugged in? I know all the reset buttons. I know you have to hold it in on plug it certain. There's certain things they tell you to do. Put a pin in the red thing and hold up a fifteen. Say I did all that. I couldn't get the router to work, which is why we didn't do the podcast. Okay, so I

call Verizon and I get the we're experiencing delays. If you'd like you can speak to someone in a chat, we'll send you a text message, which they do immediately, which I didn't want it. I didn't want to do text chat. Okay, I want to talk to a human being. And they said I you. So they go, continue to hold. We're very busy today, you know. If you'd like to continue to hold plus three, if you'd like us to

set a date to call you back, press two. So I'm like, all right, we'll maybe they'll call me back in an hour. So I I go like call me back, So they go, would you like us to call you tomorrow for a Saturday Sunday or not Sunday, on Monday, the latest possible date please, because that's what I really want. Because customers try in my house, your pricks. So if you call like my electric and gas company and then and they want you, they say, give us, they leave

your number, we'll call you back. They call you back that day the time, maybe they'll call you the next day if it was really late, like if you call it closing, the'll call you the next day. Otherwise they call you back. PSC and G most of the time calls me back. But these motherfucker's are gonna call me on Monday. Today's Thursday. No, Now, I can't get back to the menu where I was on hold, so I have to call back now. So then I get like,

would you like our automated system to help you? Like, well, let me try the automated system. Maybe they'll maybe they'll tell me something I'm notout doing. Maybe there's a combination of buttons I'm not aware of. So they go, all right, enter your phone number, the whole thing. They say, Okay, we're gonna re send the signal to your router. Please hold. Here comes that game. They go, We've resent the signal to your router. If the problem is is fixed, press one.

If the problem is not fixed, continue to hold, and they go our our records indicate your problem has been fixed. No it hasn't. No, the lights aren't blinking. No, no, no, no no. I'm looking at my phone and my laptop and I have no WiFi. There's no WiFi. It has not been fixed. So I'm on hold now for fifty three minutes. Uh, they pick up and I get a part of another part of the world again. Other part of the world is on the phone with me, and uh I. I tell him what's going on, and he

does the thing they all do. Oh, I'm terribly sorry. We realize how upsetting this must be for you, and we were terribly sorry. We know how difficult it can be not to have WiFi service. Can you please help me? Can you not do the thank you think everyone is working from home now, as you know, because of the pandemic. Of course, so we are under we are aware of how important WiFi is. Do you I got okay? Can we please stop? Please stop reading the script? Can I

get to the point like I'm getting anxious? I've been on hold for forty five minutes. I want to talk. So I tell him the whole thing, and he says, here's what we need to do. We're gonna send the signal. I go, you already sent the signal. We're gonna send the signal again. Send the signal. I'll be home in four minutes, I said, But I need a new router. I know the routers bad. Send me a new router. So he says, well, you know, I can't send you

the router, but let's try. So I get home and he has me do that all the things again, right, all the things again, and none of it works. He goes, all right, I need to send me photographs of the router. So I send him photographs of the router. He sets me up like a link in a link to click where I can direct message him photographs. He says, oh, that router, that's the old router. I said, all right, well can I get the new router? Oh? The new routers?

Fifteen dollars a month? What I'm not paying fifteen dollars a month. Give me the give me the same router I have. Now, get me a new one. Can I go to the store and get one? So he says, I'm looking at the store near your house. It's one point six miles from your house. So I go to the store. There's two sales guys in there and two customers. So he says, hey, man, wait on, wait on the bench. No problem. So I'm waiting on the bench and the guy on the phone says to me, Uh, listen, I

can't help you, only get you my supervisor. I said, it's about time I waited like twenty minutes. He's like hemming and hawing. He did the whole thing, like you know, the car dealer. The car salesman goes, I'm gonna go talk to the manager for a better price. So he did the all I'm gonna go talk to my supervisor. So he puts me on hold, and he comes back fifteen minutes later. Yeah, my supervisor says, nothing he can do.

That's bullshit. He put me on hold. He went to go like, you know, whack whack off a little bit or take a lenk. So he comes back. I go get me the supervisor. So supervisor gets on the phone and he says, listen, sir. He says, um, I might be able to overnight you the old unit. I get it to you tomorrow. Not a problem. I go, great. I go now, I want to get a unit here. Well, if I get a unit here that it's gonna automatically cancel your shipment tomorrow. You're not gonna get the all right,

I go, come on, you gotta be kidding me. Order me the router, and these guys are gonna charge me and and he once it, they charge you, it's gonna cancel your shipment. I go, you gotta be kidding me. You gotta be kidding me. So with with that? Uh, the guy says to me when it puts me back on hold, and the sales guy comes over to me because what's the problem. I tell him the problem. He goes, yeah, I have to charge you for the router. It's a

whole thing. I feel terrible. I wish was something I could do, so I said, well, let me talk to this guy on the phone. Let me see what I can come up with, because I tend to win these fights because I let me know what you come up with. Okay, great with that. I see this mean, ornery looking couple, man and woman. He looks like just just a dirty, grubby, big guy right and his ugly woman with him. They just come into looking for trouble. I can see it.

I can see their trouble. And they were like they were nasty to the guy, completely nasty, like they didn't want to wait in line, they didn't care that I was next. They were rude to him like, well, you know what, we we've been waiting for for three days to exchange this and we want to exchange it. And he's like, hey, just just have a seat on the bench, and they were like, no, we were are on the fault, like they had all these problems. Right, So he goes, look,

I'll be with you a second. Sit on the bench. They go, you know what, we do want to sit in the bench. We're gonna wait outside. Well aside, you let us know when we're next. So they go outside and I said to the guy, Wow, you got yelled at That's that's not right that they yelled at you. I said, I feel terrible. I used to work in retail. Why would they why they had problems if they get waited for this shipment, whatever the problem was, I don't know why they yelled at you. Right scared, you know

what I'm saying, Like, don't yell at that guy. Right of a sudden, Now you're you're closing up to this guy. Yes, So I figured, let me be extra nice to this guy because you know, I may ask her for a favor. So I'm on hold. So I'm like, hey, man, I feel really bad. That was terrible where they yelled at you. It was like Karen and her husband, you know what I mean. And so he's like, yeah, I don't understand. He was the guy was shaking. They were screaming at him.

I'm not doing it justice. How rude they will right. So I said, listen, man, I gotta say you. You were very professional the way you handle that, and uh, the fact that they're outside. I'm glad we can talk, you can breathe. I said, I would never speak to people like that. I said, I feel so bad for you. He's like, well, what did you need help with? I go, I don't even want to tell you, like I'm dealing with it on the phone. I don't want to give you extra work to do. He goes, no, no, no,

tell me what's going on. So I tell them about how they want to charge me for the router and they're gonna cancel my shipment. He says, listen. He's I'm gonna I'm gonna reward you would be nice to me when I needed help. I needed someone to be nice. He goes in the back. He comes out and he says, hey, man, i'mnna give you the router what he just take the router just like that. I put it in the system that we did a replacement uh for the router. Uh,

and don't even worry about it. Customer replacement. He's tell me your name. I gave my name, Goes. That's it. I authorized it, no charge, no fee, take it. So you defended him from an asshole couple. Yea, And now you all of a sudden your day is turned upside down in the right way. How about that? I was all ready for a fight. And then I was like, this is my opportunity, So thank you ass whole couple, right right, because that that was right there, that was

the uh the trigger right. Had there not been like fuse lit right, he might have may not have done. You might have been the guy that he was arguing with the entire time. Right, I was ready to go. His angles pushed off in another direction. I was out, karend I love it. How about that? That? Then the guy gets back on the phone and he says, I, we're gonna ship out your unit. Uh what do you want to do about the store? I go, you know what? Door about the store? A good man about it? Man?

You know you know I'm holding the router in my hand, the whole box when new cables, he gave me new cables and desert don't go free dessert. So you know what my point is? Two things slices Number one. Sometimes don't take any crap on the phone right when they're gonna tell you it takes three days supervisor overnight and explain to them is unacceptable to wait three days for

a new router. The world revolves on WiFi. I'm sorry, I gotta have it, and eventually they will go all right, fine, And sometimes you gotta look at that opportunity in life where you can be extra nice and get a little free dessert. So I did. I played both sides today. I played good cop and bad bad cop. But the good cop, let's face it, let's remember this. The good cop is what one you the free dessert in the end this time, not the bad Well no, I got

free overnight shipping from bad copy. I got a little both sides. Your dogs are barking, my stomach is growling. I gotta go eat my pizza Republic. And for all you slices, why don't you raise your pizza slices and celebrate with us. Download Slice Slice life dot Com at Slice on Social and make sure you get your first five dollars off by using code Brooklyn and remember, get everyone you noted, download and get there five dollars. Get him to buy you pizza. Take out your old phones.

Download the app down just download, download, download, Enjoy your five dollars and use the color word Brooklyn. We appreciate it. Thanks eight pizza points you get a free pie slice. Slafe dot com. What's that code word again? I wonder what it could be, Brodie, I'm gonna tell the guys right now, Tell them boys, boys o

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