#162: What's In Your Death Box?

four digits. When I did hundred episodes and probably two years. I'm letting you know I'm not gonna do the math here, and please don't tweet me on the math. But when we get to episode one thousand nine sixty two, right, that'll be that'll be a while from now. That'll be the year, right, yeah, the year it'll be dred Studs from now. Wow, how far do you think this thing is gonna go before we crash? Will probably end around

uh one next week one. Yeah, we'll see how this goes. Yeah. Well, you know, if you are a new listener, ull welcome. We are the Brooklyn Boys. I'm scary that's brody and um brody, that's scary, exactly in neither direction. Uh enjoy this episode. But after this episode is over, we have a rule. Yeah, listen to order and go back to

episode zero. So please take the journey with us because a lot of the things that we refer to on this podcast and we haven't That's why I'm covering this right now because we haven't covered it in a while. But the truth of the matter is, we do a lot of inside jokes. There's a lot of language that you're gonna hear that some of it will be offensive, mostly scary. He's got a potty mouth. But other language that you're gonna hear, maybe stuff that you're like, what

what was that word? I didn't under slang Brooklyn boy slang, Yeah, brook Brooklyn slang. Yeah. Speaking of things you might not know or understand, We've been trying to get on the Deezer app for just because we weren't on Deezer, not because we didn't oo case right. So we got on Deezer and we may have we may have a problem. We don't know yet. Well here's the problem. And uh, Scar told you I was gonna mention it later but

I can't wait. So we got on Deezer. We announced were on Deezer, and I don't think it's possible because anyone who heard us mentioned Deezer last week wouldn't be part of the problem. You would have had to have heard that we're on Deezer and then to be a problem. So now that I think about it, we don't have

a problem yet, but we may. We may. But last week's episode one sixty one, you guys listen to order, so you've all heard it by now, unless you're brand new for some reason, and you can tweet us, by the way, and um, what's today's date? What today's today's February. I'll give you till after that, like a month from now.

It's too late to tell us. But if you listen to this episode or the couple episodes in a row, it seems like we a lot of people have not listened episode one six one within the first week like you normally do. So scary theory is you didn't listen on time because the super Bowl weekend, but we released the episode Wednesday night. The other video I have. The scary theory number two is the fact that they didn't send a notification to remind you to listen, so hence

the low listenership. So here's our reminder. Okay, I learned by the way that I didn't update my um My I Heart Radio app on my phone and I'm at the version right before notifications became a daily thing, So I'm not getting notifications. Okay, there's a reason I'm not updating. It's a long story. But you guys should update, right. So if you are assuming that we don't have a new episode because you didn't get a notification, don't assume that you know, we do an episode everywhere every week.

Now something that when we're on vacation and which case will tell you, hang on vacation, vacage and we're not going to be here, but we may have a surprise for you. We may get some free dessert next week. Well, yeah, we're working on the lawyers are talking. Yeah, but we are on vaca. The Big Stift managers are putting on a presentation. Mr rand Big Show is on vacation next week,

so we schedule President's Day week. We're scheduled to be We can't say next week because we don't know when you're listening to this, right, But we're scheduled to be off the week of the fifteen, and we we have an idea. We have a thing. We got a thing. We may we may put something, we drop something, We drop it like it's hot. Boom. Here's another problem. We aren't sure yet. If if you listen, if you listen on Deezer, if we get credit for the listen, why

are you talking to the Deezer audience. There's probably two people listening on Deezer. I understand that. But until we confirm, uh, switch back off Deezer to however you normally listen, because I don't want Deezer to bury us because we didn't get credit from a four minutes in here. I got a lot of stuff, Yeah, yeah, yeah, I will. Speaking of a lot of stuff the merchandise store. What are we gonna do with that? You know, we need to clear out the current inventory before we start to bring

in new items for spring. But you know, you know it's gonna be pretty warm quick enough, So let's sell those tank tops. Ladies, I'm talking to you and guys, well maybe I'm talking to some of you too. Buy a tank top by tank Top, you know, Muscle t s whatever. Yeah, I would just go up aside because they were, you know, originally women's size. Brooklyn Boys dot Big Cartel dot com. That's Brooklyn Boys dot Big Cartel dot com. I want to throw Buddy off. Who was

waiting tongue? No, no, I was. I wanted to do a dramatic pause because everyone was going did um. Yeah. So there's some things that we know are very popular, and we're gonna fill in some sizes soon. But before we can place a big order, we got to move out some of the things that are there and get an idea of you know, what we're gonna bring in next. Oh, by the way, Janovic, I think was Janevick. I don't want to give wrong credit. I think it was. Or is it it's one of the two. No, no, it

was Jane Vic. I'm up to episode again again another another time. This is the episode where you discussed the merch for Brooklyn Boys dot Big Cartel dot com. I'm waiting for the phone case and pizza cutter, maybe the mount the mounted you're up mountain, but it's okay. Mounted, singing fish, the big mouth billy bass, which in our case would be like big mouth, uh, you know, Joey shark or something right. So, yeah, we were still exploring

what we're gonna bring out next. But we just got the email from the big boss at the company and said, oh, you're missing some sizes. What are you gonna order? So give us an idea if you guys still want shirts, if you try to go buy shirts and we didn't have your size, let us know. Now. This weekend coming up is Valentine's Day weekend, and on Sunday, I'm planning to do something it I have never ever done. Oh,

treat your girlfriend with respect. Hi. Oh see, I set you up for that joke because I knew you were gonna insert funny line here. I figured I would tee it up for Did you think it was funny? The truth, the truth of the matter is, um, what I haven't done forever is stay home. It's your own day. Oh, stay home, on on on Valentin, bless you covid. Oh, by the way, that sneeze is a friendly reminder for me to friendly remind everyone there's there's no m in

Valentine's Day. It's not Valentine's it's Valentine's Day, Valentine, It's not Valentine Day. It's Valentine's So, so, yeah, I'm gonna stay home. My girlfriend's gonna cook for me at her house for the first time ever, How can you stay home if she's cooking at her house, you bring in the food, Well, where's coing to your house? I'm gonna let me put that we are staying home. As a couple. We have never stayed home. We've always gone out to

eat a new restaurants. And you're staying at her home for Valentine's Yes, Wow, when was the last time you slept at her house? Well it's been a minute, but yeah, but it's always at the man's house. True. But but even moreover, the bigger feet here, the bigger accomplishment. Who has bigger feet? I hope you think I do? Definitely do. She's uh, yeah, she she's kind of cook So I think I'm looking forward to it. And obviously these are extraordinary times. So she's cooking, what are you? What are

you doing? What are you bringing? Um? A box? As long as it's a hard shaped, hard shape box, you're fine. Digging her shape? Did you ever do that when you were growing up? Like? No, like you know this Valentine's Day traditions, right, First of all, the couple dresses in red, like all red. It's like, oh, it's the Valentine's couple. I'm red. You're red, so you wear red shirts and everything. You never did that. You weren't the couple that went out to eat and in red, no dinner what we

like people who go to Disney wearing matching clothes. Were you the couple that did the rose pedal trail to the bed with the rose petal? No? No, were you the couple where she shaved her bush in the shape of her red heart. Okay, all right, okay, stop, and you had a heart on for her red shaved bush. No, it's harder to do that these days since most people don't have any That's very true. I'm saying back in that. That's what I'm saying back in the day. I'm going back.

I'm going back to the nineties. Dude. People still had bush in the early up until like two thousand ten, I think was that when they eradicated the bush. And by the way, you know why that is? You know why, uh, the whole general shaving thing, you know, yeah, the old huh right, it's all clear. You get to see, I didn't need a better view. I mean, I watched a lot of porn back in the day. I saw everything fine, So with the advent of porn, it caused women to

shave more. No, not that you're trying to say, no, I'm saying no, the advent of porn. Uh. No one was complaining about porn in the in the eighties. No, But I'm saying that you're saying that caused in real life. That's life imitates art. Yes, it's like, well art, you call it what you want, it's it's life imitating you know, people got men got turned on by seeing women in videos do that, and then it it somehow translated really

spread pun intended to the outside porn world. But women will tell you that they did it for themselves, and they did it as a hygiene thing and not for the guy, because that would be I mean, why would you do that for your guy? You could do it for yourself, right, isn't that what it's all about? You can you can say that, you try to want to, you can get into that debate. We're not gonna get into that debate because because that's the that's the thing, it's the whole all. I do it for me, I

do it for you. I did it for you. Know. Yeah, if there are people who might say, if you go out and with a blouse on and your your large boobs or ninety sent out, she's dresses for herself, right, But then I then I expect you to stare down at them all day like we are. So you're saying if if they're out, you're gonna look unless they're warm and you're trying to cool them. What. They're not there for your looking, they're there for I'm sorry's advocate here.

I'm not saying. I'm not saying I'm saying there are people who say that. I'm not saying I say that, but you think that they did it deliberately and they're dressing for you. If I if I look, if I put on a nice clothing or your tongue tied tonight. No, if I put on nice clothing, right, it makes me feel five percent. Maybe I'm like, I look good tonight.

It's so other people will think I look good. Because that's why you do scary you do you Never you get dressed and you put on your five thousand dollars smoking jacket right when you go Brooklyn Industrial, Are you doing that because you like to you feel better about scary Jones, or you do it so people who go wow looking at smoking Jackie's war. I want to feel good about myself. I look in the mirror, I'm like, you know what, I'm confident people, I'm more confident tonight.

I'm going out of this smoking because you look good to other people. Ah. And they say when you give a compliment, you're not supposed to say that, look, that dress looks great on you. You're supposed to say, you make that dress look great? Is that that carry it too far? There? It depends on who the person is. But if you want to dress like a clown with makeup and a big red afro, then you're dressing for yourself because then you don't care what other people think.

But if you are wearing current trendy clothing, right, you're going on stage at jingle ball, right, you want to look good in pictures because other people are seeing those pictures. So I didn't dress for me that night. I dressed for the masses. Of course, you dress. You know what's something that's most people Well, women are disagreeing right now, they're shaking their head. But I will say here's another.

Here's something that may support your argument. Uh, when you get engaged, right, when you get that ring right, what what do you like to do with that ring? You like and show it off at everybody? Oh, I kind of see the ring every First of all, everyone wants to see the ring. That's the person they ask for. You're not walking around with your palm down, fingers out for you, right, you do it, and you photograph it, and you you make it prominent. So so in that case,

the ring is for your friends and your family. You're not for you. Would you? Would you? Right? If? Yeah? Right? If you wear a paratype jeans, right, they make your ass look good. If you say you're doing it for yourself, you're lying because you can't see your own ass. You're lying. Why do you look good in genes? Because society has determined what looks good in genes. So you are making yourself look good according to societal norms because you want

society to think you look good in those genes. If you say, oh, I'm wearing these geness because they make my ass look good for me, but you don't. You don't see your ass, but you know your ass looks good to who to other other people who don't think, you know what that diets working at that time at the gym is working. You want them to see that you look good in those genes. Then, so it's both I dressed from me. Yeah, but you know, I don't know. You know, I think that I put a Mat jersey

on I go to a Mets game. Am I doing it for me? Or I want everyone in the stands to see my Mats jersey. I want people on television. I want the other fans to see I'm on on one of them. I'm not wearing the Mat jersey to make myself. It's a great listen, it's a great debate. It's been it's it's a debate that's been around a while and then. But I feel like in recent years the tables have turned and people are starting to say, but I dressed from me for you. I know, listen.

I have three daughters, and I had this conversation with one of my daughters three days ago. I said something like she I don't want to get into the details, but I said, you can't go out like that. It was a ridiculous. It wasn't like I was being over that was a ridiculous joke outfits you put together. She just I said, well, she's why I go because she whatever I said, I said, you, I dressed for me.

It doesn't matter. Other people think it matters if you get arrested dressed like that, even though you you because it has an effect, has a ripple effect. You can say you're going outside and your underwear and a braw and it's to make you feel sexy. You're getting attention, which makes you feel good. But that's okay. They're trying to say the attention is your own fault. You know, you know, you know, but I'm giving you the attention.

But if I dressed for me, if you dressed for you, the attention you get for most people, not everybody, is what makes you feel good. We might have might buy new sneakers, I buy a new jacket. I look good. I go I look good today. But it's also don't kid yourself. Most people, not speaking of everybody. Most people also like when somebody goes, hey, you look good in that jacket, then you go thanks, I thought so too. I think it's both. I think it's not just anyway.

So you know, people who may think that we're chauving hisst pigs that we you know we you know, I said men too, if you put on jeans, make your ass look good, you know. Alright? Alright, well, speaking of speaking of people, uh that we lost as listeners. I gotta read something for you. This just this just came through. Um, wouldn't lose anybody in the No, it's my fault. It's my fault. I might have lost a listener on our then you owe me have a listener. Oh my god.

Well okay, so someone left, but they knew we were going to see it. Uh and this is you know, left an age seventy seven type review on on Apple Podcasts. Uh. This came from Samantha Ashle. She used her whole name. Yeah, she gave out podcast one well some some Ashley, Samantha Samantha. She she gave our podcast one star on February fifth on Apple Podcasts, and she wrote, love Brody, okay, next love His rance was a big slice for life. Now

this is where I want to break this down. Is a big slice for life for a while, but no longer can deal with scary and his nonchalance to a worldwide pandemic. Stop make fun making fun of Brody for being cautious. Now this several levels of issue I take with this. First. First of all, um, if you were a Slice for Life, you would have been a Slice

for Life. You see that phrase how that works, And it wouldn't matter you know us of a hundred sixty one episodes that you wouldn't write us off for something that you may disagree with, or a joke that might have been off color, or something I may have said.

It's the whole culture of being part of you know, you don't You don't dismiss your friends, do you The Samantha actually dismissed her ends in family because they might have said something she disagree with, you disagreed with, or it just doesn't make any sense that she would drop us flat and leave a one star review. Ouch she was Samante actually yea. So if that's like nine to five like she works, is probably September twenty five, it's probably her birthday. I like nine to five. I'm going

with that big Dolly parton fan. Here's what I'll say if you have a complaint about Scary. It's, first of all, I understand where it's coming from as a listener, but you guys should know if you're Slice for Life. We're a team. We're a team, and it's it's it's tongue in cheeks. Yeah, it's scary, pokes fun at me. But then I I forcefully pushed back to remind everyone that regardless of where you live, people are dying. We're in a pandemic. And of course i may be more cautious

and I'm a little bit more liberal. I'm a little bit countries. I'm not really liberal. I'm not. I'm a little bit more free. But no, but hold on, I'm for her. Hold on, she get no, hold on, hold on. We want to, No, we need The Slices would agree, yes, getting offended by by loose lip pandemic talking, here's the comment I think that, No, I'm not. This is what I said. This is what I said. I just found it odd that Brody and his family would have the

courage to go to do outdoor dining. This is for your birthday, right, You went outside for your birthday and you were socially distant. Tables were far apart and you were socially distant. You're outside eating and you guys had your entire meal with your masks on. When when people who decide to go out and actually enter that arena. Well most of the time don't have their masks on at the dinner table. So precautions were being followed. The

CDC guidelines were being followed. Let me tell you something. If that restaurant wasn't wasn't following the rules and protocol hold on, they would hold on, they would have been shut down and they would have find I know, but what the rules and protocols are there to minimize the risk, not eliminate the risk. So I made by on the last episode my medical history, the medical history of my family understood. No, no, no, you don't. You live alone,

right understood. So I have different reasons for being extra precautious. And even though I'm six ft away, wind blows saliva. Right, okay, but here's the thing, and don't just went out and if I okay, the point is, don't get but hurt. No, here's here's the point. The point is everything we do on this everything we stop, stop, stop, everything we do on this podcast is fodder. Is not taking offense too and is taking in tongue in cheek, And that's what we do. We joke around on this podcast. We have

silly conversations. But the thing is, I get the right to do that, to make to poke a little fun of you, the same way the smash took it seriously, which means she's not really a slice. She's not really in the club. You know what. Here's what I'll say about smash Lee smash Nobody's her name is Samantha Ashley. I'm actually giving her real name. You name her smash smash because I think it's cute. That's it. I don't want to say her name all the time. It's easier

smash Le, s m Ashley, Smashley. I'm not gonna give her the fuck you abe. I'm Santa Smashly as a slice, smash Lee. I'm surprised you didn't reach out to us. You know, I returned every tweet d M. You couldn't DM me or or hit me up at Brody delvis Er and dot com, which, by the way, I have a little behind on. So don't forgive me. If you've emailed me and said, hey, listen, I feel uncomfortable. What are your thoughts? I agree with you, you know blah,

and I would have said listen. Scary represents a large part of our audience. That doesn't uh, isn't handling the pandemic the same way I am. They may be from part you, guys, slices you may be part of, from a part of a country, of the country that isn't as horrifically affected as the New York New Jersey area was it one was, although indoor dining returns this weekend and stadiums February twenty something. Right, we are fifteen million people crammed into a small area in New York City

and New Jersey. That's a lot more than most states. Okay, So Scary goes about his business as safe as he feels he should be. He wears his mask. He oh yeah, I'm not a rule breaker, rights a rulemaker. So just in case anybody else feels the same way as Smashly and maybe you, we're gonna drop us at the I would say, whatever bothers you, and if you feel like you dress for yourself and your your your your boobs are for you. I didn't mean to offend, but there'll

be people that are offended at that. But the thing is this, and on this podcast for people listening, just you know, we're all in this together. We are you know, we're friends, We're just we're just all people hanging out here. You cannot be a snowflake. I'm gonna go back to the snowflake cannot be. No, don't snowflake. That is a snowflake move. That is a snowflake move. I don't care your opinion aside, your personal opinion aside. That is a snow flake move. I'm sorry it is. This is listening.

We're not supposed to be. We don't do offense serious. I think it's a serious issue understood, but within it's in the context of the joke and poking around each other and then for somebody to just go online and be like, oh, fuck you guys, I'm writing you off. I'm writing you off. Here's what I love you, Brodie. But I'm not listening anymore because Scary has that opinion. I do like that part. Here's what I would say about this podcast and about the op Strand Morning Show

that we're that we're a part of. We we deal this with this every day on a larger level. Actually, hear me out. This isn't the podcast to to cherry pick what offends you, because ultimately, after a hundred and sixty two episodes. We have said things that would normally offend the normal person. Right, you guys are with us because you're not the normal people. Correct. You love the ranting, slightly off, the sexual innuendos, basing your own d the

whole thing. It's like the Strand Show. We've had people. Right. Look, we genuine less so now because the world is changed, But over twenty five years we would we would we pushed the line. We totally. We would poke fun at Ellish people, Spanish people and I mean from Spain, uh Puerto Ricans. We would make fun of gay people in a plan in a nice way, not like make fun of but we would use stereotypes. We would joke around

about everybody in a friendly way. We love everybody. And by the way, since the world has changed, you've come to podcasts like this where we could still we could have fun. We do what we want to do. We're not offensive. We're still like your friends hanging out with you at the bar with masks on, apparently, but we still you know what, say, you have a bar. But honestly, honestly, at the end of the Dad, I don't want to spend any more time on this. No, this podcast is

not for Smashly. No, it's not. What I was saying was people would say, I've been listening for eight years and I'm but today you pissed me off. Why because they were born in Papua New Guinea and we said something silly about Papua New Guinea. But they laughed when we joked about the Philippines exactly, joked about Indonesi, but as soon as we mentioned Papua New Guinea, Papua New Guinea, right, exactly,

you can't. You can't laugh along the road and then the minute it lands on your head, go oh he bastards. So here's what I would say, different from what's scary is saying if you guys know smash Lely because there's no way to respond to comments. Samantha as September she's born. That's my brother's birthday. By the way, if bullshit she was born on September, Darren fucking ted, I'll bet I'll bet the house on it right now. Uh, anyway, my brother,

that's right, That's why I could bet it. My brother's my brother's birthday too. Anyway, Listen, we gotta take a break and we gotta move off because we had this bad juju going on right here, but stop so much. Hey, I'm a jujo, don't you are. I'm offended. I'm not listening anymore. I like Brodie, but scary offends me as

a jujo. Good Bye. I'm gonna hit the jingle. Hit the jingles and got a lot of sound, and we got a lot of email to get to did somebody who said hit the jingle on the Somebody has said something on the Big Show where people were texting and hit the jingle. I love that. I love when Brooklyn Boys crosses over to the other star and uh text message page. But not a lot, just a lot enough to just remind the people watching the text messages you're

paying attention. Somebody promoted something. It wasn't me or scary. Someone else on the show promoted something like hit the jingle. Hit the jingle. Alright, Um, speaking of of of commercials, have you seen the Domino's commercial? It ran like two or three times during the Super Bowl and it was the commercial was it was Harvick? It was one of the that doesn't matter. It was one of the NASCAR drivers. At the end of the commercial, right, I think it

was Kevin Harvick. Maybe, and they were trying to show how you can order curbside pickup for Domino's Pizza. Again, if you live in an area where Domino's Pizza's your first choice, you gotta move. That being said, um, if Dominos wants to sponsor this podcast, you know, I'm all about it. But in the commercial, I know it's for the commercial. Scary, It's just those are these are things that bother me. The woman opens up the back of

her minivan. Right. The trunk of her minivan is spotless clean, which, by the way, never happens if you have a minivan. There's nothing in the back, which never happens if you want a minivan. And they bring out a stack of of a couple of pizzas and they placed them in the center of the trunk perfectly and walk away. Here's what bothers me. It's a nipick. I know it's a nipick. You're gonna jump on me for it. But if you stack pizzas in the back of your minivan, right, what's

gonna happen when you drive? They're gonna fall over the place, They're gonna slide. You don't stack, you don't you put them all laid out on the late so they you kind of lock them in like a jigsaw puzzle, so they can't move right, So I'd be driving back in an hour getting free dessert because they ruin my top pizza.

Then then I think it's Kevin Harvick. Again, it doesn't matter. Okay, he's a NASCAR driver getting out of a car and he's going through the window of the car as a joke, right, and he's in his full NASCAR gear, and a little girl in the car driving body says, hey, Harvick, nice pajamas. Right, it's funny. But then it bothered me because if you know that's Kevin Harvick, then you freaking no, that's not pajamas. That's why that bothered me, because you're a NASCAR fan.

You recognized him, and it's like him getting out of the Harvick car. Obviously I'm not. I'm not a NASCAR fan where I would remember the driver, whoever it was, It doesn't matter, all right, Well, but that's just up to bad writing. It is bad writing. Okay, So we I have some audio by the way coming up. We have a lot of audio rioting, all right, so let's do some quick we have a lot of email to get to. That's just that's some questions for us. We just we do an email this early. Well, it's not

the whole segment. I just wanted to I wanted to kind of throw that out there, guys our email address again, I don't remember the Brooklyn Boys podcast at gmail dot com. Uh, guys, got a question. If you order to take out from a restaurant that normally does seated dining, do you still tip? I got take out from Dinosaur Barbecue left tipped so used to filling it out when I get the bill. It was just reflex. I'm not sure that's the right thing to do, or did I get scambonied? So that's

Kevin Schuller. Now, first of all, I do understand as the cheaper guy, Well before you do that is a little It puts you in a weird spot when you get the you do take out, you get the receipt and you're standing there to bring your food and it still says there's a tip line that needs to be filled out. You're like, why did they do this to me? They put me in an awkward spot? Why don't you tip on pickup and delivery? I do but I don't

tip the full twenty I picked. I tipped ten percent on on no, no, non delivery, on pickup, on delivery, I give you the full twenty. Oh you're out, you get fifteen? What do you give five tennis? How little do you give on a pickup? It depends if to pick up. If you deliver five dollars worth of food, I'll probably give you a five dollars. I'm not gonna give you a ten percent because that's fifty cents. You're

not givings of food. No, if my kids order like they owned door Dash, they ordered the door Dash Fridays over, it's ten bucks. You still got to give the guy five bucks tip. Because if you because you sit on the food, it's still one bag, it's still one drive to your house. What do we do with Kevin here? Because Kevin he's take out all right? Again? Um, depending on your financial situation and where you live, because things

caust different things in different cities. UM. I would normally on a pick up give like four or five bucks, three or four or five dollars, right, not not percentage because you packed up my food. And if you packed, whether it's a steak or it's a slice of pizza, you packed up the food, you put some utensils in. However, because we're in a pandemic, because restaurants especion, our area is suffering and wait staff is suffering, and so many people got laid off, I am giving much larger tips

on because I'm trying to keep them in business. Because if these people don't, you can't pay the bills and can't keep the business, and the staff doesn't want to work there, then I'm not gonna be able to order my my calamari. And over tipping to the small businesses as well. Uh and I had also my Uber drivers. I'm an uber and lift. I I am like going overboard. I'm getting I'm not getting in an ober or lift right now. Well that's you, all right, But anyway, I

do freely every day. I don't care. So we got another email from a guy who doesn't want to be identified, but he said, let me okay, I work am Ashley. Oh no, no, no, no, um okay. Brody mentioned about gas station pizza once a previous episode in reference to cases of the Midwest. Casey's is a staple in Iowa and nearly every convenience store they build is equipped with a full kitchen. Most notably, they serve a Bitch and Breakfast pizza that has a buttery cheese sauce with eggs, sausage, bacon,

and cheese. All I could say is, that's not hold on wait now, that's a breakfas pizza. Don't knock it till you try it. Most out of town people are pleasantly surprised. So secondly, Olver's is the only drive through fast food restaurant. So that was Casey's. That's a gas station. Uh. Culver's is the only drive through fast food restaurant that you should pull forward for when a tong comes to pulling forward. I know another listener has brought them up before.

In fact, it's standard to pull forward at the drive through. Because Culver's food is all cooked to order. You will always get a freshly grilled and assembled butter burger and may have a sign at the drive through. Many have a sign at the drive through that tells customers to come back through if their fries aren't hot enough. I'm sure Brody would still find fault with this, but all at all, the service and quality makes this chain worth

a five minute wait. That's from anonymous. So he's trying to say that even though it's fast food, it's it's more like food coming up fast, and it's okay to pull forward into a spot because it's worth the extra time that it takes to the food. If they're trying to give you a fresh, prepared food, that's different than uh Taco place wanting you to pull up so they can tell their manager they're averaging a three minute ticket time.

That's different. That's them wanting to look better and scam their bosses at your expense while you pull next to a garbage pail. That's different. So you can give me a final quality fast food, like, for instance, Rolling Roaster, And she said, Bay Brooklyn, where I used to be a manager. If you're from the area, you know it's fast. But it's not that it's not it's it's like quick food, but it's exit. It's quick food. It's quick. It's it's the register, you order at the counter and you pick

it up at the counter. Not as fast, they don't have a drive. Not quite as fast food. Right, We're not so fast Rolling Roaster was a jingle. We're not so fast Rolling Roaster. They were telling you in the jingle. We're not that fast. Okay, so it's okay to pull forward. But when when you were talking about the big chains that that's go back to the pizza thing. I'm not listening. If your breakfast pizza is good, it's really breakfast on breast breakfast. It's a it's an open faced breakfast much.

That's really what it is, and I'm fine with that. Then it's fine. But again, it's like white milk if you put modifiers in front of it, if you call it breakfast pizza, then it's a different thing. Yeah, but it's pizza. It's shaped like a pizza. It's shaped like it's got dough. If it's dough and things are on top of dough, and that's defined as pizza. Could you consider eggs and hash brown and bacon on top of it's really open face sandwich is what it is. Speaking

of pizza. If I can just interject for a moment, because I've done that once or twice before. You think I watched the movie recently on HBO Max. Uh, you sounded like, uh, the president the President Obama. No no, no, no, no no no, the horror movie. So but President Obama used to do that even anyway, So I watched a movie with Denzel Washington Rommy Mallick called The Little Things

based off your penis. Nope, Nope, based on your brain, and uh, I'm gonna give you a partial review based on your patients in that the name, the name of the movie is The Little Things, right, And he says in the movie, sometimes you catch people because of a little Things. No spoilers, I'm not gonna spoil the movie. Okay, that's the only time they mentioned it. And then the little Things really have nothing to do with the plot of the movie. Okay, but that's at the point. There's

a scene in the movie not gonna ruin it. I'm not gonna ruin the movie where they they show up a pizza that a suspect has bitten and that that checking his bite marks against other bite marks. Not a spoiler, not a sponsor, not a spoil not a sponsor. The the autopsy, the not the mortician. It doesn't matter what the woman doing the autopsy, right, um, she says to him,

this guy must be back, must be from the Northeast. Look, he folds his pizza, which folding it at the folding it at the at the crust and half where the New York slice of pizza, not Chicago deep dish to do that is a New York thing. The problem is, as a New York I went, oh, yeah, look at that he folds his pizza. That might be a clue

he's from the Northeast. The thing is it was like conveyor belt Domino's pizza, So if he's from the Northeast, he wouldn't eating it, right at least go get you know what, when they filmed Iron Man, it was either Iron Man iron Man too right. They bring a box a raised pizza from Greenwich Village in the scene, Um Happy says, I got your pizza from Raising the Grange Village, And the box is actually a box from Greenwich Village. And the slice of pizza at least looked like a

New York slice of pizza. They may have printed the box in California, but they made the pizza look like a New York slice. So I give him props to Marvel for that. This pizza was like, you know, it doesn't matter. The point is they made the whole thing. I's like, this guy must be from back north, back in the Northeast. But then the rest of the movie. They don't say anybody else was killed in a similar fashion in Northeast. They never mentioned the Northeast. Again, there's

no reference to the Northeast. So they just put that scene in so they can make her look like, Oh, like that pizza looks like it was must have eaten from someone in the Northeast. That's there's arbitrary, very random, and it didn't have anything to with the plot. Here's what I'll say, save your time. The movie summed not like one tour, but the pizza thing pissed me off to no end. He's like, oh, this guy must be from back East. But then it had no relevance to

the plot. It was like, if you watch the movie, you'll know what I'm talking about. You know, I will say, I don't think anybody's gonna watch it after that review. You may have already watched it, and I want you to tweet me and scary, I've already seen the movie, or if you're gonna watch it anyway and tell me if you feel like they took an out. That's a hard pass from you mentioned sleepy time solutions. I don't know what that is. Pretty talking about, pretty pretty litter

pretty litter. Did we talk about pretty litter on this podcast? Is it kitty litter? It sounds like you may have mentioned it last week's Well we should You made my day. I was listening to your podcast while exercising and heard you talking about my pretty litter scamboni. Oh this is the This was Kate, the woman who emailed us about the pretty Litter SCAMBOI we read this email. Oh yes, yes, yes,

I wasn't expecting it, and it made me smile. I've been a listener of the Big Show for sixteen years and recently took a leap of faith and moved from New York City area to Maine to be closer to friends and family. As a result, I had to start listening to the on demand channel that's for the Big Show anyway. So Kate, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa whoa? What's her first name? Kate, Kate McKee. But she's the owner of Sleepy Time Solution. Okay, Kate, let me interject

here for a moment. Kate, Um, you can listen to us on on on IRT Radio Live. You don't have to listen to the on demand channel, which you can when you miss something aren't we on in an FM station in Maine? I think Maine's a big place. Uh, we're on in Maine, Portland, Portland, Maine. No, we're not, alright, We're in New Hampshire. Uh Portsmanship ports sports Smith, New Hampshire. Anyway. The point is one seven the Coasts hit music station right on seventy five radio stations at any given moment.

You can listen to the feed on any of those stations on I Heart Radio like one hundred New York for instance, your old radio station, and listen live. Who said you couldn't, So we're gonna educate you and and anyone else. You can go to Elvis Oran dot com slash how to listen, and you can find out all the ways you can listen for free. That's all public service announcement. I expect you to listen live to the elvist End Morning Show. Now I can go on all day.

We have someone wants to come at you, Brodie. They want to come at you. Some guy. He wants it's not the way that you're describing it. He wants to get get, get in your face, beat me up with debate me on someth debate. It was Andrew Crope who has a problem. Yeah, you can't crope with the situation. Hey, slice for life. Here's the ship sandwich. Love you guys.

Episodes y'all never bothered me. Always good stuff. Okay, I hated the last episode, dude to myself being in an m l M multilayer marketing company full time with my wife. And not everyone is the same. You guys kind of have every company. You put every company in a bad light. I get the same spammy assholes like you guys do, and all the crappy products. But again, not everyone is the same. Not everything is a pyramid scheme and only winning if you're just on the top. Just thought i'd

share with you guys. Still love you guys, but you both oh, both of us are very wrong in that category. Very uneducated for the matter of for sure. So Andrew and his wife are part of a we called it a Ponzi scheme, like the Lulu Ro's of the world, the pyramid schemes right where you can only you know, get out, cash out after you get ten people to join. Here's what I'll say, Andrew. I will do a little more research, but here's what I'll say. And I'm glad

you're slicing stuck with us unlike smash Ly. Yeah, there you go. You said it. Fuck you smash Ly, f you smash She hates you. This is why she hates you. And I'm not gonna get any love back from her. It doesn't matter anymore. You know what, we gave a great explanation. Someone who knows her, it's gonna tell her we felt, and she's gonna come back, and then she's gonna We're gonna lose her. You're gonna be like, what

are you gonna be a dick for? What are you gonna put the Brooklyn Boys when you love them for a hundred eisodes? Jesus give us at least three, give us three stars with a you want to take a star away from me? I don't care. Fine, no, no, no, okay. As far as that, I don't want to delve too hard into this. The problem with most and Andrew. I can't speak for your company. You could be the best top of the pyramid guy. Ever, I'm not saying it's pyramid. Let me phrase that top of the multi layers. You

could be on the multi level level one. But somebody is at level thirty seven and they're not getting anybody for thirty eight, and they're fucked. That's how it works. If you're a level one, you will never meet level thirty eight. You don't have everyone come to the office. You don't have all the levels get together for a big thing, unless you you take out a convention and you're like, oh, buy my tapes and books on how to do market most I can't Andrew again, if you

have reinvented MLM. Notice I didn't say M LM marketing because that's redundant. If you've if you've reinvented MLM, congratulations, congratulations to the to the the the lms below you. Um, I'm just saying for normal companies, somebody at level ninety three is not getting level ninety four. And and unless you reimburse level ninety three for their inability to get

ninety four, it could be able. More people have been exposed to this, the more the less of a chance you have of getting out because you've asked everybody already. They've they've all been asked, so they're like, no, I'm done with that, I've heard about it before, I'm out, or I already participating with this person. So again at some point it reaches us a market saturation and it's

impossible to make money at some point. If you are not Andrew and you find out who what what company Andrew is h MLM, and you want to invest with Andrew, go right ahead. I'm we were just saying that, let's just say most M M LM can be a problem. And if you if you think most, we're talking about this last month and we'll move on, you're gonna get stuck with a lot of merchandise in your basement. That's all I'm saying. You got room for you have breath

for one more Brody that's complaining. Oh I got Alan Lendon goodrow By. All these people have slid into my d ms on Instagram at Scary Jones. Brody should have taken offers from private buyers for his broken washer. All you have to do is make sure it's listed as as is and no refunds. Because even though those private buyers aren't businesses, they may have the know how to fix it or be able to get it fixed and

still come out cheaper than a new one. Why not let them know what's wrong with it and let them make an offer. It's better than zero dollars. All right, I will tell you why, because I just listed it. I took my owner your advice before you gave it, and I listed them online. Okay. I listed them last night, and I clearly said the wa sing machine has this defect. It stops in the middle of the wash and you're done. It says there's an SD error, not an your own. Yeah, yes,

I said, at first, it's a SuDS error. However it's it's it's an error that would come up if you have too many suns. It doesn't matter. There's no SuDS. I run it without SuDS. There's no salp nothing, It's it's a glitch in the Okay this He goes on again to something else. He's going, all right, hold on. I listed them and I said, uh, everything, every detailed measurements, all the things that I replaced on the dryer. Then

I said, the washing machine. I've replaced everything. It's new inside for the most part, except this error that I have not been able to fix. Okay. Three people contacted me within an hour. I'm interested. I want them. I won't come get them. I said, okay, do you have a hand truck like the listing says, because I have five steps to my basement. Right, do you have a hand truck? And did you did you read the description of the washing machine that there's a problem, YadA, YadA, YadA.

They all wrote back, Oh, sorry, not interested. The problem is people will say they read it. They'll think they can just get it fixed. They'll go, oh, oh, you know what, I'll get the washing machine for a hundred bucks. It's a six hundred dollar washing machine. I'll get someone to fix it for a hundred boom. The problem is I have a PC and G service contract, which means they come anytime I want for seven dollars a month,

and they've tried numerous times and can't fix it. Now, somebody else might be able to fix it, but if you're a Joe guy living in the house, you're not You can watch all the YouTube videos you want, you're not able to fix this thing. So I wanted to sell it to a place where they can use it for parts or replace. The point let him continue, because that was that was on Friday night. I'm sitting right next to it right now. That was on Friday. I

have the new washing machine right that, you know. I got a PC Richard um and I'm sitting next to the one that's broken because I wasn't able to get rid of it when they were here. I told you this, I had to change all the pipes of myself. Yeah, I'm sitting next to it, all right. So on Friday he wrote to me, and then tonight, just to two hours ago, he writes, Hey, uh, but let me set

this up. Last last week Brody made fun of me because I was was one of thirty one people that received the twenties Standing Ovation Award, which was an award for the essential employees at I Heart Media, and they gave me a nice framed glass plaque Thank you. I Heart Media. Women is one of the people that that that that you're in with. No, this guy is a listener, he says, a party, and you called it a participation trophy and it's not a real trophy. You can you

basically pooh pooed my award. So Hera Allen writes back that a participation trophy is different from what I got because the losers didn't also get one, just like a championship ring is not a participation trophy for the Super Bowl because the Kansas City Chiefs didn't also get a super Bowl ring just for playing. Okay, here's where he's wrong though, Blaine Gabbert. Do you know why blame Gabbett was trending on Super Bowl Night? Blaine Gabbert is the

backup quarterback for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. I don't think and I could be look if you're a buckets apology, he got a ring hold on, right. I don't think Blaine Gabbert played a snap this year, and from to what I know, he could have played it, you know, during a blowout game. He he yeah, he had no impact on the playoffs, on the run on the Super Bowl. He gets the ring. God blessed, and that's other rules are I get it. But if he walks into a like a bar, he's like, look I got a ring,

He'll go, oh, who'd you buy it from? Blaine Gabbert? And he gotta partici participated on the team. Do you know, like in in Major League Baseball, if you like get traded after like forty games, the team wins the World Series, still gonna ring? You still gonna ring? Right? I get that. That doesn't have the same level of like when Tom

Brady gets a ring. He earned the goddamn ring. So Blaine Gabbert was trending because people like dude, Blaine Gabbert got a Super Bowl ring, and I'm happy for Blank Gabett. I'm sure he's a good man, a good but he didn't Standing Ovation award. Yes, go look on Twitter trending. Okay, alright, great is the backup quarterback to Todd fucking Brady? How do we fall so far behind Brod? We've got some much to get to. I didn't talk about the dusty old box. Wait a minute, this is this the thing

about your aunt. Yeah, that's kind of sad. I don't want to bring it down, but I kind of want to talk about it. And then I know you have a million things yours. I want to do that and come back. But let me get do a couple of quickies. Here. I got in trouble. Um my wife and daughter bought some stuff in Victoria's secret. Um uh maybe January, pre pandemic. Then the pandemic hit and the moles closed and nobody

left their house and whatever. So this bag of girly stuff has been sitting in the uh in the closet, waiting to be returned. And my wife says to me, a couple of weeks ago. Yeah, you know that bag, because I was like, what's with this bag? Yeah, it's too late. They're never gonna take it back. I said, you leave it to old Mr Brodie. Here, I will, I will have it returned. Not to worry. So I figured I'll just explain pandemic. They gotta make an exception,

no problem. So I go in. And if you've ever walked into Victoria's Secret by yourself as a man, I have. If you're really actually and just walk out, Oh nice. If you walk in and you're really good looking, they assume like, oh, yeah, you're buying something for your hot girl. Yeah. But I feel like when I walk in, they look at me like, oh, here's the guy who likes to wear underwear girls underwear, or like he wants to look

at the posters or people. Yeah, and you can't walk into the single you or or if you are a single guy and I've done this before, you've got to go right to one of the people on the floor. And that's fact I'm looking. I'm looking for this for this person. Otherwise, if you're just creeping around feeling the underwear in the between the racks, that's right. Awkward, right right, Okay, And by the way, there's nothing wrong with men wearing

ladies underwear. I wasn't saying there was. I'm saying, you get that look like I'm not here to buy stuff for women. And I get to the register and there's nobody behind the counter when I first get there. So I'm standing there kind of just staring at the at the desk, and I feel like the women are looking at me, like, who's that guy just staring because right behind the register is three posters of beautiful women in in lingerie, So it looks like I'm staring at the

giant posters for the mannequins maneins behind the register. But still at the same point, this is some hot hot mannequins are So anyway, I go to the register and I do the return and I explained, you know, COVID blah blah blah pandemic, and they not a problem, take everything back. And the girl behind the counter was a a no noser. Yeah she wore she was wearing a chin diaper, right, but not on purpose. She was wearing

or actually covering her mouth, only not the nose. The problem was and this isn't even part of the why I bring up the story. She was wearing a blue surgical mask like the paper ones, and it wasn't tight fitting, and it wasn't adjustable, and so she was chewing gum like a cow. So every time her mouth dropped to open her mouth for the gum down, so she would go and have to put the mask over put the

mask over nose. So she would occasionally forget as we're talking, and I would keep some tells me, that's not what the point of this is, you know, I'm turning. It bothered me because it was she was a gum chewing noser, because the man don't chew gum. If your mask doesn't fit, did you get really get I get the return? Well mail,

your refund'll take six weeks. Whatever. Good. I now feel like, let me get the funk out of here, because of course I got to get out of him alone, and as women behind me online, I was like, haven't I stay, ladies, I was like trying to get out. And then as I turned the corner there was a woman who's a little bit larger with with I wasn't googling very very large breast. Yeah, I guess again she was an oversized woman with I mean like basketballs and she and her

hands cups, not the coffee kind. She had a she was trying on a big bra right over her shirt, and you know women like to make sure it fits right. Just as I turned the car, her hands were on her own breasts over the bra, like pushing them and like making sure that brawl was fitting right. And of course when you turn a corner, whatever's in front of you catches your eye. And what was in front she was her big so I kind of like look at all and I and I do, like because I almost

walked in our right. But she looks because this is an unfortunate misfortune of David, she and her friends, because she was with two girlfriends look at me, like why you look at my tent's creep, And I'm like, I wasn't.

I wasn't. No look, no look right like a Seinfeldt, no pick, no pick, because and she wasn't a short woman, so her boobs were almost at m like almost like level, so like looking at them, I wouldn't have had to move my head and I would, and she I reacted like I was given because she's grabbing her own boobs. That that's awkward. So I got, I got, I got boob accused bob acucue from those tig ole biddies, well from the woman with naturally, uh you know whatever I

was trying, but I wasn't looking. All right, happens, Okay, I still like to go in there to fart because it's beautiful. It smells so nice in there. Oh you know what's even better place candle. But you can always cover it up. You just go ok in there and go or shop the body shop those places, or even even in uh no, no, no apercrom It smells like someone dropped the case of cologne in there. Every time somebody dropped perfume and didn't clean it up. Here's what

you do. Here's what You go over to the sample stuff and you spray it like you want to see how it smells. But you do it as you farted like, but then you already spraying like, oh oh this smells like leather. Oh yeah, I like this. That anti enne

is not sitting right now. Well, you can also fart by anti enns because that cinnamon, or like cinnabon, you can fart by cinnabon because the cinnamon comes up nowhere else you fart cinnabon Yankee candle or or a place that sells cauliflower, because no one will ever notice because it smells like abercrombiean and farts. All right, and we gotta take a break, and then we got some things to cover. I gotta I gotta vodka, chicken parm panini. Problem. Yeah,

and I have a problem. And we have sounds, and I haven't. I have to talk about the dusty old box. All right, we'll get to that right after the scary all right, you know, all right, well past the old boxes. I think we should finish on dusty old box. You want to finish on that? We got sound good? Just tell you my chick in Pompanini story because your opinion, Yeah, fine, go for it. This is hit it. This is not a Scamboni, but I feel like they tried to scamboni me.

So I have the jingle ready. There's a I'm not going to name the place. There's a place in New Jersey where the guy is from Brooklyn. They sell a Brooklyn Slice, which is basically a rip off of Lmbis Mamonial Guns. Their logo is a Brooklyn Bridge, and I want you to know I love them, love them the pizzas fact, No, I don't think so I'll tell you why I went in. Uh. Last week, I happened to be where I was going to visit my mom. I

was wearing my Brooklyn Boys shirt. My mom loves the show hoodie No No, the Great T shirt property of and so I walk in wearing my Brooklyn Boys podcast T shirt and they're all in Brooklyn Bridge shirts and nobody noticed my Brooklyn Boy shirt. I thought it was odd that they wouldn't go, oh, Brooklyn Bridge the Brooklyn Slice. But one of the things they sell, which I have every time I'm there. No matter what pizza I get, I cannot not get this. It's a chicken palm pannini

with vodka sauce. And they have it up on the counter like you know in the pre made stuff, like it's there, and when you order it, they sauce it and melt the cheese, put in the oven. You're done, okay. So I get that. I order a head so I can run and run out, and I'm h I want to say, it's maybe twenty minutes from my mom. So on the way from my mom there, I like to a little snacky, snacky, little eat and run, little eat

and drive. I take out my chicken palm Pannini to take up just to take a little bite as I'm driving. It's like a pocket of food. It's fantastic. I get my napkins ready because the sauce just oozes out. It's so yeah, and I and I take a bite and as dry as as dry as a rock. I opened it up at the red light, and it looks like there's a little bit of an orange haze on the bread, like either it was buttered or like they took a paintbrush and they painted it with with light orange or

light pink. You could just faintly see the bread is this color there. There's no sauce. So at this point, I'm I'm five minutes from my mom. I'm like twenty minutes away. I called back and I said, hey, listen, I ordered this big thing. I spent like fifty bucks on pizza and food for my mom that you wanted say, I said, listen, I ordered the chicken pompanini. There's no Vandka sauce on it. Now, we've all heard this excuse before, and I was very surprised that they tried this on me.

They said, oh, it must have absorbed into the bread. That's a scam. That's a scam. Boni, that's it does That's not what happened. That's yeah, yeah, we know. That's you trying to like say to me, oh, no, it's in there. It's like when you were like, oh, the cheese, it must have melted in. It's it must it's not. It doesn't absorb dicks. And don't aren't you a grown ass adult to know that that's not the way that that that that you know, substance reacts with bread. Give

me a first of all. First of all, again, I have it at least twice a month, right, I've had it thirty times in the past year or two, or maybe they gave you an old piece, or maybe it was the end of the end of the batch. And like you know, we're just gonna try and make more. Telling me that the giant I got my napkins ready, because the sauce always squirts out. If you're telling me

that much sauce absorbed into the panini bread. And by the way, if you're a baker and you can tell me that the average could take in nine ounces of vodka sauce. Don't tweet me. I I don't want the science behind it. I gotta say, if this sauce is gone, scary, it's been sitting there for three days. If the sauce you put on because I got there, I got there.

I want to say it was two o'clock roughly. If if by two o'clock in the afternoon, five ounces of sauce has absorbed into the bread, then I want new bread and new sauce. So the guy says to me, or what do you want me to do? You want to come back, I'll give you a a little sauce on the side. I said, I'm not gonna come back. I'm twenty minutes away. That's gonna put me forty minutes out to visit my mom twenty minutes back. I said, I can't come back. He said, what we want to do?

I said, well, you know I'm a regular customer, right, I don't know. Maybe he can give you a better one next time I come in. I don't know. I gotta get you a sauce. Hold on, you say this, guy says, Thomans sending Brad got up and TiO. The guy goes, we'll give another one. So he comes back. He goes, I will give you a credit for next time. My point is the guy was like trying to give me the old absorbed into the bread. Okay, but here's the thing. I'm eating the bread. I don't taste any

voca sauce. If it absorbed into the bread, you would taste right. Would the break be like the juiciest vodka is sauce? You know what? I don't scare. I'm I'm as Italian as to come without being Italian? Italian? What is it? What are you? What is your what is your Russian? And Polish? I think? Look, I'm American if you want to. But my grandparents immigrated from Russia and Poland. Uh in a long, long freaking time, a long time ago.

My great great parents were born in Europe. My my grandparents migrated one set from Russia, one set was born here in America. So I'm fourth fourth generation American, one half. There's something I want to tell you, And this is something I gotta bring up here. And I don't even think I really mentioned this on the Big Show. I really haven't had the chance. We don't sound last. Yeah, So my um so, my aunt Millie, my great aunt Millie, who I've loved as as a grandma. She's treated me

like grandma. Grandson. You talked about aunt Millie more than your parents sometimes. I've talked about it for five years on the radio. Yeah, your aunt Millie used to steal stuff her used to steal coffee and different things that she She passed away at ninety six years old last week and last week also, I was a little, you know, bit off she had passed, but we were planning stuff off in the background, funeral and things like that, and so my head wasn't really in the game. Um, but

you know what, she lived. She lived again. She lives a great life. And again it was not by the non COVID related Let's throw that out there right now, because people always ask anyone, anyone who do no know anyone who passes away in this year, They always say did they have COVID? Was it COVID? Okay, okay, let's put this way. Most deaths, you know are not okay. They're just saying, okay, all right. So as it turns out, um, my my mother calls my sister on the phone and

she goes, all right, Jen, go get the box. And my sisters like what what box? Turns out and Aunt Millie's closet in her bedroom, she had I mean, I'm calling it a death box. So there's no other better way to put it. So my sister's like, okay, because I want you to read me whatever instructions or if

there's a note in there. So so my sister go into the closet and goes into the top right corner and the big box is there, and there is the box and she opens it up and there is this is kind of creepy, the clothes that my aunt wanted to be buried in that my aunt chose. My aunt. Let's go back ten years when she was living at the house, just had nothing to do on a Sunday afternoon.

She she had the foresight to be like, you know what I want to I want to put together my my my end of life box, whatever you want to call it. Um. So she literally put in She's all right, I want these this shirt, this dress, i want these shoes. She put everything in there, even her underwear and everything. She put all of her clothing in there, and then with the note specific instructions, I do not want any jewelry on me, I do not want I mean, I know this is kind of hard for people to listen

to right now, this is kind of totally shifting gears. Um. She she wanted uh, this rosary beads that she left in there too, because I want this in my hands. I want my hands faced this way and this and that, and I don't want any flowers in the coffin. And then she she was so meticulous because I guess I guess all the years that she was going to other people's wakes, she she probably looked and she's probably I don't want that when when I go, I don't want that.

She made a lot of mental notes. So ten years ago she put together this box, put it in the closet, and then at some point in in last year or so, she told my mother of his existence. So my sister had had the job of reading to my mother on the phone, like all this this long note and the specific instructions so my mom could actually share it with the funeral home. WHOA, that's kind of crazy, right, pretty heavy. But you know, I say this not you know, you're like,

where is he going with this as a joke? Because his entertainment value, it's more of is this a common thing? It's more of a question for you and the the slices. Is this something that you've thought of in your healthier, sane early life to say, not now, but would you? Is this something you will eventually do? And be like? You know what? As I get older in life on a Saturday afternoon, there's nothing going on, it's raining, I'm

not going out today, you know what. I want to put together my end of life box and then start gathering things I mean and with a note and writing a meticulous note. Maybe at n I would consider it. But for instance, as a Mets fan, yeah, you might go. He probably wants to be buried in his Mets jersey. He probably want you're as these things. No, I do not. I'll tell you why. I don't want my mat Jesi ruined. It's just gonna get get bugs eating it. It's gonna

deterior I didn't break down. I don't know. I don't want that. I want to bury me in crappy clothing the should I wore every day to work during the pandemic, T shirts and jeans and who's gonna see me? Who's gonna see me? By the way, when I die I will not be dressing for myself or anybody else either, or not dressed of anybody. I'm dead. But let me ask you a quite and scary well. Hold on, when you're Catholic, you know you have an open open cask.

Oh no, I'm so glad. I'm Jewish, closed that ship up. No, I do not want to see it. I don't want to know it. I don't. I'm very uncomfortable. I'm not. We know, we had a we had a traditional Catholic. It had no I want to open casket. So we saw her. She had her dress on, she had everything that by the way, we followed. We followed her her rules like just to to a t Yeah, so we wish her wishes, last wishes. If I had awake, if I had awake, now I would say, I want to

be in the wake, in the wake, awake. If you're dead, you're going to awake. But it's the persons continue um. By the way tweets scary, I don't want to know. Also, also by the way, big fail. When I asked you guys to tweet scary first birthday, please don't tweet me and scary first birthday? All right, Okay, So continue continue here, I'm gonna ask you a ques and scary whether it's your Aunt Millie or God forbid, someday your parents, let's

say Aunt Millie or your mom for instance. Right, make a little closer to the home because you're probably eventually you and your siblings have power of attorney over your parents. Right, Let's say your father passes on at mother lives your mother hundreds. You're right, your mother outlives your father, because that's how it normally works. That's the norm. And you and your your two siblings are in charge of everything.

And you open up your mom's your mom's box pun intended, and it says, I want to be buried with my thirty five thousand dollar engagement ring. Wow, it means so much to me. Your father gave it to me. And so you're saying, at some point, when it comes to something of value, you have to draw the line and

make it up a number. I don't know what a ring is worth, but let's say it's Let's say it's a thirty thousand dollar ring because she got it in the sixties and now it's worth much it's and she's like, oh, I want to be it's a symbol of my love to your father. You have thirty dollar ring? Do you do? You mock up a zarconia a cubic right and and have a replica put in right or just like you, and you don't tell your brother and sister and you

just put it on and nobody knows. Or at the wake you put on the fake ring and nobody knows. They're all like, oh, Roseanne wanted to be buried in the ring. There's the ring, but it's a fake ring. Right? Would you put thirty thou dollars into the hole because some dead woman wanted you to do it? And no, one's never gonna know. She's not gonna know. Yes, she she's looking down dead, she's looking down. What is she gonna do from looking down? When you get to heaven,

she's gonna go ahead. Maybe she's gonna hunt my house. So you take the thirty thousand dollar ring, you buy it, You put ten thousand dollars into charity far for whatever she passed away from. And you take twenty dollars and maybe you maybe or you know what, you know it

would make your mother happy. What if you took the ring and gave it to your girlfriend some day and you proposed her with her ring, she'd forgive at that point, right, if you get so you're trying to say that that if if, if you make a death box again a morose name for this, don't put anything, don't put anything valuable? Yeah you should. Everything's everything is fair game until you know. I want gardenias in the castket. I want to like you.

You can google this. But sometimes rich people get buried with their piano or in their car. You can look rich people have like I want to be buried in my Porsche. Dude, stop it. I'm not burying in your Porsch. I'll buy a Volkswagen. So you take into a certain limit and then it's like, you know what, Yeah, if the cost of what's going in the hole with them is more than the course of the funeral and everything else, Yeah,

I don't know the line. Right. I'm not saying if you pour and you can't live in this, money will keep you, Like I'm saying, if it's just a nice thing, like I we a bonus, you can buy a nice car, down payment on something, you can go go vacation right for thirty grand to Europe. Whatever. I'm not saying you need that thirty thou dollars to live because you're harving. Then it's a no brainer usually, And I get if you're so religious that you couldn't, I get it. But

I'm talking about everybody. All right, Look, mainstream scary. What would you do? I wouldn't? Right, what if your mom hears this and says, Anthony, I heard the podcast. Despite that, I'm gonna put your brother Stephen with the non Italian name, which means you just sucked me. Thank you, brodie in this situation, Okay, but you you know your brother and sister would they would they put ring in the hole? No? Right,

all right, we rest our case. But anyway, it's interesting to think about if you if people are playing these kinds of things. I never thought about it until I realized that, wow, this is the first what's the one thing? Give me some one thing you'd put in your death box? In mine? Yeah? What would be in your death box? Nine million dollars sounds I want myself phone in there. That makes sense. But even if it's let's say you die when it's an iPhone forty nine, right, iPhone forty nine?

You want your brand new iPhone forty nine put in there, or you want like your old twelve from this from now that you saved, so you have a phone with you. You know, I don't know what I want, and I don't know I would I would forget it anyway. I want free to ssart, That's what I want. I want my funeral to be wrong and somehow my family benefits and gets a free a free funeral thrown in. So we've already gone long. We have eight pieces of sound

to get to. We gotta do this kind of quick, right, so unless you want to save it, you know what this this? Okay? Um? Your family going to be knocking down the door in a second. I mean, oh no, no, we got a few more minutes. I think my wife's going to cost go first. Good alright, So then so here we go. Let's let me look at the list and I sent you and i'll see if this. I wanted to start with Amazon. Uh oh Amazon? Yeah, So I got a tweet. Oh damn it, I know you

can stuff Amazon. I got a tweet this week and maybe have been yesterday. I don't know was a tweet or oh shit, somebody tweeted and said it was a scamboni from Amazon and that they got this message and they want to know if we've talked about it, and I said, yeah, absolutely, in fact, it happened to me, but I thought we didn't play the sounds. I sent it to you two weeks ago. So I got this message. Uh, you tell me if you think it's legitimate or not.

At home, five pm, we have found some suspicious activity in your Amazon account and order has been placed for iPhones and from your Amazon account, and the card linked to your account has been debited for three hundred and nine dollars. If you have not placed this order, press one to speak to the fraud department to cancel it urgently. Thanks for your time. Have nice day ahead, Have nice day ahead. By the way, it sounds like a speak and spell and if you remember those things. But why

is it that's the second scam I've played? What was the Social Security Office of what I have nice day? You're gonna go to all the trouble to get a computer generated voice and write a script? Can't somebody say have a nice day listen to the bon jovis nice day ahead? Like, oh you had me. I was about to call because these people are speaking different languages. They're just hoping they're just But why does it always have nice day? Why is that when they lose you at

the end? You lost me at uh? Anyway, new recording? How about this one? A new recording? Yeah, another machine, it's a new recording on here. I don't know what it is. It's a wild card. I apologized. Stop let me explain this. So you know, sometimes people call a wrong number. This woman called a wrong number, obviously, and she's apologizing to her friend for something and blaming people like you scary, so make it a little bit louder. This is the voicemail. I apologized that I even do it.

We report obviously they were even correct. Sorry because it turned out to be a beautiful dan. But I'll see each tomorrow morning, o'cock. So it's not even okay, so that's a wrong number. But I will say this, there was a day last week where they called for snow and then all of a sudden, everyone was left with egg on their face because it turned out to be a nice day. She was apologizing to a friend. She said it, don't blame me, it was a nice day to radio stations told me it was funny. Zoo crew.

How about that one Zoo crew. I don't let me see what this is, Oh Zoo crew. So this is Seth Meyers, who I fucking love doing his closer Look segment. Now the clip is political. I'm going to tell you that he's talking about um. The people that rioted in the Capitol mentioned him and as they were being filmed right, they mentioned his name. Endit a Ted Cruise. But he made it. He made an analogy and at the end he totally nails our morning show in describing it. So

and you'll hear it shout out Ted, congrats. That's like the Seditionoust version of getting the song dedicated to you by the Morning Zoo Cruise. This in direction goes out to Ted from Calgary. Thanks for helping us over through a democracy. Ted. They played the air horns where we've been using those the same the same exact air horns on our morning show. Seth Myers in goofing on Morning Zoo Morning Radio Crew type things played the air horn in making fun of Ted Cruise. I thought that was fun.

This is this is discreet. How about Okay, this is a commercial. This is where you want to get the Grammar Police jingle ready. This commercial is for a product called the Screet. I know it's called the Screet, but he still have to use proper gramm I can't play two banks at the same time. Sorry, you don't get the grand Police single. Didn't hit the Grammar Police jingle because I got a couple of grammar police clips. Here, you got the police? Uh, yeah, I do. I got

need seven million dollars. You can't play two clips, not at the same time, Dick. I got to get the grand Police jingle for you, so I did tell you to have it ready. It's ready. It's just in a different It's a sound bank, you Dick. What you got in your bank? I need seven million dollars for a alright, Grammar Police. But grammar police, We're good. Where is it? I can't wait for you? You know what you? Mike Friends says to stop scrolling. No, I gotta fine. I

gotta all the way back for this ship. What back back to back in time? Oh that's another clip time travel Grammer police, Police Police. Okay, this is gonna be a couple of grammar police. These are paid commercial. You got the Craig Robbins, yeah, and Alicia Keys play the Discreet. Now I gotta go all the way to the bank that has oh my god, schmucks kind of stupid bank. Is this all right? All right? Here we go. Nobody

likes adverbs anymore. Ahead new always discrete, boutique black. I feel protected all day, and if it's so discreet, you'd never know that. For bladder leaks, always discreetly. It fits discreetly, it doesn't fit discreet. Yeah, it's like when I see what she's trying to say, that she the problem. The problem is the product is called discreet, but in the way she used it in a sentence, it has it's right.

It's like when you said you did amazing black. I feel protected all day, and if it's so discreet, you'd never know that. Right now, you could say it is so discreet, But once you use fits, the discreet is the modifier to the word fits. She's I guess the writer should have said it fits it's it's so discreet, or the you know, but she said it fits the verb fits. Said okay, well, so you know, Praig Robinson, who we all love from the office, you're gonna know

right away because you're always guilty of this. Yep, I know where this is going to. I heard this one. Yeah, pizza hut Craig Robinson away bit, No, no, me and pizza hut. No, it's pizza. Somebody's got to say to him. So I I saw this commercial and said that I flagged it right away because I make this mistake all the time. The problem is in common English language lexicon, the way we are English language, the way we talk, the way most of them. But this is a commercial,

but the most this is a script. But he's trying to be relatable. He's trying to sell a product, you dick, So so he's like, you know what, I want to speak the way America speaks, so I could sell more of this thing. People who speak with bad grammar eat pizza hut. No. I'm saying that because the majority of Americans would talk like this guy. They said, you know what, I say a little bit of myself in this Craig Robinson speaks, and no one had the balls to go

up to Craig Robins away bit. We're playing this, you wouldn't say me go way back. You can't say me okay, okay. Alicia Keys, Alicia Keys has a new commercial. She does play it me and some amazing artists. No it's not because you wouldn't say me a playing We know the proper terminology. But once again, I'm gonna go back to Craig Robinson on that she's trying to speak. She speaks like she speaks, and that's Alicia Keys is better than that. I love Alicia Keys. She's better than that. Me and

some amazing art. No, me and some amazing Nope, okay, now we got we all love the movie Back to the Future of Okay, back to the Future is not about going to the past. It's about going to the past and then doing what going back to the future, which is our present, right, right, So he goes to the he goes to the fifties, and then has to go back to the eighties, which in the fifties is the future. Right, So back to the future is forward

time trial. Correct. But people always say, oh, I'm going back to the future when they're talking about going back in the middle. It's always hold on, hold on, don't hit the clip. But I'm still talking your bonehead. Now go back to the future before you played that. See it doesn't work. Okay, now this isn't This guy uses the turn back to the future in a way I've

never heard before. The first guy, Nate Burlison, good, good announcer, This is pretty super Bowl is talking to Iron Eagle, and Nate Burlison actually uses the right TV show analogy, right. He says that I did a show last week, Iron Eagle, with your son, just last week, and now I'm doing a show with you. And he says, it's like quantum leap. Now, quantum leap, you could jump around timelines right where you could have maybe right jumped into different situations. Right. Not

necessarily perfect analogy comparison, but okay. For some reason, doing a radio show with the guy's son last week and doing a radio show this week with the father got him to say this, I feel like I'm in the episode of Quots of Week because I work with just Noah and now I'm working with Iron. Yeah, this is the best I've ever We've gone back to the future here, oh Iron, you haven't. Don't anywhere. There's no time travel now.

He just wanted to fill it with some kind of reference to a show or a movie that that talks about time travel, gone to the past. He was just trying to make a random time travel reference, right, But people, everybody's like, oh, nice outfit, you're going back to the future. It's okay. He still makes a lot more money than us, so he gets to make those mistakes on national TV during the Super Bowl. His name is spelled Ian, but he pronounces it. He's a Brooklyn guy, by the way,

I know, and he's very talented. I've been listening to him for you from alright, So all right, we got one more. You know else is from Brooklyn. Rich Adam your mother. She is Adam Richmond, the guy who eats weird ship on TV. He's got a new show coming out. We're not not a sponsor. Adam Richmond work Richmond, Richmond, Richmond. He grew up in our in sheep said Bay, Brooklyn, where Rolling Roaster is where I mentioned we talked. He worked for me at Red Robin huh, and had been

to parties at my house. So I decided to finally tweet him, not to bother him because he's famous now, like hey, Adam, you know, like, hey, just congratulation on the new show. I got a blue check mark next to my name on Twitter, so I know he's going to see my tweet. What he says, Hey, remember Red Robin, the old days that three days now I haven't heard from him. Of course, now you're not going to him, okay, And now left later and then we gotta go. We gotta say see you later. Oh, I got this major,

major audio. We gotta go back to the future. We gotta go. I don't know where lived later is. Let me say, hold on live later. Okay. So I'm watching the news um cable news, and they and she says in the clip, she says, oh, the President is about to speak, right, okay, So they weren't going to cut away to him when he speaks. Here's what she says. I'll explain why she's wrong, and then we'll play it again. President Biden is making some remarks inside the oval right now.

According to that group of reporters in the room, we're gonna play that for you live when we get it. Then we're the problem right there, because you're not live. If you're gonna play it when that means it when we get it, that means we're gonna record it first, and you're not gonna hear it live. They're gonna but the only thing that they can do live is play it out in real time. So when they hit to it, when they demands. The president's inside the obe right now.

According to that group of reporters in the room, we're gonna play that free you live when we get it. That's physical possibility. Before you nitpick slices live. She's live, right, but you can't play it live even though you're live, you're not playing it. But you could play it live in real time like when we when we okay, when we play our phone taps in the morning, they're clearly prerecorded right on the big show on the elvist Man Show. If you listen, they're not but they're not live. But

I'm playing it live because it's not. What you're hearing is a live you know. I'm saying, it's in real time. I'm hitting the button. Would you how would you hitting the button live at when that goes on the radio. I'm playing it. I'm live playing would you okay, how would you play a funk tap not live? How would you show the show was prerecorded altogether and I wasn't playing it. I wasn't then hit the button right, but as it's playing, it's live in the moment. The point

is she sucked up. The point is, uh, when you're when you when we play music on the radio station. When when I hit this jingle right here here, I'm just gonna play this jingle right here here. That's not even a jingle. I'm not gonna I get anything. I'm playing it live, even though it's prerecorded sound you see, right. But what she was saying was, we're gonna play it for you live. How else could you play it for me?

I understand you being nitpicky whatever. Well, speaking of nipicky, I just want to get I want If you're on TikTok, there's uh, we don't have time for this right because'nna, I'll do it next week. Let's save it. We got. I got something else too that I didn't get to. A young girl. I think she lives in Canada. She

popped up in my four you page. And this video I didn't realize after the fact has two points seven million likes, okay um, and I like a million views and it's one of these I was today years old when I heard this, okay everything. She says that she just learned our fallacies. Remember we talked a couple of weeks ago. Whatever it was like, golf does not mean gentlemen, only ladies. Written. Okay, I gotta look up what that's called. It's like a false anagram or false Uh well, we'll

happen for next week. Why are you even teasing it? If we're gonna do it right here? I don't get you gonna tell you. I'm not gonna tell you the account. But when you hear this audio, wantun fun, you want you know, you want to throw your phone out the window. My god, oh my god, everything she says is wrong, and all the comments like, oh my god, it's brilliant. So boys from but you don't you know? You know

what she's from. Ship I choked into the bread. It's Brooklyn Da Boys, Brooklyn Brooklina Boys, brock Brooklas