#159: A Lotto Bullsh*t

person for one sixty. Yeah. Yeah, but you know, a pandemic. Pandemic. Well I can't. I gotta say, man, you don't want to come to my house anyway to do this podcast because it reeks like garlic in here. I thought it was onions. Yeah that was last night. Okay, So here's the problem. You live. We've established this in a one bedroom, one living room, one kitchen apartment, right, and so any

and you cook is gonna be everywhere in your house. Truth, there's no escaping it unless you put all your belongings into the bedroom and closed the door. Okay, so you didn't learn a lesson. You came to work today. I wasn't there, but everybody was saying that was there. That you wreaked of onions because your clothing, your jacket, absorbed the cooking onions smell, right, So why would you go with garlic tonight is tomorrow and night curry because it's

healthy for you. These are some strong pungent spices we're talking about. I mean, but you should put your coat in the closet, then I should, but I don't. It's draped over the chair which is facing the island from between my living room and my kitchen, which is about all about three feet so it's from the stove. So you're pretty much screwed. Pretty much screwed. But it's okay. Maybe you should grill on the on your little terrace,

like set up a little like a barbecue grill. Get out of here, crist out there to close the window, club door and be outside, and then the air from the cooking goes out into the your neighborhood. This is why we used to do it in Brooklyn, I mean not my house, because we we had a barbecue. We had a little bit of a back patty. It would have a barbecue on the fire escape. If you don't you known, you know the fire escape is it's it's the name tells you, but it's actually the fire escape ladder.

So apartment buildings, not giant skyscrapers, but you know, five six floor apartment buildings. You would have every apartment would have access on each side of the building, a couple on each side. Maybe if it was wide enough, you'd open one of your windows and they would be a platform with a ladder going up and down like a staircase, not a ladder, but a staircase, so you can get out of the house in case of a fire, right

a fire escape. Here's the here's the the kitch though the downside is the bottom of it is a as a straight ladder that you have to release from for the second floor and then climb down because if you left it down to the ground, people would climb up and rob you. There has to be has to be up in the air, so it was very difficult to get that ladder off. Sometimes. I don't think I've ever been on a fire escape ladder. I don't I know the one you're talking about. It's the one that hangs,

but I didn't know how to even release it. So right, you didn't grow up in an apartment building. If I was in a fire I'd beat charcoal because I wouldn't know how to like garlic. Yeah, pretty much. I found the body's garlic. It's scary, pretty dental records of the charred Nope, bit scary, but it's it's highly illegal to barbecue on a terrace anyway, on your fire escape. You don't want to do that. It depends when you do want to do it. But if you get my my in laws, I used to live on the Upper east

Side of Manhattan. They had a apartment in the sky. In the sky. I yeah, they had a corner apartment, and so the terrorists went out the side door and then wrapped around a little bit so you could have a grill out there because it was big enough. Well, you know, Upper east Side privileges. We didn't. We didn't

have that where we were. You know. In my father in law's defense, they had a house in Long Island that they bought when when the when houses didn't cost a lot in the eighties, and then you know, twenty years later or five years later maybe they bought in the seventies, they sold the house and bought an apartment. He doesn't live there anymore. That apartment. Now you probably couldn't couldn't touch it. Well, it was the same price of the house. I gotta say, though, grilling, grilling outside,

oh there's nothing like it. I mean, there's so many things that I would love to cook, but I have to. I'm forced to do this in here in my apartment, and so I put stuff on the stove and I try and flavor things up. Which is why, by the way, onions in garlic, because you just want stuff to like be you just wanted to. I don't know, it's a different preparation of it. It's a good terrible I mean, And don't tell you that the George forming grill. I

know we've been there, done that, had it. I wasn't gonna tell you about that, not you know, I'm talking about the slices. Yeah, well, yeah, they're not. You know, I have an idea for tomorrow's meal. So you don't stink up the whole house. Why don't you prep some chicken breasts, roll them in your coat sleeves and you'll get the garlic smell, will be ready to go. You don't have to add me more garlic. It's perfect. You just rub them up on the sleeves. Some people have

sensitive noses. I came to work today with that jacket on from the onions from last night Scotty b from our big show spot like right away, it was like follow his nose. It always knows like, oh my god, scary reeks. So whatever, I don't know, I just did. There's no solution for me. I don't live in a big house. Sorry, that's it. And you can washer and dryers in the basement. No, it's it's in the closet right here, next to next your apartment. Okay, you could have.

You could have, you know, rinsed off the jacket Washington, who cleans jackets on their own. If I'd smelled like onions and garlic, I would to send it. Let them handle it and handle it. They're gonna charge you extra for stink. You know that, dude, All the money I spent on this equipment and squandered all that, you know, Okay, I could, I could could. Before we get to the equipment, I bought one two. I want to say three, Hold on one two. I thought it was three new things.

I'll say two new things from my my basement set up here, and one of them I was able to expense for work, so I really only paid so last week I talked about the shitty headphone cable I had so h just at that moment we lose Brody. How classic is that. It sounds like you're in a worse position than you were in last week because you just disconnected the whole thing. Holy sh it. This guy, I swear to God, was that Are you doing a bit? I wonder if he's doing a bit because he's not

connected at all. He's totally gone. Actually the line is connected, but he unplugged his mic. Somehow something fell on his head. Oh my god, I see him trying to log back in. He did something really fucked up. Anyway, Um, in the meantime, you could email us at the Brooklyn Boys Podcast at gmail dot com. We're gonna read to the email a little while, and we have some things to get to. I wanted to talk about, Oh look at you. Let me let me tell you. I was vamping. You know,

we called it damping. I heard you. I uh, but just irony. That was irony. No, I would see what was in the middle of a sense. What I just did now was irony and coincidence. And I just pulled

off the double I'll tell you why. I was in the process of telling you about the new cable I got from my microphone, and my had my uh my headphones, and I was telling you about my new set up here, and so coincidentally, at the same time as I was telling you my I knocked my phone off the little table here and it landed on the bottom of the cable, not the headphone cable, but the cable that connects to the headphone to the microphone. And once you unplug the microphone,

it kills the connection. Even if you plug it back in, you have to reset the connection. So that the irony was it happened while I was talking specifically about my new system. I said, this is classic, this is great. That first I was doing you were doing a bit. It was so perfectly placed. No, I when I did it, I went, oh, I get that's fun. Oh shit, I really did it, so uh no, yes, So that's what happened.

So I got a docking station from my laptop so that the laptop now clicks into this, and then I plugged the cables into that, so I have instant everything set up with that and go with that. Right. So I got that and that was expensed because it's a it's a a work expense. And because I'm used in the company laptop and then the headphone cable last week was terrible. I returned that one to Amazon. I found the Monster cable that I needed for the Monster heaphone,

and I got that from Amazon as well. Amazon great company, as far as like when you need something, great shipping all of that stuff. Right, it's the word I've talked about. This the absolute worst search engine in the world. You can put in Monster headphone cable and it will show you Monster's energy drink, right, Monster Energy Drink. It will show you monster stuffed animals, It'll show you cables, it'll show your headphones. But you can put in in parentheses

or quotes, it doesn't matter. It will not search for what you want, just what you want. If you put in blue USB three cable, it doesn't. It gives you whatever it wants because it was like, he'll probably buy something else, even if we're given the wrong ship. It's the worst search engine imaginable. But once you like dig and dig and dig and find the right combination of words and arch for it does nothing. If you search right. Let's say you search for something and it gives you

a hundred seventy five results. Okay, then you said, I want to search only four stars. Four stars are better reviews, and then it gives you a hundred one hundred one results. So then you say, okay, you know what, I want to price them low to high. Now I already have my hundred one results. I want to price those hundred one results load of high. When you sort by load of high, all of a sudden you have forty results? What's that? Like? Where's the rest of them? Right? Where's

the rest of them? It you feel like you're you're you're being cheated or you you can't do you can't do multiple settings, multiple filters. And I think that when they when you get the rating and the price and you put them both in, they don't want you to buy certain things, like they don't want you to buy the cheap good ones show. Yeah, it's just Camboni, is what it is. They want you to buy the expensive ones with the high rating. So that's what I think.

That's what you think. Yeah, So I was telling you, Uh, I think I was going from my phone because I did we mentioned Scamboni. Did I say Scamboni? Right? And just now you did. I did, yeah, but I had a I have a scamboni for today's show. So there you go. We'll get to that in a second. I guess um, you know, I I'm really reeling from my an Instagram post I made a couple of days ago. I'm gonna I'm about to pull out another jingle we haven't heard in a long time. It's this one. It's

snow and it is January. Brodie. Oh yeah, have a snow flight. Oh yes, I do. Lettics no lettics, no lettics. No. We have a snowflake or two who arrived on my Instagram the other day. I posted a video. Now we're all familiar with those cakes, those designer cakes that people make that look like that looks so lifelike, you know, they look exactly like the thing, and a lot of times you get psyched out and then all of a sudden, the person cuts it and it's a piece of cake.

So there was If you look at my Instagram, Brodie, and you tell me what kind of dog that is, there's a video of a dog, a white dog, and it's I guess uh, it's the one that gets all wrinkly, the wrinkled dog, the sharp past sharpey. It was a sharp brown though, well whatever it is, it was a white dog. And take a look. The only white sharp pay was in high school musical Okay, anyway, you don't get that, but anyway, yeah, so so if you look, if you look at the video and it's a it's

a bulldog. It's a bulldog. I don't know my breeds of dogs. Come on, don't funk with me, come on, stop. Anyway, the dog was there, it was it was like it was a but it was a cake. Right, So, so all of a sudden, the first opening shot, as you see a person or you say, you see a knife slicing down the middle of its face ace and then you see being cut across and then it pulls out the cake. Really, it pulls it out really quickly. You realize, oh my god, it's not a real dog. It's a cake.

Ha ha. I've been fooled again, like I have a million times on these freaking videos. Right, But then it cuts to a real live dog that is witnessing this entire fright. And then dog's eyes is balding out of its head like wing like literally cartoonish like me. Next it was so fucking funny. But yet Brodie reiterate, I had fucking snowflakes on my fucking feet. Oh, how could you do that. That's terrible, it's awful. It looks so real. I can't believe it. There's something that's not a right

about this. And some of these people I actually deleted other others I went back and I'm like, are you serious? It's only cake? And then I can't take it's just there's it's so right. And they weren't saying, oh, that's wrong and laughing. They were saying it's wrong, take it down, um, because they were fooled into thinking was it's so lifelike. That's not a that's not a reason. That's not a reason. I mean, it's it's it's fucking cake. At the end of day, it's a cake. Okay, they're not taking a

knife to a real dog. It is a very real looking dog. It's a very real looking dog. But your mind is playing a trick on you. And once you realize, oh, it's cake. And then the funny part at the end where the real dog is like watching like with their eyes bulging out of their head, it's hysterical. I it's it's frightening, it's jolting and then hilarious at the same time. But don't come at me with because say, oh my god, that's so wrong that you posted that. You know that's

harming dogs. It's not. It's not real people. How do people immerse themselves? There was an article and then I think it was the New York Post yesterday neighbors complained that that a man was barbecuing. Now there's really no good answer to this. They're trying to figure out if he was barbecuing a dog or a coyote. Neither is legal, apparently, No, that's what That's what they were they were looking into. But that's real. This is this is a sharp pay

that happens to look lifelike. But it's a cake or a sharp whatever the hell it is. A bulldog. I don't even know what it's a bull French bulldog. Maybe you know what I'm saying. But why do people so fucking but heard about this ship. I don't know. I I can't figure people. I can't. Everyone's offended by everything you know that you know, and they take it too seriously.

I'm not gonna get into what I posted. I posted something that was an obvious joke yesterday maybe the day before, and somebody got me back and they're like, that's not funny. How could you joke about that? Or and then one person said that's not accurate, and I said, it's a joke. It's it's clearly, it doesn't have to be accurate. It's a joke. It's a freaking it is. They thought it was serious, they thought it was real, so like, that's not you know, and it wasn't a follower of mine.

I it was a trending topic, I think, and so that you know, the trolls they hit the trending topics and they want to comment and everything. So I did want to talk about a scamboni, but I have to try remember what the scamboni was, alright, because um, Kathy Volan broke b R O E K catbird six to five. I said something about a scamboni and she said, what's a scamboni? So I said, obviously it was a Brooklyn boy.

She said, I knew that was coming. Not every day when unable to at work, I catch a few, you know, each day. So she's way behind. Um, so I said, well you need to catch up. I said, easy, to tell you what a scamboni is. You'll you'll hear it when we get up to it. But the first full letters are scam and then the bony part is the Brooklyn eyed version of scam. It's like it's a scam Marino skim run. No, you know, it's like scam. It sounds like pasta. It sounds like you and get a

scam boning. It sounds like right, like a strombol or strombo or Kyle's yeah, right exactly. That's why that's why we did it. Did she get it after you explained it? Yeah? Yeah, she was fine. Um uh, you know, I wish I had the sound to this, but uh god, you got the sound I wanted, right that sound you wanted, Yes, I have, But scamboni jingle ready after this because I know what Garrett Garrett uh from our Big show. He was talking about Punksitani Phil the groundhog, the famous groundhog

that lives in a library. How do you sleep? How do you sleep? After this? I would be his hand, the handler to punc Sitani Phil the groundhog is making money off of the groundhogs bones on cameo. You know, cameo is the personalized greetings greetings. Yeah, so you can pay most celebrities a certain amount of money, right, people celebrity, like if they're all I don't know if ed Shearing's on it or not, but I'm saying ed Sheering right.

If Ed Shearon was on it, you pay Ed Sheeron, let's say a thousand dollars and he'd say, hello, Maria, your friend John wanted me to wish you a happy birthday. It's Ed Sheering. You're paying them for greetings, right, thank you, so thank you, beautiful Ed Sheering. So it's probably more like the Beatles. I think it's more like a Beatle's English. I was a little bit hell hello, hello mate, Hello, hello mate, as opposed to like Harry Potter. You know,

I'm bad with accents like what were you doing? I don't know. It sounds like you're doing like an Irish top of them autem and yeah, I'm bad with that ship. That's why I don't go there. You don't hear you, You'll never hear me. Really try accents like that on this phone taps you do on phone taps? Yeah, but they were because your Italian sounds Mexican and your Indians sounds Italian dobe, they're not real there. I just I

don't know. I'm bad, right. So my point on this is is is puncitani Phil, it's his freaking it's his life. This handler just picked up this freaking thing and says, ha, I'm the handler and he's making all this money. He's making bank by doing video greetings, saying oh, so he's there with him. The groundhog is right, that was my next question. But I'm gonna find myself a chipmunk, not a chipmunk, a groundhog hog. Yeah, and I'll do it.

I'll say, yeah, I'm a booksta fills backup trainer. I just don't think right to do that to make this money. I mean, who is he? You know? You know what. Here's what I'm gonna say, and then this will solve your First of all, you're upset because he makes more than you for a cameo. Well he's charging eight, right, which is more than you charge. At the moment, you're

gonna you're gonna raise your rates. By the way, I'm offline, by the way, I decided to uh yeah, because I'm getting emails they want me to sign up for the big Valentine's Day push coming up. Yeah, I've been getting those emails to hit the ignore button. I'm gonna get I'm gonna give you a word of advice. Guys, ladies. You also, if either one of you, let's say, wants to pay me for a Valentine's Day greeting for your loved one, you might not need a gift next Valentine's Day.

That's not a gift that's gonna keep your relationship going. Oh you sent me a brody Valentine's say, Hey, Roses Red Violence of Blue, I'm Brody from the Brooklyn Boys and this has all he got you Valentine's Day, Right, That's that's not yours. And I'm not I'm not look, i'm not. I'm not helping myself make money here. I'm just being honest. I'm just being honest. Well, I'm just being honest that I think I think these are Scamboni's

a lot of them. Like but if you're someone if but if you're someone who's hiring of all the celebrities, and there's thousands of a list celebrities, a lot of people people like me and scary, Uh, that's corect Grammer who are like f G level celebrities Uh, you can get anybody. You're gonna have the trainer for Pus and Tony Phil. That's like, oh, the guy who drew a cartoon you like, right, Like, oh, he was an animator on finding Nemo. I want to go. No, you don't,

don't pay him? Yeah, And if he's holding a drawing of Nemo, are you gonna pay for it? That's the same as Puck to Phil. That's he's holding a groundhog allegedly, listen, Puks Tony Phil. Those things don't last very long. They die every couple of right, so why would anyone It's always a different, it's a different And it's like Lassie the Dog. Lassie they been making last Sie movies don't make it any more, but they made lasting movies for like forty years. And yeah, and not like it's not

the groundhog is actually gonna just miraculously talk. I mean that i'd pay double for if anything. Worse than paying for that is showing your friends look look like I paid eighty dollars and I got my girlfriend a greeting from the trainer. The trainer, Hey, guess what if the groundhog sees its shadow, It's six more years of you being a loser living in your mom's house. That's right, That's what that means. Could have had Michael Jordan, could

have had Floyd Midweather. You're not getting Floyd bad Weather is a thousand. He's on there. Yeah, okay, so you Wethers a thousand, yeah, then you know, yeah, probably he's not on there. I got, I got, I got two scambonies for you. I can throw a scam for you. So I am currently in the market for a new washing machine, okay, and I have an off shoot story coming off the washing machine story. So, um, I'm gonna pull that up because that's that's big. I'm gonna pull

up my my, my scamboni and a washing machine. Um, and so I it's it's it's stops sometimes in the middle of the wash, and so there's something that's it can't be fixed. It says there's too many SuDS, but there's no SuDS and you have to like put it rense cycle and it's fine. So every once in a while you think your wash is done and it's not. Okay, So of course I call it. This is not not a sponsor. I call our friends at PC Richard's son and hey, guys, you gotta sail on on Washington drawers. Um,

you know, what do you recommend? And they sent me a couple of they recommended a couple of items, and uh, you know, they usually do right by me. They might they might throw me free shipping, you know, like delivery, you know, because deliveries money and then free shipping. Free shipping closes deals all the time. I've learned that that people hear that and their ears perk up and like, okay,

I'm in right, yeah right. It's like, look, we'll give you free delivery because they do us a favor because they used to advertise with the morning show and we've made friends with a lot of the guys over there. Not like, you know what, we'll give you free delivery and free hook up. You may be saving me fifty bucks. And so I shopped there because they have a great assortment. I love them. This isn't a commercial anyway. So I went to look at the at one of the models

that I was interested in. I wanted to look like rather than just buy it offline. I was right near one of the stores near my house. I went into Go Right Sales. Guys helped me. They showed me the model and uh, the price was I want to say six eighty. It was something like six eighty. You follow me so far? I okay. So on my way home, I had to do a couple of returns at home Depot, which is not far from where I was. So I go to home Depot to do the returns, and my

wife wanted a light for the grill. We have a grill so the onion stink stays outside. So I'm looking for the grill light and I said, you know what, they have a washro and drying department here. I know I'm going to get a better price at PC Richard. But let me see what the same washer and dryer. The washer is at home Depot, so I see it. It's right by the front, the same model that I want. Considerably. It was five okay, so I'm like, whoa wa, this is great. It's got a yellow it's his clearance. So

I'm like, okay, they're discontinuing this model. This is great. I'm sorry it was six six it was at PC Richard. Sorry. Um, and so it's five forty so I'm like, that's eighty dollars right. That doesn't not look PC original match it. I'm not right about that. So I'm looking. I'm going wow, I said, So, I said, excuse me, call the salesperson over. I said, this is five forty. Yeah, I said, is this model discontinued? It's on clearance. This is great. How

much is delivery figuring? If I'm getting free delivery at six whatever, twenty whatever? I said six? When I say, right, I see how much delivery is. It may be almost the same price. So the guy says, oh, there's no delivery on that what uh? He says, it's clearance. I said, but but but but he says, no, it's only free delivery if you get it from the factory. We're selling that one right there. So I said, so, how would I get at home? I don't know. That's the scam

right there? Would you guys hook it up? No, nope, we don't deliver or hook up the U the floor model. You know they do that. They'll deliver anything, anytime, anywhere. Right again, not a commerce commercial. I'm not a commercial sponsor myself. We're not getting paid for this. Now. I gotta rent the truck. So yeah, for five forty, I can rent the truck somehow, find someone to help me with it. Every time the truck, get it into my house, down the steps, hook it up myself. Five forty five forty?

Who's that price for Joe Plumber? Like, Hey, I'm Joe Plumber. I'm taking half of five forty. Who's buying that? Now? Somebody listening, what do you slices? Like I gotta f one fifty and a ramp and I was rubbing that right up. I got it. I'm not that guy. I admire you if you're the guy that's got the truck and the ramp and the lift and the cables and the back brace and all that that's beautiful, and the hand truck when you get home. I don't have any

of that. So now we'll come to Grand. Doesn't come now looking at the Grand to get to get all this stuff and the wheels and the roll and the Please tell me you went in and you you canceled the order or you didn't you didn't buy it and you went back to our friends at PC. Oh, of course I'm buying it a PC. I was gonna say. I mean, there's I was only looking to see because I wanted to see how much money I was saving. Now the full price on that washing machine the one

that's that's six twenty was six eight nine. It was like more but the clearance one. I was like five forty. Oh my god, I'll take it right. Oh no, no, that's to me, that's a that's a scamboni, right, it is a. It wasn't. Did you just hit the wrong jingle the wrong I was on the wrong sound bank. We suck, but I one. Now I feel like I owe a scary inappropriate because I played them. Don't slip

it in yet. I got another scamboni. Um. So my doctor recommended I take probiotics, right because I was having an upset stomach. He's like, you should take probiotics. Here, that up for you. So I go to Walgreens. You know where we're forced to go. Now, yes, we know that one the scam, the major scamboni right, Okay, So I say to the woman, Uh, listen, I need probiotics, like a line or something, right, That's what my doctor said to get It was either a line or something else.

It was two different companies. She's, oh, we we have a line. I get. So when you go to the drive through at Walgreens, if you want one thing, they'll run into the store for you grab it and then give it to you the drive through. This is the drive through, by the way. We had all the problems that I've talked about before. So I said the woman, can you get me what just do you want the generic? What do you want the name brand? I said, well, if the generic is is a lot less, that's fine,

but if you know, let me know. So she comes back and she says, oh, uh, I got you the name brand. The line it was twenty two dollars, but the generic was only twenty one, and I figured for a dollar more, you'd want the name brand, I said. I said, oh all right, no, no, that's fine for dollar all right, I'm gonna I'm I'm not gonna get out of there. She to me the favor for a dollar. I'm like, okay, I get the name brand. Not a problem. So I get home and it was scary for fourteen pills. Yeah, okay,

so you gotta take uh to a day. The doctor had me on. So I got a week out of it roughly right. Okay. So after the week is up, I'm still not feeling regular. So I called my doctor. He says, you need you need to stay on there. On the probiotics another couple of weeks, so I go back to Walgreens popping placebos there. What were you doing there, Bertie? No, so I go. I go back to the Walgreens a couple of days later, and I'm in the store this time,

so I'm not in the drive too. I had to go in the store for something, and I look at the probiotic. It's twenty two dollars for fourteen pills. It's a lot of money. And I see the knockoff the Walgreen's name brand in the orange box is twenty one dollars, just like she said, except for one I get one pills. Oh really, yeah, so it wasn't one dollar more, it

was one dollar more and seven dollars less. Seven. Now they got to be back in the store after fourteen pills when I could have gotten twenty one dollar lest double check it. You didn't double check it because you were because it was continued, so PESHI said, in uh lethal weapon. They fuck get the drive, drove the drive always. They always fun that right there is why I refuse to insta cart and and all these companies coming to

my house shopping the groceries for me. They will never ever do as good or a thorough job as I would in person. We've talked about this in this podcast, to where they don't where they don't give you the freshest stuff. They just grab us up front. You know you got to reach in the back because that's the stuff that's the freshest, right, And they packed from back to front, and you know damn well that they're not

shopping for your best interest. Guess what it needs to car person would have given me the same freaking pills that you got, absolute fucking lutely. Yeah, all right, we got one more quick break. Okay, right after this, right after this, right after this, no this, or you can go with this, or you can go with that. Well this scary. Have you ever used a shipping calculator online? A shipping calculatory calculator? Of course? Yeah, it's always in its usually on the site. Yeah all right. So my

wife sells something and she wants to ship it. She selld it on on Facebook to an out state resident and she says, uh, ship my pants ships? Can you can you box it up? Take it over to the ups store? I said, sure, says you know what, let me check, let me check all the prices. Let me see UPS because it was going to um uh, Washington State, so cross the country from New Jersey. Right, She's let me see who has the cheapest rates. So she goes on online. She does the FedEx, UPS USPS and she says,

all right, UPS is the cheapest. Okay, I measured the box one by nine by five. It's uh four point two pounds whatever comes out that the shipping was, I want to say sixteen and change. Uh, USPS was eighteen and FedEx was nineteen. Give a take. So UPS is the cheapest. It's it's sixteen dollars and change. So I go in with the box. I showed them the address, she says, she puts it in TOPS in the address

and change. I said, there must be a mistake. I used your online shipping calculator and uh it said sixteen and change. So there must be a mistake. She says, you use the UPS shipping calculator. Well, yeah, that's what I'm talking about. Why would I use like Mike's shipping calculator. I used UPS shipping calculator. She oh, did you use the UPS smart shipping calculator on the website. Yeah? Yeah. Now now I'm feeling good now, feeling like, yeah, I've

answered your questions. I did what you wanted. I in fact used the smart shipping calculator. Just oh that's the problem. I'm sorry. Yeah, that's corporate and their prices are different. I don't know why why are they showing I said, what are you a franchise? What what do you It wasn't like, you know, like those Verizon stores. It's like Joe's Electronics and it has a Verizon sign on it. Of course they paid to me there, right, but there

were actual Verizon stores. And when you go into those fake Verizon stores, got your phone right as your phone about No, aren't they do you want an accessory? You want to call charger? Yeah, at your phone because they're just a franchise or they just bought the logo and name and it's it's legal, but they get to run their own local deals and yeah, so you're Alexei's Alexei Cellular. So they calculators. There's two shipping calculators in the same sho.

I said, I saw, I said to I go, So I said, well, how smart is the smart shipping calculator? If it isn't smart enough to give me the right price. Sounds like pretty stupid to me. Yeah. So she looks at me like she doesn't understand, like she doesn't get the joke. I'm trying to be sarcastically annoying. She didn't get the joke. She just got the annoying. So I said, well, why would I pay five dollars more? Why is your

website off? Yeah? I really don't know. So I said, how do I know you're not checking up the price? How do I know you're not checking up the scale? You don't know that. I don't know any of that. You're flying here? Yeah, so I did. My wife is texting me, I gotta go good, I did, I gotta go, I gotta go. You what is the purpose of having an online calculator? I didn't like. They didn't say what size of the package, and I said, it's approximately. What is the way it could be? I wait, I have

a I have a male scale. I'm not guessing the gender of my scale. It could be a female scale. I don't know. So I waited. I waited the posted scale. I put the thing on. I measure with an actual tape measure right New York Jets tape measure that maybe why it was wrong. I don't know. It can't be you know, can't be too careful and I bring, oh yeah, it's five dollars more. You're talking about a thirty percent

roughly difference. That's almost a third more. That's crapf you fu ups store and you swat shipping calculates it fu ups or f ups f You know what I can overlap them? I could. I could do like logo where the whether you is yeahs fops, Well, like FedEx like it's fucking fucking ed x. You can't like funk at x. You can't do that fun FedEx FedEx FedEx Yeah, and then uh fastus would be fun usps. Who's texting you? You gotta be fucking kidding me. Oh my god, it happened.

It happened again. No, no, Brodie, this is gonna fucking burn you two. Everything burns me. Okay, it's Girl Scout Cookie season. Nope, here it comes. You mentioned this on the Big Show today, and people have been sliding into my d m s. Not just kids, not kids, moms of kids saying my daughter, here's they They lead with my daughter is selling your daughter, then have your daughter sell it. But you are selling it to me right now, so and then so now because you can't you know,

visit each other in person very much. Right, So they're putting they're just throwing the link out there. All they're doing is spreading around the link for the corporate uh you know Girl Scout website. Of course, maybe the troop gets I think the troops. You put the number in whatever, did you know how much for a five dollar box of cookies? The troop gets fifty cents a box, all right, So that's the first that's another scamboni right there. The

rest goes to Girl Scouts of America. It's corporation, it's a business. Uh, it's not all the same price, no, I know. But they only made fifties seventy cents the local troop, does you know? Now, I'm seventy cents. Leave me alone and don't sell cookies in January when everyone's trying to lose weight. Terrible time, terrible time. Sell me the cookies in November when I'm shoving food in my mouth left and right. Yeah, bad planning. No one knows

the market, that's terrible market. First quarter of scary is not buying and I'm not even looking at Girl Scout cookies, fourth quart of scary, back the truck off. But this is a new level. Where the truck was fourth quarter scary, not the cookies. But this is a new level of audacity. And that is people now group texting, not even get a private text. It's a group text where hey, so my daughter is selling Girl Scout cookies. Here's the form and it's just an online form. Here go to this site.

But you mean it's it's there's no effort and it's a thirty at night. What did it takes? She put a group a group message together. She probably was like people in her contacts now, not relation on you to this person, just a third level friend. Uh more of I don't I don't want to offend this person. Oh god, it's somebody who works at the radio station in the alright, yeah, you know what. You outed someone from the sales department

a couple episodes ago. But you know I'm not going to add her this one here she says, like, could you help my daughter? Okay, if I could know, you know what, I want your daughter. I want your daughter to come here and ring my belly ring in the pandemic in the pandemic yeah, ring with you know, you put the effort in. Now buy your cookies. Here's what's worse.

Remember engineered Jeff second quarterscery would like cookies, not first quarter. Uh, Engineer Jeff curmudgeon, grumpy uh, backbone of the radio station in New York. He runs it, fixes it, repairs it, corrects it. He keeps them up, flips it and rub it, rubs it down, and he reverses it's he puts your thing. No, no, that's different. I know I just tagged it on that. I just tagged it on. I was combined and I tagged it I tagged a tag team. Tag team back again. Continue.

By the way, have you seen them in the mire? It is the commercial. Those guys have gained some weight they have they're making dessert. They both gained weight equally, so it's like they're both like flap team. If you don't know what we're talking about, it's a tag team. Woom there. It is a song from the nineties. Google it there in the new Geico commercial or whatever it was. Yeah, yeah, cooking dinner and they're making dessert. Okay, anyway, going right, So Jeff, Jeff is a like he's kind of a

grumpy guy, only like he's fun. He's like, yeah, what's broken? Now? What do you guys need? What do you guys mess up? Right? It's always like belligerent, okay, what was so important? But when his daughter was selling girls cuties, he come in with the big sales pitch. All right, guys, you got my cookies cookies and my daughter selling cookies. You know, he got me shifter and cheery. It wasn't like, hey, guys, listen, I need a favor. You know, my daughter's adorable. Here's

a picture. He wasn't. He wasn't elated, he wasn't enthusiastic. He stopped putting in the effort. The little girls come in, they're like, hi, would you buy girl scout guies in me? You're like, all right, look fine. He's like, yeah, you're gonna buy some cookies and I might fix your control board death. All right, you want something to the best is passed and wrap has the sheet around. I'll be back later. Right, he would leave the sheet. He's like, yeah,

you want your your voice processing the work. You buy some docy does I'll be back then. I thought that was the worst sales pitch. But a group text message it doesn't get anything. That group text message. That's what this is. Hold on, I'm counting how many people are on here. It's gotta be at least fourteen fifteen people on this thing. Yeah, and uh, scary, you learned something

yesterday about group text messages, didn't you? I did, all right, So check this UM so so users and I'm obviously an iPhone users and we are in a group chat on the morning show with like fourteen of us. We're buying lottery tickets. Holy crap. Hold on, let me I got a text scotty because I didn't send the money. So yeah, so tell the story I did. So anyway, I was responding, I wanted to send how did this go? Brodie? Because you ended up you ended up telling me the

right way to do it on an android. Apparently from an android you could take You can say the same message, and you can send it to several different parties at the same time, but individual individually like blind copy, right, So I can send it a message to twenty people. Each of those people will get the message, but only to them. What was it that made you say, Hey, scary,

you know you can do this? And I'm like, I can't I hate I hate being in group chats with iPhone people because they have, first of all, they have to apply to everybody. Even if it's not a question, everyone needs the answer to, right, just reply back to That's what a group chat is, Brodie. I understand that we're all in a virtual room together and we're all okay. And I'm not talking about this particular group, but a lot of times when you're in a group, the people

will say, like, hey, um, who's watching this TV show tonight? Right? The whole room doesn't give a ship? Only one person asked the question. So text the guy back who asked the question. I am and be done with it. I don't need to know the other thirteen people what they're

doing tonight. I don't give a ship. But what's worse is when you're an Android user, is when somebody happen likes a comment that, like we talked several times on this podcast, I don't want it right, So I said the scary dude, just why don't these people just write Scottie back? Why do they all have to like put thumbs up and check marks and hearts and everything. I don't like. My phone's going crazy. I'm driving in the

call just right to get back. But one thing that I uncovered during this and I forgot what the scenario was, was that that was the scenario. Scenario was the scenario was. I responded back to the group when apparently you can tell you could text people. You could take the same message and send it to all these people individually, so you could start private chats right away. It's it's it's

hard to explain. Really, I don't know. I don't understand what I'm saying, Like, Okay, something you can do Android. But Android has the option of you can send either a group text where everyone's in the group together, or you can send a mass text where each person gets it in. That's what I'm saying. I wanted to send a mass text individually, right, And you like the girl Scout text you just got if you want or if anyone replies back to that text message, we're all going

to get Everyone is going to get that bullshit. Now you're gonna know that Mary's buying some you know, is the moment that Mary breaks off and gets in a private conversation, which you hope she's not gonna I always mentioned her name, right, You would think that to apply all people. It's to apply all people, but it depends. I mean, if you have a group chat with your friends going for the last two years, it's just like

you're all hanging out in the room. I'm sitting on the couch, You're in the kitchen, the other guy's taking a dump in the bathroom, and we're all just kind of talking to each other. And and I may and I may not be talking to you, but I may be talking to my buddy j over here. And then but if you hear it, it's okay. You're still in the room and you have ears, so you're listening, so it doesn't matter. I could still talk to Jay in

front of you. That's what a group chat is. So you really shouldn't be offended by people passing comments around. It's only in the case where you just said, where send a mass text individually to each person so they all respond back to you privately. Right, that's the situation, And that makes sense for what you're saying. But you know, but you have to have an Android and you've got to point out that in five years this feature maybe coming to the ipace. Yes, And that's the reason why

Apple covers your fucking face up. If you listen on Apple podcast, the logo is over my the logo, the Apple logo is on Brodie's face. And I'm fine with that. I'm fine with it. I don't I don't. I don't need my face. My voices makes the money for me. Uh. I just I just have I just something came up that that's hold on. Let me see what you wrote back and I'll tell you what's going on. Ye happening in the background. Okay, So Scotty on our show, we

mentioned him earlier. He buys the lottery tickets for the power Ball and whatever. The other one is the Mega millions, right, and we've been chipping in for a week and a half now. Everybody chips in twenty dollars, right, but if anybody wins, that's twenty dollars. Times are fourteen of us or ten of us whatever it is, you're you're increasing the odds. So first of all, we're on the today talking about how we're all gonna chip in and you have to get the money before two o'clock to Scotty,

and some of the money is in the pot. We're rolling it in. On a second, I'm gonna voice text to be you rolled in sixty four dollars of my money, so a couple of those tickets are mine or I'm in on a couple of them. Okay. He took the winnings from the last group, but you're not in on this group. Is that what you're saying? Okay? So I didn't get two o'clock today. I was glued to the television and then I had to run aarons what my

kids and i'd stuff to do? I forgot okay. Um, So I just texted him and I said, is it too late to get in? Right? Because I don't know if he went yet. He probably went, but I was like, I'll just check. He said it's too late to get in. So I wrote back and I said, damn. Now I have to hope you'll lose. Yeah. Why why was he when you want you betting against him? Well? But I

had so. So here's the thing, scary. Do I root for you guys to win and I'm fun because I didn't give the money, Or do I root for you guys to lose so that we're all back in it again for the next drawing, Because if you guys win, I'm gonna be like suicidal I think I think the first I think the first way is because we're all gonna probably chip in and give you some kind of a We could do a pity fund for Brody. Yeah,

pity fund. You'll all throw me a thousand dollars so I'll get I'll get ten thousand dollars instead of my like twenty million dollars share. That's not right, So am am I wrong? You understand what I'm saying. I have to root against you guys, But however, you do haven't in here? You do have? You have an argument because we took some of the winnings from the last round sixty and we rolled it in. So who's to say

which would have been the winning ticket if we win tonight? Right, because you're part of that sixty four dollars some of that was your pay out, right, Hang on, second, hold on, So technically you need to take sixty four dollars worth of those tickets and separate them out. And I'm in on those. Take a picture of them now, right because that's my money. I'm actually I agree with you on that. So there you go. You're in. No, that's gonna be a problem tomorrow. Well, double topic, that's gonna be on

the radio. We're gonna talk about this. By the time you hear this podcast, we will have already done a double topic. So the double topic is number one. Part of that money's mine, even though I didn't chip in an extra twenty uh a third a quarter of them, and I'm in on. I chipped in the sixty who's to say which He's gonna have to separate them ahead of time, right, I said, I said take a picture now, I said, take out sixty four dollars worth of tickets, take a picture of them, and I'm in on those.

That's that's legitimate. It is, it is, it is, it's absolutely and you're you're within your you know you're right to do that. I'm not everybody. If everybody chipped in twenty dollars, right, let's say there's nine, that's one eight. If you had the sixties to forty so tickets, I'm in on. I'm gonna call him right now, by the way, that's a dick move, by the way, to him to tell you it's too late and shut you down. You're

part of this office. Let's tell him. You want to yell at him, No, I want to tell him take it on the tomorrow. We'll get him on the phone right now. We'll get him on. I'll get him right on if he wants to talk on the phone. The last time he didn't answer. Okay, let's see if you will. I don't know he owes us. All right, we promote serial killers day and night, night and day. Why don't you promote that right now for us? Tom that's the serial killers. As I'm done dialing him, well, he can

do it. I want him to hear the plug so he knows I'm plugging his podcast. Okay, if I plug it now, I don't get credit. He's not gonna hear it. Okay my credit. Yeah, you three point nine millions. By the way, you just spend another thousand dollars at least on that piece of equipment that's made for radio stations, your vox Pro system. You had to have it at home. I did. I did. And it needs to und needs to run windows though. Okay, what's your what's you're doing?

It's like a mechanic buying a hydraulic lift for his garage at home. How do you feel lift cars up? How do you figure? Because you don't need this? This is this is radio equipment for a radio station. You just like being a dork at home and having all the gadgets. We do radio. This is what we do for a living. Yes, I do radio. I'm on a folding table, uh, an expense docking station and a nine dollar chord from Amazon and a microphone that Elvis born. But don't you want to I've talked about this on

the last podcast. Don't you want to invest in your future? You're gonna be doing this from the future. My talent is my future. I don't need to get it fancy equipment. Okay, get him on the phone. He's not going to answer. He's not gonna answer. He's probably asleep. Maybe he's jerking off. He does a lot of that. Okay, Now my family's home is gonna be bloking. Of course he's not gonna answer now, so you jinxed it? All right? I told Hi, answer the phone. Are you calling him on the cell phone?

He just had a cell phone in his hand. That means he's he's ignoring us. I went to voice. Yes, you think he's gonna give me some millions when he wins? No? Did you tell him to answer the phone? Yes? I wrote, here's what I wrote, maybe this was confusing. I wrote answer phone. Do you think I should have written please answer phone? Scott, call him again, Call him again. He's sending me to voicemail. I could tell oh, he's like, it's two lay for a minute, talk on the phone. No,

that's what is That's one that's going on. You either that. He's on the phone with Elvis telling Elvis he can't believe what I'm saying. I'll do the math on the air. I don't care those tickets. I'm in on you. I agree with you, Brodie, and I'm going to tell him that right here. I'm I'm on your side, you know me. Slices are on my side. You have that slice to the audio told you to get Yeah, I got Scott. He's not answering whatever. It's not okay, I gotta He's

no fun. He knows I'm right. Now. You know he's busted. Now. He's busted because he knows I'm right. We have a couple of free dessert stories for you that I wanted to give you from the mail bag. Absolutely, yeah, but let's play this one piece of sound that we have here are actually two pieces of sound. All right, So what's the This is a phone number. The phone number one, the one. It's the message that was left for you. Do you want to know what? You want to know?

What language this is? What's going on here? Is that the one we played it last week? Now we played two calls last week, but then you sent something else. It's this listen warranty? Linchy? Is that Cantonese? What is that? It sounds like a dialect of Chinese. It sounds like definitely some Chinese in there. Why did we play it? Where did this come from? That was my answering machine? That was another way was at home? That was that was a recent one though that was after last week,

so we don't know. We wanted a translation. Is that what we're hoping for here? No? I'm like, I don't know. Is that like my social Security number is bad? But they are hoping that I was Asian? You're going to warranty? I don't know what it is? Come on, scare you? Do you do accents what I'm saying I have? First of all, I'd like to know what language that is. I'm guessing it's it's it's a form of Chinese, but but Chinese has several different dialects and several different reasons.

So if you if you know what that what she said and what what dialect that is or what region, please let us know. But we're curious. Um. All right, now, let's move on to UM, our friends, Barstool Sports, and our guy I'm trying desperately Dave Portner figure out, David, I'm trying to find the person who sent it to me. I ap aologize. UM. So Dave Portnoy is the guy who probably you probably know him from just One B the pizza review guy. He's like, all right, everyone knows

the rules. One bite and he takes ten bites and he gives pizza a rating. And he pulls up randomly to these places in the middle of the day when no one's expecting him anyway, so he he doesn't right, but hold on, he does his typical stick. He goes into the store, buys the pizza and now this is the part where he comes out with the pizza pie and he's about to eat it on camera and talk about a promotion that they happen to be running with a uh an app called Slice, which, by the way,

let me take it from there. But I was gonna say, hey, Slice, if you're listening, Uh, you should be a sponsor of our problem. It's a no brainer. Continue hold Okay. So Danielle Marie uh sent me uh DM deal d ms on on the Graham that's de Marie seven one seven. I'm assuming she's a Philly girl from the area code. Either that our birthdays July seventeenth, possibly okay, or it's July, in which case she's three and a half years okay.

So she sent me the video of the audio gonna play. So, uh, Dave from Dave from Barstool's Dave right, the creator call her daddy. Yeah, No, he's not the creator. He's the owner of owner of her daddy right. He bought it from them, sign them and right. Okay. So he's trying to talk about how this this Slice app. The Slice app allows you to buy and get delivered pizza from Pizza all over your area. I don't know if it's available everywhere. I know it's in some major cities like

New York and Boston. After that, it's a cool concept because you can get You're not to tweet me, but anyway, So he's trying to talk about a promotion and he's fumbling over the exact verbiage of what they promotion. It's a contest and you have hashtag this thing. And Danielle heard him say something that caught her attention. And play the clip you'll hear what she's what she is stool president day. We want to get free pizza for a year.

They're doing on social media Instagram, Twitter if you do the hashtag pizza for life, Slice for life, Slice for a year. So hemmerly said slice Slice Now listen, listen, Dave, my man we are I am a manning Dave because I can. And by the way, we were just called Spruce tonight. I left to call Spruce next week next Wednesday, told me he was available. He yeah, he was. I forgot. Is he still available? No, I'll get him on. By the way, I don't. I don't know how this happened,

but Anderson Windows and Doors keeps emailing me. Not it's so sending me promotions, and all the promotions say dea Spruce. Now, Spruce is not a common name. So somehow Dave think I'm him. I have no idea what happened, no idea how Kenderson Windows thinks I'm Spruce? Right? Could you teach me his number real quick. By the way. In the meantime, got continue, Are you gonna call him? So? I'm gonna okay, so I, I tweeted, I tweeted, I I replied to

the post. I commented on the post on his uh on Barstool's Instagram, I said, Hey, man, we're big fans our listeners. Slogan is slice for Life. We have pizza in our logo. Our fans are the slices. You said, slice for Life. Check out our podcast available on all platforms except Eiser. But he has not, to my knowledge, checked out our podcast because Stool praised the big Bucks

Stool president. Ay uh. You know, once you slide into his d m s there or everyone, tell him about us, tell him that we've been here, and tell him if he likes to call her, you know, ditty podcast. He will love. Call her Brodie exactly, call her Brodie. He heard it. That's the name. Give me that. Give me that message. In the meantime, let me tell you a story of hope from Trevor. He wrote to us, is it mail time? Say send you the mail time jingle?

I think it's mail time. I think I've been slacking on the jingles lately because we're at home and it's not as easy to you mail talk that change like it's mail time. Welcome, you've got mail. The buttons I press are for Barbie Doll fingers, big fat thumbs. I'm telling you, well, we're working remotely, so you know. Yes, this is a great equipment that can handle a lot of things. It's just the display screen is really small. Anyway, Trevor said, hey, uh, I just want to tell you

my free dessert story from Wayfair and Amazon. My wife and I ordered a buffet table. Long story short, It showed up damage. My wife said, what are you gonna do? I said, oh, don't you worry. I'm gonna get my free dessert. Called and they said there was nothing they can do. Supervisor ended up getting sixties six dollars back for the damages. Amazon didn't order my wife's package on time. I said, oh, hold on a second call. Amazon called Amazon and said it was my wife's birthday and the

package was super important. It wasn't. They said, we can do a five dollar gift card, you cheap bastards. I said, here's what you're gonna do for me. Double it to ten dollars and I'm happy the package costs fifteen dollars small dessert, but thanks. I'll be buying the book Slice Full Life. Hashtag fuck you, a hashtag scaries box. Nice to want to see that you got it all right. Also so um Lenny Lamb wrote to us about the Mandela effect, saying, Okay, I'm powering through some of the

later podcasts. I can't remember which episode, but you guys mentioned the Mandela effect. One example Brody used was the Berenstein barren Stain Bears and that it has always been the barren Stain Bears or Berenstein or whatever. I found. I found this old picture in my hard drive and wanted to share it with you. It's actually there. It is the book The Barrenstein Bears learn about whatever it is, So and the Ill learn about stranger whatever anyway, stranger danger.

The point is it was weird that a random reference from his past was mentioned on the day that he listened to the podcast, and then lo and behold, he's going through his collection he finds these old books. Um, yeah, alright, okay, well that's that's a coincidence. That's a coincident, is not a it's not not irony. Yeah, alright, alright, please read this on the podcast. It would be irony if on

the way home Barrenstein Bear killed him. Okay, anyway, y'all read an email on episode Oh, Noel Johansson wrote, y'all wrote it? What up? Guys? You all wrote? Read an email on episode one one from my buddy David. Oh wait, we do talked about this. This is to eat a dick guy. All right, We're good, all right, continue, We did this last week. I remember us talking about to eat a dick guy from the r v A And you said, what is the r v A mean? And

I said, okay, okay, okay, okay, Richmond, Virginia. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, alright, back to um. Have you heard so? I wanted to talk about enterprise around a car um, and I wanted to talk Should I talk about the bed Beth and Beyond thing again? We can do anything your little heart desires because we own this podcast and we'll do all of that. Yeah, you know when we're gonna do it. Party.

Didn't we already do two commercial breaks? We only did one? Man, you have Anesia, Well, I thought we did the one up front. No, that was this that was it. That was it? This this is that that you could do with this you do that's it? And now this man it I can't remember everything. It's later Wednesday night. This story was in the New York Post a day or two ago. I wanted to share it with everybody. I'm

not getting political. I always preface that. But you know, we had the uh, the unfortunate uh riots at the Capitol a couple of weeks ago, two weeks today, and you know, the FBI is trying to use video footage and camera angles and uh they have apparently right now at least and then apparently they have cell phone uh like uh, cell phone detectors. So if you were in the Capitol with your cell phone, they they'll know you there.

They can track you. And so and a lot of people posted videos of themselves bragging like, oh, look at me, I'm doing it. Look at me, I'm in the Capitol. Look at me. Is my name, my busy and this is my company. And they're all getting caught for being dumb. However, this guy wins. This guy wins. A Maryland man was arrested for being at the Capitol riot for being involved in the riot, right how did they catch him, Well, he was arrested for something else. He was out on

parole at the time. He went to the capitol and he was wearing his ankle monitor. Oh my god. So they g PSC's ankle monitor because he's on parole. So they track you, and they tracked him to the capitol. That's not a smart criminal, not a smart So it's a Maryland man. I I usually the right right. Uh, let me tell you about Enterprise, enterprise running car. It's a it's a little bit of a free disser story. Um, there's a lot to it. But uh, I don't know

where to to to argue first, so let me um. Uh. First, I called Enterprise because I told you my I had a couple of car accidents that I got my my Dodge Charger got hit. Now, my Dodge Charger is a very large car. It seats five. Right, it's a full size car in the sense of old school full size car. But Enterprise they consider anything with four doors, mostly like a Camra or an Ultima full size car. I can

fit those cars in the trunk of my car. Okay, So, uh, I said to the to the woman, when I when I when I from the other company, the other car company, the insurance of the guy who hit me, the guy with no license, that guy. I say to the woman, listen, when you approve my rental car, which you say could take up to four days, let me tell you what

what's gonna need to be done. I'm gonna need you to give me an upgraded full size car or a luxury car, because I don't want to drive a small car that you call a full that enterprise calls a full size car. So step one, I want an upgrade. You guys hit me no license. She's okay, no problem. I said. Second of all, you're gonna pay for my satellite radio. Because I pay for satellite radio and my car is in the shop, I can't use my car, and I wanted car with satellite radio, and I'm not

gonna pay for that. Oh, we don't do that. Now. I've talked about this on the show before, because I've rented cars before and I've made them pay for the satellite radio. She says to me, well, I'm gonna have to ask my supervisor. But I don't see that happen. So she calls me back four days later and says, are you've been approved to go get your car just but we can't pay for the satellite radio. I said, well, I need to speak to supervisor. I already called my supervisor.

She said that, UM, she can't. She she's not gonna do it. I said, you're gonna do it. I said, I warns you on Monday that when all this was said and done, you were gonna pay for my satellite radio. Right. You don't know me, but trust me, you're gonna pay for my satellite radio. It's seven dollars a day roughly, with taxes and everything that adds up. When when the cause in the shop for a week, I said, so, rather than going through the trouble, I warned you in advance.

I'm being nice. Started very nice woman. I said, I did give you a heads up. I know, Mr Brownie, but I spoke to my supervisor. She said no, as I I tried to avoid this, please give me her information. So she gives me information and I call our leave her a message. That was on Thursday Friday. I have to go rent the car. I haven't heard back yet, but I still gotta go. After get the car, drop my car from the shop, I call Enterprise and the do you get the voicemail system. I wish I had

the recording. We sanitize our cars from the inside out. Well, okay, what does it matter if you if you sanitize them from the outside in it? Why is that? Why is that a selling point? Why does it matter you're going from the side out. Oh, you know, due to COVID restrictions, we sanitize our cars on the inside out, from the ground up. I don't care what direction you do it. So I thought, that's kind of like who cares, right,

and they go and and you know, enterprise. The good thing about enterprise is wherever you are within reason, if you don't have a car, they'll come get you and bring you to the rental place right right, So that's like enterprise, we'll pick you up. Scary. I'm gonna tell you something right now. I am not getting a car with a stranger in a rental car. Are you really gonna because I'm not getting a call with my friends

right now. I'm not going to call some wait hold on, no. But even if you guys have no I don't know if he's in conference and he's in the car for the past something. Okay, I'm not doing it. So I don't know about you, but I'm not getting in. They're not picking me up. I'm happy to take that risk. I'm not you. So I call, I call. It's like a it's like eleven o'clock. I said, listen, I need a car around twelve thirty. The guy says, uh, I don't have any full sized cause right now. But you

know what, by twelve thirty, Uh, we might have different cause. Right. So I said, um, well, what do you have now? Right? I'll come now. He says, we don't have any cause right now. Call me back at twelve thirty. Um, right, he says, the cause will be different. Then I said, okay, but what cause do you have now? He says, well, you're not coming to twelve dirty, so what does it matter? So? I said, well, if you have a car now and

it's something I like, I'll come now. Yeah, you know, if you come now, we're gonna have different cars in twelve thirty. Go what what does that matter if I come now because you have a car? I like, what does it matter if you have Are you listening to me? He wasn't listening. He was so caught up in me saying I was Originally I was coming at twelve thirty. There was no way I could convince him. I'll come now at ten o'clock. I'll come right now. So he says,

we have to call back. So I couldn't. I couldn't deal with him, and he didn't have any cause when I called back at twelve thirty, So I call another place. Uh in a not a great area of New Jersey. Okay, I wouldn't have called death first. And I said, um, do you have a full size car? I drive a Dodge Charger. I need a big car. Do you have a CRISTI three hundred dog? What do you have? Says? Oh, I have a Dodge charger. I said, great, I'm dropping off my car now. I'll be there in like forty minutes.

Now I have a reservation number through the insurance company, and I'm in their system already. I already have an enterprise reservation, so I said. So I said, oh great, I'll be there in like forty minutes. Let me drop my car. You have an uncanny way of making things more difficult for yourself and getting yourself into these issues. And he understand it's a it's a so this was uh, it was a Monday. It was was a Monday morning. Nobody has any cars. Monday morning, everybody's renting cars for

the week. Nobody has any cars cass on the weekends. Right, It's so, I said, listen, I've called nine enterprise renting cars. You have the only car I want. You have a Dodge Charger. I have a Dodge Charger. Can you please hold the car for me? Yeah, I'm sorry. We can't do that because we have people in the store. And they didn't have to be a Dodge charger. Cann't have been something lesser or something different. I didn't want a small car they only had. They didn't have any of

the cars something big. They had nothing. They had nothing. I feel like charger is a specialty card that they rarely have a lot. Now. No, No, they have the V six version, Like it's not expensive. That's one of the cause they rent. It's a full sized car. It's a it's a Dodge they rented. It's they rent Chevy and Palace. They rent Dodge charges for fusions. There's certain cause each company makes for rental car, like fleet cars. The charger is one of those cars. So they have them,

they just don't always have them in stock. She wouldn't hold the car for me, scary, I said, but I'm coming, I'm deserving it. I'm in the system. Put me down. Someone who store might want it. Someone who store might want it. Okay. So I get to the play I get to the place and I'm online and I looked outside and in the in the parking lot they have a M A g mc Terrain, which is a middle sized suv, fully loaded, leather seats, really nice. So I'm like, you know what, I'm gonna ask for that car because

they don't have a car my size. It's probably a couple of hours more. I want that car. So I get up to the counter. The woman's mind the counter, I said, yeah, hi, I'm here, Mr Brody. Yeah, I spoke on the phone with you. Yeah, huh uh the charge up? Not that's gone okay. I said, well, I went in your parking lot. You didn't have anything like except I want. I would like I would like the terrain. Can you give me the terrain? They didn't have anything scary, they were booked up, so so um so I said,

So I said, well can I have the terrain? She as well, there's only two problems with that. What's that one, it's ten dollars more day than what you're you're reserved for. And to that guy just got it and I see him drive off in the car. I said, okay, I really wanted that, just well, he needed it. He's tall, So I said, okay, but are you saying I'm short? And what do you think? She said, scary? What would

you do in customer service? I said, customer service? You have to you'd have to clean up that mess real quick. You have to say something like no, right, she said to me, he's taller than you. He's taller than you. Yes, no, no, she said, well, yeah, you are short, I said, I said, I'm I said, you don't say it to a customer. That's not very nice, Like, I'm not short, I'm not tall. I'm five ten, I'm not five three. So then she looks at me, she says, well, you're not very tall,

but don't tell me. I'm sure. I'm a customer, like, I'm trying to be fun with it. I'm like, that's a very nice. And the guy behind the counter is giggling. He's a tall guy. He's kind of like chuckling, like covering his mouth. I can see's chuckling. She stands up scary to to take me to the parking lot to pick out a car, and she's six three. Well, you know what in comparison relative loreal, relatively you are you are. I'm like, okay, I'm sure, I'm sure. She's got me

my five inches. I couldn't get me in the hoop like she was towering over me. Okay. We go out to the parking lot and they've got um a Chevy and Palla. A Chevy and Pala is a nice car. It's got leather, it's got all the options, doesn't have a moon roof. What are you gonna do? It's got satellite radio, which at this point nobody's paying for I'd have to pay for it myself because I haven't heard back from the supervisor. So I said, you know what,

that's a really nice car. It's black. It's like my car. It's about as big as my car. I'll take it. Great. It just came in today. We cleaned it up. It just got back on the lot because it wasn't there when I walked around before looking for the cause they had. I said, oh great, it's meant to be. So we go inside. We do all the paperwork, we get it, I go to get in the car and I get hit with a tornado of cigarette smoke, like the most awful, like you know, like your coat had a garlic smell.

The car back in the day when you're allowed to smoke, or Miami you still can do that. Right in Miami. You can still smoke in clubs and bars. Right, So the car is reeking of cigarette smoke. Now at this point, my car's in the body shop. My friend dropped my friend, Jeff dropped me off at the at the rental place. I have no way to get anywhere without renting a car, so my option is to get a little two door,

a little shitty car, or this car. So I said, there's a sticker on the dashboard that says no smoking. So I tell the woman. I go back in and I said, wait, you did this on this podcast. You talked, Yes, you talked about the fact that it was a smoke, it was smoking, someone had smoked in the car, and that you deserve some money off. Because right, so I did. I So long story short, Uh they gave me, uh, well they did. They couldn't do anything cause I wasn't

paying for the car. There was nothing they could do, and they charged me for the satellite radio because apparently that's a different department that they have to charge for. So I put down to pay for the rental car for the satellite radio, and then on Thursday, I still haven't heard back about the seller radio. So I call up the woman who was helping me and I say, listen, it's been I'm returning the car tomorrow. I got like a forty five dollar bill for the satellite radio, she

I said. I left her voicemail. I said, you gotta help me here. I called your supervisor and never heard back. Please call me back. So now I'm like ready for a fight because I'm I'm a stink mobile and I'm paying for satellite radio, which I told him I wasn't gonna pay for. She calls me back, she says, Mr Brodie, which We'll let you know. I spoke to my supervisor. She was adamant that they were not going to pay

for your satellite radio. I said, I'm gonna call her back right now, and she says to me, you don't need to. I told her she was wrong. I said, you have every right to get satellite radio, and I'm taking it upon myself to approve it out of our discretionary fund. And we are paying for your satellite radio, and we are so sorry that we were short with you.

That's yeah. So if you're five ten but you're short, I guess it's relative with relative, But can you imagine being a customer service The guy that who drove away with the car that she called him tall? Was he six seven? Was you a basketball player? Well, he was ahead of me online by two people. I would say he was probably her height. Yeah, he was taller. But you can fit into an Impella even if you're six three. It's got a curved roof. It is a nice car.

I don't I don't think commercials. The point was. The point was don't take ship. And you know what I say to people, don't take ship. They should pay for your satellite radio. Make him pay for your satellite radio. That's all I've been trying to get spruce on all this this entire time. I have a new system here. This is kind of cool. It actually will take a phone line, allegedly, and it will turn the phone line

into a podcast broadcast quality line. I kind of want to try and come on, you do you have your cell phone nearby. I'nna try it with you so badly. Hold on, I'm gonna I'm gonna invite you. I'm gonna see you. I want to try it so badly. This is gonna make your day. What I'm gonna do? We do? I want to. I want to, dude. This is how we get do better things on our podcast. Hold on, so I'm gonna I'm gonna text you to your phone

right now. A link. Okay, Now, okay, you're gonna turn your mic off first set hold on a second night yet, tell me when you get this, brody. Okay, here we go. I'm going to turn off your microphone. You're expensive, well, you're somewhat expensive microphone. You're decent, Mike, And I'm going to pull you up on the phone on our phone pod here you know theater? Did you get that? But yeah, I got a link? Okay, Now I'm gonna turn your mica on a second all right now click the link?

Click the link. H What is it? That's me waiting? Yeah, okay, waiting. It's waiting for you. I'm waiting for you to come into the room with me on my phone. Can you hear me? What are you talking about? I hear you turning my microphone. I have to sign up for this. No you don't, do you really? Yes, says enter your name put in. You can't just click the link and go on. Oh my hold on email option will choose microphone, your your phone, your phone, your phone mic default. Ok,

here we go. All right, Hey you there, microphone? Hello? Yeah, how is that? Well? You sound like ship. I mean it sounds like a phone call. This thing promised something different. This thing promised like, well, are you on your WiFi? Your home WiFi? I don't stop playing my equipment. It's pretty bad. All right, I'm disappointed. Come back to my damn it. All right, I'm back on my that's terrible. I'm out of breath. My family's home. I didn't empty

the dish one thing. I wanted that on text message, and I had two other things I wanted to talk about. We'll do it next week. And so why why don't you get a laundry list? No, it's it's all right. Just I did my laundry list. I'm buying a washing machine. Oh my goodness, folks. Oh, by the way, next week, I'm doing a food run you know where I'm going you're it. No, it's like you don't know.