#114: Jerking Out Flicking Out and Dipping Out

Where where you're usually? You're not gonna go home. You're not gonna do nothing that you gotta work for the people? Do you do? You don't really have to go I mean, I was kind of excited earlier when Elvis is like, dude, scary, your birthday's Monday. Take it off. My birthdays next Monday. So your birthdays today, why don't you take off for your prost? Of all, who's gonna hang out at seven am in the morning? That's redundant. But who's at seven o'clock?

Who in the morning? Who's gonna what am I gonna do eight o'clock in the morning? Call my buds up, Hey, you want to hang out before you go to work? First of all, I don't have anyth that's my birthday I'm everybody. My kids are in school, my wife's at work. Where am I going? Let me do sleep late to work. I got a cake out of the deal under the twelve hours to go here you I mean, yeah, I have seven more hours for it worked for the Comedy

Department parody. We could have did wrote Super Bowl songs yesterday. We could have done the podcast, and then you could have dipped. You didn't want to do that. Well, we haven't done the podcast yet, so after this podcast is over, well, if I did, you put your hand up on your hip. By the way, I feel like dip you're going into something. I feel that's the wrong choice of words for leaving. But that's what people say. I don't think that makes sense, though,

I'm sorry, I gotta dip. No, that's like when you're like you when people say you luck out, but you're getting luck. No, you dip, you dip, You dip out of a place now, but you don't dip out of tips. You dip into the salur cream which I hate sing but I dip into the the uh, the salsa you dip into you know, dip out of sauce. You dip into sauce, right, But in this. But but when people say they're leaving a party, people say, people say ship. They make up phrases. That doesn't mean anything. It doesn't

make it right. The problem with when someone says that they knocked out last night, they knocked out. Well, knocked out means you fell asleep. Yeah, you fell asleep. You you knocked out, you passed out somebody but you But you know. But your analogy to what I just said. If you know how the analogy game works, is you have to say something that knocked in. He was like, Oh, I was so tired. I was. I passed in. But you slept in. If I slept in, you slept out. Nope,

you slept in. You slept in your bed. Sorry, I sorry, I slept in, meaning when you missed something. Yeah, I slept in. I slept in the house. I missed my alarm clock. Right, but you slept in. But dipping is in. You dip into things you can't dip out. Why not? That doesn't make any sense. You don't dive out of a pool. Hey, listen, I didn't create the terminology. People say it. I don't care what they say it. I have to go along with it. You make up all

the words you want, they don't make. I still didn't make I'm still fighting against lucked out. Oh, man, you lucked out, you lucked out. That means you're out of luck. That's the opposite of what it means. Doesn't make any sense. You should looked in, man, you looked in, you locked in. You got a lot of luck. You you lucked in like the luck is in you. You got luck, and

you're full of luck. You don't say you're empty of luck, out of luck, lucked out, out of luck, and lucked out of the complete opposites of each, and they shouldn't be. I locked out, I'm out, I'm out out of luck. You look into things way too much. If you check out, you're out right checking out right. You go into a hotel, you check in, true checking you check out right. So if you you luck in, you shouldn't be luck out. Doesn't make sense. You can dip out of a party

the same way you're checking out of a hotel. You I'm checked out, man, I'm keeping out. You're you flicked out. You could flick out like I'm flicking myself out. So let's create something new and just did I just did? You just heard me create something with flicking. Flicking. You're flicking out, yeah, because like you know, when you flick something, it's like flim out. I'm done. You flick a bugger, you flick a little chip on the table. I'm flicking out.

That makes more sense, Yo, let's flick that. We should start that. I think we just did. We just flick. But I like to be like, we should come up with something that's a great idea, scary, just to cover something else. I told you, did I talk about that that I would try In the in the nineties, I

tried to create a phrase. Didn't work. Phrase was like when like a girl's like on your ship, like John your k so they're bothering you, like people on your on your case like I was like, So my phrase was get off the jeans, like get away from my pants. Don't look at my just get off the jeans. Get off you, get off the jeans. Like in other words, you're too close, you're on me, you're on my strap, you're on my you're trying to get on my on

my sounds like you're mash debating under your clothes. Get off your genes, get off onto my jeans, getting off onto the genes. See now, would you say get on, like, oh, I'm gonna get on, get it on right? Get it on right? Is having sex? Right? Let's get it on? No jerking off? You're getting on? Are you jerking on? You're jerking on and off? But what's the off part? You're jerking on something two motions. It's on, off, on, off. No,

you're jerking. Your hand is on down. After you're jerking, your hand is on right, and then whatever happens at the end of that lands on something. Where's the off? There's no off? Doesn't make any sense to you either. No, I mean, listen, it makes a lot of sense to me. Get me wrong. I don't think about it. While I'm thinking about it, I'm just saying the term jerk off. It's like it's all jerked out. See jerk out would work? Jerk out was a song from the eighties. It was

a bad fucking R and B song. Okay, but wouldn't you make no sense? Think about it? Jerk out? What'd you do? I jerked out? Jerked? Yeah, you jerked something. Something came out. You jerked out. Don't worry. I'm not looking for help from the outside because you're jerked empty, right, you don't jerk or you're not off anything. There's no there's no often jerk off. No, unless you're hit in the light switch with it. What's the off part? There's no off? Wow? Have you ever dip to go jerk off?

You have a dip out the jerk off? I feel like it sounds like I would flick I would flick out to jerk out. We do that parties. This party is this party is uh parties for ship We should flick out? Okay, the what are the phrases are there that I hate? Ginormous? Hate it? You've wasted my time with ginormous because you took two words that meant ginormous, combined them together and created nothing new. Okay, No, you did because ginormous means it's bigger than both those words combined,

so it's the largest. It's not bigger than both gigantic and enormous. So that would be like a like two times that that's ginormous both words. So if somebody's fat and chubby and I call him fubby, does that make them fatter? If they're at Do you have a problem with zero fox given? No? Because I don't give a fuck zero, Right, I don't get I don't give a fuck. Now, if you said I couldn't give a fuck, fine, But he said I could give a fuck, that's wrong. Then

you could give a funk. If I don't, I don't give a fuck. Right. But if you say I could give a funk, that's the same as I could care less. If you If you said I could give a fuck, then okay, that means you you care enough to give a fuck. Okay, right? What about what about spilling the tea? Spilling the spill the tea. That's like, you know you have some I understand. The team means that some news or some gossip. I understand with some gossip. So you're

spilling it right me? Hear it? Right? But if you were drinking the tea right, right, if you're spilling it, if I'm listening, I'm drinking it right. But if I but but if it was reversed, if you're like, dude, you got gossip, I'm gonna drink the tea. It doesn't make any sense. You want to spill it so the other person can see it. You want to spit it out, You want to vomit that tea out. Vomit the gossip. Vomit the gossip would be a good website. Vomit the gossip, right,

my favorite muppet. By the way, remember vomit the gossip. You shook right now, I'm woke. You woke or you swoll I'm never swollen except when I'm jerking out, by the way. Okay, so so on this This is what happens plant another We didn't planet ship. No. People say when they're having a great day or they're like al that they arrive in a in a new country and it's a beautiful sunny day, or they're on the beach, they say, what a time to be alive? Well, well,

shouldn't that be every time? I mean, it's not just today that it's a great time to be alive. I mean I would hope that a time to be alive would be any time you're breathing. Well, I would rather be alive than dead. But I think the point is, like, if I had to live any time in any decade, like this is a bit of time, Like you don't want to live during the time of the plague right now. I don't think anyone during the plague was going what a time right now? In China. Do you think that

people with the masks? And by the way, is a picture in Today's Daily News in New York is in New York, and I'm sure if you google it you'll see it. You know, the water bottle jugs. They're cutting the bottles off the bottoms, I think, And they're wearing water jugs on their head with the open spout at the top like an antenna to cover their faces and they can breathe out the top. I think. I don't know.

I didn't read the article. Don't tweat me. The point is, do you think those people with the bottles the water jugs on their head are going? By the way, that was me and a water bottle, not me making fun of an Asian accent. You snowflake bastards. By the way, can we talk about me Safonia for a second? Problem with that? I got the jingle allright. By the way, these are they loaded our studio with uts pretzels out

of Philadelphia. By the way, that Philadelphia area Uts is a sponsor the Opstair Morning Show, not a sponsor in the Broken Boys podcast. So we used to play a game called Who's chewing those chips? Right? And whenever we had chips, we would run out too that. We would run down to the vending machine and play who's chewing those chips? Right? And someone would go and you'd have to guess which person on the show those chips? Right? Well, who's eat nuts? Who slurp nuts? Beginning by the seven

going bat ship? Right now bat Ship. So the point was Uts came in and there's a rack here, but no joke. We'll put pictures up tomorrow on Friday one. It's like fifty flavors of US chips. We're not getting paid for this. I'm just telling the story, I promise. And so it looks like a grocery store set right. I mean you look at you walking into a grocery store. I mean it's filled with cheeseballs and kettle. I had no idea had this many flavors. They got a lot again,

not a commercial chips. The point was, I said, I have an idea, why don't we play who's chewing those chips? Tomorrow? And I was told, now, too many people have me Safonia, and we'll get offended and hurt and they won't listen. Yeah, Safia is, by the way, is when you well let's put this way, and just were grossed out of what Brody just did, like like the oldest to the proble where you couldn't listen to it, then you have me. It's it's a real condition. Now phony is in the name,

but it's a real thing, and I get it. I have sympathy for anyone that has anything wrong with them, but I feel like the world needs to go on occasionally. Yeah right, Like I know this peanut allergies, but I still want to eat peanut butter occasionally. Now, if you can't have airborne peanuts, I will not eat them around you. I totally get that, But Messafoni, I don't want you to turn the radio off. All right. So, but we

have ten million people listening a ten million people. How many people, I don't know, but you know what, the fact that there's even one means that there's some snow Flix out there that will be offended. So we can't, but they'll be offended for the mesasa um from the Latin They're crazy to the max. My favorite cartoon back in the nineties, Wariens. Yeah, what if this someone who has who can't tolerate uh nationality names being mangled? Right?

Now they're going a not nationality, but any kind of word like wordplay that people could snowflake us on us at any point at any time. We just gotta be very careful. You gotta be very careful about what we're saying. You can't very careful. Do not offend the snow flakes, Brodie, Come on, you know better. Now. I think that's your birthday. You should be able to do this on your birthday, at least, at the very least on your birthday. You should be able to at least say what's on your

mind without anybody complaining. Can I recap speaking in fact, it's my birthday. Just every time I think about the word birthday, I think of I think it would happened to me in the first grade. So this is not gonna be about you. Well, you can go to you. I mean, it's my birthday, but birthday's Monday. I was just wondering, birthday's Monday. I wonder if you had any any embarrassing birthday moments or things that happened on your birthday that we just I guess not as bad as

a story you're dying to tell, So go ahead. I'm not trying to tell anything I said, I'm gonna I wanted to recap slightly the rant and conversation we had on January thirty, Today's Elba Strand fifteen minute morning show. We talked about how I couldn't get reservations from my and my wife's birthday. We have our birthday's, Melissa. My wife's birthday is the same as yours, and so my birthdays today and so the day that's equidistant roughly Saturday, right,

it's two days going back, right, right. So I wanted dinner reservations at a restaurant three weeks ago, and they're like, we have nothing we can do. We can do like four thirty pm roughly or nine o'clock o'clock. So I hit them up on social media. No response. A lot of our slices love you guys, they all tweeted at this restaurant. No response. I'm gonna call them right now. I d M them, no response. I'm gonna call them. You're not gonna call him. You have the number ready,

I'm gonna call him right now. On pot. I don't think we should call them right now. I was gonna be my birthday present to you, making you a reservation for a steak paid for. Yeah, we don't get credit for that. No, I mean, I'm gonna make you steak dinner reservation. So we got a couple of text messages today on the on the Big Show, and they said, well, if Scary takes you out of steak dinner for your birthday, does that count as your steak dinner? And I said, no,

that would be my birthday steak dinner. It doesn't matter. They know. Everybody knows they listen to the morning show. I just they're not going to be there at twelve o'clock. You don't think so, not on Thursday. I think we should find out what Right now, people listening on a on a Saturday night, they're listening to this podcast at eight o'clock. They're like, why why can't you call now it's Saturday at o'clock because that's not when we recorded. Okay,

we want to put them on. Yeah, I feel awkward about it. Why not? You're not gonna pull the Elvis Rand card, are you. I'm gonna do what I need to do to get you and your reservation in there. Might if not, we already have dinner plans at an equally wonderful restling those are cancellable. I don't need to cancel. I'm gonna beg to get into a good thing and give me dirty looks. See this is what you would say,

they'll spit my food. And thank you for calling Rails, New Jersey's premier steak Please press one rail for our dress. Press three. This sounds like a sex pressure. Did you remain on the line because I can't response. You can't press buttons. You press everybody's button. God, thank you for calling Rails Steakhouse, steakhouse. And how my sister Allison, how are you? Um? This is pretty good. Thanks, I'm doing well today. To um, this is scary Jones. I'm with

the Elvis Duran Morning Show in New York City. How are you doing? Okay, I'm doing okay. I promise this is not a phone tap. I swear to God, but I want I swear. I wanted to do a favor for a friend. Uh who's on the show, you know, David Brody on our morning shop. I think I've heard of his name. Okay, you know, you know he's been trying to get he's been trying to get a reservation for four people to the steakhouse for Saturday, and uh, because it's it's his birthday and his wife's birthday. They

having a double birthday. And he he called you guys about maybe three four weeks ago and all of it, and they found out then that there was no reservations really available, uh during a prime time for Saturday night. But I figured I would give it one last ditch effort to see if maybe something might have come available. I know you guys have cancelations. People change their mind, that happens. Yeah, is there a way that we can get him in there. He's not looking for a free

ride or anything like that. He was just looking for a reservation for four at a prime time. And when is the ad? It's this Saturday night. By the way, you guys, I know you're pretty popular place. But why I'm kind of curious why, uh why is it so full this specific Saturday or is that just every Saturday? Basically every Saturday, every Friday? Right? You guys have you have the secret sauce right there? I don't know, it's

just speak easy and just the atmosphere, yeh um rafters right? Okay, So yeah, so he's been tweeting at you guys, do you guys check your social media. Um, yes, they do check their social media. Yes, who's the social media person? Um? I believe it's Pat who check us to social media? Pat? All right, well Pat, Pat's been ignoring every every everybody.

I got listeners. We've talked about this at nausea um our listeners have been trying to get through to you guys, and and and tweeting at at you guys on social media everything like crazy and it was, and nobody's respond nobody's in responding. He's even DMed you guys to say, hey, please help me out. Oh really okay, right, so what do you so? What what do you? What do you think? Um? Just when me? Please? You on hold? Okay, okay, thank you?

Right now, I want to talk like I'm like I'm if she recognized the different voice right in to Waco, New Jersey. I just got your reservation social welcome. You're welcome, and that's your stick. No it's not does not count. No, it's all the problem having with my Alexa. Good afternoon, rail stickhouse. Mike speak him out. Hey, Mike, I was on hold, young lady. You was helping me, uh put me on hold? Did she pass along my call to you. You know what, it automatically rings down to the office here.

I'm sorry, Oh that's okay, Well, maybe I can help you. My name is David. Uh. I was been trying for a number of weeks to get a reservation for this Saturday. Uh. And the only times that were like it was like four or forty five and like ten o'clock at night, and I was just seeing if anything was available. I've I've tweeted you guys a bunch of times. I haven't heard back. I d M your account, I didn't nobody got back. I don't know if anybody runs you social media.

But yeah, actually actually for this this past week, actually the persons in Mexico on vacation. But because I had like thirty people tweet at you and uh Saturdays. Uh yeah. The best way to get ahold of this is obviously through our through our website or just call. Yeah. No, I did call it, but I figured, you know, try social also, you know. Yeah, I know, we haven't. I know, Saturday has been been really busy. How many people it's four? See here here's the thing. What's your name, sir. I'm

sorry to bother you. Mike, Hey, Mike. Sorry, it's my birthday today. A. And it's my wife's birthday Monday, thank you very much. And my wife her birthday's Monday. We're so Saturday is right in the middle, and Rails is her favorite restaurant, and so she said pick a place, and I said, let's go to Rails, because she goes there all the time and I have not been there yet. And every time she goes with a friend, she's like, oh,

we gotta go, we gotta go. So it was my job to call three weeks ago and get a reservation, and I have been unable to do that. Can I figure it as we get closer, I give it a shot, all right, we'll getting closer hard. Three weeks ago A three weeks ago. Yeah, they told me you've locked up late and early. Let me just I'm just opening up the reservation system now. Thanks. So only only are so you only have the one guy checking the socials. That's too bad. Um, Let me spend some time work seeing

if I can't move stuff around. Let me see what I can do. I'll give you a call back. That would be great. Mike, appreciate it, all right, take care? All right? Okay, by the way, I got news for you. She transferred the call or the call bounced to him without the Elvis Duran show and Scary Jones magic touch. That's what happened there. Well not, Well, the problem is you got this guy on the phone, but I'm not gonna tell him she's from. Maybe you still go to him,

Maybe she'll tell him now. Yeah, well I guess the two are gonna now talk. But she he clearly don't know. He clearly didn't know. She was like, I've heard the name, so she was smiling. I heard it in her voice. But here's the thing. If they get me a table not knowing where I work, and I don't we're working here, I shouldn't get a table for that. I know it's a bill because it's your birthday. Yes, absolutely, that's why it's a double birthday, right that being said, And by

the way, you're gonna pay full price. Of course, it's not like you're hanging with me. Yeah. If I get it and they make room for me, that means there was room. Not really, unless they put us up against the next table so close that you don't that you want to die. You didn't allow me to make the connection. I can't allow you because that got no, because you want to scary that guy. Okay, can we can we tell the Brooklyn Boys audience what you did? I said

on the fifty minute morning show. Uh, Scary called up a restaurant years so it's right. That changes everything because it was years ago. Scary called up a restaurant to make reservations for Elvis Duran plus one. Right, he gets to the restaurant. It was never for Elvis durand was for Scary and his girlfriend. He gets here and he says checking in for Albus durand h plus one. They go, oh, uh, you don't Alvis Durrand. No, I was his plus one, but Elvis is sick tonight, so I brought a plus one.

But I was on the reservation all time. I was the plus one. They were like, oh yeah, all right, okay, well here's the problem with that. My girlfriend and I were celebrating an anniversary and I will go to any length to get the table in the hot restaurant because that's the restaurant that we wanted to go to. Restaurant restaurant. Yeah yeah, but you lied and said you amas trying. See what you did here was I had to get I had to use the power of the show this time.

Just now, well I use my own name this right, But you said you're from this show. Dropped the name. But what you from somewhere right right? But what you did last time was you claim to be the man himself. Well that was years ago. You bat you bait and switch them, is what you did. I needed to get that res that was for It was for an an anniversary. It was a special occasion. I will go through any

length speaking of reservations. But hold on, I'm I want to just say that one other thing that you know,

you know and I do. He uses everybody uses something to get ahead, but nobody calls us like, hey, I'm Mike from Do you know how many people will call a restaurant that it's impossible to get into, and they will they will use someone to call it, and then they'll they'll they'll add on, oh, and I'm a doctor, oh and on a lawyer or because if you add these suffixes to your name or whatever or some kind of a prefix, the suffix and the doctor no doctors, no no. At the end, you have a like you

want to don to tag your your PhD something PhD at the end, nobody PhD fix suffix. You will give that stuff because it will resonate and no and you it will get you the table over the quote. Person that doesn't have the edge, I'm just gonna say, the common person. And unfortunately every here's the thing to think about. Everyone has an edge if they think about it, and they can use that edge to get ahead. And that's my advice to everybody listening to this podcast. I'm saying

that it just happens to be. I'm on a radio show. I'm just saying that we're possible. I'm just saying, you love. What if that restaurant that you lied two years ago, what if someone was like, you know what? Uh, I was gonna call it sick. I don't really feel well, but I heard Elvis Durrand's coming for dinner tonight. I'm gonna come in even though I don't feel well. I'm gonna come and work. And then Elvis doesn't come in,

well they shouldn't. That that's they have ill intentions. Intentions Alvis. Now, listen, my money is just as good as anyone else's dollar. But dollar, your Instagram photo is not as valuable as Elvis's. It doesn't matter. My my money is just as good as his. Hey, what are you pitching about? I just almost got you. I think I got you that reservation you almost did. That girl was like Elvis Durant, Why he didn't know squat about Deadley is what she didn't.

She thought she was being phone taps. She was kicking you know what she did? She got She took the phone. She's like, I'll be right back, and she flicked out of that conversation. She flicked out. She flicked it, She flicked it right out. She flicked out. What are you hitting? Buttons? Buttons? Commercial break? Oh, so we'll be right back after this. Yeah, okay, I want to say give a shout out to Vinny from City Bank, who's day of this week. I was, I don't know, three minutes late, so the show had

just started. So i have my Heart Radio on my phone and I'm listening to the beginning of the show. So technically I'm like four minutes late because with the late on my heart and I'm walking down the street listening with the I Heart Radio app, no no headphones, just in my in my pocket loud as. I'm walking down the cold street and this guy walks by and he goes, hey, brother, it's done like that. Hey, it's gone, man. He says, uh, it's me Vinny. And I looked at me,

go Vinny. And then he told me who he was on on social media and I said, oh, Vinny, I know him from social media. So he says, I'm listening right now. I said, then you must know I'm late. The show already started. I got I gotta run. He was going to the opposite direction I was. So he says, nah, listening to Brooklyn Boys to the show the air right. I said, put the show is on. He goes, I get it later. I'm listening to the episodehere you guys in bb REXA. I go, that's all you're up to.

He goes, no, I'm looping. He's looping. So that's looping around. He hoped it so today, Uh hold on, hold on, hold on a second. This is Patty pat day, young up. Patty was calling and wish me happy birthday. You know Patty from the record label. Gotta be nice to the record label. Guys. Patty's the best bet. He never forgets my birthday. He calls everybody. He calls everybody. Call you again. Yeah, yeah, he's gonna come again. Okay. So today I'm running fifteen

minutes early. So I'm walking down the same street. There's no way you can run into the same guy. Vinny walks by me again at so okay, he goes, I go, you got the show on? Hees because we weren't on yet. He goes, No, I'm I got the Brooklyn Boys on. That's my walk. So he walks. It works at City Bank, a couple of blocks from here, west or whatever. So if you've got a seven minute walk, but here's my thing. Yesterday I'm four or five minutes late. Today I'm fifteen

minutes early. Is he waiting on the corner and then as I come he starts to walk. Is he just waiting for me? No, there's no way. There's no way. Like I may show up tomorrow an hour late and see if he's there. It was a cool sidens really the exact same time, two days in a row. Definitely. I feel like he's like, Wow, I know how Brody gets down Pad. I don't know. I like Vinnie, but I feel like if I bump in him tomorrow at a random time, something's up, you should come in an

hour early. Tomorrow. I just said hour late. It's the same thing. But yeah, see if my point is I'm not Yeah, I just experiment when I come and see if he's there waiting, comes waiting on the corner an hour early. Okay I just said. I just said an hour later, because then I get to be late and it always yells at me. I can go. I was. If you really want to research, and you really want to experiment, you think he's getting there. Four come in

all arbitrary times. You come in an hour early one day, and come in minutes the next day, next day, fifteen minutes right, exactly right? How many days in a row? Leave them, put your headphones down, Go walk to corner right now. If he's there. If he is there, I guess what. Well, he's not gonna be waiting for me to walk in that direction because I'm already here. He's he'll be. So the question is how many days qualifies for stalk? It's three days. Stalk is three days unbelievable.

I think three days is an unbelievable quincide, four days of stalk, four days of stalk at four different times. What if I take what if I walk a different way to work and he still bumps into me. What if he comes up I never have known. What if he comes up from behind me? What if he's by the garage? If he pops out of a man hole, that's what I'm What if he's in the backseat of my car and then he dips that's a stalk. Then I'll flick him out and flick him out like him out.

I think, flick out hash take flick out, dude, I that was that a terrible party last night? Had to flick out a jerk out? Jut? I wouldn't he would do that before you leave? Right? You do it after? That would be crazy. Imagine somebody just starts jerking out in the middle of the party. Imagine that's the only way to leave. Imagine that's the entertainment, right, you can't leave you haven't jerked out, all right? Think about it? Okay, isn't a blowjob to suck job? Like people? Okay, people

tap out? Right? But that's what you say. Blow job is really a such job? Yeah, I have a blowjob story. Remind me, let's go there right now. But people do tap out, and the same thing is dipping out. Yeah, but tap out is a wrestling term, you tap your partner so you can get out the other person's tapping in. You don't tap out to go in the ring. You tap out to leave the ring. Dude, I'm dropping wrestling knowledge on you. This podcast has everything we really do.

By the way, that's gonna be a Brooklyn Boys. Uh quote from the Brooklyn Boys quote? Guy on Twitter? Did you see have you've been following it? He's hilarious. Well you know what, No, wait a minute. If a guy puts up quotes from our show, aren't we hilarious? No, he's hilarious because he found it and capsualized it, transcribed it and capsualized and capsulate encapsulated it. Yeah, it's not capsulized encapsulated it. And yeah he gets the credit. There was a couple here on my phone here where uh

was a quote favorite episode? Yeah? So Uh. Brodie tells his thoughts on Thanksgiving raps having Mayo episode seventy nine at the Sevree Mark Uh says, quote to me, at, David Brodie, you tell me where in the history books did the Pilgrims come to Americo? Mayonnaise? How dare you put mayonnaise in a Thanksgiving rap bullshit, so stuff like that. Uh, if you follow it daily Brooklyn Boys quotes on Twitter. Yeah, yeah, okay.

Do you want to hear the blow jobs? Stay? I want to hear it yet, please because in the meantime there's a very funny comedian. Or do you have to call her a comic because actresses are now actors. You could call her comic or comic stand up comics. She's either way, it works. She's stand up comic. Quest she's a she. Uh, you know what, I don't know she identifies the woman she says, I just want to be careful. She may have another I believe. I believe she is

a woman who identifies as a woman. All that she's a comedian or an actor. I can't whatever it is. Anyway, she does a one woman show, or if she identifies as a woman, one woman show. Uh, it's produced by Natasha Leone. Everybody loves Natasha Leone. The show is called

Get on Your Knees Now. I saw her as a guest on seth Meyers on Colbert on Fallon promoting this show to one woman show eighty minutes long and the show it's an off Broadway show and the whole show is about herror life as a young woman as a virgin, and her experiences with giving her first blow job, being afraid to give her first one, and then how she progressed in life and got better at it to pride in it scared guys off, but it's it's very well crafted,

it's very funny. It's a great show. So I mentioned my friend Jeff a bunch of times on the podcast. I say, Jeff, Friday night, why don't we just go to this show. I don't know. I don't know anyth about it. I don't I don't know. I said, I heard good things. She's very funny. Let's go to the show. Okay, alright, fine, we'll go. We had dinner. We went to a place called Emmetts. It's been Emmetts, I have not I've heard

about it. So Emmetts is a place in New York City Manhattan here that serves deep Dish pizza Chicago style deep dish pizza. Okay, so we're like, hey, I really like deep dish pizza. You know, you really can't get deep Dish other than going to Juno's in New York. There's not a lot of places to serve it. So we went there. It's not far from where we're going to see the show. They put us to the table next to so it's a converted store like it looks like it used to be an apartment but now it's

like a store front off the street. Open the door and there's the tables right off the sidewalk. So the front is all glass windows and doors, all glass Florida ceiling. We sit next to a table table by the window, which is like right off the sidewalk, and there's cork. So it was like it was what do you call us? Like? Um, the windows that open on hinges like double windows, they're

like shutters, but their windows they're shutting. They're closed, and they have cork closing the gap between them bottom sides. In the middle the cold has worn that away, so the cold air is just shooting through the glass, shooting right through it. So there's tables next to us. There's a fore top and a two top, but the two top is next to really loud, obnoxious people. So I

say the guy, can we take the fore top? I don't want to take away your fore top because the two top was sitting at his a round table like Sidel's fox sidel's full, so we can't move. So we're sitting there. We tell him. He goes, oh, man, look at that the corks coming off. Oh my god, I feel terrible. People get up. We moved tables with that. Another couple that looks like their work friends. They go and sit at the table we were at. They take

the coats off and we're laughing. Now we're like, they're gonna sit at the cold table, frozen off their asses, right, nothing. They don't complain, they don't say a word. Now we look like the assholes because we were cold, Like maybe we're not maybe weren't cold. Maybe we'll maybe we're just like catchy, Like, how did I not cold? I don't know. The wind is whistling through the door, like it's coming through the window. Everyone has a different threshold. I guess.

All right, So the pizza comes. It's delicious, all right, But if you've ever had deep dish, bless you the deep dish. How would you describe deep dish pizza? Not a definition of what it is. Describe it in terms of the height of the cross the middle pot. Maybe you got an inch of two inches, an inch and a half of of of crust, and the middle it's a pillowy it's a pillowy, fluffy thing going on in there. And then on the middle part is you know, you've got some cheese and you've got some sauce on the

top of that, and with what maybe more? Have you never had deep dish pizza. It's toppings you okay, pan, it's in a square black around comes around und all right, right, deep but deep Chicago. Yeah, So deep dish pizza like a two inch rust and maybe and here's the thing. The inside passed. The crust is about an inch and a half inch and three quarters it's almost as high as the deep crust correct, and it's loaded like a lasagna, bread, cheese, meat, sauce,

really thick. The pizza emmetts delicious. The crust is really high. It looks great. The middle about as thick as a regular slice of pizza. It was like deep crust pizza. But the pizza wasn't like I don't know if it was ever up. I don't know if it was like the weight of the sauce and it sunk. It was a meat lover's but it was a sin. The crust was went high. But when then you could look into it. It was like a crater. It was like a crater.

That's terrible. It's like a bowl of soup. That's and so we were looking at it all the tables, going was as was that was that what we're looking and now? So then so then Mike Jeff says to me, you can't complain. We already complained about the call. Old. Yeah, you already got your your red flag. I got my red flag. I got to it on the table, already moved tables, so I couldn't say anything because it was also delicious, but three dollars bottle of soda, no refills?

All right, but where's the where's the bad part? No, the bad part is it wasn't deep dish pizza. Okay, you're no. They do one thing there. They sell deep dish pizza, so they're not a deep dish pizza deep. But it wasn't filled. It was like a pot. It was a deep crater pizza. That's what I'm saying. Okay, So and and then the wind okay, so what what did you have to do with someone giving a blowjob? I'm getting there. The dinner was great. We walked to

the theater. You take very long these days, maybe I should You should pop a see Alice, you want to do it? Viagara, don't be a jerk on? Okay? All right, God called back, don't be a hashtag, don't be a jerk on. Okay. So we go to the show, and you know, I don't really care. I didn't look into the show. I didn't read reviews. But of the audience is twenty thirty something young women. Okay, good place to go to pick up a girl who's into blowjobs. This show, okay.

The rest of the crowd looked like very flamboyant gay men, couples, gays, and then us. How do you know that these weren't lesbian? The women, I don't know. I'm just telling. I didn't say they were straight, but they were at a blowjob show. Uh. You know, By the way, do you want to review the show? Yes, I'm gonna review the show. We're walking down the street in the village reminded me of a joke one of my favorite comics from years ago, Greg

ro Gall great very funny comic. He was talking about how his friend is so stupid and he's like, he says the dumbest things. He's walking down the street with him in the in the Greenwich village of Manhattan, and he turns to Greg ro gall And and turning to the story, and he says, you know, when you see

two guys walking together in the village, they're gay. And then he says to his friend, we're we're walking down the street, like doesn't make any sense, right, So I can't assume that every two guys in the theater was gay because I was with my buddy and we're not correct, But it looked like from the hand holding that we were in a maybe we were the only ones in that whole theater that are not not in the business or have the experience of giving blow jobs. So we

we see the show. I'm laughing the whole show, but because I talked him into going. Throughout the show, I'm looking over at him, going is he smiling? Isn't a good time and he hasn't look on his face like it's amusing. Yeah. I hear him chuckle once or twice, and I assume he's chuckling a lot, but I only heard it once or twice. I laughed out loud a couple of times. He didn't like it nearly as much, but we walk out, and I like, how good was that? I hated it? What I hated it? Yeah, I don't.

I just I don't. So now you're gonna you're gonna pay for his ticket. So hold on, no, why not? He didn't have you invited him into this experience. Maybe you could up now I'm not doing that. I'm not sure. Maybe I don't like female comics. I don't know. I don't know. The whole thing was drawing out. It should have been shorter, it could have been funnier in forty minutes. It was eighty minutes twenty. So I was like, all right, man, listen, I'm sorry to like it. I really enjoyed it. I

thought this part was great. That part was great. I thought a delivery was fantastic. She's she's very pretty. It was just an amusing show to watch. It was just good. Okay. So he drives home and in the car right, He's like, yeah, man, the pizza was good at a good time. Tonight was fun night out, you know, away from the family. Whatever. I gotta tell you, I really didn't enjoy the show. I'm like, no, I get it. I yep, got it. You didn't like the show. Fine, Okay, at this point,

that's enough. Right, you'd get it. I would get it. I'm like, all right, great, I struck out on this right, I was wrong. And I said to him, I feel bad I brought you out. He but he kept he kept keeping on. The next day he sends me, he sends me links to three articles that reviewed the show it didn't like the show, that said it was too long, too many the same jokes. You know what it sounds like to me, Brodie sounds like he's trying to get some free dessert at it. Yes, that's what I'm saying.

So I texted and I go, dude, don't do this again, or we're not going anywhere ever, like and I got it, Like, yeah, I gotta stop. He needed to make you feel like a piece of ship. So I said, are you trying to make me feel like a piece of ship? Basically said he's like no, I just wanted you to know that other people think to what I do. I said, Well, he's watching it feel justified in his thoughts. He thought maybe he was what you said. The whole audience was

going crazy right now. People liked it. I think if you're a young woman who can relate firsthand of the experience of the first time and then the second time and the all think it might hit home with you more, right. But she had some very funny like jokes about like

what do you do with the balls? I don't I asked a woman who who said she was the queen of it, and she knew what She's just talking me, like lift them up a little bit, like it was funny, like her explaining like not knowing what to do and and what her thought process was during the first It's all very funny. He didn't find it funny, but three reviews like, oh, this one gave it a seventy nine, and uh, he would have thought would be fun. He thought he thought it sucked. He's like that. That's the

exact point of the show blue right. I will say, like the restaurant where Pat who does social media for rails went to Mexico. My impression is that Jacqueline Novak went to Mexico because I tweeted at her, I love the show, I posted on Instagram. Nothing I followed her. Whatever, Jacquelinovac and Pat who let me tell you something, Pat went off the rails. That's right. Jacquelinovac is a very

talented woman. But I have But she has like seventeen thousand followers on Twitter, which is a nice amount if you don't have a lot of followers. I've got a lot more than that, and I try to keep up with every tweet. What I'm saying is, I don't think she has so much that every seventeen every every one of those people is seventeen thousand tweets a day. Where she didn't see my tweet, I feel like I'm defending him, sticking up, I'm advertising for you. Tweet me back. Enjoyed

the show, Hey, thanks glad you could make it. You know something, I'll blow your side and whatever. By the way, she did not say jerk on. I should have told her that in the tweet, right, yeah, A very least she could have said jerk out, jerk out, So my friend clearly wanted to flick out of that show. In the middle, you would have dipped. I would have dipped. I definitely would have dipped. You know me way too well. I know you're way too well. Um should we You said you had a thing. I got a lot of

things I don't have. I have a couple of things. I mean, I got some things to reason. I wanted to follow up on something that was originally gonna bring up here on this podcast, but it came out on the fifteen minute morning show because Danielle made me so angry with it. Well yeah, but if you did it, you yelled after we stopped the podcast, You're like, should have saved it for the broad Book on Boys podcast.

The point is, I was we were talking about shopping versus your shopping in person, versus having groceries come to you. Danielle prefers her groceries to come to her. But the one thing that I love most in life in going places. I mean, I you know me, I like, I'm a man of convenience. I like coming to me too, your couch guy. I love that. But when it comes to groceries and shopping, I need to do it for myself. And she called the bougie for that, but I think

it's bougie to shop from your phone, so touche. However, I should have had the clip of you screaming when you yelled no, they give you bad produce on fresh. I went in his firsthand. I went to a Whole Foods a couple of weeks ago. I went to the Whole Foods a couple of days ago, and and I'm looking at all the shoppers shopping for people on their phone, like there's like a whole fleet of them that come in in the middle afternoon, and I see, I know that all these groceries are going to end up on

some people's doorsteps. Well, they take no pride and no care in in shopping for people. They have their list on their phone and they run through the supermarket as fast as they can to get those orders fulfilled. They don't check the produce, they don't check sell by dates on things. You know, I want. The one time I got food on the milk from the back, I got cottage cheese that expired the next day. Like what the

hell am I supposed to do with cottage cheese? Because because I know that when I'm there in person, I'm going behind. I'm going to the back of the display because that's where they put the new stock. The new stock is used when you go to the big stock. You go to Walmart, they have like a hundred milk out hundred jugs of milk. The ones that are fresh, you got the ones in the back. The guy just

restocked because they put the freshest in the back. Just grab the ones in the back, right, there's no law against that. There's no Why do you want the milk that expires in four days? Get the one in the back the night when somebody else is doing the shopping and it's not their money front, they'll just grab what they grab and go, grabb and go. It's hapless, it's it's rushed. Sometimes they second milk has five or six extra days, and that's a cell by date. By the way,

you have to be carefully. You don't confuse sell by with used by. Well, my girlfriend is it all the time with the used by date. She completely f stet up. She's like, oh no, she throws it away. I'm like, what are you doing? That's sell by? You still got another good week in this right. That means you're gonna they know you're gonna have the milk in your house for a week. You do the stiff test because they don't know how long you're gonna you're gonna open it up,

leave it on the table. They just wanted out of this store before it goes bad. I just wanted to have peace of mind. I'm really done with this conversation. You go go to the fifteen minute morning show if you want to hear five people screaming at each other. It was good. It was like the Brooklyn Boys, but more people, with more people. Um, did I talk about signaling? Did I talk about that last week with what I

got it? Okay? Oh yeah? Left? No no no no. When you're driving and I talked about this when you we talked to this on the podcast and I said, your signal then you slow down? Yes, yes, yes, okay, I got. I got into a fight yesterday. My mom in the car right so we're driving, mom, leave your mom alone. She was my mom was fighting. My mom was in the car, so I'm driving in the right lane. Okay. I got pulled over to unrelated to this star. I pulled over yesterday. Did you pulled David Brodye? Well, no,

I pulled it. I pulled a mom of Brody because the police officer went to her side of the car, and so the windows rolled down and I said, I'm tell we sorry, officer. I wanted to get my mom home. And she says, officer, I'm so sorry. I have to pee very badly and I have a bladder condition, and he goes, I'm so sorry. Please continue. Oh that's great, that's awesome. I've already got us out. And because you know, my my husband was a police officer, and I you know,

I wouldn't have asked my son to make that. She pulled the car. She pulled the card my father. Second second pull you pulling the card, my father. We were on the job at one. But that's legitimate matter that I legitimately weren't here for this range. But you're not legitimately of us. My mother didn't say. My mother didn't say she was a police officer. We're gonna be eating really,

because I just got you four. Everybody hurt wing. By the way, we have to edit that because that guy I can't have his There is no reason have his voice on that. I feel like we should. We'll chop that down. We'll chop it down. It's already been choped by the time. He has already been chopped. And don't ask for the uncut because no, just no, just no, Brody is going to dinner. I don't know. We'll find out next week. Okay, So we're driving on this. It's a three two lane road. Right, left, lane is was

it an old town road? No? No, because I didn't I didn't take my horse. And so the left lane is moving slowly and the right lanes moving okay, but I want to go I'm gonna go straight, so I get in the right lane. And this is the bullshit about public roads. Everybody has one of these. There's no signs that say the right lane is right lane only until you get right up to the end of the lane. And then there's an arrow painted on the ground which you can't see because they will are the cars in

front of you on top of that arrow. So why is that right lane is right? Turn on? Right turn on? So I want to go straight, so I've got no choice now. Then this is before I got pulled up with the left lane. Have the arrow going forward? And yeah, right forward and to the left it's most No, it's forward.

So when the when the light changes, I'm four car lengths from the light because now I've stopped and I realized I'm far lengths length you said links length lengths Yeah, okay, So I stopped and I put my time, I put I put my signal on in hopes that someone will let me in. Now I'm not a chiseler. I didn't drive up on the end to cut in it. The last second I realized I can't go straight to common mistake innocent enough, and I put my signal on. Hopefully

there's no one behind me. Someone will be kind enough to know I'm fucked. Can you just let me in? Right? I looked to my left to see if I can get in. I haven't moved my moved my car, I haven't made an attempt to cut in front of anybody. And a woman in an suv I can see on face, has a look on a mean face going She's like, you're not fucking getting in here? Fuck you, you're fucking yeah. Of course I haven't done anything except I looked like. So she rides she she fucking rides the ass of

the of the car in front of her. So I say to my mom, hold on, that woman just cursed me out. My mom says, David, don't, don't do it, mom. She goes, all right, fine, So so I give her the look. I go, you know what, I wasn't gonna cut in, not fucking going in front of you, and you got in front of her. So as we go, I'm pulling up I'm on the right side. No, so that.

So what happens is the car in front of horror when it goes to the intersection, speeds up like like boom goes because the other car in front of that car pulled to the right lane. So the car in front of hard pull. So I zoomed the cutter, but she gave me the look you're not gonna pass me. I got a hand me, dude, I got a charger. I went right, blue hut doors off cut in front of her, and I see her in my rear of a mirrorging so so, so I I give her the

reverse fingers through the back window. I do the dance. I'm doing the waves, the whole thing. I open up my moon roof for give her the wave. Did she see all of it? She saw all of it. So then I she said, we're pulling up to the next line. I see her pull into the left lane, the right lane. Rather, I'm in the left lane. Now she's in the right lane, one car behind me. So that there's a truck next to me, pickup truck. She's behind me. My mother says,

you gotta go straight. Here I go, Mom, I'm making a right She says, no, no, no, no, you gotta go straight and go. Mom, make the right and I'll turn around later. I'm making a right, she says. He says, it's just to me. You're not gonna let it go, are you? No? So I say to the guy I waved to the truck driver, and I go, I want to pull him behind you can you go? And goes oh yeah, okay. So he goes through the street and I cut her off again and make it right. But

you don't have to go right. But I waited. I cut her off, wait until the light was gonna change. Right. I made a spite right and I made the right and it was a no turn on red, so I made the right and then I the light changed so she couldn't make the right on red. So then what I did? She stuck at the light. I then I make a you turn on this side street because now I gotta go back and make the right. She's stuck at the light. She's at the light. So I go up to the light now and she's to my left

at the light and I'm there again. Yeah, I'm like the light. I'm like a horror movie villain, and I give it a light delight. I give her the finger again. Now perpendicular, I give her a finger again, and my mother goes, are you done? Now? You got it? Three times? I said, yes, right now, I'm done. Now I'm done. She was a new driver, she was seventeen. This cry fuck you suv lady. No, no, she was. Yeah, look at me, the jungle in the road, kicking the road.

The woman in the suv, guy in the pickup truck could do it every wance. That one snuck up on me. Gotta be quick, you gotta be quick. You got I was quick. I cut that woman off. I got you. See this horrific haircut. Yeah, I'm looking at Chelsea, not you. I'm sorry, Dick. Sure I didn't see it on Google. She googled like this, this awesome haircut. It's one of those under shave cuts where you lift up the hair and then it's all shaved underneath, and then they design.

These are good, the design and the scal Yes. But what she what she questioned, was this, and what she got was this. She showed a picture of the pattern, right, and so what she got was like a map you'd see on a kid's menu at a bad at a theme restaurant. It's all over the place. It's terrible, and she says, I wanted this haircut. I had not received a professional haircut in about a year. I always still I always have an undercut because my hair is so

thick shaved underneath. However, this time I wanted to spice it up, and I gave them the design that I wanted shaved. So she assured me she can do it yeah, and started cutting. However, she totally funked up, as you can see by these pictures. I had no idea until I asked my nana to take a picture because I obviously can't see the back of my head. Now wait a second, pause, don't they show you give you a mirror, wouldn't she ask to see the mirror of what the

hair look left? Halfway she went turns like. She went home and saw her nana, and her nana was like, what the funk happened to your hair? She was shocked when she found this out. I was, I was, why don't you go to a place that like it's best. They specialize. They have all the pictures of the graphics and the designs. You gotta go to a place that's that's their thing. Well it's not apparently wasn't their thing. She wants to know how she gets free dessert out

of this situation. Uh. She loves us so much, loves us on The Big Show and the Brooklyn Boys podcast Crack Me Up. That is from Chelsea hashtag slice for Life. Al Right, well, I I got and be honest. Um, you just gotta take him to task. You just gonna go back and say hate my haircut? You can't do it a month later? No, yeah, you strike while the iron is hot. Yeah, and it looks like that's what they used, by the way to cut her iron. Melissa Rose on Twitter, I wished to be a happy birthday.

She said, may your diet coke be ice free and your food di well, she wrote void, but I know she meant devoid devoid of anything green. That was really nice. Now am I wrong that I told back there and I said, just you know it's devoid. I want to know. No, you gotta correct? Um? Can I talk about Mark carg real quick? Mark car saw this on the J. C. Penny website and was confused as fuck. There's a men's section and a guy's section. What exactly is the difference? Uh?

You're you're in the guy's section. I would be in the man's section. That's the difference men's drop down men's clothing, right, and that's this guy's clothing and their separate sections. So guys are what for guys are for boys? Well, no guys is like you like Brooklyn Industrial, Hey look at that guy. That's you. Hey, look at that guy. Way guys formal men's man, it's like a man's like, look at look at that man. That man's dressed. Well, that's

a good looking man, dressed man. That's dressed man. So someone walking out of the cover of someone on a GQ magazine, that's a well dressed man. That's a man, right, guy closing with clothing would be like, hey, look at that guy. That would be Peter Millar. Yeah, that's a good guy. Yeah, look at that guy that Guys like the Abercrombie guy. Hey, look at that guy you Brooklyn Industrial, they were like, hey, look at that guy. Scary. You don't dress like a man all the time. You're just

a guy. You look at guy you draw smoking jacket on, you know, you know a man in a jacket. Look at that guy in the jacket. A couple of episodes ago. Hold on, I got a question for you. Back to my friend Jeff. He he bought a suit. He went to a an Asian tailor. It's important I say that to the story, I think, and she says to him, it is. It's still funny this podcast. It's funny. So the woman syste him, how do you want your cuffs? He says, what do you mean? She says, regular or original?

Regular or original? Oh, I know what that means. I'll tell you how it is. But that's that's that's the same thing when okay, I don't know how it is in the cuff world, but in the in the alteration of genes world, regular and original are different. Original means they literally cut the bottom of the genes off, and then when they restitch it, the bottom of the genes, no matter how short they make it is the original gene.

Regular is when they just make they just make the the alteration and you know they folded in the whatever they do their own, it's not the original bottom. It's much it's much more expensive. It's much more expensive to get the original bottoms of the genes. Yeah, that's what that. So cuffs maybe the same way. Brodie where it's do you want the original cuff the way it was on the sleeve or do you want us to do a hack job and we it's cheaper when it's regular? Is

that what it is? That is I'm applying something that I know is fact to another part of a different article of clothing. I'm that's how they do jeans for sure. Yeah, because the alterations are always different. It sounds to be like regular and original mean the same thing. Okay, okay, so uh someone just texted me and said, are you available? Who works in our industry? And I wrote back, I'm recording, not Let's see what they say. Right back again. No, let's see what they say. Hold on, I wanted to

read something here. Oh oh, I gotta I gotta free ship for us. Okay, go ahead, Well no, I was gonna all right, continue, I want to thank uh Margaret, Hey, Uren, that's too long, I can't read it. But free ship for us. Hey, guys. Per the last podcast, our merchandise podcast, we talked about the merchandise who want to create? I got you, guys, Brooklyn Boys pop sockets. I'm sending these in the mail today from Virginia. Let me know once you get them so good boys to give the stuff

free for us. So you blew that one on us. Okay, So what they did was they took our logo off of one of the podcasts or the websites whatever, and they went to pop Grip, not a sponsor, and created Brooklyn Boys pop sockets. That's amazing. Thank you so much for doing that. They spent their their hard earned money on us. They designed it. So I think we will definitely have Brooken Boys podcast pop sockets. We're gonna have merchandise are now we are scary and iro in the

process of planning our live broadcast. Oh my god, hold on, we probably shouldn't say something because it hasn't been planned. It's gonna be sometime between now in the summer. Bertie, you do realize that on my previous podcast we would make these empty promises and we talked about and we never deliver. We're gonna have a merch store. We're gonna have free dessert, yes, yes, And I don't want to

give away another thing. You had a great idea. I'm not gonna had an amazing We have some amazing ideas. We won't we won't pop the amazing idea off until we were there the pop socket, though we did mention the pop sockop sockets sockets. Kevin Kozlowski, UM, I want what I heard us talking about cashhos, cash shoes, cash cash shoes. He said we should do a parody to Boogie Shoes by Casey and trying bag Mama my cas shoes. I want to put on my ma, ma mama, my

cash shoes and eat them with you. You wouldn't put on cash shoes. That's leave the parodies to me. I do like that song like Kevin Kaslowski said, yeah, you've got something there, Bertie, Yeah, maybe like I want to eat some I want to eat some big cash shoes ka ka ka kat cash shoes. I just did it without the kaka. I want to eat some good cashoes. Madeline Jerasi or Jerossi wrote, I can't wait for the merch uh. I hope this store opened soon. I will

Pop sockets are a must. Just wanted to thank you all for letting us into the ins and outs of your daily lives and frustrations, more frustrations than anything else. I hope you all get higher than nine this week now. He felt a number twelve on the I Heart Radio Top one podcast. I'll tell you why. We had the the senior vice president of our company in the studio here on thusday, and I said, I said, hey, Tom, uh because, oh you know what, it was pissed me off.

He didn't mean to piss me off. He's he's a good man, especially since he you know, he's the king of the company, one of the he's the he's the prince of the company, one of the princes. And I said, oh, you know, Tom, you've been posting some really great stuff on your Instagram. He's been going to some cool small venue clubs with major celebrities. He hangs out with the superstars. But to him, it's like when I grow up. Yeah, you gonna throw his last name around. That's fine. Anyway.

I love him. I love Tom Palmer. He hired me. I gotta love him. You know what he did for me one night. He took me out and brought me a steak dinner. He did. He took me out to buy stake dinner too. Got for a big gass. He took me up. Yeah, no, Tom's got the got the company called. I love Tom anyway. So Tom says, yeah, you know, I've been to some great events. This month. I went to the Heart Radio Music and goes the I Heart Podcast Awards. So I said, oh, yeah about that.

I said, how's Calling O'Brien doing And he says, what do you mean. I said, well, Tom Caran O'Brian won an award for Best Comedy Podcast. He says, oh, yeah, yeah he did. Yeah. Oh he's nice. He got to meet everybody. Yeah, I said, you know, Scary and I weren't there. He says, how come. I said, well, we weren't nominated, and uh, you guys weren't paying for it like you did last year. You flew us out. So he's like, you know, not really involved in the podcast selection.

But I said, you know, Tom, Scary and I two weeks ago were number nine in the whole company and we were the highest ranked podcast if anyone who works all I Heart Radio. Your company, Tom, the company that you helped run. And he went, really, that's interesting, really, and he goes, let me look at the chart this week. I go, all right, this week with number two behind

Breakfast Club. But they had a big movie. Well we know, but the second holdest employee, right, And I don't mind losing to the Breakfast club but the Breakfast Clubs podcast is a rebroadcast of the podcast, right, we're doing an original content. So I could then rephrase it and say for original content podcasts, we were number one again this week for I Heart employees. So I said, you know, it would be great if maybe next year we you know, you nominate some of the I Heart media employees who

are highly ranked, you know. And so he was like, no, no, it's a great idea. And I was a couple of things to well, hopefully, hopefully we'll see what happens. But uh, look here comes the hold on. Okay, hold on, okay, hold on, hey man, we're recording a podcast right now. And I said, I wonder if the guy I just texted and told him I was recording will text back even though I just told him I'm recording, period, I just won five bucks love you? Period? Was that voice

to text? And so, so, why when you say I'm recording, they feel the need to text back again? Right? So I just yeah, okay, he's gonna text back now, like she's sorry, who is this person? I'm not gonna tell you, but he handles all of our affiliates alright, Kelsey, Why don't we a funny tweet from Kelsey you go alright at K pair twenty one at David Brody thought you'd

find this funny. Reminded me of the Brooklyn Boys episode where we heard a clip saying a little less than over a minute one of the best clips we've played a little leges. So she said, she sent me this, Um, I guess it's a news report tweet from wherever San

Miguel is. San Miguel Sheriff tweeted this out. There's a picture of a police car and a boulder in the middle of the road, and the caption says, large boulder the size of a small boulder is completely blocking eastbound Like if like, what we're they trying to say large balld in the size of a small planet? What were they saying, large ball in the size of a small boulder? What is that? That's at sheriff alert? Oh that's a good twitter. Louis Zavala said, I have a quick and simple,

funny sex story. What's up? This was the sex quick and funny. Well you'll hear in a second, but this was in relation to the episode where we were talking about how I someone someone fell all right, someone fell asleep while I was having sex with them. Remember that? Mhm, what's up? Guys. My name is Louise and I'm from Miami, but I'm actually in l A for dental school. You guys are the bomb and help with some major distraction

from the stress, so I appreciate you. Long story short, I was once with my ex girlfriend and one night we were doing our business. I found myself down south pleasing her, and I actually ended up being the one to fall asleep while I was down there. Oh, I caught myself dozing off, and I honestly couldn't believe. What's this person's name, Louise, Louise, Louise fell asleep? Yeah, I started chuckling at the thought of it while I was

still down there. We broke up a while ago, and to this day, I'm not sure if she is aware of that happening, but I can probably say I have pleased a woman in my sleep. Hashtag slice for life. Thank you, Louis. I think we've all pleased a woman and I'll sleep. He fell asleep at the wheel, Yeah, yeah, yeah? Did he just use it as a pillow just like I don't know. I want to put my head down. You didn't get involved in this conversation very much. But

Shady Ju Mobster, who was one of our loyal tweeters. Um, they wrote, remember last week, we're talking about the movie of You, and you kept giving away clues as to the movie. Yeah, so he wrote, this is for Scary jo Oh, this is Scary Jones. According you, I'm not giving anything away, but Jim Carrey serious movie surprise ending, Browsky, you gave it away. No one's wondering if what you were talking about. Um okay, So I wrote back, Hey man,

Scary did I didn't give anything away? So he says, um, no, I was. I was referring to Scary, So I said, but you called him Browsky. Brosky is a nickname for like Brodie Brody Brosky. You wouldn't call Scary Brosky. So when you called him Browsky, I assumed you meant I gave the end of the movie away. So he says, I didn't know you had the singular ownership of Browsky. So first of all, so then he goes, all right, I'll refer to Scary Jones a brocef. I go, no,

you're missing the point. Bro is brody. People call me Browsky sometimes Joe, what's up? Brosky? Like is a goof. So I said, like, you should call him like like Jonesie or like scares Key. But you can't call scary Brosky, you know what I mean. But he was talking about you though, He was like, dude, you get way into the movie Brosky. But wouldn't you think that was he was talking about me? Yeah? Right, yeah, I didn't give

away anything. This was someone sent this to us. It's not Look, I'm not making fun of the tragedy, Okay, I'm just telling you what the caption said. And one of our listeners sent this to us and said, that's unfortunate. And I heard three newscasters say this. This was about the helicopter crash. I'm not making fun of the crash. The caption on Breaking News says l A County fire chief quote. Unfortunately, all survivors on board perished. They're right,

they're not survivors. Yeah, all passengers perish. You wouldn't say, yeah, all survivors on board. There were no survivors, right, survivors didn't perish. That's terrible right there, that's terrible. Who wrote that the sheriff said it, and then the new service quoted him. Uh Nelson Abrams on Twitter. I love that. Just heard a new one to add to the then number eight TM machine conversation. First time I've ever heard someone call it a GPS system. I guess that person

is not a slice. That's correct GPS system. That would be that silly Global Positioning system. Uh. T White Senor, huge fan of the podcast and Walkers and Talkers. According to Scary, the hat is cool because if you know, you know, but then the same rule doesn't apply to the f you Ape seventy seven shirt. You said no one would get the joke, but you said if you know the Miami do you know what? I retract that

then yes, that's why APE seventy seven shirt could work. Okay, but that goes along with my argument that if you know, you know, if you don't know, then you don't know. Tara Up, Yes, I I take that back, Tara Bagaman, I just don't think they're gonna sell very many a right. Tara Baghman a fan of both of my podcasts our She's the dog trainer, um she uh the agility dog Agility trainer. Uh Brooklyn Boys my favorite podcast ever. That means Walkers and Talkers a second favorite. I'm fine with that.

And I will buy everything and your highly anticipated merch store. I will proudly run my agility dogs in an f U A set i'd love. Also, I'd love a water bottle or a glass that says no ice hashtag broken boys, merch. Uh, let's say a couple more here. Oh, this person says, they know, damn well, what movie you're talking about? Damn you scary? Hashtag brody and scary. And it's okay that you do. And it doesn't adn't give anything away, right, you've seen the trailer, say Levy Monum says no disrespect

scary Jones being from Miami. If my girls and I saw a guy wearing a hat from eleven Miami, we'd think they were a douche or trying too hard hashtag don't do it. Um. Okay, let's see, Oh, Olympus Olympus five wants Olympus s five. I don't know what they want property of shirts. They want property boys. That's a definite, and that's a definite. Uh, that's a given. Okay, and then uh, you benefited from benefiting. Okay, what can we

do for what can we do exclusively for women? I need you to help me with this so we could false not false. Let me think about that, well, tank top maybe little tank top. Okay, Kayla has a question for both of us. Saw this on a dating app. Should I like him back just so I can correct his spelling and then remove the like? Yes, that is what Dale forty one years old wrote. I'm on my second and now see this is why I said, don't attack the guy. He says on my second career, I'm

retired from the navy. Right away, I was like, no, he served our country, don't go after him. But he wrote, definitely have my life together, been to twenty five countries, lived on three continents. I'm blah blah blah, hater of drama, someone who doesn't have their life together. Oh, I'm a hater of drama. Comma. But then the way the sentence is phrased, it doesn't play right. Hater of drama, comma, someone who doesn't have their life together, comma, no respect

comma and misuse of grammar. Okay, first of all, it looks like he's saying, I'm a hater of drama. I'm someone who doesn't have their life together. I don't have any respect and misuse of grammar. He capitalized grammar and then spelled it with an E R. I love that. I love that. That is the best. That's ironic. That is ironic. So everybody who says the police on a misspelling and they spell grammar with an e R is

a hater of people who misuse grammar. I spelled grammar with an E R. Are you sure he wasn't doing it on purpose? Nope? Alright. And this person sent a sign which when we do our live show, we'll be able to show the show with this sign. It says, do not touch bread with hands, please use tongue. And then I have one quick free desert story from DJ Sky just wanted to share with you. I got a four credit from Verizon because of an hour way time

and lack of communication on their end. Thank you for teaching me the way, Master, This is the way, which is a Mandalorian quote. Slice for Life brought and scary so free dessert. They got four in twenty hours. Um, all right, so you you're you're in a rant city right now. I am the mayor of Rant City. But I did. I did the I did the rant about I did a rant already. I'll throw one more thing. And I want to give a tribute to my friend Carlos as we get out of it today, because my

birthday and I want to go celebrate. It's about time. Carlos was is from Peru. Originally we worked together when we managed I managed restaurants. Were both assistant managers at the time, and Carlos was in the country maybe six or seven eight years, spoke English fairly well, but he wasn't add percent comfortable with the idios ms atic idiomsdy. I corrected myself right away. I apologize. And so you know the old expression, oh you got a quarter inch

dick right quarter foot? Why did you give what the ending? Because you've told that joke on here ten times. I'm catching people up to yeah, because Elvis brought it up in the room this week and I was like, should again? No? I no, I was just bringing people up to speed for the because well where else would have gone? But the punchline you just gave away episodes. I can't remember everything we've talked about. We've done that joke three times on this podcast. It again quot baby. Yeah right, okay,

you wanted to add to that. Hey remember that story in that joke, now, why don't you there was a follow up about Car about Car. I just wanted to bring it up because, uh, it's just Elvis brought up again. It's them my life FML. I can I can't, I can't leave what salary man? Okay? So what about all the people with me? Safonia, the Arians, the pans. Where do we come up with? Yeah? Okay, the people crazy to the max? No, I'm not making my say. I'm

not consensitive to the max, not calling pretty crazy. I'm gonna have a happy birthday. I will let you guys know next week if I ended up with dinner reservations at the steakhouse, that's scary tribe but failed to get me help. And by the way, Bertie, yeah, don't forget super Bowl this weekend. You made me pick my pick. You chose my pick for me. Yeah, on the last episode,

we did it live on the episode I did. I have Kansas City chiefs think by a point and a half, so they have to one by two in order for me to cover. For me to call up, I'll be fine. But if you're losing on my fault. I don't know any money you ship you and Jeff. I'm not giving him a penny either. He didn't like Jeff. He didn't he didn't like to play. It's not my problem. You made a pick for Jeff. No, I picked a plate.

Didn't like it. Huh. Happy birthday, buddy, thank you. One day this week, trip to Brooklyn, nice boy after dr Fat loss is done by jingle. Hit the jingle. I don't care if the show's over. You can't do that over. No, you don't get to hit the chang. Hit the damn jingle, Bitch, it's my birthday. Dick was a scary