#111: Porn Stars, Popcorn and Praying Cows

or a nationality. But wait, didn't In Judaism they celebrate a new year every and you guys are on year the four towns, like four thousand, five thousand, five thousand something, seven hundred and something. The Chinese. Chinese New Year's coming up, Gung High, Gung High. But that's not happening yet. Do you know what it's about to be for the Chinese? The Year of the Rat? Wasn't it the rat? Recently? I read that it was the year the Rat coming up?

So you know, I mean, I don't know when that happens. It happens pretty soon though, Oh my goodness, Uh, why you are you trying to cross reference my knowledge of the Chinese culture. I thought last years the rat well, and you know if if you if you're a union yeah it's coming up. And if you're a union buster, then it's either year of the inflatable rat, right, because

they put that outside your building. But we were in a diner last week, the family and I were all eating and we had those menus that have the twelve or twenty whatever it is, that's twelve twelve animals and it lists all the years. So if you're born in this year, you are like you're a goat. It says like you would be a match with someone born in it's like every twelve years or every four whatever version of horoscopes and and the astrological signs right. And so

so we're eating. You know, we're a Chinese restaurant. For Christmas, we went to that. That's what we do. My people hashtag tribe. Uh. And so my daughter says, she reminds uh, we remind her what year I was born and my wife was born. She goes, oh, you guys are on a match, and my wife's like nope, like ripped that stupid menu up. You know, the little place Matt knows

all yeah, I guess knows bad fortune and good fortune. So, by the way, speaking who the on the on this note, who would want to be born in the year of the rat? I mean the year the dragon is the one with the good luck, right, the big one is the year the dragon. But you know, I don't believe in luck. You don't believe because you haven't had I haven't. No, no,

I have my point with luck. And somebody somebody texted in and was like Elvis said something like, oh, if you're getting married blah blah blah is good luck, and they texted it, no, no, no, no no, no, no, that's bad luck. It's good luck when you blah blah blah. I'm like, listen, either you, you and your your spouse, they're gonna have a good life or not not because you had pepper in your pocket. Like like what I mean,

whatever the stupid ship was. If your life is determined by a pepper packet in your pocket, then you have that's not packet in your pocket. And by the way, that's not the thing. I just made that while you're watching Pepper Pig right, and you're like, oh, our marriage failed because I didn't have a pepper packet in my

right pocket. It was on my left pocket. Well, there are a lot of people that that believe that, you know, bringing um, what is it a rabbit's foot to uh to the casino gets you get you more money or not? Good luck for the rabbit, no, awful, awful, But you know, I I really people need to believe in something, right, So sometimes the the stupid stitions that they're out there, they well, how about you believe that none of them are real? I believe in that in cynicism, okay, cynicism

and sarcasm. I did want to talk about one thing as far as because this is the first show of the year, New Year for us, and um, I wanted to talk about New Year, New Year's, New Year's Day, and so I UM I sent out a tweet the gist of my tweet and my Facebook post. It was just a reminder, it's New Year's Eve apostrophees correct new year apostrophe, but it's the eve of the new year, and it's happy New Year, right, that's the correct way to say it. Now people people combined them and say

happy New Year's, Happy New Year's. Now I understand that you could say, well, maybe they want you to have a hundred good years. That's not what their intention was. Your intention was to say happy New Year. Okay. So I put that out there and some people who appreciate good grammar were like, thank you, thank you for the reminder, or that drives me crazy. Also, whatever called an asshole? No,

nobody called me an asshole. They called me an asshole apostrophees. Anyway, So we we're on vacation for two weeks and we had someone filling in helping out with our social media while we were off, and so I get a tweet that says, hey, I'm all about not saying Happy New Year's but your Elvis dur In morning show account is guilty of that. And then we went right to the account.

One of them said happy New Years with no apostrophees. No, no, not no, it's not it's the No, it's the guy that so he wrote he wrote Happy New Year's Eve, no apostrophies, and he also wrote happy New Year's So I changed it. I let him know, Hey, man, if you can fill in next year, this is the deal.

I also want to say, because we're starting a new year, the listenership, the download amount of the people who listened to episode one ten fisted and forked, uh is twice as many listens as a normal good episode for us off the charts. What I need to know is why, And I think and I think I do know why, because we had that one sitting out there for three weeks. It was kind of like the milk that's been in the refrigerator that's just gone sour. So but but you

you need that last SIPs. You keep going back in, or you listen to it over and over. Nobody listened to it the day we posted it, because we can see how many listens each day. So what happened was we posted it on December twenty or whatever, it was like, Okay, a few thousand people listened, no big deal. But on Christmas, I guess when people started like getting off their jobs, it went through the roof and since then it's been

like a bunch of thousands every day. I also think it's because people did not listen to the big show, because we had a lot of well here's here's where I'm getting. I believe not only did the loyal slices that people listen to us hardcore I listened to it. I believe the children are our future. I believe the slices are future. I believe we got a lot of people looking for content because there was no big show. We have a lot of new listeners. So if this

is your second new episode, we're sorry. I'm not because we haven't given you any kind of yet. Here's what I will say, um M, and I will read some tweets and emails later in the show about people who tried to listen out of order and apologize and went back. I don't want to kick you off this episode. Go ahead and finished this one, but we're asking you newbies go back to zero and start listening. Listen in order.

That's our big thing. And the other thing we need to let you know is we we suggest you listen and not download. Please do not download the episodes because they're kind of like a mark against us. It's it's so weird the way that they do their algorithms. Okay, but we want to be able to you know, I have I have a goal this year. Okay. I know we've been cracking the I Heart Radio top one podcasts by being nowhere, but in the Apple podcast world we're not showing up. Then I want us to break their

Apple two hundred. What did it take? So does that mean have to listen to the through iTunes? I don't know. By the way, when you listen on iTunes, we still get credit in the I Heart world because that's our company. So people have been asking, well, if I listen to ten episodes in one day, will that help you on the top one hundred countdown? Listen? If you listen to ten episodes, it helps us get clients and sponsors because we can show how many people listen. But this this dinky.

We love it, but there's a crazy system they use on the Heart radio top on Hundre podcast and I've tried to explain it on Instagram, but here it is in a nutshell. You you get credit. We get credit for one person one episode per day. If you listen to five, we get one. But if you were to listen to an I Heart episode, then go on your laptop, listen on Spotify and go on you whatever did you change apps? We were on Pandora, were on Spotify. We want to build up Spotify and play Android, Google Play.

So but but if you if you really want to hook us up, if you don't, if you download it, listen to five times. There's no way to catch your download. They can't count that. So anyway you want to help us out, We want to make the top ten this year. People have been texting us at before we even signed on, asking about and we don't normally do phone calls. We don't know not normally if he is not this is

not a New Year's resolution phone calls. No, I actually I would like to take a call, one call per episode, but Brody, then would you know I wouldn't be able to rant as long? So you know, we need to please by the way, we need somebody to like do a little bit of both. Elvis put up a great picture of the Morning Show and said a great year, and there's some reference to the Brooklyn Boys, and somebody said, I love the show. But other than the Disney rant,

haven'ten a lot of good rants lately, and I'm disappointed. Well, I'd like to think I've been doing some good now you've been doing amazing rants. You kid, also not every episode as we do on the thing legendary rants Disney was you know, I will say this, I'm a little upset, hurt I've got but hurt well because I saw Elvis earlier, and uh, he came into the studio and I'm like, oh, you're here for Brooklyn Boys, right, He just walked right

past me, goes, Nope, you gotta record serial Killers. So he he recorded an episode of the serials the Sailor Killers podcast. Now we love Andrew and we love Scottie. I binged a bunch episodes last week while I was on vacation. But some serials good stuff. The episodes, episodes, it was good, good stuff. Do you eat along with them? No? But I but I but I write all their jingles. I just did a new Alison Chain's parody for them, right. Al was thought it sucked. You don't know that, Yes

I do. Scotty Beach tell me almost thought it sucked. He was all that sucked. I think he said it on their podcast. You can listen to the serial Killers latest podcast here. We don't listen. To my point, the reason why I Butthhart is I'm like, we've been begging Elvis to come onto the Brooklyn Boys podcast since we started, since our inception, And now shall we play the jingle that I wrote for them? We haven't. I'll tell you what it's called. Okay, I guess we could and then yeah,

we could do that, but my play right here. We gotta get on our pocket. We need to campaign this year. I feel like with all the campaign going on in the real please was campaign right now. He asked him to come on this podcast to promote, to promote his book, and he said, I've done enough promotion. I'm exhausted. Why don't, Okay, let's start this hashtag hashtag Elvis on Brooklyn Boys. You know, hashtag Elvis on Brooklyn Boys. We need that, we need

to see it. Tweet it. No, you need to tweet at Elvis Duran and tell him to come on the Brooklyn Boys. He's not gonna see the hashtag at Elvis Duran, go on the Brooklyn Boys. Try check Man with the Box, see if that's in there? Man, See what that's in there? That that song based on Man in the But correct is it there? Man with the Box that I don't see it now the box? Try that. I don't know people and their grammar and left it's not. I don't see it and I don't see it in that system. No, No,

we'll play next week. The point is if Scotty loved it, that's all I care about. Scott. People have been chexting us. Let's get a couple of people on real quick for the new year, and then we'll get into we keep a max like to two of the best, all right, these are the two best ones? All right? Hello, Hello, Hi? Who's thish Tony? Tony? Where are you from? Down? And I promised Georgia? I work on four Ben And wait a minute, this Tony's in Georgia. Wow, like that, I liked.

I'll look at the Sorry, look I see he's militarized. Why you don't have to like that. Don't call us. We are the furthest thing from That's what I'm saying. Okay, well, well I get paid more on this side. Well, we salute you. We thank you for your services. First of all, service first, service first and foremost, how are you doing that? As a good weather today? I started off cod but that's about sixty five and well, scared. What's the weather here in New York right now? Oh my god, it's

thirty degrees degrees? Yeah, nine degrees. That that's how my morning started. But it didn't last very long. But yesterday, by the time I got off work, I had my c O so so I understand that you might have a question before before we go into why you texted? Where are you from? Original Florida, Tampa, Florida, Tampa, Florida and you're working in Georgia. So so how is it that you have an appreciation for a couple of idiots

from Brooklyn, New York. I was sturday in morning, so I started listening there like this, started looking at some of the podcasts, and I coach all around number forty, went back to zero and been listening ever since. Started from zero. Now you here, you go appreciate it. Now. I understand you're going through some some things right now. It says that you're starving because you've been doing keto. Yeah, so you need laughs. You need laughs from the Brooklyn boys.

First of all, um, you should I don't think that you should be starving if you're doing keto properly. I'm a little concerned. There are you following it? But what do you? What do you do? I'm following you? I'm I'm starving in the point off, I missed the pastas and the breads, and I can have some pizza, but I can't have regular beats. I gotta have like the one I've been having made out of chicken. There's a

pizza in our logo. Can stare in our podcast? Could you just say the pizza is made out of chicken. So if it's chicken, take you take canned chicken, like the cann chicken without all the additus, right, and you can take and drive that out and then flatten it out with some farmers on cheese, and you can make a crust out of it, okay, and then you put sauce and cheese on it. I hate to tell you this, it sounds like chicken palm to me. You're eating chicken

sauce and cheese. That's chicken palm. Yeah, pretty much, kind of kind of, but I mean it's good, but it's not the same as regular pizza. Hi, very good. Well listen, if you come out to the other end and the body style you want and the weight didn't good for you, And about two and a half months, I've dropped almost forty pounds. Oh God, bless you. Oh hey, cots, fantastic congratulations. You know I'm doing point of the guy write before Thanksgiving and wait to eight and I said I will

not weigh three hundreds. You know what it takes a really really um brave person. If it takes a tough man to make a tender chicken, we know that. But but it also that's a produced thing. Um, but it also tends somebody. Let me edit that out, fuck you. Um, I gotta I gotta tell you. Um. It really does take a lot of willpower and a lot of concentration, and you really need to get into a zone into you know, in in um yeah, in in living through

this and surviving this diet. Because I'm gone one right now. I'm not gonna mention it because he's gonna make me hit the jingle. Okay, but right now it's the first week is really hard. So let us know. I want you to get in touch with us somehow. Email us when when it's all over, when you hit your goals. Okay, yeah, I got about sixty more pounds, So hopefully in about three more months i'll be there. Are you caught up to the current episode with us? Yeah, I'm waiting today.

Hopefully it'll be download by the time I get off work at four so I can listen to it on the way home. All right, well listen if you can help it, just listen to it live on the phone you downloaded, we lose Listen anyway, listen, thank you, thank you very much for what I had to go in because I hard app Whenever you subscribe to a podcast and automatically sets it to download, all okay, but listen.

If it does download and you want to listen to a second time, just you know, open up iTunes or something. Let's do it there. All right, thank you so much. You know what? This man is a slice? He knows the deal. Well, you can't have a slice, unfortunately, you got you know what, You're a chicken slice for life exactly. All right. I'll send you an invisible T shirt when you meet your goals. There you go, alright done? Who's this? Hi? You're you're on the Brook and Boys podcast. Yes, what's

your name? Yeah? Hey, oh hi Brandon, Hey Brandon calling from ry Co two oh three. That would be somewhere in Connecticut. Yeah, I'm over in a Prospect. Okay, now it says you're okay, you're you're in Prospect, Connecticut eating. I'm going to get a Sicilian slice of pizza while I wait for the new podcast. Woot woot. But but how good is the Sicilian that you're eating like what dirt you have it? Yes, just the word. Like three minutes into uh the call, I just got it right now.

It's super crispy, really doughey. I ordered it with extra moss, relig She's on top and it looks just beautiful. Would you say it's about an inch and a half thick? Two inches? Paint the picture? I said about an inch and a half. Yeah, I definitely he's the dough dance or is it more like a pillow, like a cloud like like like like very sauce and it feels just perfect like he is. The biggest is the big question. Here's the big question. Did you get a corner aside?

Or did they screw you at the middle slice. I ordered the entire pieces. I got all. Now you get the whole pie. Okay, but you know what I got to say though, the middle is sense up to our friend from Georgia. He's eating uh pounded out chicken. He's on the key to diet a cannon bread. What are you getting into today? Well? I just finished all the podcast I caught up I started like two weeks ago,

and I just binged it completely. So I finally got the one ten Wait a minute, you started at zero two weeks ago and listen to a hundred and ten episodes of this ship started on the Disney, then went back to zero and then got the Hunter and ten. Wow, what are you insomniac? And listen over nights and stuff like? That's a lot of hours. And what made you listen

to the Disney? What made you start with us? Well, I have a fifteen work day most days, and I worked night shift bay shift, like all day or yeah, you're not usually You're just in my headphones at work. So I'm a machine operator, so I wanted some attention dimensions and stuff. Yea, Now, as long as we see a machine operator, you're not using like a buzz sal or anything like that would chip or anything dangerous, no CNC,

so I get to work on computer controls. All right, okay, very well, enjoy your lunch and listen and for fifth teena hours, just keep listening to the same episodes over and over again. Could you text your friends? He in fact, text your entire contact list and just say hey with the link that list, with the link from iTunes to Spotify, and here's the Brooklyn Boys. You guys check this out and then we'll we'll get a listen right. In fact, everybody listening should do that today. Just text the link

to your entire contact list. I that yeah, my girlfriend listening? And what does she think? We get really stressed out with the rants and how hey, Brodie manage us to argue for stuff because we have no backbone, Like I'm available for I'm available for a small fail. I'll come up to Brodie could pretend like he's you, Brandon, You know he could. He could actually, if you need him,

he that that should be Brodie side hustle. Yeah, I understand much he rent himself yet for how much would you charge per It depends on how big the booty is complaints, and it depends on how much I'm get the booty the pipe I'm getting like fifty dollar gift card. I can't charge more than fifteen bucks. Why don't you do a percentage? No, it's gotta be big. If I get him a thousand dollars, I want four hundred. Would you if you knew that you had a gripe with

a company and you would sick Brody on them? Would you pay Brody? You get four, you get six? I love this guy. Okay, I'm getting I'm gonna get half a pizza right there. All right for everybody listening with no backbone, Brody will be your renter. Brandon, we'll talk to you on episode two hundred. We'll see if you're still enjoying it. Okay, awesome, thank you, thanks for calling. Alright, alright, So a couple of gay good calls there. I see. I told you we're still gonna ge people who tweet

is going. I want the phone calls to go to the the way of the birthdays. The birthdays. Um, So, I got a list of a bunch of little things I gotta rant. Don't don't worry. I had had a problem at a place I've previously had a problem, so it's not a different location. But you're like, oh my god, he's got a prom with those people again. Uh so let me tell you what I got on my list here. Um, you've been getting crap all weeks Gary for this. Um the nut pronunciation, Yes, it's the it's the one. It

looks like a crescent moon. It's spelled c A s H e W. One of my favorite of the nuts. I pronounced it a certain way. I pronounced it another way. Yes, but nobody nobody says that the way you do. It's it's cash you. It's it's cash you. See. The more I say it, though, the more I pay attention to it, the more it sounds wrong. But if I don't pay attention to it, it's right. So if I want, okay, I'm going to the store, I'm gonna buy some almonds, walnuts,

and cash's almonds. It's the almonds. I get it. Almonds, walnuts and cash you. But it's cashews. So it's almonds, walnuts and cash shows almonds, and it's that pistochos. Well, I never said it was. So I'm saying that's what it sounds like to me. When I hear you say cas shoes, it's like, here, this is the problem that I had with everybody. Everybody was putting words and you're not saying, no, you're not. That's the right way. No cash hold on. I can only say it in a sentence,

all right, yeah, but you're not saying cashoes. Okay, going to the supermarket and I'm buying some almonds, walnuts and cash shows that's the right way. No, I'm going to the supermarket and I'm buying almonds, walnuts and cashows, cashosh, cass shoes. It's like cat shoose, like if a cat had shoes. Catch shoes. Yeah, cash cat shoes. You can't do it. It's cashos. Well, you did it before by mistake. You don't even realize you said it the right way. Can I can I offer you some cashows? Nope, wrong,

cash shoes. What's can I can I offer? Yeah? Yeah? Hey, would you like some cashews? They're very healthy? Cash is a very healthy. All right, So, speaking of food, I need I need your opinion on this. There's a new product out. I don't have the audio from the commercial. It doesn't really we can get away with it. You like Seltzer, love Seltzer, soda water in some space as I call it fart water. There's a new product. I'm

gonna tell you the name of it. I'm gonna tell you what my concern is, and then I'm gonna ask you if you like it, and then I need you to try it by next year. I don't know if you've seen the commercial what bud Light is now selling bud Light Seltzer. So my first question is is it beer flavored seltzer or carbonated beer? Well, beer is carbonated,

so they already have that. It's called bud light. Beer isn't carbonated, it doesn't have bubbles in it, it has foam phone but when you when you swallow, when you swallow beer, it already has a knat trule. I mean you belch from beer because it's like yeah, but I would have to think because of that, it would mean it's seltzer flavored beer, not not beer flavored Seltzer. Is its Seltzer? No, no, no, I have to think it's beer fla beer flavored Seltzer, and that Seltzer flavored beer.

So it's not because I think it's carbonated beer. It's beer. Then they put carbonation in. I don't know what I don't think it is. Wouldn't they just say it's carbonated beer. They're calling it. They're calling it bud light flavored, but bud light Seltzer. I can pull up the commercial on my phone, hold on, but they don't just they don't say what it is. Now as a as a Seltzer drinker, would you try it? Of course has the word Seltzer in it. I understand that I love Seltzer, bud light Seltzer.

There it is is it you just have like hops in it or something like that. Is it like made? Is it like a malt? Okay, because the commercial doesn't anything. Here's what bud light dot com says. They want you to go try it. Oh, I have to put my aids. The problem the problem with that. Actually it's genius marketing if you think about it. They got us to talk about it for free. They didn't pay us a dime, and now they didn't describe what it is. So you're gonna go and just have your first one out of

pure curiosity. It comes in looks gonna make a billion dollars. Flavors a black cherry. This is not a client, not a sponsor, not a sponsor. Lemon, lime, strawberry, mango, bud Light Seltzer. Blud Light Seltzer comes in fourth. Flavors a hundred calories, five percent alcohol by volume, less than a grammar sugar. Blah blah blah, unless unless it's just it's like sparkling water, cane sugar, natural food flavor, bubbly Seltzer. So so it's it's it's it's a Seltzer. It's it's

one of those, it's one of the bud Lights. Seltzer bud Light, So it's bud Lights putting their name. They're they're slapping their name on and then jumping into the flavored Seltzer market hoping that you would You're gonna be misleading. Well, no, I thought it was Seltzo beer. Here's the thing. Did you drink Seltzo beer? You would? I would? I think? Now if this isn't what it's a no lingering aftertaste blah blah and not not a sponsor meaning all this.

It makes it sound the commercial makes it sound like it's bud Light Seltzer. Wouldn't that be Seltzo beer? Then these people then it's not even beer what I think they did? What is del Monte gonna come out with? What Seltzer? Think about? Yeah, well think about this for a second. The sparkling Seltzer wars have begun. It last year was like the hottest thing, right, everyone's drinking the

sparkling Seltzer with alcohol in it. So in so this is Bud's feudal attempt to jump in and take advantage of that market and say, you know what, we're gonna put our bud name on this stuff. You understand, people are gonna buy it. People gonna buy it because it has the word bud in it, and then whatever it tastes, like, well, you're on your own after that. Yeah, I think it's party. I think it's you just describe I did black cherry?

What raspberry cherry? Right? Yeah? Okay, so it's it's probably like all the rest, but instead of vodka based, it's be it maybe beer based. No, but it's not. Now I'm looking at the website and it makes it look like it's just seltzer with some alcohol. What kind of alcohol doesn't like probably like grain like the like, like, no, it's it's it's it's actually, you know, they rubbing alcohol. People joke that, you know, white claw is really malt.

It's made of malt liquor. By the way, if you look this up and so people are now drinking malt liquor and they're comparing it to like Colt forty five, they're like, oh, so you like cold forty five, because it just so happens that white Claw is made is a malt beverage. It's a you're not you're not feeling this proud. You're calling it hard seltzer eater is calling it a hard seltzer. So yeah, so then we know what that we know it's like a hard like hard cider.

You know what hard cider tastes like. Yes, I understand it. But where's the beer they're calling it hard seltzer. It's in the it's in the actual hops. Yeah, I feel but there's some mops. There's no hops on. You don't see hops. No, I'm not. The whole thing has my day. I'm all upset now. Really, I don't always like Burpie Seltzer. Burpee wouldn't drink it either way, you don't drink yeah by by giving a shot Burpie beer a shot, you take a shot of it. I don't know. It's just

sparkling fruit ship. I don't know. I'm kind of curious now, I'm telling you this is you're in. Why as you were looking through your phone, I said, I was in. I'm curious. This is genius on the part the part of Bud and the fact that there's four Super Bowl commercials. It sounds like they're all in on this page. Well, I don't want to get any more advertising because they're not a client and not Okay, we would never do that.

Peter Malar's free advertising. But I don't know if you saw over the brain people send us pitchers of Peter Mals shirts in the mall. Did you see the sponsor? You see what I slipped in there on the Brooklyn Boys Instagram story in the middle of Nemon Marcus and I'm like, oh, looking up there, it is Peter mo Are. I shook my head. We're still trying to get them on board, you know. Yeah. Our agency people are avertising. Our salespeople called their agency. They have not returned the

call yet. Apparently they don't need any help advertising. Um, I'm really upset. I brought the story and I don't think you believed it. This came from the Daily Mail. Okay, before you read this story, scary comes into the fifteen Minute Morning Show podcast today, but it never made it on the fifteen Minute Morning by Today's was very good with a good, good, good show. Yesterday's was even better.

The one from January eight. It was a really good fifty minute morning show, also available on all your podcasting platforms. January eighth, fifty Minute Morning Show And by the way, Elvis met a woman who said she's heard every episode of the fifteen Minute Morning Show, but it's never listened to the Elvis straw In Morning show. How about that? How about that? Uh? But what I wanting to say was Scary throws out a topic to Elvis, what you're

about to hear? And Elvis says, I don't really And we all start jumping on Scary and bashing him for the topic. And they were really quite there were questions, and so Elvis goes, maybe we'll talk about it. Put your headphones on. So Scary goes and sits down next to me, and he goes, I don't know, it's a really good topic. Should It's not really a topic, it's a it's a great story. And so I thought, now let Elvis do I don't know if Brody was really

on board with it, but I'm gonna read it to you. Really, So the Daily Mail, this was your idea for a good topic. Well, it's not a topic. It was just something to put out there and put it out there in the world. So on the Daily Mail's website, the headline that's m A I L The crying, crying cow kneels in front of the butcher begging him to spare it spa. So basically, there was this cow who was pregnant.

I guess they didn't know that the cow was pregnant, but they were leading the cow to the slaughter house. Usually they slaughtered the bulls. They keep the cows for milk. And well she was she was pregnant, and they went to go slow. They were going to bring it into the house, the hamburger it. They were gonna do whatever. They had a doing it right by the way, Speaking of which, people are still wondering, Oh, is that how your mind works? Yeah, like I'm talking about cows and

you're thinking about steak dinners. Yeah, yes, I am. Well, yes, let's update people. You and I had two weeks off. Okay, here comes your update. So I got it. I got I don't know where it is on my phone, but I got a tweet that said I started listening in episode seventy nine, I think or seventy something. I listened to twenty episodes and I heard you say listen in order that I went back and I'm listening from zero now I'm up to forty again. Let me know. It's scary.

Ever buy you that steak dinner? I did twice. I tried to twice. Listen to the previous episodes. You judge for yourself. I don't know, diner. The point of this here is whatever you thought before, so araces nothing has changed. That's really this issue. We have not gone for a steak dinner since the last stick day steak didn't and especially not now because I'm on my DCTR Fat loss diet. Hit the other jingle scary. You know you're assisted not

saying it. When the guy talked about his Keto diet. Yeah, yeah, but I had to tell him there because had I been had I not been on dr fat Loss? Take the other jingle? I don't understand and maybe well, so nothing has changed, nothing has changed? First quarter scary. I know we're in first quarter. First quarter scary right now. I had an apple here. I brought four cucumbers to eat too, munch on. Who does that for cucumbers? I love cucumbers. You don't eat cucumbers raw? No, I eat him?

Who cooks cucumbers? Wait a minute, did you don't do that? On it that sound? Hey fu? Yeah? By the way, that looks like a zucchini. It's a mini cuke. Oh, it's a mini cuke. Someone's gonna make a mini puke because they don't like the sound of people chewing because they have I have to go back now. You just said my chicken. You just said, don't you eat cucumbers raw? Have you ever cooked a cucumber? And all of you

who are dying to tell us it's a pickle. We know it's not a pick with the skin on, but okay, no, I take the skin off. I don't like the skin. I oh, you know what I hate when you get it in your salad someone's house or in a restaurant. We put on top and they do the thing where they they leave a stripe so like it's got like a little skin space, a little skin space. It's decorative.

But then I have to sit there with a knife and you chop off the chop off the I don't want it because then I go, I'm surprised you when I spit it out, I'm surprised you eat cucumbers to begin with their green, but their fruit. I'll tell you what, here can I can I toss you one? Now? Your hand man handling it. I'm not like the fs are clean. Come on, you're fisting my cucumber. Here, take this one. I haven't touched it. You're touching my cukee, would you touch my cue? You want it? No, I don't want

it because you touched it, it tasted. I want you to taste this with the skin on. It doesn't taste any different with the skin on or off. That's my point. Hold on, as did you? I prefer it without the skin? Good? So can I get back to the cow story? Four skin jokes? Come on? People interrupting my lunch. Okay, So so this cow, it knew, the cow new that it was going to So what the cow does is it gets the two front legs of the cow goes into a kneeling position as if no, no, no, I'm not

walking anymore. You're gonna have to drag me now. So the cow gets into it. It It kneels before the butchers, and you could see a tear, a tear coming out of the cows. Video of this, yes, there is. Well, that's the whole point. This happened, right, It's just like the laughing cow. Cheese is the crying cow. This is the crying cow. Right around New Year's Eve, a guy in China posted this video, which went viral in China. Mind you about this cow who was pregnant. So it

clearly said the cow. The clip show the clip that's online, which you could google, by the way, google uh pregnant cow China. Uh. The clip shows the female cow thought to be pregnant, bending both front legs and refusing to walk, seemingly with tears in its hold on. I have the video in my defense of this being not real. Alright, when my wife was pregnant, the same thing happened. I didn't want to walk, cried. A lot of cow had been earmarked to be killed by an abator of avatur.

I don't know A B, A T, T O, I r um whatever um. Anyway, it kept kneeling while being transported to the business by its owner. After it arrives at the slaughterhouse, and when the butcher tried to drag it off to the truck and into the house to be butchered, it knelt and kept crying. The heartbreaking scene was filmed by one of the workers and then uploaded

to a Chinese website called wheat Chat. According to this TV stage and UH, it is likely that the cow had been pregnant, prompting it to have a stronger desire to live. After the video was widely shared, many animal lovers called the boss of the slaughterhouse in a bid to save the cow. Wouldn't you know it, they did like a go fund me, like a Chinese go fund me, whatever they do over there. They raised enough money to buy the cow from the slaughter er. They did go

China fund me. That sounds like that sounds like a giant, sounds like a dish. I was gonna say, but anyway, the cow. Uh. So, the cow was brought to a sanctionary, a sanctuary, so they you fund yeah, pretty much. So anyway, they literally saved the cow's life. People in the cow. Now it's uh at a temple and as soon as so here, listen to what the cow. Listen to what the cow did. The cow dumped over the moon knelt again, an apparent gesture to thank its saviors. It kept its

posture for as long as one minute. Maybe it just has busted knees. Nope, it stayed there for one whole minute in front of the driver. After it arrived at the temple. As a thank you, the cow cry. It was a crying cow. Okay, it was not a crying cow. First of all, maybe they have a cutting onions. I just I Honestly, when I read this story and then when I saw the video, I'll play, Well, you can't really see anything but podcast. And the guy's talking in

Chinese or Cantonese or something. So some Cantonese is a dialect of yees see, he might be I think it may be cantony whatever he's talking, and I don't know. I'm not an expert. You're not an expert on the Chinese languages. Yeah, you don't say, you know, I'm not. But anyway, he Unfortunately, you don't say one of my favorite dishes of le brown sauce. You don't say, uh next to the cream of some young guy. I didn't do that. That That was scary. That was scary. Come on,

those are the oldest Chinese. I'm not in the book. Stop you're doing you're the one that started it. No, but anyway, chow fund me page. Okay, that's fine, that's fine, that's fine. Okay, I didn't say cream of some young that's not that's terrible. After about what you're about to do in a couple of minutes. What am I gonna do? What am I gonna do? I don't know. You sit home like a twelve year old boy playing with your election. We'll get to that to say, we'll get that at

next Okay, anyway, my very my point is this. Do you think the cow was like, don't kill me, but all the other cows another bulls rather that that get that taken to the abati By the way, abati means slaughterhouse. Also it's speed metal band. Wasn't ever a fan of them, but there it was a band called Abatoar. I just think that this is a field good story of the year so far, and and it should be reckoned the old good story. Yeah. I mean after I show the video and the cow, I saw what the cow was

doing this. The cow had to know and then you have to know the I know what's behind those doors and they're gonna chop me up? What if he? What if? What if the ow just didn't want to go anywhere else because it wanted to give birth in an area it knew it wasn't it wasn't ready to give birth. It didn't drop the baby, no, but it's probably still. Animals are territorial. They pick out a spot where they want to nest or give birth. So you think it's

an absolute coincidence. I think The cow didn't want to leave its pasture where it was because it knew it one it had created an area where it wanted to. That's the case. All cows would do that, and then it wouldn't. It would be the same thing every day. It might be routine. This is not routine. They say that normally this is the only cow that maybe was born with it, like like like Planet of the Apes. It just knew where Caesar the only monkey if I

remember the I didn't see the recent ones. But Caesar was genetically modified or whatever it was. Don't tweet me. He had the brain of a human. Well he was smart. He could learn. Okay, so that's he's saying, this is the smart cow. I think, so this cow. So then riddle me this, batman. Why was the cow crying? There was There was tears that was shed. You could see tears coming off this What if? What if the cow is in from kneeling because he's got bad knees. Okay,

the cows on the on the Keto diet. Then White did the cow show it's appreciation for a full minute after temples was still bad. So you're not buying this. You think this is a bunch of I don't know in a country. In Asian countries, they people bow right, maybe the cow is bowing bowing cow. Oh, but a crying cows okay, a kneeling cow. You're in what I say? The cows bowing a bow? Cows for me? Bow bow, brown cows? Right? Come on about cow. And by the way, what what if you milk that cow? Won would come

out of the cow? Milk milk, not white nott milk. Nate from our show was like, no, I grew up in here in Pennsylvania called funding the white and called it white milk. I'm like, fuck you, and where you came from, it's not white milk. People in the South right now are disagreeing with you. You don't white milk a cow. You just milk the cow. So he was like, well, Nates, Nates, it's on a menu. It's coming out as milk, Nate, unless you live in the South, they put the word

white in front of you. Hey, okay, let's describe the color. We've had to me. Some of these people have not heard that. Okay. So the point is, milk is milk. You don't need to call it white milk. It's milk. But what about chocolate milk. Yeah, you call that chocolate milk. Go into a restaurant and order milk, and if they go white or chocolate, you just say milk again. At some point they're gonna bring you up milk and it will be white because it's milk. I agree with you, Brodie.

I just like to see it turn red. It's like, do you have to order clear water? No? Eat water? It's water? Well, what about bud light, Selker? I don't know alright, anyway, I'm done with I just wanted to say the story. You're not buying it. I think I think he is. Why I don't want to believe that that was real. Why cheeseburgers. I enjoy cheeseburgers, and someday

I'll get a steak dinner. But now you're gonna tell me Brodie, I can't take any steak dinner because the cow might have been crying when they brought him to the abbat r. Well, anyway, this cat lives on Look at Google it it's there. Do you see the video for yourself? Are you gonna swallow that cuke as a whole? No, I'm not a want I want to talk about what you did. On your vacation, because man, oh man, you must have been all right, you know it's very funny,

but you must have been bored. No, I'll tell you. I'll tell you get in first of all, I'll tell you discover this, okay, So I would never play with my I don't don't say the name, but Amazon's Echo, the Amazon Echo just had a new feature a couple of weeks ago, maybe a month ago at this point. And by the way, don't tweet me. It was six weeks ago. I got it on the front ship. Please, you can now get Samuel L. Jackson to be the voice of your Alexa. That's what they tell you, your

Echo Dot. Instead of the the woman's voice, you get Samuel L. Jackson. Apparently he went and recorded a bunch of stuff. Obviously he couldn't record every single word needed, but he recorded a bunch of stuff. So for it wass on sale normally maybe I think two dollars or two forty nine, whatever it is, it was on sale. Hey, if you want Samuel Jackson, Like, how cool would that be? Samuel Jackson says, get the funk out of bed. So it says when you go to download it, he curses

and it says parental warning. Samuel L. Jackson does use adult language. And I saw him on late night talk shows and he talked about So I'm like, wow. Because the problem with Alexa versus Google Home, Google Home will curse. It will repeat what you wanted to repeat. Right if you sell Alexa. If you say, Simons, say that a woman's name, right, Oh my god, by the way, we must beat now. And then you say, Simon says good morning,

it will say good morning. It repeats. You have to Simon says, you say, you say the name, We're not gonna say, right, Simon says, and it repeats it. Right. Okay, so you have to ask, but it's not just Samuel Jackson. You have to say, Hey, ask Samuel L. Jackson. Inform me what is the weather? Then Samuel L. Jackson, Well,

then say it's third and nine degrees right. I have not figured out a way to get Samuel L. Jackson the curse, but it reminded me whenever I want Alexa to say something, if I want Alexa explain something that might be considered adult, she won't say it. So I started experimenting, and you started out. That's how you fell into this right, you know what it was? I said, I wanted Alexa to say the P word. Of course, the U S S y. I was like, I said,

for no other reason than your own personal pleasure? No, I just whatever. So she won't say it. So I tried to get her to say other words. She won't say the C word. What were you doing when you like laying in bed naked like wanting her to you? I don't know what you just this is all out of curiosity. I was having a conversation with a friend about the stupid things that you won't say. So she won't say. She won't say pussycat. Yeah, unless you unless you say it in a way like if you say

lick my pussycats, you won't say it. So I started wondering what she would say, what she wouldn't say. So my friend and I were comparing notes on words we remembered she wouldn't say. So I tried to get her to say body parts and it was very interesting, though scary. Do you think from a vocabulary standpoint from working on the radio, is there a difference between the male genitalia and the female genital Penis and penis immagin same right, equal? Same thing equal equals in my world. I mean, it's

it's the Yeah that one is exactly. One is neither more or less sexual or dirty. Yeah, I play the clipper. Alexa Simon says vagina. Sorry, I'm not sure. Alexa Simon says penis, penis. Alexa Simon says women have vaginas, Women have vaginas. Alexa Simon says men have penises, men have penises. Alexa Simon says, kiss my vagina. Mm hmmm, I don't know that. Alexa Simon says, kiss my penis, kiss my penis. Alexa Simon says, lick my penis, lick my penis. Alexa

Simon says, lick my vagina. Mm hmmm, I don't know that. One sounds like a married man. Say so she thinks vagina is a dirty word. Yeah, or it's more sexual. I can say like my penis, but I can't say like my vagina. She won't say it. Oh that's terrible. I said. I said, we're happened to equal opportunity, we're our equal rights. I said, say penis. She says penis. To say vagina, that's silence, nothing, that's silence. Yeah, that's not right. What is what is so is? I don't understand.

I don't understand what is the difference. I guess vagina is a dirty No. But somebody, well something might say, but but but somebody programmed the computer, right, someone programmed that wrote the code obviously thinks anything involving the vagina, it's worse. Well, who is that person to decide for everybody else? I don't is it? Is it a it's not a lesbian, it's it's not. Is it a straight guy? No? I don't know. I'm not saying it's it's I'm not I don't know what to say. I don't know how

to blame. That's not equal. I'm not right. Are we're gonna complain? No? I look, let's go should call on Amazon. Let's call Amazon and they will call us right back. If you call the number, they'll call you right back. Mm hmmm mm hmm. Okay, okay. When your phone rings, pick it up. So watch the hotline. That's gonna say for calling Amazon that I'm now collecting or service. Your call maybe recorded for quality and training purposes. Please hold

while we connect you with a customer service associate. It's quick, it's quick. Watch hello, Watch I mean you think they'd be able to afford an employee to pick up within twenty seconds. It's two days. It's two day call. Oh, thank you for contacting the Amazon Echo department. I have a possible chance or Yes, I'm having a problem with my uh my echo, my dot, and I'm wondering if you could help me. Um, I can't get it to

say certain words. It won't say it. They're not dirty words, but they won't say the words, and so it'll uh, go ahead, what we can say? Oh? Yeah, Uma, go ahead? Fish. I want I want you to I want to play a clip for you of I recorded me talking to the dot and you'll hear clearly we'll talk about male parts but not female parts. So let me play you the clip I recorded myself. And then at the end of it, it's like twenty seconds. Explain to me why it won't say what it's not saying. Go ahead, here's

the clip. They I'm doing something wrong. Alexa Simon says vagina. Sorry, I'm not sure. Alexa Simon says penis penis. Alexa Simon says women have vaginas. Women have vaginas. Alexa Simon says men have penises. Men have penises. Alexa Simon says, kiss my vagina. Mm hmmm, I don't know that. Alexa Simon says, kiss my penis, kiss my penis. Okay, so you see that it won't say vagina. It says you can say kiss my penis, but it won't say kiss my vagina. It won't say the same things you say about a penis.

It won't say about a vagina. Why is that? Um? All right, let me let me chip that here. Let me to the info on the is it echoed, third generation, the third generation. Yeah, all right, let me put up on person, put up your your account. I was the email on your Amazon account here? You know what it's my wife's and I don't. I don't know the email address that's associated with the account. I apologize, all right,

that's fine, all right. So what I'm gonna do, I'm gonna check here in my end, maybe some INFU and the dots if they have a specific um, yeah, just taken away it being his vagina section. See what that is? Because I have I have daughters and they're very upset about it. They feel dirty. Alright, let me put you in cold that right back, all right, Ye, all right, he's actually checking now he's looking up the vagina code. He's looking that up. It's like the Da Vinci code. Yeah,

right now he's asking people. He's asking people right now for help. That's good, Hey Bob, why doesn't she say vagina? It's a valid question. I very expense and you I gotta say, we didn't mock. I sat there. I shut my mic off because I was about to ask inappropriate questions. Right, No, but no, we want to be taken seriously for a change, And you asked. You're very straightforward about it. Right. He's

looking up, he's asking. He's excuse me, Hey, hey, he's gonna be takeing hr at some Hey hey Mary, why is vagina dirty than penis? And she's gonna report him. I mean, but you have a you have a point. But he's looking right now in the manual. He's got the big book. He's opening the book. Book. Very important. Will be answered by the first available customer service representative. We're gonna get an answer here. We're gonna get an answer from the good people of Amazon. By the way,

I have a gripe about Amazon. You can't there's no way. Don't even look it up trying to prove me wrong. There is no way any longer I removed it from the website that you can see how much your gift card is worth without first attaching it to your account. Well that's the scamboni right there, scamboni, because then you're already halfway in, right, Like, if you're like, oh, how much is this gift card? Maybe give it as a gift.

You don't want you attach it your balls, deep ball, you're gonna use it, right, You're like, oh, if a gift trying to spend it, there's a better chance you already have shipped in your card anyway from last time. Right, it's just gonna hit the one clicks. But there used to be a button that said put the code in you want to redeem it or just get the value that The button's gone. Yeah, and I already called the Amazon They confirmed it. You know what button has not

gone to click on one? Can we say that the one click delivery that's still there? All right? What do we learn? All right? Hey, thanks for holding all right, yeah, no problem. Do we get to the bottom of the vagina. It's weird because we have a few equip devices here on in our own department I didn't try it with one of them also, but it's it's the same issue for some reason. So what what? What? What? What? What did you say to the go oh? I said, I thinking that that you were saying to a mirrors that

was like what your phone broke up? Hello? Hello? Hello? I think they I think someone, you know, when they say that somebody might be listening on the call, I think someone was listening and cut the fucking call off, Like what the what is this guy trying to do? Should we should we do it again? Like that guy actually went because I did it. It didn't he goes at the same I think you got the answer he did it. I wanted to say, I said the same to you. He wasn't okay, did you hear what he did?

At the very end, he wasn't about to repeat what you said. He just said I said what you said. The fact that he sat there and to his coworkers and maybe seven people they must have heard the apartment Simon says Vagina, they're all trying it at one. Everybody listened to this podcast to try it. If you have an Alexa, I bet you Google Home says I would tell everybody listening to this podcast to ask Amazon for the answer. Yeah, that's right. I asked him why it

won't save vagina and he confirmed it. He did. All right, I got two more clips. You won't play another clip. Let's do it. Let's do the Okay, so um. On a satellite radio, there's an adult channel. Okay, so uh, I mean it wasn't even my car, I mean my friend's car. He's got the satellite radio and he's he's scanning around for different channels, and the adult channel is near the it's in the three hundreds I think. So

it's near rock bar. We were listening to rock bars, so we're scrolling to get to rock bar, which is anyway, he he had it's the Vivid Adult Point. I don't know, so we you know, I really don't. I don't know who owns the Vivid. I think I think it's uh, I think it's called because they changed the name. I

think it's Vivid all right. Anyway, So there's a there was a point Okay, you know Joe So, the host of the show is a Point star and when you hear the clip, she's so putting on the oh yeah voice, but she's interviewing a woman who's a point star talking about this new website she's launching and how she's gonna start filming her own porn videos and doing live stuff on the website. And so she says, Oh, I can't wait. What kind of cool stuff sexually are you gonna do?

Let's see how creatively dot com? That's sexy. So guys, right side down the sis not up yet, but that will be the link to her online website for all her exclusive content. So what are you gonna be shooting on a site? Um? Lots of girl girls? Um? I want to do lots of fun creative scenes like lots of young girls. You know, Um, what was it? What else? I want to get other girls on there? And that's for sure. Yeah, she's very sexual, she's sexy content. Want

to play that again. But here's what she here's what she's gonna do on this great new site. She's gonna do some girl girl she can get some girls on, maybe some young girls and then other girls. That's the three. This is how creative she's So play it again, listen to what kind of contact? Now? This reminds me of like get you game on yea dot com? So guys, right down yet, but that will be the link to her online website for all her exclusive content content. I

heard that right away, but not listen to her. You have to have a voice assaultry voice, like yeah, okay, so that we did episode one twelve like this and have lots of content. She'll play it again and listen to the three really unique and different things this crazy Point Star is going to do just like original original stuff. You can do stuff with like monkeys said the same thing three different ways, but webs and chains, lots of girl girls. Um, I want to do lots of fun

creative scenes, like lots of young girls. You know, was it what else? I want to get other girls on there. And that's for sure. She's very sexual. She's she's like, she's very sexual. You know. I think she missed her calling to be a surgeon. Yeah, I love the poet. She goes lots of creative, fun scenes. I'm thinking not very creative. Zero, there was zero creativity. And she said

the same thing. I'm gonna do second girl girl and like lots of young girls and young girls and then I'm gonna get some other girls and yeah, oh okay, all right, well, you know, consider the source. By the way, we did listen to a couple of minute, right, Yeah, I edited out the name of it. But here's the thing. She's not a lesbian where she only does girls. She was talking about very graphic sexual acts with men. But when asked what she's gonna do, I think he's just

her mind went blank or something. She, by the way, is not the voice of Alexa, because if she was, she would say vagina a whole lot of times, a thousand times. Okay. Now here's wine cave. Okay. So you know how sometimes we grammar police each other all the time, okay, And sometimes I played clips of newscasters and I go, that's wrong grammatically. In this clip, they were talking about wine caves. Now, just to give you the story, Uh, Mayor pee boot a Jedge running for president. He had

a fundraiser in a wine cave. Yeah it's some wine place. Was very expensive and he raised a lot of money. So people giving him ship like, oh he went to a wine cave. Whatever, whatever, It doesn't matter politically, what you can whatever. So they're doing a story on wine caves. The woman's doing the story. The guy sounds like me, here we go. Wine cave was the buzzword is it? Is it? It is a thin and it was the buzzword of the night. Why is that thing cave relevant?

Such big trouble? But first, this week's global energy. Okay, So she says the buzzword of the day is wine cave. It's two words. Wine cave was the buzzword, and and then then she says, but it's the buzzword of the day. He goes, buzzwords. Yeah, yeah, So all right, where was that? That wasn't on the Vivid channel. That was that was some news show I was watching and it was on TV. He totally called her out on television. Um, speaking of which, last night, I didn't bring it the audio. Um, what

we have to take a quick break. But okay, we could do this on the other side. I don't do one more. There's a YouTube video. There's no audience the title. Now, there's a four four coming out new Thor movie. It's not it's gonna be out in a a couple of years, but they're they're casting right now. So apparently Christian Baiale is going to play a role in that movie. Right. There's a character in the Thor universe. His name is Beta ray Bill he's sort of a horse face horse alien.

Long story short, I know the comic, but so people were thinking he might be playing Beta ray Bill. So I was looking for a video that had some information on and the video said Beta ray Bill cast as Christian Bale. No, the horse is not going to play Christian Bale. Christian Bale was cast as Beta rey Bill, but the video said Beta rey Bill cast as Christian Bale. Okay, and stand, I'm saying, did you complain? I did put? I put, I posted on that. I go, that's not

what you mean. You haven't met me back. Here was the buzzword and scary my, oh my time is flying here. Yeah, all right, I gotta, I gotta, I gotta medium rand them. What do you got? I got listen stuff, but I wanted it took well, did you, uh? What do you do for New Year's? I mean people have wanted to know. They asked us where we were, Where I was. I don't care where you want to come on? I mean I obviously, I mean you were playing with you where you are? Hold on? I have audio here. I wanted

to play hold on. I gotta I gotta put the audio all the way up because this is classic scary. Now. I don't have audio of your New Year's Eve, but you do not want year? Well, hold on, I think this is you what your family. I want to play a video and I want you to hear how long after the first person says something that you say something, hold on here, just gonna give him a treat? Okay here, okay, So that's your brother. Your brother gave you a dog treaty.

You didn't want to take it, and then what you did was you threw it. Threw it. You threw it like a hand grenade, like get this away from me. You're like, no, I didn't. Your brother said give this to the dog. That means okay, so you're handed to the dog and the dog takes you throw it. I want to explain what dog wasn't even looking take it. Here's the thing, why do you hate dogs? I don't hate dogs. We were about to eat dinner. I just washed my hands, and my brother said, let's give my

dog a treat. My my brother has a coregy named Butters. Butter. So Butters was over the house first time, or it's maybe a second time in the Scary Jones household, not mine, my parents. Yeah, you wouldn't have a dog in your house. I've accepted, I would accept the pet do you want? Except how long have you lived, Scary? I don't think I've ever had actually anything that you have. I don't think I've ever had a pet in my house. No, you haven't. Never once. I didn't know bald freak RANI.

I had his dog, and you hated it. Thought that dog has a temperate problem here. That dog's an asshole. Although I hear that he's been given CBD and he's calmed down. All right, he's actually a little bit he's not as rough around the edges anyway. You'll know. You'll notice Scary no longer has a CBD client because he didn't mention it right there exactly. Okay, So butters was it was time for a treat. But I'm like, oh,

I want to give him a treat. So as he's hit, my brother's handing me the dog treat, he says, all right, now you gotta put your hand down towards the floor, because you know they're very low off the ground. Yeah, Ben down, let the dog take the treat out of the palm of your hand. Yeah. But then the dog then has to stick his face in my hand. It's not licking, licking and licking and licking my my palm. You think it takes. You're not putting tomato sauce on

your hand. It was a treat, will and you throw it like he was on fire. So I said, I said, Butters, go get it. I was trying to combine the concept of dog you treat with fetch. Okay, fetch. The dog moved three feet slowly, came over to me and wild over to me, and then I'm like, hey, go get it. And I threw it. I threw it down the hall. Okay, okay, I post the video because the dog was four feet away.

You said, hey, Butters, the second it started walking towards you, you throw it as if as if it was like a disease. Why do you hate dogs? I don't hate dogs. I'm just not comfortable around. What was the last time you touched one? You pet one? My pet dogs all the time. No, you don't. When us brings back, so here you go, hey, Max, and you wave at it. You wave at the dog. I don't wave at the dog. I get down to his level. Now there was a newborn baby. There was another video is a visual. I

can't plan on the podcast. Baby Jack, Baby Jack, your brother, your brother Stephen not an Italian name, was holding was holding the baby, and I was thinking he would like, uncle, scary, you want to hold the baby. You would not hold that baby. I did it off camera. I didn't do it for the camera. It's not on the camera. Did happen? It's awkward the way that I was holding Okay, if you must know, they filmed me holding the baby. I want that footage. Nope, deleted. We're not posting this deleted.

What did you do wrong? It's just just just throw it to the dog. Meeting kids, kids and kids and I kids and with kids with kids. They're not with with kids with kids. We're not We're not compatible, like oil and water. What did you do? What did you do? How did you hold it? By the way, was a colloquy? Did you ask, well, I didn't pick the kids? You ask I picked the kid up on the scruff of it. Did you ask if Jack was colloquy? Did you ask if Jack was colloquy? I did, yeah, you know, but

I'm trying to crazy. Did you make the face of accomplishment here? I'm I'm I'm a little I'm a little no, no, no, here's why, here's why this bothers me. Okay, what what when I see a little infant, okay, as opposed to the big infant. I know that they have soft spots in their head that that if you if they have that and they hit the soft spot in the in the wrong way, they could leave them with brain damage

and they could die. Like you don't want you so so because his skull was very soft, you know, like there's a part of that it might be colloquy. You don't want that. I I don't, and I want to make sure that his head is propped up right. It just was awkward. And then second the second I took the kid, it started pidgeoning. It started like oh, the nerve, the legs, the legs was starting to like go everywhere, like Jack. Jack is about a month and a half, a month and a half, so he's ready to run.

It's just I'm awkward with kids, awkward and dogs. Not with dogs, No, you're awkward with both because I've never didn't grow up with them. Come on, you grew up with dogs your entire life, and you didn't grow up with women. You're you're decent with them. Come on, brody, okay, do you have the video of you and uh the champagne the champagne clip. What about the champagne clip? Like scary? What are you drinking? It was New Years You're like, no, none of that, it's all gone. I didn't download that.

I thought I did. I thought I downloaded it, and I didn't download it. So if I did you kiss your wife at midnight? No? No, because we had that was a hard note. I'll tell you why I didn't kiss my my wife at midnight. We had a house full of kids. My youngest daughter had friends over that party. We were running around, serving snacks and pizza, and then when midnight came, it was sort of like we were running around. Uh, I'm trying to get my kids attention.

And then I wanted to call my mom because she was home alone, so I called my mom. That's why I didn't at the minute of midnight. I called my mom like a minute after, thirty seconds after midnight. Alright, that's why that's fair. That's fair. Um, you didn't kiss your wife. I kissed my girlfriend. You didn't kiss your wife, though, don't be a dick. Don't bead deck. Don't be that guy. She reads the email. Uh yeah, read some stuff talk that sounds like it's mail time. Welcome, you've got mail.

You can always email us at the Brooklyn Boys Podcast at gmail dot com. Also on our Facebook page. This This one came from the Facebook page right to the email from Anthony Hopkins. Say, Hey guys, Fava bean, I hope you guys had a great Christmas, Hanukah and New Year. Slice for Life and Truck Driver started from episode zero and now I'm on my second, almost third full run through of this podcast. Gotta say it absolutely gets me

through my long ast days. Coming to New York for a long weekend in a few weeks with my fiance, I was hoping you guys could recommend some fantastic places to eat. We're staying near Homeboken, but we are obviously venturing into the city. We are both adventurous eaters, from raw sushi to the traditional steakhouse for the benefit of skiing. We are looking to stay in the two dollar signed price range. That's more Brodie's not mine. Um, all right,

so I'm gonna email him back with some suggestions. I guess make sure to send me an invisible shirt. Don't forget to ruin it. We'll invisibly ruin it. Invisible not a problem. Jacob wrote to us with free dessert proposed to my girlfriend on December seventeenth, says Jacob barn Heart congratulations with a family ring. It was my mom's, so we needed to switch the diamond to a new ring that fit her finger. We went to the jewelry store and they said it would be ready on jan the

side of the ring pot, not the diamond pot. Called on the fifth, they said it's not ready yet. Check back on the eighth. We came back on the eighth and they fucked up the ring size. On the receipt. It had the correct size, but they put the dime. They put the diamond on the wrong ring. Oh God told us we'd have to wait another week or so to get it on the right ring. We paid a hundred dollars to get it done. What should we do? This is a free they're asking what you should do.

We feel like there should be some sort of competition for making us wait longer than it should have. First of all, the hundred another week. Hold on, by the way, all right, So there you go. The hundred dollars is coming off right away. You're free on the hundred. You're not paying for it because they sucked it up. But now how can they help? Now you gotta get a gift card for the place for the store another hundred off to buy on your next purchase because you had

to wait to two weeks whatever it was. I can't do that. I wasn't playing attention on the diming. But you how do? He didn't get it when you wanted it, so you shouldn't have to pay for it. And now if they want to keep your business so free is even? Is not even? Now? All you have the free desert another hundred bucks? All right? Well, Jason Curley has a free dessert dobe not cash but gift card. Um. A friend of mine was so excited to tell me his free dessert story. I tell him the time. I told

him all the time, even is not even? And how I got free dessert? So he told me he went to a bumper and ice bumper car event. Looks cool ice bumper car like they Oh I thought that would bumper cars made of ice? They're on the ice? Did they have one? Looks cool? But I have never done it with Manhattan with his family and was assured everyone would ride the cars together. Well, they didn't get everyone

on the ride at once. He said this is unacceptable and got free passes to go ice skating whatever he wants. Damn right. He was so excited to tell me this, so I told him Brookly Boys Podcast, you have to listen to get better at it and don't be afraid to get what you are owed. Hashtag we good ah by the way, I have a good picture put on Instagram this week, Paul Hicky wants us to know that

I've been listening. I've really listened to episodes zero to two over the holidays, waiting for episode one eleven this coming week. Twenty one have been played on my phone at least five times each of the last couple of years. They are just too damn good down. We don't get credit for it, but thank you. We love you. Listen to them live, Yeah, that would be nice. Um. Okay, here we go Joey Pete talking about our old friend the Jersey Kid. Here a few ways to the Jersey

Kid audio files. Okay, here are a few ways to listen to the Jersey Kid. One cut the chord on your beats by Dre Headphones. Not a sponsor to skip thirty thirty times three smash your phone with an anvil from acme. I'm not a sponsor. That's a that's a road Runner reference. I want every credit I have given you guys. With him on it back, I would rather fall down a well a well over hearing him again on here. I'm finally caught up. Love what you're doing.

That's tweet me his handle on Twitter at Jersey Kid. Okay, that's right, we love the Jersey Kid. I actually missed this guy, and I wish you'd come in here and pay us a visit. I know you you don't feel that way. I love the Jersey at a distance. You know what, he has his own show now here. He doesn't need to slum and hang out on the podcast. He's got his own show. He's he's you know with Greg. Take all right, So I got some stuff here. First of all, this picture was in my folder for this episode,

so it's not an email, but it's a reminder. I put this on Instagram at David Brody. But I saw a really good movie on Netflix with um Ryan Reynolds called six Underground. Really good movie and I loved it. I was tweeting about it. In the middle of the movie. It's like Deadpool sense of humor, but it's like an espionage Actually, the twenty minute car scene at the beginning fantastic, really good movie. Then at the end of the movie they show a sky line of Manhattan, our city, our

beautiful city. Now, if you remember, nine eleven happened and the twin towers were taken down and there was a big hole in the skyline with those of us who lived here, there was a spot by the Brooklyn Bridge where the tall buildings were gone. Yeah, and then about seven or eight years ago they started building World Trade Tower One, not called the Freedom Tower, by the way. That also pisces me off. And it's a beautiful building.

We did our broadcast on there. It's the tallest building in North America, largest building in in the Northern Hemisphere, I believe, uh and and uh. But more importantly, it's the largest building, tallest building in America. In America. They show a scene of a skyline of Manhattan from a helicopter where there's no World Trade Tower One, which means it's about ten year old. Footage in a brand new movie on Netflix. Shame on you. You gotta use you

gotta get some new aerial shots. I mean, what does it take? How how hard is it to take a picture of Manhattan from the past? Eight is when there's a building standing there? All right, So let's see Brie. Lynn underscore b r I I underscore Lynn. That's a lot of underscores. She spotted Peter Mullar Marshall's in Arizona. Okay, uhh, this is uh it's Mona Beach, she wrote. Nordstrom Christmas gift package never arrived. I called. I learned it was

somehow canceled and no one ever told me. Unfortunate, but I got a hundred Allar gift cards, free dessert. Excited to share you. You are the master. I'm officially sharing my degree with you to make you an honorary attorney. So she's giving me her law degrees. I was excited about that. Um unjust swine. How much free dessert should I go after? When my son opens his fitbit versa box uh from a department store on Christmas and it's empty, Hash takes lives for life, I said, what the fuck?

Twenty dollars for your son? Being disappointed and twenty five dollars for having to go back to the store or wait for shipping, whichever you had to do. If it's makes longer than two days and you can prove it was empty, get more credit. So he wrote back, thanks for the advice. Uh, we're reading the verdict. I pulled out here's what you're gonna do for me? And I did get a new fitbit and fifty in in in

merchandise credit at the Star Free Desert Slice for Life. UM, I'm gonna read this one next week, and I have one more from Kenneth p. E V. A y new listener here. Guys, my name is Ken listen to your podcast. Started listening in early December. I love the chemistry you guys have together. I belly laugh at least once on every episode listened backwards from present day to one hundred Brodie calm Down. Today. I went back to episode one, and I have to say I was apprehensive that it

would not be as good as they are now. Since all things evolve over time and continue to get better, I was pleasantly surprised and loved it. I will continue to listen to new episodes when they come out. However, I will fill in starting from the beginning in order. I love the rants and the banta between you. Keep up the great entertainment. Ken from Western Massachusetts, Thank you, Ken.

Please make sure you check out at David Brody. I posted two girls protesting, two girls, two girls protesting at at the Climate Change March whether they were having their school gave them permission to skip school to march in the climate change right convenient? And one of them held up a sign why go to school for a future that doesn't exist? That's poignant, right, except doesn't wrong? She spelled doesn't wrong, Okay, And then you talked about what

was the name of that Twitter account? So there's a Twitter account called Terrorizing Brody with pictures of Kale and they just girl keep fucking sending them, keep sending them. And I want to thank everyone for commenting on my PC that was updating on the night I had to come back to work. Uh. And then this is the last thing I want to read from Alicia Rose, and then I can get into a rand if you want. She says, this reminds me of the podcast she tweeted

both of us, and it's a it's a meme. It says, I'm telling you a story, be prepared to have seven mini conversations and nineteen other stories thrown into it because I can't stay focused. Sounds like us in a nutshell. So you got anything else? Because I want to talk about what I mean. I'm good for now. I'm gonna wrap this up. I'll tell you what happened to me.

It's Star Wars the Rise of Skywalker, no spoilers. Went to the movies and uh with my wife and the kids and my uh, my youngest likes to collect the metal buckets of popcorn. They have different souvenir ones at the Marvel movies, the Star Wars movies, and so we got the large popcorn and a soda with our stubs rewards card. Not a sponsor, it was an AMC event. She got the large popcorn in the Star Wars tin tin bucket at the end of the At the middle of the movie, she looks over me and says, hey,

my bucket has a dent in at the top. It had like a pinch so it was sharp dented. I said, well, uh, she was. I just want you know it was like that when I got it. I just I noticed it. Now when I turned the bucket around. It's dented. I said, I. Well, after the movie, I said, after the movie, we'll go and we'll take care of it, no problem. So after the movie I go up to the concession stand very nicely, and I said, excuse me, we bought the popcorn and

the very expensive souvenir tin. Uh, it's got a dent in it. Can you just give me another one? There's stacks of them? He says, Um, yeah, I gotta talk to my manager all right back, What are you fucking kidding me? So I go, what were you go? What? And he walks away. So he goes around the back, out the out the big kiosk thing he's in, goes past the red velvet ropes, and he goes over to a little counter in the front by customer service. Blah blah, looks we guess, did you also have to ask his

manager to take a ship? Yeah? So he comes back and he says, uh, yeah, I can't help you. Some ship is just common sense, right, get the kid of fucking right. So I so I go, what do you mean? Yeah? I go, what do you mean you helped me? He says, um, my manager. My manager says, there's no way to verify that you didn't dent to can Here's there's no there's no video, there's no way to approved that it was wasn't already dented that, there was no way to prove it that you didn't dent it. So I said, no,

wait a minute, you have videos showing me denting it. No, you do not, I said, I'm an adult. This tin is worth a dollar, but my kid likes to collect them, and it's sharp because it's dented. You think I got nothing better to do? He says, well, uh, you could

talk to my manager. And it's not like you were trying to take a second one from them, right, I said, to give them the dented one, right, So I said yeah, I said, so we're all these hundreds of stacks of popcorn tents now it's they could be a number one movie this weekend. I'm sure you have a million tins. If you dented it, you just damage it out. I didn't dent it, you dinged it. You gave it my kid.

She didn't notice the ding. I said, for all I know, you could have turned it as you handed it to her, so she wouldn't see the dent on the opposite side. How do I know you didn't do that. Well, you have to talk to the manage. Driving around, So I go to the manager. I went online. Excuse me, sir, can help you, he says. He says, I'm at the manager. I get the manager for you. Okay, no problem. Manager

comes over here. That's manager comes over and I said, excuse me, did the gentleman behind the counter explain to you the bucket situation with my dented bucket? Yes, he did. I'd like a new bucket. Well, sir, there's no way that we can verify. I go, I just paid like nineteen dollars a ticket for three d for the five of us, and I bought popcorn and soda. Right, that's all for a hundred dollars in your movie theater. You think I'm gonna waste all this time on a pop

on a dented popcorn tin. If we dented it were so, I said, if I attented it myself, he says, well, sir, I don't give me the whole We have no way to verify it. I would like a new boy. Here's what you can do for me, I said, because I've waited for you but ten minutes over there, while he walked around, and I came back with his stupid answer. Then I had to wait for you. I wasted on.

I say, here's what you're gonna do for me? I said, You're gonna get me another bucket, right, and you're gonna fill it with popcorn and bring it to me for my troubles, because I've got like a little popcorn left in his tin, and you're gonna apologize to me. Or I could call the corporate office and explain to them how you don't want to give me a bucket to replace the bucket you gave me that was shop like kid could cut a finger open. I wasn't yelling, but

I got to the point with him. So he says, all right, wait here a minute, I go, do you have a manager? Where are you going? Hold on? So I'm human. Now. My family is still over by the counter on the other side of the ropes. They don't know what's going on. So he comes back and he goes, he goes to have a good night, gives me my bucket a popcorn. Hold on. So then Mike, I walk Now, my kids haven't seen any of this, so I wave him over, come over, and then and they said what happened.

I said, the manager said I can't have a new bucket, and my daughter's face doesn't get upset. She looks at me, goes and and I go. The force is strong with me. Here's your bucket and popcorn. Boom. Fuck you manage a guy. I shouldn't have to beg for a one dollar tin when I spent a hundred dollars. The other thing is this goes back to the customer service person that you you were first confronted with, the person who was there behind the counter. You can make a fucking decision by

the own. His name was Tim. I don't mind saying it. Fuck you Tim. So I got the bucket and the popcorn. How did he take for Tim? Does he cannot think on his own? Does he need to go run for a manager? Is he gonna go out of business? No? Tim was the manager. So the guy before kids should have been solved. What I'm saying is, why are people that was hector Tim? Hector for not having a brain in your ship. I can't do that. All you hadna do is give me a bucket and then tell the

manager this one's dented. No one's gonna No one's gonna ask. My point is I had to pull out to here's what you're gonna do for me? God, to get the damn popcorn because he didn't have the balls to look at me in the eye and say I'm not gonna do that. I said, my fourteen year old daughter collects these buckets. That's what I had to do. I'm real, but I did it. Then you should too. Don't take any crap, is what I'm telling you, Brody. I don't know how do you have the fucking patients that you have.

When I tell you what happened next episode at CVS, you'll you'll ask that same question. Big time problem and it only seems to come back to see the episodes. Yeah, we're talking on this podcast because we're from Brooklyn. Boys Boys