Mashonda Talks "Positive Distraction", Returning To Music, Reseting Energy + More

the morning always. Ye, well this morning, um, I think the first the first thing I said to myself when I woke up was it's going to be a beautiful day, okay. And you feel great absolutely, even with the rain and everything. And I love the rain because living in San Diego now we don't get any rain. Why San Diego. It's just gorgeous. I know. But like, what was the connection? Because you know, we live here. I've lived here my

whole life. Um, twenty twenty happened. My grandmother who raised me, one of the closest people in my life, passed away in twenty twenty and yeah, and she was the main reason why I stayed here so long, because I was taking care of her. My son's father moved out to San Diego in twenty nineteen and he struggled. My son struggled with it a lot, and I right though, you know, he lost that connection. It was a weekly thing. So I haven't wanting to move to LA for years, but

I stayed because of my grandmother. And when everything happened, I went out to San Diego, spent a month and fell in love. I was like, I don't want to live in LA. I'm gonna live here. It's like nature everywhere, and it ended up working out. Yeah, reignited your love for music too. Yeah, Okay, I definitely think that had that setting had a lot to do with it, you know, really emerging back into it, and your son had a lot to do with it also, a hundred percent influence

on everything. So totally, can you tell us why you've put out an EP? It's been how long since your last God January Joy came out in two thousand and five. Jesus Christ seventeen years later. So it wasn't I know you did. It wasn't that you didn't had a lack of love for music. Wasn't the industry more than industry? Right? Absolutely? The industry. Um, you know, I felt a little misplaced and a little unwelcomed, and you know, even blackballed, would you say, goes up? Yeah, a little bit. You know,

I heard things here and there. People felt like they had to choose sides. I still feel like a lot of people do feel that way, and I get it, you know, I know people never got that though, yeah oh yeah, well yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. That must have been on them because I've never felt like, well I never thought that. I've never felt that from me that club at all. But you'd be surprised, totally, totally,

and um, you know, it was a little discouraging. And as much as I love music, I've been doing music way before I met my ex, you know. So it was me and my son came in the room and last year in November and he said, my your viral on TikTok and I was like, what does that mean? You know, and uh, you know what's going on? Pretty much, I've been in a bubble. I was never on TikTok until he told me this. Somebody said up here and said, you're Charlomagne, you're your your sound on TikTok. Your sounds

going what are you talking about? Right? And it was a record that I did in two thousand and three, a freestyle I did over a Bust to Rhymes joint, The Honey I See you had like millions and millions and millions of interactions worldwide, and I was like, Okay, well maybe this is a sign. No, maybe I need to really get back into it, especially now that this generation knows my voice. So um, I did just that, you know, And I created a body of work that I love and it's art. You know, It's not a

traditional album. It's it's from beginning to end a story and love and my transformation. I don't always use the word healing because I feel like it's more of a transformation, um, and just the ups and downs of love. And you did some visuals with it, a lot of energy with the interacting with you when you're a main leading man. Yes,

because I wanted to. I wanted to create a visual that was refreshing compared to what's happening now in visuals where it's you know, I don't feel like I don't feel like we're showing love and romance and what that looks like anymore. I feel like it's almost like a dying art. People even know what that it is anymore. This is what I'm saying. So I wanted to take it back to what that looks like, like having an argument with the person you're in love with, but then

coming back together, not canceling him, you know. So that's what Complicated is all about. Pick the beats and help you produce, and not at all. He want nothing to do with it. You know, he has his own genre of music. No, you know, he's like, when I do make something that he can relate to, he's like, yeah, this one's good. Otherwise to him, it's like old people music, you know him, and he loves it. Okay, he loves it. Yeah, what is the God's plan affirmation? So the God's plan affirmation?

My grandmother always used to say, put everything in God's hands. So at the end, um, that's what I say. I said, it's God's plan and It's in God's hands. And that one starts with waking up and blessing the day, and I say, I want to start. I want to start my blessing. I want to thank my day with you. So I'm speaking to the person listening. I want to count my blessings starting with you. So that's to let

you know you are a blessing, right. So it's interactive the music and the affirmations because I want people to really I feel like our culture sometimes we have a hard time understanding how to even get into meditating. I have a lot of people ask me, well, how do you meditate? What is an affirmation? So I wanted to incorporate that into the EP, just to give people a small idea of how to get started. And I did

it over a very relatable kind of deed. So you work with a lot of people in this industry, did you reach out to any of them during this project? And some of them say, now, I'm not effort with you as everybody can with open arms. I didn't want to work with anyone in the industry, so I worked with two new young producers, Lenicia Nelson, who's an amazing vocalist and songwriter, engineer, and Quan Keys, who is a sick producer. He's a church guy. And I wanted to

work with new, fresh, you know, undiscovered talent. I don't really want to put anybody in a situation where it was like, all right, let me make sure it's okay,

you know, so I just did my own thing. That probably helps to create a trauma free album too, absolutely, because you're not bringing no old triggers and you know certain things like you know, I like the song Runaway, Yes, And the story behind that song in particular, I think is interesting because it can be such a relief when you're like in a bad situation and you get out

of it. Baby, it is freedom, right, it's runaway. Runaway is just about walking away from a situation before it gets out of hand, like knowing when to respect the red flags, you know, And I think sometimes we prolong things that don't feel good because we're comfortable in there. Or someone said, you know, the sex might be good and we don't want to part ways with that. Why did you say? Someone said, because when we had have you ever stayed with somebody too long because the sex

is great? Noo quick? That's never been Like, what is the leading factor? What is the red flags? For Maschanda? Red flags for me now are definitely communication, you know, if we can't be transparent and consistency. I love consistency. So it's like those two things have so much to do with like your foundation and what's what's what it's leading up to UM, so I look out for that.

Dating is interesting. Dating can be ghetto ghetto, you know, if you're thinking McDonald's thinking about dating, you know versus mister Chowers when the friends are good and had exactly mean ghetto. You know. I just feel like people get into these interactions and relationships and they're not emotionally ready, not mentally ready, and then they just come in with all their stuff and kind of like project onto you.

And it's like, this is not what I signed up for. UM. And you know, a lot of younger guys have been coming my way and I'm like, I don't know if we can, if we can said that too when she was up here last Yeah, and they're so like bold and intense about it, like met you in person both. Do you like the boldness? I like, yeah, I do like when you know people know what they want and they are showing you that they're very serious about it. But it's just interesting because I'm just it. But these

younger guys do. They are pretty more, pretty mature compared to I guess ten years ago what a younger guy was. UM. But it's been interesting because at first I was like, well, what do we have, what do we even have in common? What are we going to talk about? But I don't know. You know, I don't want to say that I would never date. And when I say younger, I'm talking like twenty eight to thirty one. Okay, it's pretty young. What's the wildest date you've been on that a younger man

is taking you on? What did y'all go? What did y'all do? I I can't even think. I want to know the ghetto one that you said ghettocause something popped in your mind when you said ghetto. McDonald lake that ghetto, especially if you high as hell and y'all leave y'all y'all coming back from somewhere and get them hot fries late at night. I'm not talking about ghetto in a sense of form, like physical ghetto. I'm talking about like the interaction itself, you know. But people don't call anymore.

Sometimes they just only text you, or they FaceTime you with no notice. I don't like that, fatime. I don't do it. Yeah, I don't really answer. We have to we have to plan a FaceTime, like, hey, are you busy? Is it okay? Here to FaceTime? Right? Right? Well? What did you feel what did you feel you needed to tell yourself when you name the album note this Self. So, I'm the type of person I'm always if something comes to mind, I'm always writing it down, doing voice notes.

I'm journaling um and I think and I've noticed that when I don't do that, I forget what that moment of like oh wow. So I think everybody should start writing things down, those those moments where you like connect the dots in your head like that happens because of this. You know, it's always like something in the past that kind of triggers something in the present. So for me, Note to Self is really it's an accounting. It's a document of everything that I've I feel like I've survived

and made it through. And it not only survived and made it through, but I'm able to take the lessons from it. You know, I haven't forgotten the lessons. Let's talk about this song positive distraction for a second, because sometimes you're like, Okay, you know, there's a lot going on and I just need something to make me feel good and feel happy. Are you okay with dating somebody who you know maybe there's no future with, but they

are a positive distraction? Yeah, definitely, definitely. I feel like everybody needs that. But that's also a conversation. You don't want to lead somebody on. You know. It's like we come together, we have a good time, and then it's okay, we can part ways and pick up right where we left off from the last time. Yeah, you're doing this all on your own. This album is independent or super independent, produce, direct your own videos, everything. So what makes this successful

to you? What's what's in a success The fact that it's done and out, the fact that I did it, you know, the fact that I worked, put my money into it. I didn't ask anybody for anything. I paid everybody that helped me. I don't owe anybody any money, gay right. I feel like I also created opportunities for creatives to come in and show what they can do, even the artwork, down to the artwork, down to every font,

you know, all the small details. It feels really good to to create a body of work and then release it and know that you pretty much did it on your own. One thing I always give you credit for it is artwork, Like as far as you care, rating these art shows, helping these young artists, but also helping people get their collection up because Massonda send me like pictures like this would be great for you or this artist.

She's a young black girl from Brooklyn, and I think you should get this piece of work because she really wants to sell it to somebody that you know, somebody like you. And so she does always hit me up about things like that. And so can you talk about your love of art because this is something you were doing for a long time. I remember you had did the book release. I think it was the book release at Donna Carn's place, Donna Carren's house. It was amazing

by the way. I was like, what is this? But even just being into artwork, where did that come from? I've been a collector for the past twenty five years. That sounds old as though, but I've always collected art and I've always supported artists. So it's just a part of who I am. But I started Art Leader in twenty sixteen because I wanted to create a platform to give women an art more of an opportunity to show

their work and to sell their work. So I do exhibition curate you know, galleries, and I'm getting ready to do a couple of museum shows. And for me, it's all about having people of color collect people of color, you know. So when I connect Angela with an artist, an emerging artist that I know is doing what they need to do to take their career to the next level, I know that I'm not only helping Angela, but I'm also helping the artists. And music and art, you know,

it collides. It's it's pretty much the industries are almost alike, and the artists they need the same kind of support as musicians do. For people who want to collect art, how do you determine? Because people always ask me that, like if they come to my house and they see what I have and they're like, what made you decide to buy that? And for me, it's just a feeling that I get if I see something, if it evokes any type of emotion in me, if it makes me

think of something, if I think it's just beautiful. What for you would you tell people who want to start collecting art, how do they go about getting their collection going? I think the first thing is to make sure you buy art that you if you have children, that you want your children to grow up looking at, you know, and something that that's gonna that's gonna because it becomes a part of your psyche. Like you you wake up, you see it, you go to sleep, you see it.

So make sure that you love what you're looking at. Don't just get into it for an investment, even though it can be a great investment. But definitely buy work that you love. And I think that's what you're so you're so good at How can you tell me some things that a good investment? People ask me that all the time too, because I'm like, I don't really know. No, you just buy art because you love it, which is great,

you're like a real collector. But the I mean, once you're involved in the marketplace and you it's like stocks and bonds, right, you check the market. You can see what art is going up, what's selling it auction um, the price points, who's in museums, who who's with a good gallery. These are all ways that you can tell if an artist is going to be a quote unquote good investment. Let's go back to your other art of music, because you said this album is described as a healthy,

realistic outlook on relationships. But then this first thing is called complicated because that's real life, so complicated relationships can be healthy, Yes, okay, because you got to learn from it. The thing is a relationship that's not complicated, right, Every human relationship, relationships with self is complic human and complicated. Yea, so comic Tackling that conversation is super healthy. Have you seen the video I'm not Oh? Is that the one

where you and the guy all over each other? There are moments where we're fighting, but that's like for me, that video is the perfect example of a complicated relationship. How do you argue? I always think it's important in relationships that because you are at times not going to get along, and I do feel like your style of arguing and how you guys communicate during that time is important.

How do I argue, I'm not. Do I sound like ill? No, I'm more like However, I argue it works because I and I don't want to say firm down, super firm. I don't shut down because I do believe in communication. Um, but I do have a way of checking people. You're laughing, what are you laughing? On your mind? I'm laughing because I'm thinking of reactions. And I do have a good because I pay close attention to everything, every detail. I'm paying attention to you when you don't even think I am.

So when when it gets to the point of arguing, I'm gonna call you out on things that you did not think. So you're an attorney pretty much, so January ninth, I'm going to call you out on things that you had no idea I even paid attention to because I didn't say shit about it before. Is that healthy though? Because how to bring things up? And you're like, why didn't you bring it up when it happened? Because sometimes

because sometimes it's not because you know why. I don't ever want to be that person that's coming across as the mother or the corrector or a judge. So I'm not going to correct a grown person every time I see them doing something that I don't agree with. I don't.

I don't think that's healthy because that's not my child, you know so, But I I'm gonna pay attention Like those are the red flags we'll bother you the most in a relationship with whether you're dating somebody but you something that you can't stand, whether it's I don't know time or is it you said, lack of consistency, lack

of communication, lack of consistency. I think a very annoying thing is um when people play around with my time, like if like if we like, if you say a certain time, you know, it really irritates me, not only from dating, not man, just in general, Like if we have a nine am meeting, don't hit me at nine forty five and say, oh I can't make it. You knew you couldn't make it, probably at eight forty five.

You played already, right you you knew you couldn't make it at eight probably, So that those type of things, I agree with that because I always feel like latenist is really a disrespect to the other person because in certain times not important. Yeah, and that's how I look at it. I remember I dated this guy and what I did to him, and he never was late again after this because he would always be late. And so what I did was the next time that we were

going out, I just went and did something else. And then when he called me like thirty forty minute, I was like, oh, I didn't think you were coming, right, and because you weren't here, so I left and he was never late again after that. Yeah. Time is very important. Absolutely. Time is like one of the most important things, especially when you're a parent, because you plan everything, So I

think that, yeah, be considerate. What made you focus on the last five years as opposed to like your whole life of dating experiences as far as the EP, Yeah, it wasn't only I'd say it was more so the last ten years. Well, because coming out of a marriage, you know, I had to give myself time to really get ready for dating. You know, I didn't want to jump into anything. So once I hit the road, I was like, Okay, I'm in it. Let's see, let's see

what people are doing out here. At first, I don't think I was conscious enough to to really pay attention. I was just having fun. Yeah, And how was that? Is everything? Dating somebody else? When you have in X, right, do they always look at your ex like it's insane and it's ridiculous And it's been a very large it's been a huge hindrance and in a complication, Yes, I could imagine it's annoying. Um, if your ex worked at McDonald's, I'm sure to be a lot it would be so

much easier. It'd be so much easier. Um. But some guys are a little intimidated and insecure, and some guys act like they're not. But they are, and then once in a while you'll meet a guy who really does not care, who doesn't even really know who the person is. And those are the ones. Those you know, those are the ones that I like, Yeah, those are the ones who who were just like who And I'm like, yeah, we're gonna have fun. You open a marriage again. You know,

marriage can be great. But I think I did it, and I'm good on that, um verbatim. I did it. It's good when it's good. But I don't know if I believe anymore. And no offense to the people that are married, same thing. Really, I just you know, I don't know if I should even say this, but I just feel like as humans, individual souls on a spiritual level, that what marriage means to a lot of people kind

of stunts growth individually as a person. Because if you're married to someone that's on the same level with you with this, then it's perfect. But if you're married to someone that doesn't think that you need to be somewhat interactive with another human at some point. Oh so you're basically saying you don't believe in monogamy. Absolutely, I do. She said no, no, no no, no, no, no, no, no, interact, yes,

interact in a nice way. No no, yes, yes, like just having a conver like for instance, okay, here's a perfect example. And I thought this was so dope. I recently went to Qatar and not knowing anyone, but wanting to do things. My friend connected me with his friend who was a married man, but who's also like super cultural, like he knows what to do, where to go. He literally picked me up. We connected on what'sapp. He picked me up, he took me to everywhere I wanted to go.

He spent the day together, did all these things like restaurants, malls, all the stuff. And then he introduced me to his wife, and his wife was super cool. I was like, thank you so much for letting me borrow your husband. It was dope. I don't think a lot of people are prepared to understand really that dynamic, that human, that very necessary human interaction. What do you think would Gia be okay with that envy for you having a tour guy guy for being a tour guy for a woman that

he's never met before. I put myself in that predicament. But so no, unless unless I knew the person, Like if I know the person personally, then majority of my friends. What if it's somebody that I don't know and just flying in see not zoon Ye. Yeah, that's different, you know what I mean? And it was different. I was even I was even like, wow, okay, let me that's hilarious. Oh my god. Would you be okay with that with

somebody you were dating? If he It would have to be because if that person you though, he was hitting his wife the whole time, And I would want to be in a situation with someone that I trust enough to go do that. Absolutely, you could trust somebody that much that like, is it hard for you to trust? No? Because I mean, well, he wouldn't say anyway, right, he didn't try to holland no, no, no, no no. But people have teld me that men and women can't be friends.

And I have great male friends and some people. I'm also not throwing myself and giving sexual energy to these people. You know, like I didn't give him any sexual energy. It was like I knew he was married and was like I wasn't. I wasn't. I didn't look at him that way, right, you know, and thank you for helping him, right. And some people also feel like they don't want to make new friends either, because I've heard that a million times.

It's so problematic. That's a random new person culture stuff. It's like, no new friends, and how are you gonna grow right? You know, how are you gonna evolved? Sometimes for friends you might like better than your old friends who you obligated to be friends with. The guy that picked you up, I mean he has to be you're still thinking about no, because if it's like if a family member called and said, hey, I have a friend

coming in town, that means that person means something to you. Yes, So that means that that, yes, I would go pick them up and do something. Because other than that, I'm trying to think if if I would pick somebody up that I didn't know, but I would only do that if a close friend said he my sister absolutely out for her, or if this is by someone so so yeah, I can see that happening, but his wife still didn't

have to agree. You know that's true? Could you? Could you deal with a man right now that hasn't done any work on himself, like, never done the therapy, not on no journey of healing. Nothing. I don't have the time or the energy. I have one son. Yeah, you think you've been in love again? Yeah? M hmm yeah, look at a blushing now seem like even for me now? And love is also very different you know. Um, well you have a new definition of it. Yeah, okay, what is it? Yeah? Um, I think in love is kind

of like a infatuation. It's very temperate, It's it's a it's a I don't want to say temporary. Some people do say they're like being married for years and they're still in love. But I do kind of think that it's um, it could be selfish, it could be very um what's the word um? Conditional in love? Like what happens if that person does something that doesn't make you so happy? Are you still in love with them? You know?

So for me it's like I when I get into these relationships and and the love starts coming into play, it's always about will I be able to be okay with you even if you do something that I can't stand, you know, like I love my son if he does something I don't like, I'm still gonna love my son. Am I gonna look at you that way? Can we get through that? So for me, that is more important than being in love. Could you date somebody in the industry again, I wouldn't want to. I haven't why not?

Mm hmm, I know why not hurt, but you wouldn't rule it out, he said, you don't know why not because you just know why not. And I mean, I'm this could apply to everyone in this room because we are industry people. Um. I just think that we are jaded in a way. UM, we've been over exposed. Um a lot of our purity has been tainted. So but that's not just this industry. That's in life. I feel like music industries or music industry so different, and people

change as they get older too. I feel like there's a time when, yeah, everybody's going wild, and then everybody calms down. That's where everybody in therapy now. It seems like maybe, like you know, some forbidden fruit wouldn't be bad. I'm okay with that. But it's like like you said, though, the person just really has to be aware. I think we're all aware of our things. It also has a change too. You know, you think about when we all came up together, right, it was a wild time, that's

what we seem. There was nothing showing us the other side. Yeah, now that's starting to change. You're starting to see that more, you know, which is a way better thing. You know, true, But yeah, I don't know. It's just something about the whole even the word music industry. It's like, I don't think I want to anybody in the music industry. Even I just said the song forbidden Fruit, Now I read that part of that is also somebody told you you taste like a sweet fruit? Is that true or false?

You know everything that I write about is true? Okay? Yeah? Where fruit was it? Don't give about your secrets. That's a whole other book. I will. I know it is a whole other book, and I actually wanted to do a whole little thing on it. But I will book on forbidden fruit. Know about self care, about how to take care of yourself, and you know how to how to how to taste good? You know? Um yeah, yeah, but lip service I figured that. Yeah, it was so much fun. You want to play, but you want to

play complicated? Complicated. She by the way, first time directing a video, yes, so that's huge to make sure after you hear the song, go look at the video too, if you haven't already. I love it. I didn't want to ask one more question about purity though, like what is purity? Because I don't feel like anybody can be pure. I don't think no human on this planet could ever be pures. What is purity to you? I think pure? Well, I know purity for me is, like I said, loving

someone unconditionally, not expecting. I'm just really taking them for who they are. Um, not coming down on them every time they do something that irritates you, but but learning how to manage yourself, you know, checking yourself, why does this irritate me? Um? And when you exchange energy with someone on that level, that's pure and it's rare real. All right, ladies and gentlemen, if you're late, she's going to be pure and not come down on you. My god, it's the breakfast cloud. Good morning,