Hey guys, Sunday Sampler Time. Some clips from some of the podcasts this week on the Nashville Podcast Network. Coming Up, I talked with Don Felder, who was in the Eagles, and he talks about the story behind Hotel California, which he wrote. But we're gonna start with a clip from Take This Personally, where Morgan talked with therapist doctor Amy Tran about childhood trauma and how it impacts us as adults. They also discuss things we should unlearn in our lives.
So here is a clip from Take This Personally with Morgan Heughlsman.
Personallysman, I'm excited to welcome Amy Tran, who is a therapist and currently completely her training to be a psychologist in Canada.
How are you doing today?
Thank you, I'm doing great. Thanks for having me on the show.
Do you find it difficult for people to kind of address that because they are still as an adult. I'm super close with my parents. I'm not looking back and finding anything, but I'm sure there is something there. Do you find it's harder to do that when there is a close relationship because you almost don't want to jeopardize it, or you don't want to lose it. Do you find that people find it hard to kind of attack that place because it's such a personal moment of their life.
Oh yeah, one hundred percent. People say all the time, oh, but I love my parents, or but I know they did a good job. So it's really holding that space for the person to be like, Okay, I love my parents, and I know they did the best that they could, but there's some things in which maybe it was outside of their awareness and they reacted to situations a certain
way that had long lasting impacts on us. So, I mean, my perspective of it, and what I invite everyone to really see is that most humans are just trying the best that they can with what they know at the time, the resources they have, and I believe parents are doing that too. That is the kind of perspective that I want people to take when we're talking about our parents, is that no, they're not maliciously trying to traumatize you
or create anxiety and depression in your life. They were just doing their best that they could and then this is how it turned out. So it is tough though for some people to talk about it.
How can you give them tips to be like, you're not going to be perfect, but this is what you can do. Is there things that parents can do to ensure their kids at least grow up in a sense that have an idea of what's happening around them and how to address those situations as they get older.
I think that first of all is to be compassionate towards yourself. Right to parent is not only just ensuring survival and that there's food on the table and that the kid is living in an enriched life, but it's a lot to help a child label their emotions, work
through their emotions. There is so much work involved in that because if you, as a parent are not comfortable with emotions, if you, as a parent don't know how to handle your own emotions or soothe yourself, it's going to be really hard for you to do that for your child and model that for your child. So that's why it comes back to parents are just doing the best that they can. Be compassionate with yourself. Remember that
it's a learning process. And if I can invite the parents out there who are listening to think about two things safety. How can you make your child feel safe if you think about your child as not just a human being but a nervous system as well, that will react to a loud voice, that will react to an angry face, and will react to conflict around the home. How can we make them feel a little bit safe? And also is that all children want to feel validated?
Seen in her If they're crying and you think what they're crying about is the silliest thing before jumping to well is it really worth crying about? Knowledge that you understand where that sadness is coming from. Validate, validate, validate, validate, is what I have to say. So how can we create safety for children? And how can we make sure that they feel validated? Even if you disagree. First, just let your child know that you understand where they're coming from.
And I think as humans everybody can feel that sense of validation that we all want. That's something that we just keep having throughout our lives.
It never goes away.
So Christ Appleton's a decent friend of mine, and his song gets covered all the time. A lot of a songs do like Tennessee Whiskey, which is not his song, but one that he covered and repopular and gets covered all the time. Are people constantly wanting you to hear covers of your songs, like don't listen to this? Does that happen a lot where it's like listen to this player or not so much anymore.
It happens a lot.
Just if I'm going through Instagram or Facebook or something.
There's all that you're TikTok.
There's people that want to show me that they can play my solo, which is really flattering. You know, it's not an easy solo by any stretch of the imagination, but it is flattering for that many people to try to attempt. There's actually I saw a trombone player doing the solo for Hotel California, and trombonas like this guy is a great player, but I can't imagine a sewer pipe players who playing.
An hotel. So I watched it.
Did you write about like when you wrote that We're on the beach?
Like, where did that come to you?
Like that?
Because it wasn't written as part of the whole song, right, didn't you write the intro to that song just kind of by itself.
What happened was I had rented a house on a beach in Malibu. I had two little kids. One was about a year old and one was like two and a half.
And I was hitting on the couch.
It was just a beautiful sunny California day and the sun was glistening on the surf as it's coming in, and my kids were in the sand on this swing set. And so I have this guitar, acoustic guitar, and I'm just sitting there and I start playing this chord progression, and about three or four times through the progression, I said, I have to go in the back bedroom and record a little bit of it, because if I don't record
it tomorrow, allgo What was that thing that was? So So I run in a back bedroom, cord about I don't know, two or three times through the verse progression, and just put it away. It was actually my one year old daughter's bedroom was my recording studio when she was away playing, I could go in and Mike write demos and stuff. Anyway, So I recorded that, and then we started writing song ideas for the album that was untitled at the time that was going to be Hotel California.
So I wound up writing sixteen or seventeen complete basic tracks where I would go in and take an idea like that little progression, and i'd fill it out and write a chorus part to it, and I'd play bass on it. And I had a little rhythm rhythm drum machine called a rhythm ace that you used to see on piano players and bars that they could set it to a cha chaar, set it to a rock beat.
So I used that, and then I just overdubbed a bunch of stuff on this little four track tape recorder three to one, then fill up two more tracks and about those three to one, and so it was mono at the time. I just I should have brought my laptop because I have a digital copy of it. I could play you a little bit of it, and it sounds I played the beginning with a twelve string and then these electrics come in. The solo at the very end is pretty much like it is on the record,
with the exception of some walshisms. When Joe and I played together, we came up with just great unique stuff. So I put that idea on a cassette with like fifteen or sixteen other song ideas. One became Victim of Love, and Henley liked that one that sounded like a Mexican reggae and so he was off and running writing lyrics to that song and came up with the lyric Idea and lyrics for Hotel California, which was on top of that music bed. So that's kind of how that all came together.
And I didn't want to get you out. I read your book as soon as it came out, like the week it came out. I devoured it, Like I'm a literal fan. I knew the story about the beach. I was like, I don't know, I think it's a beach, but I knew because I as soon as that book came out, I crushed. And it's really one of my favorite like music bio books ever, and I think it represents Again we're just talking about back in your childhood,
like Gainesville, Florida. What was your environment, What were you surrounded by musically in Gainesville that even created an interest to want to hear music that wasn't the typical white music that you got there, Like where was that coming from? Like that desire to learn and be around different kinds of music. There was nothing else to do. There was no internet.
Television had three channels, you know, it's ABC, NBCCBS, and then they went off the air shortly after sunset.
Played the Starspangle by International Anthem. I was telling one of our people here like I caught the tail end of that in my life, and they were like, what the channel would go off? I was like, yeah, and then I would show the screen of his hold.
Yeah.
And there was no really individual entertainment you could do. So I wound up getting a guitar and just trying to figure out how it worked and.
How'd you get the guitar?
What did that?
There was a kid that lived across the street from me, and up in the top of one of his closets I saw in a guitar and it had some broken strings on it. And my brother and I had just come back down from South Carolina and my favorite uncle had given us a box of cherry bombs and we hit him in the trunk from my dad. My dad
wouldn't let us play with those things. So when it would rain, we lived on a dirt road that was crowned and there was a ditch on both sides of the road for all the Florida run off, and to get from the road to your house, there was a big metal culvert that the water would run through underneath
your driveway. So when it was raining, and we would run out with these cherry bombs, light them and throw them up stream and tie them so they would float down into that culvert and then boom, blow up and everybody would come running.
Out to see what was going on, and we would be back in the house hiding.
So this kid comes out, he sees us doing it, and he says, oh, it's some of those cherry bombs. I said, well, I'll give you a handful of these cherry bombs if you can get me that guitar that you have. We'll make a trade. So he runs back to his house, gets his guitar, brings it over, give him cherry bombs. Fifteen minutes later, cherry bombs are gone.
But I got a guitar. We didn't have any money.
That was the only way we could get started.
Good cast up little.
Food for you.
So life ain't.
Oh it's pretty bad. It's pretty beautiful that for a little more, said he can't. You're kicking it with four with Amy Brown.
I saw this thing on Instagram the other day about floor drobes. I had never heard of this before. But if you ever delay putting away clean laundry, or maybe you've tried on that you didn't wear, and then you just start to pile them up like on a chair on the floor for days on end. Well, these piles they have a name, and it's floordrobe. A floor drobe is a place typically on the floor that we leave clean or not quite dirty clothes. And I get all
kinds of ADHD content in my algorithm now. And when floordrobe showed up, I was like, oh my gosh, that is me. And I looked round my room and all my different little floordrobe piles. And I am someone that loves laundry, I really do, But then it turns into floor drobe because I don't think I necessarily love putting the clothes away. Always get distracted, And now I know why. I looked up something real quick just now about floor drobes. And this is from Billy Roberts, a therapist at Focused
Mind ADHD Counseling in Columbus, Ohio. He said, when faced with a task that is boring, the ADHD brand gets overwhelmed and starts craving more interesting tasks. Tedious chores like laundry tend to be particularly frustrating because they can pile up, leading many with ADHD to feel incredibly overwhelmed and to further avoid the task. Now, I'm sure people without ADHD have floor drobes, but I think it's just more common if you have ADHD. And again, I just like knowing
why something is happening. I like knowing also how I can fix it, which leads me to the strategies that I have for you. And these strategies are pretty good. Some maybe you know, some you don't, maybe you just need a refresher. But if you suffer from ADHD paralysis, you definitely will benefit from one of these strategies or maybe all of them. I feel like I might need to implement like a new one each day to get
all my stuff done. And what's fun is there are four strategies, which is very fitting because it's the four things. First thing, break tasks down. You just break them down into smaller, manageable steps. Now this sounds so simple, but trust me, this is something that works. Instead of saying clean the house, we'll break it down to clean the kitchen counter, put away laundry, and just you don't end up with a floor drobe. Maybe put away this pile, put away genes, and then later you can put away
shirts vacuum one room. The idea is to make the task feel less overwhelming. This will really help your brain. I know it's simple, but it helps. It seems very elementary and like you're having to talk to yourself like a child, but when your executive function is out on vacation, it needs a talking to like a child. Second thing,
the Pomodoro technique. Have you heard of this one? I feel like I've talked about it on the podcast before, but it's basically working in short bursts, usually twenty five minutes of folks work, and then that's followed by a five minute break. And what this does is it tricks your brain into thinking like, oh, I only have twenty five minutes of work to do, no big deal. And once you get started, it's easier to keep going. Third thing,
using timer's and external accountability. Sometimes just knowing that someone else is counting on you is enough to get you moving, whether you know it's a friend, a family member, coworker. Having someone check in that can help you break the paralysis. And also with the timer thing, I mean that's back to the Pomodoro effect. Like you could set a timer for twenty five minutes, but you know, we talk about the ten minute pus on the podcast A Lot. I
learned that from my sister. You set a timer for ten minutes and you just clean as much as you can and that ten minutes, try to get as much done as possible. And a lot of times when the timer goes off, you're motivated. You keep going.
You see progress.
Your brain's like, oh this looks good, I might as well keep going, and who knows. You even clean for fifteen minutes, which is better than zero, And when you're an ADHD paralysis, you're getting zero done. Fourth thing, change your environment. If your workspace or home is cluttered or full of distractions, clear it out. Even moving to a different room or a new spot can help reframe your
mind and make it easier to start something. So there you go, break down tasks, Pomodoro technique, use timers, an external accountability, and change your environment. But remember changing environment doesn't have to be anything drastic. It can just be simply getting up and going to another room. It doesn't mean you have to leave your house and go to another location. And something that just popped into my head, that is a strategy that works for me, and I
don't know why. I didn't think of it until now, but it's the body doubling. It actually came up with Kat and I on a Fifth Thing episode recently, so I guess I'll throw it in the fifth Strategy. We'll at it here the Bonus strategy, just like the Bonus episode, but body doubling. That's when you have another person just in the room with you while you're trying to accomplish a task, and the idea behind it working is just
having someone there increases your motivation. It's that simple, and personally, for me, body doubling works really really well. I was researching for this episode and that never came up, but it just popped into my head right now, and I'm glad that it did, because it's just such a good one for me, and maybe it's good for you. And it sounds tricky because you think that body doubling means that the other person has to be doing the same task as you in order for you to be doing it.
But all that you need from your body double is for them to be in the room. If they're helping with the task or doing the same thing, sure that's amazing, but they just have to be in the room.
We're going to do it alive. Oh the one, two, three, Sore Losers?
What up, everybody? I am lunchbox. I know the most about sports, so I'll give you the sports facts, my sports opinions, because I'm pretty much a sports genius, y'all.
It's Sison. I'm from the North. I'm an alpha male. I live on the North side of Nashville with Bayser, my wife. We do have a farm. It's beautiful. A lot of acreage, no animals, a lot of crops. Hopefully soon corn pumpkins, rye. I believe maybe a little fescue to be determined.
Over to you, coach, And here's a clip from this week's episode of The Sore Losers.
Yeah, how much more does this roller coaster got?
I mean, I'm feeling great. I cashed out for you know, I made a thousand on that last roulette. Hitting those numbers. It felt so good. Get on the plane, I'm C twenty seven boarding lucky enough. Got a window and I get my bag and I'm I walk out and I got to get the shuttle to the car. And I see the shuttle pulling away and I'm like, oh no, no, no, no, don't leave. Me, don't leave me and I wave my hand. He stops, not even at the bus stop, lets me on, so I always do VIP and I'm like, hell, yeah,
let's go. We're driving and we passed the turn to my parking lot where I parked, and he pulls into Lot See and I'm like, son, up a bitch, I'm on the wrong bus.
How dude, All you have to do is remember one letter. Ray.
I wasn't paying attention. I saw the bus just pulling away from the stop and I was like, hey, I just don't want to miss it. I don't want to miss it, and I just waved my hand. I got on. So then I'm in. I got two decisions to make. Do I just sit on the bus like an idiot and ride it all the way back to the airport, or do I say, oh, man, there's my stop and get off and just walked a Lot B.
Wonder how close they are? They walkable?
In my head they were walkable.
Ray got it.
So I got off the bus. Ray, it's about a mile. What is happening from Lot Sea to Lot B with a suitcase? With a suitcase eight o'clock at night and there's no damn sidewalks, I'm trudging through bushes, I'm going through the grass. Finally, I put my suitcase in the street and I'm rolling it as I walk on the side in the grass so it can roll. And then I got cars honking at me because I'm blocking traffic with my suitcases.
I walk.
Then I get to a spot where I got to run across four lanes of traffic to get over to the go underneath the bridge exactly where you are, and then you got to go left down underneath the tunnel.
And not only that.
Once I get to Lot B, it's not like I parked in the front of Lot B. I parked in the very back left ass corner. I mean, sweat is just pouring down me as I am making my way, man, And.
That is a moment you'll never forget for the rest, never.
Forget for the rest of my life. And I walk and I finally get to the back and I get in the car and I turn on that ac and I'm like, the trip from Hell is over. The trip from Hell is absolutely over. See.
Some people go to Vegas never make their way out. Man, You're one of the lucky ones.
But the one positive at the airport. I did see, was this chick walk by me?
Right?
And she had her hangers out?
No, she had some hangers and her shirt said blow job queen. And I said, how much? Where were you before I got married? Would you like to meet my friend? Arnold's all I could think. I was like, Hey, who the hell where's that? Like, who advertises? That's unbelieva, it's even allowed.
It's so vulgar.
I'm like, wow. And she's just walking around like it's normal, Like she's smiling and and I'm gonna say this, she wasn't ugly.
So I made a call to my wife.
I said, hey, you know, we had a bad weekend. You know, do you think it would be okay if I.
Oh?
Man, dude, that was great, even though it was a bad rollercoaster. For the most part it was at least one high.
There was finally a little bit we climbed up a little bit, but for the most part it was just an absolute disaster.
Disaster.
Yeah, that's crazy. It was that cold, that cold man. For me, Jenny and wife, nobody could win. It is bad man, but he.
Was his senses, like how did our big boss do he? Who knows? Okay, who knows? How bones do?
Who knows?
I'm always curious that you know, Like, oh, that person ended up winning five K, what that's amazing? Oh h Jenny and Sales, she killed it. She won ten thousand. What do you hear about Sarah? Yeah, she won a corvette. There's always some story. Yeah, or it's like every single person lost.
Yeah, I'm no idea, man, I know my four, my four crew, we lost. There's a blood bath out there.
But I did like that you jumped around to different casinos. You can't lose at the same casino for four straight days. No, Yeah, I got to mix up the joju.
I moved, I moved, I moved, I moved, I moved and didn't damn matter it.
You got to mix up the juju Smith Schuster.
Yeah, all right, Hey, have a great Monday, guys, and listen to what we need tonight. Just to give me some kind I need the Bengals just to win the game. Just win the game, please, I don't care. Just win the game. That's all I need.
Oh is that another bet you played?
No?
No, and just my eliminator, my eliminator.
Cary Lone.
She's a queen and talking so she's getting not afraid to face episode, so just let it flow. No one can do we quiet have a cary Lone. Its sounding carolud.
I know the basics now, like I I know, like even on the voice, I did not know how to do an interview at all. They had to be very very patient with me. I was like, I just I don't know, Like eh, I was just like whatever, I don't even know what to talk about. You're sixteen years old. No, but yeah, once all of that passed, it was I got better, I got in a routine. I was kind
of I was still very very much a teenager. Like I did radio tour and stuff a few times, and that that was that was hard because I they saw me as a teenager. I still very awkward and awkward looking. And by the last radio tour I had grown up a lot. So to prove yourself to you know, radio and just people in the industry at such like vult like just fragile years. So much is changing so much.
I mean, I don't know how you survived. Did you have a mental breakdown ever? Oh yeah, oh yeah.
I but the really mental breakdowns were when I like got older and started to live in relationships and do the music industry at the same time. I'm like, oh my god, I'm about to go crazy because these people I'm dating are not great.
So did you have you had a did you have like one particular toxic relationship, because there's a whole string, like special place in hell for this person. I mean, uh, actually loved that song. I love that one that kind of but I'm sure it was turned out to be bad. Is this all the same person it was?
It was there was a little moment there that was a little interesting.
But is it all the same person that this is about? Oh no, I mean there's so you were getting a string of bad guys.
Oh yeah, I did not know how to be. I learned a lot, learned a lot, and I won't, you know, totally hate on him, but yeah, I mean I had I saw this thing where they're like, you have three loves in your life throughout your entire life or something, and I'm like, that's kind of kind of accurate because I had my high school like just super super naive. I'm like, I wish him very well, but that was not love at all. It was just I was very
very young. But we lived together here like right off the voice, like we knew each other before and he knew me before that. And then after the voice, he was like, it just was way too young, yeah to go through any of that, Yeah, especially as a as a younger boy.
Yeah.
Yeah, Like I'm sure it's turning it for you to handle it now. He's trying to like pop in to the world with you. So that was a long long time ago.
And then that ended, and then I was single, and then I got into a relationship that was very I thought I was going to marry the guy.
I feel like, I remember when you got in this relationship because I remember seeing it on Instagram and I was like, Okay, it feels like a big relationship.
Yeah, and then it turned out not to be.
Tell us the red flags first, So for people listening, when you see these red flags, they're actually red flags.
I got a text from a random number and it was a girl and she was like, Hey, are you and this person a thing? Because we were kind of talking and I just wanted to make sure and I'm like, hmm, we've been dating a week and this is already happening, and so I want to stay. He was very loving, very loving, and I was just he knew how to do everything. He was like that type of guy. He knew where he just like yeah, I'm like, oh my god,
this is this is so awesome. So I was very blinded and the rest was history and I we did it. Take away is fine. Did it take a while to get out of the relationship? Took a lot to get out because towards the end of the last year of the relationship and we got to a point where his mom was like, send me pictures of your favorite rings, like it was I was like, this is gonna be my guy, even though we have little things to work through. And so the last year of it, it just completely
went downhill. And I'm such a caretaker. I'm just like, what do you need? And if you're in a bad place, I'm like, I'm not going anywhere type of thing.
Like you're like, I'm gonna come meet you in there and you'll go sacrifice yourself, yeah, to meet them, And.
That's what that art. That was the case, and so I did not focus on anything about me at all, And it was like, oh, while I'm doing this, he's entertaining other women, and I'm like I So I ran myself dry I was like, I and then trying to be this trying to sing, go out on stage, and that's not an easy schedule. And so when I get stressed and I get anxiety, I don't have an appetite. So then I lose weight very very quickly, and so that gets misled online. So they're like, oh, I get
shamed for that all the time. They're like, you're so skinny, and are you intorexic? And I mean people comment on it all the time and controls all the time. Oh yeah, oh yeah. And so that time I had lost so much weight to the point where my mom was like freaking out and I'm like, I'm fine, I'm fine. When I was not fine, and towards the end of it, he would like break up with me randomly, just randomly, and I'm like, what did I what happen? What did
I do? You're questioning your whole worth. Then we'd get back together because I was just so wrapped into it. This was the last time we got back together. I had a girl. She was a college girl. They met out on the lake and she sent me a snapchat of her laying on his couch and him in a towel closing the blinds. Yeah, yeah, Like I saw a visual that was like the very very last of it. It was just so bad, and it was like at that point I was like, oh my gosh, like this
is insane. And then I remember I was out with Jordan Davis singing Midnight Crisis and we were out on the Lukecombs tour and that was like my job to go out and sing Midnight Crisis with Jordan. It was so fun, so fun. And that was like when we were not together but still fighting all the time. It was like we still were in contact. And I get a fan. Actually, a couple DMed me and they were like, hey girl. So we were at Kava and I know this was your boyfriend, but I know this isn't you.
And they were like wrapped around each other, just waiting to get food. Got that after I got off stage, and I got that DM.
And you're just living with your gut falling down all the time. You're just like swallowing.
My body is just being destroyed. So after you got off stage, you got that text. I got that DM, and my best friend Kyle was with me, and I just handed I didn't even say anything. I just handed it on the phone, and if you're like living your dreams on stage, we were having so much fun. You're living keaven and hell at the same time, seriously, and we are having so much fun. And that's just life.
Does kill the devil does. He's like, Hey, you're having a good time and you're trying to like live your life, but never mind me ruin it for you.
Yeah, And so so you were like actually in complete turmoil while living some of the best moments of your life.
Hey, it's Mike d and this week a movie Mike's Movie Podcast. I am celebrating Hispanic heritage a month and sharing what I believe are the most essential movies when it comes to representing Mexican American life. My parents came here from Mexico, and I shared why these movies represent the things that they went through. I talked about things that I never really talked about before and all because of movies. So be sure to check it out in
its entirety. It would mean a lot to me. But right now, here's just a little bit of movie Mike's Movie Podcast. The first one in this starter pack has to be La Bamba, which is the biopick of Richie Vallens. He was the first Mexican American superstar, and he sadly passed the way just eight months after his big breakthrough,
so his entire career was less than a year. And as a kid, this movie was so impactful to me because, like Richie Vallens, I wanted to be a rock star and seeing somebody who has brown skin be in that role of rock star was so inspiring to me. That is what I wanted to do. Before I was doing podcasting, before I was doing radio, I was playing in bands, singing and playing guitar, and I'd always think back of this movie and think, oh, man, I want to look
cool like Richie Vallens. And I think now as an adult, it is inspiring to me to think about the time that he did this in back when there were not people at all who look like him, at the top of the radio charts, playing on television, selling albums the way he did. And one of the scenes and moments in this movie that really resonated with me was Richie Valen's decision to change his name to be more appealing to this American audience. Here's that moment from La Bamba.
Your professional name from now on.
It's Richie with the T ri tchie.
I got a new last name for you, too, Valence with an S Richie Vallens.
As I grab you, I don't like it, that's for sure, man.
I mean Valenzuela was our dad's last name.
You can't just cut it in half.
It's no big deal.
People in this business they changed their names like they change wives.
Even me.
My last name is Koon.
I kind of did this in school without thinking about it because Mike isn't my real name, and growing up I was called my My family actually gave me the nickname Mikey because of a movie, obviously, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. You have Mikey aka Michelangelo, and we were all huge fans of that movie as a family, so everybody just called me Mikey growing up. Eventually, I thought, I don't want to be called Mike anymore. I don't want to be an adult in college of people called me Mikey.
So I dropped a y and went by Mike. And then I developed a stage name because I was working in radio and there are so many mics. My last name for being a Mexican is pretty common if you search it you get so many results. And also, my decision to change my name to give me kind of an alter ego was something I did just because I felt my name was common. But I also feel like if you see the name Mike on paper, you don't
know what you're getting. And I don't know if that has had some impact on some of the opportunities I've been given over the years, because you hear the name Mike d stre and you don't really know what I am. Some people assume I'm Ittallion. But I just created the name because I felt it was unique and because I felt that I could get that name on every single social media platform, which I have to this day Mike Cadistro on all socials. So the history of me changing
my name all goes back to La Bamba. That is why I consider this movie to be an essential for Mexican Americans. We'll get out of the eighties now, and next up on the list, I have from nineteen ninety seven Selena, which is the story of the life and tragic death of Selena Quinta niep Edies. She was a Mexican American singer who rose to fame in the early nineteen nineties. And obviously the movie serves as a biopic.
What I feel that this movie does a great job of is showing what it's like to be a Mexican American artist in a predominantly white industry and how you struggle to maintain your heritage while also trying to achieve mainstream success, in Selina's case, specifically being a Mexican American who doesn't primarily speak Spanish. And there's a scene where her dad, he is describing that struggle of having to live in both of these worlds and be twice as perfect.
Being Mexican American is tough.
Anglos jump all over you if you don't speak English perfectly. Mexicans jump all over you if you don't speak Spanish perfectly.
We've got to be twice as perfect as anybody else.
I mean, we gotta know about John Wayne and Phil in Funding, we gotta know about Frank Sinatra and Augustine Lada, we gotta know about Oprah and Christina. And we got to prove to the Mexicans how Mexican we are, and we got to prove to the Americans how American we are.
We gotta be more.
Mexican than the Mexicans and more American than Americans both at the same time.
It's exhausting.
I would quote that line all the time.
It's exhausting, which it is.
And I've experienced this a lot, not just on a professional level, but just on a per level. Of those times when I would go to Mexico to visit my family there and they look at you differently because they know, oh, your parents may be from here, but you are an American, and they are over criticizing your Spanish. They make you feel that you're kind of a sellout for speaking English, dressing the way that you do, thinking that you're better
than them because you're wearing American brands. They'll call you names, they'll make fun of you if you don't know all the slang. You better not be caught dead speaking English in Mexico because they will grill you. And then you come back to the United States and you have to speak perfect English. And let me tell you, if you grew up speaking Spanish or any other language that is not English, it is a very difficult language to learn.
The English language makes no sense. And I was lucky that my older brother and older sister had already learned English. Even though they came here and they learned Spanish first, and they learned English by watching TV a lot, watching movies. Even my mom watching Sesame Street with me as a kid, she would learn English from that, and obviously in her job now has had to learn English. My dad knows English,
even though they still prefer to speak Spanish. They knew that living in the United States, it was going to be difficult for them if they did not learn it. But there is this pressure from both sides that you have to be the best of both worlds because if not, you're seen as being a sellout. You're seeing as being an outcast. And for me, that is really the message
that this movie drove home. Also obviously showcasing the music of Selena and how impactful her career was, how quickly she rose to fame, and how sad her story is, which sadly all the stories about Mexican and American musicians don't end will spoiler alert, but Selena is a classic. That's why I included it as the third movie on my Essentials list.
Hey, thanks for listening to this week Sunday Sampler.
New episodes are out weekly, so there's always something to listen to. If you have something you heard here, please go and follow and subscribe. That would help us a bunch. Thank you and have a great week everybody.