SORE LOSERS: Why Was Lunchbox Hanging With High School Chicks?

I wasn't where you went to the super Bowl, dude.

Yeah, super Bowl sweatshirt.

That's pretty nice, man. That's good on you.

You can buy merch and not go to the actual game. Really, I'm trying to not wear around brother though bad memories. Oh man, they got skunk forty six or something. So it seemed like I never know the exact score of things, but I know the National Championship. I really didn't even watch it, but it seemed like Florida one by five this game. I watched it till the third quarter, I think it final. It seemed like a forty to six game. It was probably forty twenty.

They got blowed out. Yeah, and I didn't remember that until you just told me. That's how quick we forget that it was a blowout.

But you think about it and you just remember Chiefs got the doors blowed off.

I mean, they never had a chance. Like it was over.

It's awesome when you say it's gonna be Eagles and then it ends up being Eagles and you say the Eagles are gonna kill them, But then you have people four months later say the Sison Jinks. Guys, what about the Sis Jinks? When I said they were gonna kill him. Well, we don't remember that, got it? Selective memories coach over to you.

I do know that that is your sensitive subject is when people say you're the Sison Jinks, Like I feel like that is something that you do not like. And I can tell it bothers you because every time someone says it, you bring it up and you want to point out which ones you got.

Right because and the thing with the Sisson Jinks on this one is, guys, Duke had a ninety six percent chance up six points with thirty seconds left, Duke would have won the national championship. I would have been dead correct if not some overwhelming luck that just fell in the the crotch of the other team, which is what happened.

You know what's crazy is if my aunt would have been born with balls, should have been my uncle.

Hey man. You know if that McDonald's, if it had a space needle on the top, it'd be called this space needle.

That's crisy man, That is wild. Yeah, ifs and buds and candy nuts, you know what I mean. What happened is what happened. You can't change the outcome.

Hey man, If this wasn't a skyscraper, and we didn't have microphones, this would be a waffle house. If that street wasn't called Broadway, man, it'd be called freaking the Bronx.

Hey, hey, it would be called Beal Street. No one would be on it because that's Memphis.

You know they're gonna be partying though, right, what you haven't been studying. There's gonna be a home game for Memphis?

Oh for the playoffs? Yeah, well, of course there's gonna be a home game because they're gonna be in the playoffs.

Right, But just how it all shakes out, I believe because of the playing thing, Memphis will now have a home game. Is Memphis going to be in the play in Yeah, because if you're the bottom four, you're in the playing game. They're putting in twenty teams in the playoffs.

No, No, they put in like twelve teams. I do understand that everybody's in except for there's only like four teams that are eliminated from the playoffs.

Right. The Saskatchewan timber Ratlers are not in, and some other team called the chang Wall Tigers are not in. Any NBA team.

Is in the playoffs, dude, I mean the Spurs are definitely not in the playoffs. Man, we went and gotten deer and Fox and then he got hurt and when we got hurt, and we are terrible. Let me see where Oh the Memphis grit Oh dude, it is not settled yet. The Memphis Grizzlies and the Golden State Warriors are tied, and the Denver Nuggets and the LA Clippers, they all are looking at the play in game two of those, one of those teams is gonna be in the play in I don't know which one.

They're all. There's four teams going into play.

In, right, but the play in the Minnesota Timberwolves, the Sacramento Kings, and the Dallas Mavericks and the Phoenix Sun. Oh my god, guys, I don't even when the NBA plays next week. No, no, it can already be settled by the time this podcast is put up.

It won't be. The NBA ends this week, NHL ends this week, the Masters is this week.

I understand what everything is. I understand that things are.

Or people don't know the ramifications until they turn on their television and Sports Center tells them, well, guess what Sports Center doesn't exist? We tell you we break it down. The sports center we used to know doesn't exist anymore. They don't show highlights.

Do you remember how good like? That's all it used to be.

We would set our alarms for seven am to watch the headline of Sports Center of Stuart Scott man the bulls as cool as the other side of the pillow? How's it going cool kids? Stuart Scott It's like MTV.

MTV used to be music videos with a show occasionally mixed in. They haven't showed a music video on MTV in fifteen years. I don't even understand why people still make music videos. Can someone please explain to me why music videos are still made? Why do they spend hundreds of thousands or even maybe I don't even know, maybe a million dollars on a music video? Tell me who watches music video and where? When is the last time you watched a music video.

There's a Riley Green one where he's banging some chick. My wife showed it to me so a week ago.

Where did you watch.

It on her phone? No? No, I I didn't what am I being in terrogame?

I didn't mean like you've been depositioned. I'm at what platform? Did you watch it on I guess YouTube.

Yes, but I agree with you. Why are these artists spending twenty thousand dollars on a music video?

It makes no sense on twenty thousand and you know it's.

Even deeper and crazier than that. One of the label guys said, yeah, when we do our phones now, they when they program a song, they try to make it so it sounds good on your phone, not necessarily in the speakers in your car, because more people listen on their phones to stuff than they do in their vehicles.

Seriously.

Yeah, and so I go, what how does that affect me? I'm an audio guy, Leave me alone. But then I thought, wow, that was actually really deep. And so then artists are getting mad, Oh the crap, it doesn't sound as good. But they said, all these gen zers banging it on their phone while they're in high school, we want it to sound the best when they do that.

You know what else I find funny talking about wasting money. The music videos I feel like are a wasting money. Another thing is that people don't know is when a new song comes out, artists or their record labels they send stuff to the studio preach and it's like junk. It is absolute junk.

How much do you think they spend on it?

Well, if they're sending it to every radio station, you gotta think they're sending it to every country music station in America, right or or fifty percent of them. And those little swag bags or whatever they are trinkets, they had to be spending one hundred thousand dollars on them.

And an example is Blake Shelton has a new song named I Don't Know Texas should have been in Texas, never heard it, and he made men yls. We just got this one, but you don't open your mail, and it is a very miniature version of a record that you can only play on a record player. That's in a cool little collector's disc and they gave it to us all and it's sitting now in the radio station in my on my desk. But that's something they would give to us.

But it's a mini vinyl, so you need a mini record player. You're not even a real record player.

I think you can play it on a regular one. But if you don't have a record player, it's completely pointless and an expense that you probably shouldn't have even made in the first place, Like I'm.

Trying to think of some of the stuff they've sent over the years.

It's like, oh, no one if an artist is doing anything with time. One time every hour on the hour, they brought over one time food, They delivered stuff and it said clockwork, and they brought over like watches and clocks you put in your office.

It's just random stuff that no one needs, no one wants. And it's like, why do you spend all that money? It's not gonna make me. Oh you know what, they gave me a satchel full of fake coins, you know, money time. Oh you know what I mean. I love that song oil money.

Who had a great one? Who had a great one? Who had a great one when we first moved here, Who had a great one? We became one of the funniest props in the old studio. Who we've talked about it before, who had a good one? Cole Swidell?

Okay, he sent a cooler and said chilling it, okay.

And we put a bunch of beer in it.

Now, see that actually has a functional use. Correct, that cooler has a use. But still, how much did they spend on coolers? That is so much money?

But they promoted the song, yes, but did that make you listen to the song more? Who knows?

No, Like you just told me right now, I couldn't even remember why who sent it or when you were talking about.

So I agree some of the promotional stuff is just completely ridiculous. But when they promote it with free concert tickets, that helps different.

Yeah, but like, what was the one that just came? It was, uh, the roses.

That wasn't for me. That was just for Amy and you know he's only for the girls.

But they sent bouquets of roses, and it's like, guys, what are we doing?

I mean that was for a different reason. Oh, I might have been trying to land some digits there. I thought that was more because the song was something about roses. It was. But smart. If you're a dude and you make a song, heck, just marketed towards women, all the radio women will watch you.

I guess.

I don't know.

I just feel like we waste a lot of money. And so when you said music videos, I just still can't believe when someone's like, oh, yeah, we shot this music video, I'm like, really, music videos? Maybe I don't understand. Maybe I'm missing it. Maybe they put it on their Instagram and people watch it. But I just don't know people that go consume music videos now.

But you can also make money off YouTube if they get one hundred thousand hits.

Oh, so they're putting it on YouTube.

That's the key. And then I don't give a crap about their Instagram. You I get paid there, but all this stuff's going to YouTube.

So maybe that's why they Maybe we answered full circle, why they still make music videos. They put it on YouTube and people go watch it on YouTube.

I had no idea.

Huh, hey, I learned something new every night else to Ben in Texas? Is it a good song?

It is? It is the jam? Huh yeah, man, are we taking a break or what is it? How long has it been? I've forgot ten and a half?

You want to take a break already? No, No, you got a question for you. How'd you sleep last night?

Ray? Sheeesh? Four hours? Oh, but I took out massive nap three hours in the afternoon, so all I needed was four dang, but those were good four yours.

Oh dude, let me tell you. I usually come on here and tell you that I slept terrible and then I woke up so many times I was unconscious.

That means dead.

Now I was dead to the world, dude, dead to the world. It was the most beautiful sleep I've had in probably a month.

You wake up, you got robbed. It was so amazing.

There was no noises, no kids crying out, no nothing. I mean I didn't have to get up and pee, there was no vomit, stories, there was nothing. It was literally just lay there and sleep and it was so fan fantastic.

That's why you need a night nanny. Al Dean twenty twenty three. I do believe someone in my hood. I think they got a night nanny. Shehh, I think, but I may be wrong. Matt's something. If we didn't talk to these country artists would have never known about it. I never heard of it. These people have a woman or man come over to their house at eight as they're getting tucked into bed and stays up with their kids a whole night.

No, no, they don't even they did. Here's a damn rich here's the great thing about a night What do you call night nanny or night nurse?

I don't remember what they call him. So Alding goes man, you need to get you a night nanny. That's it.

They don't have to stay awake. They say, play somebody to come sleep, yes, and then if the baby wakes up, you get up with the baby. That's what the night nanny is. The night nanny doesn't have to stay awake the whole time. The night nanny just has to be the one on call so when the baby cries, so they can get there eight hours of sleep in the other bedroom.

That is actually something that if you're rich, spend your money on a lot of the stuff. I say, why does this person need a seadoo and Dominican Republic, it makes no sense. They use it twice a year. Why does this person need a shuttle from the airport to the place they're staying at when they can just do one the generical one. Why do they need a private shuttle? I'm with you, Actually we do private shuttle. It's actually way better because ray, what the heck you trying to tell you?

I thought my neighbors had one, and I hit them up and I said, oh, look at you fancies. I see you got a little night nanny. I see that tahoe parked out front.

And he said it was just some night panny.

And he goes, no, we upgraded to a tahoe, and I'm like, oh, my bad, totally wrong. But I mean, how weird is it that you have someone come in and take care of your child so you can sleep. I thought the whole point, the whole like bonding moment to struggle, like to feel like a real parent, is those three am when they start crying and you gotta wake up. You're miserable, but that's what bonds you with

And then they go play a show for two hours and call it a job. Come on, I mean that would be a night. Jeez.

I need that one lifestyle party.

I heard him say, yeah, you go play those shows. It's very not he didn't use the word unfulfilling, but he goes, Then I got to go work on the property, so I feel like I've did something. So you're telling me your career is based off of getting on a stage and doing something that doesn't even really feel like that hard to work. So then the next day you have to go work on the property, so you feel like you worked. Man, I should have been a singer.

But I don't care. I don't need to feel like i've worked. I like once I do my work, even if I'm not tired, and I don't feel like I worked that hard, I don't need to go find something else to be like. You know what, this proves I worked hard. Now I'm good.

Man.

I put in my five eight hours, twelve hours, twenty six hours, whatever it is. I don't need an extra task to make me feel like I worked. If I worked, I worked.

But there is a difference, baser, Why are you in such a great mood? Man? You want to do everything? Yeah, today it was easy days compared to those essdays. Yeah. Yeah, I got both my eyes open, I can see straight. What's up?

Hey, I am with you. There are easy days and hard days.

Man, you're seeing awesome. Yeah I didn't work today.

Yeah, it's crazy.

How great your attitude is when you don't have a job, when you get sent home early.

I got a question, though, when you wear that super Bowl shirt speaking a job.

I'm gonna wear it every damn day. You know how many people have talked to me about it?

A nice question?

You said something, I said something. Everybody keeps saying something. I go, oh, yeah, I's in Nola.

That's exact.

The gas station. Hell, the game is baby.

Thank you man, you took the words out of my mouth. I want to know when you go in public, do people like, oh, man, you were at the game. And then he was like, nah, man, someone gave it to me. No, it's a status symbol, dude, Yeah, man, I was in Nola.

What's up? What were you doing? Then? Oh you wash it on TV? Yes, it is.

It's like a it's a uh look at me flex without saying it's an it's a unspoken flex like I went to the super Bowl. It's sort of like when someone wears a Master's shirt or a Master's hat. You only get them at the Master's. You can't buy them online. Right, thank you for the idea. I need to wear that

But it doesn't matter that you go down that path. Just lie to them. But then they're gonna ask you what it was like exactly, that's what's wrong with the Muni or the problems with the Muni. People then ask you detailed questions and you're screwed.

Like that Avery girl that I had on from Challenge Mania that was on the Real World Portland. I was talking to her because she works in Hooters, and I said, man, what's up with Hooters going out of business?

Never heard of it?

And she goes, I don't know anything about that. I mean, I'm going to the Masters with Hooters this weekend. So she's at the.

Masters and there's some still open. There's one by me because it's strong. There's thirty cars by it. Every time I passed.

You know who They sponsor John Daily guess who's playing in the Masters, John Daily, So I she must be high up in Hooters if she's the one going with the Hooters representatives to the Masters.

Is there a minimum measurement to be hired?

I mean, what a freaking job. We need to be sent to the Master.

Yeah, we need to go to commercial.

Yeah, we need to you know what we need to send it to. We need to send it to break. You know what we forgot to do start the show.

We'll start it next time you add to the break, We'll start it.

Yeah, we gotta do the intro, dude, We forgot to do the intro.

Dude.

You did the whole first thing because your computer was not working. Like I gotta loaded. I gotta load it.

We're gonna do it live. Oh the one, two, three, sore losers? What up, everybody? I am lunchbox.

I know the most about sports, suggy, the sports facts, my sports opinions, because I'm pretty much a sports genius.

Guys, real quick, before I start. Arnold actually called us. This is the voicemail he left us from the Masters in AUGUSTA. Hey, boys, have got two point missiles on in my head? What a my pants? You gonna get a two dollars beer.

It's awesome here, good Tiger.

But Tiger's not even playing in the Masters.

Man, I'm gonna say what. Arnold has had the journey of a lifetime. He went from San Antonio at the Final four and he went straight to Augusta. Don't know how he got there, if it was greyhound or if he took a Southwest flight flew in it to Atlanta and then took a taxi. But he is on the grounds at Augusta. He said he would send us pictures, but then he found out that you're not allowed to have your phone inside the pearly gates of Augusta.

Hey, y'all, it is sissing. I'm from the North. I'm an alpha male. I live on the North Side in Nashville with a Broadway girl baser. We have two point two acres. We live in the country. Already said that, and we have two point two kids. At the Vanderbilt Clinic, the electrophysiologist department checks on him head of That is justin over to you, man.

Oh Ray, did you know that high school they have a new sport. It started this year and I got to witness it firsthand.

I'm not getting in this debate.

Girls flag football, Okay, they are now playing flag football in high school and I watched two high school teams battle it out on the turf on Wednesday night.

I'm thinking interesting, I'm thinking it was terrible. Really, I mean, Ray big Booty Judy beat Becky Boots.

I felt bad for the one school. They only had four subs, so they were playing both ways, and they were really small. Their quarterback was kind of fast, but couldn't really throw it. No one could catch it. The blue team, every girl looked like they were six feet tall compared to the Gray team. They would just throw it up and the tall girls would catch it. It was twenty to nothing with about minute to go, and the great team is still calling time outs trying to

Is there a running gamers at all passes.

Ninety percent run and then ten percent pass.

I would say it's different for guys because when we played at interramurals in college, majority of it was passed. I don't think we ever ran. I don't think you could run. You had to drop back and pass.

I think you could run. I don't know. I know we played Inner Murals and we got our butts kicked because we sucked. What were you the slim Reaper? I I mean I was pretty good. I mean I didn't intercept Santana over the top. He was throwing it deep, and I mean it was a per and I ran right between the receiver, right in front of the receiver, got it and came up the sideline and John and Clay thought, oh my god, we thought you were gonna get laid out by that wide receiver.

They're like, we didn't think. I mean that just beautiful.

And Santana was this big athletic dude from South Texas and he played football d one. But he got homesick.

I won't play in the UNFO. He got homesick, and so he moved back. He came back. He didn't want to.

He got tired and he was too far from home because he went to Florida somewhere, uh some small school and was homesick. And he came back and he dominated the Innermural field.

Yeah, I my only memory of Innermurals college team was pretty good. We had a great quarterback. He could make it rain out there and a wide receiver. I just remember I'd made an interception in the end zone ran it back ninety nine yards for a touchdown. But I was wearing cleats that were a size too big, so as I was getting in for the touchdown, my foot my cleat. Like you know, when shoes aren't the right size,

Yeah, I had a fifteen yard pick six to win the game. Only I picked six, and as a celebration, I dove into the end zone. They threw a flag fifteen yards, so then a touchdown didn't count. Why celebrate, I mean taunting. Didn't realize you could do that in flag football. I was like, what's the big deal?

And you don't realize on TV, we don't in person. That ninety nine yards I ran. It's a long one took forever. I don't know how nobody caught me. I'd say probably ten times. I thought, Oh, he's gonna get me.

He's gonna get me.

Shoes are two bikes, shooster to bake. Are we the area yet? Okay? Here we go up pen zone? Put them fall over? Oh great, touchdown? Thanks, it was my shoes. They tripped me. Ah, how's it going? Touchdown? That is forever? Well, I'll tell you what.

They make it look fun on the TV when you dive in the end zone, like celebrating. And when I did my dive, I'm like, yeah, boom, landed on my shoulder. Mate. That hurts a lot more than it looks on TV. And then I got the fifteen yard taunting and it didn't even count. Really drove me up a wall. That really made me mad. So the touchdown didn't count. I landed on my shoulder for nothing, and we ended up. I think it was a tie. I think they tied

Never forget it. I would go work out before our intermural football game and then i'd play in oer mural, so I'd be all ripped and everything, and I thought I was so awesome. They just had me running a little seven and outs. I was Travis Kelce homeless version, so all I would do was pick up four yards on a second first or second down and then we'd do the deep bombs. Yeah. I was never Randy Moss. I was never Javonte Davante Adams. I was never Justin Jefferson.

I got thrown on a team with a bunch of people from the dorms like and so this dude, John ended up be in my roommate later. He's like, hey, man, we're gonna start. We're gonna practice on Tuesday nights.

I let him.

I said, practice, Are you serious? We're gonna practice. We're in college, bro, we're gonna practice. Well, apparently everybody practiced. I didn't realize this intermural flag football was a big deal. People practiced, and maybe that's why we weren't very good, and maybe we just had a lot of people that didn't give a crap because we practiced, but we we still sucked. And we had this one guy, Jamal on our team, and he was talking about how good he is.

Yeah, go take care of it. There's a there's a corner over there, but next to the volleyball ten. So why are you limping?

Man?

It hurts. It hurts.

I mean, I thought he blew a hamstring, dude, And he said he he sprained his fingers.

Nobody tells you this, though, but freshman year of innermurals careful because everybody's still living their high school glory. None of them made it to college sports, so they if it doesn't matter what it is, they're doing. They're going one hundred percent softball, football, the basketball, soccer. Guys, none of it matters. It all should just be for fun. That should be the building the buddy, the bro building system, camaraderie.

The girls in our dorm though, they were really good. They put a squad together, Gabby gg Anna, Jessica, Andrea Windy, and they would win the whole school. They win all of UTSA and they would go to like regionals every year.

I could wear a wig, I could be Leah.

It was amazing and Anna, I think her name was Anna. She was the quarterback. She could chunk the ball, she was very athletic. And then she went on to marry Nick Barnes from my high school. I mean, I don't even know how they met. She don't know how they met. But after college, I look on Facebook and she's married to this dude I went to high school with. I'm like, what, how did that happen? They got like five kids. I don't know if they're still together.

I have no idea. I haven't checked on them, but it's a great story. So they took a intermural college sport and now it's a real one that they played high schools and you watched it.

Yeah, I watched it, and not on purpose, dude. I was a creep on the sideline though, because I had a soccer game at six fifteen.

Hurry, I need an alibi, Honey, get here, say we have kids stuff.

And it was across town, so I'm fighting traffic. It took me thirty eight minutes in traffic to get to this game. And my game is at six fifteen. It says you will arrive at six eleven. It's taking me all these back roads to fight the traffic. I pull in the parking lot at six eleven PM and the parking lot is jam packed. I can't find a parking spot. I thought the soccer arena closed. This is outdoor now because it's suddy.

Well nice weather boat is the truck driver. No, So I'm like, oh my gosh.

I finally find a parking spot and there's these people leaving and they have uniforms on.

So I'm assuming it was a girl's soccer game. Hey, homie, can I take your parking spot? Thank you?

G No, I didn't say any of that. Oh, I thought you were.

Trying to relate with the gen zers. Now, hey, is it gucci? If I pull up?

Hey, can I can I park in your low emission vehicle spot?

Man? Like? I didn't creep?

Hey, I liked I liked the environment, just like you like the environment.

Man? Hey, am I in a TikTok video? Or can I park? You're a creep?

Go?

Yeah?

So I roll up and there's these girls leaving the opposing team. So I'm assuming it was a soccer game, and how's it going, hose? I thought, okay, coop, cool, cool soccer, But then I realized soccer season is pretty it is probably over by now, pretty much. Uh So I get out there and I'm like, oh, and they're just now starting a fight football game. I'm like, wait, what So there was one game earlier and then now there's another game. Our game was supposed to start at

Yeah. Yeah, but the only thing creepier is you standing there with binoculars.

Oh no, no, I was on the sideline, man, like all the side like there was like two for six teams because there's three soccer fields they make, And so we're all just there on the sideline watching this flag football game. And I'm surprised the cops that were there didn't say, hey, can you guys move back up to the stands, But they let us just sit on the sideline and watch the game. And we had to sit

I'm for it. Double bookings, guys, get these kids out. People are in shape. That's America. Nobody on their couches anymore. It's more active. You know what we knocked pickleball. I mean I don't. I just think some people, like I have seen how pickleball supposed to be. You play with your chick, you play, That's what it needs to be. And the reason I don't like it around my neighborhood is because it's an elitist sport, is it? I don't know.

Man, I'd love to see them out there playing. I just was a little frustrated that I had to sit there and watch the game and wait for my soccer game for an extra hour. So as we're as the girls are walking off the field, We're walking onto the field and a couple of the girls are laughing.

They're like, oh my god.

They're like, what time were you guys supposed to start? And I'm like, you guys are I can't talk to you?

And I dated your mom's and going lunchbox and she was like no, no, like did we hold you guys up?

And I'm like no, no, I'm not having anybody think we're flirting. I'm not talking to you. And one of the girls on my team was like, oh, we're supposed to play at sixty fifteen.

They're like, oh, we're so sorry.

And the girl goes, oh, we're not mad at you.

It's not your fault. Thank you, dad, bod. How's it going? And she was like, well, good luck, hey Boomer, what are you all gen zers? How's it going lunchbox? And then the girl on my team goes, oh, congratulations on your guys is win? Thank you? Yeah, thank you. We're a little bit older. How's it going lunchbox?

Yeah, I'm like more than almost three times you're eight. No, no, not three times, just twice, may almost three times maybe, I mean they may have been sixteen fifteen. Oh man, if they're fifteen, then I am pretty much right at three times our age.

That's ugly, But don't think it like that, dude. I mean I chill with Boomer, and Boomer is that age. Yeah, but that's you know, I'm fam different. But what's the difference between me being a creep hanging out with somebody that's my family or you being a creep just talking to somebody that's.

The walking off the football field and I'm going on there to play soccer and she is stopping me to chat. Her parents are probably up in the stands, like, what is this dude talking to my daughter out on the field.

That's it's all in your eye, your head. Perception is reality. But it's all in your head, dude, because I don't have those thoughts. And I hang out with Boomer and he's twenty five years younger than me, but.

He's your family. Nobody knows that.

When I'm going to get an ice cream with Boomer at the Luke local joint Bobby's ice Cream and I'm licking it down right on the street corner with a seventeen year old kid, nobody knows driving by that he's my nephew. He looks like your son. Then that's fine. No, he's tallered me though. They it looks like I'm creeping on an ice cream joint.

They know when I'm walking out into the soccer field that this girl is not my kid, not my family, not anything. And if mom and dad see me out there talking to her, I think I've stopped their daughter to have a conversation. Yeah, like, hey, I like the way you play football. No thanks, I'm not gonna end up like these teachers do in the back of cop cars. I mean, have you seen the latest one?

Yeah, the lady bang the kid gets arrested. Her husband's in the car and doesn't know why she's getting arrested. And she doesn't know why she's getting arrested. She's like what am I?

Like? Is there anything you need to get out of the car? And she's like, am I going somewhere?

Then it dawns on her in the cop cars and then arrested for hooking up with a fifteen and.

She starts bawling her eyes out, talking about how she's gonna vomit, and the guy's like, do you want to bag?

And she's like, yes, I want to bag And she.

Knows her life is over and then all this stuff comes out about the manifesto, like she's been keeping a journal of their relationship in her phone, and it is the most bizarre thing I have ever heard in my life. It is like, oh my gosh, I can't believe you cheated on me with that girl, you know, the one you said you were just friends with, and you're just messing with my head. And I swear I was never gonna let her another boy f with my head and

I don't know, man, I never had a hot teacher.

So no, no, but what no?

No? I understand? Was it just me? Or were our teacher's the only ones that were all seventy years old? Dude?

We had a couple hot ones. My second grade teacher was a smoke show.

Well, this girl that got in trouble was she hot smoke show? Okay, that's what I just saw the police footage. I didn't see her glammed up, so I was just curious if you'd seen.

But even in her police I don't look pretty good.

I don't think we had a teacher that was above afore Okay, but what I'm what a wild scenario to have a hot teacher. I was never presented that missus uh Vi, missus Will's Missus Willis. I mean she had Missus Willis in fifth grade. She was eighty five years old, and I changed the name for reasons being. She was eighty five years old, and there was rumors that she drank Bailey's in her coffee easily close to ninety. That's the type of teachers I was dealing with in Michigan.

I understand it from that fifteen year old boys perspective.

Oh on a second, guys, miss willis looking pretty damn hot at eighty five. I'll be late for practice. Don't check the bleachers.

I understand it from the fifteen year old boys perspective.

Okay, I get okay.

I want to understand how this twenty six year old hottie.

Guys, I've got an the deployment with mister VIVI what he's teaching me math?

This twenty six year old hottie goes for a fit, Like, explain that to me, Like this lady is not as beauty. She's a good looking shit Like good looking.

All right, we gotta take a break. We're not gonna judge how hot this chick was that is now in jail in our prison system because of the R word.

No No, I want to know why, Like, how does that happen? Like how does she get to the point where she is hitting on a fifteen years.

She's an attractive teacher. I've never been in an attractive teacher. I've never been a student that had an attractive teacher. So I don't know how that situation presents itself. Maybe at hot at schools in California. There's hot teachers. In Michigan, every teacher is seventy and aged.

You're not You're You're not even looking at it from the right perspective.

How does she my Spanish teacher, Yeah, missus hinsu bro. She was eighty seven and she spoke Spanish. We didn't even speak the same language. I'm telling you there was no chance in hell you could ever even start a relationship with these people.

My buddy, my buddy. He went somewhere in South America for vacation and he met some ship that spoke only Spanish, and he's like, dude, I think this is the one. And I'm like, dude, you can't even communicate with her like you can. And he was like, no, no, we're gonna keep in touch. We're gonna keep in touch, like it was amazing. Like he spent two nights with her in South America. He's like, this is gonna be great, got her phone number. But she spoke Spanish, he spoke English.

Now, to get you off your point, I dated a couple of girls in coastry and not dated went on a date with him that spoke Spanish. It's miserable. You think it's funny and you're cool with It's You're cool until two sentences later of the Spanish, you know, and you're just staying there looking at each other. No amount

I just want to know how she gets to that point. I mean, the text messages she was sending to this fifteen year old were, oh my gosh, the sex with you is so amazing. It's always so passionate. This morning sex was not that long, but it was so good. Like, where does she get to the point where she is going after a fifteen year old dude? I there as stories in the news all the time, these teachers doing it, but I need to know how it happens.

It starts with a hot teacher, That's where it starts.

I understand the hot teacher. But how does the hot teacher allow it to happen? The hot teacher has to say no to a fifteen year old. How does the hot teacher fall in love with a fifteen or sixteen year old?

Explain it? They should. There should be a hot teacher database. Check in on them every week.

Check their phones, check their emails, check everything.

With the Michian teachers, they're in the clear.

But the problem is sometimes it's ugly teachers. These kids go for the ugly teachers. I've seen it. It's just blows my mind that this woman was so hot and she is so in love with this sixteen year old, talking about like, you know, there's gonna be one day when we are we're okay to be in each other's lives because we're gonna be in each other's for lives forever. It may me not be romantically, but we're gonna We care too much about each other for us not to

My guidance counselor, who I would spend time with talking about colleges, was in her seventies, and I'm gonna go back this for you to your second choice of a college. Okay, I'll see you later. Hey, that's what I had to deal with. There was never a temptation. Ray, What about the guys.

I mean Miss Benton she wasn't hot, but she was cute. I mean, what other hot teachers do we have?

I don't really know. Many, man.

We had Missus Whiteside. She was eighty five years old, Like, she was so old. She taught my buddy's mom when she was in high school. So, I mean that tells you how old she was. And she was still our teacher. And her coffee breath was the nastiest thing I've ever smet.

Can you not do that in my mouth? They all loved reading, wore wore glasses, just weren't funny, talked about weird stuff of the news and stuff, and you just had nothing in common with him. And those do these people start relationships? And does the fifteen year old make a move first, as the teacher had to make the move. Teacher has to make the move right. The one lady, Missus Boyle, she was so old she had a wig. These ladies were older than ladies at church. My teachers.

No, no, we we just came back from commercial. But my question is how much of the Masters are you going to watch Saturday Sunday?

Like?

Are you gonna sit there all day?

Is it? Oh? I'm only waiting till the final round? What do we got? So? I'm a romantic Give me a minute. If you got one, I got it. Can you have any romantic music? Yeah? I can do this one right here. It's our crime podcast, and I have a speak. I have no other romance music. Okay, I just wondered that's approved. I mean unless this is that's not romance. Okay, there's no music, guys. You guys don't give a rip about music. So I haven't been betting. I've been trying to do. I have a futures bet.

No day to day bet, congratulations.

Well, I haven't watched golf in two months since I haven't done the day to day betting. Oh, so that tells me the gambling is the reason I was watching it. So now we get to the Masters tournament, there's a lot of big names. I wanted to do some research so I could make a prediction and people could either love me or hate me, make fun of me, say this isn't Jinks one direction or the other. So I did say Hovelin's gonna win because he had a great practice round. And I did say it's gonna be a

I don't know how they do it. I don't know if you can only watch it online, but I know that if you watch online. Shane Bacon is the voice of the featured group Shout Out. Shane Bacon from Longview, Texas. He is the brother of Alisha Bacon, who went to Trinity University in San Antonio, Texas. That is how I know. Alisha used to date my roommate John and then Shane was really good at golf, talked about him all the time. Then he used to write reviews. But I don't know

Well, there's a way to know. I should have actually done one second a prep ESPN plus.

Right, No, no, I'm talking. Just have it on ESPN the first two rounds and CBS the minute they tee off in the morning on Saturday and Sunday.

Have it on TV.

This is the most watched golf tournament of the year.

I should have done one second research. It's on ESPN, Plus. So unless you have ESPN Plus, I bet you can't watch it on ESPN. You can't watch it on the Golf channel, and it will only be on CBS and at two o'clock, which is exactly what I just said. Why do we have to wait till two pm? Why not cover it all day all day? Have masters coverage.

Make it so easy for people to get so I can sit there and watch it. I don't like jumping through hoops and ESPN Plus maybe the worst and I mean worst streaming service in the history of streaming services.

Only had it for golf gambling a year ago, got rid of it, got it back, and I think we only get it now because we have a Kroger membership at Disney something and it's for free over to you.

I try to watch anything on ESPN Plus and it freezes every ten seconds?

What right? What do you mean oots it reads? Is it just ass get ball everything?

UFC? I buy a UFC fight, it freezes. It is so horrible, horrible.

That's why I did have it for one of those fights where they made you get ESPN and then you had to pay an additional eighty dollars, and I think it was to see sugar didn't freeze, though it was good. We watched it at the neighbor's house. Watching it at Dodds, it was banging.

Well, fine is always banging, except for when it freezes and freezes and freezes. So eventually I have to get my computer out, turn on ESPN Plus and plug it into the TV, and so it'll go to the TV from my computer.

Then it works most of the time.

But if you just try to go on your TV and watch ESPN Plus, it is worse than damn frozen.

Well, and speaking of freezing and stuff, so we got an issue at the house. The country's been awesome. Internet Wi Fi bang and cell phones banging was a worry of mine. Guys, country life might even be better in city Wi fi's banging. I can stream porn, I can stream anything. So let me say this though, what we've been dealing with is it gets fuzzy. So you know, the picture quality is high deaf thirty six hundred. I made that up. It'll go down to high death one

No, not on SBU plus, it never goes away. I try to watch a Kansas bast I don't even want to talk about that team, this basketball team that I cheered for. I tried to turn into their games when it wasn't on the regular channel, and I swear to God, I would mis I would see every third play because it was freeze, and they would jump to where the live action is, then freeze, then jump to live action, and you just turn it off.

I was gonna say you, there's no way you stuck with it?

No, hell no. I get so frustrated and I tell my wife and I get so bad on my technology is so stupid. We relies so much on this crap and then it doesn't ever freaking work, and then I think it doesn't work for me. That's what I tell her, and she tells me, I'm gonna I'm like, I guarantee you. I'm the only one that has this problem. Technology hates me. It does not want to work for me. It doesn't want me to watch the UFC fight, It doesn't want to watch that basketball team that I love. It doesn't

And the technology thing of it is, do you rewind? I get ESPN plus you can't do that. But for some of the others, you know, you can rewind and sometimes it fixed the problem.

I did do that on Netflix when the stupidest fight of all time.

And didn't work? It did? It did with Tyson and our boy Logan Paulino. What the I mean, Loala Mailer, what is it? Logan American? I mean, how stupid are we to Paul American? Paul American New stupid show that they have but that is their I'm not watching it. I watched the one episode is a terror. Yeah, the parents shouldn't be included, and it makes no sense. It's cool to see how rich they are and they are given some real but guys, I don't know what works.

They didn't grow up rich.

No, they just started doing They always were going to be TV guys. The parents gave them a camp quarter and they always put stuff on the internet, always always. Then the advent of the YouTube and it took off, blew up.

So what was their YouTube?

It was like, oh, you want you want to know the advent of something that blew them, blew them up and got them rich. I think I know what when they hung no, I mean no, no, they were already popular, but that was newsworthy and that eventually that kind of canceled them, but then eventually blew them up. Okay, but guess what really skyrocketed them financially.

I don't know.

Merchandise. They go, yeah, one time we just realized, we just thought, why not put this? Put this up? Sold like thousands and hundreds of thousands of it, and they're like, overnight, we made millions.

We should do.

He said. The one moment when they started making millions was when they just thought, why not make merchandise for people to buy? Please? I go no, I'm sitting there crying, dude watching Paul American.

My question is, so on their YouTube channel before they joined forces, like.

They never really joined forces, but they always said, hey, I got two hundred million subs, I mean you got oh, I got one hundred and ninety four subs. Huh, And then they just do stupid stuff.

Like would they do the same stupid stuff or were they would like, Okay, I'm gonna do push ups, and he would put how many he got on his YouTube channel, and then the other brother would put how many he did on his and you had to watch both videos to see who won.

Now they would just each have their own angles. And I think one of the dudes girlfriends. They break up, and then the other brother dated the brothers x no. So then the conflict was just natural. So like, so do they like each other? Now there's God and then and they were really real with this. He would say, Dude, he's sitting here texting me about the fight, saying that it looks like it's gonna be stupid. I'm like, I don't need negativity. He would be. He would say, because

I don't have it.

We're so picky now with our quality of television. But I'm not even telling I'm not one of these people that are so righteous and believes in their shows. I don't care if you watch it or not. I watched one episode that was fine. No, I don't care. That's what I'm saying. I don't care if nobody watches White Lotus. I enjoy the show. I like watching it. I don't give a rip. I don't even recommend it to people.

But well the ones given having a baby, right yeah, I don't know which one that is. But we'll take a break. We'll be right back.

Ray. That was all over the place. I like, I kind of liked it. But anyway, my master's watching this weekend.

I guess I'll get a little bit in on Saturday, but we have a soccer game, we have a baseball game, so that'll be making a little difficult Sunday. I believe the calendar is wide open, and so Sunday when the leader's tee off, if it's a close, I just want it to be where there's three or four guys battling. I don't want it to be someone up by five. If someone's up by five strokes, I probably won't watch. Heck, no, like that's unwatchable. That's not fun, it's boring. They don't

Speaking to start to finish. Has there been in our lifetimes wire to wire winner at the Masters? No, it was one, but it's typically a tournament where if you lead it the first eight, you're not going to lead it the last Only five in history, five in history, one in our day and age Jordan Speed.

Obviously you were talking to kick off Kevin because he was telling me the same students, Yes, you said, he said, you and Ray looked at it. He said, you got the YouTube, looked it up, and you were talking. He goes, how crazy is that? In eighty whatever years, there's only been five or whatever? He said, But we got an email.

You ready, Yeah, yop?

Hey, coachers, been loving the pod lately since you've been to North Dakota and miy not. There's a trial going on about a murder that happened eighteen years ago. A roommate was murdered in her apartment, but lack of evidence made the case go cold. The other roommate was the main suspect, dude to our alleged toxic nature and inconsistent police statements for years. You can find it on Court TV if you're interested. It's called the Toxic Roommate Trial.

Thanks Mitch, and that trial they found out who did it. Really it was somebody from the Sore Loser's Nation. That's not true. What if we did our own investigating and it led to that, that wouldn't be good. Do we have a lot of listeners in North Dakota? Ethy, you're the one that went out to Eight Bears.

That was a great place.

Man.

I did meet some listeners and one of them got arrested that night.

I'm part of the nation, man.

I mean he was celebrating his twenty first birthday and he were playing blackjack. Next I got news in handcuffs and no idea what's up, coachers? I was listening to the Friday pod about the Chester Molester van and had

Smell you later. That is funny, That is, I didn't think anything could top a Chester Molester pickup. That'll take the cake, I think.

Can you imagine pulling up hey Porter pundies on the back smelling like ass?

Come on, I ain't getting the truck just to kids too. The Porter potties of smelly is plumbers. You don't want dad pulling up in that paint truck. Chester Molester truck, semi is probably pretty ba If dad just brings the top.

That would be pretty cool, yepe, Hey, guess who's back back again? Fellas and Ray, what up? So Catnip and cat Nip and I are booking a place a Placemaker spot in Nashville, MLK weekend and get just wanted to make sure that Nashville will be the location of Coaches Convention. Can we get a good to go on this? I want to book it now so we can get it locked in. Found a badass spot Ray was spot on

The silo it.

Holds up to eleven hundred people outside and we can fit two hundred easily inside, so the twenty people that show up will be easily able to fit. My brother also owns a place in Austin called Come and Take It Live if y'all'd rather use that. Also, what up to Buddy Glass and the wife? Me and Catnip live in San Marcus and I work in New Bronfuls, San Antonio. Let's get together Buddy and miss Buddy. That's all just

Bless be the fruit, Cat Dick, I think we just found our venue in San Marcus.

Hey, hey, Cat Dick, congratulation on four hundred and seventy five days sober dominic durand hopefully you're doing well, man, haven't heard from you? You hope everything's going well with you and your daily journey. That's it, that's all I got. I gotta go and watch the masters man.

A lot of the nation man, it's at times they have to get off the bottle.

That's good though.

Proud of you guys, I mean it to you. Yeah. Yeah, Once you know you're bigger than it, then you decide are you better without it? Do you like having a sip on a Saturday afternoon? It's up to you. But guys, get that help you need.

Congrats tall yeah, and good luck to you all your master's bets. Enjoy Augusta this weekend.

Guys.

It's the most could it be the most beautiful place on earth? DoD's been there, I've never been. It's it's pretty much the old Old Boys Club. If you're not part of the club, you don't get in.

Yeah, and they let a lady in. I think, No, did bones go to it one time? Didn't you go with John Legend? Yeah? He did, he did, he did. See. I don't think I can ever get into the Masters.

You can?

I enter the lottery every year? You do? Yeah? Why would I not? You would get off? Uh?

Yeah, that would be one of Oh you wouldn't. That'd be one of those things that it would just have to be a hey man.

Nope, because you had to work Thursday. Do you had to work Friday?

And we'd have to be one of those things that hey man, sorry, but this is the once in a lifetime shot.

I gotta go. Buddy from work sends out a company wide email one year, Hey guys, I got selected. I get to go to the Masters. So low Key brags to us and then says he's not gonna be at his cell phone or email for five days. Okay, awesome, Yeah, great man.

That's weird because we got a low I don't know if you got the low Key brag flex that we got the other day.

In our email. Where is it the March madness? Yeah?

A little weird. It says hello, haul. First, I'd like to say congrats to all the Florida Gators fans out there. We earn this hard work and dedication. We directly contributed to the Florida Gators winning.

Uh.

Also, sorry for not emailing right away the results of the company bracket, as I was in Santa Antonio to watch my boys cut down the nets. No need for that, No need for the brag about being there and letting us know you were at the event.

Must be nice taking that Friday and Monday off.

Yeah, must be nice to be able to travel to San Antonio watch your boys cut the nets down. And sorry I was slow getting out the results of the You just say, here are the results of the bracket.

Cool.

I suck, but I like the humble brag. Without further ado, Congratulations to Gator go figure for winning the first annual iHeart Nashville Bracket Challenge. The money will be.

Paid out shortly when I.

Get back to town, because you know where I was, San Antonio, celebrating with my fellow Gators.

And you already know the bracket he did. It was a chalky one, so he just picked all favorites.

Favorite well I mean it was very I mean, anybody that picked favorites did really well this year.

That's why Baser did the worst family bracket. My sister won by one pick. She beat me, and then Baser did terrible, which tells you picking cheerleaders and mascots.

Yeah, and she's near Kentucky. She likes Tennessee. It didn't work out for him. All right, everybody, have a great weekend. We'll see you on Monday.

It's that time man live from Augusta. Dude, I'll send that email out when we're on our vacation. Oh sorry, guys, I'm a Turks and Kekos out of pocket? What did I miss? Like, guys, we don't need the location. Send the people their money when they win. Nobody needs to know that you were right there when they cut down the nets. Guys, I'm going to the Masters. I got an unbelievable offer to go to the Masters. I will be there for five days. I'll be out of pocket.

That sounds about not right, but hey, man, cool.

Ray I would have been good to go. Bones would have approved it. Yeah right, dude, you're drunk. You're drunk, you'd never gotten off, But you don't know that. That's why don't even know. That's why I thought in the moment, Man, I'm an idiot. Why don't I do the lottery? Oh yeah, I can't ever take off for that. Oh yeah, I can't go to a Monday Night in San Antonio March Badness game. We just there's stuff we can't do. I don't know, man, I think that's one of those things we can do.

Man, But maybe I'm hey, I could be completely wrong.