All right, break it down.
If you ever have feelings that you just fonts Amy and Cat gotcha Cob and locking them brother ladies and felts.
We just follow the spirit where it's tell us O real stuff to the chill stuff and the m but Swayne, sometimes the best thing you can do it.
Just stop you feel things.
This is feeling things with Amy and Kat.
Happy Tuesday. Welcome to feeling things. I'm Amy, I'm Cat, and we have a little something special for everybody today. We've never done this before, never, never, first time. No, we have a hybrid situation fusion. Ah.
Yeah, we don't really know what.
We're calling it, but it's when it's like if Feeling of the day and Email of.
The Day had a baby.
That's what we're doing.
And we don't know how to combine the songs, so we're just going to sing them both. So get ready for our feeling of a day mixed with our Email of the day. Okay, the reason why our feeling of the day and our Email the day had a little baby is because we got this email from Autumn and she is responding to a couch talk. So that with sin in we already aired it from McKenzie. She's pregnant and she's just feeling a little like um, not as excited as she thought she would feel, and she was
feeling a little weird about that. And this has happened before too. It's not just with Autumn and McKenzie, but other people have emailed in to give advice or feedback or thoughts to other couch Talks things which couch Talks airs on Thursday.
This is feeling things we do. This is our big show.
Welcome to the Big Show on Tuesdays. And I love the emails that we get that are supporting our other listeners, and that for Kat and myself just helps it feel more like a community, which is what we're trying to build. We want y'all to all feel connected, even though you're listening in different places all over the world.
All over the world.
I was gonna say country, but then I feel like we do have one listener in Nigeria. Really, I think I saw that probably one in the UK, or we had yeah, we have Canada, we have UK, we have more obvious countries. But when I saw a listener in Nigeria, I was like, interesting.
Wait, could that just be like a listener from Oklahoma that traveled to Nigeria.
Yes likely Yes, maybe they were just there on a trip and they downloaded it, or this they moved there on their missionary or they're deployed somewhere in Africa worldwide. This a three or five? All right? So, uh, the feeling of the day is supported and it's because of this email we got from autumn.
So do you see how we just had.
A baby we merged? Here's the email that Auto sent in. Hey, Amy and kat I listened to the couch talks about McKenzie navigating feelings around a new pregnancy. I related to many of those feelings in her circumstances. I'm also a military family and a mom with a busy career. Something that helped me get through my fears early in pregnancy was the following quote, what's the best that could happen? My brain often jumps straight to the worst case scenarios and all the things.
That could go wrong.
That quote, which I guess is also a question, is a nice reminder that things can also go right. Love y'all, So what's the best that could happen? I love it, and I love that she sent that in for Mackenzie. And I love that we get to share it here on the big show and that we're all feeling supported. Hopefully Mackenzie hears that and she feels supported. I feel supported.
I feel supported.
Yeah, we all feel supported.
And this reminds me and made me think about how even in training as a therapist, we're taught to ask what's the worst that can happen? When somebody's struggling with something, we help them, Well, what's the worst that can happen? Like, let's go through that, versus framing their mind more towards the things that could go right. And that's something I've
had to work on as a therapist. Maybe in like twenty seventeen, I had a client who she was younger, maybe like sixteen seventeen, and she would come in every single week and she had a hard life. She had a really rough home situation, struggling in school with some things, struggling with some body image stuff. And every week when she would come in, I would ask her like, how
are these things going that she was struggling with? And it would always be really negative, and she would always be really solemn and very depressed, And I noticed myself getting frustrated as a therapist, which for me was a red flag of I'm supposed I have this positive regard for my clients and I shouldn't have this dread when I see a client on my schedule because she's not getting better or not getting sick of hearing what she's saying.
But I'm just like, oh, frustrated.
So I was like, Okay, what are you doing over and over and again that's not working and kind of how can you shift them? So one day she came in before I asked her like, how are things going? And we did our thing where I was like, how are things with your dad? And she was like, I hate them. I said, I'm not going to ask you about any of those things. I have a different question. She said, okay. I said, is anything going well for you?
Is there anything about your life that you like? And she kind of just like looked at me funny, and I was like, shit, okay and she was actually yes, and I said okay.
And she did a lot of art.
She was an artist, and a lot of things that we talked about she would ask to draw them or paint and so she said can I show you instead of tell you?
And I said okay.
So She got out my butcher paper and all like that art supplies, and she had me turn my back so I couldn't see it until she was done, so I couldn't be peeking. So I turned my back for like twenty minutes, and then she said, okay, I'm done, and I turned around and I still have this. I kept it this like mural. It was on like big butcher paper. It was this mural of this girl and then all of these things around her that she liked about herself, and I just kind of dropped.
My job kind of just dropped. I was like, what is this?
And then she started telling me about all these things. If I like this, and I like this, and this is going really well, and this is part of even there are even parts of her body which she was struggling with body image, and she had an eating disorder, and there are parts of her own body that I had no idea that she really liked. And so she told me all about it. And then I looked at her and I said, why have you never told me about any of.
This stuff in your life? And she.
Kind of paused. I wish I knew more about what she was thinking, but she just paused. And she said, well, because you've never asked me oh, And I.
Was like wow, yeah, I said, okay, you are right, I have never asked you about what you like about it. That was eye opening for me as a therapist.
I'll probably changed you.
Yes, I never asked her once what she liked about her life. I only focused on the things that weren't going well, and a lot of those things were out of her control, like she can't control her mom, she can't control her dad, she can't control people at school, versus what do you like? And what would happen if we started focusing on those things? And it made me think, yeah, the questions we ask are going to impact how we view things.
And where we go.
So rather than always asking, well, what's the worst that can happen, what's the best that could happen in this situation?
And I also just a remind her too of how we're interacting with people of like the questions we're asking them, because like, yeah, whatever y'all were focusing on in therapy, that was the version of her. You were gettings and you were starting to be like, oh, yeah, I'm kind of dreading this. So even in our relationships because Not all of us are therapists, right, most of us aren't.
But in our friendships or our partnerships or our work relationships, like what are we doing to kind of lead conversation and things we may be frustrated with when it comes to other people, it's like, oh, wait, how have we contributed to that? Yeah, by the questions we're asking.
Yeah, we get stuck in the same routine, the same stuff, and I still have to I love that that story is embedded in my brain forever because that still happens where I get stuck in kind of a cycle with a client or a friend or somebody, Like, wait a second, I keep doing the same thing. So part of this is on me. If I keep asking somebody the same question about the same thing that they don't have control over,
I'm probably going to keep getting the same answer. So if we shift star vision a little bit, this might still be going on. But other things are happening too, And it's not to like because I think sometimes bad, Yes, bad things are happening, and it's fair to be able to process that and feel that. But it's being able
to hold both of those things. I didn't change her relationship with her dad but we did spend more time focusing on the relationships in her life that were really good, and that shifted the way she felt walking around.
Mm hmm.
Yeah, it reminds me of a conversation I just had with my boyfriend. It's a little different, but it reminds me of it. So he was traveling and going to the airport and I was on the phone with him, and right when he got to where he parks and like takes the shuttle, he was like, oh.
The shuttle isn't here.
And then once the shuttle got there and he got to there, but he's like, oh my gosh, remind me to never travel on this day at this time again because it is just crazy. And then he's like, oh my god. Like it was like four things.
In a row.
And he's not a negative person, but I happened to be in a very like positive mood, and so I just I didn't want to be impacted by his negativeness. Which I can do that too. I mean I can rattle off four things that I'm annoyed about in a row. So it wasn't about me being better. It's just like, in that moment, I realized, like, whoa you're being that way, and I don't. I don't want to soak up any
of that type of energy, so let's reset. I was like, so, tell me, is there anything that's going right this morning, like before you're traveling?
And he was like, oh, well, I didn't feel like that stuff was really bad.
I said, I know it doesn't seem that way, but I'm over here with this different energy and you're just like ping ping ping ping, which I know you're getting ready to leave the country and this is a lot and it can be overwhelming, but let's can we focus on, like, just tell me something that's going right for you right now?
And then that.
Helped sort of reset us. And I would want him to do the same thing for me, like if I was the one noticing negative things around me, Like could he pause and say, okay, can you tell me something that's going right?
Is anything and there's a finesse to it?
Right?
It's a finesse.
A finesse.
Oh I like that word.
I don't know that I mean, because remember how I don't know that I've ever used finesse other than like, isn't that a hairspray finesse?
Is it?
Trust? Trust?
Finesse is that different? Maybe it's part of a tagline. Finesse means no, finesse like yeah, like a smoothness to it. There's a dance to it. There's a way to do it. It's got to be a tagline for a hair product. I don't know, okay, but there's a finesse.
I like it.
I'm going to start using it.
It start word of the day.
Shannon will find us the definition.
Also, I want to know what commercial it's been in.
But this, but this is reminding me how I think it was it your kids or who who was it Adeline that told you that?
You asked the question, what does this make possible? Too fast? Oh?
Adeline ads to share both of them together.
Yeah. So this is where the finesse comes in.
Where we have space for the frustration, and we have space for the things that are going wrong, and we are mindful to not let somebody linger there too long. We're helping them see the other side, versus saying don't look at that. Okay, I'm gonna help you see both versus don't look at that.
Guess what finesse Finish and strengthen Extra Hold Hairspray nine nine on.
Amazon something brand finesse finish.
I don't know, Yeah it is finesse.
Also, is that how you spell finess because it looks like finis.
Yeah, but I have to say finesse in like soccer, We're like, oh, they had a finesse to it, like when you did like a really cool move, like and it was like smooth, Like oh.
Oh, this is gonna be my new word. You know how dates are my new food.
Like those dates had a finesse to them in my salade.
Yeah, I'm just gonna start using it all the time, like dates, I want dates and everything.
I love dates.
And now I feel like I'm going to fall in love with the word finess.
I have a challenge for you, Okay, on the Bobby Bones Show.
You should have to work in finesse once, no problem, in the next twice in the next week.
How about that. Yeah, see if somebody picks up of like you've said that twice.
So my boyfriend's son gave me that challenge on the Bobby Bone Show once because he listens on his way to school and he's twelve, and he was like, and you do just say the word donut. And I was like, Okay, well, we'll see, because Bobby was doing the news and so I'm like, how am I going to work donut into the news? And I feel like maybe. Then Bobby brought up some story about UFOs or some identify unidentified objects aliens like something with the government, and I'm like, how
in the world am I gonna work in donut? And I just remember saying something like, well, do we have the the whole picture, like the whole, like the whole shebang, the whole donut, because you know, you know, there's the full donut and then you have the cutout donut and that's how you get the donut hole.
We just have the donut hole? Or do we have the whole donut?
Yeah, the whole shebang? I think, I go, do we have the whole donut? Is this the whole donut?
The whole shebang?
And that was the way that I worked at it, and he thought it was the coolest thing ever.
Like he's on his way to school and he's like, she just doesn't do that, like this is crazy, which speaking of my boyfriend, you know how that reminds me because Autumn was talking about the Couch Talk's email from Mackenzie and It was on that episode that I called my boyfriend my husband.
How could we forget?
Yeah, and that was cool.
It's just a little fruity Fridian slip for Fredian Freudian.
It's not like you're saying fruity.
Freudianian Freudian Fredian slip.
Yep.
And it has been haunting me ever since.
So it made a funny you know, real about it that we put on social at Feeling Things podcast. If you're not already following, follow TikTok Instagram, I'll subscribe, like subscribe, follow, reshare, save, comment, save, save, save our posts. Apparently saving posts helps engagement because that.
Know, that means people really like this.
I want to come back to it, saving and sharing, like if you share it to your stories.
Share it to her friend, share it too. Yeah, that's what I started doing.
You know they did that. I went in, I posted something and I started sending it out to everybody we know, and I was like, my sister. But it worked because my sister went to Our Feeling Things and she commented, and I don't know that she comments that often, but because I put it straight into her DMS, she was like, ah, yeah, I'm gonna go leave a comment I sent it to.
But you didn't say anything to people when you did it, because I I just smired it off.
Okay, I did that this morning.
I sent it to one of my friends and I texted her, you can ignore that DM I sent you, and she goes, oh, dang it.
I thought I was special when you were setting I should have just let her.
Let it be, okay, just start firing it off to all your people. I sent it to your husband, send it to my boyfriend, like ha, look at this reel when I called you my husband, because then the.
The caption on it was, uh, what was you soft launch?
Husband?
Yeah, just saft launched my marriage.
He doesn't know it yet, So what did he think of it?
He thought it was hilarious.
Okay, he thought it was funny, Thank goodness. But when I say it is haunting me, it's like his dad sent me a text and he was like, your quote unquote husband, just sent me the video because you know, also in the video we talked about wait to Worry WTW, which was an acronym or saying from his dad, and so he thought sharing his dad would be special, and of course his dad loved it. But his dad was like, oh, Alex sent me this. He was like, your husband sent it.
And then you saw some guy at the gym that also said something and then which you can tell that story.
So I've been going to the gym with this guy for probably nine months and we've said high and stuff to each other, but never introduced each other.
So thank you. You helped me make a friend.
He came up to me, he was like, oh my gosh, you came up on my Instagram and I wanted to tell you. He was like, I don't know Amy, but I know her husband because he's a great guy.
And I was like, yeah, yeah, So it turns out, yes, they do know each other and the kids know each other. And then my boyfriend got a text from one of his neighbors that said, are you getting married?
Stop it?
Yes, and I was like, make it stop, stop stop. So he really thought, who knows what the neighbors saw or what that because sometimes you're just scrolling real quick and it could say be like my face soft launch of my marriage, Like he doesn't know yet, and maybe they don't. I don't know, do they get it? Did they not understand what really happened? And then they're texting him are you getting married? Are you getting engaged? And
I said, well, what did you reply? He goes, I just sent back no, And I was like, well, what do.
You mean by no? We're not engaged?
Right? I know it was a very normal answer, but somehow I was offended by it.
You wanted him to be like, not yet, right, Yeah, yeah, that makes sense. Do you remember you might not remember this when early when Patrick and I were dating, he posted it was like maybe the first picture he posted of me, I think it was, and I had a ring on my ring finger and he posted it and he got multiple people, including his cousin, called him and asked, are you engaged? I was like, first of all, if that was our engagement post, we would have some issues.
I think we're a house of cards or something.
Yes you do. I'm like, oh my gosh, that never will wear I never wore a ring on that finger. Point.
Did he just reply no?
I think he just like he no, he said, he said no, but we're looking into it.
I'm just kidding. I was dating for like three months.
Maybe Okay, well I look it's fine. He just answered no straight.
To the point.
Gosh, no, finesse about him at all. The definition of finesse to do something in a subtle and delicate manner, intricate and refined delicacy finesse.
So if somebody does something really smooth, be like, oh I like that finesse.
Yeah, straight, like it's you know, like straight fire, that's straight. You know, we made sick a thing.
What if we make finesse?
So I wonder if we start saying finess and you start saying around your boyfriend's kids, I must just said your husband's kids. You say it around your boyfriend's kids, if they'll be like, oh that sounds kind of cool. They bring it to school, we get the whole town saying it, okay.
Oh actually yeah, the whole town, the whole world.
Have you ever said it had a saying that you started saying and then you heard other people started saying it, And you're.
Like, wait, I think I started that?
No, no, have you?
Yeah?
But I don't think I did, Like I think I probably heard it.
I don't want to put money on that you didn't Oh sorry, I had no finesse with that, But what was the saying?
I don't know.
There's been multiple things, and I'm like, wait, I said that. Now everybody's saying it.
Well, you got me saying sick.
Yeah, but I know I didn't start that. I'll think of it because I know.
If you remember what it was, then.
I'm nervous right now. I feel like I'm put on the spot.
Okay, circle, because I definitely want to know.
Okay, but okay, Also I want people to hear me saying I don't think I really did start it.
Just but you haven't even said what it is, so you don't have to clarify. It's not like you're taking credit for anything. You can said what it is. You're like, for the record. I just don't want to, you know, act like I'm taking credit for this, saying that I haven't even said yet because I don't remember what it is.
I get you heart be misunderstood.
Yeah, yeah, don't worry.
Was it?
What are some sayings like I.
Don't even know things that I say.
It's a problem, like no, cap okay, I didn't start that, nor do I say it. Dope, don't say that fire fireflame? I say fireflame?
What is that?
Like?
If something's sick? Sometimes I'll say that's fireflame.
Who says that?
Well, two of my friends started saying it too, and then we made it our group chat name.
But because is that the emojia you know when people send a fireflame?
Yeah, well I just call it fire button.
Well, so then I say no fireflame because that's the emoji, is the fireflame.
So there's fire.
What if we say, like, please start saying fire flames like a match? Cool because that's like strike a match fire. Yeah, that's straight strike a match because it's about to be straight fire.
That's a lighter lit. A litle lit lit was one.
I know, but I didn't start that.
Yeah, okay, I don't have anything. I'm like trying to think of more cool saying that I've gotten nothing. Okay, I have like you know, back in the day, we would say like psych like when I was in junior high.
That cycles through because that started we started saying that when I was in high school.
And I, eh, anyways, eh, I cauld do that. Yes you do that? People who know no somebody. Girls who get it get it, and girls who don't don't.
I don't get that club anyway.
That is mean girl.
Ash probably was.
It was like and you did it as you like curled your hair.
You go anyways, that feels mean I like it.
I don't know that. I don't.
I think I had it done to me a lot. It was when I went to It was in sixth grade. I went to Fullmore.
Did you say that when like somebody you were tired of what they were saying and you're like, anyways.
No, I just said I didn't really say it, Okay, Max, it was just popular at my school. Okay, we had no finex anyways. Okay, I have a little some something, and then I know you have a little some something like I'm going to share things we can say to ourselves to feel calm.
Before we go to sleep.
Okay, And I'm very very very very very very excited about you telling your thing because we have had air bats on our schedule on our Google doc for weeks now. If we haven't gotten to it for whatever reason, I don't know why, we just haven't gotten to it. And I want to know all that airbats because I love baths. I love a forest bath, you know. I love cold plunge baths. I like warm plunge baths, like hot baths, cold bats.
So stay tuned, don't stop listening now, because we're going to say that a sound bats.
I love a sound bath.
What have you heard of air baths? I haven't.
That's why I'm eager for you to tell me about it. So I'm gonna knock mine out real quick because we can get tears. So these are things that we should be saying to ourselves before we sleep. I saw this list thought it could be helpful if you're having trouble falling asleep. Okay, so you lay down, picture it.
First step is still lay down, first.
Up, lay down? Although, can I share something about how I've been sleeping sitting up?
Elevated? How elevated?
Okay, Well, I have a thing that I got through work from mattress firm at like like a hospital bed.
So is it very thankful to sides?
So your partner could be a different.
No, it's the whole. We're all together.
I think way back when've been in a whole, we had the whole. We had the two different sides. He maybe got that in the divorces. So anyways, I just had the regular. However, like if you don't have that, or you go to a hotel, but you can stack your pillows and kind of just sleep a little bit elevated, and I feel like my face. I've been waking up less puffy when I'm sleeping elevated, okay, and something, it's
like better about circulation. And even if you can raise your feet up a little bit, like it's like good for the the blood from your feet to go towards your abs and the blood from your head to go down towards your ebs. You know. So you're almost like at this. It's like zero gravity whatever they call zero google it.
I thought zero gravity was like when you're in space.
No, but it's what they call It's like an elevated state of like your hips are at one hundred and twenty degree angle or something.
This is getting too complicated.
Well sorry, I'm easy too. This is I've gone on a drink.
You have to be one hundred and twenty degrees elevated in zero gravity, which you go to space to sleep.
Now okay, Well I was originally telling you that, and then my ADHD brain took us on a journey to zero gravity sleeping, which is a thing.
Okay, So don't hate I'm.
Not hating you. I just feel I feel.
Like you've been taken down a rabbit hole.
I feel overwhelmed. Now I want to feel underwhelmed with my sleep. I want to feel whelmed.
Okay, well that was just a side note.
Okay, like whatever, sleep elevated, don't sleep elevated, no pressure.
Sleep under your bed.
Yeah, okay, back to the original feeling of calm. This is what you're gonna say to yourself.
Okay? Is this one long mantra or different things?
Pick which ones you need, okay, or write them all down.
Okay.
I released the day with gratitude. I don't need all the answers tonight. I am proud of how far I've come. I did my best today and that's enough. I forgive myself and others asterisk, because like you may be heaven forgiven the others. I am safe.
You can choose your own adventure.
There, I added the asterisk.
You were like, I forget myself, but not them. Yeah yet yet.
I am safe to let go. I will wake up with greater clarity. I can start again tomorrow. I am ready to drift into peace now. I don't want to throw you. I know I just went over that list. I'm in a detour real quick because I just thought of something else that I used to do that I stopped doing, and I don't know.
Why I stopped about sleeping.
I used to listen to like.
Sleep talk down audio on YouTube from Jason Stevenson. Do you remember telling you about him? He has an accent. I don't know where he's from. Maybe Australia.
Is just the guy that says the money one.
Oh no, that's something that's vibrations, that's subliminal that I ast to. I can't really hear the person saying it, but I'm listening to like bees buzzing, and then underneath they're going, you are good with money. Circulating money brings you towards You're responsible for large sum of money, and you know what to do with it.
You handle money with ease. Yeah, I handle money with e That's that's a different.
Those are my subliminals that help me with my finances because money used to always stress me out.
So that's what I do to stay calm with.
You are a money magnet.
That's the one that I need.
Yeah, give me five hundred dollars right now. Well, no you're not.
I mean, you're not talking to anybody else.
I know, but the name it would help me ask for it better.
But it's like imagine you're just but I don't hear that. I mean it's under there because towards the end you can kind of hear it because the maybe the ocean's crashing or the bees buzzing or the birds chirping, they sort of die out and then you hear the But they're talking Relie really fast. It looks like a recorded it's on fast feed, and it's like you are a money magnet. You're really good when you attract money, and money comes too easily, and people just want to give
you money. It's like that, but you're hearing it under Who gave you this idea? I came across it on Instagram. Cry Okat came across some posts that she saw, and then my cousin has talked to me about subliminals before. And then I went to this one link that the person posted about and then I clicked on the link and I was like, okay, I'll get that app. So I get the app and then I just listened to it.
Wait a second, did you have to pay for a subscription?
I pay for it, not a lot, though you're good with money.
You will pay twenty nine ninety nine a month to have this subliminal message.
That there's a that's the money one. I can listen to nobody.
It is hilarious.
You're like, oh so funny.
I know, I know, I'm a sucker who knows if these even work. Maybe we should make our own, like I do it. Yes, I do it morning and do it, and I try to do it when I'm going to sleep, when I'm waking up, because your your brain is in like I don't know, the state delta maybe or something, which is good at receiving subliminals because you have different
wavelengths where you're more susceptible to absorb. Okay, okay, so because on a subconscious level, like I had convinced myself that I was horrible with money, and now on a subconscious level, I'm I'm subliminally telling myself or whoever this lady is that recorded these things really fast, she totally you're really good at mone You're making mad.
What if in it? You don't know what they're like? You will give me all of.
Your mind, but I'm not.
I haven't given her anything else, like I'm not giving any other money. Like I also listened to the your creative genius, there's a creative genius, aren't really creative though, thank you. I almost didn't accept that compliment. But I am working on that. So she'd be like, you know, you you have ideas they are flowing out of you or an idea.
I'm an idea magnet.
Okay, so subliminals back to that. Jason Stevenson is different. He does sleep talk down videos works much as for his free and he's got like millions of lessons, sort of like us. We're millions of views on YouTube.
We're the same.
So Jason Stevenson and he just talks down. It's like a sleep it's like a talking that's talking you down to go to sleep. So I think they're called sleep talk down.
Okay, then you stopped doing it because you didn't need it.
Don't know. I guess I was getting better, but I was really into it for a while, probably because I replaced it with my subliminals. You know.
Yeah, but this is nice. You can just say these instead of have your sleep talk down. Yeah, you could just say this to yourself. I release the day with gratitude.
I don't need all the answers right now.
That's my favorite one.
I know that one's good for me because you know, one thing I was wearing on therapy for sure late last year. Was trying to figure everything out, and my therapist kept saying, what if there's nothing to figure out?
And I'm like, are you kidding me?
Who do you think you are?
There's so much to figure out. I have to figure out what How are you doing with that?
Now?
Better?
Okay?
I got better with that after my ketamine sort of release some of that, I mean obviously, and then talking through it with her afterwards, and then you know, that helps the way to worry also helps that in my relationship, like there's nothing to figure out. Wtw Yeah, I don't need all the answers tonight tomorrow.
That's a different story.
Okay, real quick before we get into air bathing, Shannon found us some things about sleeping elevated. Sleeping with an elevated head, such as using an extra pillow or a wedge, can be beneficial for your face, particularly and reducing puffiness and improving skin health. Elevating your head helps reduce fluid build up, which can lead to morning puffiness, especially around
the eyes. Boom, sick, take it, and subliminals. You're generally more susceptible to subliminal messages when your brain isn't actively engaged in demanding tasks, allowing it to filter and process subliminal stimuli more easily.
Wait, so you shouldn't be doing things when you listen to your subliminals. You should like be lying down. Yeah, well you don't, do you do that?
Kat?
What I just told you when I listened to my subliminals? When do I listen to my subliminals?
I thought you did it while you were like doing dishes or something. No, were you lying down?
I just said I listened to it before I go to bed and when I wake up, because my brain.
Is still in Like, I'm sorry, Delta, It's not that I wasn't listening, It's just that I wasn't paying attention.
I have compassion for your kind of brain because I too have the brain that you have, which I could easily do that same exact thing to you, which is I think one of the beautiful things about our friendship is because we have similar brains. So I'm not even offended.
It's also you've given me a lot of grace. I've forgotten what day your birthday is for the past five years. Yeah, it's in my calendar. It's just in my calendar. It's the wrong day. And you think, after the first year that I said happy birthday and the wrong day, I would have changed it. But guess what still been there on the wrong day.
Yours is December fourth. It's fine.
Yours is the nineteenth eighteen. My calendar on the seventeenth, so I knew it wasn't the seventeenth. It's okay.
My best friend from high school. From high school, so I've been friends with her since we were thirteen, and I still get the days flipped, and it's crazy.
Why can you remember mine? Then I don't know. It's jay Zy's birthday.
Too, probably, and Cryocats is December tenth. I don't know, Yeah, thirteenth of December.
Yeah, oh, I don't like her. Shannon's birthday is right after my birthday. No, after your birthday, it's after yours, right, it's four.
I knew that.
Yeah, hers seventeenth.
Okay.
So yeah, now we've got everybody in the room. Birthdays are covered, listeners are informed, they know. But I will say this because I have had friends where I have missed their birthday and I don't even think I understood how my brain worked around birthdays. And I would carry a lot of shame and guilt, and I felt terrible, but I was like, how did I just go this whole day? Now I have had to try to implement
things like calendar. Shannon helps me, like all the things like and I still will mess up and get things wrong, but as an adult, I try now now that I'm an aware adult, I've been an adult for a while, but with my ADHD, part of my awareness is like making sure that we've got our tools in place. That said, I still will mess up. But before I had a calendar, which was not that long ago, I do not like calendars.
I hated calendar sometimes. Let's say this was probably twenty eighteen, I forgot a friend's birthday and I felt terrible and I also did not understand my brain, nor did she, and it just did not go well. And it's something that came up even later, remember later in the day, Yeah, in the evening, and and then I immediately sent a gift.
And you had already talked to her that day, Bil, Yeah, yeah, it's some form of communication.
And it just was I when I was in bed and I sat up and realized it, like I was like, oh, oh my god, I'm a horrible human.
I don't think we can use our.
Our ADHD people.
We can't just use it as an excuse. But also I think that, like, if you have a friend that has ADHD and that were to happen, like, don't take it personally, because yeah, it's not.
An excuse, but it's not a reason.
To question your friendship, right, And that's not a reflection on how much I care about you exactly. Interest is part of my brain and I need to work on that better. I did that to my mom in college. I I'll never forget this. I called her because I really needed a pair of new shoes because I had formal that night on her I called her and I said, no, I can't find any shoes to wear with my dress. So I don't have any money, and almost probably I'm sure. She said, like, you can go get some I'll put
some money on your account. She was so nice. And then maybe four hours later, I was like, oh, it's my mom's birthday, April twenty third. I knew when her birthday was, I just didn't know it's April twenty third, And so I caught her and I said, Mom, I'm so sorry, happy birthday, and she said, it's okay, you were just worried about your shoes.
I was like, oh, yeah.
Yeah, I was. I also forgot my dad's birthday I think last year.
But it's but I guess it's not a self absorbed thing.
Well, it's like I'll tell her happy birthday later, and then you cause you like, see it too early in the morning, and then you forget and you put it later, and then it's too late, and then like.
Well, now you can schedule texts.
What did I know this? Did you already tell me this?
I don't think so.
I knew you could schedule emails, you can schedule text now.
Okay, I'm got to just schedule text for all the birthdays the next year.
Sick, sick, fire, the neess or something like that. Yeah.
So, well, you know, we did went down a few rabbit holes there air baths.
Okay.
So I was reading an article about I think I was talking about embracing your uniqueness or your quirks. I didn't get through much of the article because I was stopped in my tracks when they brought up Benjamin Franklin and his quirks. Do you know much about him?
I mean, he found electricity and bifocals.
Pretty sure.
Apparently he was a really quirky, interesting guy, and which makes sense because if he did all these like inventions, he had to be a little He was a progressive thinker.
I guess like us.
Just like us, we invent words, saying sphrases, they go viral.
And he did something called air bathing, and I was like, what is air bathing? So I looked they just like mentioned his air bass as if like everybody knew that Benjamin Franklin took air baths and what they were, so obviously you think of them and you're like, he's probably basking in the air. Well, know what he would do, is he for like an hour and a half or
so in the morning. The first thing he would do, or one of the first things he would do, is go into a room, open the windows, get completely nude and bathe the air. And he thought it was literally cleansing. He said it was more cleansing than actual baths.
Okay, Benjamin, his air bathing is not.
He said, cleaner than a bath, he said, I mean maybe back then he would advocate for air baths, a practice where he would sit naked in a room with open windows, to expose his.
Body to fresh air.
He believed this practice, which he referred to as bracing or a tonic bath, was beneficial for his health and helped him maintain good health. He liked to practice with cool morning air to energize himself and love the warm afternoon sun to relax.
Okay, so I get that. I mean, so he's a little bit of ahead of his time. Yeah, oh yeah, because we do stuff like well, because it's kind of like a cold plunge, right, there are probably benefits to it. But the thing that got me is he said it says Franklin preferred air baths to actual water baths, believing they were a more effective and agreeable way to cleanse the body. That's where I like, Yeah, soap like maybe cleansing mentally because you can get still and clear and calm.
But like, but what was the like hygiene back then? You know, I don't think they had the best hygiene, right, So maybe they just weren't up on the times of soap and water was probably more of a harded resource.
To get I think about that when I like, when I was watching Gilded Age, you know, did you watch that?
No, you've talked about it before. So good. You watched when is the Gilded.
Age late eighteen hundreds?
When was Benjamin Franklin alive?
Shannon, That's one of those things.
I know that Thomas Edison was in the Gilded Age, Like he invented the light bulb around then, So I don't know if the light bulb and electricity.
Came at the same ish.
Because Benjamin was the kite with the lightning, yes, right, and the bifocal and bifocals.
So we'll figure out seventeen hundreds.
Oh wow, so he's Wow. He lived till eighty four, so maybe he's onto something. Oh my god, that's old for back then.
Maybe he was lucky sort no, I mean.
Maybe he's his air baths, like he probably did his life better care.
He probably was doing things that were really good for your men going outside's understand. Oh, while I was gonna say, he probably was doing things that were really good for his mental health that impact his overall health. And he didn't even know it, like if he went outside and I mean now it's like, duh, the sun helps our health.
But he was and that's hard for us to do now. He was getting feuish here. Yeah, he naked he was getting air baths. The wind was just cleansing his whole buddy.
Well in the so the Gilded Age was about one hundred years after he died. And they had these beautiful dresses, you know, and they're like corsets and they're all what's under the dress the like really the the white stuff that like makes a tool, Oh, thank you, the tool, just.
Say it like you would say a hammer tool tool. Yeah, okay, So.
That stuff under their dress that's white and fluffy.
All that I'm trying to say is when it comes to hygiene, and they would it would be so hot out and they have on these dresses. Like what did they do to smell? Like did they have do you wonder? I mean, I use all natural deodas, so maybe that's what they were doing. Did they do coconut oil and you know vanilla?
What's that?
Some essential oil with a little baking wait.
A second, or soda? I never thought about that, well we were, Yeah.
I don't.
I did. When I watch the show, I'm like, well, they've got to be so hot, and I wonder if they smell, and then they'll start like making out and then do it and I'm like, oh, what am I doing.
Also, if it was normal, then they probably would be like, oh, it's the smell, that's what people smell like.
Oh, they would use okay, Shannon to the rescue. In the seventeenth centuries, people use variety of fragrant materials to smell good, floral sense like roses, orange blossoms, jasmine, as well as musky sense. Potpourrie was also popular for homes and who they had gumback then perfumed gloves. Interesting do you put gloves on and then to stick your gloves under your arms?
But also I see here Shannon's helping us out in multiple different ways.
Bats where we're for the rich.
Bathing was for the availabity of water depending on your social standing. So I don't know what Benjamin's social standing was. I would assume it would have been high. He could have been bathing. Maybe he was saving the baths for the other people.
Yeah, Oh my gosh, they used to bathe me. We're bathing too much. That's what my boyfriend says, I shower too much.
I don't.
I think he said it's bad for my skin, well, my microbiome.
I like to feel clean.
Yeah, same, I'll incorporate an air bath into my routine.
But also like depending on where can you we could just open all the windows in my home and get naked.
People can see through my windows.
I don't know.
I picture Benjamin. He's probably on like a little like house on a hill. No one's bothering him, Like, yeah, neighbors right next door.
That's Benjamin. He's air bathing, don't mind him.
Yeah, well, air bats we did it. The more you got it, now we cross that off. Every y'all try it out. Let us know, but don't get busted for like decent. What'ssure?
You could just sit in a bathing suit.
No, it has to be air baby to get it all through the orifices. Some of this is making me think of a story about cryocat which we need to get her a mic so that she could speak on it, so she doesn't have it. I'm just gonna throw this out there for listeners in case any of them have had this experience.
And they know, like maybe what could be going on.
But she's waking up smelling weird, like this never happened o before. Like she could take a shower and go to bed and in the morning she'll wake up and she smells like Indian food, not even bo Indian food.
Is there Indian food in her bath?
That's what I said, Or like maybe in her water shower like her neighbors.
Are they cooking?
No?
Does that have to do with some of the supplements you're taking?
She thinks maybe, But I don't know if anybody else has had this experience, just let us know. She thinks it could potentially be too much testosterone or stress, like any just has anybody else had an issue where they wake up suddenly out of nowhere, smelling like Indian food and they haven't eaten in any food, same diet all the time she stacked her meals. But okay, maybe it could be certain pepsil. Maybe it's on We don't know.
I wish she was still having this problem because then we could have her air bathe and see if it helped.
Yeah, because she would do.
That too much, soap, No problem there, all right?
Kat?
Where can people find us?
On Instagram at you need it not you need therapy? I keep doing that, that's okay? On Instagram at Feeling Things podcast.
Yes, and on YouTube TikTok all the things, and we hope that you will email us. Hey, there at Feelingthings podcast dot com and you can call and leave us a voicemail eight seven seven two oh seven two oh seven seven. All this stuff is in the show notes as well. And lastly, have the day you need to have.
Bye Bye,