#178 Wedding Etiquette and Protocol
Episode description
Julian Leaver joins us today to talk wedding etiquette and answer some burning questions about the best way to plan, budget, and more.
Wedding couples usually face their biggest challenge immediately after the excitement of their actual engagement wears off. They now know what needs to be done, but the how is not as certain. Julian Leaver’s expertise is in applying practical techniques to the basic tasks laid out for most couples on their standard wedding checklist.
Julian’s background in the wedding world gives him the perfect breadth of experience.
Hosted by The Dapper Diplomat is Julian’s medium for providing the skills that wedding couples need in-between the checklist and the chapel. He also speaks to the event community and conducts workshops for some of the nation’s finest brands to elevate communication, dining, business and social skills.
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Big Takeaways
Most of the time, people overthink the guest list! There are so many factors that play into the guest list, there is no 100% right answer. When things are getting crazy and confusing, return to the two of you (couple). It is your wedding, no one else’s.
You should tip. Julian’s advice is you should only tip vendors who are present on the day and remain the entire time. The drivers should be tipped if they are not already tipped. Hair and make-up should be tipped. You can use tipping to be proactive. Tipping the wait staff on the front side can be quite a different experience than tipping them at the end. For the hotel staff, gratuity is typically already included.
To invite children or to not invite them? This is a spot where everyone has an opinion. The standard, with children vs none, is the invitation. If you are planning to not invite children, you should preemptively tell your guests so they understand where you’re coming from. You’ll have an opportunity to explain the factors to them. Always do this in person!
Don’t overthink the registry. It’s your wedding. Make the decision, move on, and don’t worry.
When it comes to seating charts with divorced parents, complicated situations, have an in person conversation. It’s hard, but it will relieve the stress that can easily build when it goes untouched. Remember your guests are adults. Your parents are grown adults. It’s easy to revert to the role of child parent. But remember it is an adult to adult conversation.
Make sure that you build in buffer time. It’s easy to get wrapped up in the timeline, and then you can miss the real magical moments in the in betweens.
Links we referenced
www.instagram.com/dapperdiplomat
www.instagram.com/julianleaver
zola.com/bigwedding and promo code SAVE50
Quotes
“The guiding principle here is if you would have them to your house for dinner, they can be invited to the wedding. If you wouldn’t host them at your house, then why are they on the list?” - Julian
“I am a huge advocate for not writing on anything, ‘adult only reception.’” - Julian
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The Big Wedding Planning Podcast is…
Hosted and produced by Michelle Martinez
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