The Underrated Virtue: A Comprehensive Discussion on Humility, Leadership and Servitude

It was really became an issue of perseverance more than intelligence , because there's so many people that they're called ABDs all but dissertations Nice and there's a lot of people , unfortunately , that just run out of steam or money or endurance or something , and I think that's part of what we're about here in the Biblical Leadership Show is to encourage people ,

because endurance , perseverance , is such an important part of life and there's so many things we can miss out on in life the blessings of life if we quit before we're finished .

It's mentioned many times in leadership and if you're new to our show , what we do is we talk how to blend the Biblical and the leadership together and sort of time in together with some different examples , some of our life stories , and then we throw some dad jokes in yes , of course we have dad jokes . People are always asking us about our dad jokes .

Why do you do our dad jokes ? Because we want to do our dad jokes and we like dad jokes and that makes us smile and the world needs more smiles . And if you guys aren't smiling , at least we are , and that's . That's exactly right .

During that time I grew up in Albuquerque , I went to Jackson Junior .

You know , you look at humility today it's still . There's a lot of people that represent humility in the leadership and the business world .

I you know there's a lot of different things out there , but I think that a lot of people get confused about humility , you know , and tying in and how we tie it into leadership in the Bible and what are we gonna talk about today basically ?

And certain Christian denominations , when the priests are or go through ordination process for their ordination I didn't do this , I was kneeling when I was ordained by the bishop but in certain denominations they actually lie faced down on the front of the chapel or the sanctuary or whatever , in order to represent the being humble and being a servant before God , and

that's their tradition and it's been going on for many , many years and so but that's part of the origin of the word is to be humble and to let's just say it's not a false humility .

But we are showing by example that the world does not revolve around us , right , and that our focus is not on ourself , it's on others . And so part of being humble is having a good perspective of life and seeing the value and importance of other people , other ideas , even though you might not agree with them .

But you can have a conversation with people without , let's just say , being mean about it or looking down on somebody or thinking you're better than them or your ideas are right and they're wrong . So I think being humble is such a value concept for everyday life , especially as a leader .

You know , surround yourself with people are smarter than you , treat them really good and you know everything will come together . When you don't have the answers , tell them you don't have the answers .

I mean you don't have to be all knowing and you know , if you take a step back and look at that and look at the way you treat people , you know we were talking before the show . You know one of the big things I try to do with my kids is treat them . You know humility , just because I try to give them everything that I can , you know .

But at the same time I tell them that this isn't normal . If I buy them you know big Robux gift card I bought them one this week I'm like I'm buying this because I love you and you did some chores and all this stuff . It isn't because you asked for it . You know there's things that go to it .

So I try to keep them in check and I do the same for me as a leader as well .

And so recognizing our , the reality of our life before God , recognizing that we don't have it all together , that our spirits are empty , there is an emptiness there without God and there's no way to fill that emptiness except for God . And people try to fill that with all kinds of things .

But but recognizing our life situation , where we are spiritually , where we are as a human being , I think is part of the beginning of being humble .

if you're humble , right , because if you're on the right path and you're doing things , and you're blessed and you're saying prayers and you're getting the answers that you're looking for , there's a certain point where you have to be a little bit humble because you're manifesting things , you're doing things , you're God's answer in some of your prayers and at some point

you've got to . You know , take a step back and not be bragging about things and showing people up . I mean I'm very good , I think , about incorporating everybody into the plan . I mean I don't see , you know , being in the construction business , I've got everybody .

You know I deal with the Uber rich all the way down to , you know , my guys and we're across the board . So I feel that I'm very humble the way I treat everybody . I treat my clients the same way I treat , you know , some of the guys working for me and you know , for me that's a big characteristic that I've worked on over the years .

You know , just to make sure that I look at everybody the same , you know , sort of like when I get starstruck in Hollywood , I mean my big thing is not to take a picture with them , it's just shake their hand . I just want us to shake their hands and say you know , thank you for making a difference in the world or whatever , depending on who it is .

But that's what I try to do , is I stay humble and I have checkpoints in to make sure that I'm doing that .

Hence , in the soul in which the virtue does not exist , there cannot be any other virtue except in mere appearance . So he's like he said , being humble is the foundation of all the other virtues , and if there's no humility there , then everything else is just a show . It's just , you know , window dressing , it's not real .

And so for him and considering if you ever , if you don't know about his life , I encourage you to just Google it and read about his life what an amazing turnaround he had because of his relationship with God , and he became one of the most well-known figures in Christian history just because of part of it , because of his humility and his recognition that he

really needed God in his life to make it complete . And so that was just an incredible statement , and he lived that out . And humility is one of those things that you can teach it , but you have to . It's like it's caught , it's not just taught .

So if you're trying to teach it to your children or do an example of that to your employees , then you have to model that , and that's not always easy to do , especially if you come into a difficult situation .

We're a work in progress and , from a leader standpoint , humility is emitting what you're . You know looking at what your strengths are , but emitting that you have weaknesses and you know , being knowledgeable , that you're working on things You're you know , I was going to say diamond or rough , but you know I was going to come up with something fun .

I could tie a dad joke in there , but . I couldn't do it off the top of my head real fast , right so . But I mean that's one of the things . You've got to look at the strengths , weaknesses . How are you presenting yourself , do you know ? I always ask people . What do people come up and ask you for ?

The things that are people are coming and asking you for they see as your strengths . You know , if I'm asking you for biblical advice , I might probably see you as a person that knows what you're talking about .

If I'm going to come up and ask you how to , you know , change or change a breathe when you're doing a triathlon , well , you might be an expert at it , but you know we got other experts , you know , just so Dr Posey , he does . He's on this triathlon thing .

So I just remember years ago we were in I was in a church . We had a about a million dollar building project that we were adding onto our building .

We had a meeting of the building committee and we were talking with architect and and different things and budgets and those kinds of as a builder , you know exactly what I'm talking about and and there was I don't know how many people in this room , maybe 10 or 12 .

And one one particular man I won't say his name , but one particular man just disagreed with all of us about the decision that we were making and and so he was pretty adamant about that . Now , now , being humble doesn't mean that you're a doormat , right ? Right Doesn't mean that people walk on you or you're passive or you never share your opinion .

So this man was pretty . He was very specific about the fact that , what he disagreed with and why he disagreed with it , and so it caused all of us to stop and reconsider what we were doing , and you know what he was actually right .

And so , looking back on that , it's like no , I am so thankful that we allowed ourselves to stop and listen to the minority opinion , but that minority opinion was correct , and if we had not been teachable , if we had not been humble as a group , we would have made a pretty bad mistake .

And so I think you know for those of you who are not employers but you're an employee you might feel sometime intimidated to speak your mind or speak your opinion in a group . But being humble doesn't mean you're quiet . You need to make sure you do your homework , but when you speak , you might have to do it in private , but speak with confidence .

You know if , if one the leader and I've been through this many times with you know doing coaching and consulting and stuff and and I'll have one , one gentleman that's the CEO of the company and and he's just very gruff , and this example I was thinking you know he's very gruff and to the point and and it's pretty much his way , or the highway .

And he was asking me because I don't understand why I'm not getting the loyalty out of my people . It's very obvious to me , but let me explain it to you . You're probably not going to like the answer , so you should probably sit down . I'm not here to be your friend . I'm here to tell you what you really need to hear .

And I went through this whole process and he's like no , I don't think that's it . I'm like it is it . I said here's what we're going to do . And what I did is I said tell me a little bit about what

you do . And they had Monday meetings , monday meetings every Monday , nine o'clock at everybody in there . I go do you lead the meeting ? He goes yes , and he goes how does those meetings go ? He goes it's just it's sort of a meeting . We do that .

I'm like great , here's what I want you to do next Monday , when this meeting starts at nine o'clock , I want you to come to your office at eight , 55 and call me . He goes all right , what are we going to do ? I'm like well , you're going to tell who's your second in command , who who would run your company if you're not there .

He goes well , that'd be Billy . I'm like well , tell Billy to start the meeting without you . And he goes all right , so what's that going to do ? I'm like just come to talk to me at eight 55 and I'll talk to you . So he comes down there and he told Billy to do the meeting . He comes in eight 55 and he comes in and calls me .

He goes all right , what am I supposed to be doing ? I'm like nothing . I said I just want you to sit there at the desk . He goes why this is so stupid ? I'm like it is so stupid . You're right , but that's the way I do things . It's off the wall and you're going to sit at your desk . And he goes why don't I want to sit at my desk ?

I'm like you're going to sit at your desk and I want you to talk to me till nine 15 . He goes what are we going to talk about ? I'm like you don't say anything . I just need to make sure you're at your desk for nine 15 . Do your work and I'm going to stay on the phone with you . So he stayed until nine 15 . He goes all right , can I go ?

I'm like yes , absolutely can go . But here's one thing that's going to happen You're going to walk back to your room and you're going to sit in the back of the room . You're just going to wave to Billy to keep the meeting going and he goes okay , why am I going to do that ?

You're just going to do that and then you're going to sit in the back for the entire meeting and you're going to let Billy handle the meeting and you're going to be an observer and then you're going to walk back after the meeting . You're going to call me back . He goes fine , tim , I don't know what your silliness is , but that's okay , I'll do it anyway .

So he did this . He comes back after a meeting about two hours later and I go how was the meeting ? He goes you know it was actually a great meeting , we got a lot of things accomplished . I'm like great , here's another thing that's going to happen . I'm like you're never to lead a meeting again . He goes what I go ? You're the problem I said .

I've been trying to tell you that I was like you're putting the thing people are not going to open up to you because it's your way , or the highway , when you put somebody in there that's open and receptive and that's humble and that can have that collaborative environment . You're going to get things done .

I said you , as a owner of the company , should never lead a meeting again . And we argued back and forth a few times because that's what people do , that especially have that big ego . I said you're not humble and people don't respect you as humble .

And ultimately we got him finally talked into it and he stopped leading the meetings and his company turned around become a very close knit environment where it was very diverse and backstabbing and all that stuff and it was just a little thing . He couldn't figure out how to embrace humility and be a humble man .

So let's just take a minute and talk about teaching humility to our children . Okay , and just from your leadership perspective . You know , I think part of it is being humble , is that we're teachable . We talked about that . I think being humble it means you're a good listener .

You know , being humble means that you realize that the world does not revolve around you . And so I think one of the things that for me in teaching that to our kids as they were growing up was we're going to find a place that we can serve .

We're going to humble ourselves and we see that in the book of in the Bible , in the book of Philippians , chapter 2 , what a great passage about the humbleness of Jesus . It says he humbled himself and became a servant , and I think that's part of living out . Humility is to put other people's needs in front of yourself .

So if you , if you are serving somewhere it could be local food bank , it could be you know scouting , it could be helping the softball team , it could be , you know , volunteering at your church or the community center you want to be sure that someone else's agenda and needs are in front of yours .

So think about as far as that was a great example you gave with that one business . Any other insights about that , about teaching that to your kids ?

And I try to put examples in where , where we'll be somewhere and we're doing something and I'll give , like my son or daughter , kudos , you know , and even though it was my idea , I'll be like well , you know , you know , lisa , she , she thought it was a great idea if we did this , so we stopped and bought you , you know , a donut , right ?

You know , brought you a donut this morning , right ?

But here's the thing I said we're family , we're a team and if we're a team , we do things as a team and it doesn't matter who gets the credit out of it , it's it's long as we're doing good for other people , and if I can give it to you and it makes you feel good , I'm going to feel good , making you feel good .

I don't have to have the credit for it . And I've done this in leadership . I do this in business . The way I set up my company in the construction company is I give all the credit to my project managers . I give them full reign . All the communications goes back through my project managers .

A lot of times I get myself in trouble with owners because they don't think that I really do anything . They think , well , he's making a profit and he's not really doing it . Everything is this guy is in the field , or this guy or this guy . And what I've done is I've said that I've gave them the power . I want them to have the power .

I want all the vendors to call them , I want the owner to call them . I want the text messages going back from my project manager . And then sometimes it's looked at as bad , but I don't care , because if I can give somebody a power , I'm not a power . I don't have an ego . I don't need that .

I just run around a successful business and if that's the business model and it's worked for me for 20-some years and if I can keep that business model going and everybody's happy with it and we get successful projects , I don't have a problem .

If they think this guy did the whole house by himself , even though we talk every 30 minutes to an hour and I'm making as many decisions of pretty much 90% of them because they're running back through me and I try to get them to make decisions and they make decisions on the spot .

But I mean , it's a process , you know , but I try to give all that kudos to my guys and just tell them they're the ones that did it and I'll just take a step back and I'm okay with that .

I'm sitting there and I know the questions because me and one of my supervisors talked 30 minutes before , but then I say go ahead and send out the text message to the client . I had the same thing with a client .

One of my supervisors started new , the plumber called me and I was standing right next to him at the job site and there's a plumber and I said hey , the plumber's calling . He's like okay , I'm like hang on , hang on , hang on , okay . And he said call the plumber back , see what he wants . And the supervisor's like why didn't you just answer the phone ?

And I said let me explain . And just what I said . On that I said you're the project manager here , I don't want him calling me . I don't want 150 vendors calling me . You're the all knowing person , that's what you're here for . You need to be able to control the vendors and all that stuff . That's your job .

I said I can control them , I'm good , I can pick up the phone and say this is what's going to happen . But I said that's your job . So it took a while to get him to the understanding and they go oh , I get it .

You're handing the power off to me and this guy needs to sort of make sure that I'm happy , not you , because I'm the person needs to be happy . I'm like yeah , I said it ain't going to affect me .

If something happens , I'll be like , yeah , that's fine , but it's going to affect you because I'm going to be yelling at you for not getting your stuff done and you can't yell at him . I want you to be able to yell at him . I want one source to yell if something's not getting done , and that's you .

You have the power to yell at everybody else and that's where I've gave it . I've set up my stuff , I've ran that for 27 years now and it's just taken the ego out of the business .

So , oh , you're saying , I am so proud of you for doing whatever .

And so the question is when they don't do whatever , are you still proud of them ? So it's very easy to have our words be performance based acceptance , and that's what our children hear . And so if they don't perform , then do they feel like you don't love them or accept them ? And so we tried .

We weren't always successful , but it's like you should be proud of yourself for doing this . Are you ? You know you should be excited for yourself that you got that hit , or you know you should be proud that you studied hard to do this . And so we're trying .

We tried to shift the focus from a performance-based acceptance to hey , we accept you just the way you are . You did the hard work .

You know you should be proud of the hard work that you did or the fact that you didn't give up or you didn't quit , or you kept doing this , or you know that was such a good thing that you did , son , opening the door for that woman to go in the grocery store .

I mean so you just like you said , you just build other people up , you encourage them , and what you encourage gets repeated .

You know , and here's the thing I mentioned earlier you know I try to give my kids a lot of stuff and you know , and I tell them what's not . You know we have a TV and our SUV . I'm like , not everybody has a TV and their SUV and they didn't understand that for a while . So , you know , they were young .

Now that they're getting older , they're like okay , I understand this now and these are the little things , if you can drop little seeds in there , you know , because I don't want my kids to grow up and , you know , expect things and I want them to work hard to be able to get things and , like I say , I make them do chores to get things and where we , you

know , if you treat somebody nice , you get rewarded and there's some different , you know , checkpoints that we have in there and we'll continue to have it because I want my kids to be humble and I grew up sort of humble . I still think I am very humble and you know , it's just what I strive for .

I'm waiting for the good Lord to bless me with that $500 million lottery , or something , so I can really test to see how humble I am . I'm really . I'm up for the test . I'm just waiting .

It's something that you can pass on as something you can teach People . watch by example . Whether it be your friends , whether it be your kids , there's always ways you can do examples of humility . It's just be happy what you were blessed with . Don't look at anybody else and you know eyes where you wish you had that . Just be humble .

Say lots of prayers and wait for your blessings , because that's what it is .

And so I'm just going to encourage you know , that's like being courteous , but it's also being humble , because you're there to help other people and so I'm going to just encourage our young audience if that's not something that you've practiced or learned that the next time you're at the grocery store maybe you're going to the gym or maybe you're going to wherever

you're going the restaurant just look around you , be conscious of the people around you , and if there's someone walking out when you're walking in , hold the door open for them . If they're walking in you know they're right behind you open the door for them . And if you're dating somebody , guys , learn to open the door for them .

And I'm like that's sort of what people do . She goes I've never experienced this and any guy I've ever dated had somebody open the door for me and that's why it made such an impact on her , because she wasn't used to it , and she had to call and tell me like I just don't even know what to do . What should I think about this ?

I'm like I think that he's a gentleman and you might have found you a good guy at this point .

And so , dads , if you , you can have a daughter that's six , so you can have a daughter that's 16 . I would encourage you to take them out for something you know , go to McDonald's , go to somewhere , but model the behavior that you want the person that she's dating to do .

Okay , and show her what it's like to be a gentleman , to be courteous , to be humble and put your needs above theirs , and I just think that's a really good lesson to learn .