This is the Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast with iHeartRadio.
Hey guys, welcome to the Almost Famous Podcast. Today is the most exciting episode we've ever had because it is Ben and Jess's baby story. They just got on. It's the first time I've seen Ben for twelve days. But I said, it feels like eternity because there's been so much that has happened in his life since. And I also feel like you guys are celebrities right now because because like it's like, do I even know you anymore? Is there like a whole other perse your tool are people? Okay? Well,
birth stories are my absolute favorite. I want every single detail of it. But first, how are you doing well?
First of all, I knew that you would want every detail, so I literally journaled timestamps.
She did, and we talked about it in the hospital. She goes, It's gonna be so great to talk about this with Ashley because I have everything timestamp Yes.
Like why do I love birth stories with so much detail?
I think because they're all so different, and like I want to tell mine now like I want everyone else. You know, you get it, right, I totally get it. It Also is just like such a big accomplishment that you like want everyone to know what you've done.
I feel like, yeah, I think that there's definitely because there's a uniqueness to every single one.
Yes, exactly what we're doing.
Everyone is just like you're right. Everyone is like a rocky story. Well I don't know if I called mine a rocky stores. I was like, it's easy, but okay, ready, let's go.
Okay, Well, we checked into the hospital Monday night at seven thirty.
Ish, I'll add because we had a plan and the hospital had us at a check in time. We did something I would recommend to every couple that is able that is kind of planning an induction. We went to a great dinner together before we went to the hospital, so so cute. We have like a little date night. And it was weird because I was like, when we leave here, we're pulling up to a hospital to have a baby. So that's how we start our evening.
And then yeah, and we checked in Monday, Monday night.
Monday night, and I obviously I wasn't in active labor. I was like barely dilated. So their goal overnight was to get me dilated. We knew that she was head down and so I just like got all checked out, and then they started to give me sidotech to get dilated at like eight thirty that night, so I got that every four hours, and I started to have contractions at like nine thirty, but there wasn't any pattern to
them or anything like that. So then they kept trying to put like the balloon in to dilate my cervix faster.
Did you have the epidurla with the balloon in? No?
Why not?
I told you. My nurse told me. She was like, you can do it without an epidural, because because I wasn't dilated at all, she was like, if you get up, a girl you like can't get up for who knows how long. And I'm actually glad I didn't because I end up laboring for thirty six hours. So I was happy to be able to get up and stuff.
Okay, I'm just this is not my story obviously, so I'm just going to chime in with my thoughts a little bit during this.
Please, Yeah, we need the chime in.
Yeah, We're gonna put a balloon in to help the dilation. I'm like, Oh, that doesn't sound that aggressive. Okay, just remember that thought. Just remember that thought, as she continues.
So they try to put it in at twelve am, and I wasn't ready for it, but I did get pain management in my IV throughout. I wasn't like totally toughing it out because it was really aggressive. And then they tried to get at one forty five, but I still wasn't dilated. And then at four am they were finally able to get it in. So I'd had like three doses of the side attech by then, So we've got the balloon in.
How many centimeters were you?
I was only one to get the Holy moly, girl, I know. So then I got another side of TECK at eight fifteen to get even more dilated. And then at like around ten am, they tried to get the balloon out because it had been in there for six
hours and it wasn't ready. And then they tried to get at one forty five and they only got half of it out, so then I still had like another half in because it makes like a sandwich around your cervix, so the other half was still in and so we were basically just like waiting all day.
What did it feel like?
Just like a lot of pressure, okay, And like I was still getting up and going to the bathroom and stuff, and it just felt like it just felt yeah, pressure and like there was something stuck up my body, which there was.
Did you feel like with the contractions intense at this point?
They weren't. It was more like cramping contractions. It wasn't like active, active labor. Okay, it really wasn't that bad. We were just sitting around.
I know why you're asking me. I have no idea you were in time.
I see the same thing.
I know.
I'm like, it wasn't that bad, right, yeah, or like that part was bad, right.
Such a blur. But then at four they got the balloon out and I was four cin ameters dilated and they could feel her head, and then at four point thirty I started to have like the craziest contraction. So four thirty PM on Tuesday.
Right, so you are already like been in bed for almost two full days.
Now almost one? Yeah, one full day?
Oh yeah it was Monday, Okay, so never Tuesday at a pm? Okay, yeah, yes almost for us.
Yeah, So that Tuesday afternoon, we were just like sitting talking to my parents, and all of a sudden I was getting like the worst pain in contractions, ever, and so we called in the nurse to get my epidural started. And so that's this is where the action happens. It's been kind of bowing up to this point.
Okay, okay, because is Ben's caption. I wasn't sure if it was all about just the birth of his daughter being like the craziest adventure, or whether there was an adventure to the birth.
There was an adventure, I'd say, no matter what, Like now that we've gone through it and I saw, just do it, no matter how good or bad it goes, it is an adventure. It is the wildest thing I've ever been a part of, from start to finish. The balloon getting removed even to this day, like seeing Waynna come out was wild? Was it full frontal or above? I did both?
Oh, you did both?
Okay, But the balloon part was like when it got removed, I was like, you are a like I don't know how a human being is doing what you're doing because it was so much bigger than I expected it to be.
God, And it was like was it like a baby's head?
Yeah, one hundred percent, and it like I don't I still don't get it, Like I I meant it when I said I don't have words, because like it's the whole thing was just me probably like standing there like I don't understand, and she was just was And I don't think this is like even a compliment because I don't think it's necessary. She was so tough, like there was very little like screaming like crying, like it was just like she was in it, like this was like a this was game day and she was full on
like I'm going to make this thing happen. Yeah, and I was watching it like in pain, like my for myself. So okay, she can now go to where.
Like because I need to know what the epidural was in When they took out the balloon.
No, and I didn't realize. I didn't realize that it should have been no one like really because they came in and they were like, okay, you're definitely ready to get the balloon out, like I'm just gonna do it. Are you good? And I was like yeah, like I didn't think it was going to be anything. And then my nurse on the shift change was like, you didn't get your epidural for the balloon coming out? I was like no, but it was fine.
It was very brief because it was just like whoa, yeah, it just.
Popped right out.
No, yeah, okay, okay.
So then I get the epidural and this is at five PM, and the epidural goes in like totally fine. I like I had a great anesthesiologist. It didn't hurt like I thought it would.
I told you. I was like, why, I'm no offense to people who have fears of needles, but you're not looking at it.
No, I was.
I right when I said, it hurts just as much as maybe a botox prick in your forehead, yes.
Or like a beasting like something like that. Like it's really nothing so wild and quick, yes, so quick. But the problem was I had a huge blood pressure drop. Like I got it in and then all of a sudden, Ben said, I turned like really really white, and I looked at the mcg all just know. I was like yeah, I was like, I'm super lightheaded, and I like thought I was going to pass out. And then her blood pressure dropped and so we lost her heartbeat for like
ten minutes. So they like, yeah, they flipped me on all fours, So I'm on all fours in my hospital gown and like ten doctors come rushing in. It turns out this is like very common and not like as big of it of an emergency as we thought it was. But it was scary.
I think you getting on all fours and like your blood pressure going down sounds normal. Her them not being able to find a heartbeat on her for ten minutes, yeah, oh wow.
They were getting ready to roll me back for a C section.
Yeah.
Yeah. So they had like a small like her like Whinnie's heart rate dropped like they could still find it, but it was like severely low. And it was this I think this is like a typical dad moment in the hospital. So like I when we first just got to the hospital, the nurse's head like kind of like we were talking to them and they're like, you know, I was like, what is a dad's strategy during this whole like process, And they said, you know, we see
it all. We see dads come in rolling their Xbox, hook it up through the TV, put their headphones in and the nerd kid and never pay attention for like the whole time. And I'm like, well that's that's a little bunch. And then they're like and then we have dads that are like hovering like always like up in our business, like never leaving the bedside like and they're like that just makes work hard. And so like I in my mind was like, okay, I need to be present,
but not hovering. I want to be present, but I don't want to like be standing at just A's bedside the whole time because these people know what they're doing. So the epidural goes in and I was sitting in front of Jess like just kind of like that's what they tell you to do, yeah, like hanging out.
With her, hold her hands.
Yeah, and it was done, and everybody's okay, everything's good and just like just give a few minutes. So she lays back in bed and then like some other nurses come in and like start like doing some stuff with her.
So I get up and I walk over to my sofa bed and Indiana Basketball was about to come in, so I start logging into my peacock account and on my iPad and I look up and all of a sudden, like there's ten doctors in the room, and so I remember just looking around like I don't understand what's happening. And a nurse comes over and sits by me and she's like, this is very normal, but like you should prepare to get rolled back into like the or. I'm like, what what do you mean? Like this is normal and
we're going to the or. So by the time it happened and it was done, I was just kind of like not processing it. That was kind of a theme for me. I think for the to those two days is like I was slow to process exactly what was happening when it was happening.
Okay, But all the nurses said that Ben should teach a lesson to h Bins on how to be in the delivery room because he was so awesome, Like he was the perfect support. That's perfect, I'll imagine. Yeah, I know, no surprise, but it was the best. But once my epidural was in and like I was good, they broke my water. Yeah, and I was ninety percent.
Like she just like like the heart rate just went back up after you like change positions.
Yes, so changed positions. She was fine obviously, yeah, and I was okay too. I was just like a little shaken up. Yeah, but they just like went for it.
After that, It's it's a uh I mean, I'm sure people are going to listen to this and be like, oh, yeah, that happened to me, or I know somebody happened to It's a like almost like tortuous experience because at this point Jessica I had now seen probably an hour before that like her mother bear coming out like all of a sudden, like her mentality changed her, like the way she was going through it changed, like she is she was becoming a mom in front, like in front.
Of my eyes.
And so this like blood pressure drop happens, and all of a sudden, like I said, it happens so fast that like it kind of feels like an emergency. Probably is considered an emergency. So Jessica's on all fours and she's wondering what is happening. I don't feel good. My blood pressure is low. And they're starting to talk like hey Whennie's blood pressure is low? And then so like jess starts getting anxious, right like is she okay? She starts asking like is whinny okay? Is whinny okay? Is
whinny okay? Yeah?
Are you just like we like you're are you just like oh maybe I just want to get the sea sections just so I don't have to worry.
Yes. I looked at them and I was like, whatever it takes to get her out healthy, like do it. Like I looked at my nurse and said that, and she was like noted.
And and then to get this problem fixed, they give you a medication to speed up your heart rate. So you're anxious about your like baby and her health, like you're freaking out, you're scared for the baby. And then they give you this medication to speed up your heart rate. So then you get more anxious. And now I'm anxious because Jess is like medically anxious. She's already anxious, but now she's like hyper anxious and like scared. So this
whole thing feels like a whirlwind. And then it's done and everybody leaves and you're just it's just like the three of you, you, your nurse, the two of us in the nurse in the room again and it's like quiet, and you're like, what just happened?
That's so funny. So my dad had you know, he's anantasysiologist forre you guys listening, and he has not worked on the Once you get to a certain like point in your career, you can kind of decide what kind
of cases you want to take. And he hasn't been on the Obie floor and at least a decade, I would say, like fifteen years, because he says it's the most unpredictable place in the entire hospital, and it makes him so nervous because every case is just he did never know what to expect, and they turn so quickly.
Oh I totally yeah one, and like anything good I could have, anyone could be rolled back at any time, you know, like you just have no idea because it's up to the baby.
And this is when you think, like how in the world did we deliver children over one hundred years ago? Like how did not even one hundred years ago, but like seventy years ago, Like how was this a thing? How are we so lucky to live in this like seventy year period of this world? Because if you needed to see section back in the eighteen hundreds, eh no, I know, we.
Talked about that so much with their nurse, like what did you do?
I don't know, crazy, so wild? Okay, so now you're chill and you got your epidural, they broke your water you barely felt that.
Yeah, and then nothing.
Yeah, and so now you're just chilling waiting to dilate more.
Yes, I have the potocin drift the whole time too, so I'm like having contractions. I was having contractions every two minutes for like ten hours.
And you had no idea, no idea.
Yeah, but at like what time was it? At ten pm, my nurse came in and did like a circuit where she changed my positions, like the mile circuit, so you changed positions, and she was like massaging my pelvis and just like getting baby to like move down into my pelvis more. And so we did that for like an hour, and then I fell asleep and then they checked my dilation at eleven and or no, they checked my dilation at eleven and I was seven centimeters dilated and the
nurse could see Winnie's hair, which is crazy. And then I fell asleep for an hour and a half, and at twelve thirty am on Wednesday, I was ten centimeters dilated and so we were ready to push.
And when they said okay, we're ready to push, what were your feelings?
I was so excited because we've been there for so long, just like waiting and like I was being poked and prodded and like I'm just so excited. But Ben was fast asleep, so the nurse had to wake him up and woke him up and it was like it's time to push. And then it was like.
It's so crazy.
When I went to sleep, she was four centimeters they'd just broken her water and so they're like, hey, if you want to like get some sleep, now's your time. And I was like when is this, Like when do you think this could happen. They're like it will happen like early morning, Like, yeah, I'm gonna go to sleep, like if everything's good. She's like, looks like take a nap. And so when they woke me up, to're like all right,
then it's time to push. I I'll never forget that feeling of like, oh, it's now happening, like we are. And I looked at Jess and she has like this smile and happy tears and she's like are you ready? And I'm like I'm ready, and we just are like I guess we're gonna go through this until we have a baby.
Yeah. It's so weird because it's like so crazy for us. And then the nurses are like we do this multiple times a day.
Yeah, and it's time.
Let's just it's time.
Let's do it.
Yeah.
She was like are you ready to you want to do it now?
I was like yeah.
Like so, Jess and I kind of had a birth plan tentatively where I was going to DJ, like I brought a speaker to DJ pushing part, and so there was like a like Jess would like go through and push and then rest and she'd be like, all right, new song, next song, A little I want a little faster, a little slower, because I start out with like some like real slow, Like I have this playlist on Spotify that I made for Jess that we like that she can listen to anytime she wants to add songs to
and so, but it's like lovey and slow, and so I started playing that. I was like this is be sweet and she's like, no, we got to speed this up. Let's get nineties like pop. And I'm like, okay, nineties pop. So in sync comes on. That works for a little bit, and then we move into like what's going to make people dance on tables? And I'm like, all right, that playlist, let me type that in.
It's my favorite playlist on Spotify. It's like making dunk people dance on tables or something like that. It's so good. But I was it was the middle of the night. I started pushing at one thirty, so I was like falling asleep in between contractions. So I had to have.
Like you had been awake for how long, like two days?
I hadn't slept hardly. I had taken like two two hour naps maybe.
And then what about eating?
I hadn't eaten in a long time.
Yeah, you ate.
Right, you had a casadia.
You have a before my epidural.
Oh that was the it had been quite some time.
Yeah, yeah, it had been a while. So anyways, been DJ. I pushed for an hour and a half foremost and she came out to Rihanna singing, please don't stop the music yep, and all the nurses were laughing because she was like wiggling her head.
You could see her like coming out and she was just going like this, no, and then there's like what is she doing? And she was just like wiggling her head back and forth.
That's hilarious. I love that.
Yeah, and then we I don't know how good of a view you'll have, but.
We've got a great view.
Winnie came out at what two point fifty two three am at seven pounds three ounces, twenty inches long.
Amazing, so beautiful and so wonderful. And how was your feeling? I feel like both of you guys, you saw heaven.
Honestly, yes, the nurses told us that it was like their favorite post birth moment they've had, because both of us were just like happy, tears excited, couldn't believe it, like honestly breathless. She came out and like, obviously we're biased, but she has a really really cute face and I couldn't believe that that was her face.
And you were so excited to see her face.
Oh my gosh, I was so excited to see her face and she like her lips were all swollen and she just looked like the perfect little baby was the best.
It was about to cry.
Yeah, it was crazy. Well, the nurse was really sweet to me too, because I was more like interested that I thought I would be, Like we talked about this right before, right before. It's funny how things change, Like I was more intrigued with what was going on once it felt like things were going well, and so the
nurse would like clean Jess up. In between like pushing moments, and then she'd be like, Ben, you want to come look, and so like she was really sweet and like to Jess and I both like where I you know, she would clean her up, we'd get all reset, and then she'd be like you should come look, and so like I got to see the top of Oney's head, which
was insane to see. And then like as when he got to come out, but like once she's ready to come out, like it happens so fast, like they don't tell you, like this is going to be the last one.
They're like, you're getting close, Jess, and then all of a sudden there's a baby like wailing and they're holding her up, and then they just gave her to Jess and like they did this like when he was wailing, and as soon as they laid Winny on Jess's chest, she stopped and the two of them just like laid there together for an hour and which was incredibly sweet, and so you know, they got justs like cleaned up and like probably I'll like my favorite moment though, was
everybody leaves then once like the cord's cut and like Jess is like cleaned up and everything's like.
The cord cutting was nothing right but nothing.
It is tough. It's like thinker than I thought I was. But then it was just Winnie, jess and I in the room, and I like I think jess and I both had this like massive letdown, Like I didn't realize how like stressed I was about the whole situation. And
then obviously Jessica just gave birth. So as soon as everything was good and when he was safe and everything had been done and the room was quiet, like we both just like took this deep breath and we turned on some worship music, like real soft worship music, and we all three fell asleep like for a good hour and a half, just like as a family, which was like so like it was like a beautifully magical moment because I think everybody was so tired and like now
we were going to start this journey is a family together.
It was really special. It was like a long waiting process I feel like my labor was. But it was so good.
Then, Jessica says, when we woke up from the nap, she was holding winning and I was like, how you do and She's like, I do it again right now for her, Like I would go all through this again. And I was like, that's insane because I assuming you will.
Yeah, I assuming God it is the plan. Yeah, but I would have like I would have labored for however long I needed to to have her. She's like the most perfect thing, and she's such a good baby and she's a week old today, so we're settled in as a family and it's just been like the best thing ever.
So sweet. Guys. So when when you were like that whole last about like you felt good right, like you weren't you were comfortable?
Yes, I mean it's crazy if you get n up dar all, Like, it's not painful, it's just the pressure. So like, especially when she was about to come out, I was like I have to keep pushing because the pressure is like so intense. But it wasn't like painful. And then they sit you up when you still have your epidural too, so it was awesome.
M totally. And then how was how did your body feel? I think like immediately you're just like relieved. You don't like you actually like don't even like feel your body Like is that kind of a weird description of it.
No, that's like a perfect description.
It's I mean.
Also probably because we have the epidurals. Yes, but no baby coming out anymore. And then afterward, you know, it kind of hits next morning. How did how are you feeling physically right now?
Well, I had three tears, all in different places. In one of them, I mean, is it Teami.
No, it's not team I tell us all because I couldn't walk for like three to four weeks after Dawson. But after Hayden, I danced the next day. It was weird.
It's insane, but yeah, the nurses said that the second baby, they call it a stop and drop when the when people are in labor, it's like so fast and easy.
It was so it was crazy. The second one was so crazy. I just couldn't believe. I was like, it's going to hit me right when I'm dancing in the kitchen the day after, and it never really hit. It was weird, but guess because you tear so much less the second time. Anyway, How was how was the tear?
Well, I had a second degree tear and then I had a tear on my urethra, which is like really tough. So I had a catheter for another twenty four hours in the hospital, and that one hurt really that tears. It's still a little tough. I'm sitting on my like inflatable doughnut right now. Yeah, but overall, I feel better than I thought I would. I thought I would feel like I kind of got like hit by a car, But yeah, it hasn't been that bad.
Good.
The crazy thing to me is, I don't know if this is like a thing, but as so, like the pushing part is incredible, and it because of the time of day and because of how long it was, like Jess would kind of fall asleep in between pushing because she was so tired and she was working so hard at it. But as like when he moved down, like just the amount of like justice belly was like diappringing, like in the midst of the pushing, Jess and I looked at her belly and we're like, you have a
belly button again. It's so weird to that or they just yeah it like it was that was crazy to me. Yeah, I don't know, like that that part was wild, just how quickly the belly like started to go away. And now it's crazy to me that I kind of like right now, like her parents are out here that week my parents are out here right now and we're doing some work on the house. So like the mornings and
the evenings are my time with Winnie. And during the day like she just kind of gets passed around and then Jess like takes her for a long time and everything. But when he will lay on my chest and her head will be like on my shoulder and her feet will be like at my groin, and every time, like I'm like, how did you fit fit in my like in my wife, like just as a foot shorter than me, and like somehow you were in there and it doesn't like that doesn't like the anatomia, that doesn't make sense.
Yeah, so tell me about the day after, because that's a day you know, the hospital has a schedule for you. Then you have the newborn shoot, and then the nurses are waking you up every hour to go pee or every twenty minutes.
It was insane. Yeah, I really felt like every twenty minutes someone was in there like doing something to me or to Winny. And because I tour where I did, like they had to check my catheter bag and they had to like then they would do the fundel massage and like see how my bleeding was and then they would check on Winnie and it was like the craziest day ever. So we had the option to spend a second night, like for recovery, so I took that. So I spent the night Thursday night too, just to like
be able to try and sleep a little bit. And it was nice because I kept you have so many questions, like because I decided to breastfeed, and that's really hard too because you don't have your milk yet, and so like having people there to support was really helpful. But those two days in the hospital felt like the biggest whirlwind because you're getting so much info. You're like figuring out your body and like how to handle that, and there's.
Just feels like a business day kind of Yes, I'm like I have.
So many meetings today, this is crazy.
You know you have some forms to fill out. Yeah, it was wild, including the birth certificate. So how did you guys come up with the name Winnie? Winnie Higgins tell us about when you came up with this name. I know you had it for a while, but you didn't I didn't tell us.
We have a list of boy names that are pretty extensive, and that has been hard for us to narrow down because we like so many and like, as soon as just found out she was pregnant, she started like doing the like notes on her phone with the names that we would hear, and girl names were really hard for us. There wasn't many we agreed upon. And then there was a moment where we were sitting on the couch in
our living room kind of like going through names. And I don't exactly remember how Winona got brought up.
So it wasn't a why no writer movie no.
Because I'm from Winona Lake, Indiana, So somehow we came up with Winonah is such a beautiful name. And then we both are like, we like that name. It I mean in a lot of ways as an ode to like where I'm from in a place that matters a lot to me. But also it's it's not that in the sense that we just really liked the name. It means first daughter, which we didn't know when we picked it out. Yeah, and like the symbolism of the name
why Noona is really beautiful. It has like it means patient, it means resilient, it means kind, it means others focused, and so like there was just a lot of things going well for the name, why Noona and who we dream of her being? But we both it was like
the only girl name we both liked. Like I was really into names that had like cute little nicknames like Gigi or like viv or something like that, and so with one Nona, I was like, oh, my gosh, we can call her Winny like yes, and she has a Winnie the Pooh theme nursery that was already in place before we knew the name, So yeah, so that works
out really great. We don't want to go overboard on Winnie the Pooh, like we love Winning the Pooh in this household a lot, but we don't want it to be like, oh, we named you after Winning the Poop because we didn't. But she does have like a Winnie the Pooh theme nursery, and we just think it's such a cute little name.
So that is so cute. What is the thing about home life with money that is most surprising to you?
First of all, our dog is obsessed with her.
Yes. Oh, you guys were so stressed, And I told you I was like, our dog hates everyone except we brought our kids home, and she she's like, oh, hey, I was up.
Yeah, he's he is obsessed with her in the sweetest way, Like he is sweeter to her than he's ever been to any other human in the world.
So special.
She lays by her in the morning, he licks like off her shirt like if he can get up to her. Don't try to let him that close. But like if she has like a spit towel, like he'll like care for it. He's incredible with her. So if like I'm holding her on the couch, he always curls up right next to us.
So sweet. I'm so happy to hear this.
That was the first time. I think there was just a lot going on. We got home from the hospital and Jess pretty much immediately went into nurse and I was like kind of unpacking some stuff, and I walked into the room and Waylon was laying at Jess's feet while when they were in the rocking chair nursing, and I lost it, like, like I've never.
Seen him kig like that before.
That's beautiful and it's a relief.
It's a relief. I prayed like hands and niece straight to Jesus for ten months, even before we knew we were pregnant, Like God like, what can we do to help this dog be the dog I know he is, Like I love him so much and I know he's going to be a great big brother, but like what can we do? And prayers were answered like immediately.
So and they have been amazing.
Yeah, so that's been amazing, Like we're so grateful for that.
Did you have anything that you did specifically aid?
We did a lot of training beforehand, Like we did we hired a trainer to do like baby training. We would carry around like a baby doll around the house. We'd lay a baby doll in its crib. We did a lot of like positive reinforcement for like how he would react around the baby doll. And then we sent home some of her items after birth with my parents because they were watching him and he like had those.
And then when we got home, we put up a baby gate, put Winnie in a like in our car seat behind the baby gate wheel on the other side so he could like smell her, and then we just like gave him a bunch of treats during it, like tell him he was great, and after that he was kind of like awesome. And Jess has been in like an incredible mother, like it's wild. She knows this baby so well. She knows how what when he's thinking, when he's wanting her, and when he are like bonded in
the most beautiful way. And so we've kind of tag teamed it right now, where like Wayland's life hasn't changed that much. He still gets out on walks, my parents are here to help with that, and then like when her parents were out here, like he would have some fun days like outside of the house, and so like his life hasn't changed that much, which I also think has been a big deal. So he's not like jealous
or like this sucks, like what's happening. Yeah, So we just kind of tag teamed it the best we can right now.
My final question for you, amongst so many more that will come another podcast, and Ben, I feel like we probably need another one, just as like a follow up for all the other questions I didn't ask. But here's a betting question for you, guys. How have you changed in the past week and a half.
If I'm honest with you. Jess and I just talked about this last night, and I want to try. I've been thinking a lot about this because I want to be as honest to Dad's as possible. There is a biological connection I think that mothers have with their babies. Obviously they're growing inside of them, you feel the move, you're giving birth to them, right, and then you're you know, responsible for a lot of the things that keep this
baby alive. I was more worried about Jessica than I was anything else for a period of time when we're in the hospital. Oh yeah, I'm getting to you, don't be jealous. And then once Winona came out, I just looked over and I saw my family, and then there was like more I'd say, like there was this like
peace because of the situation. There was a love because of you know, it being my child, but there was more of an immediate feeling of like protection, like like I'm on guard a little bit now, and then every day gets to where I'm more just like like I worry more. I worry more about why I know that tonight than I did the first night we were home. Like there's well, put there's an everyday kind of like new.
Moment.
There's a new thing that makes me feel more connected to her. But I won't say, and I don't want to lie and say like the moment she came out of the womb, all of a sudden, this like overwhelming sense of like connection existed. It was more of a like a protection responsibility and a piece that everybody was good. And then every day I think there's a new like something is building and I can feel.
That perfectly, perfectly put. Jared would agree with you, yeah, And.
I just think it is. I think it's I don't know, everybody probably has a different experience, but when you're a mom like her and Winona, we're together for nine months like without me, and now I'm building this relationship with this girl that you know is in the world. So I'd say that's how i'd explain it. I don't know if that's perfect. I don't know if that summaris perfect
summarizes everything. But if I want to be honest, like if I have dads who are like I didn't feel anything for like two months, and I feel guilty about it, and I'm like, now that I'm I'm in it, I'm like, I don't think you should feel guilty about it. I don't know anybody in my life that's like, gosh, dang it, I really wish we never had kids. I know, but I do know people that are like I don't necessarily feel like I thought I did in the first month.
I'm somewhere in the middle of that. Yep, you don't want to force it.
I think that's something that needs to be talked about more because then it leads to more guys feeling so guilty.
Yeah, I don't think Gil is up. I don't think Gil and shame about your reaction? Is is anything helpful? I think it's a natural like progression to this like beautiful place. But goodness, it's beautiful. It's yeah, I'm looking at her. I mean it's beautiful, like it's crazy, it's it's something special. I do. Before we leave, want to give a shout to Rose. She's a Rose Baby, which if you're from Denver, you know, it's like the baby
hospital here in Denver. And they were outstanding, like outstanding at every level, at every turn with anything going on. They cared for Jess. Well they cared for why no, no, well, I think they cared about me, but I was more just kind of hanging but like I would, just I want to give them a shout out because they really did do an incredible job.
Jess, how do you feel differently the like I'm out of love I have for her. Like Ben said, like I do think there's like more of an adjustment period for the dad, but like I have this like insane protection over her that like my body will like shake if she's crying and I'm not in the room, Like.
That is something that you guys will you will feel it more and moarm I think when she starts becoming a little bit more awake to the world and like people will say, oh, you have to let her cry for a little while, you don't like and the mom is like the sound like I can, no, cannot, cannot, And then the dad doesn't hit them the same no.
And it's like I've I've tried to explain it to Ben, like it's not that I'm it's not an anxiety. It's just like a like I can make this better, like let me have her exactly.
It feels controlling maybe on the outside, but you're like, no, no, I know exactly. I don't know how to describe it. I know exactly how to hold.
Yes exactly, and it does feel controlling, and I'm like I don't want to be that mom that's like a helicopter mom, but like I just I feel like I know exactly what she needs. And I've never felt like I have all the answers before, but I feel like with her, I do have all the answers, which is weird.
I love the way you put that. That's beautiful.
And we're a weekend, so like you know, like there's a lot of like not a long way to go. Yeah, so, but like so far, it's it's I mean, I've known Jessica for a long time. It is there is a change, and in the best of ways, like she's still Jessica, the one I fell in love with, and she still has all the qualities that I need before, but there's like an additional like sensibility, a different an additional like like familiarity of life, and like a confidence that I've
never seen her have confidence in before. Like there's a confidence with my Nona that is different and it's beautiful. It's just it's wild to see. And it happened kind of right away, like I could tell, like right as soon as Winona went on her chest when she came out, I like, I, like I said, I could see something changing fierce.
Jess Yeah became I became a mom, very real quick.
It's so cute. I love it so much, all right, I can't wait to hear more and more about your experiences and all the other details that you're going to realize that you forgot. And we're going to talk to you probably been next week, back next week and Jess, we will talk to you soon and uh text us if you need any advice or any recommendations. You know, we love talking about this.
Thank you so much, and thank you for letting me do the whole timeline.
I hope that was okay, but it was delightful, true joy.
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