Hometown Hero

This is the Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous podcast with iHeartRadio.

It's almost famous podcast.

We were here breaking down Grant's season of The Bachelor. Now we are at hometown's this week. There's so much to talk about, Ashley. I'm going to start out the podcast with saying this, it is one of the most shocking exits of the season. Now, before we get to that, let's break down the episode.

Are you ready? Yes, we have Juliana's date for the first date.

It's in Newton, Massachusetts, East Coast, something you're familiar with.

I like the vibe, very familiar vibe.

I like the North End. Well, I guess it was the little Italy in her town, but you know Boston's North End, and.

I just don't. I don't know. How do you feel about this?

Because I know Juliana is the frontrunner, but overall I love her date, still wanting more. There's only one person in this competition that I feel real connection with.

I loved her date.

Actually date part was good.

Yeah, but I put it at number two as the hometowns for the week, Yeah, confidently at number two.

Yeah.

I loved her family. I loved her dad.

Now dad, granted, I married into an Italian family, so there is a level here where I just watched this and felt I did feel like there was missing something, because what I love it about Italian family is this, they are un apologetically almost rude and not like they're loving when you're inside of it. When you're inside of that circle, you feel like you have the most love

To be that teaser that they had last week where that you caught the dad's saying you're kissing.

My daughter in front of me or whatever did.

Seem so scary in the previews and such like a jokester moment in real life, which was cute.

I like that moment. It was my Probably my favorite moment was the day.

That and when the dad said I love him, I love the guy like that.

Was really must have made Juliana feel really good.

It had to him.

I just I've been around Italians like one hundred percent Italians. So when I first met Jess's family, her aunts, they sat me at a table and they sat across from me, and I was on one side of the table and they drilled me and they said, we like you Ben enough, but if you hurt Jess, we will hurt you. That was how they opened my very first time ever meeting them. And I remember leaving that being like, I don't know what they meant, and I had to get it explain to me because I've never been around.

That the mob was going after you.

I think they could have called upon him.

Okay, Can I just say that Jess doesn't strike me as like uber Italian in any way.

Yeah, She's like this sweet southern bell to me.

She does not register Italian, big Italian Northeast.

Yeah, she doesn't feel comfortable in those, but she lets her ants do what they want to do, right so they she knows that they have an element to them that she doesn't have, and I think she trusts it. And I think when somebody like me walks in where Jess is like I think I'm gonna marry this guy, She's like he needs to be able to handle this.

He did say, like I'm really concerned that you have through other girls here, and like I'm worried that you're gonna break her heart, which is you know, classic needs to say on a hometown. Yeah, you're right, It wasn't very intense. I was completely overwhelmed by the amount of people though, at this date and at let's SEEA's date, particularly this date, like when Juliana was rambling off how

Hellos, see can I mean this isn't about me?

You would have felt more environment because well you were the bachelor, because so maybe in this bachelor scenario, this would actually make you feel more comfortable because you don't have to have the spotlight on YouTube.

Nuch, you don't.

I mean cayleb Quinn's day I remember was incredible. Remember where the hotel I stayed in, where we went, who are family was, Her family was awesome. But there was only a small group of us together all day and it was a lot of pressure because you are spending all day with the same people and you're in an environment where you can't you can be yourself, but you have to protect your you know, the conversations that are existing.

Day, okay.

And I want to say that I did like the activity portion of this date where they went to make pizza and the guy truly eemed like authentic to knowing Juliana's and knowing the family, and then they went to the pastry shop, like it felt like something that we would do, like at my grandparents' house in Northern Jersey.

It felt very familiar and authentic.

I am going to say something that will probably be controversial to the listener, and it could be controversial to anybody as the bachelor, there was an element at these hometowns where you I specifically, I don't want to say that everybody did this, but I specifically paid attention to how people responded to the like the contestant that I was visiting. So how would the pizza shop maker respond, Where would they bring me in their hometown and who

Yeah, why why would this annoy anyone?

Because I think everybody else within this episode didn't have that. She's the only one. Oh, yes, it was like everybody else felt very distant from the date that they were presenting.

Yes, I thought this was the weirdest Hometown's episode because it felt like we were at nobody's hometown except for Joe's.

That was why it would be controversial to listener, because I know there's elements that came into play to cause that to be the case, and those elements I don't think, and rightfully so, we don't understand any of them, Like we don't know the stories behind like why Zoe's like hometown was the way it was. We know bits and pieces, we just don't know the story. And that's fine. I'm not mad about that. That's that's her prerogative, that's her personal life.

That's cool.

But it felt like this was the only real hometown that we got, yes to the point where it was like, oh my gosh, pore Grant. He had to go all over the country and like he didn't really end up having a hometown date with any of these girls except for Juliana. He ended up just meeting the family or you know, meeting the closest people to them.

They could have flown as well. They wouldn't have flown those people out. They would have obviously fen were in there.

But you know what I mean, Like the location didn't seem to play at all.

There were locations never made since me now freaking Wyoming. My family's had a ranch in Wyoming for my whole life. You want to know how many airports there are to fly into in Wyoming? Not many, Like there's not He had to take a dry I don't know where he was coming from. He might have fallen into the Denver for that day and drove six hours. Maybe he got some private planes.

I don't know.

But anyways, my I guess the controversial statement I was trying to make is this out of all of them, felt like the only hometown that actually existed. All those others could have existed anywhere in the country.

Yeah, I agree with you. I'm not going to heat or anything.

I can tell you that, Like in my hometown, I could walk into like the deli and they're not.

Going to know my name.

It doesn't mean that I'm not like, I don't feel like I'm from there. It's just different towns call for, you know, different relationships.

But you were made for a smaller town, all right.

So Juliana's day comes off and it's like, hey, she should be here next week. No questions to me. Now, was it the best hometown? Did it feel like everything happened how we thought it would know? But it was a great hometown. And I left that date feeling like, she's going to be here next week no matter what. So let's see who's not going to be here.

She's going to be in the finale.

I just feel like there's a huge discrepancy in this episode between the two in the finale presumably and the two that are not. And I just I still feel like I know that they were saying basically like I am falling in love with you I.

Don't feel a huge connection between the two of them.

Uh, it's I mean, if we're comparing based on this season, Ashley, it's it's up.

There in terms of connections.

Well, yeah, I know, I'm realizing that that is the problem to this season. I really don't feel a lot of intense depth.

I have a theory and I'll share at the end. Okay, I know who's going to be there in the final two.

Yeah, I feel like anybody watching knows. Okay, okay, okay, fair.

Then let's take what we have is the preview, and obviously we know that Grant is so conflicted at the end. So if you and I are sitting here saying we know who the final two are going to be, then obviously, at the very end of this the final two that we believe is going to be there, and Mark gonna say, man, it will say it's the very end of this episode he is so confus that he's falling in love with both of them.

No, I'm very confused by this.

Okay, we'll talk about it later. Let's move on to Zoe's hometown. Zoe was in both of our final fours. We've had belief in her since the very beginning. She's the only reason we can claim that our really baseless, assumption based show that happens at the beginning of every season has any merit because we both said Zoe will be there in the final four.

We're right day, we're experts, we're right now. Zoe.

To me and Grant, they I'm shocked that she is still here after this episode. It feels like they missed the mark on every level when it comes to communication, intimacy, physicality, community, Like it feels like they have no relationship to me.

Absolut freaking lutely bad.

Am I wrong?

That's exactly how I feel, Ashley.

I'm glad that you feel this way with me, because I watch this again.

You watched it twice.

No, I've watched the whole No, I say, I'm watching the whole season, and I watched this episode because there's been this like character arc of Zoe that's untraditional to

No, there's nothing there. And the fact that she chose to do.

The whole like model shoot with the bride stuff we had like a wedding shoot, Oh my gosh, and for her to be so little chemistry during that was just like, this is so awkward. And I bet you it was even more awkward in real life because we know how the show can take like a fine moment and make it look really romantic.

Put some music behind it.

They couldn't even make this look natural.

It was tough well and even some of the words she was saying to her sister, She said, what I love about Grant is he like, you know, I'm a hard working woman.

Great.

I celebrate that you are a strong, hard working woman. Okay, that's the baseline. She says. He likes the creative side of me, and I think he likes the model side of me. He'll take it all like why are they two different things? You're one human? Like why do those have to be separated?

Zoe?

Like, you were.

Both and that is beautiful and that is incredible and that is such a spectacular thing for you to have, is to be beautiful and creative and to be all these things at once. But it's like, when you say that, it makes me think that you're asking this dude to love two different people, and I think you're two different people.

I didn't pick up on that, but I did pick up on her sister being like, so, like, how do you feel about him?

You know, like are you falling in love with him?

And she was like, I like him yeah, something along those lines, and I'm like, okay, like, why is going on?

Just because you're both too hot people doesn't make this work.

It's not.

It feels like two hot people trying to make it work. I'm shocked she didn't go home. When I said the beginning, this is the most shocked.

Really this, I was like, what is he talking about?

She didn't go home. I thought for sure she would go.

Home, really, even after seeing Dinas Because after seeing Dina's I was like, uh, they're tied. If not, Dina's was.

Worse okay, because there was.

Zero chemistry there too, and you could tell that he was just like I have to like talk to your friends and even pretend like this is like something that might go anywhere. He was super thrown off at the family not being around, which I can get. Again, it's kind of like, why did you send me here to just go to a pumpkin patch with your friends?

Please come to la I don't know.

But let's let's talk.

About Latia's date first. Yeah, it's Wyoming, which again we get a brief and synopsis.

Let's be clear though, it's amazing place, so windy, so beautiful, and what with.

Becca Tilley once to the tea pause ts yees yea different part.

Of the state, but yes, very beautiful place.

Yeah, so they like like to meet here at We don't know if it's this cabin or if they rented out.

This felt like it could have been like a rented out cabin.

It was so extraordinary and if not, then it's like, okay, so what's your family.

Do you have this random, huge ass mansion?

And you know, because she's talking about her grandma a lot who her grandma couldn't be there obviously.

Well, her grandma has passed.

Yeah, so that's what I'm saying, I'm putting it.

Okay, Well that's what they kept saying, is you couldn't be there.

Yeah.

For clearing that up, okay's gracious.

So maybe the grandpa, you know, he's like he looks like a oil.

It's oil.

I was gonna say oil, but I was like, am I being weird for this.

Oil Ashley?

Okay?

I was like, this feels like what was the show with with Larry Hagman Dallas Dallas to Move.

Yeah.

Yeah, No, Like at some point this let's assume for the sake of this conversation that this is their family ranch, like this is their this is their fandy second home where they can go visit and have fun at and ride horses. Okay, a beautiful place, absolutely gorgeous. I love seeing because I love Wyoming, I do. I think it's one of the coolest places on earth. That's unlike that nobody lives at And how do.

I see this?

Is it just mired the like did she shine this episode? Like she just looked like she was glowing off the screen.

Okay, let me tell you this. I think she's gotten prettier with each episode. The more you get to know our personality.

Is that it is that what I'm feeling.

Okayah, I feel like I'm getting You know how when you're attracted to someone and you get to know them, their personality rocks. Yeah, they get more attractive to you. This even applies to like front chips. You're like, you see, somebody's soul obviously is beautiful. They come across as more attractable on the outside. And that to her. That's happening to me with her.

Okay, I felt it this episode. I've always thought she was a front runner, at least since we started watching the show, But this episode, I was like there's no question, Like there's something about her this episode that is jumping off the screen at me where it's like there's no like he has to.

Fall in love with this girl.

Yeah, yeah, it's it's an incredible.

Dynamic between the two of them.

There is still the element of faith, and so that's the big storyline going into this.

And he makes one.

Of the most obscure statements at the beginning of this date that I've ever heard.

Okay, he said that he was scared, and that she said he said, I'm not scared, and then it was like blah blah, blah blah, and then at the end he was like.

Well I'm scared. It was like the biggest one.

He says this statement, I'm still someone who sometimes likes to have a drink and.

Have oh so fun, have fun. Oh my god.

And I was like, dude, wait time out, buddy. I think you've been great Grant. I think you would be a dude that'd be great to hang out with. I feel for you. I want you to find love so bad. Let's say that the fact that you at any level are questioning if people of Mormon's faith don't like to have fun, if that is a question to you. Somebody needs to like shake you right now and say, hey, Mormons can still have fun too, buddy, Like they still

That is so funny that that rang in your ear because that was something that like I chewed over for a second as well. Yeah, I'm like, okay, So this is just him kind of indirectly.

Saying I have no clue what's going on in this face. No, no, no, no.

To me, it's like being having fun means like doing like sinful things like getting drunk and hooking up.

Oh so he's going to old school like evangelical route where he's like sex, drugs, and alcohol are gonna be talked about every youth group in the same like funnel and those three things are gonna be associated together for the rest of your life. So if you are gonna do anything like sex, drugs, and alcohol, if you're gonna think about anybody inappropriately, if you're gonna drink any alcohol, if you're gonna do any drugs, then like that's what fun is.

But is he wrong in the sense of the Mormon faith, like that stuff doesn't go on.

Really, he's wrong. They don't drink at all, right, not traditionally. No, But I also don't think that drinking and fun are equated. Like I'm trying to have plenty of fun without drinking.

Yeah, that's what I'm trying to say.

It's like sad to equate them.

Yes, like not that you be shunned. And I think her family and we'll get to this did an incredible job at reassuring him that if he enters into the family without sharing the same faith tradition, he's still widely accepted and there's arms that are going to be thrown around him in love. So let's like preface it with that. But the fact that his mind goes to, wait, I still like to do these things at times, and that's what fun to me is, I think is the bigger question here.

Okay, okay, yeah, I see that.

I and I also just wish.

I think the only thing I think of this day and the only criticism criticism I have of Grant within this day, and it could have still happened this show didn't maybe show it is I want him if this is a really like a concern of his if this is his, like, I want him to ask more questions about it, Like I want him to sit with the dad and be like, can you tell me more about like what it is that you guys practice, What would be important to you as I stepped into a relationship

I think he would get.

Some clarity and probably get some peace of mind on that he can still live his life in a way that he finds fun.

Without you know, sacrificing the acceptance of the family.

But that was a wild statement, and maybe it's just because like faith and religious practice is such an intrigue of mine. Is when he started by saying, you know, I have my concerns whatever, whatever, I still have some drinks.

I still like to have a drink, and I like to have fun.

And immediately the drink thing didn't affect me as much as the fun thing. And I'm like, you think Mormons don't have fun, Like, look at this family. Look at this freaking family. They love each other.

When somebody says to me like, oh, I like to have a good time or I like to have fun, I'm like, Okay, who doesn't.

That's my It's always been the way that I find people coded say I like to party, like I like to drink a lot and get a little rowdy, unless you're my.

Wife, who never drinks, and her idea if I said, like, what do you think is fun, she would say, like going for a four mile run, coming home and.

Watching a movie with my husband. Literally, that would be same.

That's my fun, except for the run part, more of like eat on the TV with my husbands.

But I think it's most people's coded way of saying like, I like to party.

But anyway, I think it's interesting that you and I both held on to that line so much, and I wonder if they intended for that to cross people's minds or whether it's just like a throwaway concerned that he was just going to air out and like it's no big deal. I personally think that it was put in there for a reason.

Because.

My gut is telling me that this is going to be a bigger deal for him in the long run, and when it comes down to making his final decision, this is a huge factor in it. He's like, which lifestyle can I jive with more? Even though I may feel it more with that girl. I don't know if I could do this lifestyle. That's my guess.

There's a few things that they come to mind here, and I do think this is worth spending some time on, Yeah, because I think she's going to be a front runner. He said some things. Then this is why I wish Grant would ask more questions in the midst of this kind of conversation, because I think he's an intelligent dude. I don't know what he feels comfortable asking and not asking within this environment, and anybody I know that's Mormon

Religious studies.

One is he says, hey, but we still have like the base faith the same thing, right, Yeah, that's cool, Like so we're good.

I'm like, that's true, Like.

That isn't wrong, but like that's not the whole scenario, right, you have to ask more questions to understand what exactly that base faith looks like, because I want to know Grant from you, what is your base faith?

So that's a big deal.

His feels more like very general on the surface, and for her it couldn't be more Or is it bad to say the word niche?

It's I think niche. I think niche. Well, no, I think niche and concentrated. There is a face system, So I think what you're saying is like there is a system in place that her family follows that is very specific in particular to.

Why they believe what they believe.

I don't think they're not going to be accepting of Grant, And I think he should have heard that during this whole family date, and I think that was very important for him to hear, is that, Hey, you can come into this thing man, like we're not asking you to convert. We're not asking to do anything more than love our daughter and help start this family that we so believe in and love. That's the baseline here.

Can we just say how in interesting it would have been if he would have said, am I expected to convert if we're going to get married?

I think it's really great question.

I know, an amazing question for him asked is what are the expectations of me as a partner? Because the worst case scenario would be that he is surprised by this at some point in his life. He's just not asking the questions. And I do think it probably comes from a place of concern. Is what can I ask and not ask?

Yeah?

And I think that's very fair. Like Faith has a lot of like you're fearful of. He kind of see it when the whole family comes up and he's like, all right, who.

All here is related?

He was definitely like is there possibly like multiple wives?

Yeah, He's like wanting to ask the questions.

Do I have to have five kids?

Like he should have just asked them to the father because the father was such a welcoming place and it felt like in that situation, anything that was on his mind, he could have asked, like, hey, I like got myself stuck there at the beginning when everybody come out to me and been like, who's all related here? That fine question, great question, But at some point he has to dig

Here married to each other? Oh?

No, that's not the case. Okay, cool, Like why have I heard that my whole life? And then somebody could explain it to him. Yeah, well, you know, like why is his family so big? Like that's the fun part also though, and I don't want to take this for granted, it's the fun part of like falling in love with somebody is you get to be be curious about their life.

Listen, so maybe he'll ask it what he's more comfortable.

We are also not maybe giving him the benefit of the doubt. Perhaps he asked this, he certainly was contemplating it and maybe felt like it wasn't even appropriate to talk about on TV mm hm, you know that's fair or maybe not on the first meeting, which I agree, like on the first meeting of a family you would never talk about things like that.

This is just like a bachelor exception.

And let's also give Grant some credit where I think we've see in the next day, which we'll move on to now.

Except for can we talk about the grandpa moment.

I love the grandpa.

The grandpa was so which we established he's an oil typhoon.

Yeah, we've we know about him.

He's so wealthy, he's so sweet.

The way that she told him the secret of like that she was following for him and then he didn't hear it, and then she just whispered it again.

It was just like the realist, cutest moment.

Well, and it's the grandpa I want to be because his response to her wasn't oh my gosh, I'm so excited for you. He's like, I hope it's going to work out, and like there was a wisdom in every word he said to her, I wish your grandma could be here. I haven't seen you be this way with

And how sweet was it when she said, like, you know, he's different than my dad was, the dad that passed away when she was three months old, just absolutely tragic, and he goes, yes, your father was so easy to love?

So is to love? Oh?

Okay, final thought on this date, and this is where my lack of religious knowledge comes in. The mom is in having a conversation. They talk about fantasy sweets, and she they talk about fantasy sweets, she says, if he's you know, intimate with anybody else, it would upset me, which I think we see is going to be a.

Storyline for the next episode for sure.

I felt like the mom handled this in a way that I did not expect by saying, have you actually thought through this? Are you willing to Like I don't know what her words were exactly, but it's like, pretty much, are you willing to give him the benefit of the doubt and open your mind to whatever happens in the fantasy suites because this is such a unique week now.

Sounds like the mom would not necessarily encourage her to shut off if he's intimate with anybody else, exactly like if he was to be the mom wouldn't hold that against him necessarily.

That's what I took from it.

That's what I took from it, and I thought that was one and a healthy perspective from a parent. We don't hear that very often. So I was like, Mom, kudos to you. This is such a weird week, Like what an amazing like mindset you're giving your daughter. Not that he should be, I'm just saying that you're leaving her open to make decisions based on whatever happens this

Yeah, an incredible parenting moment that we can all learn from.

Yeah, I agree, totally agree, Bravo, perfect words, Ben.

There we go, all right.

Final hometown of this week was one that fell completely short and obviously left with somebody going home. Didn't expect her to go home this week, especially after the Zoe date. As I said, Zoe is very very much now at this point in Category three. To me, I think there's no question that when it comes to the finale episode, we're going to know who the File two are. If it's not, I'll be shocked. But this date is still something to talk about because that happened this week.

The family is not for this bachelor situation. Ashley.

I'm going to make a personal statement on this. Yeah, that again will probably ruffle feathers.

I think I.

Think there's nothing about I think there's nothing good about parenting. When your child chooses to do something and they've entered into it to where you say I'm not going to support it. I think there's only one way that goes, and that is the child feeling like they're unsupported, which is how she felt this episode. Yeah, no matter if you like it or not, even if Grant has to show up to your house. And you're like, I don't like the fact that you're dating all these other women.

You can sense that, even though she's very confident in her delivery all the time, like this made her feel like a little bit embarrassed and then it's just going to brush off really quickly.

I would have at least wished that some of the siblings she has eleven siblings, and you're telling me that eleven of them were like, no, we're gonna side with mom and dad on this. That makes me.

Sad, That makes you do makes me feel like she is like alone in this, and it makes me really wonder her decision to go on the show.

She had to have known that her family was so against it.

Well that's the big question, right, So at some point this conversation had to have existed between them, and she chose to still go on the show even without anybody's support.

That's one red flag. I would say.

The second red flag is that, yeah, eleven siblings and like nobody else wanted to show up to support her.

I think that's not a good move. I'm confused by this whole situation.

And it felt like it was confusing to her too, And it did bring insecurity into her, especially when all the other women are talking about their dates and she's in there being like, I'm the only one. They didn't have anybody. I had my friends and I went to a pumpkin patch. Yeah, and I tried to make the best of a really bad situation.

Dina, if you're listening this, I mean this to make you feel better. You were going to get eliminated either way.

I think she sees that now, No, you're right, do you know what I mean?

Like if your family did show up, Like, I still think you were going to get eliminated, and maybe you've been a toss up between you and Zoe, but like you were making the top two.

What made me feel really awkward about this?

And I know this is maybe tomb but like it's a hometown episode, right, so you kind of think that you're gonna do what you would do in your hometown,

This is not even like a tradition of hers during the fall.

Well you heard it, it happened late. I'm guessing the show like on the way they heard that the family actually wasn't going to do this, and they're like.

What do we do now?

Okay, who has five hundred pumpkins that week? And by put up a sign invite the friends, let's figure something out.

I know.

It did feel disconnecting.

I think with your word's there actually like if she heard this, it's not not true, and I think she sees it now, right, So, yeah, she wasn't going to win this thing. It's good that she went home this week. There's no issues with her now. He loved the idea of Dina. He was like, I love her passion and her like drive.

It's like very attractive, but like he didn't feel romance toward her.

No, But it was a weird date. It was a date that felt unnecessary. She could have said, Hey, Grant, how about this, I'll fly to you. How about you and I have a day together, and I'll introduce you to five of my closest friends in the city that we're going to fly to. This felt unnecessary, and it felt very much like the producers were thrown off guard at the very end and they had to figure this out.

And then my last comment is that this is also maybe ridiculous, but like if it didn't happen at a pumpkin patch and it happened at a bar that they go too often, I would at least felt like that was home here.

I'm with you.

Well, at least they could have drinks. The rest of this episode exists with Joey and Grant sitting down. Not a lot that comes from that, other than Joey giving him some sound advice on how to process the next steps in this relationship. Then we do see the girls catching up and Dina feeling at that point like she's

Yep.

Like, we say that with such confidence and we're not spoiled. No, and guess what's happening next week, guys, because this, as we said last week, this season is two weeks shorter than a typical Bachelor season. But guess what we get next week? Women tell all because we needed to put that there.

It was it was so necessary.

It was way more imperative than Grant having another week of dates.

I don't get it.

It's so weird. I know it's cheaper for them, but whatever, we don't need it.

We absolutely do not need two hours of a non really not that dramatic season being recapped and squawked at.

But we'll watch it. We're gonna break it down right here. It's almost fantasy.

We will be here, you know we will. We don't love that one, but we're gonna be here. And I guess that's it for this episode. We appreciate you guys listening to us every week until next time I've been Ashley.

And I've been Ben. We'll see you next week.

Bye.

Follow the Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous podcast on iHeartRadio or subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts.