The Santa Clause - Part 1 with Grace Thomas

we're covering the movie This Social Network. And then January will be in New York for the Brooklyn Podcast Festival at the Bellhouse and we will be covering Black Swan. And finally on January will be in Philadelphia at Good Good Comedy Theater and we will be covering The sixth Cents. So a lot of dark and eerie movies on this little tour. More details and ticket links are on our website beckelcast dot com and click on the live tab

for all the information you need. The other thing we have to mention on this episode is that at this live show, we talked for so long about the movie The Santa Clause that we decided to split this episode up into two parts. So this is part one that you're listening to right now, and we are releasing part two tomorrow, so stay tuned for that. Until then, enjoy part one of the Santa Claus On the beck Del Cast. The questions asked if movies have women? And um? Are

all their discussions just boyfriends and husbands? Do they have individualism? The patriarchy? Zef invest start changing it with the beck Del Cast. Hi, welcome to the Beckiel Cast. Oh, we're so excited. So we're we're in Denver, Colorado. Ever heard of it? We're so give it up for yourselves for coming out to night man. My name is Jamie Lofton, my name is Caitlin Durante, and we are the co host of the bettel Cast, the show you're currently at. Did you know, by round of applause, who listens to

our show? Oh? And now for a moment of tension, who among you does not listen to the bettel Cast? No judgment. Brave, brave, brave, brave, brave, each and every one of you, not allies? Okay, thank you so much. Hates women? Wow? Incredibly you all hate women? Okay? Um, yeah, no, thank you for coming. We we hope to convert you. We're gonna what is that move? A clockwork? Orange where you just know, that's kind of what this experience will be like. Yeah, uh so if you don't know, we

talk about the representation of women in fees. We use the Bechtel test as a jumping off point to initiate a larger conversation. And the Bechtel test is a media metric created by cartoonist Alison Bechtel. It's sometimes called the Bechtel Wallace test. Yes, thank you, you're welcome, and uh. A movie will pass the Bechtel test if two female identifying characters with names speak to each other about something

other than a man, can we demonstrate? Okay, so this is an example of an Academy Award winning scene between two female Hi, Caitlin, Hi, Jamie. All good scenes start like this, Kitlin, did you know that Santa Claus is a woman? Oh? Wow, now you know? And seen it's kind of like that. The best part of the Bechtel test is it doesn't have to even be good. Writing truly is a fair minimum metric, and so few movies

pass it. It's incredible. I think arian A Grande should rewrite her God Is a Woman's Song as Santa Claus as a woman. For the holidays, hasn't I stand for Ariana, which is the most embarrassing thing about me. But she has I think the horny ist Christmas album out of all of the I mean, she has it's for all holidays, but it's it's very it's like, whoa, you know, you don't think you're gonna like turn on this music and be like I need to have sex immediately, but you

just really gets you somewhere that you aren't expecting to go. Okay, yeah, highly recommending are in a grande holiday catalog if you're looking to spice up a relationship or if you're you know, just out there looking for someone, just just turn it all and people moths to a flame. Sure, I guess hard and I think most of that past the Bechtel test, assuming the sex you'll be having is not with a man, so which is always for the best. So he said, yeah,

that's that's our that's what our podcast is. And now we get to I think we've chosen what I think is indisputably a feminist text. Oh yeah, it's really it's genuinely really hard when we're doing holiday movies because none of them are about women. Is truly alarmed. Um, Jamie the Princess Switch on Netflix, starring Vanessa Hudgens. But we already did that. We did, we did, and then we're going to do with the new one, the Oh the Night before Christmas, but night spelled with the case. It

will be a classic. I like that. Vanessa Hudgens has just been like I am in charge of this gen right now. Like she just is really take I appreciate the take charge attitude. No one asked her to do it. She just was like, there's room here, and she's right. Her agents are probably begging her like please don't say yes to this other one, and she's like, no, I'm doing I'm doing this one for the story. It's so I mean holiday movies. I have not to bring it up.

This is the time of year where the masses they revolt. Because my unproduced screenplay, Santa University, still hasn't been produced. It's been I wrote it in two thousand twelve. It's five hours long. It's if you haven't it's a musical. But the best part is it's about Santa University. Right, so at university where Santa's go, Santa's of all very inclusive university. Here's a twist. Only one Santa graduates a

year and the rest die. It's because it's a good it would be people would lose their minds for this movie. They don't just die, they kill each other. They kill each other. I'm sorry. They don't die of like illness. They kill each other. It's very violent. You can and it can happen to anyone at any time. You know. It's really and the lead character is I think the most. It's just there there, you know what a woman went

at the end. A woman becomes the one true Santa, which is great, but then also she has to be killed at the end of the next year because that's how Santa University works. Anyways, that's the movie we're discussing today. Close very classic. We're discussing today is the Santa clause uh Tim Allen vehicle. Very successful. Clap it up. If you have seen this movie before, okay, and a round of applause. For those of you who have not seen the movie, Wow, are like listening to the Bechdel cast.

But I've seen this everyone. We were just talking about in the lobby that I think that most people have seen this movie, whether they like it or not. Like it's a movie that is very hard to avoid. It's true. I like everyone has seen it. I mean, I'm it's a feminist text. I mean clearly. Well, let's bring out our guests to join our conversation about this feminist text. She's a Denver legend. She is. She's a very funny comedian. She's written for ClickHole. Give it up for Grace Thomas. Hello,

thanks for being here. Microphone was on the chair and not the floor. So Grace, tell us about your history relationship with the Santa Claus. Yeah. Well, every time I've seen listening to Clause movies for the first time, someone has died. Oh well, like later, I thought the first one with my as gonna say, what is this Santa University? I saw the first one, in the second one with my dad, and then he died a year after the second one. Coincidence. I think third one with my cousin,

and she died this past summer. I'm sorry for It's fine. I'm joking about. And I think it's in a deep state sense. It's certainly all connected. I think it's definitely connected in a deep state sense. And I questioned why I haven't been compensated. It really does make you think, Okay, so you've watched them the movie, you've seen all three. I've seen all three. Has anyone else here seen all three? This is a powerful mythos. This is more powerful than

I could have imagined. We have not seen. I think I've seen all three at various I couldn't speak to all three, but Grace, you can speak to all three. I certainly can. I just rewatched the Anti Claus too, like two hours ago, by coincidence, I had that scheduled months ago, which in Santa Claus Do is the one

that if he doesn't get married, Christmas is canceled. R yes, but it is also the one where a copy of Santa Claus, a toy Santa Claus, is made, and then he militarizes the North Pole, or so the movie would like to suggest. But really the North Pole has already been militarized because in the very first scene, Santa Claus, like there's an oil plane going over the North Pole checking for oil, and they have to like make sure that this oil plane doesn't detect the North Pole, because

I guess their magic doesn't cover that in particular. And Santa Claus pops up and he declares Elf Khan one Santa Claus, not the toy Santa Clause tim Al in real Santa Claus is enough in full military regalia with medals and one of those floppy hats. The whole thing. They were waiting for this day. They already had, the pieces were in place. You know. It's like how people say, like Jimmy Carter was anti war, Well he didn't know. We've been waiting to talk about this is It's not.

It's not like he melted down. The takes, you know, they were still there. So it's elfkn one, it's alf Khan one. It's okay. The oil plane just keeps going. And then flash forward a month later there's this we see anti He's made all these toy soldiers and he's going to attack all the world with coal. Oh okay, it's eerily prescient considered considering that the Iraq War was

declared Mary a few months later. This is like Christmas two two is just long enough for it to be post nine and be like we have to get into production right now exactly. That is alarming. I don't love it. In Santa Claus movie, do they have like the alert color system? They're Elf Khan four is green and then it goes yellow, orange, red, red. I think it's good they made this. I mean, I think it made it. I mean this movie. I'm pretty sure ended that war,

didn't it. As a child, I don't think I would have been prepared for the War to Rock if I hadn't seen the Santa Clas because morn that that war was declared. My mom woke me up at like five am. It was like, honey, we're at war, and you were like,

what do you mean war? And then I already knew and she's like, well, it's kind of like the Santa Claus to exactly like sant Like, oh well, then Santa Clas will get married and the conflict will be resolved, and sure, okay, and then Santa Clas three is Martin short is Jack Frost, and that's all I remember. Yeah, Santa Claus three. It's called the Santa Claus through the Escape Class and it's a very controversial entry into the cave because it's revealed in the Santa Claus three that

the Alps have just been gaslighting him the whole time. Wait, how they've been telling Santa Claus for years that like he's he's locked into Santa Claus. You know, like when the first movie, they're like, Okay, you signed the contract, that's it, You're Santa right. But it turns out in the Santa Claus three the escape clause if he if Santa Claus holds the snow glow, that m that David crumples. If ye Bernard game to Charlie in the first movie, if he holds it and says I wish I was

never Santa clause, time reverses, She's never Santa Claus. So you could just undo the whole cannon. Yeah, that simple. I would revolt. I would like, how do you say that the sex one saw style revolts the whole all. I would be like, this was this doesn't make any sense. Okay, but is it a good movie? Um? You know I went to it with my uncle and I hadn't seen him in years, So it did a positive thing. That's

very good. One of my favorite. So the we were talking about this backstage, but the budgets for the Santa Claus movies are extremely influx where the first Santa Claus movie that we're discussing today is stupidly successful. It has a two million dollar budget and it makes almost two hundred million dollars, which is why everyone has seen it by law. Right, So the second one, they're like, all right, people want this. They they triple the budget. It gets

sixties six million dollars for mostly for the military. I would imagine they spend so much time in the North Pole that one maybe doesn't do as well, but it's still ripples. It's budget, but you know they're they're like, okay. And then the third one, the Escape Clause, has an eleven million dollar budget, and that's the last entry into the cannon. Yeah for now, for now, you're right, you're right. Is it really doesn't have much of an extended universe? No,

very contradictory. So, long story short, you're very into the Santa Claus. Yeah, I'm pretty much into any movie I saw with my dad before he died, pretty much. Okay, and then you and you have the most comprehensive knowledge, and I think a power. Yeah, I'm an oracle, yes when it comes to the Santa Claus. All right, well, we're so glad to have your expertise here. I have a giant book that I've written all of this down in the language only I can understand is just the

funniest person that gosh um, yeah, fucking follow that. I grew up with this movie as a child. It came out when I was eight, and I watched it a lot from probably ages like eight to ten, and then I haven't seen it since. How about you, Jamie, I've seen this movie a lot of times. I think I was too little to see it when it came out, but I had seen all three of them. I think I've only seen the second one maybe five times, and the third one just the ones. Um, I've seen this

one so many times. Can I ask you to one quick question? Did you ever see it with someone who died later? Or is it just great? It may, in fact be, but I think to maybe make you feel more comfortable, I would kill my brother seen it with anyone who died later? Yes, the curse is real? Your dad, that's great, A good connection. We'll talk. I really liked this. It was like one of my favorite holiday movies growing up.

I had a very nasty, nasty crush on Bernard the el Hi right, Bernard the You're like white man with dreads I shouldn't write, And then yet, like a moth to the flame, I do. I keep going back. I keep going back to him. I was looking for like an oral history in this movie. I'm like, who was the one that was like white guy with dreads right, Like, it's just nothing about the character demands that I would be shocked if it was written into the script. And yet there he is, and I was like what I was?

I was really hot for Bernard and my mom. I remember that Grace and I were talking about this earlier we saw. I saw the first two where I definitely saw the second one in theaters. I remember going because it was I think an eight year lapse between the first and the second and the first one, Charlie is like he's like, you know, seven or eight, He's like his cute little kid with a bowl cut. And my mom did that horrible thing that mom's occasionally do where

he was like a teenager. And my mom leaned over to me at the movie theater and was like, wow, right, I had some young man. He's becoming. Like she was just trying to force the narrative, maybe because she was like, please stop drinking off to Bernard. She was really pushing the Charlie North. But I wouldn't be tricked, and I would I would still let Bernard go down. I mean, I think Bernard looks very non binary. In my opinion, I think he looks very like I think he looks

like a him lesbian. You know NB icon and nb icon for sure. I just I just want to bring the home. Yeah, Bernard is who I just want to know hashtag who decided the dreads? But I yeah, I really like this. Do you think that Bernard just got the like David Krumholtz just got the last wig they had? Like, this is how it works out a movie side. If you come like, you get the last wig. Ok, this is what you can like. And the worst part is it's cannon because in the sequels he also has the dress.

They didn't need to be like an eight years later. Wait, so if he's in the sequel in this world, the elves are children and they don't age, but he would have aged like eight. They do age, though, that's the thing that's what angers me so much. But well they age very slowly. They do. But like Curtis in the third movie, I think is played by the same Curtis as second Helf, he's a kid, and he's a kid in the first one, right, Yeah, and then he's coming back.

I think it's the same actor in the thing. Wow, good for him. But like in the first movie, Judy's like I'm years old and then Tim Allen hits on her. Yes he First of all, it's one of the grossest scenes. It was that scene. You're just like, who is this for? Because she's played by a child, and it's like, oh, like nine, Like Yeah, when I was a little kid and I first saw that movie, I remember seeing that scene and be like, oh my god, I hope they get married. This is the start of a wonderful story.

And people say media doesn't it is wild that Tim full and flirts with a child. Yeah. And in my memory when I hadn't seen it for a while, I thought she was an adult. I thought she was like the one adult. Let me see it again. And she's the youngest of them all. Yea more of a child. It's it's pretty alarming. Well, should I do the recap? Yes, this is gonna be I mean, there's so much feminist lord to discuss in this movie that Hi everyone, Hi,

I'm about to do the recap. But before I do, I just had to sneak backstage in the middle of the show. Because I'm just so excited to tell you about Casper. I hope Jamie doesn't mind that I just left her out there, but I again simply have to tell you about Casper, a sleep brand that makes expertly designed products to help you get your best rest one

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All right, So here we go. It's Christmas time. That's what I wrote. Good starting, good Start than we meet Scott Calvin. Two first names suspicious right, we don't never trus a mama. Two first names Jack Ryan. Also Tim Allen has. Tim Allen has two first names right, and he sucks his hell. What does that show you? He works at a toy company in the sales department. I think, um, he is divorced. He and his ex wife X Laura Laura.

I was writing her name is Linda in all of my notes because I feel like that's such a common his wife name that I just phoned it in and I was like, honestly, I was pretty close Laura. And then they just break and they looked a camera like you get the idea. We're not going to tell you

what her job is. So they have a son together, Charlie, who spends Christmas Eve with Scott because his mom and new husband Neil Neil Judge Reinhold, they're having dinner or something and Charlie is not invited in some of the most I think of my childhood, some of the most effective in movie marketing of all time, when they go to Denny's, because there were no Denny's near where I grew up, and I was asking my parents for years,

what is Denny's? Can we go? And and then it was like a big deal when we finally got to go to a Denny's. And it's so horrible. It's the sight many are you kidding Perkins? Okay, No, Denny's. Denny's can Perkins ass any day? Have you ever been to a Perkins? Wait? When I knew okay, the moment where I'm like, you know what I'm doing okay in life is when I would go to Denny's and be like, I'm going to get off you know, the off the two F six eight. I'm like, I'm gonna go, I'm

gonna go off the six menu. I was like, I'm a millionaire. What I think the audience should know is that Jamie, you and I go to Denny's together a lot. And it was no but I was so oh, like, I was so excited to go to Denny's. And then I on the rewatch, I was like, oh, they really were going for broke on this Denny's endorsement. Tim Allen leans into the corn. He's like, it's an American institution, Denny's.

And then they have a horrible time back on that first because not only does the Denny's hardly have anything like that's true, Charlie goes in there. They want to igno, but it's so busy and Charlie doesn't enjoy his time at all. So, if the big wigs at Disney were trying to promote Denny's with this felt they did a horse ship job worked for you. I was like, I

asked to go for fourteen years after. I think it worked for me because I really wanted to go to Denny's for a long time too, and my mom would refuse because again Perkins was an option. But they go to They go to Denny's in it's It's great, yeah, and we love Denny's. Here on the Betel Cast, someone's gonna tweeted us to be like Denny's is problematic, and like, no, you know, we know everything's the word and he's just canceled. I take it back. Okay, So Scott is not the

most invested parent. He like puts in a little effort. He burns the turkey. They go to the Denny's iconic when he burns the turkey. Yes, I feel like there's a in a mythical way, yere again again. I would watch a ten hour loop of extinguishing. I take it almost suggests that maybe there was some force was setting him up. Do you think that Santa Claus targeted Scott Calvin. It's like, I'm over this job. I think that any person with the initials see they're like they're unnoticed. Sarah Connor,

Sarah Connor, think about it, Santa claus coincidence. I think two things. Really what There's a shot when Santa's on the ground after he's followed and at Scott and Charlie are trying to figure out what to do, and there's just one shot which doesn't look like any of the other shots in the film. It's like this weird. I went to film school. I say briefly that I did. I didn't graduate, but so if you didn't, then that

must mean you didn't go twice to film school. Like I don't like to bring it up, but I did get a master's degree in screenwriting from Boston University. I hate to mention it. Caitlin's addicted to flaunting her debt. I think that's beautiful. I'm twenty thous dollars in debt with nothing. Wow, I've got some good stories. Yeah, a student observation. This is student observation. So there's this shot, Santa's on the ground. It's medium medium shot. Okay, I'm familiar. Okay,

that's weird about it. But I don't know what it is, but it looks weird. Okay, that's that's a medium shot is the term I was prepping everyone for telling them I went to build school. But but what happens in it in the missinman is Santa like raises his hand for a moment and goes, oh, yeah, very that was I wrote that down. I'm like, was that the last thing he did before he died? And so I think it suggests that he'd show was like. I think it

suggests that he it was his choice. And and Caitlin brought up something excellent on the drive here, which is that we learned in the Santa Claus too, although I guess we learned in the Santa Claus three but none of it matters. But in the Santa Claus too, and addgital clause is presented that unless you have a his wife, Christmas is canceled, which means that the Santa who falls off the roof and dies in the beginning of this movie would have probably had a his wife. And where

did she did? She? Is her life force tied by Santa and then she also died in that very moment, Sarah or think about it? I like, I think her name is Sandra Claus and she either died in that moment or she just gets like austed. They're like, um, your husband's dead, You're not welcome here anymore, and they like ban her from the North Pole. We don't know though where there should be an extended universe and we

should get a spin off a Sandra Clause. Brady is available, Yeah, Sasha Baron comins, but I'm just looking up a list of is that Stephen Colbert, think about it? Simon Cowell? Who else do we go? If you're if your initials in the audience? Thank you? Does anyone here have initials? A C? One person? Okay, Santa show yourself. I can't believe Santa came to the show. Thank you for coming so exciting. Um, that's all Steve Coogan, alright, And finally

Cheryl Crow sure think about it. Santa Clause. She goes to bed with her MONOGRAMD pajamas and then her kid comes up to her like, wait a second, sorry, what's happening in the movie. I don't even know. Um, clearly there's not much for us to talk about, which is why we're stretching. It's feminist Tim Allen pushing someone off a rufus feminist. He doesn't know. I'm still trying to process something you said earlier. I have to say you were.

You two were making fun of people with two first names, and I would just like to quickly remind you that my name is Great Thomas, and I'm not I went to film school and i'd have had some respect. You and Jack Ryan have my eternal respect. I'm so sorry. Queen's Jack on the show with Jim from the Office. Yeah, but this time he got a gun. All right, So back to the Santa clause we were in in it too,

where he's truly okay. So they go to Denny's. They talk about whether or not Santa Claus is real, and Scott wants Charlie to believe that Santa is real, even though he is an adult does not believe in Santa. Now it's the middle of the night on Christmas Eve and there arose such a clatter on Tim Allen's roof and he plays. Charlie is like, he's really good in the movies, Like it's a clatter he's and then he grows up and my mom is like, whoa, but in

this one he's cute. Yeah, So Scott goes outside to check on the clatter and Santa is on his roof. He accidentally startles Santa Claus and he slips off and falls off the roof and dies or progress does it on purpose, it was playing. It's like such a hot take. It's like how in the Dark Night Batman is trying to get like Harvey Dent to like be the new like crusader against crime, so that he doesn't have to do it anymore. And I think that's the same thing

that's happening. It's probably a similar amount of people tie throughout the course of the film. So Scott reaches into Santa's suit and finds a business card that says, if something should happen to me, put on my suit, the reindeer will know what to do. So then he and

Charlie see the reindeer on the roof. They notice Santa's body has now vanished totally fine, totally normal, and his suit is still there though so and then a ladder appears, suddenly arose such a clatter company still funny, still funny, And they climb up onto the roof. The sleigh is up there. They both get in it, and Scott's like this is stupid, but Charlie's like, we that classic father Son dynamics, and then the reindeer take off with Scott

and Charlie in the sleigh. They go to the next house that was apparently on just the Santa agenda, and Scott reluctantly puts on the Santa suit and the like magical bag of toys takes him down the chimney, which in some of the most cursed special effects you'll see. Yeah, just like, let's render Tim Allen barely. It's so scary, it's very alarming. I also did not notice until this rewatch that the reindeer are like puppets. I thought as a kid they were full on, real amazing reindeer actors there.

And then there's it's fart jokes for the reindeers close up of hens and workshop making fart noises, and like, yeah, that's what this. That technology was a metaphor. So he goes into the next house. He puts toys under the tree. This is the one where like the little girl is there and he's like, funk off, little girl, yeah, fuck you yeah, and she doesn't notice that her house suddenly has a fireplace. Then it goes away that is the second house, the second second Okay, I'm sorry you asked.

I didn't want everyone to get burned online, which happens to us all the time. The first one has a fireplace like usual, and the second one even though it is an identical house there side by side, and they're identical houses, but this other one doesn't have it, just has a little pipe. Yeah, thank you for Santa. Santa makes it work because I think the film very artfully takes takes you into its mythology, step by step over the big levitate him, and then you see the transmogrification,

not all at once. It's world building at its best. I mean, folks, these are the writers of Space Jam. They know what they're doing. Oh yeah, they know what they're doing. They're skilled artisans. So Tim Allen what's his name, Scott Scott and uh he and his son do this over and over again, with house after house all night, and then they finally are taken to the North Pole where Santa's workshop is, and there are lots of elves, their children, but they're a million yes. And then this

is when we meet Bernard. Did you did anyone else here? Also? Think Tim Allen was hot? Because some people just say, right here, I do in this movie as Santa Claus to Santa Claus, Ship's sale that. Yeah, and you know, I think that I kind of idolize him a little, like not to Mellen as a person. But it's got Kelvin, you know, the character. We've been we've been pretty critical and the film is pretty critical of his parenting. Pretty Santa Claus. But at least he's not a raging I

call it, you know, that's true, which is pretty good. Yeah, I think that's maybe a low ball. I think it's a perfectly adequate yardstick. Yeah, you know, and this is not to be you know, like I'm in recovery. It's like cool if you're an I mean, you know, I'm not saying that you're a bad person if you're an alcoholic. However, personal experience pretty hard to be a bad parent. If you're a raging alcoholic, that's a tough one to pull off,

you know. Also, Charlie gets two houses. I had a two bedroom apartment and a one bedroom apartment up this is I mean, this is like yet another because we we recently recorded an episode on Home Alone. Uh and it's yet another like upscale like white family living in Illinois, specifically in November and December. Like there's such a specific vibe. Why are they always in Illinois? It was filmed Toronto.

Are people afraid of people thinking they're Canadian? Everything was filmed in Vancouver and Toronto and they're like, no, it's Chicago. You're like it isn't. That's okay, let's accept it. People are evading taxes, right, yeah, Charlie, what is something? Well, Okay, I guess we'll talk about it more in depth. But I did like about this movie is like one of It was definitely one of the first movies I saw that like treated a divorced family as something that was

like normal and there wasn't a villain the story. It was just like clear that these two people didn't belong together. And then the mother got remarried and it was like difficult, but it was okay and uh and like everyone loved the child and like, I don't know, I thought that was that didn't even like register with me. It's like, oh that is cool. Yeah yeah, And like Charlie is

not like messed up from having divorced parents. No, now he has a free therapist even you know, I remembered them being harsher on Neil than they actually were, to tell you the truth, they are surprisingly light on Napal. There's like a couple of like things at times in the film where he's like a little bit of feminate and that's the joke. But beyond that, and you know what I mean, that's bad Chrissy all the time. For

the most part, it's five. Yeah. I mainly remember the sweater burn sweaterburn very very clearly, and I think I just was like, oh, that must have happened a lot. It just happens the once. And Neil is not a villain in this story, Like he's misguided, but he loves Charlie. He wants the best, and he doesn't he doesn't hate. He's willing to work with Scott. I don't know. It's generally frustrated with Scott's behavior. And wait, Scott is saying he is Santa Claus, and that is a tough pill

to swallow. But if Neil had just used his doctorate and thought for a second that sc this guy is a doctor and he can't figure out that Scott's Calvin equals Santa Claus, unbelievable. Also Scott Calvin hates mental health because he keeps being like, Neil isn't a doctor, He's a psychiatrist, but it's always like the most resistance against mental health before you fully embrace, like you know what, it's time. The film also seems very confused about what

a psychiatrist is because I've been to many psychiatrists. I've never had a psychiatrist spent more than ten minutes talking to me about like my feelings and like theory around psychology. They're always just like I think that they I will continue to give you well you dread, and I love that for them because I need it right. But there, yeah, I think that they thought that like a psychiatrist and

a therapists are the same thing. And then also a therapist could gaslight a child and that's fine because there's like that scene with Neil and Charlie. Were Neils like, so you think your dad is Santa? And then like slowly begins to ask these leading questions that lead up to like, so what the fuck is your problem? Just like Neil, you're doing a bad job. You're doing your bad job. But before we it there, we're now in

minute about twenty of the movie. So they're now in Santa's workshop and Bernard, who I guess is like the head elf. He's like he he tells Scott about the Santa Claus with an E. And this is the point of the movie where you realize they came up with the title first and then they reverse engineered a story around it. That's when a bunch of like parents in the audience I think they're smart, go oh, they figured it out. But the Santa Claus states made me want

to be a lawyer. I'm a lawyer because of the s didn't achieve that dream, but you did go to art school a little bit. So the Santa Claus clause states that if something happens to Santa Claus and he dies after he's fallen off your roof, and you put on his suit, you become the new Santa. I think this is one of the most inventive pieces of I p ever created. Who what SICKO? If you kill Santa,

then you're Santa. That's like a horror movie. It's almost like this has to be a Crimson fairy tale, right it? And it gets scarier as it goes on because in the second movie it's and now you mus procure a woman. It gets like scarier away to the west of the North don't live with you for all your days? Wait with her dreams? Who does he end up marrying? In the second one? Does he rob a woman of her career? Yeah? What? What?

Who does he the principal of Charley's High school? And then later she becomes a teacher in the North Pole. Oh second, a second after in the North Pole. You know, maybe she think I'm the superintendent of the North Pole. Wouldn't be stopping her career of up. Also in the third movie, we find out that yes, all elves look like children, but there are also new elves being made that are also look like children made born. Maybe I

was like construct somehow I know. It seems from the second scene to Plase movie, it seems that it seems at the North Pole doesn't have the ability to clone, right because he clone and would have had to make a toy Santa, they could have just made a cloone. Santa suggests that yes, these child alves, these actually young elves, that they were born, they were born and from where this is why we need a fourth movie, been saying it for fourteen years. How are the elves Born. How

does it were? I don't know what's happening, all right. So Scott he he doesn't want to be the new Santa, and but it seems like he has no choice because of this binding contract. And Bernard tells him that he needs to report back to the North Pole next Thanksgiving and until then he can just kind of live his normal life. Yeah, Bernard will hold it down. He's like, don't worry January through October. I'm daddy, thank you. The more we talk about it, I think less invested I'm

getting in these films. The thing is a huge plot point of the second film is they make the Toy Santa because Santa doesn't trust Bernard to hold down the fort for literally twenty eight days, because that's how much time he has to find a wife. It's just twenty eight days. That's like the same plot as the Princess Diaries. To also pretty much it is it's like, if you don't get married this month, the country split. Let's get back. Sorry, it's quite all right, So what's let's see what's happening

in the Santa Claus. The Scott wakes up in his bed and he thinks the whole thing was a dream, but Charlie insists that it was real, and his mom and stepdad and teachers and everyone in school concerned. He has the pajamas, so he knows, somewhere deep down you've done that it was real, right, But he's in denial about it. He thinks he just had a weird dream about flirting with a kid. Little does he know that's the only night of his we see it's there, like

maybe this is a thing. That's so everyone's concerned for Charlie. And then some changes start happening. I would call this the midpoint of the movie with my master's degree. Like Scott start scanning weight, his hair starts to turn white. He grows a beard that like even right after he

shaves it, it grows back. Uh, And he's looking more and more like Santa Claus, which freaks out Laura and Neil because they think that he's doing it on purpose to convince Charlie that he's Santa Claus, which would be alarming. Put yourself in their shoes, yes, well, but their sweater if you will. This I mean, this sequence is I think one of the most iconic sequences in film is I think, like so many films have tried to copy it, for instance, Evan Almighty and others. My favorite movies Almighty.

And so the parents are concerned earned and they petitioned to get soul custody if Charlie and take away Scott's visitation rights. Um. But then Scott shows up to Laura and Neil's house anyway, I think on Thanksgiving after he has visitation rights revoked, because you know, men be showing up places, men be showing up wistfully at the pane of glass. At least he's not making threats. And again, at least he's not a raging alcohol I mean, everyone,

please Scott Calvin's graces hero, So let's be gentle. And Scott really doesn't know what to think anymore. He's like, I look exactly like Santa Claus, But am I Santa Claus? And then Charlie's like, you are, and if you don't be Santa Claus, you're gonna let all those kids down there counting on you. And then he's like, okay, I

am Santa Claus. And then Bernard shows up and it's like time to get to work, honey, and then they all leave, men be snow Globe comes back, which is a concert you in all three films, and the same plot happens, where like near the end of the film, the snow globe shows up and it shows someone that Santa Claus exists. Like in the second film, it shows his prospective wife that's like she She's like, you're not Santa. You're just making fun of me because I told you

I used to believe in Santa. That's so upsetting, weird way to make fun of someone, and very reflective of how she feels about him. But then Charlie in the second film shows her the snow globe and as soon as she sees the snow globe she's like, it must be magic. He is Santa. Oh yeah, I one of my favorite moments. And then the third one, the snow globe is used to go back in time to undo Santa, but also it's used at the end of the film to redo Santa. So is there time travel in Santa

Claus Three? Yes, there's extensive time travel and it changes the whole world. But Jack Ross converts the North Pole into a theme park. Unbelievable. I can watch it. I have Disney plus now brags. Yes, yes, we love to give them our money. I also have it. So Bernard shows up and then he's Scott and Charlie. I'll leave for the North Pole. Uh. And now Laura and Neil think that Charlie has been kidnapped. Because he's been kidnapped is why they feel that. And I didn't realize this

as a child. But Charlie is gone for a whole month, from the time from Thanksgiving to Christmas. Eve never seen the film. Dear Zachary. Yes, God, wait, why would you bring that up? Oh my god, because I just want to say another good thing about Scott Calvin. Dear Zachary. Spoiler Like it's a documentary. It's the saddest documentary I've ever seen in my life. Oh my god, this is baby and the same is Zachary and his dad probably got murdered by his mom. And then the mom kidnaps Zachary, right, yes,

she sure does. It's so sad. She kidnaps Zachary, then kills Zachary and then kills herself, right yes. And a lot of times when a parent that doesn't have custody kidnaps a kid, then they die in some way. But Grace is repeatedly citing history's greatest monsters to demonstrate this. Calvin, isn't this after It's not a bad day. I'm having a panic attack. You're not wrong, a wrong. It's true, he's not a raging alcoholic son. He didn Santa clause, but he didn't. Again, I contend he did not. It

was in the cards. So he have duck, but he have ducts Charlie for a whole month. There's an extensive police investigation. I feel like the movie intentionally doesn't call to attention how long he's gone. I've seen this movie a million times until Caitlin told me earlier today that it was a month that I realized. Yeah, you were like, it's a night, right, Yeah, because I barely rudely insisted

it was a night, very rudely, and I'm sorry. And then Caitlin presented her evidence that it was clear that I was wrong. Well, because he's objected right around Thanksgiving on Thanksgiving and then has returned on Christmas Eve. Yes, it's scary, it's right. Oh and then like at the end there's a very different what movie we're comparing it to where you can see in the shot right before Scott comes back, and it's like just kidding, I'm actually Santa,

which is a great twist. Uh. But like Laura and Neil are sitting at the kitchen table, she's clearly at the end of her rope. I'm like, they're about to divorce each other. This is the worst thing that they lost, They've lost their t and then it turns out the spirit of Christmas brings them back together and they're not mad. They're not mad at They're not mad. They're like, Charlie,

welcome back. I want to know an interesting thing, I'm not sure so so in the Santa it's interesting that you brought that up because in the Santa Claus, through the escape clause, when it's kind of like this is the most specific um actually never being I'm not even I'm not like, I'm not I'm not what I'm saying here. What I'm saying here is that in the in the in the in the timeline where Scott Calvin never becomes

Santa Claus and Jack Frost becomes Santa Claus. So in the timeline when Scott Calvin has never Santa Claus, Neil and Linda Laura but spiritually Linda, Neil and Laura's spiritually Linda divorce. So in a world where Scott Calvin never became Santa Claus, they do get divorced. No, yeah, I honestly think that Laura is better off without either of them. I like, but um, I guess I'm not as upset

as I lead on. I think Laura should tell us what her job is and that we should be able to learn some facts about her, and that her, like her child stepdad, shouldn't be the one that is pushing for like custody decisions. Right that I was like annoyed at Neil or Neil's like, it's the I am a doctor, and this is the way it has to be. And I was like, it's not. He's not your son. You

don't get to your call. Yeah, and then Laura was like I didn't get a board game, and and then and then they're like about her as far as we know, that's that and having her son abducted are her top two problems. Another thing about Scott yea so in the second film and don't call it a movie in front of Grace, she'll get very upset called a saga. If there's a meeting of the council of like a mythological being which I remember this and Father Time notes that

since Scott became Santa, kids are seventy percent happier. He's one of the best Santas of all time. So explanation why Laura didn't get that game is that the Santa before Scott was real bad at his job. That was like, that was like Carter era Santa. That was car Liker. Sure, I just don't think he's a hero, and I think that his choice in Santa's really reflected that. Yeah, they agree. I don't know if you if you all know this, but we're privy to some very explositive information. The president

chooses Santa. Yeah, and a different clause that's a that's just a different if you shake this snogo up at doesn't count, but technically that is the law. Yeah, and that's why Scott Calvin is kind of a bipartisan here really, because he's sued for administrations, including that real Loopie one going on right now. Yeah, well, we haven't seen Scott Calvin since Okay, I'll push back on that. We haven't seen Calvin since the Bush administration. Listen, Jamie, you've gotta

believe in something. I think that all. Yeah, well, I guess he came to prominence during the Clinton administration. He lasted through the Bush administration, and really, you know, I think now we really need them now more than ever. I agree. See he's able to work within the system. You know, there's something to be said for that. Yeah, he's changing things from the No, he's not. The thing is Tim Allen voted for Trump, and that's something we

really need to. I know everyone's hissing through their teeth, but it's like we have to. We have toss it every We can't talk about buzz Lightyear without being like, well it is you know what. I bet Scott Calvin also would have voted for Trump had he not well, he was rich, he was very Christian market, he's at the very least fiscally. Do you think Scott, wait, let's clear this up. Let's clear this up. Do you think Scott Calvin would have voted for Trump if he had?

I agree with you. If he hadn't become Santa he would have voted for Trump. But I think Santa Claus like he became, he's like Medicare for all. He's probably like he's probably like, yeah, well, I don't know I would give him that much credit. We the show has been going on for an hour and we were not even done with the recaps. So how well it Well, we're we're at the end. But yes, we're at the end where they prepped for Christmas Eve. It Scott a k fully fledged Santa now, and he's accepted it. He's

accepted it, he's embraced it. He and Charlie are out delivering presents to the kids and then they stop at Laura and Neil's house, but the police catch him and arrest him, which I totally forgot that happened, to say, I totally forgot that. And I also forgot how the North Pole like dispatches the squad of like swat elves, okay elves with attitude, and I think that's kind of a desert stormy thing. Yeah, sure s track I love and they're like, we're your worst nightmare elvesd editing. I

know I said that to him. It's like, whose kid was that? Why did that kid get to be? I feel like that they had and no disrespect. I mean, if you were one of the Alps with attitudes slide into our mentions, please the show there. But but that to me had the energy of like a crew member's kid. You know, every one of those kids has a degree from U c. L A. Now, well, these elves with attitude break stand out of jail, and then they go

back to Laura and Neil's house. And even though he's kidnapped Charlie for a month, like we said, Laura Neil are just like whatever. But from this perspective, they still think that Scott is like delusional And then suddenly apropos of absolutely nothing. One of the best line reads in cinema history, because it's Laura and she says, oh my god, you really are Santa clause you know, that line wasn't

even originally in the movie. The actors who was the actress that played Laura, she was I'll get her name, but continue. So she was just on set and saw Tim Allen dressed up at Santa emotion just overcame her and they happened to be rolling, and that's what she said, you know, in person, oh you really are Santa. And

they were like, we gotta use we got. Her name is Wendy Krusen and she is in all three of the movies her Well we don't need to go well, yeah, but yeah, there's no like catalyst in the story that gets her to be like, oh, wow, you are Santa Claus. I guess it's magic. It's it's magic, magic and belief. Caitlin so sorry, And then Neil Neil apologizes to Charlie, which I liked. He's like, I'm sorry, I didn't believe that Scott Colvin is Santa Claus. I see now the initials.

That makes sense. But then he immediately bag pedals on what he just said and he was just like, oh no, he's like making us by into this huge delusion. But then like a few moments later, Scott Calvin, who is a good Santa Claus whistle and the mystery date game and a soccer whistle to Charlie, which I guess he wanted. I guess he asked. Right before that happens, the best moment happens, which is Laura takes the custody papers and then she throws the custody papers into the fireplace and

she's like, there you go. You've got your custody back. And it's like, legally, he doesn't, don't. It's it's mystifying that they were able to navigate the courts well enough to take his custody away, but they didn't know that, like, oh, you don't get to that decision right the law. But I mean, I guess it's all kind of mood because then he just flees to the North Pole permanently. So

and that's the movie. That's a movie. That's that was the lying around and then everyone's like, wow, it really is Santa we it's really it's all real that the Santa Clause. Al Right, everyone, that's the end of part one.

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