The stars have spoken and celestial forces have aligned as Trixie and Katya gaze backwards in time through the planetary veil to Episode 8 of RuPaul’s Drag Race Season 7. According to famed Houston Chronicle astrologer and self-proclaimed inventor of tangerines Madame Claire Voyánt, this was the episode where destiny shuffled the queens into roles both triumphant and tragic, their fates written in glitter across the firmament of the universe. As foretold by the primordial deity Uranus, the cosmi...
Sep 02, 2025•55 min•Ep. 230
A storm of lace bodices and shattered dreams erupts as Trixie and Katya revisit Episodes 5, 6, and 7, where the workroom transformed into a bloody battlefield and destiny itself teetered on stilettos. Katya, radiant yet tormented, recalls the soaring ecstasy of comedic victory before plunging into the abyss of crippling self-doubt, her every glance a silent scream for redemption. With the dual crucibles of Shakespearean tragedy and a sinister Snatch Game, crowns were forged and egos were obliter...
Aug 26, 2025•1 hr 11 min•Ep. 229
This evening's Auberge du Bald prix fixe menu opens with a velvety consommé of critiques simmered to perfection as Trixie and Katya revisit Episode 4 of Season 7, ladling out a slightly tart first course of humiliation and an amuse-bouche of sweet nostalgia. Before the main course, light humiliation is flambéed tableside, its acrid smoke mingling delightfully with champagne bubbles of self-deprecation. For the main course, the producers and RuPaul are folded into the cassoulet de canard with rar...
Aug 19, 2025•1 hr
Today’s forecast predicts a heavy downpour of sewing machine mishaps, zipper malfunctions, and a strong chance of Ru's outsize expectations. Expect gusts of flimsy excuses sweeping in from the west, as poorly constructed gowns struggle to hold their structural integrity. A cold front of judges’ side-eye will move in by runway time, dropping both temperatures and morale. Listeners should prepare for a full-blown storm of admonishments, expletives, and ultra-dramatic pauses, interspersed by the oc...
Aug 12, 2025•59 min•Ep. 227
On the latest Drag Race Season 7 reminiscence, Trixie and Katya relive the transformative chaos of Episode 2, where challenges were confusing, tensions ran high, and eyebrows ran even higher. With unfiltered vulnerability, they unpack the emotional exfoliation brought about by both success and failure, as well as the subtle art of absolutely destroying a group acting challenge before celebrating with an evening fingering at the hotel. They explore the power of radical self-compassion, even when ...
Aug 05, 2025•1 hr 2 min•Ep. 226
You are cordially invited to the first Drag Race Season 7 Reminiscence, a decadent audio dégustation featuring Miss Trixie Mattel and Madame Katya Zamolodchikova. The first course is an amuse-bouche of backstage trauma, served slightly chilled with a reduction of self-doubt and chicken coop wigs, as the dolls recount their entrances in RuPaul’s Drag Race Season 7. For the main course: tender morsels of personal revelation, seasoned with delusion, resilience, and the subtle bitterness of un-reimb...
Jul 29, 2025•1 hr 11 min•Ep. 225
Live from the Svalbard Global Seed Vault, Trixie and Katya dodge reindeer traffic jams and a military parade led by a literal knighted Brigadier penguin named Sir Nils Olav, all in a valiant effort to bring you yet another episode of Scandinavian insanity. From a brief symposium on recreational pharmaceuticals to midwestern high school reunion etiquette to the questionable morals of restroom telephonic engagements, Trixie and Katya continue to be the undisputed hardest-working-talking-into-micro...
Jul 22, 2025•1 hr 39 min•Ep. 224
Live from the historic Djurgårdscirkus theater in Stockholm, join us as we dive headfirst into the frosty fjords of Sweden! From government-funded moose warning signs to the national obsession with fermented fish that smells like Satan’s humidifier, it’s a smörgåsbord of Scandinavian magic! The dolls dissect Sweden’s bizarre love affair with coffee breaks (yes, “fika” is mandatory), their legally protected right to sunbathe naked on someone else’s lawn, and the insanely scary haunted house at Gr...
Jul 15, 2025•1 hr 40 min•Ep. 223
The otherworldly icon herself, Tammie Brown, returns for another deliriously unhinged chat as the trio dives headfirst into the sky-high rents of Provincetown, the socio-political effects of pube-dying, and why Tammie was quite literally born for reality television. Expect cosmic wisdom, hard-boiled egg recipes, and at least one off-topic rant about Hugh Hefner's canine predilections. Planning a Summer trip? Your home might be worth more than you think! Find out how much at https://Airbnb.com/h...
Jul 08, 2025•1 hr•Ep. 222
The break-up was rough, but looking around the house, the realization hit me: enough time had passed. The house felt hollow, the memories mere echoes as the walls finally exhaled. It was time for a new beginning. A new dawn that can only commence at the ultimate church of eclectic, spirited commerce: World Market. I started small—replacing our antique China with vivid Moroccan flatware that seemed kissed by the sun, swapping the boring coffee table with a teakwood piece who's carved inlays most ...
Jul 01, 2025•54 min•Ep. 221
Ninntenndo America, Inc. Announces Two New Pokémon Arriving in 2026!: Trixioohh is a deranged Fairy/Plastic type Pokémon evolved from a cursed eyeliner found in the haunted Ross store on La Brea Avenue. With moves like Wig Whip, Slander Pulse, and her apocalyptic signature attack Nuclear Eyebrow Gluer, she crushes enemies into submission and leaves behind a sticky residue of THC gummies. Katya Zamoirrra is a Psychic/Trash/Unstable Gas type who doesn’t evolve—she erupts in an explosion of movie r...
Jun 24, 2025•55 min•Ep. 220
Calling all señiores and señoritas! Book your tickets today and soar above Mexico City with Beyoncé’s Balloons: the only luxury hot air balloon experience where altitude meets attitude! Founded by Trixie and Katya after a prophetic Katya fever dream involving an Aztec King, a singing churro, and Ben Franklin's kite, float gracefully over ancient Mesoamerican pyramids, swirling Mexico City traffic, and the emotional ruins of your last throuple. Each ride includes a Beyoncé-only playlist ( NO SKIP...
Jun 17, 2025•58 min•Ep. 219
Have you looked in the mirror lately and thought to yourself, "Ewww..."? Well "Ewww" no longer, friends. Come on down to Bald’s Gym! Where abs are churned, not earned, and you sculpt your body not into a Greek god, but into a glistening, viscous tub of full-fat Greek yogurt. Let us show you how to go from stick to thick! Forget Mt. Olympus—our clients ascend to Mt. Dairy, oiled and trembling with pure probiotic power! At Bald's Gym, we make your thighs creamy, your arms custard-like, and your co...
Jun 10, 2025•59 min•Ep. 218
Lords, Ladies, and Theydies! By royal decree and under the ever-watchful eye of our potentate and monarch King Emmanuel Podcast IV, Esq. — prepare thyselves for a presence most prodigious and profound! Now entering the Bald & Beautiful Grand Hall of the Dolls...we present to you: the Duchess of Deadpan, the Empress of Eccentricities, the undisputed Queen of Comedy, KRISTEN SCHAAL! Follow Kristen: @k.schaal and check out Kristen's podcast at: https://www.youtube.com/@TheExtraordinarians Trave...
Jun 03, 2025•1 hr 5 min•Ep. 217
If you need answers about your past life, we're here to help. As we gaze into the swirling mists of the unknown, we're seeing you. Not "you," but rather a past you. You're wearing a funny hat and white stockings. You're Henry Picklethorpe Wigglesworth IV, the Viscount of Golden Balls, Oxfordshire. Your estate, Hairy-Knob-upon-Fanny-Bottom, was famous for its 27 chimneys, haunted marmalade cellar, and the location of the only documented UK marriage between a man and a swan. You routinely bathed i...
May 27, 2025•53 min•Ep. 216
Do you love the idea of space travel, but hate the color blue and happen to be super gay? Introducing Pink Horizon! The universe’s first fabulously queer space exploration company. Final frontier? More like fierce frontier! Ooh there ain't no other way...to the cosmos, that is! Powered by science, pride, and just the right amount of interstellar trimix, we're gaying up the galaxy one phallus-shaped rocket at a time! Pink Horizon: to the Moon, the Goon, and beyond! This episode is sponsored by Be...
May 20, 2025•51 min•Ep. 215
From the new OUTtv series Wish You Were Queer , Michael Henry and Tim Murray regale Trixie and Katya with epic tales of suburban cruising permits, the epicurean superiority of Chili's, and a hook-up debate as old as time: to chomp or not to chomp. Don't miss the May 22nd premiere of Wish You Were Queer on OUTtv! Make progress towards a better financial future with Chime! Open your account in minutes at https://Chime.com/BALD To check out Google Gemini, go to: https://gemini.google/students Get...
May 13, 2025•53 min•Ep. 214
Greetings, you luminous kitchen sprites! Today, we’re embarking on a journey — not just of baking, but of awakening your lifestyle & fashion demon through the delicate magic of edible flowers. Because why just eat cake when you can also accessorize it? STEP 1: DON'T GET YOUR BEGONIAS IN A BUNCH To avoid a trip to the E.R., avoid begonias and instead find manufactured spiritual enlightenment with freshly-picked rose petals, pansies, or marigolds. STEP 2: CLEAN THOSE FILTHY FLOWERS Rinse your ...
May 06, 2025•53 min•Ep. 213
In the depths of the city of angels, where devilish sinners prance, There live two drag queens, luring innocent souls to Gomorrah with their twisted dance. With rainbow flags flying, amidst the woke chaos no one can hear, The cries of good 'ol Americans drowning their sorrows in watery domestic beer. But down in the South, where mint juleps flow like water and the bayou air is pure, The laws of the Crawdad and the Bible are the only cure. So put down that wig, makeup, and butt-plug, and travel w...
Apr 29, 2025•47 min•Ep. 212
Chunky or creamy, innie or outie, hot or cold, tall or short, spicy or mild, text or call, sweet or sour, clean or dirty, gentle or rough, baked or fried, wet or dry, pizza or pasta, confetti or glitter, loud or quiet, elbows or knees, sparkling or still! Whether life serves you lemons or lemonade, give yourself a kiss today, 'cuz honey you were born some way. Consider hosting your home on Airbnb while you’re away, as your home might be worth more than you think! Find out how much at https://Air...
Apr 22, 2025•52 min•Ep. 211
As we enter the final lead-up to Easter Sunday, let us all reflect on the many blessings we have in our lives, including the magical marshmallow carbohydrate bombs: Peeps. This Lent, download CruciPeep from the App Store and join Peeps devotees from all across the globe in our special 2025 Bald & Beautiful CruciPeep Challenge! For the week leading up to Easter, make Peeps a part of every single meal while you pray to the nutritional gods of Red Dye #3, Carnauba Wax, and Potassium Sorbate. Fr...
Apr 15, 2025•49 min•Ep. 210
In a world where Amish tradition meets secular temptation, six Amish youths will be tested like never before. Watch as these impressionable young adults from Lancaster County are thrown into the outside world where their innocence doesn't stand a chance. From the barn to the bar, this ain't your Uncle Jedediah's Rumspringa. This Summer, Tee-El-Cee Network presents a journey from farm to filth. Stop churning that butter and throw away that bonnet: it's Extreme Rumspringa! Sundays at 9, only on Te...
Apr 08, 2025•49 min•Ep. 209
Is your spouse sick of your night terrors involving narrow driveways and parallel parking? Does the thought of merging onto a freeway during rush hour make your perineum perspire? We here at The Bald Driving School are here to help. With dozens of days of driving experience, our two instructors will guide you through blinkers, beeps, blind spots, and barefoot driving techniques. The Bald Driving School: if you "Can't" drive, we'll teach you so you "Chaka Khan"! Give your cat the food they deserv...
Apr 01, 2025•55 min•Ep. 208
Dearest Trixie and Katya fans: it has come to our attention that ye, the huddled malodorous masses of the proletariat who worship at the altar of our eternal magnificence, have come to the falsely-held belief that encountering us in a public space grants you the privilege of speaking to us, thereby forcing us to acknowledge your meager existence. In many cases, the most squalid amongst you have risen to unbelievable heights of insolence and requested that we engage in the appallingly putrid act ...
Mar 25, 2025•58 min•Ep. 207
This Summer, visit beautiful Australia and experience Brisbane’s sights, sounds, and especially the smells! You can island-hop by helicopter, hike to hidden waterfalls, or relax at one of Brisbane's acclaimed new restaurants! Explore the city with your mate as you sip spritzes atop a rooftop bar, down pints at a craft brewery, or order cheeseburgers and fries with a side of automobile adhesive at Macca's! You definitely won't have memories that last a lifetime after you take a magical olfactory ...
Mar 18, 2025•54 min•Ep. 206
In a historical socio-political context, "appeasement" is defined as a diplomatic negotiation between parties where one party makes political, material, or territorial concessions to the other party (the aggressor) with the express intention of avoiding conflict. While we will never admit that the blue set exemplified anything but unadulterated aesthetic perfection, we grew tired of seeing you heathens leave copious numbers of comments calling the gorgeous shade of blue an ocular crime against h...
Mar 11, 2025•1 hr 3 min•Ep. 205
Blueberry season is on its way and this Summer, prepare for that special vacation to Disneyland by clearing out your tired old mocktail recipes, your social calendar, and your stomach contents! This week we're making our signature non-alcoholic weight-loss aperitif, "Katya's Berry Bad Decision". It's a refreshing, subtly sweet concoction filled to the brim with blueberries, mint, and regret; all mixed together to get you the Summer beach-bod of your dreams! Ingredients: ▢ 1 cup blueberries marin...
Mar 04, 2025•47 min•Ep. 204
From the makers of The Fast and the Furioustest and 2 Fast 2 Fastiest comes the highest-octane installment of the hit movie franchise ever! When convicted felon and secret drag queen Jonathan "Turbo Titties" Callahan (Trixie Mattel) tries to start a new life on the south side of Milwaukee, his obsession with street racing sets him on a collision course with the head of the Wisconsin criminal underworld, Brian "Boo Boo Butterfinger" Baker (Katya Zamo). To survive an icy crash in his Dodge Intrepi...
Feb 25, 2025•57 min•Ep. 203
I believe in one god, the Noodle Almighty, maker of marinara and meatballs, of all pasta visible and invisible, born of the semolina before all ages, fettuccine to fusilli, ravioli to rigatoni, bucatini to capellini, begotten, not overcooked, perfectly al dente, topped with parmesan for our salvation, he came down from heaven, and by the spirit of a stripper, touched his noodly appendage to her, thereby creating a beer volcano, in accordance with the scriptures. He ascended into heaven, and is s...
Feb 18, 2025•48 min•Ep. 202
Do you ever glance over at your partner and feel like they're a million miles away, both physically and emotionally? While we all know that building a connection is hard work, it also requires vulnerability and a willingness to accept your partner as they truly are. But with your weekend already full of buying groceries for Jenny's scouting jamboree, carpooling to Michael's Taekwondo steamed vegetable social, and making sure little Damien stops pinching the dog's privates lest Spot rip his cheru...
Feb 11, 2025•56 min
