I was very happy because this is a lifelong dream mind to be a father, and I love my wife dearly, and there's no 1 in the world. I think that like, we need more replica of, you know, more than my beautiful wife Kristen, and I was thrilled. Welcome to the art of Father hood, a podcast that takes you on the journey of father. Now here's your host, art eddie. What's going on? Everybody already to hear for another edition of the Art Father podcast. I'm
very lucky to have this gentleman on. If you listen to the band Oa, you you definitely know who this gentleman is. It's now the Ben Ge. Thanks for taking the chat, miss Sarah. How are you doing? Hey, I'm great. Nice to connect with you here, are. Thank you. Yeah, man. We're gonna be talking about father and we would talking about your great podcast. What could be bad talking about, you know, wellness and mental health. And the and the things that people kinda go through.
And I think parents know that they've experienced, you know, just tough times whether it's mental health, they're just being well and you wanna make sure you're there for your kids. So... And, obviously, my family and our a big fans of your music that we're gonna talking about that as well. I know you guys are on gonna be on tour. You're gonna be hitting my neck of the woods and I believe in July. So flipping forward to that. But let's talk a little bit about your father at journey.
When you find out you're gonna be a dab What's was going with your mind, man. Oh, man. That's a funny story. First of all, I don't know what kind of language you allow on your podcast. But I still remember my wife's face. It was 1 of those like, okay. Well, like, let's see what happens. Let's give it a try. You know, and and, like, the next day she's walking down the stairs with I'm pregnant. And, you
know, and I was alerted. You know, I was very happy because this is a lifelong dream mind to be a father, and I love my wife dearly, and there's no 1 in the world. I think that... But, like, we need more replica of, you know, more than what my beautiful wife, Kristen. And I was thrilled. You know, I was absolutely thrilled, but I was also scared of my mind because my wife didn't seem too happy about it. But it was more of the shock that it was happening than her actual, like, you know,
pleasure in getting to be a mother. She's certainly grown into that role incredibly, and I'm very blessed that she's my partner in this thing. Awesome, man. I love that. No, again, like, the fact we saying, we need more, you know, versions of her in the world. That's great. I love that. Talk a little bit about the values the core values. You're looking to in instill to as he's grown up? Yeah. I think most importantly, I want my son to have a very keen sense of morality.
And I want him to be empathetic. I want him to be understanding and tolerant and be able to listen to other people and he's 5 right now. So he's not really doing any of those things, But I'm certainly happy that I have the opportunity to teach him, and I hope you know, I'll I'll get to you know, pass those traits on to them as he grows older, and that's
the challenge. Right, is that you know where they are is not where they're gonna be, and you have to stick with the program, and that's what we're doing. Love it, man. Yeah. And so you're talking about things you wanna teach him. Let's kinda flip the script. What is something that he has taught you either about yourself or about life maybe didn't know was there until he became a dad. You know, he's he's taught me about, like, patience and and, like, having
a greater purpose other than myself. You know, like, like, being patient enough to realize that as part of it, being patient enough to, like, be there for him through that is a a whole other side and you know, my health journey that has basically been the better part of his life has also taught me that, you know, I need to like, like, treat myself well and give myself what I need so that I can give him what he needs. And and there's a real
art to that art. And I I've really, like, challenged by it at times because I I have physical health issues I'm still dealing with, and I also have like, mental health challenges, and trauma from my physical health issues as well as just general anxiety and depression stuff that comes from the the the life I lead. And so, yeah, I I'm constantly, like, learning through him about all of that. Love that. Yeah. I mean, again, sorry to hear all the stuff that you're going through.
But again, That's alright. That's fine. It's life. We all had I up. I know it comes out on escape. You know, That's true. True. True. Yeah. But, like, it it's good that you're seeing, you know, the things that he's teaching you in you're using it to your life. Right? And and to making sure that you're in the best place you possibly can be. So the fact that you know, that that old prove, a child to lead them. Right? It kinda goes hand in hand with what you said.
Yes. I I definitely appreciate that. And like you said, your child, you, you know, it son's 5. So I think you're perfect for this. Dad hack or piece of advice for new dads listening in this. What would you offer to them? Be cool. Stay cool. You know? Like, like, your kids gonna piss you off. And it's like, it's not their fault. Their prefrontal cortex is not developed enough for them to actually process the things are doing. Like, like, remain calm. That's the advice.
So good. Yeah. I mean, I mean, heck, you can even say people ran into that our adults don't have the the full development right sometimes. I know. Yeah. Yeah. Like, even, like grandparents. So... Yeah. It's like for me, like, I'm in my forties, and I feel like I'm kinda of that sandwich generation or a sandwich part of my life for or I'm taking care of, my mom and my wife's mom passed away, but, like, my dad and my 1 Still here, But, like, sometimes taking care
of them. But take... Like, my kids are 16 and gonna be 14 in, in July. But, like, they're they're starting to get more self efficient, but we're still taken care of, like, them and obviously, our desk too. So you're just kind of, like, alright? Who needs help. Right? Everybody. Yeah. Everybody. Again, congrats, you know, you're talking about this the things you're kinda going through and so you... You know, you I think that's what inspired you with your podcast,
what could be bad. And and focus on mental health and wellness. For me, doing this podcast, I feel like I've learned so much from great dads like yourself. For you with your podcast. I'm guessing it's helping you just kinda you know, not solve all the issues, but, like, help, like, find a path that's gonna be helping you out. Right? Totally. There's there's definitely path ways. I'm I'm seeing that other people go through that I can apply to
my own life journey. And as well, like, there's all these little tidbits of knowledge and and, like, even large chunks of knowledge that everybody's sharing with me. And that's kind of the impetus as much as wanting to be able to share those things with other people. It's like, I need help. Like, I wanna learn from the people I respect. And everybody on this podcast I have respect for. And
so there's a genuine exchange happening there. And and the podcast, you know, it's a conversation it's not meant to just be like, you know, q and a, you know, it's like, I'm I'm relating to what my friends and the people on the podcast are are going through. And it's really... It's been fascinating to me because, like, there's the... In the moment exchange, and then, like, you know, As you know, like, you go
back and watch it. And you you learn again, and you pull out these other things like, oh, like, I can apply that in this way. And that's really great that I'm you know, I think having, a constant learning through this whole season and I'm actually looking at, you know, providing, like, subscribers with sort of my thoughts starting now because I realized, oh, like, I'm still going back to the first episode, you know, when I'm driving around, and be
like, I wanna listen to that again. And I pull out these little nuggets that I'm taking with me. And it's really fun to, like, learn Like, I don't think we're here to do much else besides, like, learn and pass that on. So that's really the deal. Great father had, like, vision there too. Your pascal what you have learned. So, you know, you're talk about all the different things you're
taken away. What is something that, you know, for people listening to this might be like, you, I'm kinda struggling with mental health or just wellness. What is, like, something that you've learned that you're applying? You wouldn't mind sharing with my audience. There's number of things. First of all, watch the podcast podcasts because that's what Yeah. You know, it's there for. But, I think for me, like, a big thing that, I guess, I'm learning to do more through this is to
be open. You know, like, keeping all the stuff bottled up is something that you know, it's like a pressure cooker. Right? Eventually, that lid gonna blow off, and that's a real big problem. You don't wanna get there. You wanna be open about what you're going through. And and it's, like, preventative maintenance on a car. Right? Like, you go and you get the oil change before you need to change the oil. Because you don't want to break down. You
know, and that is the deal. Like, that is the the the prime directive of mental health is, like, b proactive or you get in a situation where you you're... You really are disruptive to yourself. And I got there, unfortunately, a number of times, and it was through support. It was through being open. It was through talking about my issues. That really got me to a better place. So that's my encouragement to other people is is to also be, like, gentle with yourself, and it accept
that we all have that stuff. There's no 1II don't care who you are, like, even, like, Tony Robbins or whoever is out there, like, giving everybody the advice, like, he's got stuff. He works through I guarantee. And so I I just think we all need to be mindful that there's no shame in that. No doubt. What could be bad dot com as we you can check out the podcast. Obviously, wherever you listen to this podcast, you can find his podcast as well. Whatever platform that you listen to your podcast.
Again, like I said, my family are big fans of your, view and your band mates at Oa working. I love I go through. I mean, talk about, like, the father had song, like, I mean, I know there's a lot of song deals with family and stuff that you guys produce, but I love that. But also to, the origin store, as you can tell Comic Geek Star Wars you go that stuff, but, like, I love how you guys, and this is this is a testament to
you guys. Like, you guys formed up and, like, middle school in high school and, like, you guys are still together, man. Talk a little bit about, like, and and every... Like, you know, people, like, my daughter, my younger, she plays a Sa phone and had, like, their last night con... They had a concert last night for, like, the final thing. She's, you know, graduating into high school and stuff. But I think, you see it it's great.
Who who are, like, Oh, you know, race, like, the the band teacher she's actually retiring at the end of this year, like, 29 years, but she's, like, doing, like, a little q and a with the band, and she's, like, who's still... Who's like, who formed in a band over this, you know, year in middle school and saw like people are raising their hands. Right? That's when you guys start. You guys are still kicking and do it
all. Things talk a little bit, like, the long Longevity, especially in the music business, how you guys are still, like, you know, it's together and performing. Yeah. It's a gift. It's really rare. I recognize that, and I appreciate I acknowledge that we're, you know, constantly evolving as people, while this happens. So being able to evolve as as individuals alongside 1 another is really special. And, you
know, it's about listening. It's about supporting. It's it's a lot like a marriage or father is that you're you're there for other people. You know, you wanna serve the the group dynamic and, you know, that is not always easy. And, of course, there are moments just like in a marriage where you have, you know, challenges that you gotta work through. But I think we're just the kind of people that really have a, a really, like, good ability to to get there. And, you
know, it's it's a it's moments. Right? Where it's, like, how do we get there and you just gotta talk it out or you gotta have space and these things are just, like, you figure them out as they come up. And I'm just grateful through a lot of my issues that the guys have supported me. You know, I've been really difficult at these past few years, not only physically, but mentally, I'm sure I've not caused trauma them. And it's just like they're still there supporting me, and I'm very
grateful 1 I love them for that. So I think that's part of it is, you know, just being able to love. That's a big part of it. Such a great message right there. Talk a little bit about when you fur... I I know, obviously now, there's... You know, when you guys, you know, started and becoming, like, very popular and I'll stuff the radio was the thing. It still kinda is. I get that. But for different generations, people listen to a podcast like, when do I listen to a radio.
People do listen radio. Like, when you heard like, you guys first song on the radio. What was that feeling like? We are actually having together driving around Columbus, Ohio and it was on 90 79I think W nci. And and we were... I mean, talk about excited. Like, I think the car near us knew something big was going on because we probably sw. But it was it was great. You know, It was like, the, you know, the goal... Like, you you don't have crazy goals at that point. Like, yeah. At
that point, you just... You, like, we just wanna get on the radio. We just wanna play another show. We just want people to show up. It was like these little things that we were just hoping to be able to do together. And then all a sudden, they're happening. So, you know, to be young and to have those things occur, Huge. No doubt, man. Talk a little bit about your creative process when it comes to, you know, just play music, create music and all
that. Is it different from Album the album is it different just in the way you guys work together, but for you personally. Now there certain moments. And now we got technology. Like, you can kinda, like, maybe put some stuff in your phone or whatever have if if you're around and about something to say it inspires you, but talk little bit about your creative process. Well, I gotta liken it to a Jedi
building a lightsaber for you. Oh, so, you know, it's kinda like each lightsaber can be built differently, and they, you know, you could keep building lightsabers throughout your career if you wanted to. But that little magic crystal, the Ky crystal that goes in there. You know, you really wanna make sure it's positioned quite right, and it's, like, aligned with the way the lightsaber needs to function, the lightsabers to
solve. And for us, like, it's really about serving the song serving up the right lightsaber to wield. And yield or whatever. So, yeah, It's it's really... It changes, but it's always meant to bring light and into you know, like, just cut through and, but, like, unified, like, a unified energy. So that's that's my thing. I'm gonna do that for you your art. That was probably hands down. Like, I talked to a bunch musicians. Obviously, you're speaking to my wheelhouse and I appreciate you for that.
But hands now 1 of the best explanations of the creative process, man. Thank you. You got it, brother. Love it. Couple more 2 more questions before finish up with the father quick 5. Talk a little bit about, like, you know, like I said, you guys are gonna be on, know, on tour you guys are, you know, out and about. Do you guys look at touring differently obviously with now have families and all that other stuff Yes. But, like, from the time you started touring to now, like, do you appreciate
it more? I know that there's... I know you you're going through lot of stuff as well, But, like, do appreciate the tour, like, and, like, the fans more just because of the experience that you've had in the past? Yeah. It's only ground. You know, we we love getting to do what we do and it's harder to do what we do because you don't wanna leap home when you got, you know, life happening there that you're actually, like, not present for, and you wanna be connected to
that. I I think, actually, in the podcast, Matt Wallace, talked about it. It was episode 01:03. And Matt says, like, you know, the this the the making of music doesn't... Isn't gonna resonate in his life as much as being a good parent. And that really was something I... I've held on to since then that I need to be really cognizant of all the moments at home and, you know, that
they're resonating very deeply. But in order to continue living my life as a parent and sustaining the lifestyle that, you know, my my family's gotten used to and that I would like to maintain. I need to go out there and do it. You know? And and it's it's a tricky thing. It's like, you you gotta go away from the people you love in order to, like, bring food home... Like, it's it's, you know, it's a lot.
And it's great being out there, but you are connected, and you are apart, you know, and that hurts when you love somebody. You don't wanna be apart from them. I mean, even though my wife sometimes wants to be apart from me. I know she still loves me. She was like, when are you going on, tory? You've been off toward too long. Oh, so, you know, it it comes in all shapes and sizes when you're out there, you love it, the audience that we have, fortunately, is I think grown with us, and, you
know, we love them. They love us and it's very s and enjoyable. You know, there... If it wasn't so joyful. I don't know that we would be still doing it. But fact as it is. Yeah, no doubt. And just again, a big, you know, fan of sports and all that. And just like you know you hear someone like Steph Curry, just like, shooting the lights out from beyond 3 just because he's in the zone. Right? You hear a lot of
athletes being in the zone. Just, you know, I've been to concerts and it's it's fun to, like, you know, see from a fans eye perspective. But when you're out there looking into the crowd, You ever get into the zone, You just kinda feel like, you're just in this, like, different space of time and and and just that because you're, like, hanging out. You're playing stuff you love with you, you know, with your your band mates, But like, what does
it... Do you ever get that in the zone feeling when you're by the stage. Oh, yeah. I do. And I mean, it's hard not to with guys that are such fantastic musicians and who you've been speaking the same language with for, you know, 28 years now. We rep pride ourselves on being able to get this resolved. However, there are distractions, You know, whether they're immediate and environmental that you're in, or there things that are going on
off stage. And, you know, I... Actually, in the episode that's... I don't know when you're airing this. But episode, I'm releasing tomorrow with Steven Kellogg. Who's a fantastic artist in his own right and a wonderful parent, and his faced a lot of these challenges we're talking about. He liken it to, like, like, being on a high wire, and, like, like, when you're in the zone, Right, You're on the high, you're
not looking down. But for him, it's really hard to be on the high wire and and be up there and not look down. He... He's always cognizant of the fall, and it's hard to be in that zone without that. And and I I can totally relate to that because there were times where people are like, hey, why isn't Smiling a bench smile? I'm like, mad right now? I forgot that I'm supposed to be in the own. Yeah. Sorry about the language. Good. So good. Okay. Okay. Sorry. Well, again,
I I appreciate the options. Yeah. Yeah So thank you, ma'am. No deal. Door talk. To. Body now. Yeah. Now he's off the father quick 5. Favorite family movie, do you guys have maybe again, since of his age, maybe it's like a Tv show, but Tv show or family, you like, movie you guys like to watch together. Oh, we... You know what? He's really been into a bunch of them, but I'm I'm gonna go with shrek right now. Mh he's he's been loving on shrek, and it I I have a huge Michael Myers Stan.
I think the guy is, like, he's never done anything I didn't like, and and it's 1 of those movies where it's, like, you see you see the Og, but it's Mike Myers. Yeah. Love it? Yeah. And this is gonna hit your wheelhouse. Is there a favor family song or a genre of music that... Again, maybe at his age, you know, you're gonna weigh a little bit to, you know, introduce them to to appreciate it.
Well, ironically, my kid has been really into, the vanilla Ice ninja wrap from teenage mutant ninja turtles. And I'm I'm really into materials. Okay? The the guy who started at Kevin Eastman, fantastic illustrator and and storyteller and he... He's a friend, and I love the turtles. I've always been a big fan. And so it's been really cool that my kids into it now too. However, ninja wrap is a pretty annoying song. But it... It's like, I can't get mad because my kid is happy, you know, Yeah.
That's it. No... Alright. That's awesome that your friends is Kept like, he's awesome to me, and especially, like, you know, everyone thought of, like, the, you know, the cartoon version the before. They're all... It was the... The comics were black and white. But if there were color versions, they were all wearing red. Right? So it's just right. Yeah. And I love how toy companies, Like, again, being
a collector. Like, they come out with like, the masked turtles of race skull, and they have, like, they morph like hem man characters into like, turtles and all this other stuff. So I'm like, man, it, like, they're killing me right now with Emma. They just wanna make money. Guys. Those capitalist. Yeah. There's just like, oh, we know your kids are like this. Yeah. To describe the perfect family vacation, where would it be? First of all, there's a Nanny that's on
the vacation with my family. And second of all, I think just because happy wife, happy life, it's Italy. Oh, wow. Nice. Very cool. Yeah. First Album you purchased was? You know, I actually think it was It was either... Well, okay. So I just had the opportunity to interview flavor flame for
my podcast. And I will say he... His his tape, the public enemy 911 is a joke is the first 1 that I'll admit to bind because I don't remember the order, But, like, I certainly remember like, saving up money, and it being, like, 1 of the first times, like, bought my own something. Yeah. And so I don't... It wasn't an album and I'm very pro album. But it... That was music that I remember buying at a very young age when I
shouldn't have access... Have had access to something that said, parental adviser. You know, if whatever. So... Yeah. Kids said they don't know that struggle. Like, I remember was trying to get, like. And it was, like, is your mom cool With this. I'm like, mom, wave your hand. And you're like, yeah, Like, Right. Right. Yeah. So go just big click. They just clicked. And lastly, top 3 words, you hope your son would use to describe you as a dad. What would you want them to be?
Excellent, present and Don't know the last 1, man. I'm just gonna stick with 2. Sorry. I didn't adhere to your rules. Yeah. You're the you're the guest. I'm cool with whatever you wanna say save. Okay. Excellent, present. I think those are good goals for father. Where is the best way people can follow you on Social media. Where you most present on on social media. Yeah. I think Instagram is pretty much my my choice. I did start a Tiktok for
what could be bad. But I'm just repurposing the same stuff that, you know, it's like 1 of those. But you know, I... And I hope people will check out what could be bad because it's really a a learning environment and and these are real conversations that I think have the ability to impact people's lives in a very positive of way. And that's an extension of the work that I've done with Oa you know, is that I really want people to be able to heal and for there to be a space where
you can really learn and listen. So, I'm thankful to put that out there. Thank you for helping me spread that word. Art and also just focusing on father and being a good parent is really an important part of our world, and it's great you're spending your time connecting with people and sharing messages around that. So thank you. No, my pleasure. Thank you again for the time. I wish you
and your family continued success. Obviously, people, If you're listening to this, check them out on tour to check out the tour dates and also, check out this podcast at what could be bad dot com. Thank you again, sir. This as a blast. May the force be with you. Awesome. Thanks for checking out this week's edition of the art Father podcast. Please rate subscribe and review wherever you listen to podcast. And also
go to art father dot net. Can have a chance to check out some great articles like the weekly dads doing it right column, the collector of the week and many more. Plus, you have a chance to win some very cool prizes like video games, collectible, all that good stuff. Go to art father dot net, and please make sure you rate subscribe and review wherever you listen to podcast podcasts because Greatly appreciate it to get the word out on the Art of Father podcast. Thank you so much.
Thanks for listening to the Art of Father podcast. Leave a review wherever you listen to podcast and go to art of father dot net.