If you want to want to flourish no matter what life throws at you, you must develop a solid foundation of resilience - but what is resilience, why is it so important to our overall happiness and success in life, and how do we make sure we have enough of it to get through the unavoidable blows to our confidence and self-esteem we all take throughout our lives? What to Listen For What three myths do we hear about in every Art of Charm Bootcamp? Johnny touches on why it’s important to never get too...
Nov 05, 2018•1 hr 28 min
Sugar Ray Leonard is regarded as one of the greatest boxers of all time, but did you know he battled social anxiety and substance abuse during his career? We all face obstacles in life on our individual paths to success, so how can we take a solid inventory of our strengths and weaknesses, surround ourselves with people who support and encourage us, and outwork everyone around us to ensure we achieve the success we want in life regardless of the hand we’ve been dealt? What to Listen For How did ...
Oct 29, 2018•1 hr 1 min
Many of us take listening for granted because we do it all day every day, but did you know there are multiple layers to listening and many of us only focus on one of them - so what does it mean to listen in color versus black and white, how can you vastly improve your listening skills with a few tips you can start using today, and why is effective listening such a powerful skill to have? What to Listen For How can you use silence in conversation to improve your listening skills? What are the fou...
Oct 22, 2018•1 hr 3 min
Cultivating empathy is crucial in developing solid relationships in our personal and professional lives -- but what exactly is it, how is it different from sympathy, why did Michael Ventura found a company based on it, and what steps can we start taking today to work on it? What to Listen For Why getting it wrong is human and how it can enable you to embrace making mistakes. How does being vulnerable help to motivate those around you? What is the core principle of empathy? The seven archetypes o...
Oct 15, 2018•1 hr 24 min
Technology in the digital age has made it easier than ever to form new connections and stay in touch with old ones, but it’s also led to increased loneliness and flakiness as people rack up more screen time and less face time, so why is this, why is showing up so important in deepening your connections with others, and what does showing up actually mean? Unfortunately, you may be paying the price of not knowing what that balance looks like if you’re not making a conscious effort to make new conn...
Oct 08, 2018•1 hr 14 min
In this episode of The Art of Charm, AJ (@AJHarbinger) and Johnny (@AOCJohnny) wrap up September’s month of Emotional Bids. Before answering listener questions, they speak with Andrea Lee (andreajlee.com), an accomplished coach, successful author, and violence prevention expert. From difficult personal conversations to work-related challenges Andrea believes that the RIGHT use of power - “emotional leadership” is crucial as we try to navigate. Without it, we end up with the abuse of power and in...
Sep 24, 2018•1 hr 42 min
On this episode of the Art of Charm, AJ (@AJHarbinger) and Johnny (@AOCJohnny) take emotional bids to the next level by speaking with an expert on validation - one of the most important parts of human connection. That expert is Michael Sorensen, a marketing executive, personal-development junkie, and the author of the best-selling book “I Hear You: The Surprisingly Simple Skill Behind Extraordinary Relationships. Michael shares his own experiences on the job and in his personal life that led him...
Sep 17, 2018•1 hr
AJ (@AJHarbinger) and Johnny (@AOCJohnny) continue the theme of Emotional Bids by discussing practical ways to deepen and strengthen the connections with the people in our lives. Their source for this week’s discussion comes from a Gottman Institute article by Zach Brittle: https://www.gottman.com/blog/turn-toward-instead-of-away/ Whether it’s reciprocating feelings, talking about your day, or even better understanding physical touch, emotional bids help develop human-to-human connection and bui...
Sep 10, 2018•1 hr
In this episode, AJ and Johnny speak on the importance of “emotional bids,” and how to successfully identify and respond to them to create a deeper connection with the people around you. We start with a look at the clinical researcher, Dr. John Gottman and the study he conducted that helped define what an emotional bid is and why it is so important. Then, AJ and Johnny describe how we can positively or negatively respond to a whole array of emotional bids – and how that can make or break a relat...
Sep 04, 2018•1 hr 14 min
Christopher “Drama” Pfaff (@drama) is an entrepreneur, producer, and reality TV star. He is best known for his roles in the MTV reality shows “Rob and Big” and “Rob Dyrdek’s Fantasy Factory”. In addition, he has founded “Young & Reckless Clothing” as well a music production company and a podcast, “Short Story Long”. In this episode, AJ and Johnny ask Drama about his methods for overcoming social anxiety and how to reset people’s first impressions. and how to take advantage of opportunities t...
Aug 27, 2018•1 hr 18 min
In this episode, AJ and Johnny interview Alex Banayan (@AlexBanayan), author of “The Third Door” about his 7-year journey to interview some of the most successful people in the world. Alex shares detail about his struggles to reach his dream and the personal social barriers he had to break down to get there. Alex also shares advice, wisdom, and tricks of the trade from the people he interviewed, Bill Gates, Tim Ferriss, Larry King, and many more. What To Listen Out For What is the “third door”, ...
Aug 20, 2018•1 hr 22 min
How do you take a conversation to the next level and create real connection? In this episode of The Art of Charm podcast, AJ and Johnny explain 8 fundamental steps to develop a relationship beyond just a brief interaction with a stranger on the train, scoring a number at a bar, or a handshake at a business conference. Learn the social cues, the mental tricks, and the right body language to tee up a compelling conversation. The 8 Steps Take from the following article - 8 Insanely Effective Ways t...
Aug 13, 2018•1 hr 4 min
In this episode, AJ and Johnny share stories of how they’ve built connections with others and improved upon them — then explore them from a scientific perspective. In their quest to reach the perfect balance, they talk about how vital opening up the door of introduction is without prying into someone’s life or personal space. AJ and Johnny explain the power of the invite, creating an emotional connection and ultimately helping us all understand the kind of person we’re interested in. As best sta...
Aug 06, 2018•1 hr 10 min
On today’s episode of The Art of Charm we are speaking with investor, venture capitalist, and author—Oren Klaff. Oren has raised over $2 billion by understanding the prehistoric part of our brain (the “croc-brain”). Tune in to this episode to hear Oren explain how this applies to your social skills and sales pitch, and why what’s required in the boardroom is no different than what’s required in real life. CHEAT SHEET What are the 3 priorities of a “croc brain?” What is confirmatory diligence and...
Jul 30, 2018•1 hr 49 min
Our guest is former FBI Special Agent, author, and professor – Dr. Jack Schafer. In the past, Dr. Schafer has developed spy recruitment techniques, interviewed terrorists, and trained agents in the art of interrogation and persuasion. Today, he shares strategies, techniques, and tools you can employ to get people to like you for a minute or a lifetime. CHEAT SHEET What is the friendship formula and how does it increase other people’s ability to like you? What are three “friend signals” you can p...
Jul 16, 2018•1 hr 15 min
“There are no strangers here, only friends you haven’t met yet.” – William Butler Think about it – at one point in time everyone in our lives was a stranger – even our closest friend. Whether we are trying to strike up a conversation at a networking event, meeting someone at a bar, or just talking to your barista, the art of talking to strangers comes alive every day. On today’s episode, we aren’t just discussing how to talk to strangers, but why doing so can improve our lives and increase our h...
Jul 09, 2018•1 hr 10 min
This episode kicks off The Art of Charm’s series on Breaking the Ice. After learning The Art of the First Impression - it’s time to dig into how to start engaging conversations that genuinely capture the other person’s interest. AJ and Johnny walk us through how to devise a strategic plan to break the ice that we can practice and quiet self-doubt and anxious thoughts. Beyond the social science, you’ll get to hear how AJ broke the ice with his girlfriend Amy, and how Johnny’s father broke the ice...
Jul 02, 2018•1 hr 9 min
This week’s Q&A Episode wraps up our series on first impressions, and dive into conversation about style and the art of the first impression with two style experts. LA Based fashion expert and stylist Melissa Chataigne & Real Men Real Style Founder - Antonio Centeno. We also answer YOUR questions on first impressions. CHEAT SHEET How can you create a style that is authentic to reflect your personal brand? How can style increase your confidence? Why is it important to make a powerful firs...
Jun 25, 2018•1 hr 56 min
On today’s episode The Art of Charm is honored to welcome back Jesse Itzler. His first podcast ever was The Art of Charm - and in today’s episode we catch up with him to learn what he’s added to his “life resumé” since we saw him last. Some of our favorite life highlights include: signing a record deal, co-founding a private jet company, a beverage company, he wrote a New York Times Best Seller and he’s just released his latest book, Living With The Monks: What Turning Off My Phone Taught Me Abo...
Jun 18, 2018•1 hr 13 min
Whether we’re meeting someone for the first time or trying to elevate ourselves to that next level—body language plays an integral part in our presentation of self. Listen to this episode to learn the importance of body language in our social interactions, and five simple signals you can focus on to improve your first impression. The Cheat Sheet What are the 5 signals of body language that we can control? How does our environment choose our body language without us even knowing? What happens whe...
Jun 10, 2018•1 hr 7 min
We’re not sure why people aren’t responding to us. We think we’re good at reading people. On today’s episode, we are discussing how to make the best first impression. Whether you’re a CEO trying to better connect with your employees, an introvert wishing to project a bit more confidence, or maybe you judge people the second you see them coming (ps., they see you too) this conversation will provide insights you can apply to your goal. The Cheat Sheet What are the 4 layers of first impressions? Wh...
Jun 04, 2018•1 hr 29 min
Life is improv. There is no script, no directors, no instruction manual for how to be successful. It’s all improvised. So to be good at life, you have to be good at improv. Erin and Suzanne are professional comedic improvisers here in Los Angeles and coaches at The Art of Charm. Listen to today’s episode to hear how they approach the art of improvisation, ]and how we can inject these principles into our day-to-day lives! The Cheat Sheet: What is improvisational comedy and how does it apply to ou...
May 29, 2018•1 hr 3 min
Our perception of reality is dependent on our thoughts. So if our thoughts are infected, then our lives will be too. That’s why on today’s episode of The Art of Charm we are discussing the 10 most common “cognitive distortions”; those irrational and often untrue thoughts that heavily influence our beliefs, decision-making and happiness. Tune in to today’s episode to learn the defense you can implement to avoid your mind’s tricks. The Cheat Sheet How do cognitive distortions wall you off from dis...
May 22, 2018•1 hr 36 min
We all have goals and aspirations, but how many of us take the time to share and vocalize those goals or support our friends as they try to achieve their goals? On today’s episode, we are discussing the importance of accountability. We, at The Art of Charm, often call accountability the “cheat code to self-development.” When you start to integrate others into your personal journey, the social pressure hacks your motivation centers, sending you on the fast track to achieving your goals. The Cheat...
May 16, 2018•1 hr 21 min
On last week’s episode, we dove deep into life’s most brutal truths. This week, we are continuing the conversation with Part 2, where we examine more of the complicated truths we run away from. Here is what we cover: The Cheat Sheet: How does emotional reactivity set you up for failure? What is value and how does it relate to time and relationships? Why is the hamster wheel of achievement a flawed model for happiness? What are people’s most common deathbed regrets? How does celebrating the small...
May 09, 2018•57 min
We all want attention, approval, and acceptance. But we can’t expect others to give us that if we don’t approve of ourselves. Most often, the reason we struggle with self-acceptance is because we are running away from the brutal truths of life. In today’s episode of The Art of Charm, we run the other way, towards those these uncomfortable facts, to unpack and examine them. From understanding that nobody actually cares about you to accepting the finality of death, this episode leaves no room for ...
May 01, 2018•52 min
Are you a perfectionist? Or, are you just using that term to justify inaction? Tune into this episode of The Art of Charm to learn what’s at the root of perfectionism, and why we use a myth to cover up our fear of failure. The Cheat Sheet: What is the definition of perfectionism and why is that a bad thing? How is procrastination the opposite of perfectionism? What happens when you wear perfectionism as a badge of honor? How do our smartphones and other technologies reward perfectionism? How doe...
Apr 18, 2018•56 min
Last week we learned all about AoC co-host Johnny Dzubak (@dzubak). This week, we’re turning the spotlight around to hear the life story of AJ. How did he go from science wiz to football player? And then from cancer biologist to Art of Charm co-founder? Tune in to this episode to hear the story behind your co-host’s unique trajectory. The Cheat Sheet: Who is AJ Harbinger? How did navigating difficult family dynamics shape AJ’s emotional fingerprint? What did facing rejection from girls teach AJ ...
Apr 13, 2018•1 hr 31 min
Johnny Dzubak (@dzubak) grew up in Greensburg, PA, honed his musical chops in Chapel Hill, NC, and now runs The Art of Charm in Los Angeles, CA with AJ. But how did he get from there to here? Listen while Johnny shares his story. The Cheat Sheet: Who is Johnny Dzubak? What is The Rust Belt Scowl? What did musical aspirations teach Johnny about social dynamics? How did Johnny and AJ meet and really become friends? Does Johnny consider himself an introvert or an extrovert? And so much more... Full...
Apr 03, 2018•1 hr 16 min
There's a fine line between pushy and pushover. In this toolbox episode, we learn 10 ways to maintain resolve and stay high value in personal and professional conflict situations. "Let us never negotiate out of fear. But let us never fear to negotiate." -John F. Kennedy The Cheat Sheet: Avoiding conflict only delays its resolution. High value conflict resolution seeks a win/win. Discover the three criteria for effective negotiation. Learn 10 ways to maintain high value in conflict resolution. Kn...
Mar 26, 2018•1 hr
