Hey, everyone, thanks for tuning in today. I have the opportunity to answer some questions that have been posed by our listeners and sent into patristic nectar. So here we go. Welcome to our Q and A. This question is about how to do violence against the passions? Give me your blessing, Father. I want to root out as much sin out of my heart and mind as possible on this side of the grave. But i''m sure as to how to accomplish this. How do I do violence against the old man and
tank the kingdom of heaven by force? Please please help me, and thank you very much. That's from David Austin. Great question, David, fantastic question. And this is what I would say. I want you to think with me about your spiritual acquisition with the image of the rabbit and the what is it, the rabbit and the hair, the tortoise and the hair. I want you to think with me about the relationship with the tortoise and the hair with regards to spiritus.
Many people, when they are inspired by a word from Jesus or they come to church and they see so much beauty, they want to gather it as quickly as possible. It's a very natural feeling. But you want your Christian life to be a matter of conviction, a matter of principle. When you feel like it, you run to the top of the mountain. And then when you don't feel like it, you don't do anything, and you end up just rolling back down to the place where you started. You actually
made no progress at all. The important thing is consistency. I would say start where you are. For instance, learn to keep a basic prayer discipline, what we call a canona or a prayer rule. Make the agreement with your father confessor, make your agreement with your pastor. Let him look at it and say, this has seem reasonable to you. And you want to make your prayer discipline something that
you can actually accomplish. It's something that you do on your best days, something that you do on your worst days, so that no matter what, you build the habit, the perpetual practice of praying. This is the way you want to start. You want to lay a good foundation. If you're going to build a big house, you have to have a solid floor. If you're going to be a big tree with a lot of fruits, you have to
have roots that are sunk into the ground. So start where you are, build a discipline that you'll never break. Tell yourself, I'm going to put prayer, my prayer rule in the same category I put other things in my life that are non negotiables, like eating something, brushing your teeth, putting on your clothes. That all takes time, and it all takes effort, but people don't think about it because for them it's non negotiable. Put your prayer rule in
that category. Put going to church on Sunday morning on time, and going to the great feasts in that category. Where you don't feel like you've done a great thing, like you're somehow some special Christian. No, you're just doing the basics. You're just doing what is it essential? And then once you have those basics, then you can make more progress. You can develop your alms tradition in your own life. Who are you going to serve? How can you use
your gifts to build people up? These are the steps if you take them, to draw near to God, to learn to pray, to learn to fast, to learn to give. These are the fundamental disciplines prayer, fasting, and alms giving that Jesus put right smack in the middle of the
sermon on the mountain for a reason. They're basic to be for any Christian to make progress, and if you practice them sustained practice over time, you're going to find yourself making tremendous progress and you'll have victory over your passions. This mother wants to know how to talk to her children who are fifteen and twelve about sex. It's a great question, dear Father Josiah. I am writing to you because I need your kind advice and support on two
aspects of my life. How I should speak to my boys fifteen and twelve about sexual life without scarring them or to put a mark on their heart like a prohibition, and how to discuss with them about chastity. And second is that I like I live with guilt that I no longer want to pro create, and I know that is against God's will. How can I ease my guilt? Thank you very much, and God help us well. I
ask my blessing on you, sweetheart. Thank you for sending these questions in and I'm so glad you're asking the question about how to properly teach your own children, who are definitely at an age where they need to hear from you about this. Fifteen and twelve about sex. I'm glad you're asking it because a lot of parents abandoned their duty to this because it's uncomfortable. Sometimes it's uncomfortable
because the parents are ignorant. Sometimes it's uncomfortable because the parents have not been good examples, and sometimes they just feel very nervous to raise the question. But this is one of the most important areas of parenting. So I'm glad you're thinking about this, and you most definitely should talk to your children about it. If you don't, I promise you your children will get their education from the secular society. And the secular society, forgive me, is clueless
about sexuality and the purpose of sexuality. Our secular culture and especially our secular schools, could not tell up from down when it comes to sexuality at all. In fact, they will teach your children to abandon their Christian faith. If there's one area that has hurt our Christian children more than anything in the secular schools, it's this. It's being exposed to the most grotesque forms of sexual perversion and being told that it's normal. This is calling good
evil and evil good. So to speak with your children, I would say the most important thing is for parents to model mature Christian sexuality in their own relationship with their spouse. So for your children to be able to see that you love one another, and that you appreciate one another, you respect one another, you hold one another, you kiss one another, that you're not ashamed of your bed,
which has God's blessing on it. We say in the wedding service, Jesus put his blessing upon marriage and the marriage bed. There is nothing shameful about the marriage bed. People can become shameful, but there is nothing shameful about marriage. In fact, Saint Paul says, let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled. This is Hebrews thirteen, Verses four and five very important
texts to share with your children. Sexuality is something intimate, so it's not something that you treat casually or bring your children into the intimacies of your own marital union with your spouse. But to talk to them about the glory of being one, about caring for one one another, and also having children, the glory of actually having them, for them to see that they mean more to you than any possessions you have in your life or any job. But they these children who are God's gifts to you.
This is very important for them. And then to talk with them about their their interest in the opposite sex, and to sit with them and ask them, what are you looking for in a partner? What would who would you like to marry? And what are the important qualities? And help them think about this and ask them what do you know about sexuality? And what do you think is the purpose of God giving you these desires? And how do you determine between a good desire and a
bad desire? All of these are natural questions that if you open a line of communication, you'll be able to have very fruitful discussions with your sons about this, and then they won't be surprised about what they see or the temptations that they're confronted with, and they'll know, through your good counsel, how to manage those temptations. And if they don't know, because you've opened the line of communication, they will come to you and ask you, and you
can also go to them and ask them. You don't have to be an expert suitor. God will help you make all of your concerns known to Him and concerning your question, dear about your sense of guilt because you don't want to have any more children. From one perspective, it's very understandable, because having a child is a great feat, and raising a child is a great feat and often an exhausting feet. Sometimes when we're thinking about the burdens involved,
we step away from an enthusiastic attitude. But I would say this anything anytime you find your heart, when we find our heart out of a chord with the scriptures, out of a chord with the mind of God, we should ask the Lord to alter our hearts and think of those beautiful psalms like someone twenty seven and someone twenty eight, or if you read the septuagen one twenty six and one twenty seven. Children are a gift of
the Lord. The fruit of the of the womb is a reward like arrows in the hand of a warrior. So are the children of one's youth. How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them. God's given you to beautiful children. That's nice, but all you have done is reproduced yourself. You actually haven't even done that.
Because the ab you have to have two point one children just to keep the population alive and the first words that ever I went into the human ear from God, whorre be fruitful and multiplied, filled the earth, rule it, and subdue it. Nothing's more glorious than a child who wants to go into battle with two arrows in your quiver if you could have three, or four or five. So even though you're a little scared, make your cross and be open to life. Watch what God will do
for you. This new question is about a man who finds himself having a hard time stopping his sins. Hey, Father Josiah, God bless you well. Thanks a lot, and God bless you. I felt compelled to send you a question after watching some of your great responses to difficult matters. A little backstory. I've been an atheist most of my life, even though I was baptized as an infant. Now I'm twenty two and I live in Norway, and i became a Christian about seven or eight months ago. Good for you,
Good for you, serve Christ. You will never regret it. And I'm currently going to Katechisis in the Catholic Church. I was deeply enveloped in sin of all kinds, drug addiction, full of hate and anger and very sexually immoral acts, both with others and myself. I'm sorry with you, Brother, God, bless your humility to tell me this. I praise God for pulling me out of this darkness I was in and calling me to repentance. I never wish to go back to a life without him. Sadly, I still struggle
a lot with pornography and masturbation. I have a tendency to start hating myself for desecrating the Temple of the Holy Spirit in this way. But I thank the Lord for pulling me out of my despair, Considering I'm not a fully converted Catholic yet, I can't go to confession, but I go to church. I read the Bible, I study the Catechisis. But I feel years of weight of the sins of neglecting God and my horrible sexual immorality. Especially weang on my heart. I want to cry, but
I just can't. I get angry and frustrated, and I start to doubt if I'm truly sorry. I get depressed because my heart feels empty. I'm terrified of having convinced myself of loving the Lord, lying to myself, and especially lying to the Lord about truly wishing repents, but my heart not truly being in it. All I want is from my love for the Lord to be genuine and wholehearted. Wow, what a thing to say. What a thing to say.
You're experiencing the horror. You're experiencing the horror of inner division. My dear brother, you find that in your heart you love God. But you also discover, in Saint Paul's words, that within you there's another law at work in your members, waging war against you, causing you to cry out, wretched man that I am, who will deliver me from this death.
That's the end of Romans seven. And then the next verse in Romans eight one says that there is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. This is the guidance that Paul provides for people. Don't be discouraged because the war is great. And whenever you see yourself feeling down on yourself or tempted to be angry, don't allow yourself to go there. You said a beautiful thing. You said, I want to cry, but I can't ask
God to give you tears. God hears the cry of the broken hearted, and he will give you tears, and those tears will put out the flames of lust in your life. Keep fighting until you're free. Don't give up until you have the victory. You're a young man, Saint Paul, I'm a saint John Rather. In his first epistle, he says, I write to you young men, because you're strong and you've overcome the evil one. Those words are for you.
You're young, You're strong. Fight until you're free. Engage in the battle until you win, and be satisfied with nothing less. Don't reconcile with any sin in your life, and instead of anger, cry be sad, because blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. God be with you. This next question is about a jaded lover who wonders what to do. I have recently met a very kind and
godly woman who expresses interest in me. However, due to multiple bad experiences of betrayal in the past, I have become jaded and fearful of romantically entangling myself ever again, what advice would you have for overcoming this maladaptive defense mechanism? Thank you for your time. Glory be to God in all things. This is from Samuel Grubbs Well my dear brother, I think I would first recommend that you watch a video that I posted some years ago called the twelve
Rules for Courtship. I think it's important for you to get your mind clear about how to court a woman. This will provide a new path for you such that you'll guard your heart and it won't be such a bloody experience. You should know that, no matter what, trying to fashion a relationship is always going to be a
sensitive matter. This is why the late and great Elder Emilianos, the abbot of siemon Opit from monastery on man Athos, used to give this counsel to people that even when you have a sense and it's clearly blessed for you to begin a relationship, put both of your hands on your heart and hold on. It's very important to do that. Protecting yourself with this protective mechanism of withdrawal won't help you at all, So just abandon it. Abandon that temptation
to withdraw. Withdrawing within yourself is no solution. It's better for you instead to put your whole focus on giving your heart to God, preparing yourself to be the man that a woman will need, the woman that God's chosen for you and put your faith in God. This next question is about the Book of Romans. Does the Book of Romans fit Lutheranism better than Orthodoxy? Hello, Patristic Nector. It has been truly a blessing in my life, and I appreciate what you all do. I have purchased a
copy of your book, Rock and Sand. I hope it's helpful to you, especially the two chapters on Lutheranism, and was very much edified by it. I grew up Baptist, but when I attended college for my undergraduate I was exposed to different Protestant denominations. Long story short, I have been questioning if the faith that I knew growing up is the true faith that Christ established. I currently am taking some seminary courses through my local church. While going
through Romans in our New Testament class. I can't help but think that our reading of Romans fits too conveniently with Luther and his Solas. This makes me wonder what would an Orthodox reading of Romans emphasize? Any pointers to ways that I can further research this. Please pray for me as I look into orthodoxy. This is from Dalton p Well, my dear brother. I do have examples that you should look into. The most important would be for
you to read Saint John Chrysostom's commentary on Romans. In my opinion, it is the best commentary in the history of the Church on that epistle, and I think you'll find there that the faith that he articulates is a faith that had been expressed from the time of the Apostles until the fourth century, and it's kept today. The problem with the solas is that they're made up. They're made up. This next question is about being offended. Thank you for your blessed work. I have a question regarding
the spiritual life. I'm struggling with taking offense. For example, if someone often unintentionally is rude or says or does something to me which I then take in the wrong way, I find myself inadvertently offended. I forgive these people and pray that God shows me humility because I know this is my own pride at play. Good discernment. Yet a sense of injury and slight remains. How can I concretely
combat these feelings? Thank you for your time. Many greetings from Germany in Christ Boniface are What a great name you have. Boniface thank you for your question too, and I'm glad that you already know half of the answer. You've already identified that your offense comes from pride. That should tell you most of what you need to know. If you're feeling offended, it's because you think you're somebody.
And if you were more focused upon your own sins and the offense that your daily life brings to God and to others, your energy could be directed on correcting yourself to be a blessing to everyone instead of expecting everyone to be a blessing to you, which is what they offended man expects. The person who's offended is walking around expecting to be treated. Well, where do we get that idea? As Christians? Then we pick up a cross. It may be you can't even be saved unless you
have a lot of offense in your life. Certainly, if everyone was nice to us, this would be the quickest road to hell possible. So change your mind, my dear brother, about offense. Trust the providence of God. Trust that he brings just the right amount of offense into your life every day so that you can cover it over with love. Because if you cover over others offenses, God will cover over yours. This next question is on female vanity and
only fans ooof Hello Father. I saw your video regarding the illness of vanity for men, and it helped me a lot. It would be a blessing if you made one about the specific struggles of vanity for women and how to overcome them. I agree with you on that. My physical appearance has been an idol of mind for years, and I'm tired of it interfering with my relationship with God. I really appreciate your videos. They have been a useful tool in my spiritual journey. Thank you and God bless
you Father. Well. Certainly, feminine vanity is a traditional female vice, something that is addressed by Saint Paul and Saint Peter in the New Testament, where both warn women from paying too much attention to their appearance and wearing fancy chains and jewels and cosmetics. Simplicity, beauty, these things are wonderful, but the idea of vanity, this is a great vice. So you're very wise, Dear Sea, You're very wise to run from this instead pursue simplicity and the beauty of
the inner person. This is Saint Peter's advice. The beauty of the heart is what all women should seek to cultivate. Of course, we should take care of ourselves and you should always want to not be offensive to anyone in any way, and to please your husband and etc. But be very very careful with vanity. Unfortunately, in our digital age, the exterior, especially for women, has become the dominant force. This is what's behind so much of the social media crazes.
Women even developing psychological conditions because they're constantly thinking about what other people are thinking about them, how they look, how they compare with other women, and what men think. It's very shallow. This is a very shallow way of interaction. So I would say, don't put a lot of pictures of yourself on the internet. Stay very far away from the immorality of and pornography of only fans. Those are
for women who don't fear God. And we want all of the women who are involved in this to walk away from it and return to a beautiful life of modesty, because if they carry themselves with modesty, then they can have the great gift of a husband who will appreciate their modesty. No man wants to marry a woman who displays her sexuality to everyone. She doesn't need a million husbands touching her with their eyes. She needs one man
who will embrace her with his whole heart. And you're never going to get it if you sell yourself cheap like that. Oklahoma Orthodoxy, I'm just getting into Orthodoxy. I live in Oklahoma and was wondering if there was a church here in the state that you could recommend that is true to our Father. This is from thy Well, certainly I can. My dear brother, there is a friend of mine. His name is Father John Salem, and he's the pastor of a fantastic church called Holy Prophet Elijah
Church in Oklahoma City. I would encourage you to contact Father John. Father John's sister used to be a parishioner here in my parish many moons ago. In fact, she was the babysitter for some of my oldest children, who are now grown and have their own families. She is now a nun, in fact, an abbess nun a Holy Assumption monastery in Calastoga, California. So that family that's called good stock, and I would recommend you go see Father John. How to pursue Orthodoxy when involved in ministry in a
non orthodox church. Oh This is a good question. I'm part of a Pentecostal church and I have been baptized for two and a half years now. I have no family that is Christian. I went through things that no kid should go through. Who I'm sorry, and it led to a dark path until I had a spiritual encounter with Jesus. He gave me that love that couldn't have been received anywhere else in this world until this day. And I've still never felt his presence like that before.
I just started studying church history for about two months now. Well, you better put your seatbelt on, my dear brother, if you started studying church history, you know, the church didn't start yesterday, and it didn't start in nineteen oh one. When the Pentecostal movement started. It started from our Lord in the early first century, and he said I will build my church and the gates of Hell will not
prevail against her. You want to make sure that you are in the church that Jesus built, not a contemporary creation. He continues, I've been struggling so much with confusion and doubt and even God. The Pentecostal church I'm at right now has been like a second family to me. I've come to have a personal relationship with many of these people, and I've served this church trying my best to honor God and serve God the way he did, the way that he wants us to. My pastor sees something in
me that I don't see in myself. He's offered to pay for me to go to Bible College because he wants me to become a minister. I've become a youth leader and now a teacher for the junior kids. How can I leave this behind? Not to mention, I also have a girlfriend who I've met here, and we've been together now for ten months, and we've developed such a close relationship with each other. How can I just throw it all the way? Wouldn't God want me to put
my desires on a leash instead of hurting others? Why is there such a tug on my heart for the Orthodox Church? Well, my dear brother, what you're talking about is truth. What you're talking about is Orthodoxy versus heresy. When you're talking about such important matters, this is not a matter of your personal desires. You never put the quest for truth on hold. Christ is the truth, and the Church, Saint Paul says, is the pillar and the
ground of the truth. If you're never going to compromise seeking the truth, that means you can never stop following Christ, nor can you stop serving his church, because the Church is the pillar in the ground of the truth, that if you find the Church, you find the truth sitting upon it. We're also warned in the scriptures and by Jesus himself many places to beware of false teaching, to hold to that tradition which was imparted to you and pass down from the Apostles until this day. That, my dear,
is what you have to hold on. So I would encourage you be humble, treat everyone who has invested in you with great love and respect, share your questions with them, and get to the bottom of it. Sir, you've already tasted some of holy Orthodoxy. Keep going, bring your girlfriend
with you. Patiently ask the important questions so that you can plant yourself not in something that's well intentioned but a human creation, but something that is made by Christ, built upon the Apostles, and has an indestructible reality, And that is the one Holy Catholic in Epistol, the Church. Well, dear ones, thanks so much for watching and participating in this Q and A, I really appreciate your questions, and I hope that something of what I've said has been
a little bit of help to you your prayers. Hey everyone, I hope you've downloaded the Patristic Nectar app on your phone. It is a treasure trove of soul nourishing content, and I hope you'll consider becoming a regular donor to Patristic Nectar today