The Power of Naming
There is an innocuous seeming thread which winds through the entire history of humankind telling of the power in naming things. European legends weave tales of dragons and other creatures who choose not to give out their real names to avoid magic being used against them. Mages and wizards are called by ambiguous names which could be personal to them, a pseudonym to hide their origins, or a title wreathing them in mystery. Elders of the East blur their origins in similar ways throughout time, sometimes to avoid power struggles and other times to focus on their teachings rather than their personal life. In various indigenous cultures it is not uncommon for a person to have multiple names, one which is something descriptive of their personality and can be used with outsiders, another their extended tribe or cultural group, and one which is private to them and connects with the deeper spiritual web.
While all this can seem mystical or something from a fantasy novel, a name in embodied life has real power. Just ask anyone who has had their identity stolen. Or any woman who has gone through a divorce and either worked to change her name or decided to "carry" his. Check with those who have ethnic names as they discover the power it has to prevent them from being hired, renting an apartment, or getting into college.
Names also have the ability to empower by allowing us to claim the truth of who we are. They can help us shed old perceptions of self, claim aspects of our true nature, and state boldly how we intend to step forward on our path.
It's important to note that souls don't have names. This is something I'm asked about as clients want to know what their true soul name is. Names are unique to embodied existence. When a soul communicates through thought and feeling, when an intimate conversation means interpenetrating each other, who you are IS your name. There is no other soul but you so there is no confusion in who you are or need to represent yourself in symbol form. Names are a means for souls who communicate in linear time via physical expression to indicate which individual they are referring to or who they are, separate from others who might seem similar.
Names and naming are a powerful and empowering part of embodied life. Names, no matter how simple or complex, are symbols which represent and define an individual. Constructed of vocalized sounds and drawn lines they encode a tremendous amount of information including: culture, geographic area of birth or parent's origin, community affiliation, gender, historical period of childhood, family of origin and possibly spiritual path. Even the most generic of names, Bob Smith, tells of North American heritage, probable male gender and middle/working class family background.
Naming something has the ability to give us dominion over it as described in the story of Adam. His being empowered by God to name things displays his status as more powerful than and caretaker of all the creatures God has made. It also sets up power dynamics when it comes to the creation of Eve. Is she his equal if he names her like the rest of creation? This power struggle is also seen in the Jewish mythology of Lilith who has become a complex symbol of empowerment, freedom, rebellion and defiance in her own right.
So, while names have power, in current Western culture they are often an ill or incomplete fit. Rarely does a given name include everything about a person or even what is most relevant about them since the name is created by and basically for someone else and then applied to an infant. They are somewhat like the tabs on a file folder or the name of a computer file. They indicate what may or should be inside, but we can't know for sure until we open them. Underneath the convenient and more than likely conventional name/symbol, universes await to be explored.
This is in part why naming ceremonies and rituals are an important part of most spiritualities, religions and cultures. Parents name their children in order to bequeath to them, or protect them from, the lineage of one or both of their families, to interconnect them with their tribe or community, to imbue them with a specific energy, or memorialize someone who has gone before them. Beyond this, in Western culture, marriage includes a naming ceremony where traditionally the woman changes her family name to that of her husband. Nowadays it's possible for both or neither party to change their last names or they can combine their last names adding themselves to the generation of hyphens.
What we call nicknames are often awarded to us because of something we've done, circumstances, like too many people in the group having the same name, or because our name is difficult to pronounce. Often nicknames come closer to being our true name than what is on our legal documents and so most never know we have a formal name until we have to sign something.
It is also possible to have a name given to us, once we are an adult, by a spiritual leader, a religious figure, or a community as a means of acknowledging our commitment to them, our spiritual path, and more.
Because most naming is something which happens to us, we can inadvertently be set up to struggle with our identity. People spend decades explaining that they go by their middle name, they prefer this nickname from the varieties associated with their legal name, or they prefer to be called something else altogether. Like with native communities, they may go by a variety of names throughout the years, but because Western culture sees names as a one-and-done thing, they feel conflicted or somehow less than for doing something others don't understand or feel annoyed by. And unfortunately, women who go through a divorce have this question of identity forced on them by the question of whether they go back to their maiden name (the identity of their parents) or they keep their married name (the identity of their ex) or pick something else at a time when everything is up in the air, and they might not know who they are or want to be.
But we don't need to just accept the names which have been given to us or which we have been left with. Names have power and being called by the symbol which truly represents you brings the external experience of you into harmony with the internal. It means every time someone speaks your name, writes it, texts it, or thinks it, they are imbuing you with energy and helping you manifest fully into the world. Each syllable of our true name manifests you into the world like the harmonious vibrating tones of a singing bowl.
It is possible to legally change your name and in most countries the process isn't overly arduous. Many people in spiritual community do this and, depending on your county/state/country, it is usually just a matter of a few forms and a couple of legal procedures. I personally did this for myself, legally changing both my first and last name years ago. The biggest complaint I hear from people about a name change is how many things you then have to notify about the change like credit cards, utilities and so on. However, all of these make the process relatively simple, and it can be done over a couple of days.
Legally changing your name means you can let go of continually correcting those who use the wrong one, explaining why you are called this or that, or being continually connected with someone or something which is not you. It is a freedom which releases the old, unfolds the new, and allows you to move forward on your path being supported rather than frustrated and thwarted.
When people ask me about how to reclaim their power, learn to feel self-confident, change their experience of the world from combative and dangerous to full of opportunities, this is one of the ways which comes to the forefront.
Naming
So how do you go about finding your true name? Well, first, recognize it's not something you lost. It's not car keys or a library book. Your name is like a piece of art which you are creating even as it helps to support and create you. Or you can think of it as a lotus, which is continually growing and unfolding petals. You are it, so it can be whatever is most supportive and nurturing for you.
To be honest, often people know what their name is already. It's the name they have used for years with their friends and coworkers. All it takes is going through the formality to have it legally changed in order for them to be relieved of struggle and feel their name support them like the most luscious of warm tropical waters.
For others this is an opportunity to claim their truth and power. Like choosing, after 3 marriages, to use their middle name as a last name. Or to work within spiritual community in ceremony to craft a last name which is not only in alignment with who they are now, but calls them to unfold further. Or to honor an aspect of themselves or their lineage which they want to embrace more fully like something from their mother's ancestral line.
Personally, I did a bit of both some years ago. Over time and after 20+ years of being a spiritual elder for my people and working in service, I came to know that I needed my last name to reflect who I am. So, I worked with my spirit guides and my community to craft a name which best fit the entirety of me and the life I had chosen.
In a completely other aspect of life, I’d struggled for years with my first name. For my entire life I have been called Teri by family and friends. It wasn't until I went to school for the first time that I found I had a different first name and Teri was just my nick name. Unfortunately, corporations want everything to be associated with the name you put on forms, which meant email addresses, name plates, name tags and so on with my legal name and energy expended either correcting people or just giving up and being called something which felt like a role in an off Broadway play.
So when I went to have my name legally changed I had them do first and last, so everything matched, and added no middle name as none was necessary. Hence my first name is now really Teri, and my last name is Uktena, the Cherokee being who taught the people how to be pipe carriers and so much more.
I am who I am.
The I AM
For those who struggle with external expression, with being able to connect their internal practice with external action, to find their voice or manifest themselves fully into the world, I recommend adding "I AM" to your practice, especially when working to craft or discover a name. I often combine toning "I AM" with OM. OM tends, for me, to be an expression of 3rd and 4th Chakra so less connected and more Universal while "I AM" is an expression of the combined 3rd and 2nd Chakras, of Universal self or soul connected with an intimate expression of identity in the world. In Biblical terms the "I AM" is a statement which God provides for us to understand our beingness in the world. It is expressed as a complete description encompassing all that God is. It is an action and at the same time a statement of being. It is the movement of self out of the static into the action of expression in the world.
As each of us is the Universe in microcosm or, in Biblical terms, as each of us is made in the image of God, then each of us is being and expressing in this way. To tone "I AM" is to actively participate in this statement of being. It encompasses all we intend, all we have already accomplished, all we are striving to be, and all we have not yet become. It does so without any need to set intention, focus the mind, or will things into being. As meditation is the movement inward to connect with ourselves so the toning of "I AM" is our self-moving outward into the world, coming out into the light where we're able to see and experience it clearly.
There are many ways to use the "I AM". Similar to chanting OM one note can be used and sustained through one long breath, then repeated. "I AM" can be something we say under our breath in quiet moments or as a means of dealing with difficult situations. (Not necessarily as satisfying as an expletive but more socially acceptable in the workplace.) It can be chanted without breaks over and over again until we feel saturated with the energy and complete or toned once into the world where we can then listen for the echo return to us. We can tone the "I AM" once and then attend to all which is being revealed to us in it or we can chant it several times to allow our bodies to accept it. Saturating our bodies with it helps us harmonize with this outward expression and coordinate our actions so they express it as well.
The "I AM" can be transformative in a great many ways as well as revelatory. I like to think of it as the sound a lotus makes when it is opening to reveal a Buddha or Tara. What will it reveal in you?