"Another Historic Sporting Weekend"

Life for the Export Beer Guns Studio and brought to you, as always by Export Ultra the Beer for Here. This is the Agenda Podcast for Tuesday, the twenty ninth of October.

The Agenda Podcast, the home of Sporting Nonsense and clap Trap, brought to you by Next Sport.

A vulture had a big good morning to g Lane morning. First time you slepped in your own bed last night in about a week. Yes, I felt like had been on the road for quite some time. But after a wee little escapades around Corimandel and they have plenty, I just went straight to the Rotorua region. We did the split parent drop off pick up. Yeah at the BP and Hamilton. No talking, no discussions between the two cars. You just dropped the son off.

I e. Me threw the bags out the back and you just left.

Yeah. And I gave a death stare. Yes to your wife and the thing. Send her a passagg message as you guys drove off that I knew would just drive her insane.

You did. And yeah, that's so, he says.

I think it was something like he hasn't got enough underwear. Yeah, something like what happens all the socks I bought him?

Last week. Yeah, that was Yeah, that really set her off.

They were quite expensive and you haven't chipped in for any of it.

By the way, school fee is a jet.

So all very well and good that you're going to go swaning off down to write a idio wherever you were, But there's really like parenting to be done here and you're not doing it.

Where did you go?

Yeah, you've been through a witty Yeah. We had a family reunion of sorts. It was my grandmother's would have been my grandmother's hundredth birthday. Oh ah, so we got together family of that, that side of the family and there it all got together.

It was good. It was good.

The weather was good on Sunday, you know, just knocked around, drank heaps of beers. Great and yeah, a few inappropriate uncles turned up, dropped a few bombshells on a few conversations.

M It wouldn't change much.

Wouldn't be a family reunion without a dodgy uncle.

Yeah.

The dodgy uncle, though, is the son of what we used to call Uncle Jerry the lip Kisser, who's no longer with us. And I heard, yeah, Uncle Jerry the lip Kisser used to come in for the lip kiss with all the girls, you know at Christmas time when you come in and and you only do it once apparently, and then after that you go in and you dummy to the right and make him forced to kiss you on the cheek. But we never used to tell any newcomers and just watch them get lip kissed by Uncle Jerry. Anyway,

Jesus Christ. No, I like that.

I like not telling people about about things like that. Like I. I think one of my cousins was bringing a parker partner around to our Cordals place for the first time, and they said, look, whatever you do, you've got to make sure you hung him as soon as.

You get in there.

And so this stir comes up the driveway, just go straight in for the who that kind of merry. The poor dog got stitched up. My friends did to one of their mates when I went over to stay with them and Dubui that's an Irish friend. They were like, Mania's coming to stay with us. It's a it's massively insensitive. If you don't hang him when you meet him, good and actually he's gonna love it if you hang him first. But the problem is they told me about it, and so I was like, I'm not doing that.

I don't want to. I don't want to be part of this.

And this guy walked into the room and just froze with horror when he saw me, because he was like, isn't two minds about committing to the Hongy or not? He was like, which one of these two is going to offend him doing it or not doing it? So, yeah, I love stitching people up at the Christmas Christmas would be a good time to do it.

Yeah, yeah, I like, I don't think I'll be seeing any of the protagonists was quite some time. It's quite good. Let's talk about the black Caps. Yeah, oh my god, I got my shirt on. Yeah, who would have Who would have bunked this man? Like I too now in

Of these two Test matches.

Yeah, I think India have massively underestimated the Black Caps and came in with an attitude of near Yeah.

I reckon.

Even after they lost their first Test, Yes, they were like, man, whatever will fucking thrash them in the next two.

Even coming out to bat in the second innings of the second Test, they were hitting sixers in the first over.

Yeah, they thought they were going to win.

I just I was pretty astounded by it, and like the level of arrogance is next level and do you know what? And I love just winding up the Indian cricket fans because they're getting absolutely teed off on the online because they can't come in with anything anymore. No, they come in with something else. They come around as something that will current World Test champions whatever.

But when we won it, they said it doesn't count because they went in the final.

I know they were in the finals right now because it didn't count for some reason because Australia got dock points for a slow over rate anyway.

So at an absolute purple.

Patch for New Zealand cricket, it's ridiculous.

I mean New Zealand sport in general. And we'll get to the rest of that stuff as well.

But this, that first one, you could have potentially said a fluke maybe because of that first inning's forty six.

Yeah, such an anomaly, and the patch was juicy is under cover for a few days.

It was weird. Yeah. The second one, what are they going to say about that turning?

After forty five minutes it was turning, Yes, not just turning, it was turning sharply after forty five minutes of day one.

Yeah, and they had five spinners.

I just loved the fat and I mentioned it last week and we could go back out of the tapes. My hope to all hopes, was that they'd produce a dust bowl and it would backfire and it fucking died.

That's exactly what happened. That suck on that.

Oh, while we're going back in time, I would like to assure an apology. For the longest time now, I've been saying, Mitch Sentner, great bowlert I love, one of our best. Is not a spin bowllet because it doesn't turn turns out he just needed the right pitch. Yeah, and I think I mentioned that he would be also.

I think we should go back to the tapes as well, that he's the tallest of all the spinners. He potentially varies his pace the most out of all of them, oh wildly. And that's what matters over there. That's what Ravi Ashman does. So and there's that massive hot take for me in Smith. He wrote online saying he's not a Test cricket, he offers nothing, he's not a threat and Test cricket and then he gets sends around against fourteen wickets.

Yeah, it was ridiculous. I've got some stats if you like to board to tears. Eighteen That is a number of consecutive Test series wins for India at home before the suck It. No other team had won more than ten consecutive successive Test series at home. India's previous series defense came against a defeat rather came against England in twenty twelve.

One.

That is New Zealand's Test series win is their first on Indian soil. Before the series, New Zealand had only won two Tests all up in India and Nagpur in nineteen sixty nine and wang Edy in nineteen eighty eight. Three is the number of New Zealand players with six or more wicket hauls in each innings of a Test match, which obviously Satana did, Richard Hadley and Dan Vittori being

So this's and you know what they're going to get. They get to go into the third Test with no pressure. Yeah, and this is I think. I know, look now I'm just jumping on the black Caps winning bandwagon, but I think without any pressure on their shoulders, they can go into this free wheeling.

India have got pride to play for.

They have to win this Test or they're going to have to seriously start getting a personal trainer and work in these fatties.

A little bit that is potentially I think if you. I don't know if they weigh cricket players, but they would be the highest BMI collective BMI.

I wouldn't want to play rugby against them, that's for sure. Maybe.

Now the only other team that would be threatening would be Australia because that has got tall timber. Yeah, and they're quite muscular. Wouldn't stowiness coming off a short ball at you?

Yeah, Wendy's if they got old of it? Yeah, that's true. If you wouldn't want Rakeem Cornwall coming out Jesus.

No, although I reckon here's probably the only cricketer I could step.

No.

Yeah, but we were talking about this on the Jerry and Friends show this morning, which was jam packed with friends this morning.

He got he got more friends.

Yeah, there's me in there. Taylor Curtis from Krug as well. She was in there as well, and Mash and Ruder, so the full compliment.

Jeez. But there's some old friends in there though. Yeah, there's no new friends, isn't it, well Taylor Taylor, Yeah, Taylor's new friends. I forgot. I was going to say.

We were talking about oh do you what way do you think the black Caps go into this next game, do they go, fuck it, We've already won the series, chuck it in neutral, or or do they go, let's put the foots of the throat three nil whitewash.

I think it's somewhere in between, somewhere in between where that there there's absolutely no pressure on them to win or lose what They can go into this game with so much confidence and freedom that the Indians do not have.

They are up against it.

Their media is laying into them, fans are probably going to start to lay into them.

Yeah, so they'll be burning effages.

Yeah, they will be. And that's as ideal form using. They can't come in free wheeling. It's a little bit of both. I mean they I don't think I'll take the foot off the throat, No, but they can quite happily take.

A few risks yep, because it doesn't matter.

No.

And I was saying, I don't know how many dudes we took over there. Would we have taken thirteen? Fourteen?

Yeah?

Yeah, I think fifteen in the squad fifteen play those four it didn't get a run.

I reckon the biggest Liam Lawson middle finger to India and just be like, you know what, we don't think you guys have got it.

I was talking about it, but he was touchshed touch last night and we're talking about it, and we'll say what's the most insulting thing we can do, and that would be bowl everyone and reverse the order. So everyone gets a bowl, everyone gets to wicket keep. Maybe we do the where you circle around and you change the gears, leave the gloves there, you leave the gloves there, everyone moves around a position in bowls betting, reverse the order, just total chaos.

Opening the betting is Punisher O'Rourke and Tim and Tim Southy Ages probably go for fifty and then opening the bowling. Please welcome Tom Latham and he'll be worket keeping to himself.

Yeah, thanks very much. So it'll be very interesting to see how that pans out.

Kicks off Friday at Whan Kitty And obviously we've got a pretty good record at When Kitty our first ever test.

When was there yep a tent for was it when Kitty?

When Kety is the spiritual home of New Zealand's overseas cricket exploits.

Yeah.

Well, and even though we got thrash by an innings, I think in that test and with AG's got ten, it's going to be great to watch because it just shows they I mean, when it comes down to it, they'll just they will say, now this will be their excuse. The Indian cricket team. Their focus is on the Australian series coming up. That is the true test. That'll be it.

That'll be it. Because I know you're right.

They will say, Yeah, we're worried about the World Test Championship because I think we basically need to go undefeated for the remainder of this period.

Yes, we do.

To make the final, I think we're out after losing those two in Sri Lanka. To be honest, I think we needed to win a majority of these tests.

So the advantage for us though, and this is where it's backfired on India to a degree or it could is it because it's one percentage and they play way more than anyone else. So if we go on a little bit of a winning streak, our percentage shoots up way more than theirs does.

Yeah, if we beat.

England three to zero in November December, I think we're there. I think maybe in the conversation, yeah, I mean, if you probably want to hit better analysis. I tune into the BYC podcast with Cleaver and Ford. Not so much for but Clever and Ford will definitely give you probably a better insight in what needs to be done.

Yeah.

One thing we can to lean into her offer a bit of insight into is how hard.

Do you think they hit their perse after that? One hard? Hard?

And you could and you know what, God bless them. Obviously his social media band was put in place.

I haven't seen anything. Yeah, correct, And they wouldn't have been able to leave the hotel.

Right, not really. I don't think there's no point in doing that. There's no like clubs go to.

Usually the hotels have quite good bars because you get swamped.

Yeah, they usually they party in the not party, but celebrate in the changing the room for quite a long period of time and then move back to the hotel. Unlike the Wunkton lines, social media let up with celebrations which I thought were pretty epic.

Let's take a quick break and we'll come back and talk about that NBC final over the weekend was the Curse Broken.

We'll be right back.

Well, it took overtime to decide the National Provincial Championship winner and Subsequently, the Agenda podcast curse has been ended.

It's been lifted. Brads.

We gave him the motivation that he needed to win the NPC and you could say it was evident every run he took he was massive. He was giving the boys another dressing down in the second half. The game went to overtime, which there were bodies all over the floor and overtime the just dudes just guessed weren't expecting it. Officially the podcast now can without guilt request players to come on the podcast who have sporting fixtures that weekend.

Yeah, that's good.

And also can I just say congratulations to our audience or whoever it was that gave us the hot oil on Hacker Elliott. We may have been the first media outlet to break the news or the rumor Hacker Elliott had been moved into the line squad.

And he ended up playing a good chunk of the game.

Yeah, what a while week it was for Hicky Elliott. So to rewind the clock, he wasn't even in the McKenzie team to start the club rugby season. Yeah, he just moved to the region. Then he plays a few games in the South Canterbury competition for McKenzie. He gets called into the Heartland squad at the end of that and so now he's playing for South Canterbury. All of a sudden he gets thrust into the first loss in

Yeah, well, you know, I think I'm surely he'd big few Dank Coles because that's the reason he was there, because Dank Coles gave it the big nah nah.

I did try and get heck Elliott on the show, and I will persist with trying to get him on throughout the week, but obviously the media manager was like, I don't even have his number. I don't know how to get hold of him. He showed up on Tuesday. But Brad Shields, when we had him on the podcast last Wednesday, we said, have you seen him around?

Well?

Heck Elliott was interviewed after the game and he said that he was there on I think Tuesday. So Brad Shields had seen him at that point.

Yeah, right, well he didn't, he said, I can't confirm all tonight, that's right.

So but.

Great, what a what a final? I had money on plenty. Unfortunately I went with my heart not my head on that front. But cracking game gets so tight, so tight, two great teams.

Over time. There was a missed penalty that could have won it.

Yeah, there was all sorts and Dupless his celebrations with the NPC trophy as he got it from the stage and he ran it up to the group and he thrust it so hard the lid popped off and that didn't look overly light, and I thought it was going to take someone out. It flew off like a silver frisbee. Yah, they sliced someone open. That would have been even better. But it was absolutely fucking persing with rain. Yeah, by the end, but the celebrations were next level.

It's great to see, actually, I think it was.

It was almost more euphoric than anything I've seen in super Rugby.

Oh, definitely those guys.

They went hard back to the changing rooms. There was some more great videos of them just dancing in the changing rooms. Hopefully the Bay Plenty boys went and joined them eventually, but I'm sure they did.

I'd say they would have.

They were talking about they didn't want to organize like their own pass up for afterwards. They were a little bit worried about getting a hit of themselves and blah blah blah. But then I've bred sheelds with sounds like if you win the bloody MPC, you go down the waterfront there in Wellington, who's going to not let you in career? You know they'll be clamoring over themselves to

Yeah.

Yeah, it was a bit of a scary start, wasn't it that they the Japanese scored first, and they scored another quick try and then it was tip for tet.

Yeah. And I remember I was at.

The family re union and there was you know a lot of farmers in my family, and they was standing around like ad the bagger mate, or is gone mate?

Or is gone?

I was like they'll put fifty on them, like yeah, like you just wait, this is and then sure enough they and they all started putting money on Japan and then as yeah, as per they kind of went out to a unassailable lead. Yeah, yeah, it was. It was a scary start though. Yeah, they conceded. The All Blacks conceded first, and I think there was another try that was called back their lock. Yes, it was like a

I don't think it would have. Like that was a freak try.

Yeah, but yeah, I mean you watched that game, and even though the start of it was tense, you couldn't have pushed that back a week or said no to whatever paycheck they offered you and let those boys play in the NPC final.

Yeah, you know, I don't know.

I quite like the start of the MPC though that four o'clock kickoff was perfect. Yeah, I enjoyed that afternoon kind of buzz at that game. But I don't think that's gonna mean anything for this weekend's test against England.

No, there's nothing.

Yeah, a lot of those players aren't going to be in the squad or starting fifteen. D mack leat me down a little bit, mainly because I had a lot riding on him in terms of my straightway and or a couple of my malties.

Because I followed journal. I sucked.

I got sucked into your you know, minno Smasher Mino bit. But he just didn't have the greatest of games unfortunately, while also playing it first five as well. Yeah, more from like fullback that he slices those teams up. Yeah, okay, I could have told me that last week. Well look I followed it in myself as well. So but we did smash them in US. Yeah, I'm with you as well. I don't what can you read into that? Bugger all? Yeah, and England great trip to Japan. I think we'll beat

Ye, one hundred percent.

You've got to have They've got to acknowledge Johnny Sixton in some way beforehand. Yeah, I walk them out onto the perch. He could bring the tea out do the coin toss. That'd be good. Yeah, and we should we should give ricco you only the captain's armband for the weekend so we can go out and do the coin toss.

That'd be powerful.

The other sporting news across the weekend, the key he's got blown off the park. In the second half of that game, it was tough. I was in on the three way. That was my leg was that we were going to beat beat the Aussies. I just felt like it meant a bit more to us. And when we talked to Carl on Friday from the TV, he said his worry was around the centers and could we defend in the centers against like every superstar fallback from the NRL which makes up the Australian back line, and we couldn't.

Yeah. I thought it was going to go away.

When I saw the weather forecast, it just about snowed on the captains and that's what I thought. Part of me was like you fucky was then Goes will be hating this, that's right, And then I was like half our team and dingus.

Yeah that was a good thing. I used to the cold either.

It's not like it's a thirteen West Coasters against thirteen Gold.

Coasters, you know what I mean. It was I cut a backfight on win.

No, that's not that's not gonna work. Yeah, that was a shame. But they'll make the final when the Keys will be a key ASI final again.

We've got our second game this weekend at Mount Smart Stadium against mat Martonga. So if you're looking to drive anywhere on Saturday, do it in the morning because the motorways will be closed from Saturday afternoon if you haven't. I mean, I know people have seen the social media stuff, but to live in the city when the top than league fans, oh my god, it up and about. It brings the city to its knees.

And it doesn't help.

They drive with their tongue and flag over their windscreen and they're just the cars are weaving all over the road, massive convoys. There's some weird engineering on top of vans where they kind of engineer their van to take at a minimum twenty eight flags.

Yeah on the roof rack.

Very flag based, yes, very flag based, but great so passionate.

Yeah, and just good to see people doing something. You know, you'd never see QVY League fans doing that. So yeah, they watch out. And if you are in the business of selling flags, God looks you, and enjoy the fruits of your labors. This weekend, Liam Lawson, he flipped the bird at old Sergia Peierz as he overtook them. I fucking love this, say old chick.

All which who's and if you don't know motor games, the rumor is that he is up against because next that's he's saying it Old Checko Pieris is underperforming, and he is. He's got exactly the same car as a strap on, but he's remarkably worse and performance.

And there in the same team, right him and verse seven.

Yeah, So the argument is that the kind of what's it called the Racing Balls, which is the one with Liam Lawson in it and Snoda, one of those two will potentially or someone else random might go in for the seat of Peri's next year.

So potentially it's Liam Lawson versus Pirie's for the seat in the Red Bull team now correct.

Hence they had a bit of a two do on the course and as he overtook him on fresh tires, he get flicked in the bird obviously a little bit attention. I love the fact that Liam Lawson has come in giving no fucks. He's a week before he's pissed off Fernando Alonso almost of the comata of the pit lane and just said fuck you mate whatever, and he's given the bird to his biggest rifle in Sergio Pierri's, who's won quite a few Formula ones, Yeah, races, he's one none.

I love it.

He's come in with just that fucking attitude. How good must that feel?

Ah, Because if you ever get stuck behind a slow dry and then you drive past and the instinct just to give.

Them the fucking bood, it's quite difficult to do in that little cockpit as well. Did you notice to reach across him side to reach across and just kind of do a side on like fuck you.

Yeah it was. I don't know.

I'm pretty sure Peters wouldn't have seen it, because you're going that fast and someone's doing a chubby little chowed finger out the window, but then the camera behind him picked it up and it's all over social media. Get on you, Liam Lawson, you got it. I mean, you can't be a nice guy and that kind of shit. It's fucking ruthless. Yeah, now he was. He came out and apologized afterwards. Lim Lawson did, yeah, hid sorry, it's not on my HS.

Know who I am.

I let myself down. Blah blah blah blah blah. I feel like he was forced to. Should he have apologized?

I don't know, he's probably just gone back now lo heat of the moment stuff.

I think once you've done that, you've had a run in with old Alonso, Then the next week you're pulling the fingers at someone. I think you've just got to go full wwe heel and just go fuck everyone. You'll pull the fingers at the next dude that I overtake as well.

I don't think you want to be the most hated on the grid, though, because the there's a lot of shit that goes on during qualifying and practice that can hinder you, know, if everyone hates you. I think there was an old English driver who was such a fucking liability and he crash into everyone.

Everyone hated him. I can't remember his name, but he.

Just got forced out because people would just slam him down on his laps and everything, because yeah, so you don't want to be a massive funk what I think, But I don't think him fighting with Alonso would would have Everyone thinks Alonzo's a grumpy, old fucking boomer anyway.

And also having a bit of a back and forth and pit lane after a race, that's part of the course, isn't it.

Totally?

And also technically this they you know, old mate came out, Horner came out and said, look, we're separate teams. I'm not going to comment on that team. They're in the same team, they're pretty much the same franchise.

Yes, But why I find that interesting is that he said that is because he doesn't want to like publicly reprimand Liam Lawson because he knows he might have to promote him next year, you know, or like there could be something going on there. So he can't come out and say, yeah, he was wrong for that, blah blah blah, because what if he turns out to be the fastest driver of all time, So there's a bit of bit of something there, and I'm talking about fucking motor games.

So no, look at that. Who would have thought?

In the end, Lawson he got his fucking front nose cut off by Calapinhor, another up and coming driver for Williams. And so he was around the twelfth mark. He was never getting the points, but he got his nose swiped off in that coming sixteenth. Yeah, but it's got New Zealand is interested in Formula one. Like you're saying, you're talking about motor games. Yeah, who would have fucking thought? I know exactly.

I love it. I love them.

Also apologized my uncle Roger. I introduced them to the tab maybe be the in of him. He got his bonus bit for depositing money and he said, I'm loving the Formula one and I said, there's some juicy odds on Liam Lawson being top six. He came ninth last time, so he piled all his bonus cash on there, and then he absolutely boiled me up when he came sixteen.

He was like, god it yeah yeah yeah, yeah, so sorry Uncle Roger.

Yeah yeah, we're responsible, Yeah, responsibly, you know, don't don't on need to take over your life, don't.

Follow lane steps.

Silver Ferns also won the Constellation Cup for just the third time after beating Australia sixty one forty three in the third test of the series over there in Perth. It is also the first time since two thousand and six that the Silver Ferns have beaten the Diamonds three games in a row.

Suck it.

What is up with New Zealand coming into competitions sucking and then overperforming because they came into this having lost to the England Roses quite not convincingly, but they lost both test matches. The White Fans coming into a World Cup ten zero, the black Caps coming into India two zero in Sri Lanka and just carving up it's just you know what it.

Is, it's ticket because they're not changing these teams. These are the same girls that played in the last series. The black Caps are the same team that played against Sri Lanka. The White Ferns didn't make any changes and everyone was slagging them off and not making any changes. They're like, no, no, no, I reckon, we can do this. We just got to fucking give it heaps and we'll win. And that's what's been happening.

Good on them.

It's good on for ticket. You can't coach ticket. Coach cannot coach ticket. And the silver ferns have it. Thresh of the diamonds, I mean, give them a taste. This has been back to back incredible weekends for sports.

Scratched the keys threshold. Next week Auckland f C as well by the way and the Phoenix.

So the Phoenix win, Auckland f C win, The top of the A League table was now AUCKLANDFC.

Then the Phoenix.

Yeah, and there's a derby this weekend in Wellington. Oh yeah, that's gonna be this is gonna be good. And then did you see what they did? The Wellington Phoenix flew the little cessna over I did.

Yeah. I messaged someone within auclandf C.

I was like, you're gonna put up with this ship and their response was we've got more than a fucking cesna. So I was like, oh, I flew a little cessna over the head of sign saying New Zealand bleeds yellow.

New Zealand is yellow. Oh yeah, New Zealand is yellow. Idea ten out of ten execution probably about a six or seven.

Yes, I think I could have come up with a better slogan the Yeah, she'd have just said something like Sea and Wellington, well you know see you next week.

Yeah, good luck, something like that, something ominous. Yeah, Or they could have like carpet bombed Mount Smart Stadium with Phoenix jerseys or like yeah, yellow and black dye just because yeah, sort of a flyover, or sent one hundred Phoenix fans to the ground and Phoenix kit like you know, yeah, I don't know there was. It was a good idea, but the execution when you read it, you're like, well, New Zealand is yellow?

What is it?

When has it been?

First of all, New Zealand is black, and second of all it's green, and that it is yellow for it in So yeah, I don't know about that.

I feel like, do you think that was a an Auckland Wellington Phoenix fan and went out to win out to Ardmore and goes just can you do this because it's only about it's only about seven hundred bucks to do that? Was it actually to fly that banner? Why are we doing it?

Well? Cap brittin out here, she's obsessed with it.

She feiled around for the mett and g he's They took a billboard down South as well.

For some reason, there was a banner attached to that.

Yeah.

Anyway, so it's not that's pretty cost effective.

We should be doing that every cricket games. The Agenda podcast text Agenda to three.

Oh you should just have listen live now the SEC text a C C to three two three six, because.

You know the cameraman's going to zone in on it.

No that the thing is to that extent they will, but the director will be in the track going absolutely not absolutely.

Not doing that one.

Nope, Nope, we should do it in Australia because they won't know what that is. And then smith they'll be like, Smithie, what's that all about? That's just some bloody it is.

He still has to explain the captain's hats, and he tried to explain the Beay shirts.

There's a little bit and he's like.

They call themselves the Beige Brigade. He wouldn't give them anything.

He hates it.

But he also if you watch any video that he puts up when he does his radio show, there's one on counter behind it. Okay, so city of the ship Head or it might be an off brand captain's hat, but it's an homage. All right, if you haven't heard already, Auto Trader want you to tell New Zealand about your car. And here at the Alternative Commentary Collective, we are dangerously close to taking the lead. Here we're getting ready to sell our ninety eight falcon Ute on auto Trader.

Everywhere we go, people are asking us how do we buy this thing? We want to, we want to bloody. You know the guy we got it off once it back, He did his sons for a dollar and then he asked us he can I get it back?

Yes you can. Here's your opportunity. Hit up Auto Trader and November. So I think it's next week, Friday, November, the first ye this thing goes live. This is going to be an auction, so you can chuck your bit in there. There are thousands of dollars worth of god he is. Keep your eye on social media. We'll let you know what that stuff as a lot of people have donated stuff for us to give away with us

Yep. And there may be a ninety eight Falcon you parked in the driver and just.

To clarify, you cannot this is not text deductible. The money we make from it we then gift to charity. It's not the no purchase off. So just so you know, so just thinking of there's some corporate out there he goes, oh bike, and we'll write it off as legally deductible. Legally not a donation. Yeah, no, it's you're buying a cart. Then the money comes to us, and then we do we make ourselves look good. But don't correct. Morally you've donated to charity. Morally you've won.

Don't get yourself into trouble with the idea and then come crying to us. Correct, that's what I was getting to.

We'll take the back.

Yeah, all right, let's take one last quick break and we'll come back with yours please.

Yours please, brought to you by Leader Home of.

I actually think we've got quite a few today.

Oh, we didn't take them last week to be on the road. No, we didn't know how many were talking in them. Five six, seven, seven. Let's see how fast through there we get, all right, first call of yours.

Please just listen to the body.

Thinking about what the guys is the other day about you guys aren't doing any commentary for the cricket and then too expensive. I think if you guys could go on holiday, I think you got enough money are sponsorships that you could surely commentate.

You know, we need you fellas there, we missed you.

Please go back, let's know your fault.

Yeah, it's it's like if you want to want to pick behind the curtain. It's actually a right issue. And we can't do the overseas games. It's not that we can't afford it. No, well we could afford it, but it would be very expensive to do the overseas games. We don't have the right any game that's played in New Zealand. We have the right rugby and cricket. We

It's out of our hands.

And in our defense last week were we in the Coromandel for three days of glorious sunshine year we were did we tuck into a few export oct as while we were there?

Saw us?

We were there for work, you know, all right, that wasn't a holiday. J Lane lost a pair of Hodies on that trip.

I did.

I lost a pair of Hondies on that trip. Yeah, rop, that was work. So if we enjoy our work, so bit, do you know what I mean?

Another call here? You're suppose.

Yeah, And I'm just watching acc does go or two halves, just wondering maybe charades whoever's doing it should be wearing a ball gag. Just just an idea because there's so much talking it's not really charades anymore.

Fox South Canterbury, thank you. Uh that is a great idea, that the talking is getting out of hand in churades. Yeah, I think it was.

The President was started by man. He was potentially one of the worst charade performers on earth.

Which ironically makes him one of the greatest to watch.

Yes, I know, but he just at the end of it would just like be going rack right big, like throw a clue at them.

And it's not what fucking charades is.

It's not at all. And you know, I blame I blame Laura McGoldrick. She's not she's not enforcing she's not enforcing it hard enough.

She's in the pocket of big charade. Yeah, they're obviously trying to get it out there, and I just can't have it shut down.

I guess she calls it charades, and maybe in charades you're allowed to talk. But she's the only person I know who's ever called it charades. And she said, oh, I got it from my my grandmother, who's from Tomorrow. I was like, I spent most of my life in Tomorrow, woman. I've never heard anyone say charades before.

You know.

Anyway, Yeah, I agree with you. I'll try and find a ball gack and tune in on you go.

I was really hoping you wouldn't turn on Thursday at thirty BM Sky Sport and Sky Open and see if we found the ball gag or not.

Another call here your space.

Okay, boys, just had a thought on the export ultra promos. You guys do the export ulture of the beerfer here. It's great, but it's a bit tired. My thoughts was changing that slogan, maybe going for export ulture the beerfer.

I don't know, what do you think?

Fox up Canterbury.

Well maybe maybe we can run that competition. We can come up with a bit of slogan uh and record it for us. Heb export Ultra the beerfer.

I mean, there's no reason you can't just start doing that, you know what I mean, No one's stopping you.

I like it.

Order every one of your export ultures that way. Yeah, so yeah, you don't know.

I like it.

You might have to run that camp over summer. Another caller here your sports, Hey bouls.

Just watching the cricket on Friday night and the.

Commentary is killing me. Ye, can't you do these overseas? Come on? How can it be lazy?

Mother?

Anyway, I'll let you go.

Shit, he was pleased with a little bit of abuse, wasn't itzy mother?

He was laughing because he knew would play it.

That's true. It looks like I just refer to the first talk back. Yeah, sorry about that.

Yeah.

Another call here, presumably about cricketing rights again, yours please.

Said his little help. I got a fight for fuck you g lane. I said he was out any the bowl of it anyway, whatever? What did you?

What was he?

I don't think I said anything. I said that center is probably the biggest threat. He's won that bowls of the most paced, he's got the most height. That's why he's getting all the wickets. I don't know, Matt, I didn't, I just any in general, but on our thread, Matt Heath has just come said, we should be a nickname change for Santa's Little Helper. Upgrade him to Santa Claus, Santa Claus, Sant ni Claus.

Yeah he's not. He's not Santa's Little Helper anymore. He's not Satin's little Helper. He is. He is Santa Claus. I'm all in Sant n Claus. He's evolving. Yeah, it's a bit.

It's a bit like the Stud, which was little Ambnitian. Some say he looks like an ol packer. Yeah, and then a male OL packer is called a study.

Yeah.

So he evolved from the little Amniian some say he looks like an ol packer into that one performance I think it was in the Mount. He renamed him the Stud, but he thought it was a stirred so.

No, no, no, it's a male maleacker. Yeah, shut myself, wristling stud. Once I told that story. An ol packer that way? Sure? Another calling yours.

Please, about the buns on Tom Latham.

Oh yeah, they tell he got some fucking runs. What have you doing?

Gulane?

Keep it? I'm calling it now. Black Caps three India donut nice? Yes, I donut. It's Hellok. The momentum as were the black Caps. They're full of confidence and Indian art. So who knows.

I mean that would be outstanding it. But if it ends up being two one, I don't care. If it ends up being three nil, we need to take their tests privileges away from them.

Yeah, tear two nation.

They should, Yeah, they should come off the negotiating table at the ICC and wish they should put something a massive on the line for something like that. Yeah, we get an IPL team. Would you be happy to put Kane Williams? Yeah, that's a great idea.

Actually, would you be happy to put Kane Williamson's life on the line if we got to execute coldly.

The way he's betting at the moment, they probably take that one last call of yours.

I just realized the black Caps were done something that Alexander the It could do. They're just conquering down anyway. I'll let you go, all right. You know how to fuck Actually you know, just fuck everyone in Canterbury, from Tomuruda, ash Burton to cross Church. That Himna Springs screw everyone up there, arrogant pricks.

South.

Yeah, soon as you started rolling the yards there and then he went up there. So yes, good old South got a little bit of history. Buff though there was Alexander the Great. Oh yeah, he couldn't conquer into you.

When they when they coming at him with rhinos and elephants.

Yeah, I'd ship my pants if that was happening to me. God, yeah, I mean, what actually could an elephant do to you in a war? Nothing, because you could stay away from it. Hugely intimidating if you've never seen one. But imagine never seeing an elephant, and then all of a sudden, some massive giant cow with a long nose and ears comes at.

You, or rhino and apparently they used to like dress them up in armor, just slap them on the ass and run them off into battle. And that it's an invincible pig with a sword on the end of its nose. What are you gonna do about that? That would scare the purse out of it. It doesn't scare the black cats.

An invincible peg, isn't it?

There to be.

You like running away from the front line and coming back to the headquarters where the funk's up.

Mini huge peg, giant the pig sword on it and a cow and a huge nose and big ears fangs. It's got fangs and an arm for a nose. I've never seen anything like it. It's fucking three buildings high.

Someone shoot someone, shoot corporatem an eye private shirt.

He's gone crazy. Shove shocks. If you ever get the chance, pat a rhinoceros behind the ear or in the armpit. Very very soft, very soft.

Okay, take that information with you into your Tuesday afternoon, Have a productive one, and we'll see you tomorrow for another edition of the Gender Podcast.

You have been listening to the HCCS Gender Podcast, brought to you by Export Ultra. For more episodes, I can follow on iHeartRadio or if you get your podcasts