October Surprise w/ Kirk Acevedo

Of the law and Order franchises. SVU is considered especially watchable.

We are the amateur detectives who kind of investigate the vicious felonies.

These episodes are based on. These are our stories.

Done done, Hello and welcome to That's Messed Up n SVU podcast.

My name is Kara and I.

Am Liza Traeger. We talk SVU, true crimes, celeb guests. This podcast really does have everything. And to add on to it, I now have fake nails, and boy does it change you.

She has entered another world. Yeah, it's like a different life.

I mean you notice I talk more with my hands, right, Like I constantly want people to see the nails.

Now they're like a yeah, and now they're like a centerpiece. You're like a gesticulating queen.

Now.

I was talking to Rosie about it because she saw Lisa's nails and she, for some reason is such a little like tomboy about like love's long nails and was like, oh my gosh, Lisa's nails. And I was like, yeah, I was like, Rosie, I can never get those, just so you know, like don't get like I not maybe when they're fifteen, but I mean not now.

But you can get a little glitter dip. You know, they don't have to be young. You can get yellers.

I know I'm gonna get something fun. I'm got to get got to get my nails done soon because she gotten her nails done or no, no, but I've done them for her. But like she wants to come with me to the salon. She's into that. That's really cool.

So we're gonna go. We're gonna go maybe this summer. She's a pampered queen.

Yeah yeah, so really quickly, I'm gonna want to get We're getting our nails done. We're getting all this stuff done because we are on the road. We want to look good for you guys when we see you in person. We have just as of this recording gotten back from Denver. Thank you everybody that came out in Denver, Tempe, San Francisco. But we will be in La at a new venue on Thursday, the twenty ninth. That's in two days. You still have time to get tickets. This venue is called

I'm trying to do things day at a time and then everything is a surprise.

So that's how I feel.

But get tickets at that's messed uplive dot com or the link in our instagram bio has all of our dates and yeah, like.

Stand because yeah we got new March. Oh my gosh.

If you haven't seen on our instagram, if you're one of our listeners that doesn't follow our instagram, why I don't understand. We just have beautiful content about our episodes. We have fun little videos of our live shows, all kinds of fun stuff. But we also just announced on there a brand new piece of merch an amazing muscle tea that says do you have children Detective, which we talked about on the podcast Wanting to make Merchants said that, and we've done it. It's really cute and it's your

I have some things for the introduction.

So yesterday while I was doing some work, I had you know, TV on in the background. That's kind of my huge And Hulu has some perfect movies on their roster right now, like everything that I grew up on. So I watched Center Stage and mister Deed's and Browse Dods Dodds in both of them. Oh wow, he's like a prolific actor. I mean to do double movies and he's in both. I was like, what the fuck? Like, I couldn't believe it.

I know, he was always like a guy. I kind of knew who he was. And then wait, is he in while you were sleeping? Or am I crazy?

No?

That's a different person. Was he My mom loves that movie?

Wait? Am I like crazy?

No?

I think, why is this a twenty seventeen romance from Korea?

This wild He's in movie? He's in while you were sleeping. I think he's the one that is sleeping, Like right, he's the sleeping guys.

I think so.

And then Bill Pullman's the one she kind of falls in love with, like while the other guy is sleeping.

Is that. I don't remember this movie very well. I watched it when I was a lot younger.

So she, uh, it's hysterical. So she Sandra Bullock. She Sandra Bullock plays a token taker at the train station and it's a Chicago set movie. Yeah, And so then she just has a crush on this one guy that's truly like a fantasy. She doesn't know him, he just gives her tokens every day. He falls in the train tracks or has a heart something happens. She saves his life and then goes to the hospital, but she wants to see him and when the so she goes, I'm

They just don't make movies like this anymore, with like mistaken identity and like funny little high jinks.

Like this, They don't make them.

This is yeah ninety five, this is a so yeah, he's he's the sleeping guy. He's the guy in the coma. And that's how I sort of always knew him. I think that was his first Daddy Dodds, that's his first for into my life. But then the data on the oc A show I didn't even watch. I just feel like that's kind of what got him into everybody's consciousness. That might have been like his big break, like one of his big break moments.

But maybe I'm wrong. Everyone's gonna write me.

We get all these comments like how are you not talking about how this person was in the nineteen thirty six revival of this movie, I'm like, I haven't seen everything out there.

Well, so, but Zoe's Sildana, isn't it in Center Stage?

Oh yeah?

I'm like, who would a fucking guessed that this Crossroads SVU center Stage girl was gonna be the highest grossing actress of all time. She is her movies. She's in Avatar and Guardians of the Galaxy.

Yeah, oh wow, two movies I've never seen, but yeah, makes a lot of sense.

Correct, we've not seen them. Two movies that have made over a billion dollars.

Sure, oh my god.

Yeah, and she's in blue and green, and like, I just it's impressive. It's you know, and in center stage, it's like, does the one black girl have to be the one with the attitude? And it's like, you know, she just comes and being me. But also there's this other girl in that movie. She was also in Ten Things I Hate About You, And I bet she thought she was gonna be like a famous, famous girl and then she wasn't. Yeah, do you know who I'm talking about? Her name is Susan May Pratt. Not a name that

I recognize this girl big time from movies when we were younger for Friday.

So she's just like a young actress.

And in a row nineteen ninety nine and two thousand, she's Ten Things I Hate About You, Drive Me Crazy, center stage huge, huge, And then since I mean, she's been working, but it's mostly like you know, character actor, like a guest stars. She's just like one episode of shows and so she's working incredible, she's doing this for

It's so funny because like one of the first things that comes up is like, what happened to Susan May Pratt? And then it's like and then it's like, oh, she's still acting, but she's also a mom and a wife and she married another actor and blah blah blah. She's married to some guy who's in like Jericho and like Star Trek, Discovery and stuff.

So I bet my husband knows who he is.

Yeah, it's a great life, No, Shade, I would love to have the amount of credits she has. I just she was kind of like bitchy girl, right, she was the bitchy girl, but not but not in Ten Things I Had About You, she was like kind of dorky and loved Shakespeare. She went on a date with Dave Crumbholts. Okay, that was her prom date. Dave Crumbholdts, the mushroom Man.

Okay, from what everything size Back says everything ties back to stew Let's be honest, what else is going on? Well, I took Oscar for a little procedure in the hospital yesterday. Little guy who was getting he got little tubes in, but they asked me to get there at five forty five. His procedures not till nine thirty. He can't eat anything since the night before, so it's like he's going, can I have a snack? And I'm like, no, like, sorry,

I go in there.

He's like limp and being fed apple juice out of a baby bottle. He does not drink out of bottles anymore. He is pissed as hell. He's so when he sees me, he's like screaming.

He's so mad.

He does not stopped for like two hours. But he's like he's like a drunk sorority girl. Like he'll focus on the TV for a minute and then he'll be like, ah, like just crime, but it's not pain.

It's just like annoyance. He's just like an annoyed about everything. And it was wild.

I had a wild day with him yesterday and then I had to put him to bed and get right into SVU work.

So it was a fun day.

I just think it's so funny that he can ask for the snack and then you're just like, no, I.

Go, Mommy doesn't have any snacks right now.

Like I just tried to distract him with like TV, like he was watching a lot of Like they gave us an iPad at the place because I had brought my laptop, but they gave us an iPad.

They were lady, there's better technology for on the go.

FE know.

Well, the thing is is Jared has an old ass iPad. I need to get a newer one. He has like an old one that's like you can't load shit on it. I just wanted Mowana, so I just brought my laptop because then I could stream it better. And then Oscar didn't give a fuck about Moana for once in his life and was just wanting to go around all the rooms of the hospital.

But you know, oh my god, it was wild.

So yesterday me and a friend, I wanted a McDonald's die of coke, as you do, and so we get into the drive through and I didn't realize, like, Grimace is in right now. You know, it's his anniversary, it's his birth that like everyone's into Grimace. There's like a fun tweet that's like I went and asked for Grimace shit, and someone's like, who's Grimace And the woman's like, he works here, But but they have they have a new shake. They have a Grimace shake. I didn't get it, but

He goes, we have the bird and the dog. Fuck is that mean? Wow? That sucks one of the.

I got the Bird and the Dog, but like not even Scott's actually hot.

Scuttle has a really fun song in the New app and The New Mermaid.

So my actually really into scuttle right now.

But like she always wants me to play the scuttle Butt song that that she that Aquafina sings in the movie, which is like a rap. More but that's so funny because moms in my mom group are like, does anybody have the Ariel Mermaid toy from Happy Meals? Like they're like looking for them, so like they're on the They're.

I don't know who has them.

I don't know if it's like a trick, but like why not just make airas like why not make a ton of the No one wants the dog?

The dog? Who wants the dog? He's in the movie for three seconds.

And just the way he said it, I was just like, Yeah, I'll take the burden the dog.

So I have wait, so you just pay for the toy separate, you can do that. Yeah.

One time a McDonald's tried to deny me and said you had to buy the Happy Meal. But it must it must have been a new employee you're allowed to buy him.

Yeah, yeah, I saw Grimace is really like having a you know, glass is a Grimace is a legend an icon the moment right now.

Yeah, all the staff had like cool purple Grimace shirts too, but I didn't want to be like.

You're so lucky you got those shirts. But they are they are purple. They are repping Grimace on SBU every day.

Yes, yeah, I'm trying to think if people have just listened to the like this is the first episode of the podcast they've ever listened to.

That would be so funny if you tuned into a podcast and you just popped on episode like one and thirty four.

But that's what I do.

I mean, if I'm trying a new one, I usually start with the most recent or like a guest I like or yah, you know, like I don't always go to the top.

I yeah, I'll listen to like the last couple and then if I like, I'll start from the beginning because I'm like a like a complete list.

Oh see, I bounced around because it's so guest specific for me. For most podcasts, Yeah, I want a good gut like I you know, I mean, I'll like for some well, I think.

The only podcast I really did that with was Bitch Sash. I just wanted to Like they had only been on for a year, so I was like, it won't take me that long to get through their back catalog and so, and I was driving a lot at the time, like to jobs and so, like I pumped through that whole thing. But like who Weekly is a podcast I listened to all the time. I'm sure I think other people that

I was like, a thousand fucking episodes. Jesus.

Well, I felt cool because I recommended a guest for one podcast that I listened to, and so I got to listen.

To the guest that I connected. Oh cool be on the show.

So it was Ali Colbert's podcasts, and I was like, you should have Sophie Santos on and so that like I felt like a little producer in my car listening to the episode.

I mean, I just did hers too. I'm about it's about to come out soon, all.

Right, Well start us with you. I did learn a new fact. So we were talking. I don't know how it came up. I was with some people yesterday and the conversation came up as like, how the Rock, like the WWE owns the Rock. That's why he's starting to go by Dwayne Johnson because if you use the name the the WWE.

Makes money off of it.

And that's why John Cena they own John Cena because he used that name. So anything he makes the ww he makes money. And I knew that, but John Cena doesn't give a fuck. He goes I'd be no older without them. I don't give a shit. He's like a company man, you know, he follows rules, he wears cargo shorts.

Yeah.

So then someone there goes, well, I'm friends with a supermodel and once she stopped modeling, she just sold her name and now is like made a billion doll Like is now such a million?

And I was like, wait, what are you talking about? And it's Kathy Ireland.

So in the nineties the Kathy Ireland collection at kmart.

But she has nothing to do. She just sold her name.

And so after she was like done being able to model, cookwaar, clothing anything, everything, like she just makes money off the name instead of her body and face. And I was like, that is fucking cool. Because at first I was like, oh my god, why would you do that? But then it's like, yeah, she just is raking it in And I loved her. I thought she was one of the oh so beautiful of the supermodels. I really loved her always as a kid. But I'm like, way to go,

It's funny.

When we were growing up, like the supermodels really were like full celebrities, like right next.

Door to like Leonardo Dicapri.

You know, like you'd be like, oh, I know, Cidy Crawford, Naomi Campbell, Christy Turlington, Claudia Schiffer. There was like like the era of the supermodel. I know, now there are big models and they have millions of followers on Instagram and stuff, but are they like as household.

Well, I'll tell you what shifted.

I do think like Gigi Hadid, Kendall Jenner, like the NEPO baby models are huge, and you know there's like Coco Rocha there's famous, but like I don't think the celebrity is the same because of Instagram, yeacause we only had the models, we only had the sports. Like now everyone is a hotty, Like everyone online is hot, everyone is sexy, everyone can sell stuff. Actresses, you know, Anna Winter was the first to do it. But like actresses

Exactly or even like and even the ones you mentioned, Kendall and Gig sort of got big from TV stuff before they like as they were modeling, you know, so like TV kind of gave them a Alley oop and like Ashley Graham is like so huge. Yeah, I follow her do A lot of people know who she is, Like Cindy Crawford, Like, yeah, I don't know, but the Cindy Crawfords are the Kendall's and Gg's and Bella's, but to me their net Bo babies, So I don't give

I don't remember that, but I remember like, yeah, Carra Delavine. But again, they're all just like rich girls. They come from wealth. So I don't know about the nineties models, but I don't think it was the same.

Like or is anybody ever getting like discovered at a supermarket and then they're like a massive model anymore?

Like I don't know.

It feels like you come from a NEPO family or you're rich, or you're like Kara Delavine from like London or whatever British society.

No, Kate Upton was, Oh yeah, Kate Upton. She got wreck. She got found by doing like a little dance at an NBA game on the JumboTron. Oh, and that's how she became a household name. And she has one of my favorite magazine covers of all time. But and then the girl from my high school. She was a victorious secret angel. She Dave Leonardo DiCaprio. She was discovered on the beach on a vacation to Florida with her friend from high school.

But she is no longer a model, So damn.

Yeah, I'm not seeing anything from Kate Upton lately either.

Where's that girl been?

Well?

I guess I could check her Instagram. Maybe she's just living life belong.

Now he's giving us the second flag. All right, we got to start this episode. We got a hot one for you today, don't go anywhow.

Hello.

Okay, So we are doing October Surprise, which is a fun title. Honestly, I always we always give shit to Warren Light, but I kind of like this one.

But I think that this is a political term.

Oh I don't know that.

Like, I think it's a political term to call something in October surprise. It's like people whip it out to fuck you right before the election in November.

Oh, that's even more clever. This might be the best Worn Light title we've seen so far. I'm gonna go out on a limb and say that, and it's season fifteen. On Hulu it says five. The official it's episode six, Live Your Lives people, it's six.

We don't go buy Hulu's bullshit.

I know, but then I don't want people later being like it's actually five, and then media having to be like, how dare you correct me?

So I just have to do this ahead of time. So we're starting off.

We're watching a news broadcast about the New York mayoral election, and holy shit, it's Lester Holt and he's playing a Channel eight news anchor and I feel very connected to him. So I thought he was a Chicago anchor and started that way, but it's not. He's always been national news. Is Lester Holtz a part of your heart or how do you?

Yeah? You know?

I've played drinking games with Lester Holt one time during the Olympics. Yes, after the Olympics, Lester Holt and a guy who was on camera at WNBC, which is New York's like NBC News, they came and played kings with us.

It's like you know, where you pull cards.

And they all make you do something like, oh, this one's a waterfall, this one you got to.

Make up a rhyme or something like that. They played.

They came and play games with us. Love Lester Hole. He was a fun time. That was at the Olympics in to Reno thirteen years ago, no longer, way longer seventeen.

That was so that's so good to hear. Yeah.

He was a CBS reporter and anchor from nineteen eighty one to two thousand. I mean, how many people do know that have kept one job for that long? Yeah, and then he was at NBC News two thousand to present. He does the nightly news and Dateline. And in twenty eighteen there was a poll on The Hollywood Reporter and

I like this Hole.

I feel like Lester Holt kind of like Brian Days used to be very trusted and then he wasn't. Mott Lower used to be very trusted, then he wasn't. Lester holds still kind of the guy he is. He took over for one of them. I think Bryan. I think Bran. Yeah, so whatever. Just to start with Lester, I can't.

I thought he was like my childhood, but I guess he's just always been for everybody, not just locals.

Lester holds for the people. Yes.

And so the lead in this fake mayoral race is Alejandro Mugna Munez.

God, this is going to be a nightmare episode for me.

So we cut to him doing a speech to the people of the street, you know, to the people on the streets of New York, and he's really getting people pumped up. And then it cuts to a roundtable dinner type function and he's campaigning and he's trying to be super inspirational. He has a wife no one wants anyone in politics that's single. And guess who she is? The mom from the episode Loophole from two thousand and seven. So she's the actress name Karen Olivo, and she's a

So she's working and I.

Think we got in trouble a little bit from some of the Broadway babies that listen when we didn't mention that during loophole. So here we are mentioning it now, giving Karen her props.

Another man is speaking and it's another Broadway baby. So it's a really star studded cold open if you ask me. And this guy's name is you know him, Leslie Odom Junior. He's the reverend and he loves Munez. He can't get enough. And we cut to some men clapping and holy shit, it's oz Icon Kirk Acevedo, who I love. I am like obsessed and he's been enough U s views. And then to keep the star studdedness of the cold open going, future pedophile Hank Abraham, friend of the Pod and og Ninja Turtle.

So we love Josh Pisce. Yeah we should say his name.

Well one, yeah, Hank Abraham's the pedophile, Josh Pisce is the Ninja Turtle. Yes, and he was a great guest as well, and so if he would And then people were like, I can't believe you didn't mention the sex and the city thing when he was a guest, But I was like, oh no, we talked about it. We had to cut it out. But maybe if you see us live you can ask us why yeah, not everything makes it in So if he wins, he would be the first Hispanic mayor of New York City and he's

So the wife is talking.

About core values and calls up the father of her children and he comes up to cut the ribbon. As he's cutting the ribbon, we get an amazing editing sequence and the pair of scissors jumps to another Broadway superstar.

Jesus this cold open.

Annalie Ashford, wife of a former guest Joey, taps thank you tapper, and she's holding up scissors while saying I'll cut you. I swear to God not great. So who are the scissors pointed at. It's mister Personal Business himself, kirk Oscevedo, and he's begging for her to put the scissors down.

He grabs her pushes her against the.

Wall and uh oh, the police come running in right at that moment as she screams, he's breaking my arm.

He says he's on the job with the doc.

The cops make him step back and make her drop the scissors. Her nose is bleeding, and she says that he was trying to rape her, and he's like, what the fuck, no way, our blonde victim. Lindsay is now in the hospital with Benson and tomorrow she is like, thank god, the cops got here so fast. I don't think I'd be able to hold him off much longer. That was a good impression, right, yeah, thank you. So she has like a baby nasal voice throughout this episode.

Care of it.

So he looks back in thought and he's like, uh oh, what am I gonna do? So you know, that's what I would have called this episode Old friends or morals?

What will Barba choose? We're back from the credits.

We have my favorite guy, Eddie is and he's an interrogation with Finn and Rollins and he's like, listen, I'm sorry I hurt her arm, but she's gonna cut my balls off and he said he was there to do the right thing, and Rollin snickers and he's like okay, and what's that. He explained she was pregnant and that he had to pay up, and Finn is like, well, and you don't think.

It's yours, Like what's up?

And I'm thinking he's gonna say I didn't fuck her, I had a vasectomy.

There's no way.

But his excuse is that he actually has a super strong pullout game and so that's why this baby can't be his. And so he just went over there to get some sense knocked into her, and he actually has to rush if we can finish this up because he has to go visit his son's school. But there they still have questions because they're like, well, what sense were you trying to knock into her?

Like what's up?

And basically she wanted to have an abortion and he's Catholic, so he doesn't believe in that, so what an idiot? And then Finn is like, well, it's we found two thousand dollars on your person, so were you going to pay for the abortion her?

Pay her? A like what were you doing with that?

And he's smart and he's like, oh, I'm actually not going to be saying anything else.

Thank you. Benson joins Barba in the spying area.

And she's like, this case is way below your standards.

What are you doing here?

And Barba explains in sidebar that the mayor mayor old candidate Alex Munez hit him up as an old friend and that they grew up together with Eddie and they were the three Musketeers of Jerome Avenue. Alex had heart, Barba had the mouth, and Eddie had the muscle. They didn't super stay in touch because you know, they all stayed in the Bronx and he went skiing and shot, so their friendship did not last or you know, they're still friends. Benson is shocked that the mayor candidate has

Like, well, she would do this for you, so shut the fuck up.

So we go visit our blonde girl, Lindsey, and she's vaping and the detectives enter into loud pop music and there's clothes thrown around everywhere in the apartment and Amar's like, oh, you don't have to preserve the crime scene and she's like, hmm, it always looks like this. So then Benson is like, put your cigarette out and we're all like, that's clearly a vape. Benson, like, I thought you were a detective like that, that's not a cigarette.

It doesn't she's not holding it like a cigarette.

They're even I mean now vapes are more prevalent, but like, they don't look like each other. Yeah, it's just she looks like an idiot, but Benson judges her for the vape. Anyhow, they are there to get scoop and she gives it up while sitting on a white, furry little seat.

So she says that.

They met her and Eddie met while he walked into her shoe store about six weeks ago. She's a foot model and a shoe designer. I don't believe her. And then she keeps talking and she does work retail between gigs, and I'm back believing her. So Benson of course knows the brand of the shoes, and she's groping them like, ooh,

Knows one of Benson knows one of these girls, that's like, I'd rather talk to him, Like we've seen a lot of those from her Maloney days for Tomorrow Days.

There's a lot of them. She's like, after you, I don't know, does Caresy ever get that kind of treatment?

Not really, Lindsay and her bold rep red lips stay and she says that she doesn't want to press charges anymore. He says, that's a little too late for that, babe. And Eddie is a good guy. We just got too hot under the collar. He's like, wait, wait, wait, so yesterday he was trying to rape you and today he's a good guy, and Tomorrow, angrily and like anger in his face, asks did someone tell you not to talk?

And she's like why would you say that?

Dramatic music begins to play, and we just cut to Benson and Barba in an elevator. Barbara is fact checking the slut. He says that Eddie hasn't seen his wife in three years and there's no way he was there six weeks with her. She lives in Miami, and Benson goes, well, yeah, but he's wearing a ring and Barba's like, yeah, yeah, he's Catholic and loyal, that's why. And Lindsay saw the

This time?

Finn and Rollins are there and he did take out an order of protection against her.

So how did you guys meet? So she friended it.

She facebook friended him after he started the charity, and she's like, very into school issues, she said, and Finn is like, you're a fool, and he goes, yeah, I'm probably naive. He does confirm an affair, so it's he calls her the perfect intersection of hot and crazy. But it went wrong because he underestimated the crazy and started demanding money and when it wasn't enough, she would boil.

JK, it's your fault. You had the family, you fucking idiot.

And then he lost a giant grant from the Gates Foundation and Rollins is like, wait, hold up, did she know about the grant? And he goes, yeah, we had a big press release. And then now he finally realizes again he's like so naive that he got got and he's really sad and he's like, oh, I'm man, it was always about the money. So now we have a giant picture of Lindsay on the corkboard, and Lindsay is a great crazy girl named for sure. I believe, all

So I love that part.

Well that's from isn't that an Amanda Bynes thing. Amanda Bynes tweeted, I want Drake to murder my vagina right around this time.

God, you know you really have a memory that serves this podcast. That is great. I hope Amanda is doing good. I know she's recent episode. I love her.

We're gonna get a really crazy biopic about her one day, and we're all gonna feel bad about what happened. I think we already feel bad. I don't think enough people to. Oh really, a lot of people are like, whoa, that crazy girl, and it's like we need to get the full, like we the full.

Britney spearsing of it all, where you know what's going on. Yeah, even though we don't have that yet. For Brittany, I feel no.

I mean, now there's rumors that we haven't seen her in forever and it's a body double. And then Kevin Feederline's taking the kids to Hawaii because I guess in Hawaii you have to pay child support till you're twenty five, but on the mainland it's eighteen, so he's taking the kids to Hawaii to continue getting money or it's.

Twenty two or something like that.

So I posted something recently that her mom showed up at her door and that they're reconciled.

Oh whoa.

But that also adds to the sketched body double and that she's been I just who knows these women give us so much. I mean, Amanda minds was. I mean, both of them are so talented, but Amanda is just like a comedic little teen child genius so good.

I used to have her.

Milk got milk ad magnetd to our fridge because I wanted her hair. She had like gorgeous hair in the gut milk ad the gorgeous blonde highlights. Anyways, murder my vagina merch. Now we're back. So this girl has gone back and forth about pressing charges. So maybe Barba is right and we give Eddie the benefit of the doubt. Amara was like, listen, all the other marks were worth the risk. They were all rich people. Eddie works at Rikers, So maybe the target's actually mayor Alex.

Drum beat bump, bump, bump bumb So.

Now we have a courthouse hallway walk and talk with Benson, Amaro and Barba and Amaro phills Barbara in Eddie wasn't in a relationship with Lindsay and wasn't trying to rape her, but we think it was with your buddy Alex, and he was shaking him down for Alex, and Alex sent Eddie over to tune her up. Barba glares with anger. He's like, if you knew Yelina, you would know he

I'm not standing in your way.

So now Rollins is talking to a classic landlord vibe guy, you know, coffee cups, cigaret hanging out his mouth, and he's like, yep, she moved out last night, four suitcases in a limo, in a hurry. She left a lot of shoes, size six. So if you want some shoes, take them up. So Amar and Finn are at a campaign event and he's talking up his wife and how she's pretty and smart and you'd all be lucky to

But like, is he covering for you or what? He says.

He's a happily married man and he's never met Lindsay and he swears on his mother's grave like a real housewife at a reunion, deny, deny, deny. He's like, why what did she say? And they're like, ah, nothing at all. She left her apartment last night and we're tracking her down. He just smiles and walks off, and he does not give a fuck and is not nervous. So I Fin and Tomorrow are walking being like, huh, what are we

Thing because even when we were all big on Facebook, we weren't doing that, Like, even when Facebook was the thing, you weren't poking.

No, but it is just such a dork thing, like ha ha, I like you you know what I mean, Like it's just so Harvard. So she liked his photo and her most recent photos are on a plane headed to Israel for her new job as a political consultant to the Labor Party in Tel Aviv.

L oh L.

Like she was just living in a fully like dishovel apartment with a bunch of shoes and no, she's like off to help the Labor Party in Israel.

Audios, shalom. You mean.

So we run to Hay Abraham's office aka future pedophile.

And so current.

Yeah, So, how does a former shoe clerk work in your client's political campaign in the Middle East? I didn't realize New York mayors have political campaigns in Israel.

What is happening? I don't know?

Can someone please write to us? I don't understand what's happening? He corrects him shoe model I believe. Then he's smugly is like, wait, how is this Svu's concern? He also says, I mean should I call the DA because I'm handling his campaign? So what's up? And Finn is like, you do whatever you need to do and Omar I was like, I mean, it's gonna look pretty bad a spin doctor who can't control bad press about his own office. And Kank says, okay, can we just handle this quietly? It's

You don't miss done. Done.

So they go to the apartment of Eddie and a child answers the door. His dad is home, and the dad like sends him back to the apartment into the apartment. As he approaches the door, his voice is raspy and he is looking great.

So they got some questions for him.

He's like sure, so the DA is dropping the assault charges, right, and they're like yeah, but this is about witness tampering. He seems confused about what they're talking about, and Finn's like, well, what was the two thousand dollars in your pocket? He's like, I told you it's for the abortion and Rollin's is like, you mean the one you don't believe in, so a lie. Rollin's is like, we think it's money Alex gave you to shut her up, But to me, that's not a lot of money.

Yeah, maybe it was just like a first installment. They just got to get her to shut up for ten more days. You know, two grand is just that's right, that's a month of rent. Yeah, because her apartment was nice. They try to make it look shitty, but we know what New York is, and it was a great apartment.

It looked pretty good.

Yeah, he says, look mad. Respect Okay, what but his lawyer told him he doesn't have to talk to them anymore.

Rollin says, by lawyer, do you mean Alex?

And he's like, I gotta go cook dinner for my family and he shuts the door. Barbara's at his desk working late as Yelina walks in and she's in a cocktail dress and they speak some Spanish and hug and she's on her way to another rubber chicken dinner. He says, well, then they're very lucky, and you know they giggle. So what's up? She says, you tell me. Detectives came to

He says he can't talk about this with her.

Yalina says that Alex didn't marry a fool and he's on the verge of doing something really great for all of us. Then she says, Poppy, don't ruin his chances, and I love that. Barbara says, if he has nothing to hide, then he has nothing to worry about. She nods and says, so it's like that, hmm. So she just tell me one thing? Is this in any way about us? They stare, He doesn't answer, she walks off.

I guess this is like one of the I watched this show always thinking Barbara was gay, Like I never saw the Barba Benson thing. But I guess this is one of the times where he does have maybe a thing past thing with a woman that I must have missed.

Yeah, but they're also all young. Some people don't care, so you know grad school, but he's.

Flirting with her a little bit, Like I think he plays I think Barbara plays him by, but like he's flirting with her a little bit. So I get, but I don't see that with Olivia, the flirting.

I see it with this woman. Yeah, no, Barba is by.

So we got our cuties in a side room with the blinds down. So we have Benson, Tomorrow, Rollins and Finn waiting for Barba to enter. He enters and is like, where is the fire? So there's a laptop propped open, and uh oh, there's something that they need him to see.

Omaro explains.

Since Lindsay found her other marks from social media, we decided to do some investigating. So Rollin's, the Queen of the Flirt, went online and set up an iHeart Alex Midez for Mayor page. I can't even say it without laughing. So he messaged in a half an hour and wrote, hey babe, and Barba's like, wait, you set up a honey trap and she proudly says yes, That's why I came here from Georgia to be your it girl.

Yeah.

He then suggested to take the convo off a less public site. And they went on a site called Pleasure without Conscious Conscience. Oh my god, you know that word really trips me up. Uh oh, so this is Pleasure without Conscience dot com. It's a cheating site and he has an account and his alter ego is Enrique Trouble. She sent a sexy selfie at you know, cleavage and Rollins shows it off to everyone and goes, thank you, thank you.

I'm a slut. Barbara keeps being.

Like, sure, this is a hoax, like this isn't real, and she's like, well, I asked for a photo, so we're waiting for a response, and Barba then goes, well, don't hold your breath. He's at an event right now, a fundraiser with his wife and daughters. And Barba's like, he doesn't have fucking time for this, and Finn knows the game and he goes, no, man, guys like this make time.

Guess what ding ding ding?

We got a reply tuxedo shirt and suspenders down in a really hairy chest and I like it.

She says, is that all you got? Ding ding ding?

And now it's him in his underwear with his dress pants around his ankles, ding ding ding. We don't get to see this, but Finda's see a picture and he goes, that's the full Muno.

Muno's moons, Munyos, Munhos.

That is the full Munyos. I don't even think my tongue moves in that way. So tomorrow looks some mug like see told you, and this dude wants to be the next mayor of New York and Barba's in shock. So now Barba and Munyos are at a cafe diner Vibe and it looks like my perfect restaurant. I would love to get some corn beef fashi at this place. So Munya's is like, this is did I do it again? Munos? Munyo's is like this is terrible. Someone's setting me up.

Shut up.

So someone else sent the pictures of your penis and he's like, I'm not even gonna dignify this with an answer, and Barbara's like, well, i'm your friend and you better start speaking up.

And he's like, I was hacked. I was hacked, and Barbara.

Goes, great, we'll get our tech team on it, and he goes, no, no, no, my team will be on it, and it's like, fuck you. Yeah, He's like, how can you believe this? It's obviously Wall Street trying to keep me out of City Hall, and Barbara is done. He says, you better start being honest with me and honest with yourself. You came for me, You came to me for help on Eddie's behalf and Alex is like, yeah, cause you're

Bad choice.

So Barba is back with his crew, saying that he thinks Wall Street is setting him up. And Tomorrow does not like this, and it's like, wait, you gave him my head's up? What the fuck? So not only is he tampering with witnesses, he now has you to cover it up, and Benson plays teacher. Barbara yell's have you found any evidence yet? And the answer is no, not on the public sites, but they're gonna keep checking. Barbara walks off and a tizzy, but Amaro stops him on

Gonna look like a political hit.

Barbara goes into the elevator and Tomorrow jumps in at the last minute to join him. Barba's like, oh great, you're giving me a ride. Thanks, then says I'm not cutting him a break because we're friends, and Tomorrow's like, yeah, I don't think it's about friendship.

It's about you.

You're afraid to go after him because while he stayed in the hood and played man of the people, you went off to Harvard and pretended you were one of the whites.

He says, Green goes, but I felt silly and he's playing.

He's playing you, dude, he is making you feel like a sellout. And Barba's like, okay, yeah, thanks for that. Bodega psychoanalysis. Detective ha ha, I love Bodega psychoanalysis. I really like it. Maybe a bracelet, maybe maybe a bracelet merch Bodega psycho analysis. So they speak Spanish to each other and split up. Benson asks Tomorrow as he walks back, and if they are okay, and he says, guys like

Like, dude, there's so many puns.

Benson runs over to him like, dude, if it is a political corruption case, we have to hand it over to the feds. Anyways, Finn is like, what are we gonna send over the picks he sent to Rollins, and Rollins is on the laptop saying that she's not the only one and that his alias Senrique Trouble is popping up on other sites.

It goes back over a year ten so far.

Finn says that makes him a dog, not a criminal, and Finn's body language is full lazy boy at this point, like he is a lounging at work. Rollins goes well, except one of these women that he was sexting with just got an executive position at the New York Gaming Commission. Finn stands up slowly and reluctantly. The violins start playing who pulled those strings?

No government background.

Finn, after looking at the pick for a second, says, wait, hold up, I've seen this girl on screen before and it wasn't on c SPAN, so we all know Finn is a porn addict with an encyclopedic knowledge of every porn actress's face. So they go visit her. She's confused, I already have the position. Finn and Rollins walk behind her. Just a few questions, like on your resume it says you went to University of Michigan and they don't have a record of you attending. She's like, damn, I should

She laughs and says no.

Finn brings out the DVD he wants to get it signed, and so he's like, well, I have this DVD and it's called million Dollar a Night Baby. She says, this is unfair, stands up and says that was a long time ago. I didn't do any adult films after that. Are you guys from Vice. I didn't do any adult films. I did nothing illegal. Rollin says, we just want to know how you got your job here, and she name drops Enrique Trouble and she's like, whatever, what if he got me the job?

Who cares?

It's Albany, believe me, there are people a lot less qualified working here. So now they bring and who wants to work in Albanie Jesus Christ. So now they bring the DVD to Barba in a parking garage a la deep throat vibes, and he's like, okay, okay, so let me get this straight. He used his position to get a former porn star a job in Albanie. So yeah, basically that a little text text time, and then six months after that, she was complaining about how hard her

She told him she.

Got a call from a reporter wanting to collab on a book, and then Alex started paying her off pretty cheap again, only five hundred dollars a month. But when the mayoral race campaign came up and he got her a job with the state any money trail Barbara asksinfin is like, no, he's too smart for that. It's always a bagman delivering cash. Every time it's silence. Barbara knows the bagman. So Barbara goes to see Eddie, who's at

And then they talk about how hot his mom is.

So then Barbara sizes and sits down and they have a little talk. Barbara reminisces how Eddie always had his back and took care of him and you know, lunch money protection, and I'm in love with Eddie even though he is anti choice. Eddie calls him his brother and says he would never have learned English if it wasn't for Barbara, and they smile and it's really cute and Eddie's like, we're even right, and barb but goes, yeah,

He nods no.

So the lawyers like he cooperated fully come on and Amorro says, okay, but don't forget. If we find info that you didn't tell us everything, you could still go to prison. So then Eddie whispers to his lawyer and then admits there was another lady and he goes, I didn't handle her. They ask why not, and he has no idea, and he's like, I don't know me because she's from Yonkers and he overheard Alex talking to his

And I love that. Finn says yeah.

Finn says, I mean we can get a warrant, but we'll have to talk to your mom, and so then no, no, please don't call my mom and so she panics.

But this is also why you need to be a cool mom.

So at this situation, your kid's like, yeah, go tell my mom instead of oh fuck, and then gives it all up to the cops. I mean, in this situation, someone's doing something illegal to her, but like whatever, I'm off my soapbox. So she hands over her phone. She is not happy about it. We cut straight to the Five Boroughs Police Association ball October thirtieth. It's a fancy affair. Barba is there. He demands a private conversation. Hank Abraham is like, are you fucking serious? We have CEO and

Like shut up.

Hank's like I'll go with and Barbara goes you stay right here. So Yolina is like what's up, and Barbara again is like, just Alex, this is not a group project.

Okay, let's go.

And so then Alex is such a little creep and he kisses Yelina with his eyes wide open, staring at Barba. It gives her that gross No, his eyes are open looking at him. It's really gross. And then Yolina looks fucking nervous, nervous, worried. So then Alex is like, whatever you have to show me, it won't alter anything besides our friendship. And they're outside in the darkness of night, and he asks Alice, Alex, and now now it's Alice,

He says he had no way of knowing that.

I just went to a high school graduation, and I could tell you it's obvious. Yeah, it's really obvious when these people are children. And this guy just like cannot tell that he is done for this is very scanned of all you are done. Barbara goes really no way to know that even after the picture she sent, you asked her for the pictures, by the way, and they're sexy, and you solicited and exchanged these photos with a fifteen year old girl.

You are in possession of child.

Poor nagriafe dude, and Munios only asks where did you get those? And it's like if you're in a it's again scannaval. It's him going, oh, I would usually have deleted those things from my phone, and it's like no, the normal response is I would never that ain't me, Like fucking idiot. So then he guesses, he goes Eddie, and Barbara scoffs, Eddie, your bag man, you used for everyone except the child because you knew that would upset him.

Yeah, Alex calls him a son of a bitch.

You're using Eddie to swift boat me taking advantage of him. Barbara laughs like, oh yeah, I'm the one taking advantage. Then he flips on Eddie fast like I didn't ask him to do this. Maybe he thought he was looking out for me. Barbara says, yep, m hmm, okay, here we are, Alejandro. I have to turn these over to the special prosecutor, so maybe suspend your campaign and it might go easier for you. Alex says, damn, they got my oldest friend to be a hatchetman.

How much are they paying you to take me down? He asks?

Barbara's like, there is no Vandetta here for you. He cuts him off six days before the election. Barbara reminds him that he risks everything to give him a fair warning, and you fucking know it. He responds, this is what I know, Rafa. Ever since you got that Ivy League scholarship, you've been hooked on their teat.

I don't like that word. He says.

You think you're one of them because you go on their ski vacations and yachts. The man snaps his fingers and then goes and you jump up, and Barbara responds, it's not about me.

And you damn well know it. And he's like, you know what Yolina thinks.

She thinks that you've always been jealous of me because you can't stand to see another Cubano get ahead, because you think there's a room for only one of us at the top.

And if I go down, that leaves you. Let me tell you something.

You take me down, the people will hold it against you and you won't be able to show your face in the barrio.

Your political future will be over. Are you threatening me, Alex?

I'm looking out for you, raffi, And just like the old days, he grabs and squeezes his shoulder and walks away, and it fades to black, and now we're back at daytime and it's a press frenzy insanity in front of the Foundation, so we hear no comment, no commenting, But then he continues to talk because he can't stop himself because he's scannable. New Yorkers are smart, they know the powers that be or terrified of me becoming mayor. Hank Can Yelina stand on either side of him as he

Alex is so.

Frustrated, he just wants to keep talking in platitudes. He says that he was set up by rich people that used the corrupt NYPD to do it. We pull back, and this interview is on a TV screen and it keeps pulling back, and oh my god, where are we?

Who's watching? What's up?

We're in a bar and then he brings up IAB investigations and then names Barba by name and says, you know, my old friend has proven to be the lap dog of the city's aristocracy. Barba, Benson and Tomorrows sit around the bar under a hanging American flag, so we know they're at a bar, Benson asked the bartender to mute it. It also looks like Benson and Tomorrow are just drinking water.

Did you notice that?

No, it's truly, because then I was like, if it was VODK or something, I thought there would be ice. It is truly glasses of water and the condensation looks like water to me.

Maybe they're on the job. I don't know. Oh, you're right, you're right, you're right, you're right, you're.

Right, and they're like, it's really funny. He still thinks he has a shot, and Barbara calls him a brawler and says he gave him a chance to do this quietly, but he refused.

So then Amara was like, well, you know what I will.

I'm gonna go quietly into the wind, baby, and he says good night and leaves. Benson SIPs her water, but Barbara then says, I mean, don't count him out. When I was seven, my mom said stick with Alex. He's going to be mayor of New York someday. She never said that about me. Tears, Oh, baby, bar Ba. Benson asked if he's okay, and he says it's politics. No danger of a traffic jam on the high road. She's like, yeah, but he was your friend, and he adds so was Yally,

He asks, was it?

He is sipping on whiskey, He is not on the job, and he is depressed.

He has clocked out for the day.

Yeah, and unfortunately this episode is not done. I feel like, please be over, but it's gonna keep going. So the elevator doors open and Barbara marches out and there is Leslie Odom Junior again, and he wants a word with Barbara. He's like, your office is ruining the reputation of a man who can turn this city around. And he's spoken like a true man of God, reputation over everything, child porn,

And the Reverend's like, who cares. I don't care about that.

I care about the city's poor being ignored, and he's like, you chose to sacrifice all that because of a Zipper pripe problem. I just love this scene. I honestly this is Chef's kiss. He says, I'm sorry, it's out of my hands now and walks off. But the episode still not over. So we're at a raiment court on Halloween Thursday, October thirty first, and it seems like the lawyer is perfect for Halloween, very spooky vibes.

Alex's lawyer has a white, long haired ponytail. I love it.

The lawyer is saying, release this man. This is all politically motivated, and Yalina is like nodding in the stands, and the judge is like, shut up, save the speeches. Baylist said at ten thousand dollars, moving on, Gavel, Gavel, and then it turns to Barbara and Benson, who are also watching in the stands, nodding, And now it's the final end. I feel like this episode had four endings, like it could have kept ending.

I'm really surprised that it didn't end. After Barbara going was it like it was? It was about work, not personal, and he goes, was it that's to me?

Where it would have ended. Yeah, that's what I mean. There was like four endings. This is kind of like a beef.

Beef had like four episodes that could have been the finale, but kept on trucking, giving us more great episode.

I'm into it. I'm into it.

I have a question, though, what was going on with Eddie and Lindsey though, the thing that kicked this whole thing off. Why was their scissors, Why was their physical physical shit going on? Why were they fighting like that? He just came there to drop off money.

Well, I bet she didn't want to be quiet or she like started mouthing off or something or threatening.

I don't know, you're right.

Like it seemed like he would have Eddie, here's your money, bitch bye, and instead it was like this huge thing and then the cops coming.

Her.

First thing to jump to is he tried to rape me instead of he tried to sab me like whatever.

Like yeah, and Eddie does seem like an upstanding gentleman, like I don't know why he would, but but I mean, she was punched in the face, she was bleeding from her no.

And he said she was trying to cut his balls off. So that's why I was like, what is it? Maybe maybe he said this is all the last you're getting or something like that, and she went fucking ham who knows, But it's just I was wondering about it.

Yes, I think the same as Lindsay two grand Are you fucking kidding me?

Yeah?

Yeah, I want twenty. I think that's so.

She physically went after him with a pair of scizzard and said, hey, volunteer for the campaign. I'm gonna stab you if you don't get me more money.

I love her. Lindsay is a vibe.

Okay, say where you are and I'll give you guys all the real life political tea.

When we come back.

And we're back, and this is just like an episode of Hysteria where we're talking about politics. This is obviously very clearly based on the Anthony Wiener sexting scandal. They make it incredibly incredibly similar, so that you cannot think it's about anything else.

Well, and I'm.

Really excited because I know nothing. I only know just like the headlines, but not the articles, you know, like, I don't actually know anything about this, and I know you're a New York crime expert, so I'm very excited.

I also have to say.

This is very hard for me because I do smell that my mom is baking a cake and it smells delicious.

Oh my god. Okay, well we'll get through this quickly.

Souk and Co put your finger in the icing or whatever. So no, you know, Russian desserts do not have icing. These are peasant cakes. What kind of cake will it be?

Apple cake?

It's apple Jared would love that because he doesn't like cake, but he does love apple pie, and I bet that would be a good crossroads for him. Please ask your mom if she could just scoot a little piece of that into the mail for Jared.

He would love that. So I like this too because.

Even though I lived in New York at the time and I was here for all of this, this really was.

Like such a like punchline thing.

It was like how we never really knew about Monica Lewinsky because we just were like, oh, the stain on the dress, punchline, like it wasn't we didn't really know the full story.

But also, his last name is Wiener.

I know, I know, it's too silly, It's too fucking silly. So Anthony Wiener was a Democratic congressman for New York's ninth congressional district, which is entirely in Brooklyn.

It's like South Brooklyn.

And he was elected in nineteen ninety eight, and he was reelected every two years for six elections up through twenty ten.

He was re elected in twenty ten.

Then in July of twenty ten, he had kind of a viral moment where he made a speech on the House floor about healthcare for nine to eleven emergency responders, and that kind of, like like I said, went viral and got this guy like kickstarted into politics. Like now people are starting to talk about Anthony Wiener more like.

Oh, who's this guy?

Like young, kind of handsome, Like what's this guy's deal? So now that was in twenty ten. Fast forward a little less than a year to May of twenty eleven, and a photo of a bulging crow in underwear appears briefly on Wiener's Twitter account. Okay, so it goes up on his Twitter account and then whoopsie's deleted. But nothing is deleted on the internet. Everybody, you know screenshots or it's say every time.

Sorry to go backwards a little bit, Kara, you said he was a hot man.

Well no, no, no, handsome, I said, like he at the time.

I mean, I don't know.

I'm not saying hot. Huma's very beautiful. She sees something in him back in the day. I saw something kind of cute about him. Not in these current photos. Oh, let me look at their wedding photo. Yep, no, not not hitting it for me.

Yeah, h but I could see how.

But I do love old people on Twitter, just like accidentally putting bold shots on their feet. Yeah, that is pretty comical to me.

Yeah.

Twenty eleven, he puts a bulging crotch photo on his Twitter account. It goes away. The first person to cover this is obviously Andrew Breitbart of the bright Bart blog or whatever. He's a conservative blogger. A few days later, it's May thirtieth, Wiener tells people, my account got hacked. Look, and he says, quote, look, this is a prank and not a terribly creative one end quote. So it's been

He's not answering about whether is that you?

On June sixth, so now we're about ten days out from the scandal, he does a one to eighty and he confesses in tears to engaging inappropriately with women online. He admits the photo is of him and that he lied about the Twitter hack, but he says he will not resign as from Congress and that his wife, Huma Abidon, and he are staying together. Huma abidin we've spoken about

So did people make a lot of jokes about how they're both women, that men are that their husband Like that was a lot of humor, right, yeah, yes, yes, a lot of like standbyer man humor with these two. So days after this confession, it becomes public that Wiener and his wife are expecting their first child. Okay, now this shit starts to unravel very fast. Less than a week from the confession, Wiener says he will seek treatment quote to focus on becoming a better husband and a

Who knows who he sent those two?

And then June sixteenth, Wiener announces his resignation from Congress and apologizes, and he apologizes for quote the personal mistakes I have made and for the embarrassment I have caused. So from the original bulge to the resignation, it's three weeks. This baby is wrapped and done.

Okay.

I think that's what's so confusing about this is like, there are two scandals here. So that's the initial scandal is just the bulge, embarrassing his wife, lying about it being a hack, then eventually saying that it is okay, December of that year, they have their baby. Now, it's that's December of twenty eleven. In July of twenty twelve, he tells People magazine, I've got a good life. I have no plans to run for office again.

Then a year.

Later, May of twenty thirteen, of course, he announces he's running for mayor of New York City because these mediocre white men just like can't help themselves, like you basically left politics and disgrace, but you're still like I could still be great, people could still love me.

Like and I don't know, you.

Gotta give it up for like the delusion, you know, drag delusion. So immediately after he announces his mayoral run, a gossip site releases sex.

Of him and a woman on the internet. And I looked up some of these sects.

They're pretty fucking boring, Honestly, they're like, oh, I woke up kind of hard this or I've been thinking about you hard, and I woke up this morning feeling very eager and blah blah blah, like it's nothing that great. And then more pictures and sexting are by allegedly by Wiener, are released by the website The.

Dirty, and these were all all.

These messages were sent using the alias Carlos Danger, So Enrique Trouble equals Carlos Danger. They are from the same family. And I think that's when people went. When I heard that, I went absolutely insane, Like I remember being like this could not get funnier, like Carlos Danger, Like who does

So I'm not that bad.

I've only been sexting with six to ten women outside of my marriage, not dozens and dozens, is what he's saying. His campaign manager, Danny Keatam, was like a bye girl and quit the weekend after he admitted everything.

Huma stands by him.

He says he will not drop out of the mayoral race, even though The New York Times reads him for filth. There's an op ed piece about how he has how he has problems with the truth. And in September at the Mayle race, he finishes fifth place in the race, which is probably what's going to happen to Alex Munos

This is the same with Anthony Weener.

You know this shit's out there, and you fucking can't stop yourself because you just have to be in the limelight. So there's a twenty sixteen documentary called Wiener, which is so funny, that covers his resignation from Congress and his disastrous twenty thirteen.

Run for mayor.

So now, truthfully, there's three scandals here. Here's the third one. We fast forward to September of twenty sixteen. Now it's three years after this sexting scandal, and a Daily Mail article comes out claiming that Weiener had been sexting with a fifteen year old girl and the FBI is investigating it. So his laptop, So this is the October surprise because this all comes out right before the Trump Clinton election. Okay,

Like, so we covered this and like, you know, you covered it, but Pizzagate is already a thing. But in Jersey Housewives, they keep calling the pizza oven debacle between Gorg and Louis the Pizzagate. Like Joe Gorg is like, ah, more with pizzagate, and I'm like, no, no, it's already a thing, sir.

You can just start.

Calling take pizzagate to me about you and your sketchy brother in law getting into a pizza oven business together.

Yeah, very different. So whatever.

At this point, it's like, yes, I think he did something wrong. Why didn't this come out in twenty fifteen? Why didn't it come out in twenty fourteen? You know, this comes out weeks before the election. So as the FBI starts to investigate, they're looking at they find these emails from the Hillary thing, and that leads James Comy to reopen that investigation very late into the presidential election, and Clinton says it is one of the reasons she lost.

It's like devastating, devastating another man's dumb dick caused us fucking for all of this.

It's devastating, And.

Like, do you wonder if Huma just like apologized to Hillary so much? It was like, I'm sorry I married such a dumbass, but you probably know what it's like.

I don't know.

I wonder what their private convos were like. But also the email, it's just like.

With a what's it's like that one thing was enough, Like I don't know, it's devastating, it's really hard.

Yeah.

But on May nineteenth of twenty seventeen, Wiener pled guilty to one count of transferring obscene material to a minor, and that is when Huma finally files for divorce. Though I don't think that they are still yet officially divorced.

No, they I recently saw news that they're back together and like hanging out, and that's what I saw people online being like, this isn't just like cheating, this is a crime, Like your dude was soliciting shit from a fifteen year old, Like how do you forgive that?

Yeah?

Yeah, I like their divorce was initially in public proceedings. They took it private to keep their save their son from embarrassment. So I know that they work on co parenting together, is what I've read about them. But listen, September of twenty seventeen, he sentenced to twenty one months in federal prison. I had no idea that that happened.

So I'm very familiar. Rush Limbaugh was on there.

I'm very familiar with a lot of the people that were on there, including So he's not a Democrat anymore. No, he is, including Curtis Sleewah, who is a right wing person. They have a radio show together called The Left Versus the Right, where it's a little odd couple thing ha ha ha. But like the show, the radio station is so crazy right, like Trump's people all have channels on that or shows on that channel.

So Wiener apparently just kind.

Of goes along with a lot of what Curtis says, and then I'll be like throw in like one little lefty thing here and there.

But that's what he's doing now.

He wants everybody back in his corner listening to him on WABC. I was thinking maybe he went full right wing, the way we've seen so many canceled men go. But I think he's just actually courting the right wing, because you know, the right wing loves a canceled man.

Yeah that so that So this is what this is what? I oh, it's the post. But it was April of twenty twenty three. Wiener was out with whom at an event?

Yeah, she probably shouldn't be going to events, but I mean the New York Posts had a fucking field day with this, like like covers that say pop goes the Wiener, like lots of Wiener stuff. So yeah, that's the whole story, and they borrowed from it pretty but in like, I don't know, the Wiener October surprise was like on a woman, and in this case, it was like an October surprise for a.

Guilty politician, so you know, s for you doing their own thing.

But Huma got to date Bradley Cooper, Like why would they do this?

We have a really, really awesome guest for this episode, So stay glued to your driver's seat or wherever the hell you're listening to this podcast. Our guest today is not only a talented actor, but also the first guest on our show to be interview whild driving. He's on the move, He's going places. He's best known for his recurring roles on shows like Oz, Band of Brothers, and Arrow. He was also in movies like The Thin Red Line and John of the Planet of the Apes, but you

Yay, Kirk, Like I said, huge, I've been waiting for this since Oz. I'm so excited that you're ge and so he stalked you a little on Instagram. And we love candy corn too, the best.

You're in a safe space.

I like the pumpkins the most, but we both love candy Corn and I couldn't believe it.

It's my seasonal candy top.

I mean, especially when they come out with like the Dark Ones, with the Fall October Fest whatever one, the oh yeahs Delicious.

The autumnal mix. Yeah.

So, Kirk, wait, where are you driving? I know I'm late, but like, what what's going on?

I I am driving to a poker tournament. So that's and yeah, that's where I'm going.

Are you in the New York area or the LA area? Where are you?

Oh? Los Angeles?

Oh okay, okay. I was like, don't drive in New York man.

Oh god, wait is this just a regular thing for you.

That's poker tournaments.

You know. So when I'm not working, I play poker tournaments. I'm pretty pretty good at poker tournaments. Okay, cash at cash first place in the last five tournaments in four weeks. So I'm on a I'm on a heater.

Yeah, do you count cards? I don't even know if that applies to poker.

No. No, that's it's the only place. It's the only casino game that's really seventy percent skill. And then luck. All casino games are luck. Poker poker is so god.

Yeah, that's why I play Roulette. And that's like dumb luck. And that's why I play it because I have no skill.

Oh god, it's like, you know, thirty seven to one because you got to count zero and double zero.

Yeah. Yeah, but it's fun. It's fun.

I mean overall on your I mean, Instagram sometimes is a lie. But your life seems great. You're out working out, you're eating pizza, in the car. You love your wife, you have a beautiful cat, you have kids.

Oh thank you.

You're kind of crushing it.

I mean, listen, everybody's got problems, right, Like nothing's perfect, you're right, like on Instagram, on Twitter, social media in general, Like people embellish a lot. I don't use filters like I just don't. Like if I do a TV show, I never wear makeup. All they do is powder me. You know. I don't shine. I do my own hair. I never get my hair cut in there. I go to my own barber, you know. But yeah, so I try not to embellish as much as most people do.

And your cat is very beautiful in terms of every like it is a gorgeous cat.

Can I curse in here, of course. Yeah, I love that little fucking thing so much. No, no, no, I you know I thought the other like a couple of weeks ago. This is true, and like it brings it literally brings me to tears. I'm like, she's around three, and I'm like, God, I hope she lives to like sixteen or seventeen, because, like I I literally could break down right now. Like, I love that fucking thing so much. It's just I've never loved an animal so much as I love nothing.

Oh wow, our listeners are gonna go wild for this cat content.

They love the cat.

I never thought I was a cat person. We got the cat during the beginning of the pandemic, right, or like we're bored, let's get a cat. What are the worst thing to get a cat for? Right? But wow, we love this little thing.

I love that. I'm glad you're getting time off. Are you gonna run anymore? Marathon? Was your marathon time really impressive? Uh? Three hours? That's like really cool?

Right?

Three hours eight seconds is actually really depressing because if you would have told me I trained for two fifty, but I got hurt at miles sixteen. I tore attendant in my ankle. The t be alice, and so I just thought, okay, my I'm never gonna three hours half a mile out. I'm like, oh, this is gonna be close. And if you'd have told me nine fucking seconds to break three fucking hours, nine fucking listen, Okay. The best thing ever doing was lay six. The worst experience ever

It seems so impressive from a runner, but you would never do it again.

So I injured my back really bad doing squats, and so I can't run the same. I just can't run the same. I can't run as fast because something clicks out. So you know, I'm fine. My back to her like I walk and fine and fine, but just with the running fast, it just my my spine is just just can't take it. I could run slow. Who wants to run slow? It's like, you know, so, have you.

Ever been injured on a set you play a lot of.

Yeah, an arrow arrow? I broke my big toe in three different places and tore three different ligaments, and I was in a boot for three months and I wasn't normal for nine months. That was the worst injury. That was bad because it still hurts, like when it rains. And then one of his arrows, like the back part, you know where the feathers are almost poked my eyeball out. I had blood and scrape right here at iseld like

So you had, you know, several scenes with Marishka. Everyone we ever talked to you is obsessed with her, loves her. Did you enjoy her just the way everyone else did.

Oh, she's she's great. She's absolutely great. She's a sweetheart. I wish I had more scenes with her. But the scene I had, she's like amazing. She's fun. She's like sayings likes dancing. It's the same thing. You know, work serious, but then you know, have fun. It can't be you know, like not the segue. But people talk about Oz and they're like, hey, was it like hot? Was it intense? No? We cracked jokes twenty four seven because we had to because it was so heavy, you know what I mean, Like,

That fun And she's how was Thin Red Line? Was that a fun set? Because that's another heavy thing and band of brothers you do a lot of intense stuff.

Thin Relne was I think my first film, and that was so much fun. The reason why I was so much fun, Oh god, I can't even tell you these stories that these stories would have to be just put it this way. So you're playing basketball with like George Clooney Woody House and every night when they were on when they were there filming their stuff. I was there for six months, and you know, Jim Covisil and the fist fights that would happen. My couldn't miss the fist

Man?

Yeah, very very so. My rooms is still hurting. But Bonds stuff, I mean the pranks on set with Sean Penn doing pranks and Woody House and epic pranks that could have gotten people killed, Like just epic stuff. I'm sorry I can't share it because it's just one of those things I probably can't share, you know, so, But yes, then Red Line was a lot of fun, a lot of fun. Terrence Malix the best sounds like Kermit the Frog in the best way, like his voice, you know,

dB talks about your voice. It's really funny.

IMDb says, like your trademark is your deep raspy.

Voice, my deep brass, my deep raspy voice. Yeah, you know, it's a funny. I get two things. I get I love your voice, or I get are you sick.

You need tea?

Now? You know it's funny because I heard the change in my voice. So my voice was always deep, but it's gotten more raspy as I I have gotten old. It wasn't raspy when I was younger at all. And that's what I missed because my achilles heel, my greatest strength, like is my voice, but my achilles heel is my voice too. Because I can't do theater anymore. And that's because it won't hold up. I'll lose my voice, no damn. Yeah, yeah,

Yeah, night after night that for like a long run. That's tough. Yeah.

Even when I was younger, we do it shows a week. And I was doing the Shepherd play and Tibo and Burnett wrote the music and I had to sing two songs and Anofrio was in it, Vincitrio. I couldn't talk throughout the whole fucking week I was on voice rest every fucking months. Man, Like my life was miserable, like it was you were, you're I can't talk. I can't talk on the phone. And even back then I had a phone. Kids talk on the phone, could talk to people like I'm on voice ress, I'm tea and ginger

I can't.

My ex is coming. I got to show her why she fucked up. You know, every every every motivation you have to use, like I can't be complacent. I'm so competitive. I can't be complacent. I just can't. You rob people of there seventy five eighty dollars or whatever they paid. I can't do it. I can't do it.

You know so many people, have you ever been starstruck?

Yes, one time in my life. Felix Trinidad Oscar de la Hoya fight back in the day. I used to work for HBO. We got free tickets, and I'm sitting right behind Leonardo DiCaprio and Tobey maguire and every time the rose are so small you have to stand ups to people to pass. And there's three CITs, three seats to the right of me that are empty, and every time somebody would passed, they'd stuck on my shoes. You know.

Wait.

You also, you had some scenes with raoul A Sparza. Did you guys get along?

Yeah?

You like him?

Yeah? Nice guy, I mean, first time, first am. I am very nice, you know, and you know it's great about people like Marishka and Raoul or anyone who does this. When you come on someone's show, you're helping their show. Whether you're a guest star, whether you do one scene, you're helping their show. It's their show. What they should do is welcome you into their show. And both of them are a plus in doing that. And so for me, I've worked on shows where the leads are assholes and

Wait, so you're an actor and your brother's a federal agent, your brother you play the roles that your brother does in real life.

Yeah?

Yeah. And also I have a half brother he's also a DC, a police officer in DC, and he was there fucking January.

Sixth Oh my god.

Yeah, so yeah, like I got it, Like it's sterical. All my brothers are like law enforcement.

And wait, but you play so much law enforcement, do you talk to them and ask questions or do they make fun of you, like, what's the dynamic?

No? No, no, I mean it's as long as I hold the weapon properly. And you know, it's so funny. It's like the guy who did What's What's that? Not Hill Street Blues? What was the one after Hill Street Blues? Big cop show? So I did like eight season. You know it's Dennis France, lovely man and the on set technical advisor and c was also a producer and an asshole. Ah, I was a beat cop and it's outside of the school. I have my hands in the buck. He's like, hey,

I mean, this is awesome.

Do you have anything coming up you'd like to tell people about.

Yeah, writing with my wife. We're writing three different projects right now, three different things. It's very, very hard to write three different things. So but each day is a different task. And but just waiting out the writer's strike and I hope the writers get what they want and the actors get what they want. It's well deserved. We can't work without the other.

And uh, well today I woke up and one video I saw that one of the executives straight up was like, we're gonna use AI and we're gonna use AI eventually for editing too, and it's like, what the fuck?

The AI isn't good enough? So so AI for voice overs you could do, but AI for my face in a live action I don't think AI is good enough.

Yet, Yeah, we're human. Can we not have human experiences? It's so fucked up.

And listen like, so they think like, let's just cast an AI, right, let's just let's just go there. Who's going to act for the I What I mean by this is this, So a lot of the beautiful moments happen in the mistakes, right, So in a flow of a line and someone ad libs, that's where the beauty comes in. AI doesn't know how to do that. The

I typed it in. I'm gonna watch it. Yeah, I've not seen that and I love it.

Performance is fucking film. You're gonna be like, why have I never heard of this woman? Because she's brilliant and AI can't do that. AI can't make choices like that.

For sure. Well, we were happy we got you to talk to us. We're excited.

And well yeah we'll look out for like the projects with you and your wife, And thank you so much for talking to us en route to Pokersia.

You guys are the best. I had fun.

Wishing you a lot of royal flushes or whatever.

That was incredible. I'm obsessed with him.

I love that he's gambling, he loves his wife, he loves his cat.

He is the best.

I mean, I think I've fallen in love with a few of our guests, but Kirk's definitely getting at it.

To the list of I'm smitten, I'm obsessed. I'm also just.

Like love how we keep finding out who's married to each other, like his wife, like I remember so well from Staved by the Ball of the New Class, and it's like I just was, like, these two people are married. Like it's just like scrambles my brain every time we figure it out. But I love it, and I love.

The little tidbits about Oz, like it's such a little thing, just like, yeah, we eat all together, whether you're a background or not. Our business is so like the monarchy or something.

It's it's so funny. Wait.

I also, I don't want this to go unnoticed, but your intro you did call his character a loyal knucklehead, and that was very funny to me.

Because I was in love. We gotta give that. We got to give that up to Casey.

Casey put that in the in the outline. That's a Casey. That's a Casey editorial.

Love knucklehead edition, obsessed, obsessed with this episode.

Stop sending dick picks to teens.

That is not like honestly, like, I don't know how to get it through everybody's head at this point. Like the internet is forever. Nothing is, nothing can be deleted, nothing. You're not gonna not get busted for anything you do on the Internet.

Like it's just it's forever.

Oh, speaking of, there are news episodes of The Black Mirror coming out. Oh that Jared Goldstein not a guest to the pot, but a for end of the pod in a literal sense, is in. It is in one of the episodes. So I can't fucking wait.

So cool.

Yeah, I talked to him about it when he did my show a couple weeks ago, and I was like, OKA, wait to see it.

I can't because I don't know if I would be as appointment television, Like, you know, obviously I'll watch a Black Mirror, of course, but like I think at midnight strike of midnight, I cannot wait.

I love Black Mirror.

I'm excited for that, but yeah, like just it's just you know, politicians are no better than athletes or celebrity like movie stars or anything, and just thinking that they can kind of get away with stuff like, oh, I'm just at a level where I'm not gonna get caught. And it's like, but you've seen every person get caught time after time. It's not about the United States is being indicted as we speak.

It's not about the job what they all have to It's arrogance.

Yeah, it's arrogance.

It's like they all are just so arrogant and not to bring us up because it is sad and I can't stop talking about it even though I show I think all everyone is sick of it in my life.

No, it's not vander Pump. It's that boy being eaten by sharks.

Like Eric, you're not jumping the water and not get eaten by a shark.

The shark won't get me. It's like there will get you. But also I get why men think they'll get away with it because they do.

A lot they have they have Yeah, yeah, I just feel like even more, it's just you're less likely to get away with shit now that there's the Internet. Like I'm just we constantly are seeing every day people getting busted like congressmen or governors like writing to gay boys on their instagrams, being like you look great, you know, even though they're trying to promote anti gay legislation.

Or like Trump or any of these people.

It's like, you guys are so fucking dumb and you have a I don't know, it's like it has nothing to do with it, but I'm like, you have this beautiful, dynamic wife at home, Like why are you sending pictures of your bulging crotch to like random set seventeen year olds on the internet. Like, but that's not what it's about, right, It's not about your what like your wife is not is or isn't doing. It's about like these guys being arrogant and need obsessed with attention.

Yeah, and the power element of it, because you know, Louis always comes up in convos and it's like lots of people would have done it. He had money to hire sex worker, like all this stuff he didn't want. He wanted to make people uncomfortable, like that you don't take out your dick at work for fun, like it is to make someone uncomfortable.

That is like a part of it. Yeah, I don't you know, they're just like a little.

Sickos and I guess like what we've learned is like, if you're gonna make up a fake screen name, like just I don't know, go with something simple Steve one two, three, seven, four five, Like let's not do Carlos danger or what was like one in the show Something Trouble, Enrique Trouble and Rique Trouble.

It's disgusting.

It's the and you're old, you're lame, You're chew gee as they say, right, is that did I just become chewgye by not even correct? I yeah, you're like, ugh, it's just disgusting. Yeah, Like every I don't know, Oh, it's listen, I don't know what we learned the same things over and over in every episode.

It's well no, I mean I thought this episode was interesting too, because like it really like we threw Barbara. We saw the like whole loyalty thing, like are you loyal to your pals back home? Like are you all of you struggle to make it to the top. But now some people are letting it go to their head, like how do you handle that?

So the wife did make the wrong choice. You should have been with Barbara? Yeah, Barbara's the better person human mate, probably, like, I don't think Barbara would pull this kind of shit.

Yeah, and we all know he would have eaten your ass like a champ, right, Yeah, so stupid. That's just a reference to our live shows where we ask people that, you, guys, in case you're like, what are you talking about? We don't know anything about actual Barba's analingus abilities. We just like to talk about it at our live shows. Should we move on to what would sister Peg do?

That would be lovely?

You know this segment, guys, this is where we give you, guys, a article, an organization, a podcast, episode, a doc, something to flesh out a little bit more about what we talked about in today's episode. And we thought this week we would just point you to the twenty sixteen documentary Wiener. The doc follows Anthony Wiener as he stages an attempted comeback from his sexting scandal by running for mayor of New York City. It is showing for free on plex.

Called WWSPD two.

So you could just click on that, or you can honestly just google it and it pops right up. You could just watch this on Plex immediately, I think, just if you want to sort of see where some of the like delusion of these politicians is that this guy knew he had more shit out there on himself, and he's, like, you know what, hopping into the mayoral race.

So check it out if you feel it.

Not only that, while you were talking, I was re reminded his last name is Wiener, Like I know you. Also, just why don't you straight lace it if your last name is Wiener?

How about that?

You gotta be on your best behavior if your last name is Wiener. I'm sorry, my god. I used to work with a guy, but he went by Winer. I guess it's like to each to each their own.

But yeah, and next week we have a fucked up episode as always waiting for you. PTSD season ten, episode nine, watch on Hulu or Peacock, which has become my holy grail. I don't know what I would do without Peacock. After we finish today, I am going to watch the uncensored Jersey Housewives reunion extent.

Oh, I gotta watch the last part.

I watched that with the husbands well because all I see are the memes and everyone's like John fudah is a real one, John Fuda, So I.

Was like, yeah, wait to see what John. I can't wait to see what John Fuda does. Good. That's so true.

I saw one last night before I went to bed that was like the one guy you don't want to fuck with is John Fuda, And I was.

Like, what did John Fuda do?

So I'm pumped because he's been silent and drunk the whole season.

Yeah, and all of a.

Sudden, everyone's just like, let's all get in line and suck John Fuda's dick. He protects his family and he doesn't give a fuck. I'm like, Okay, I like them.

I like Rachel and John Fuda, but we'll see, you know, sophomore slump by next season.

I'll probably hate them all. Thanks you guys, Thanks for listening. Come see us live.

We're on you know, we're on TikTok, Instagram, send us an email. That's messed up pod at gmail. We love you guys, and thank you for listening.

That's messed up as an exactly right production.

If you have compliments you'd like to give us or episodes you'd like us to cover, shoot us an email it That's Messed uppod at gmail dot com.

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As always, please see our show notes for sources and more information.

Thank you so much to our producer Kacy O'Brien.

And to our mixer John Bradley and our guest booker Patrick Cottner, and to Henry Kaperski for our theme song and Carly gen Andrews for our artwork. Thank you to our executive producers Georgia Hardstar, Karen Kilgarriff, Daniel Kramer, and everybody at Exactly Right Media. Dun dun