Contact w/ Nicole Sullivan

Of the law and order franchises. SVU is considered especially watchable.

We are the amateur detectives who kind of investigate the vicious felonies.

These episodes are based on. These are our stories. Done done, Hello, and welcome back to That's Messed Up n SVU podcast. I'm your host Kara Klink and I'm Liza Traeger.

We're coming to you fast from We're actually really slow and we're a very long podcast, but we do talk fast. We talked SVU True Crime. We have an incredible guest. It was hard to edit because we talked for an hour and a half, So stay tuned for that joy. And we're actually recording fresh off of our Palm Springs vacation.

Oh, we had a lot luxurious vacation in Palm Springs, or I was without children for two full days, two and a half full days, and it was glorious, such a nice house. We had so much fun.

One of our friends napped and he got up and he goes, no one needed me, No one needed me for anything.

He was like so exciting. Like I woke up one day from falling asleep reading a book on the on an outside piece of furniture, and like everybody was just quietly doing their own thing. People were either sleeping or they were in the pool, but they were in the pool being quiet, Like everyone was just having like a collective quiet time. And I was like, did something happen? Where is everybody? Like I was so disoriented.

We all just said a little mushrooms and then we if you guys don't have these, if you're in a pool, one of the best inventions. It's like there's a blow up tube and a blow up tube small, like a maybe a foot and a half two feet attached.

By a net.

So you put your body on the net and you're like feet and head dangle off the floaties, but you're just fully weightless in the pool. And then I sat in it with my arms up for a while and you're just weightless.

It's cool. They're great. You can't imagine station. You can't imagine you're like, this little flimsy thing's not gonna hold my whole body weight, and it does. It feels like you're just like in a bed in the water. It's great. No.

Our friend who showed up the last day of the trip, I was like, here, use this, and he was like, so skeptical.

He's like, what's the catch?

Like, he was just so not into it, and then I put him in there and he was like, oh, yeah, this is nice.

Sorry if you were.

Trying to get one on me, I'm like, ye't no tricks, just treats, okay, tricks like I am a I like to float U.

Yeah.

It was And I've never been in a pool that was so like windy. I would like, not whindy. How would you say it? It's like you walk in shallow but then it curves so there's like two full pools within a pool, and then there's like in the middle an infinity ledge into like the desert mountains, but then in the center center pool a hot tub, and to the right of that a swim up bar.

I mean, there's like all kinds of like and so many ledges. We've talked about ledges before on this podcast. Just like it's like a big horseshoe kind of but very large, and a little bridge that takes you to the hot tub. You could swim under the bridge. It was fun. We had a blast. And Lisa's bracelets, I know, she talked about them. She made bracelets for the birthday boy.

They were, well, I should have given them days before so we could have wear them all week.

It just never seemed right.

I was in my head about these bracelets and what needed to happen, and it's like I should have just given it to him day one and he could have passed it out and we could have all enjoyed the bracelets.

I don't know why I waited to have it, looking for a perfect time. We kept looking, We're like, this is it, this is the moment, and then one person would walk away. We'd be like, it's ruined, we can't give the bracelets.

Well, then I ended up doing it while our one friend got COVID and had to pass out and never be seen again. Who planned the whole trip and you know sponsored it. We were a little kittens. Yeah on the screen, Yeah it was. It was so great and our friend cooked. I mean, it was just like, I don't think I've ever truly experienced such expectationless hang for days. It was like, you want to do drugs, do not? You don't have to drink, go to bed. I mean my friend, my best friend goes to bed at nine.

I hate her. I'd punch her in the face every second night. If I could.

I know, this is a podcast about abuse and we're anti but like this bitch is always going to bed early.

But like, yeah, people, I was the last to bed every night, but I stayed up late one night with you. Yeah, I was like middle of the road. And then the last night I actually regret. I really wanted to stay up later that night. I know because I thought when you woke up from the couch you'd come. We were playing the movie game in the in the hot tub. You were Yeah, because I knew that. I knew you were sleeping on the couch. Because then when we walked out,

But nothing like it just was like eat when you want, don't eat when you have this thing, float a little, read a book, have a talk.

Change, and we had some We had some characters like that our friends got yoga and like this woman came into taught a bunch of us yoga and it was like she was the most Palm Springs yoga teacher you would ever imagine.

And I skipped down on yoga to float with my three friends.

What was the yoga? What was she like? She was just like you know, she was like very tan and tattooed with like these flower bell bottoms on and was just like yeah, just breathe into your practice and like very just a total cartoon character of a yoga and structure, you know. And then we got an amazing man in our lives. I'll let you tell about him.

I didn't connect with him the way you all did. It made me uncomfortable.

I didn't it and I I didn't. The sprinklers were a gift for me, but I was surprised. I was surprised he was the way he was. I will say that, like I was laughing because I was like this feels like a sketch or like are we being punked? Like essentially we had a habachi chef and he came on and get made like it was amazing, Like we felt like real housewives, like just a dinner. We were like looking at the mountains outside dinner. Very nice. But he

And he would be squeezing this liquor in my mouth, but I would still have like remnants of foods, like the pieces of rice would be floating in the soji in my mouth, and I'm like, I don't want to do that. And every time he came near me with those bottles, I'm like, I don't want to spill anymore. But then he came out with a gatorade giant jug

He keeps cooking.

He is unfazed, and I am joyed that I get to leave and watch pandemonium.

But then I got to lead. We like, you know, shut the power off. I like having an adventure.

But yeah, I loved being like, it's just so I kept thinking of parasite, to be honest, was like, were these like people in this giant house and this? Yeah, but he was happy when the sprinklers went off on us.

Yeah, but he was also like it felt like he was doing a character. He was just like juicy juicy drink.

More like, and he was getting hammered. We're like, are you driving like what he was? He kept being like, you can assign the juicy juicy and then he would juicy juicy in his mouth like he was getting fucking hammered. It just I don't Yeah, I liked the first thing when our friend cooked and we got to just sit down.

Yeah, he was a wild character. But the yum yum sauce was delicious. It was very It was mayo. Of course, we love it. And of course I love it. It was like a creamy sauce that was delicious.

But it reminded me of The Simpsons because they like whatever. It's Marge's twisted world episode with the pretzels, but her nemeses go into business with like a Fleetipeda truck. I talk about this all the time, but like, instead a full offl they're like crunch patties. But Tahini flavor sauce in.

A yeah yum yum sauce is basically like some kind of Mayo dressing with spices. But but we oh, but we're burying the lead.

Kara and I karaoke until two in the morning, and except one person was awake. The thing is I did I was the first to start karaoke that night around six pm when dinner started being cooked or like five, and I was the last. Like I did karaoke for five full hours. I don't know how I still have my throat. But like we were singing Arabian nights, like we were doing deep cut Disney, not the hits it.

Was we did. We did some Alpha Ba and Glinda and then we segued into very deep cut Disney. It was so crazy I don't even know the words.

I feel like we we started with Gaga. Well, it was actually a great experien it's for me and baby. It's because I felt safe because it was all our friends. But usually with karaoke, like I don't want to look at the words. I want to be a performer, Like I want to know a song inside and out, and like I was singing to Green Day songs I didn't really know. Like looking at the words is fine, and I'm kind it's kind of opened me up where I'm gonna be more free at karaoke to just like pick

Also, if you're wondering what happened with the sprinklers, our friends did go inside and grab towels and just cover all the sprinklers with towels so that we didn't just sit getting soaked. And I thought that we turned the water off. Oh they did.

When I originally well because we needed the owners of the house to text us so but before they texted us back, we were throwing towels everywhere, and then we went and turned off the water.

Oh okay, smart, Oh my god. I just couldn't believe it. I was like, I haven't noticed a sprinkler on this house in two days. And then the day it comes on, we're out there sitting waiting. Oh my god.

So then we came home and then our friend was so sick. I've been taking tests like I'm fine, but not that you guys care. I'm not id you, but like you know, I was gonna have one more day at our friend's house, like to lounge before the flights, but that was not gonna happen.

And so the New York crew we went to Alcove. Oh, I love Alcove. I love Alcove. It's one of my favorite places in LA. I'm obsessed with it. But I've never sat at the bar. And we were at the bar for five hours. Oh my gosh.

And then I was like pretty hammered, and I said, do you have a cake flight? And he goes, no, but I'll find you a piece of cake.

And so he got us about to ask you did you eat any cake? Because there was cakes are right near the bar.

Well that's why I was like, I can't choose a cake. Do you have a little sampler cake platter, and he was like, no, but we have some deformed cakes you can have. So he gave us like an ugly piece of cake that looked gorgeous.

I love it, but I had graze.

There's a happy I mean, I love alcove in and out. Give me that tuneam I didn't have the tune them out. But oh my god, we had Jimmy Johns in the way out. Is there not a more perfect vacation than ending on Jimmy John's. No, that's amazing. There was an Arby's surprise. Our friend loves Arby's. You know, we all have our secrets, and his friends ordered him Arby's.

Which have you ever had? I had never had Arby's. I enjoyed my Halopeno poppers.

I was about to say those Jlopano poppers. Yeah, I would eat just those. They were fucking incredible. They were good, better than a restaurant like. I felt like the layers of the crunch with the cream and the fried were perfect.

Yeah, those were really good. I had a couple of Wazzarella sticks and then the people that ordered that got me an impossible burger because they know I don't do Arby's, and Arby's doesn't offer really anything for vegetarians, so that which is weird because I don't think that meat is actually me like, I wonder. I guess their whole thing is like, we have the meat, so we can't have anything else for anybody else.

But you know, I had two, I had three arby sandwiches that we like. I kept making them.

I kept putting my own cheese, oh, microwaving them. It happened. I don't know what to tell you, guys. You know what we were living in a life of luxury. Wait, did you give Rosie her gummy vampires? Loves them? And she loves them even more Oscar Okay loves them. Keeps coming home from school and going, can I have a gummy fang? And I'm like you have to wait till after dinner And he's like no, he like threw a fit yesterday because he could have a gummy fang. Loves them. There.

Yeah, but yeah, I think I hope everyone gets rich friends who get them a giant house, some palm springs.

I don't know what else to tell you, wish that for all of you. That's our problemn expression September for all of you. Oh yeah, when this episode comes out, it'll just have been my birthday. Oh my god, I'll have gone to dinner. I'm doing like a chill birthday because the palm Springs was really taking up a lot of my excitement for you know, weeks. So I didn't really like plan anything, and.

I'm no even yesterday someone said I looked tan and I was happy about that.

That's great. You were very conscious about your sunscreen. Though, I will say, in case your dermatologist listens, if mine does, she certainly hates me. But I was going to say, speaking of birthdays, I want to call out that last week our episode Monogamy came out on John Ritter's birthday. Isn't that crazy that, like a lot of people have message us and been like, did you guys do that

I feel like that is not a coincidence. I mean it is an actual coincidence.

Yeah, but spiritually I don't feel like it's a coincidence. Stars aligning. Yeah, yeah, I do feel that way.

Oh remember when we went some plums for the one time and you got for a tarot person that was yeah, I like.

Yeah, she's great. I like that. She was one that told me there was feminine and energy around my pregnancy even then I had Oscar. But there's still the jury still out on Oscar. He does love to wear a dress, so she could have been completely right.

Yeah, boys can have feminine energy because he also loves Elsa.

He does, and he loves Gabby. He loves a lot of stuff that is classically found.

Wait, Kara, did I tell you too? I also my quick little la jaunt. I went to Laurel Hardware for the first time.

Oh, what were your thoughts?

It's a scene. Everyone's sexy. I don't know how people got to eat in crop tops. That is a confusing thing for me. I don't under I understand crop tops out and about going to dinner and a crop top I will never understand. I mean even if with having like I just don't but a scene buzzy.

We were outside. The food not very good, and I should have known. I think everyone is wearing a crop top. That's the thing. It used to be good. And then I think, because like I used to live by this restaurant, everybody no because you told me about it before, that's ye excited. It's an outdoorsy like Ceni La restaurant, and I used to go there, like take my parents or Jared and I would to go on a date. It's actually the last meal I ate before I had Rosie

No, Like, I would go back for a vibe, Like it seems like a good place for a big group dinner, you know, like you can fit a lot of people. It's a lot of different types of food. But they kept bragging about making the like the pizza dough and pasta in house, and it's like, huh really yeah.

Yeah yeah, And they're always like that's one of the places where they're always like, have you eaten with us before? So everything's designed to share. It's like you're like, okay, but everything is the price of an entree. So it's just funny that you're like everything's designed to share. But I you know, it's it's definitely worth like an LA fun night out if you're in town. Look at us doing unsponsored spawn for Laurel Hardware.

I did so many LA stuff. I went to swingers. I feel like that's very LA.

Okay the diner, Yeah, yeah, I guess that's it. Well.

No, I had a huge moment because I was at Diego's class in West Hollywood for the Taylor Swift Tuesday and as I walked out of class, Taylor had endorsed Harris, so we're very happy.

I sat on a bench and I was just like, yes, bitch, childless cat lady like I was really really happy. Yeah. I thought that she chose good words and she was. It was a good it was a great endorsement. So happy that she has come out and done that. And then Donald Trump on truth social I hate Taylor Swift in caps. So we're dealing with a child and some people are still undecided. It's so fun.

Yeah.

The the evil thoughts that go through my head as you say that is who is the guy Ken in the red sweater?

Got a life? Remember him? Do you remember get in Bone?

Yeah?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm just confused. I hate one is shoe voters, but I am just like abortion for all. Yeah, on demand. Let's we should probably get started because this interview is going to be deluxe because it's it is long.

Well, I can't wait to hear about your birthday. I know you're doing something chill but hopefully spectacular.

Yeah. Maybe some fun uh fun events will befall me, but we'll see as usual. Guys. A reminder that we are on tour coming up very soon in just like three but I'm also sure kids will make you something you sliss. You know, Yeah, they'll do something cute. I will see, We'll see, It'll be no, they will, they will. We're gonna be in Denver, Phoenix, San Diego, La San Francisco, and Portland. Go to That's Messed Up Live dot com for tickets. That's where we have all the legit ticket links.

I also feel like there's a big crossover between exactly right and last podcast left network.

People. Yes, I feel a lot.

Of it might be a big match made in heaven for a lot of you. Yeah, so if you're out of a guy, I'm gonna start prank calling the dial.

Yes, oh my god, don't dare you? You start calling in and like disguising your voice. You're like, I host a podcast with this dumb bitch, and I'm like, Lisa, stop calling. But yeah, so those are That's like a new thing I've got going on. Go see li'sa on the road. Come see us on the road. Guys, we're excited, we're working.

I do have one more thing to add, and I apologize that we can't stop ever talking. But I was staying at a friend's house while he was out of town in LA and his roommate left the oven on. Oh my god, Oh you know I'm sensitive to monoxide like most humans, yes, mentally, and like you would already told me about your family's like aversion to even candles, And so I immediately texted you back, going, don't tell your mom like she cannot know about this.

Like I was like couching, like, god, a man, I'm watching Southern Like I don't feel what's going on during a historic LA heat wave. It's on four hundred degrees. Oh my fucking god, I'm glad you made it out. All right, let's get started. We've got a great episode for you guys.

All right, so we will be doing Contact, not the space movie. Do you know there's a movie name Contact. Yes, I think it's Jody Foster Johnny Depp, but I'm not sure it is. It is Jody Foster for sure. I don't know about Johnny Depp, but it is for sure Jody Foster. And Katia talks about it all the time.

It's like a joke about her on her podcast and also in un all the time they're making Contact jokes, and like, really, I just don't know if it's like Matthew McConney, Matthew mconnay. I don't know if it's like a movie that's so bad it's good, or it's like actually a good movie that people overlooked. Like I really can't tell the vibe from what they're talking about, but they reference Contact an insane amount of times on that.

Shohnny Depp was in the Astronaut's Wife. That's the space of it all. But I don't even think it's about outer space. Yeah, like I think it's he comes back, but clea Duval friend of the Pod, isn't it.

I have not seen any of these movies. Let me see what the contact? What is it even about?

Doctor Ellie Arroway, after years of searching, finds conclusive radio proof of extraterrestrial intelligence sending plans for a mysterious machine. Okay, great, very nineties. Tom Scarett, another friend of the Pod. It's really crazy. He can't get away from the Friends of

You know what I mean? Yes, Like I'm like, ah, this of course this is gonna happen, but it hadn't before. Like this is where it all it all went down.

So it starts off, We're in a bustling subway, blonde business lady on the phone and oh my god, it's Nicole Sullivan and she's in bangs and you know, she's holding a coffee and she's talking about great prices. She does lose the call right as the train comes and the phone is a full antenna, like she grabbed it from the kitchen wall.

Phone it just like with her, so like, I'm just like this, you guys know, this is one of my most haunting episodes. But also I love it because I love her.

I think she's great, She's very good, and she made me and my family laugh for years and now it will be the opposite. And so, you know, the train is moderately packed. We get shots of everyone's faces, and then they pull out and they're on the f train and then uh oh, someone comes in and he has a box cutter, and this man grabs Nicole, pushes her against the middle like middle train door area, and does

So that's really graphic, just very graphic. And then you see people notice and not do anything to help, and yeah, that's fucked up and crazy. And so I thought about this a lot because everyone's just watching it happen. But the box cutter does change everything because what if you do get involved and then the box cutter cuts this person's deck, Like, at what point do you get attacked. Well,

So yeah, people are noticing sitting watching her get viciously raped and then he runs out at the next stop. She crumbles slowly to the floor in shock. She's breathing heavy. And of course we're in the credits old school baby, I feel like there was a more what is it a Sepia like, yeah, yes, there was like a brown

Because that's not a reason it haunted me because the Sea was my train, I know.

But I they pulled out and showed a thing of the F so I am confused, But Anyway, so we have Curly cue Michelle Hurd Season one Marishka. Suspenders are popping on Kragan and basically this dude is like three seconds boom gone. And this has happened seven times in six months, which sucks. So they all go to work Munch slash Monique slash Michelle. They are walking and working. Munch is in his feelings because it's his wedding anniversary, and so she asks which one and he says exactly.

Lol.

So they meet some uniform Munch's Munch in this episode like he's the lead detective.

It seems it seems like I'm in this episode. And then a reporter is there as well.

So anyways, they get to the train, there's uniform cops and a reporter is there. They hate him, but he's like, no, I'm helping. We're on Spring Street. It's paused the train. Cops want to to start the train again, but our people want to investigate since there was a rape. We have Georgi aka Wellie Yang and he is the CSU tech here on the seam on the scene, not a seam, and he has like some you know, sassy banter with mine.

You know.

I always like hearing the stories of the opposite of that, like I was gonna be there on nine to eleven, but I decided not to fly, you know, like, oh, I know.

Like so many stories like that of people I've heard, like, oh, my friend's dad was late for a meeting that day and missed nine to eleven, Like my friend decided to take his call from home, like all kinds of shit like that. It's crazy.

Yeah, I lighting doors, Oh yeah, I like that better versus oh, this terrible thing happened. Yeah, so that sucks, but she has a messy bonn and a gray zippy hoodie, you know, home comfortable, amazing view. She curls up on a chair as the detectives tell her it's not her FM. She's like, yeah, I know, so she's got she's got attitude.

And I do enjoy that.

And they try, you know, I'm glad the detectives are doing their job, and I'm glad.

She's like, shut the fuck up. So then they try to get scoop. She got on it. Hoyt.

I hate it, sketch her criminal corn, like the worst, the worst.

Wait stop ever you say Hoyit skirmer Horn or Hoyd Schirmerhorn, I like hate it. I never want to say it out loud. I truly just go like hoy Like, I know I used to babysit a kid, don't.

I'm also never there, like I'm never really there, so I you know, I think it's my the ace in Brooklyn. So but that's like the only time I've ever I don't fuck around with Hoyts Schmemermorn.

I hate it.

So she was taking it up to the fiftieth Street and at the station she stop for a latte. She did not see him before the attack, and you know, this is kind of a common thing too, but she's, you know, she's okay with it, but also realizing that she did just stand still and what the fuck? Like all that kickboxing for nothing, and you know, but it happened so fast she couldn't even believe it was happening. And while Stable's trying to ask questions, he's sneezing, he's wet,

What is it in a trip? Yeah? Fuck her? Oh yeah, well, I mean they don't do her, They don't do her any favors in the in the TV series where Sarah Paulson plays her like they do her no favors. They make her look like a sad fucking bitch. For her, she is right, like why would you fuck over your

But many times, yeah, yeah, so hopefully there's evidence there. But we go to talk to some of the witnesses. A man in a suit said he did watch, so that's cool. Yea truly insane. But the suitman could tell that this guy was white, five ten hooded sweatshirt and like a heavy jacket and it's navy.

Color, and he does some kind of it's a navy peace.

But he does some kind of like navel joke that doesn't go over well, Like he tries to do some like I'm in the Navy, does not land gross gross scringe, and then he says, you know, but the guy had dirty pants and strip streaks, and then he remember being like, oh yeah, because I was like, oh, I don't want to be near the paint guy because he might get it on my jacket. Benson hands and Pockets walks towards him and says he's on her and you're worried about your coat.

So that was annoying.

So then now we're with a man in a trench coat, and Jeffries and Munch want like they want to put some decoys out there, some ghosts to look for him, and Jefferies goes, okay, well, then go do that, and then they start like bullying these these transit people too. They're like, where are the cameras, where are the transit cops? What's going on? And this dude gets defensive and is like, hey, yeah, next year we'll have all that.

But even all the computers in the world.

Are not going to stop some guy from sticking his hand up some girl's skirt. And she yells rape greenberg, not fondling, not petting, not unwanted advances, rape on your subway, remember, and he walks away. She does stare him down. Now we have to go talk to another witness. Munched Stable are talking to her to flower shop outdoor situation.

She's not helpful, she.

Didn't hear anything, doesn't remember anything, doesn't want to say anything, like we hate her.

So we leave and it's like, bitch, you did see it all.

We saw you watch her, We saw you watch her getting raped, and now you're pretending you don't know anything. But she has an accent, so maybe she's scared of the cops or something. So we have a team meeting. They're all at the office. Craigan introduces them to doctor Audrey Jackson, a forensic psychologist aka Audrey McDonald Broadway legend. So the Deputy commissioner thought it would be good if she joined the team, and of course they are less than thrilled.

Only Benson says high to her. They fill Daddy.

Craigan in on everything they learned through the day, and the thing is like, and the the only thing they can find consistent with all the victims that is that they were all wearing skirts. And Adre is not impressed and she's like, that's all you got, and stablerd turns around pissed and super dead Pant says, women wearing skirts

Think that's the thing, is like, yeah, she's coming at it from the psychological she's the pre beady Wong, the pre Wong, and they're kind of like, what the fuck are you doing. They're not used to it yet, I guess, and so they're kind of like, you're in our business. But I don't know if they're mean to him at the beginning.

My confusion is like she's only trying to help you guys solve this crime, So like, what's the what's the problem.

Yeah, that's what I don't understand here. He didn't come out until his first Quang's first episode is not until the end of season two with Peak, which we have covered, And I wonder if when he was talking about all the hat pin pricking that they were like shut the fuck up. But like, yeah, I'm figuring it out. You know, yeah,

The head of the guy, you know, like yeah, but they hate and she's like, listen, I'm just here to help, and Craig and Flatley says, we're over the moon. You have come to help so much walks on over to her and goes, okay, doctor lady, tell us what insights you have and she's like, well, he's a dog.

What gets him off is the hunt.

And Monique is like, you make it sound like foreplay, and she's like, yep, to him, it is. And you can't really plant any decoys or anything because you don't have a type. And so I guess we just have to wait till the next crime. And much answers a ringing phone and uh oh, no more waiting needed. The dog found another human fire hydrant, which is language I didn't really need. But they're off to fifty Night the Street and we meet a real New York or wise

There's a nod. They nod, So the wise Guy walks up to them proudly. He's like, yeah, we got to suspect apprehended. This guy looks like a creep.

And this guy's name is Bruce Bond, and well, it's funny the character both the this is this happens twice in this episode where the first name of the character and the actor name are the same, only the last name is different. So Bruce and then later we'll meet us out that is their real name, so oh yeah, yeah, yeah, And so he was officer lou and Fargo if you're thinking about who this man is. And so he in

That doesn't make sense. He stands up.

He doesn't say much, but you know, it does give a better view of the paint. And Benson asked him to take his pants off. He doesn't really want to, but you know he has to. But he starts talking about window displays and that's what he actually works on, is like store windows. But then he says kind of and they're like, what the fuck do you mean by kind of? And why didn't you say anything about any of this? And he's like, well, I'm scared. You know,

Jib what it's like this Episodes from nineteen seventy four. Okay, I so i I've had I've come across this in English before, and our English teachers can like come help us, But like I believe you're supposed to be saying jibes like it's g j I b ees and people have sort of like I thought jibe was like a sailing term. No, actually that's wrong. I don't know, maybe I'm incorrect.

Uh, but like I think it's jibes with like a V, like a victor.

I know, but I've heard people say that doesn't vibe with what I'm talking about. I've heard people say it with a B and like yeah, So like in Britannica, jibe is in the Britannic it says his story didn't jibe with the testimony of other witnesses. What he what he told me doesn't jibe with my experience, So it does mean that. And I think it's based off sailing. It says to cause, because to jive is to send

The jib can also work in this context. I feel like, are we jiving together?

Well, if you look it up, in Britannica, jive is talking jive like street jive is like a slang term like remember from the movie Airplane where it goes, excuse me, miss do you speak jive. It's like a it's like never deceptive or foolish talk and informal language that includes many slang terms, a type of lively music that is especially popular in the early part of the twentieth century. And then to say in the US, an old old

Well, I didn't know jibe with a bee as in boy was even a word. Yeah, but I wonder if it's Craigan's saying it, if it's like a cultural thing that you're like saying the society switches it up all the time, or if it's just the little typer guy who does the closed captioning or woman.

Yeah, that was.

Like the one thing about the forty fifth president when he was just like fireman or woman or whatever, and it's like you could just say firefighter, you fucking illiterate, fuck like the I like, it's just so crazy. So we go talk to an old lady who saw it all and they're circling and the moving and she's like, you know, I saw his hands and in the pocket, and she was leaning on the medal pole and the train jerked and he grabbed the metal pole so we

And I do really love this old lady.

But she says, the woman said nothing, and that's why this old lady was loud about it. She goes for all the times I just stood there and took it enough already. And her name is Sylvia Cotters and she passed in twenty sixteen, but she wasn't three episodes of SVU, so if you'd like to see.

This cutie again.

She's then Blinded from season nine and Quickie from season eleven. I remember what blind it is, but Quickie, I don't remember, just off the top of my head.

But yeah I don't either. Maybe anonymous quiki dot com I'm oh, yeah, that would be amazing, And of course, this woman was on an episode of Sex and the City the Ick Factor, but her IMDb is mostly credits that our old lady, lady, on bench tourist lady and so on, so she has played a lot of ladies.

So we're back in the office and the reporter wants to fuck Benson. He's like, oh, man, I missed you at that crime scene and she's like, oh, I missed you too. There are sparks and they talk Bruce Abbin, you.

Know, he wants scoop Is he the one?

And Benson's like, I don't know, you know, it looks promising, but we'll see. And then it seems like they're going to eat dim sum at eight pm together. Exciting. But before we see that, we go to a bricklayer and he's husky, he's hot, he has really broad shoulders and he's the guy that like pushed Bruce off the woman and got into the altercation. And he's like, I put I did a Nelson on her, and Jeffreys goes half for full and he goes full and he's like, how

And she keeps saying, nothing happen.

And amazing actress Dina Pearlman, and she was actually in another SVU episode Pure and that's what Martin short from season six. If you remember, yes, and if you remember that, you must remember that she is the woman from Sex and the City that in the money episode with Carrie and Charlotte goes to like melt down her engagement ring and this woman wants to, you know, turn her shit into bagette and they start melting the diamonds and she gets very very upset. And so she's the diamond woman

On the subway.

Munch and Jeffreys are there and she's like, listen, you got to watch out on the subway.

You read a line, you scan the car.

You read a line, you scan the car, and you mind your own business, which is what that lady should have done.

She's like, there was no rape.

There wasn't even a flashing situation, which actually did happen to me two weeks ago, and it's always gross, and I wish I had a subit. I wish I had a Mustang and lived in the suburbs, and Munch goes, Amen. So we're back, and now it's Craigan and Audra. They are fighting. She's like, he didn't rape her, and Craigan goes,

And he goes, that's not my problem.

Season one Kragan, Yeah, he goes, what you think I should pick up each of these women and she's like, yeah, that's exactly what I think. If their anxiety goes up on transit and that's how they get around, you don't want them stressed during the lineup, do you. And he finally is like, yeah, yeah, you're right, you're right. You know, well, we'll make sure to get these IDs and make sure they go as smooth as possible.

So Bruce and a bunch of shlubs are in a lineup.

Woman after one woman says nope, nope, nope, nope, nope. One bleach lady is pissed, and she goes, I guess I'll stay taking cabs, and the other is stressed, but you know, you know, Audre is touching her shoulder, and one woman with curls is crazed and she's like, it's number two, no, number four, yes, no, I don't know, and then she's crying. She is stressed. It is sad, she says. She sees parts of him everywhere, every man on the street. She doesn't see him in there, but

We go to blackout. So now there's a lawyer woman. We've never seen her in our lives. Again, I don't know, I don't know her. And Craigan and Audra are the what do we do now?

And Audre's gonna bully him to admit to the fondling because he knows he's guilty. And she goes in their guns blazing because just approved to this whole department that she's good at her job. Because even when she's like, I think he'll do this in that Kraigan's.

Like, okay, bitch, you know, like he is not.

He's not trusting of her until the lawyer tries to give attitude and she tells him to shut up. She lets Bruce know that they are not going to charge him for the rapes because they know he didn't do it, and he's very surprised that they even believed him. Then she asks if he likes riding the subways. He goes, yes, The motion rocks you side to side, front to back, and it's soothing.

The lawyer jumps out of his skin. What is this babbel?

And she's like, I'm trying to make him feel better, and he says he says, that's my job, and she goes, no, your job is to get him a lesser charge of fondling. Bruce stutters out his life story. He's a geek from South Dakota. He's an artist. He came to New York. It was his dream, but he doesn't know what happened. Everything just evaporated. He got drunk and he went to a porno place where they like dance behind the window, and the next thing he knew he was against the

Love that.

So they smile and they are now making out on the couch obsessed. We see a radiator, we see some candle six and honestly, it's like a girl vertical blind.

But she wants to hook up.

We've never seen Benson this horny. But he can't stop bringing up sex crimes. And he's like, do you like to have sex with your eyes closed? And she's like, no, I like to have sex with my white eyes wide open, baby. And so there's more kissing and he keeps trying to talk, and she keeps wanting to hook up and for him to stop bringing up the rape case. And then while wrapped around like he's wrapped around her from the back, he goes, let's pretend I'm the guy from the subway.

And he's like, Wow, it's wild.

This reporter seemed to get right inside the head of this rapist, like he got it straight from the horse's mouth. She's like, fuck him and his imagination. He was at my apartment and on his way out, I turned my back for a fucking second. And Craigan goes, never turn your back on a reporter. She feels really bad and is like, believe me, I won't. He asks if she wants him to handle and she goes, oh no, don't worry,

Car being dropped off? Like what's going on?

And he says, well, policy has lost ticket, pays Max and he's lying. Munches get like, we all know he's lying. Much knows he's lying. So we gotta we gotta get to the truth. And Jeffries is digging in the little box where do they work in the little box? What do they call that little box?

Whatever? Their little parking box.

That's where that's where Jeffries is digging around, and she finds that the car was picked up a couple hours ago. So Munch is like, oh, so the policy has lost ticket, you keep the maximum. He doesn't want to get fired, so he tells us exactly who this person from the car is.

So he goes, this guy always parks here, white.

Skinny, pointy nose, a couple of cars, van or a truck, but all from the same place, Dual's painting contractors. So we head on over to Duels and we talked to a painter and white overalls being classic as hell, you know, like he looks like he paints, he's carrying stuff, like he's busy at the detectives, he has a flannel, he's got it going on. And so he tells Jefferys in Munch that only one white guy works with them, so that's easy, and that's sal Avelino played by sal Viscuso, and.

He stays working.

His first credit is the nineteen seventies and he did like a bunch of episodes of mash so really exciting. And one credit that really caught my eye was he's the voice of the Reservoir Dogs video game, which I didn't even know that it existed, and it probably is really violent, Like do you just saw his ear off, like, I.

Don't my video great question. Oh yeah, it's Cops.

It's basically a cops shoot him up game from two thousand and six. This is so funny. I wonder if it did well, Maybe that'll be my thing. I'll play video games from movies like I bet that could get get me excited. I mean, the graphics seem worse than two thousand and six, but maybe I don't. Maybe two

He's like, I'm gonna fire him one of these days.

And they're like, well, is it the same job, same time, type of place, and he goes, no, no, no, it's different jobs all over the city, different places.

It just depends on the errands that come in.

But like even recently, he took a lunch break a few days ago and that lasted all afternoon. And I don't think it's a drinking problem. They suggest he's a drunk. He's like, no, I'm a drunk. Something else is up with these this guy. But Sally is working, so you know. They point to his pointy nose. They point to him. His nose fits the description. He's covered in paint. This is perfect. So they bring his ass in. Munch makes fun of him.

They're like, oh great, you only have twelve dollars in his pockets. What a great big fortune.

And he goes, I'm just a house painter, and Munch's like, yeah, yeah, so was Hitler and who was also an impotent schlub who needed violence to get it up. It's like, you're coming on Strong, Strong. There's no games and confessions here. But he has two driver's licenses, which is weird. One he's like, oh yeah, yeah, I found it. I just didn't have time to return it. It's someone named Sindra Lawnstine and she is an organ donor. They ask where he finds a He goes, I don't know, a street,

Wherever he's been going.

But when they go to get more information from fucking trenchy over there, the fucking system is frozen and the transit like he's just like, oh, technology, what are you gonna do? Munch is getting impatient, so rowdy, and the dude is like, what do you want from me? And Munch goes to sit on the third rail and walks away. So now the painter Sal has a nice young attorney who's ready to rumble. She says he can't do the lineup right now, and Craigan goes, what are you talking about?

Like she no one respects her.

Basically, Craigan assumes it's because he's like too tired or something, because he goes, well, he can rest between IDs, we're doing it, and then she goes, well, fine, but he needs to be first in line, and they're like okay, number one, Sal, way to go.

And it's just.

So my confusion is like why she was like he can't do the lineup today?

That's like what I wasn't the lawyer, Like, wasn't the lawyer like my client is tired? I thought there was a line like that where the guy was like, I'm defending my dirtbag client and he needs a nap, Like I thought there was something like that.

No, because that's what Craigan responds. He's like, he can rest between IDs. But then she's like demands he's going to be first in line. And it seems like a like an agent like negotiating where it's like.

Yeah, fine, if you don't use that for that position. Yeah, but if she books this pilot, she's out for this and you have to let her out. Yeah. It's seemed very like okay, so.

Like you were already ready with another request, like it just seems wild, but he allows it. Craigan doesn't care, so you know, it's his lucky number one and he gets to walk out first. And before they even all come out, Nicole Sullivan knows it's number one and it's quick and they're like, well, no, you have to wait, and she goes, I don't give a shit, I know it's number one. And then she asked jeffries, now what and they say, well, we'll hit you up when it's

She's like fuck.

So they talk to the suit man in the office and it's so it's Kragan's office as much as they're Jeffreys. They're all mad at this guy and he's like, it happens so quick, and they're like, yeah, you should have been faster, loser. So then he then goes super sexist immediately. Oh you know there are six women in there. You know, they all start yacking at once. And this is another fucking weird word choice, like yaking to me is puking. And then I know about yapping, but I didn't know yaking.

Well, what about the song that goes yackety yack, don't talk back? Whoa yeah, yaking as barf, Like is a late or that's a more that's a more recent thing. There's a lot of shit on the show that is like, you know, it started in ninety nine. A lot of the writers are older. Like there's something else in the in the next episode we're gonna do that's like an old definition of something that I had to look up and was like, oh, they're using like the old definition

Screamed loud above them, like you could have shoved her out, Like there's just so much But why why were you even outside to make sure that she yeah, go in, grab her scarf for her?

So I supposed to be in so that he could stop them from comparing notes and talking to each other. Why can't they all be in separate rooms like to avoid any kind of tainting. I don't know, it's very confusing, but I remember this scene all the time. I always think about this scene because I'm like, oh yeah, like when someone's there for an ID, you can't let them

I know we're at court arguing just this, the two white women brunette lawyers.

They're fighting to the judge.

Who's Peter Francis James playing Judge Kevin Beck.

And we've seen him before. I think he's one of the sexier judges.

And he has been in five episodes all season one and two, which is wild because I really he's made an impression on me.

I would say, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, this guy had I had to refresh, but yeah, I.

Know, I don't watch season one or two that often, and it was just a sunder for season two, So I am like, why am I so obsessed with him?

Yeah? I don't know. He's also a theater boy. Man. He definitely a man. Oh and he in twenty two twenty three was in the revival of Funny Girl, Oh Cool with the Liah Michelle of this podcast Liah Michelle.

Yeah, sexy judge and you know, listen, does this exchange during the lineup?

Fuck up the trial or not? What will he decide? And uh? Oh case dismissed.

Munch and Jeffreys look at each other in despair and that we remember what this is called the gallows, the galley, the audience court. Oh we figured this out. Yeah, I think it's.

Galley, the gallery.

We've said Gali, but I think gallery, gallery gallery.

I knew it was something.

So they're back at the office and Stabler's leaning back in a chair just like fuck. So without an idea, it could just be considered consensual? What And then it's like, what do you mean can said sex with a stranger in a subway holding a box cutter? On what fucking planet? They're like, what planet is this judge on? And then Benson goes Planet of the Apes and this man is not white? Yeah, it is not a good it's crazy.

I don't think we meant to catch Benson an a racist moment, but I think but we did in by accident. Whether it's a microaggression or not, it is definitely not a good look. No, it's really bad. I'm glad you also caught that. I was like, am I gonna just pretend that didn't happen? We love Marushka, she didn't do anything. No, we have to say something. But I think she also is referring to just like it's a man who doesn't care about what happens to women, you know. But it's bad word choice.

Yeah, And so then Kraigan just wants to keep it moving. He's like, Okay, so what about the ID we found seize your los Lonstein.

Maybe that's our ticket.

She hasn't returned their calls though, and the DMV has not sent her a new idea yet. And that was seven months ago. All of her credit card numbers, though, were changed at that time, so something occurred seven months ago. Her address changed, credit card numbers changed, and she could be one of the victims and not attainted witness. Towards the end of this meeting, Craigan realizes, wait, Jeffries isn't here, what the fuck? And Munch goes, Oh, she's sitting on

There's something about season one that is not as clear than when they had their formulas, Like it is just more I think they're still working it out.

Yeah, like I get more confused, I would say in the earlier because there was another episode we did recently where there was like a whole scene where we both were like, I have no idea.

What just yeah, what is happening here? Yeah, So as I think it's like trying to set up red herrings and get people to think move their thoughts to a different thing, and like it's just something you're like, why is that even here? Especially if you're used to like the more efficient like current or middle seasons, you know where it's like down to a science.

Yeah, so we're at just like a random man and Stabler and Munch asks if he knows Sedra, and he does. She's the cleaning she's a cleaning lady with the Mona Lisa smile. But she works at thirty fourth Street subway station,

So Benson goes down to.

The reporter and she's pissed and he's like, whatever, you didn't let me read it, so your boss needs to chill out, and she goes, yeah, yeah, you found it with your reporter instincts. But guess what, my captain isn't gonna care about the details, so it looks like I screwed up. And he says, you're being too hard on yourself, and she tells him to save it and throws a file on his desk. It's a cold case. You want

Who the hell is this?

And Benson says, Oh, it's a guy who had a rich fantasy life who couldn't stop a man who uses women without the slightest tinge of regret. He gets what's happening now and shuts the file and shifts in a seat, and she says, a man like you, A man like you, And then all of his coworkers are staring at him.

You get an idea of why Benson doesn't date much. They set it up real quick at the beginning.

Well, because I forgot about this guy in this episode because in the future, when she talks about dying, she says, it's like the people that want to recreate the file, like they're two turned on like that. I bet there's people that are just looking for an SVU detective or something or some sort.

Of well, and she's also like only dating ever guys that are just conveniently right there falling in love with the city. Yeah, Cassidy, this reporter guy, it'll randomly be FBI guys, or like that Da in the Bronx from the episode we did with Michael Beach. You know, it's like always working.

That what happens if you all you do is work, everyone you date will be from work.

Yeah, it's all just like people that fall in love with her on the job. And then she's like, it's too close to work. Yeah.

And then one abuser from her past, you know, the quin guy. But okay, okay, So Munch and Sailor go to chat with Cedra.

They show her the ID. Oh my god, she's so happy to have it back.

They ask if she lost in She goes, yeah, on the subway, you know, some guy bumped into me. And then Munch clocks her pregnant belly immediately and she sits at Craigan's desk and she puts her feet up. So they meet her at the train station. They bring her into the police station and she's chilling.

They're all being.

Really really sweet to her, and then she goes, hey, we're all just civil servants here. And she goes, oh please, I'm a janitor on the subway and she giggles, and Sailor goes, tough job, and she's doing eight or nine weeks, and Sablor starts babbling about his wife's pregnancy and timing and he smiles at her, and basically she's not getting it. But they all think the rapist is the father of her baby. Since that happened seven months ago, she's doing eight to nine weeks, it's closer to ten months.

Blah blah blah.

You know, he took the wallet and she's like, yeah, I'm so happy you got it back. But so I think she's naive, I'm not really sure, or she's trying to keep it secret.

She wants this baby, I don't get I feel as though they are trying to portray her as possibly a little bit not all there, you know.

So then Kragan bends down to her level and goes, so, what kind of bump was it? And she's like it was an accident, you know, the car was crowded and I was off duty. And he's like, well, were we wearing a dress? She goes, oh, yeah, But again she is not understanding what's happening. She asks whether asking her all these questions, and Munch bends down to the ground

You knocked her up.

He's like what he like, cannot believe this, and then Cidra sits out there with Stabler and he's confused because he had a cold for a week and then she touched him and now it's gone, so she's a witch burn her, and then they bring sal out and they actually chocked, like this is like running into each other. That's become classic SVU. But because it's season one, like,

They said you were number eight.

I was wondering what happened because I knew it when we when I did you, something beautiful could happen, and that you would get pregnant and have my baby. When I get out, we will be together, okay, a family. Jeffreys carries him out as he says, my baby, my baby. Stablor joins in, dragging his ass out, and then Cadra like cries into Munsha's chest and that stick wolf baby.

It is kind of weird that like I had Audra McDonald on staff, and they didn't have her do like a super quick work up on what's going on with Cidra. Like she's like she's avoiding, like she basically has mentally blocked out this trauma that happened to her and is like channeling everything into like excitement about being pregnant. And I don't know, like that would have been like to me, a interesting little thing to do about, like, oh, yeah,

Like I mean, I listened to podcasts, but like a few here and there, Like I just I can't listen that much to people, and I'm such a reality whore, so like I try to follow the reality stuff and like sometimes I'm just like okay, okay, shut then.

And I don't feel that you guys, I mind. You so entertaining. That's like, oh my god, an honor, because I like grew up a huge Mad TV fan, like flipping the channels back between Fox and like Fox and SNL, you know, NBC, so that I can watch SNL mad TV. But I always loved mad TV because you guys did all these parodies and I wasn't really I was like political comedy wasn't really my thing then, and I was like,

Well, so you know you were a fan of Law and Order going in when you got the SVU of at All, what were your thoughts?

It was season one.

I was so obsessed and I was doing a show I was working in New York. I grew up in New York, but I was doing a show for like five six months in New York TV show and I was like, I told my manager. I was like agent, I was like, if there's any way that could be, just to call, And like two weeks later, he's a given audition go in and I was like, oh my, and it was my dream come true.

I couldn't believe I got to do it.

I was like, it was the greatest it was the greatest get of a job I've ever had my left.

I was like, so you went to Chelsea Peers. Yeah, you did it all. You did it all.

The apartment we shot in overlooking, Yeah, I mean, who has that apart.

This woman, this woman that you play is like this boss bitch, stock trading, coffee swilling New York. And I love her. When the detectives are like, it's not your fall and your character goes yeah, I know, And I loved that. I love anybody that throws it back at Maloney for sure. But what it was, it's it's an intense role. It was an intense scene the cold open.

And I'll tell you what was fascinating is that we were it was the guy playing the guy was was very method and really dark and freaked me out.

And they had like a fake box cutter.

But it didn't feel great on the neck, like you know it like it was like it was a it was a really hard scene to shoot in the subway car like it was just weird and dark.

And Dick Wolf came to set, no where.

To God came to set all of a sudden, was standing on the platform because they you know, they owned like a platform right now.

Yeah, we didn't know that they own a platform.

They owned like a defunct trains station somewhere, like two things that aren't a stops anymore for regular people. They own those two stops, and they own a train that just can go back and forth between the Wow, that's how they that's why they can do subway trains. And so dick Wolf came down to that platform, and I was like stick Wolf and he said, and I don't want to.

Pull him, because like God, if I don't don't want Dick Wolf that at me.

But he said something to the likes of, this is the darkest thing we've ever done.

Yeah. I was like, oh, He's like this is, uh, this is And I was like, oh, all right, well here we go. All right, take tick four, let's go.

It was he was like genuinely like Jesus, well, I mean, and it's a graph, yes, I was.

There were no illusions to stuff. Sometimes there's an allusion to a crime, but this was like the full time, very graphic. And then the horror of everyone watching and not doing anything.

I mean, it's Karen.

We always do a thing where some of the episodes are the most haunting to us or have haunted us for years, where we just and this is Kara's number one where she just thinks.

It has always been my mother haunting episode because I lived in New York for eleven years and I rode the subway multiple times a day, and I remember sometimes I would just be zoning out and I would just remember that scene and be like, oh my god, like and I really like, I fainted on the subway one time, and all these people came and helped me, Like a woman came off another train to give me an apple,

You can't believe, like there's no possible way that someone could be that taken by surprise and that like threatened with well, of course you get a knife to your throat, You're not gonna do any sad movements. You're just gonna stay still, Yeah, and that no one understand.

Oh, it's horrible, no, And you're like pressed up and like we can see your breath. I mean half the time on the episodes, we don't even see the attack. They just find a victim a body or whatever, you know, Like we don't even see it half the time. And then this one is like cold open right to it like this, it's like it's it's jarring. So you're part of a long line of people that have played of comedians who have played serious roles on the show, right, So,

Yeah, well like the fact that Maloney Maloney had had a cold and like yeah, yeah, and I got to react to like ew you be like ugh, like yeah, why are you in my apartment with your so I mean that's you that you're like, I'm speaking to your point.

That's exactly it Like there is some levity, yes, exactly. And I think it's like such a genius thing to employ because of course, all of these people that I just named, including you, are like trained actors who can aren't just like doing sketches all the time, you know, like can do a myriad of things. But it's it's so I'm like, so, I mean maybe because we're also comedians. I just love watching comics do their thing because I actually I so believed everything that like the pain that

Because you guys are both comedians, you like, and I'm not trying to like pat the comedian world on the back but a little bit. But I am like, one comedy can translate to drama because comedy is pain, you know, wrapped in a bow and stuck with like a you know, a googly eyed face on it. Like that's sort of what comedy is. And it doesn't necessarily work in reverse. Right, We've seen a lot of examples, Like there's amazing dramatic actors that like, you're like, I guess.

It was funny, Like your voice goes like I think I think funny like it's not. It doesn't necessarily translate the other way.

And I think that's something that a lot of people don't know, is that most good comedians can really solidly do some good drama.

Yeah, someone recently told me that's a lot of because when you're doing comedy, you have to listen and react to things on the fly. And so I think it like a little more present or able to kind of roll with it.

And I also think it's for me on Mad TV. And I wasn't a comedian going and like, I never studied the groundlings.

I never did.

I had a sketch show with my friends just because you know, back then you would do the showcases like that was the big thing. You'd get your friends together and do a showcase. And back then, casting directors they don't do anything anymore.

But back then, back then they have TikTok. They have TikTok the right. Yeah, they're looking at people.

So they they would show up and they you know, if they liked you, they'd send you to their boss and you know things. It worked like that. So I did a sketch show like that, but I wasn't a comedian at all. And uh, I realized quickly when on MED to be like really, part of the key is not being afraid to look like a dope, look like and like look stupid and crazy and like, oh she's trying too hard.

Then you're doing it right, you know. I mean there's a lot of that to it.

That a lot of uh, you know, good looking people aren't willing to do understandably understandably, like they've got a different thing they have to sell.

But if you're willing to look stupid, that's a huge leg up in the comedy world. Totally. Yeah.

I don't know if it's a pet pee for you, but when celebrities do interviews and they'll be like, oh my god, she is the funniest person alive, and it's like, there's no fucking way, Like I can't imagine Blake Lively is just like crushing it at dinner.

But wait, I feel like we also need to clarify that the reason we know that you're a Law and Order fan before we even asked you that in this interview is because you sent us a video of you and Michael McDonald. Also one of my mad TV obsessions, you guys doing this sketch I guess that you did for REDTV where you where you're like trying to get the attention of the casting directors for Law and Order and you're doing all of these characters. Like I took the screenshot.

What I loved the most was like the sexual innuendo Emmy, Like that was so good because Melinda is so s like they are all throughout franchises on Dexter two, like all the science people are always.

Like saucy medical, saucy medical examiner.

See, and then they say something they say and then they say something at the end that's like, oh, oh my god, like jarring, like their belly button was found inside their eyeball. Oh my god, oh my god, Like they're sort of doing bits and then they say something horrible and like something A lot of sexuals to be like, oh you found semen where Oh my god. Yeah, yeah, jarring, the whole thing, Uh, just total tangent.

Like another fun fact quote unquote when I did the episode is I was dating this guy in LA who I kind of knew wasn't into me, but I was like, he really should be, Like I couldn't get why he wasn't. He was like this, he was like the set photographer on Ma TIV. And I was like, I mean, he's taking my picture all the time. All he pays attention to me. And so we dated like a little bit and I went to New York to do this show and he broke up with me the night before I

I can't relieve it worked out well.

Whenever I think of that, I think of the Katy Perry documentary with Russell Brand texting breaking up their marriage right before she was about to perform for like two hundred thousand people in Brazil, and you know, you don't go tour in South America often, and she's just like bawling and having to just go perform. And so when I heard night before, I'm like, that's a sociopia, Like why are you trying to ruin someone's stuff?

Yeah, but I'm not sure. I'm not sure he was aware. I don't think he I don't think he considered.

But even over text it's like wait till wait till you get back, Like I don't know, yeah, take me to coffee view of it all.

Wait, So, since you've done all the franchises, who are your favorite detectives?

This is why I'm so bad?

Well, I love Jesse, Yeah, I mean Lenny, Like you know, I mean here, I Here's the thing about Chris Maloney is he's the nicest human being in the world. Like I saw him at a dinner party. I don't know, years ago, but like, you know, not as long as the show. And I saw him at the dinner party and he was like hey, and I was like, I did

He can't. It's like hard to describe how nice this is.

Like when you're a comedian and you're and you know, you can kind of act, but like other people don't.

And he all night.

Long, he would just refer to us as he would refer to me as a peer. Oh he would say, you know, like you know when we when we're out there doing our thing, and you know when like as actors we need to.

Like he he just.

Included me in his club, which he didn't need to, like, he's Chris Maloney and he did all night and I just left there thinking, like, what an incredible person.

So I think also he respects comedy. And I bet you he knew your work and was like, respected you a lot because he loves He left a lot under SVU and ended up doing comedy for a little while. Yeah you know, yeah, yeah, yeah, So but I think that that really story about him. You know, we we

Eh uh No, I know that she my one of my close friends, Krista Crystal Lawrence, uh Bill Lawrence and Crysal Lord.

Today they have a house.

They have a house in Malibu and Brushka has a house in the Hamptons and every and every summer they trade.

They trade for a month.

Oh, which is the rich It's the richest ship. I like every time I think about it, I'm like, just these multi MOLDI millionaires just live in each other's homes for a month.

Yeah, I don't know what about it fascinates me.

Well, well, because they're still doing apartments swapping like us.

You know, it's like it's like.

I Aaron BB like, do they do they have a closet you can't go in an airbby.

There's a management closet that says do not enter enter are the rules like take out the garbage before you? Like, I don't know how it were. If you guys could can mash and Peter hermit, that would be great.

And let's be honest, they both they both have staff, right does the staff traveling with does it travel or do they stay in place?

I don't know. I would if you've got cook you like, I would bet that they stay in place because they know the property. But then like personal assistance go with Okay, That's why I would like the chef's stay because they know the kitchen and they know where to source their their foods and their vegetables and their organic farmers markets and stuff in the area.

And then is it like below deck where they get a list of their likes and just like banguage.

Do they have to check that? Oh below deck, Man Deck. I just did a giant like. It took me a month and a half, which isn't that long.

Honestly, I did a giant rewatch of the Real Housewives of Orange County and I just finished this week. I feel free seventeen eighteen seasons?

Can I can? I? Okay, go ahead, because I have a real serious question as it was brutal.

It was brutal, It wasn't even joy at the They are the most vile people I've ever seen in my life.

But what is the question.

That so I've never I'd never seen a Real Housewives episode in my life. My friend Lisa Shannon is the executive producer of New York.

And so Ling. Oh, okay, she's she's brilliant.

She single handedly got watch your Chops the clothing design. Yeah, she like single handedly got her to say.

She's amazing.

But uh so, during pandemic, I'd never seen an episode of any I was like, Lisa weird chatting.

She's in my book.

We're at a book club and we're chatting, and she's like, you've never seen And I'm like, I love reality, but just I don't know if that's for me. She's like, I'm going to send you one episode of of of Housewives of New York. It's not aired yet. You can't show it to anyone.

You just have to watch it. And it was season Oh god, I'm gonna get the season eleven. It's okay, just tell us what happens.

Well know, episode four, episode four, it's when Leah gets naked and runs around the pool with That was the first and I was like, and I Then I was like, and now I'm so I started New York beginning because I didn't want to. I did the same thing with vander Pump. I didn't even know about the show until I heard scandabal. I said, no one tell me anything. I binge watched that from the beginning. Uh so, also, here's here's my quest, Atlanta. I did, and by the end,

People crazy because you're just hearing them fight all day for eight out. You're just they're fighting, their fighting, And so then I was out in the world and I was just like, shut up. And then I was like, what the fuck? Like it infiltrated my being in a very I had to leave Atlanta. I actually, I actually was a big fan of Atlanta at the beginning, and I left about halfway through and said, it's too much.

You also do so much animation. Do you ever get like toys or like drawings of the characters you do? Like are the figures?

Let's talk. Let's talk about that for a second, because that's a real issue.

I've done a lot of shows, and it began years ago with Buzz light Year of Star Command, which is like a buzz light Year spin off, and it's buzz Lightyer and Princess Mironova, who like left being a princess to fight in the Space Wars, and they came out with the action figures for all the characters except Princess no Miranva and she.

Was really like the second in command.

And then it happened again and again and every time, and I was like, this is so horrible. And I remember speaking with someone at some event, you know, some con somewhere, and I spoke with the guy who was like in charge of you know, somewhat in charge of the things. I'm like, can I just be honest, dude, it feels very like very anti female power, Like it feels like you only. And his response was, the little girls don't play with tiny action figures like that. They

Also not true because they make them now and now kids play with them all the time, you know exactly, So I just think they hadn't been introduced.

Like the guy was going off these numbers and it was the chicken or the egg, and it was definitely the chicken he was looking at like yeah.

He was like, no, no one likes the chicken. I'm like, but you haven't given them the egg, And it's a horrible no. It makes sense. It's like if you're not giving the girls anything that's going they're going to identify with or representation of any kind, you know, then like they're like, oh, yeah, I guess gi Jo's are for boys and that's it. Like that whole toy cat.

Was so such like like horrible old fashioned thinking and I remember thinking like can that be true?

And now like a Mowana thing and everyone all the girls buy them. So he was wrong. But that's the answer question is.

There's not been a lot, Like I have a couple of figures from like you know, like Tim Possible there was like a you know.

What a happy meal that had she go in it for a little bit, and so I have a few of those.

But but regardless, I've had amazing experiences with animation, Like I I've loved so many of the shows I've done.

Yeah, you've done like a lot of Family Guys too, right, I feel like I always see your name in the credits for Family Guy. I'm a BoJack girl. That's like that was okay, Oh my god, Okay, I have to again, I'm taking up too much. No, this is okay. I have two stories. I have two stories.

Okay, first I'll tell the BoJack Horseman story, which is not really that much story. But they said, hey, Nicole, they're doing this new show called BoJack Horseman.

Uh, what's not Lisa Kudro, But what's the other woman who's the the main woman in it? Alison Amy Sedaris or Alison No, maybe it was She's pretty fairline, but Lisa Kudro is in season two, she's an owl for a few episodes. It was the first scene. It was the first episode, and it was the main female. Forget if it was.

Uh, I forget which part it was any or the part Okay anyway, So they said they're not they're not able to make the table ree Can you read for them, which I've done at other things, like you just go to a table read and you read their part. And we did the reading and I remember walking out and I was walking it with like a friend of mine who was writing, and I said.

What the fuck.

Are they out of their minds? This is the stupidest thing. I have ever. I was so judgmentle next thing, I know, the larger following huge it. I was like, and I'm that's always for me. I never can guess what's gonna like make it and be good. I can.

I have zero radar for that. So that was my dumb BoJack Risman. But here's my Family Guy story.

So what year is it? Two thousand?

Anyway, it's the year before Family Guy and Future I'm gonna come on the air because they came on the air at the same.

So they both came on I think in like ninety eight, honestly, no, no, okay, okay, yeah, because I remember watching them my freshmen year college. Okay, so it's ninety eight.

That super Bowl was in Miami that year, and so Fox back in the day had so much money. I mean, they spent money on us, like they would give you per dms of like five hundred. It was crazy, like if they just ORed money into actors, flew us everywhere.

Fuh.

I recorded an episode and they fired me and they're like it's not the voice isn't working or not. I was like, okay, horrible, Okay. Then they recorded a couple of episodes they called me back. I said, we don't know what we were thinking. We've tried a million other voice. Nothing's as good as you. Please we beg you know, blah blah blah. And I was like, okay, okay, loo, come back. So we came back, recorded those episodes that

That's messing with someone's head. Like, if you didn't want me, don't use me.

So we're watching the clips and both of us, you know, I introduced each other watching it and the future.

It's just just a long story. The Futurama clips were like.

Ten to one time, like Future Ama Da Da Da da, and they were giving family to like ten seconds, and he goes, that's my show, and I'm like, oh, and I go I think, goes, I hate Matt Greening, and I was like.

I hate them too, Hi, what's your name?

And we introduced ourselves and sat next to each other on that bus, just ripping into Futurama, which is of course an amazing show and great and of course Matt magrig is brilliant.

We don't hate him, but like, we were so angry and bitter.

That day on that bus, and we became besties and like hung out all the time after that.

Just our love our hate of Futurama. Love it. I love when hatred brings people together. Yeah, yeah, that is such a funny stories. I can't believe they jerked you around like that.

I know, I guess I can, but yeah, that was myly the only job I've ever been fired from.

And it's hard because like that literally is like a lake house. I couldn't I know. Oh my god, that's like that was a big job to none. It's still the only thing playing on Comedy Central. And by the way, I just really quickly googled it. It was the very beginning of ninety nine, not ninety eight, but I was close.

Oh okay, great, just for That's what's tough about the bit, Like when you're testing and you have to sign for money that you might make and you sure just like really play off faring and then it's uh that they really like to do that.

And you're hoping, like maybe this is the one show Matt does and it's not going to be funny, and of course it's brilliant and funny.

And oh my god, wait, I want to go back to I'm from Skokye next to instance So Illinois.

That's where the van is from, Skooky from TV from Illinois. That's yes, she literally skoky that's where the mall is and Skooky Illinois. Oh my god.

I just love everyone that goes to Northwest. Lisa somehow escaped any kind of Midwest accent at all.

Like I don't thinks I'm from New York. I think I would watch The Nanny too much as a kid or something like.

I don't.

And I have zero New York accent and totally picked up on the Midwestern And that's much more what I sound like in Midwestern than New York.

I never had the New York accent.

But Northwestern has churned out like some of the best comedy people ever and just performers.

Yeah it's a good school. Yeah, it's a great school. I did not. I was not successful there. I was not popular.

I was not casting a lot of stuff like I would just you know, back then, it was like the cast list was on the wall like you see in movies. It really was like now, I'm sure they get emails, but like back then, everyone looked at the wall to get in the and.

Then do they try to like do they try to like hit you up to come back and like talk to the school and like you know, be involved, And you're like, yeah, you guys. It wasn't actually that great for me, but I had to bet, like you know why, I love it.

I really had the best fucking time, And then I had to make my own things, Like I worked with the student I like, I was like, I'll direct apply it, like I had to make my own reality because I wasn't popular and getting the parts. But it totally trained me for LA. Like when people come out and they're like they're the star of their musical and wherever town and they come out to LA and it's hard, I'm like, oh shit, no is always the answer.

Yeah, I mean when you get a yes, I mean I already knew that coming out that is so good. That's like really great. I feel like for me that was commercial commercial auditions. I would just do a million commercial auditions and go, well, I'm never going to get any of this and then just move on with my day. And it really helped me set the mindset of forgetting about it. As soon as you audition, can I speak to that?

So I I'm like that with audition auditions, like I do it and then I forget. People like or my Maner's like that audition for what, I'm like, what was that? I'd like, I don't even remember I did it. A Commercial auditions messed with my head so badly because it was like you get one second to be like this burger's juicier than I thought that's not real. Yeah, but like I was like, I was like, let's come here again,

Like it messed?

Uh?

Or I was going in all the time in New York for commercial auditions, and then like Deborah Wilson from Mad TV would be there. I'd be like, I think she's getting this, you know, like yeah, Like or I'd be like with six girls from Orange is the New Black, and be like, why are we here? Why are the rest of us here?

Like that, Yeah, the waiting room, But don't you kind of miss but don't you kind of miss it now that we don't get them?

Yeah?

I made I made, I made people. I only got a snip it. I truly got maybe a year. I got maybe a year of impersonal auditions in my career, like in New York running around, so you would be.

A little longer, but you were still in like this is horrible stage. No, I love it. I love celeb stuff.

I love Hollywood, Like it's why I wanted to do everything so I loved seeing famous people in the rooms or running around, and I felt so cool going to my acting coach and walking to the audition, like I romanticized so much.

So I really yeah, me too.

I loved it, and I'm like it was so much fun. I met all my good friends in those rooms and now I don't see them.

And yeah, probably my big embarrassing one was I knew I was bombing. I knew it wasn't going good. So I go cold, we just.

Please stop this, Like, I just this is bad. They're like, no, finish, shit, it's fine. I go okay, but I just this isn't going well.

And then I walked out and Lena Hall was going in after me, and I was like, okay, cool, but is your little uh silver lining. I love that you called yourself out of like this is not We're not going anywhere. I'm embarrassed, like I don't want to I don't want to continue. You don't want this.

I don't want this, Like why are we pretending? Yeah, I'm good enough, But I guess that's how you learn is not doing well.

I love that you did that. Yeah for all this, Uh thanks, any last minute tidbits from your time on SVU twenty four years right, I got so I got so lost on the SVU.

I would just say, like my so the takeaways was the dick wolf moment washd just really okay, here's here's here's the story and it's doesn't baby. So we're shooting the thing and there now they're shooting through the window, right reverse shots. So yeah, it's my face against the little subway haunting. Yes, hunting.

And the director had to call me over and he did it privately, which was really kind.

He's like, hey, he goes, can you not open your eyes so wide when you're getting attacked? Attacked? Can you not when your eyes so what? It kind of comes across funny.

Like I was like that.

I was like, I say, okay, okay. He's like, it's a little loose sill ball when your eyes are really wide. And I mean that's the weirdest and best and humiliating note of all time.

And I loved it. I loved it. I did not open as much. That is so funny, because yeah, I think of you as like doing these characters with like big like you know, yes, your eyes are a big part of your comedy persona.

And I love that.

He's like, we need to tone that down. We don't. It's not about that, It's not about the eyes today.

Yes, what wait, is there anything that's coming out soon that you would want people to know about?

Yeah?

Projects, Sex Lives of College Girls. Oh, I small a small part in two episodes. Uh, but I love that part. I love that character, and I love that show. I think the girls are so like I just find them so charming on screen. I think it's such a a really cute and lovely show. So I always promote it.

Oh, amazing, Great, it's on Max Max ex Slice of College Girls on Max. Amazing.

Timothy Shallomey's sister is I play the mother. She's the lead, and I play the mother to hers.

She's delight Ooh I didn't even know Timothy Shalomey had a sister in the biz. That's fun. Have a great rest of your day. We so appreciate you taking the time. This was the best.

This has been a bless I knew it was going to be super fun. I was so excited about it. I knew and it was as good as I wanted it. Wow, ninety minutes. We had to cap that at ninety minutes. And we truly could have talked to her for longer.

For so much longer. But also she just likes what we like. Yeah, so much matching interests. That's nice, so like we like. I'd been thinking ever since we talked to her about how she's like. And I don't know if Casey kept this in the interview or not, but how she was like, I don't think my kids like me, and I was like, oh no, oh, is that my future? My kids were gonna like me? I mean, she's obviously

I am holding back because I know I'm just gonna be upset by it's religion and chauvinism. Like it's just two things that rilly me in a way that I like, can't. I know, I'm gonna see this young younger because.

I can't. But I just think you might like how it's not all of them following it. You know, like half of them are kind of like what. Half of them are like we drink, you know, half of them are like we do. I think the other half are like cheersing with cokes and wine glasses. I do want to try all the Mormon drinks.

I do want to have a Doctor Pepper with coconut cream and a lot you know, I want to Yeah, yeah, yeah, I.

Would like to have a little fun. Excuse me, do you have a Mormon drink? Flight?

You know what?

I just remember? And I have a potato tiketo in my fridge. Ooh, I love a potato tiqito. Any Mexican foods where you just shoved some potato in there?

Yeah.

I went after Union Hall last night and I did have a Leachi margarita. Not as good as a Leachi martini. I'll be honest, it was disgusting. Doesn't match. But anyway back to our you know what, now that we're on the fucking post, we could talk about the NYPD. Fucking watch if you get groped, Watch if you actually need help. These motherfuckers. Someone jumped the turnstile. It's a two dollars ninety cent ticket. Four people shot. The NYPD shot four people on a train platform.

Pew pew, pew. Like it's fucking guns and robbers. Why are you trying to shoot people for like pretty much any kind of robbery, Like, I don't know, I just don't think anybody's like stuff is worth someone dying. No, get the cops out of our fucking subways.

Stop harassing the churoh women, stop fucking shooting civilians. And why don't you get rapists, Why don't you start fucking arresting each other?

You lose it actually, like like perfectly attaches to this episode with because of like the subway stuff, because yeah, you would immediately think, oh, this crime in the subway, get the police in there, but like, look what they're fucking doing Jesus, that story's crazy and did one person die or one person's in critical condition?

I know that I unfortunately am a headline only woman, and I have no details. No, no, I do read the news for our show. I am very involved.

Yeah yeah, yeah, you just don't know the answer to that question. And that's absolutely acceptable. I'm fine, that's fine. I just guilty. Yeah, I mean for the post mortem, I was gonna be like, well, I think give New Yorkers more of a benefit of the doubt, because I do think that they like help. Like I talked, I talked about how I fainted in the subway in New York and a lot of people helped me, you know.

No, And there's a younger comic at the cellar and she was about to take an hour long train ride home and I was like, oh, yeah, damn, Like it's two in the morning and you're just something alone on the eat Like fuck. I feel lucky that I can take a cheap car, yes, because those lay ones are expensive. They add up, it's hard, so I feel really lucky to be close by.

I had a friend who used to fall asleep on the train all the time, and she'd be like, it's not that big of a deal. I'm only one stop pass. If I fall asleep, I'll just walk. And I'm like, no, it's not about missing your stop. Like stop falling asleep on the train gonna get fucking kidnapped or like a alted Like I don't know, but everybody in every city that you're on, you know, just we I'm always telling everybody,

It's actually so funny because I put it in the shared album. But I took a video of the sprinkler situation and everyone running chaos and you are in a white dress in the middle of it, all on your phone looking at it hard.

I felt safe. I felt safe. We were running, going wild and you it was it was. It was very stoned when that happened, and I was like, I know that's what made you pass. And then I think I was just looking at my phone, going, wait, what's going on with the sprinkler? Like I just I tried to smoke a little weed to like be like food, and then it was it's always backfires.

I need to not But now we found a tarantula. Oh my god, I did a terrible thing, actually that I will confess on this. So my friend has like a giant phobia of frogs. It is an irrational fear.

She knows it. It is bad.

Yes, one night during beer pong, we saw a frog tiny one, Yeah, tiny were you there was that when you saw the frog? Yeah? And I yelled at every and I go, don't you fucking tell her? No one can tell her about the frog, like it'll ruin everything. So while we're at all coved getting drunk, I remember the frog. And since the vacation is done, I go, oh, I do have something to reveal. Biggest mistake of my life. I ruined everything. The phobia is deeper than I could

She goes, do not do this.

And it's like the biggest mistake I've ever made in my life because it's the one place, she says, she always feels free and safe and isn't always checking for frogs. And I go, are you always checking for frogs?

And she is, oh my god.

It's so it's such a phobia that she is always thinking about it and I can't believe it that I took the one safe haven away from her by revealing the frog. What I thought was safe because we were just like drunk out of springs And she goes, well, it's just gonna be like everywhere else. I'm always on edge, I'm always circling. She's like lifeguard looking for a frog at all times.

Oh my god, maybe we need to figure out some kind of like exposure therapy for her. And they started, and then they started reminiscing of all the times she's hat like at restaurants, like always looking under tables, and I'm like, I didn't know it ran this deep. I'm the worst friend ever. No, you were telling her about something that happened a forty twenty four hours earlier. I mean, who could know it went so deep? But like now I guess we know.

This is what my mom always says, I talk too much. I need to shut my mouth, like stop telling people's stuff. And that would have been perfect, but I was like so fucked up like that. It just like hit me and I go, oh, this will be a funny thing. And then it was like I'll never feel relaxed again. She goes, it was the only place I can relax.

God, oh my god.

But then other people saw a snake on the property. I'm glad I didn't see that. That would have really fucked me up, but not that I would never relax again.

Poor thing. We need to look into like an exposure therapy for her. Maybe there's like someone that can like slowly introduce her to like a nice frog, and we can like figure out some way that she can get over it.

I don't know she's been strong before because her friend Cassidy got married and she was in the wedding and there were frogs at the pond and it was hard for her. Oh yeah, because she had to wear he oh thong heels, thong kitten.

Heels like flip flop kitten heels. Yikes, that's a choice, okay, and that's also a lot of toe exposed for frog touching. Anyway, let's move on. This is gonna be the longest episode of our podcast history. Uh, what would is it? Okay?

If I move on?

Yeah, I was gonna say I was like shaking crickets out of my clothes with no thought in my brain.

Yeah, no thought in or out. Yeah, I mean I had I had crickets in my house.

But I also like, I hate getting nauseous from drugs and hating too much. Like I've just been very like more not into it. But I was like, I just want to eat the drugs to be included, but not feel anything.

And that is what happened was I hate mallia mushrooms and just floated and was like waiting for people to start talking again. I'm like, when is solitary hour over? Okay, Let's move on to our what would Sister Peg do? Our weekly segment where we direct you towards an organization a website.

I do want to interrupt again, but it is funny to see all the couple and everyone different because you and one other couple were the reading couples, but you were real books and they were kindle books, but like, yeah, you guys were the readers of the of that.

I just am trying to get through this book because I'm so late for book club every month and I'm just reading at the last minute, and then I'm one of the only people that's ever finished the book. But I was like, oh, on this trip, I'll get some chance to read and like actually get ahead in the book and not be like the day before book club fucking freaking out and binge reading. But yes, I love a I actually have. Oh no, that's not true. I've read a book on my kindle fire, but I don't

We're doing PC from season eleven, episode thirteen.

Get with it jive turkeys? Is that a thing? I think? So? Thank you guys so much for listening. As always, we love all of you. Come see us on tour, follow us on Instagram, the usual shit. We'll see you guys next week.

Bye, E Done Done, That's Messed Up as an Exactly Right production.

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Mixer John Bradley and our guest booker Patrick Cottner, and to Henry Kaperski for our theme song and Carly Jean Andrews for our artwork. Thank you to our executive producers Georgia Hardstart, Karen Kilgarriff, Daniel Kramer, and everybody at Exactly Right Media. Dun Dun