This week, Lindy is dying :/ Bye girl!!! But the show must go on! So this week we are releasing a very special episode. An abridged semi-exclusive limited release Very Special Episode previously only heard on our Patreon! That’s right. It’s 2 Shrill 2 Furious: Portland Drift —our rewatch series of Shrill. Specifically, we’re talking about the Pool Party episode written by the incredible Samantha Irby. And you’re gonna lose it, but we are joined by NONE OTHER than Sam Irby HERSELF. We’re talking ...
May 08, 2025•59 min•Season 3Ep. 18
We have so many new delights to share with you. First off, we’re GORGEOUS?? Lindy washes her bangs and Meagan is absolutely slathered in rouge. Tune into our socials to see the evidence of this glow-up/looks-maxxing, and let us know if it’s worth all the effort @textmebackpod on IG. And we also share a BFF endorsement/reunion story that means everything to us!! This is your invitation to send every episode of Text Me Back to your bestie. Plus, there are some major updates to our Whatcha Wa...
May 01, 2025•1 hr 8 min•Season 3Ep. 17
HOUSTON WE HAVE A PROBLEM! GET 👏US 👏OUTTA HERE 👏 Last week dire wolves, this week…Gayle King is in space? You might think that all of the world’s problems have been solved if we’re spending time doing this nonsense–but actually, nope! Believe it or not things are actually worse than ever! The BBWs are losing their minds in real time, but that’s okay because Magic Mind is here to tether them gently to Earth. In other news! Barry has tragically been re-coned and Lindy and Meagan are...
Apr 24, 2025•1 hr 2 min•Season 3Ep. 16
Hello faithful Text Me Backolytes and welcome new listeners (we’re sorry in advance to newbies! You could not have chosen a more wild starting place, but you’ll catch on fast!). Today Lindy and Meagan kick off with a humble but necessary installment of Department of Corrections: Peter Edition. Apparently one of these colonizing yahoos from last week did, in fact, step foot in Washington State–but don’t worry, we’ve decided to make that one a bonus Q so you can still graduate 8th grade. But the q...
Apr 17, 2025•55 min•Season 3Ep. 15
If you thought Lindy’s train adventure was an unhinged delight YOU ARE IN FOR A TREAT. This week it’s Meagan who hits the dusty trail on a trek from Washington, (District of Columbia) to Washington (State). Meagan bravely Dale Coopers her whole ass off with that tiny influencer mic. Along the way she endures a mid-flight beef with her evil auntie doppelganger, being bullied by her brother, and a fight for her life over a Caesar salad. And not to brag but some pretty good stuff happens along the ...
Apr 10, 2025•1 hr 19 min•Season 3Ep. 14
This week, Lindy and Meagan submit a heartfelt notes app apology. We are so sorry to all the snakes and worms and devoted listeners out there. To help mend some of these shattered fences, we bring you not just one…but THREE Snakes of the Week 🐍🐍🐍!!! Thank you to a loyal Husband listener Peter for submitting an iconic snake anecdote! And next, we are joined by our Pete Hegseth Correspondent Rafil! The emojis and memes are FLYING between Rafil, Jeffrey Goldberg, Pete Hegseth, Vice Preside...
Apr 03, 2025•1 hr 2 min•Season 3Ep. 13
Lindy is running on the fumes of borrowed youth, and Meagan is one (1) glass of wine deep. This is the opposite of a Magic Mind episode where we’re cool collected cucumbers and we’re calling it Tipsy Back Podcast ! Lindy brings tidings from the So True Hype House, where Lindy desperately tries to impress her young comedy crushes, starts a group chat she may or may not be kicked out of, and endures a self-imposed spiral of rarely-seen proportions. Next…we asked and you delivered, friends! G...
Mar 27, 2025•1 hr 16 min•Season 3Ep. 12
Welcome to another classic episode of Text Me Back, where Lindy and Meagan, two self-appointed kings, tackle the most pressing issues of our time. See agenda below: FIRST AGENDA ITEM: Buggies. Meagan bullies a neighbor by sending another round of live bugs to a stranger’s building. And friends…there is potentially a third round of bugs en route. The only real downside is that this is accidental bullying and Meagan may have to leave the D.C. area :/ NEXT UP: We’re checking in on Lindy’s Rebuildin...
Mar 20, 2025•54 min•Season 3Ep. 11
This week we continue a-milkin’ that New York cow! Um, excuse us? We are walking here. Meagan and Lindy make a brave break from their cozy hotel room into the NYC winter night to watch Drag Race at a local bar/mystery tent and meet THE Thorgy Thor camping out in there! Somebody go back in time, call our elder care facility, and tell them to bring us a knit blanket! Have you ever experienced a winter chill? DM us Y/N @textmebackpod And next, we add a sexy twist to our age-old Segment P.U.B.E.S. T...
Mar 13, 2025•1 hr 2 min•Season 3Ep. 10
Unearthed from their On Air Fest goodie bags, Lindy and Meagan discover little teensy influencer microphones! And if you know how jazzed one host in particular gets about the media board, you can guess what this means–absolute unhinged chaos aka a cross country FIELD TRIP! 🚂 But before Lindy shares her unfiltered reporting from her truly epic train ride from DC to Seattle, Lindy and Meagan recap their On Air Fest experiences, walking away with one important question: What in the sweet hell happ...
Mar 06, 2025•56 min•Season 3Ep. 9
Today, Lindy and Meagan are recording this episode in their most natural state: lying down.That’s right–these two sleepy gals are broadcasting from a very fancy Big Fig mattress at On Air Fest in Brooklyn, NYC aka DA BIG APPLE. And they’re not alone! They’re in bed with the biggest grifter in the biz, a legendary podcast king and professional menace…Ronald Young Jr. Big Ron gives us the scoop on New York's hottest restaurants (a sexy little local joint~Aplé-beis~), gives us many a glad tiding, a...
Feb 27, 2025•46 min•Season 3Ep. 8
Deep-cut audio lore, chaotic jingles, and possibly altering the course of America—just another exceedingly normal episode of Text Me Back. 🚨🚨Hot Take Alert 🚨🚨Meagan defends nepo babies? If you’re into blazing hot takes from topics that were top of mind in 2014, you are in for a real treat today. And a new segment means a call for a new theme song! Zuma Rossdale Stefani please we need your help!!!! And Lindy held the future of America in her DMs?? GRIMES!! CALL US GIRL! (703) 829-0003. And sp...
Feb 20, 2025•1 hr 11 min•Season 3Ep. 7
Ass oil, Dongexploder, and The Puppies! If those words and phrases make sense to you, you’ve been perusing the Text Me Back Biki and are OBSESSED with us! This week, these two supermodels do the impossible: record a podcast. Lindy goes absolutely feral on the mediaboard, testing the limits of both podcasting and her friendship with Meagan. Meagan has an important mouth update. Lindy is discriminated against AND/OR is herself the perpetrator? Tell us what you think happened in that coffee s...
Feb 13, 2025•1 hr 1 min•Season 3Ep. 6
Lots of news to get into today! First up, we start off with DOG THOUGHTS that includes an absolutely iconic voicemail from a very good husband listener named Gerald. Yes, Gerald, this time we ARE talking about you! If YOU want to tell us more about bull penis use-cases, call the Best Friend Party Phone at (703) 829-0003. And we have a new segment: The Reddit Report! What on Eru’s green Middle Earth is friggin HAPPENING around here??? Is it so hard to all agree that literal Nazis are bad an...
Feb 06, 2025•59 min•Season 3Ep. 5
This week we welcome Rafil Kroll-Zaidi , our in-house private eye and bear oil enthusiast, who gives us some pretty hot gossip in this week’s Segment P.U.B.E.S. We’re learning who these dangerous yahoos are stocking Trump’s cabinet, and this week’s featured player is: -An alumnus from America’s most expensive clown college, Princeton* -A geography novice and a military fangirl -A former Fox & Friends host -A bona fide dick-shooter That’s right, it’s P.U.B.E of the week Peter Hegseth! Good lu...
Jan 30, 2025•1 hr 9 min•Season 3Ep. 4
A real embarrassment of riches over here on the Text Me Back side of the internet. First, we pay tribute to David Lynch, which bridges poetically into our next phase of entertainment: the Trump administration’s trailblazing focus on Making Hollywood Great Again with washed up losers who failed out of Hollywood! If art isn’t dead already, these freakin’ ding dongs will make sure it’s killed for good. But you know what? We also have good news. Our segment Normal News brings us wonderful news about...
Jan 23, 2025•1 hr 15 min•Season 3Ep. 3
We’re back again! And maybe this episode is slightly more normal than last week’s (complimentary)? We’re back on our Whatcha Watchin’ nonsense, and we’re talking Later Daters, The Ultimatum, Dateline, Sports (Beyoncé), and last and absolutely least: ReelShorts (??). Have you seen Later Daters?? TELL US YOUR THOUGHTS at [email protected] or DM us on Instagram. Are you getting served ReelShorts slop? Tell Meagan EVERYTHING via the Best Friend Party Phone at (703) 829-0003. Bonus point...
Jan 16, 2025•1 hr 2 min•Season 3Ep. 2
It may be the dead of winter, but in our hearts the clammy buds of spring are bursting–and so are Lindy and Meagan!—with squeaky-clean teeth, resolutions, and creamed corn. This week, they dive into their post-holiday recap, revisit their 2024 affirmations, and commit to their new 2025 goals (including being Even Better Better Businesswomen!!). Plus, the Text Me Backolytes share their own resolutions! We are eating fruit, sewing, cooking, and enriching our pets’ lives. We are going to the ...
Jan 09, 2025•1 hr 6 min•Season 3Ep. 1
No one’s going hungry this week with your beloved TMBTL of the Dog hosts on the case. That’s right, Lindy and Meagan have teamed up once again with Luke and Andrew of Too Beautiful to Live to bring you another episode that will take you on several journeys involving puppies in witness protection, Meagan’s little buggies, Luke’s homicidal tendencies, and Andrew’s connection to a famous TMB earworm involving dogs, shit, and peach pits. In other words, a perfectly normal crossover event hosted by f...
Nov 29, 2024•1 hr 14 min•Season 2Ep. 34
BBW Updates! Corny Tyme! A nostalgic game! Lindy’s delirious brush with VH1 fame! This episode has it all! In this segment-stacked episode, Lindy and Meagan share BBW updates you won’t wanna miss (peep our links below). Listen, we wish we had all the land, energy, and fertilizer in the world to start a commune in the woods with many many donkeys! We wish we could find an abandoned boxcar and ride the rails into the sunset forever and ever! But realistically, the resistance looks more like stayin...
Nov 21, 2024•1 hr 6 min•Season 2Ep. 33
Who’s ready to laugh? 🫠 Last week a Bad Thing happened. But never fear! This week of healing started off strong with Lindy and Meagan heading to Portland for another sensational live show at the Patricia Reser Center for the Arts ! And you simply cannot pull off a live comedy show without visiting the Pacific Northwest’s own Red Robin! YUM! Where are our Bonsai Burger heads at? And it just keeps getting better! Lindy and Meagan are joined onstage by Emmy-award winning comedian and w...
Nov 14, 2024•1 hr 39 min•Season 2Ep. 32
Oh how sweet and innocent we were when we recorded this ep one whole week before Election Day! Oh to be doubled up on Zoloft on this day! When we recorded this episode, we envisioned a world where it might be possible to ever feel comfortable and cozy again. That’s why we brought you our annual Cozy Recs, complete with eggnog (or milk-based alternatives), oversized hoodies, and the famous cozy game you know and love: SMDDRFFAD! Does that help?? Is coziness possible? In any event, we hope you enj...
Nov 07, 2024•1 hr 10 min•Season 2Ep. 31
Happy Halloween! This week, Lindy and Meagan accidentally pull off a spook-filled episode. An eerie hamlet full of demigods! Warty pumpkins! Creepy crusties and the horrors and potions of age! Keanu Reeves-vampire-time-traveler-boyfriend! Oh, I dunno and THE PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION?? 😱 What could be scarier? Coming off the breathtaking success of our live show at the Seattle Py00blic Library, we’re back with tidings, P.U.B.E.S., and MAGA numerology (PLEASE hug your teenage sons!!). And we r...
Oct 31, 2024•1 hr 5 min•Season 2Ep. 30
This week, we’re LIVE from the Seattle Public Library! We have THREE special guests who we put to the test with a series of silly little games as well as high stakes political questions. But first, tidings! And headlining this round of tidings is sharing the winner of our tattoo contest!!! Special shoutout to those of you who submitted this winning idea -- there were five of you! -- we’ll reach out soon to make sure you get your prize. Be sure to follow us on Instagram @textmebackpod to check ou...
Oct 24, 2024•1 hr 7 min•Season 2Ep. 29
This week, Lindy and Meagan come bearing two important pieces of news. First up, is a long-awaited update on Kevin’s nads. And equally important to report: Lindy and Meagan make an iron-clad commitment. A promise to NOT laugh at the biffs, blunders, and incomprehensible nonsense spewing from Donald Trump. We’re calling it the No-Giggle Pledge, and the terms include donating to the Harris-Walz campaign each time they fail to hold to this democracy-enforcing covenant. Kamala, get prepared to add s...
Oct 17, 2024•1 hr 14 min•Season 2Ep. 28
This week Lindy and Meagan are 42% less rude than last week! We decompress after last week’s call outs and the Titan Submersible implosion recap (where the mean % points really racked up) and get back to our earnest, nerdy roots. Lindy spends American dollars on a personalized Hydro Flask. Kevin graduates from puppy school, so naturally we assign Breakfast Club archetypes to the rest of the pupporinos (Kevin is either the Janitor or Judd Nelson, who could really say). But the crowning jewe...
Oct 10, 2024•1 hr 3 min•Season 2Ep. 27
If Lindy and Meagan had a podcast back in June 2023, this episode would have been soooo timely. But they didn’t. So they’re covering the most important story of that year here and now and that is…the implosion of the Titan submersible. BUT BEFORE WE DIVE INTO THAT, we’re back on our endless, increasingly appalling, and all-encompassing RFK, Jr. beat, which brings us swiftly to Segment P.U.B.E.S. Somehow, this RFK, Jr. has led us on a collision course with a cohort of assholes who bullied L...
Oct 03, 2024•1 hr 20 min•Season 2Ep. 26
This week, Meagan returns from her near-death appendix betrayal! And she comes bearing many a tale from those hallowed hospital wings. Tales of: a murderous vestigial organ on the loose, sexy doctors cutting free what no longer serves, a spooky Jack Nicholson moment, and (dot dot dot) a murder mystery??? And while Lindy awaits to hear the fate of an extremely ill Meagan, she sustains an injury from playing a video game too hard. If you’ve played Cult of the Lamb, you can probably relate. S...
Sep 26, 2024•1 hr 13 min•Season 2Ep. 25
In this week’s episode, Meagan’s appendix decides to take this “I Can Fix Her” segment to a whole new level and makes an unexpected break for it. And as a result, 50% of our hosts are in the hospital and our episode is a little shorter than usual! When the appendix decides to say *bye girl 💅* we have to respect it, but luckily we had a pre-recorded segment brought to you by Magic Mind, an elixir that helps make brain from brainestrone. We also talk about a couple other products on our radar and...
Sep 19, 2024•30 min•Season 2Ep. 24
This just in: Lindy and Meagan are normal people bringing you the normalest news! They are wearing their normal uniforms (a bra), bringing you the normalest ideas (putting Trump into an ethical Magneto-style plexiglass prison-box), and sharing normal news (moon updates, booger reporting, and Hvaldimir the beluga spy whale). The AP has the Best Friend Party Line on their speed dial and you can too! Drop us a voicemail or text us at (703) 829-0003. If you are a beluga spy whale, we want to h...
Sep 12, 2024•40 min•Season 2Ep. 23
