Boys, we did it. We're back. 4:30 AM start me, Calvin, Jordy Clonic, healthy, Patrick's brother. I've been sitting on that for 12 hours. Back up a road, called in to do Ireland. AM we talk show just on the way back opposite. I'm in the area. I do that. I do it every time we come back from clinic. Guilty. And we made it here. Can't tell some Mickey Barton, my guest. Can't tell some. Yeah, Clonic healthy show last night in the bars. Folk bars that was called.
The bars folk bar. That's how they pronounce it. The bar don't you Bars folk part I wouldn't call. The best tour show I've ever known my life, really. Yeah, this Your Terror Show Tour shows seem to be getting better every time It's good that happens. You mind the other way I go. It started well, right? Much like sex starts with a great promise, yeah, and ends with me common on a tissue me own, which is 7 I.
Don't know why I said that. I never said some, but like, I didn't mean to what you would say. I was going to be like just seven guys sitting watching. Yeah. But I don't. And I have no money at the end of it, ladies. Gentlemen, my my guest today is, is Mickey Barton. Good in tag. You said you're retired as well. I'm knackered. Why are you tired? You're not sleeping. No, I've been sleeping. I'm all sober and sleeping. Fucking meditate and all. I think it's just this. You meditate?
Nah, just thinking about drinking. I just look at fucking bottles of whiskey and go. Yeah, no, I think I've just. This has been the first week in a long time. I've been gigging every night of the week. Yeah. So we were, we did the student unions together. And then I was in my heartfelt last night and I'm just like I'm. How was that terrace? Terrace will tell great we fucking room if you get a chance to go down, just great we club. But a packed line up.
Really fun to gig with Leanne Mccurry because Leanne Mccurry being being a gay woman will point out hot girls in the audience and it doesn't feel as sexist to objective high women whenever she's done at first. Yeah, yeah. Well, the whole not one there. I love being your friend. Bring a dog and that's a fella. They should bring a dog. No should bring a dog. Dog came to the pod. Really affect. Yeah, well, he's terrified waiting for the dogs. Yeah.
Proper frail dogs like. It's only a wee dog. I have met her dog. It's only we fucking yeah. She said Willie. I suppose that's probably is there. But you sure? You sure? Any almost sharks? I'm scared of crocodiles. Yeah, crocodiles, snakes, spiders. I'm scared of hippos if I'm in the wild. Yeah, yeah, I'm scared of cats, but only because I'm allergic. I quite like them, but I know that my eyes will swell up and get all sneezy.
So yeah, I don't like the way. I don't like the way they just brandish their bum holes around. So like cattle just walk around your house? That's our toilet. No. You ever seen a catwalk around a house? Tail up. Just like my dot. I think it's. Rude. We dot cotton. Yeah, just we balloon. That was closer to Rocky. That was my grandma's cat. You haven't seen it? Oh no. That's was so black. Oh my God. Welcome to blind date. That's Miss Peggy didn't did. You used to watch any soaps?
I used to fucking love this. I used to love so I used to. I remember it like, you get home from school, right? I got home before the rest of the family. Quick wank and then EastEnders. So you'd watch. It was an Australian show. It was on before Home and Away. Quick wink. So it's like a wee suburb. I've got down a quick wink to get that back and spam. But you would watch. I never watched Home and Away. It wasn't into it, no. But you would start with Neighbours, right? Right.
You watch Neighbours have your tea. Yep, right. Maybe catch a bit of news around. I know what's going on the world. See what Laser's reporting on like. Go upstairs, pretend to your homework. You don't do your homework, and then it's like fucking fucking EastEnders kicks in. Yeah, I watched Hollyoaks for a bit, but I would do that. I would do. I loved Hollywood. Hollywood after Dark. We talked about that before.
It was, yeah, I remember, I remember that one episode of Hollyoaks After Dark was the moment I realised I might have a small Willy. Because you remember there was one of the wrong holidays and there was a silhouette, one of the guys getting a boner. But it was massive. I really like my shadow. I don't. I put a bedside lamp on. Yeah, yeah. And there's no way that was his. No, fuck, I hope not. Yeah, just the blood that would eat faint.
I am I I I was like AI, like green chill biker Grove. Can another? Fucking green chill as well, yeah. With them I do Hollyoaks and I do probably was quite into Emerdale. You know, I like the Amity. I'd stick I'm ready alone when Patty cans it wasn't. I would stick it on the third rank of the day and then umm, I want to joke, but I was really. Annoyed for the 4th. But I love the EastEnders corn industry. You'd watch 171 half 7 right?
But then what I don't didn't like about that time was the soap mags to just tell you what's going to happen. Yeah, true. I. Didn't like it. Yeah, You know, I like the the. Suspense. Yeah. Even like when Dirty Dam was coming back. You knew Dirty Dancing I think is your favourite era of soaps. I was more of what did you call the guy that killed Ashley's wife? Remember the serial killer in? Cornish man, I'm fucking way behind. But you remember that. What do you call him?
Started. Was he nasty, Nick? No, that was Big Brother, the guy. No, there was a. GAIL Platt Nick Cotton No, Nick Cotton was was GAIL Platt's son. He was played by. I'm talking about Doc Cotton, son. Oh, you're talking about standards. I'm talking about Coronation Street, right. So there was the guy who was he was married to Gale Platt. He killed Ashley's wife. He killed Ashley. You killed me, wife, man. She's covered it, so she's dead.
And remember, because it was real, it was kind of like, this is fucking terrifying, violent, but also kind of funny because he had to wear a shovel or something. Yeah, but that, that was a fucking great area when he going to get caught because he was killing efforts and you couldn't move to Cornish St for pension. Curly Watts. Don't ever call me out again. I've shaved them. But yeah, I wouldn't be in this up now at all like it for.
You, I couldn't tell you. Who's but I got big into them for a. While yeah but soap stars used to be mega stars. You're right. Do you mean they used to be fucking super Widget Widget Widget Ridge? Oh, is it Ian Bale? I keep thinking of GAIL Platt's son. Who memory brought that song right? Adam Ricketts. Adam Ricketts, That's the guy I was thinking of. Yeah, I copied his haircut for a while. Remember that was the curtains were big. Blonde curtains. Yeah. And you know who was a wee sexy
boy? Jack Ryder from. Jack Ryder was a very sexy. Boy he marry Kim Marsh. He did marry Kim Marsh and she was a sexy, she was a sexy, she was a sexy. So she was a sexy pop star at the time. Can we some sexy soap babes? Yeah, absolutely. Can I give you one? Yeah. And then I'm just banging out because I'm so tired for the last light part of the week and I'm just bombing. You and fight him off. I'm not sure the sound of your balls. Yeah, umm, sorry. So she was in Emmerdale, She had
red hair. She was in her like late 40s. Diane, she was a very sexy So what? About the blonde Australian lady from Emmerdale I. Don't remember her? She's a barmaid, was she? Who was also in home and away? She was in home and away back in the day in Australia. Right blonde Australia Australia Emmerdale Try that. Yep, that's the very one. Emily Simmons, yes. Absolute terrible babe. Good day. Who else? She's look at her. Mercedes from Hollyoaks was
like, was it for a few years? Then she started getting all that weird plastic surgery when she was getting too skinny. And did she get like a hip graft or something? Her hip got her hip shaved down. Really, there was weird kind of popular things that get done. Big more We MO. Big MO. Yeah, all the big MO. Gary Oldman sister. Yeah, not much cats. Later all over. Yeah, the leopard print. Yeah, total. Snake Alfie.
Who else? There was, there was, but there was, there was some very fucking handsome soap man. Oh, do you know? What I mean, I'll throw it out there, right? Grant Mitchell back in the day, yeah. Daddy, Yeah. Yeah. Mega Daddy. Yeah. Jimmy, Frank Butcher. That's go for it. Frank Butcher could talk into bed. Like, yeah, he could talk into the wording title. Yeah. Oh Mickey, every for up your pet. Just me off. Mick. He what? Yeah, he would.
Get my apartment into my ass. He had like a Larry Lamb kind of thing. Larry Lamb, also a daddy. He was. He was in a super. He's finished for a while. Did he not play? That's right. Danny Diary, his wife. Peggy's husband. You didn't watch it for long enough, it got a bit crazy. Also Bart. Bob's Windsor. Oh yeah. Yeah, absolute. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There was a couple of wheels. Oh, baby, baby, baby.
DeMarco was a fucking stunner. Was in, was in EastEnders for like 10 years, never cleared his throat. Yeah, yeah. It just was you. Yeah. How you doing? How you doing Mike? Broadcast is Bebe was proper set to be we. Beard. No, we tiny. Thing Beard. Yeah, I love that. He was very cute. Who was the guy that it was? Nick. Nick Cotton. Was he? He was sexy boy. When he or was he? No, he was the dodgy one. What did you call the guy? Big fucking Jack, Dude. Who was Cat's son?
There was A and B's brother and EastEnders 3 and B's illegitimate brother or something. Oh, nice. Big movie star. Yeah, yeah, right, right. I know who you mean. He was, yeah. Yeah. The chop bars open so people want to fire in sexy suit men and women. Just just I third, third from the top down. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, what a honk. Yeah, yeah. Billy Mitchell. Billy Mitchell in a way. I mean, he had a certain charisma, but him? Would you? Genuine question, right?
Would you be in a soap? No, you wouldn't. Be. I don't know. I don't know. For a year, no stand up being a SOAP pretty pretty good role, well paid. But they're like, I'm equal, don't you? Don't stop. I 100% yeah, you would do it. Yeah. Don't have to write your own jokes for a while. You're planning a fruit vendor. At the mean, you can't call my these, but John a banana. Guess where it is. Yeah, that'd be good. Crack, wasn't it? Not for me do.
You think the shooting schedule be too much? Yeah, learning the lines and all. And I tell the money isn't what it used to. Be no, no. Do you know? What I mean? No, B was probably the last, Yeah, the last star like. My ideal job though on anything would be gone through from friends. Yeah, because he was in the background pretending to make tea. Yes, and at one point was on Underground episode. You serious? Yeah, and he's probably not even making the tea. Well, not anymore. He's dead.
No, he's not. He is dead, gone through, died a couple years ago. You're choking me. Swear to God. Of what? I think it was cancer. It's hard to make fun of that. Ah, God, we're through a wiggle these iPods. Yeah, and I just found out. Don't there's gone. Don't we have a question please? Quickly. A few suggestions. Peter Barlow and Steve McDonald, somehow both lotharios. Steve McDonald. Steve McDonald, she's. Not saying they were cute, but he's not the. Numbers, but Peter Bart Peter
Peter Barlow's gots on the bed. Which ones? Peter Barlow? Bring, bring, bring. We look. He's he's. What do you call Cam Barlow's son? He's troll. He's tortured like he's troubled. But. Oh, here I 100. Percent I look at. He looks like he was in the SAS. He's one. I'm just thinking sexy out middle. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. He dares get sucked off. Ken Barton was there. Yep, Yep. Oh, definitely. We might Baldwin too. He's a. Remember he was going well, he shot the one that might know he
he rather he had the underwear. Alec Baldwin. Yeah, no. Oh yeah, sorry. A. Few people saying Jason Grimshaw. Ah, forget about it. Remember, his was his brother in Emmerdale. A little bit 10, yeah, Logan. He was. And then the girl he went out with as well. Very cute. Is she the girl? Oh the played Gill Platts daughter? Yeah, yes. Was his brother going with a girl in Emmerdale who went on Big Brother? I remember she caused the whole stink. She's like, he just hit me, yeah.
And forgot that it was like on TV, they're all being filmed. That was mad. Remember that, Roxanne? Palette. Roxanne Palette. Roxanne partner that. Name is talking shade in the daily room. Roxanne is spoofing Yeah umm Dan has with a different tickets out of Sup town here. So Lauren says on Monday, Andrew and David chatting about what's next for comedians doing different events. What about a Taskmaster style show? Would that be? I've never seen Taskmaster in my
life. I've never seen in my life, Yeah. I don't know what it is. Is it literally just? Absurd tasks that you have to try and complete. And every is it in front of a live audience? No, not the TV show. Here's absurd task we complete Comedians Boxing 3. Nobody else wants to do it. So we talked about. Well, you weren't here when we talked about the. No, I didn't mention it to make you earlier, but what? What do you think of the? Cardboard fights. The Patreon special behind closed doors.
Fight Club. I think I'll be good. Greg, you like it? Just for the Yeah. Because it needs to be something different on this. We just pick names out of a hat. No, we just go fuck it. You're fighting him. You're fighting her. Imagine Heather Anderson beaten the fucker. The last name I would want, yeah. But yeah, something like that might be interesting. Yeah, it can be fun. You know, like just like in a proper. Would that be fully illegal though? No. It's no different to what we did.
Yeah. But imagine Dead in Holy Trinity or something if they were cool with it, you know? Yeah, No, no audience just it's quiet when you're. Boxing just the sign of fat head in the. Box. That'll be fun, that. Would be fun, actually. Yeah, we do that. You can still make money for charity, couldn't we still But you'd. Be more. I think you'd be. I'd be more nervous with no crowd. Yeah, that. No, because we've done it with a crowd. Yeah, like just the silence of it.
I driving yourself just down to gym and like getting your wee bag out of the boat and being like we're doing this in 10 minutes. Here and up here and just breathing. Like. Is there anything else you'd like to do like about like because we talked about doing them blind date about like getting patrons and me hosting like blind date? That's feels we but sort of Epstein even that just auction comedians off the blind people. No, not commit. That could be a lot of fun if the.
The single ones were just like, right? No, of like, yeah, it's like 3 people trying to get a bit with the comedian. I never thought about that. Yeah. I thought it was just going to be everyday pedrones. But like, imagine Willy T is the is the contestant and then we just get single comedians. Oh, that could be really good. It could be funny like. Willy, Willy. Willy who? Butler hit us. Yeah, that's tell Butler. We've planned that. You'll be watching.
Won't be. Do you know what he's sermon like? These all you can see everything. You can see everything. He's on a lot of. He's on a lot of. I call him the dinghy because he's crossed a lot of streams. He has his eye. He has his eye on a lot of live streams, right? You see Butler. 'S 4 phones in the car. Butler's house. Right now it looks like he's. He's a mall cop in a big Westfield shopping centre. Yeah, he's got all the screens and he's got the feet up. We don't know, on his chest.
And what were you going to? He hasn't said what? What should we tell him? What? You mean, what were you going to? Say whatever we say, that's what we're going to do is we've decided we're going to comedians blinded, right, But we're going to get the single comedians right to. I think you'd be the deities. I think he would do it. Say we booked it, No, we booked it today, right? And he has to do it. He has to do it, but I think he would do it. I think he's probably already
deal at half the. Is he a horny boy? I think he's horny, yeah. I noticed last night he has a tiny backpack with him. With gigs. Yeah. There couldn't be anything else, Julie. Take a comforter. It's it's like a backpack. He would put a raincoat in, but he's no raincoat. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, that's just something. There's not no jokes without
nothing special. So maybe we should try and figure out because he's coming on at 1:00, he'd be with us from 1:00 to 2:00 After we take a break at one year we should try and find out what's in his backpack. But what if we spook him? What if we say what, What do you keep in that backpack? And he's like oh I need need a piss here. And after 5 minutes we were done and the the windows wide open and the winds just coming in gone. Never see him.
Again, maybe it's a backpack, it's a Mary Poppins, there's loads of stuff in it. Imagine it's pretty good organising. Imagine if it was like, do you ever remember Men in Black when there's like, the wee Ant in the guy's brain, like controlling it? Yeah, imagine the real Butler. Like he's just a vessel and in there there's just a way. Just a way alien we alien, but it looks like Butler. It's like it's like a smaller
version of him. Yeah, I think it's a good chance Donald Trump, that's what is going on with him. You think so? I think he's crying from the Ninja Turtles and his belly as we fucking. Wall. Racist alien Andrew was on the part of the start of the week and. Yeah, that's not good into Trump. I saw some of the comments. I don't play the. Game I know, I know Andrew spooked. You want to say he just moves in the shadows.
He only goes out at night at the moment, just moves like honestly like he just he just got through scuttles, scuttles about the shadows and the B roads. Like this man is is keeping a low profile. Yeah, yeah. It's a very divisive time. Paul does. I don't think we should. I don't know. I'm just like everyone just fucking. There's nothing you can do. You mean? Just let him. Just fucking watch it. Dan has with a questioner, please. Mark says he's off to see Mickey tomorrow night at Queen's
newest. It's a three hour show. Any hints on the support? Dave and Butler. Is it really a three hour show because the Doors. Are doors are sad and shows it. We'll be out of there by 10, half 10. And you're shooting your special. I am David, yes. Main question Comedian to comedian, what are you going to wear? So right, this is an issue you have up and ban we fucking jackets. I thought I'd wear a jacket. So Butler's got the bag for it, if you. Yeah, well, no, not a Mac, but I
bought a cool. We sort of like suede leather kind of jacket, but I think it's the problem. No colour. It's like a greeny brown kind of colour. Hey daddy. The problem is when I wear actual nice clothes, it doesn't look good on me. No. I swear to God that I think I showed you the photo before me in a tuxedo. It looks fucking. I look like a Penguin from Penguin. Yeah, no Penguins. Yeah. So it's I put it on last night. I actually took it out a gig last night as a test drive. Tuxedo.
No, the and then I bought another jacket from Fraser. I went spent money, the good money on and yeah. And then because my arms are so short, it looks like I'm wearing my dad's jacket. So. Right. Because you were saying you're you're hard for measurements and stuff standard. Sizes. Because you have nothing on me. Makes sense. I didn't know I had short arms until we did comedians. Boxing. Yeah. And I was trying to punch people
who couldn't reach them. Yeah. You look like you're doing nothing when you put your arms back into your jumper. Yeah, at all times. Yeah. I look like AT Rex. If you stop moving, I can't see it. Yeah, shame. So yeah, it's very hard to get me because of a big daddy's big belly, skinny legs and wee short arms. As someone once said, I'm built like a genie. Yeah. So nice things don't look nice on me.
No, I swear to God, like if me and you went out shopping and bought the same outfit, you could put a really expensive outfit on someone that looks like you. Nice long elegant limbs, sexy chest. Great ass, right? And people go wow. And then I would put that stuff on and they would go why do you steal that clothes? Why do you see those clothes? Yeah, Do you know what I mean? Like when Shane wears, you can see his lovely big circumcised penis sticking in the leg of the
chargers. I can see, I can see your wee fucking, your wee charts nose poking through the zipper there too. You fucking freak you. You're leaving skin everywhere when moisturised. Judo skins the biggest organ in the body. Yeah, maybe in years. We did a, we did a, we did a quiz on the way. Calvin did a quiz for me and Jordy on the way down the road. Yeah, the other day we did about an hour and a half a quizzing and the biggest organ in the body. Yep, I knew up. Jordy Rob. Got it.
Yeah, there's epidermis. Yeah. Blew my mind. All about skin, man. What what what say Mickey Barton was done the drive clinical the five hour drive. Are you going straight there or is making Bartley breaking it up? I'll. Probably stop with the old Applegreens for API. Usually convince myself to buy a wee chicken, a beacon sandwich. Yeah, another Red Bull or coffee. I had more. I had the most amount of coffees yesterday I've ever had in my life on Monday. Really.
Five, fuck off. I don't know. She had our age. 1. It's I, I if I have a coffee now I realise this on Monday, if I have a coffee post 7:00, I'm up all night but it does nothing at the time. So I have a cup of coffee, still feel tired and then get into bed and my brains like here. I have a few questions to ask you. Yes, I'll just lie there. Yeah, 5 coffees and that's bad for your heart. I know but not always having that but it needs most.
We're running low like my orange lights on and I need I'm just talking about I'm just I've only a week canister a petrol I can put in. You know, I'm not, I'm not able to refuel. You're driving on that. We spur Tyre, Louise, Skinny 1. You know, like that. Yeah, that's the coffee making. That's the music I'm listening. Umm Dan has the question please. People asking any gigs in Limerick this year right? Yes, I'm doing Dolan's in February, I want to say, which I'm really excited for.
Do you support? I haven't been down there so. Do you want to come down? Geordie will be. Quick, I've nothing actually booked in down South. My Diaries vary month to month. I'm still good point, but like there's no I don't have any like Oh, I an ear problem to do it. Would you like to have your year planned out? I miss him. I haven't really. Oh, my bar America in March. I've nothing going on this year. No, like I'm free all year. Yeah, pretty much.
Let's do something. Let's take off something. I don't go karting. Do you know what I think would be a good event? I don't even not even necessarily for comedians. I do. But I think someone should should do this because I saw one time Ouija. Board. No, fuck no. Don't mess with the black magic man. Don't want to, sorry. It. Was the Eddie Irvine know the Go Kart Centre? Yeah, you can go paintball in there, right? And I thought it was at the same time. Drive by.
Right, and I think that'll be a great fucking that is, that'll be a lot of fun. Yeah, I've never, I've go karted, never love people. People's good laugh. I shot him on a Willy one time, was the actor, but that's a different story. I think I'd like to do people. I think it'd be like, I think it could be like sneaky and I. Would love to. Do you ever see videos of those guys that are like mad into airsoft? Yeah, but I mean, like they're dressed up, like they're going
in direct. Yeah, better me. He's like, I'd love to go do that. I've been to Iraq. Do you know this one? Maybe we talked about this. Before no. Yeah, like years ago. Well, we had like I went as far like a college trip, like an exchanging. I'm talking like 15 years ago. I don't know how we've never had this conversation, Huh? So it was, it was like the diplomacy was way better so you could right. So you would like stay in big like major hotels.
You travel with the press because it was like a journalism course I was doing. Yeah, it was great. I was there for 9 days. It was brilliant. I actually, I don't, I don't know if I told you I did gigs in Afghanistan, entertain the troops, but they could understand what I was saying. I thought I told you but.
I had no idea either that. Because the most mental thing is our flight home was scheduled on like say like a Wednesday at 10:00 PM like a military, you're going to military craft to Dubai and then you flew home like commercial. But there was like a huge issue with our like translator was telling us like you basically need to leave now. I like loads of journalists. We're getting cleared and we had to get cleared out. So we had to just leave. Have I never have I? You've never told me.
Do you know how I? Got out of Iraq. Stop at the bottom of the lorry. No bit serious, I've never told you, but no extraction. The extraction. Yeah, this is so cool. Do you know how I got out of this Iran? I've never been. I've never been. I'm few myself. I can't believe I know we didn't go there. I knew him 15 years ago. 15 years. I knew you. You didn't do journalism. I know why I didn't fuck off. It's. Going to be where I am that's. More surprising, Michael.
What makes you tick? And show me I. Think it's all the. No, I've never been there. I've never been to Iraq, but trying to take a guy who has been there. Yeah, I don't want to talk about it. Yeah. Yeah. Do you believe I felt that? You can be cool? Talk to me for a second. You can be cool, love one of those jobs where you just sort of go in the war zone like off the books. When every cameras. No, you're just, you're just going to have a conversation. You're like almost a negotiator,
but no one knows who you are. And you just like, you know, you sit in the coffee shop and there's a guy at the table beside you. Have a quick You're all yes. He's ordered a lot to have soy milk, no? No, no, you're not tracking him. Oh, he's the same as you. You're the envoy, but it's all off the book. There's times I think. You go.
What's the lay of the land here? Because I think I could solve world, I could get World Peace by turning up the different world leaders with A6 pack of beers being all right as talk aside. Right. This must be here. This must be a deluded comedians thing, because I think I could bridge peace talks. Yeah, because a lot of time I've no dog in the fight.
Yeah. Say, say, though, say that it kicked off here and they were like, look, everyone's going up to storm and all these all the like paramilitary leaders, every, all these politicians, everyone. I think because I don't care. I'd be like, I go, guys. Come on, I would turn up with. That's all by the way. It's all I've got. I just say that and and then it doesn't work and I. I would turn up with all that. You fuck up to a bouncer. Yeah.
And I just pointed him and he would tell people to fuck up and. I do a Gaza, I show up with a chicken in a fishing rod and I'm like, let's. Sort this, but it will probably work. Yeah, I was 10. Walking walking to Putin's palace fucking 6 beer barking a chicken glad say. Glad you take a Magner bro. Do you want to watch a couple of judo videos? Camp and then we'll talk with
this. But you're right, I think every I think because they're all politicians are all like mental people to do that as a job that they when just and every man walks in and goes gas come. On Hey, what are we doing? Hey, what's? Going on here, there's. Planting you only get one life. How many billions do you? Have say sorry to him. Say sorry. Say, would you check? Sorry. Yeah, check how. Let me see your fingers. Say sorry for the atrocities you wanker.
Just call him a wanker. I didn't call him away. Yeah, I absolutely. I do think that's. But there must, it must be more complicated than that because it seems so easy to fix a lot of more problems. It must be more complicated. A lot of comics have done Warzone gigs. I know a couple of guys that did. Nick Cody did a bunch of gigs for the Australian troops and became mates with the in Afghanistan and became mates of some of the Australian SAS guys.
And I met one of them in Sydney a couple of years ago. He's like APT now and there's one of the most gentle, lovely human beings ever met in my life. And then could be like, yeah, I'll fucking blew a couple of people up. Do you want to be here? Like, I've got a couple of stories too, you know? You want to see a war zone? Empire, 2000. And nine, you have to do the path you don't know start. With both bomb bro. All right, I did a gig for the Queen's Jubilee. Don't even like a bitch.
It's I, it's a yeah, that's all I have said that. Remember I couple of years ago they went, would you do a gig, like an outdoor gig in Newton Abbey? I've told you forever. I don't know. We, in fact, we didn't. Let me guess. Oh, yeah, Yeah. You got an easy life through. Yeah, so. Me and Mick both got asked separately by the same company if we would do outdoor gigs in
like different places, right? And I was like, I got off this we're outdoor gig and you went I have two and yours in Antrim. I was new so I was like, yeah, I'll do it. Then they go and I go can I book the line up to like just bring 2 comics? And I bought Dave and Butler thing so Butler might be able to tell us about his recollections of it. And we arrived and I was to do, they were to do 10 minutes each and I was doing half an hour
something like that. And then closer to the time, like a week before it can't remember who messaged me on Instagram, was like Sony for another comedian. I was like, it's a bit of a mad look, send me a screenshot. And it was a headshot of me that advertised this on the council. Put it up with giant purple background, huge crying in the background. Yeah. She and Todd live at the jubilee celebrations. Was never told that that's what it was for. But then they said I was like, I had no what?
Like this was never mentioned. And they went, well, you still do it. And I was like, oh, dad, I was like, I'll still do it like no problem. Like, you know, I don't mind. I will. I will. I will do.
It Yeah, we. Arrived on but I was like I don't like the image I don't like this you know just call it like a show and we got down and they were delayed starting yeah, but you had to be finished by a certain time because they were going to stream the Jubilee live is not that they were going to stream something on a giant screen. So by that they kept delaying us. So say we had 40 minutes to fill with comedy like 20 minutes into that time they kept coming back. Doesn't go last.
We are so sorry about this but this is running over and I was like. Fuck sake. So how long am I doing here? See by the time Dave and Butler did their thing, they came up and went we're even less time. The guy goes, I supposed to do half an hour and it was like real good money and the guy goes, I'm really sorry, could you do your set in 7 minutes? And I went. Bastard, I went. Just for you. So my, my, what happened to me was the phone.
We went, do you want to do a gig for the Queens Jubilee? And I was like, I don't know when I think that might be politically charged and made a big good idea. And then they told me how much money it was, and I was all God save the woman. Always. It was really good money, I. Must have sold some jewels back to some other poor country to fund our fees because that was
unreal. It was that that girl that accused Prince Andrew of all that stuff would have got more money, Yeah. If it wasn't for me, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And because I don't know but I couldn't help with the rest of coffee. But I I saw another comedian who shall remain unnamed. Paddy Raff said no to it, said yes and then pulled out and they're like, who can we get in short notice? They didn't tell me you could bring support, didn't tell me
any, that sort of stuff. So I turned up at an afternoon picnic with family sitting around. Yeah, that's what that's like. No swearing, no political stuff, don't make fun of the royal family, don't do this. And I'm like, how long we doing in 40 minutes? And I was like. Because we're we're, we're the same in that we don't really care about what it's for. Like either set events, either sort of set a community, is there an audience of people and we're going to do.
Common. I mean, we do occur. I mean, if the Ku Klux Klan phoned up, more like we've got £300, you want to come do a set? Cash your transfer. I don't know who it was anyway I was supposed. To. I Is there anybody you wouldn't get? I wouldn't get for a political party. No, no. I would draw. I would stop there. No, I got asked. I got asked you. Before I've been asked to you. And I also I got asked to do, I didn't care about anything in politics, not careful because we
were safety more their shit. I got asked to host like a Brexit debate in Queens. They were like, it's going to be more laid back. It was for students and loads of local politicians were there and I was sort of chairing it. And I was like, I would do they really want me to do this? And they said, yeah, it was very but a year before covertism. And then I found said it was 8 politicians. Two of them were really signed. I Claire Hannah might have been one of them who was like totally dead on.
Yeah, just mainly decades because they got yeah, they got into this like back and forth slab and they were interrupting each other, which you know that they do anyway. But I was like, oh, I thought this was going to be like laid back a bit of crack. And they were. I just found so many of them. And I'm sure there is a met nice politicians. Yeah, but I was like, you guys
are like the worst. It's, I think there's a weird thing of like, and Billy Connolly one time said in a special like, anybody who says they want to be in politics should be immediately banned from being in politics. Yeah, should be like that. I agree with that. Reluctant to be made to do it as. Opposed to being like, I fucking want to do this. Yeah. Because you're too easily
corruptible. Yeah. And I have this weird any any politician that talks about legacy, I go you fuck when you're trying to get people to remember you. You're narcissistic. Fuck yeah, Joe. I remember even McCann for people before profit. Yeah, yeah. He from Derry. Yeah, yeah, he did a thing in
Storm once. I was like he should be king of the world where the DUP were complaining about sodomy and sodomites and it was all this fucking anti-gay stuff and even we can't stood up in store and went just on the on the members reference to sodomy there. I would just ask have you ever actually tried it? It's not bad. And I was like, yes, fucking get him in. Did he actually? Yeah, it was brilliant in a hoodie, like wasn't he wearing a suit?
And there's, yeah, there's there's a definite element of, I remember we were in school, we interviewed politicians for our politics class and it was supposed to be a cross community thing, right? But none of the Protestant schools signed up in time. So it was just my politics class, right. And there was a weird thing of like every week could be, you know, Sinn Fein and then next
week's SDLP. Here. And because it was a week Catholic school, a lot of them were like politically charged in the questions. So like the Northern bank robbery just happened and we interviewed a Sinn Fein politician and everybody had kind of decided they were going to vote Sinn Fein. So they were like giving him an easy ride. Whereas I was like, no, fuck that. He's getting the same grill that the UP fell I got. He's in like this smartest suit you've ever seen.
Custom suits, cigar. But yeah, you know, designer sunglasses. Grills and all. Money hanging out of a brief. Northern Braces fucking tells me about the clown in his back pocket. But I basically said this, and this is 20 years ago, so. But I don't think it's cheap. My mind hasn't changed, but I think a lot of people do get involved in politics because they genuinely want to change their community. They're doing it for the right reasons.
What happens is they get in and then the party goes right, Well, we're, this is what our stance is going to be on certain things. So they have to start taking their own morals out of it for the good of the party. And then that becomes whoever's in charge is now telling you what to do, and the person charge meant that. Always know what the fuck you're talking about? Well, look at. Look at the Bernie Sanders.
Like. Basically, when he was out of the run, he's like, get behind, get behind Trump and then do you see him? Grilled Bernie Sanders to get behind Trump. I think so, I think. You think what, Robert Kennedy? No, no, no, I'm talking about Bernie Sanders. I don't think Bernie Sanders. I think when it came down to. I don't think I watched a documentary the other night. Foreign Hit 11/9 is Michael Moore documentary. Foreign hit 9. 11, no foreign hit 11/9. So 11911 is the one about 911.
And 11/9 is about, it starts with Trump getting inaugurated. And the start of the documentary is like how the fuck did this happen? And Michael Moore sort of goes through a lot of things that have happened in America since pretty much since 911. And Bernie Sanders was it was kind of like Jeremy Corbyn won like a popular vote. So the people wanted him in and the Democratic Party basically went, now we're going to go with Hillary.
So even though term Bernie Sanders was more popular, yeah, they went with Hillary Clinton. Yeah. And I I the world, I'm convinced the world would have been in a much better place had Jeremy Corbyn and Bernie Sanders been in charge of these two countries, just because they they seem to have a good record of actually helping people. They're individuals as well that like you say, probably wouldn't get swayed by like the higher up people in the party going.
This is what you think about. Yeah, but The thing is, they didn't get sweat. That's the problem. But did you say Sanders could have been like, they fucking, they took me out of a job, these mother fuckers that he just want? Hillary's good, I guess. Did you see Bernie Grill and RFK? No, not yet. I think the Senate maybe about He's like, should health? Do you think healthcare should be like a right? Like should everyone be? Should people be entitled to healthcare?
Yeah, like free healthcare and RFK is like. See, that's another fucking I I was a big fan of his right, just because there was there was, was I said was right because I heard him talking about, Yeah, I heard him talking about like different times he's taken big companies to court and won lawsuits. I was like, he seemed like the type of guy who's actually fucking trying to help people. And then as soon as he joined Trump, we're like, why are you doing that there?
And I was trying to defend him the other day. There was someone told a story about when he was younger he founded he was a parent and he found a dead wheel on the beach and went to the house and got a chainsaw and cut the wheels head off and took it home with his kids in the car and they were like there was wheel got spilled into the car. So I heard myself going I but he was on her at the time. I'm like, why defend these Cubs like?
I someone in this room, I told the story in the podcast before someone has room was once an odd duck pond and they're die. I mean they were like it or something and they're die opened the door and was like watch this and how do we bit of bread and held it in sound while still in the driver's seat of the car. We dock waddles over that's a dab. Now he holds the bread. The duck came over and then he
was what, just boys? And they slammed the duck's head in the car door, killed the duck, put it in the backseat of the car with the kids, took it home, cooked do. You know what The funny thing with that is? See, if you just waited, the bread will kill the duck anyway. Not supposed to get us gluten free. You were trying to give a bread or a doctor gluten free bread. I've tried to get that's right going wrong. I'm trying to give ducks to gluten free bread. They're not. Making better.
I love duck. Class I love. I love them all. I love duck pancakes. For lovely weed creatures. I love duck. I think anyone that's bad, that duck should go to fucking prison. Yeah, I think. I love that pancakes with hoisin and shredded cucumber. Who are there part of your rap group? I do like we, but sure, I like all the meats. Is there any? Is there any anything, any meat you've ever eaten? I've left it too long with Lamb and now I'm getting a bit weird about it you.
Never had a kebab. Yeah, you just go Islam, I know, but. Like lamb lamb. Oh, I had rabbit one time and in France and didn't like that. Had Kangaroos. Wells, Barson. I crocodile in Florida, not another one liner really was good breaded and bread crumbs with cheese. It was 10 or 10. To see the chicken. Does it taste like chicken? Yes. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Was the order snappy? Will you go to Chick-fil-A? It's in. All. The Apple greens though is it? Have you ever tried check?
Have you tried check No. It's massive. It's in the Apple Which. 1. Your dog kills ducks, so. Yeah, yeah, fuck up. Right, Tony? Yeah, that's. Bad quack some neck only on I got per dog. We send you the bill. You're not a set of Chick-fil-A. You're not, are you? Are you like a Are you a fried chicken guy? Hello, but a fried chicken I. Well, then you're like. Chick-fil-A. All right, that'll go all right. I just didn't know it was coming here. I've never had a Taco Bell. I think I have fine.
It's one of those things where that in America, Taco Bell and check Valera, are they not shitty restaurants there and come here, we're all. Like, yeah, top three fast food chains anywhere around the world go. Burger King, Subway landlords. You call landlords fast. Food not a Not in a fast food chain. I in Australia I saw Nando's in a petrol station in Australia and it was fantastic. Well then I'll take it. I'll go KFC. I'm a Burger King fan.
I have to say that I think Burger King, Trump's, McDonald's. I'll go McDonald's. I'll go What else do I like? Shake Shack. Shake. Shack. Oh, I forgot about them. Five guys. And I'll go in and out, in and out, burger. 5 Five guys I'll take. I'll swap KFC for Five Guys, yeah. Five guys, great. I hear when people complain about the price. Don't. It's worth it. It's worth the price. Don has for the question, please. Dave wants to know what's your favourite sandwich and he wants details.
I love this kind of stuff. Yeah. So can I just give you a memory of a time where I went That's the best sandwich because of the context that I've ever had. Do you remember the very start of the first lockdown? The weather was unbelievable. Yes. I think it was like a May time. April, May. It was gorgeous. Yeah, I was wearing shorts in April. Well, it's never happened. It was like early 20s degrees and I remember everyone just
bored. Started in DIY around the house and I started painting the fence. Weather was amazing. We Bluetooth speaker outside Motown mix cider. Would you? Would you believe that? Would you believe that you did drink paint? We cider glass of ice. Then we were like. Yeah, you feel like you're on the roof in Shawshank I. Mean this is class. And we're like, what? I want to go with this for a lunch and I decided to make us holiday lunches. Right. Club sandwich with a wee side of
chips. Unbelievable on. You took that long to say club sandwich, That's what that was going to be, a club sandwich. Club Sandwich. Fucking back on the. Your club sandwich that was for Lt. This is 1 of this one of the questions on the way to Colonic Guilty. Oh, chicken lettuce. Under big, is that right? Cool, the boys know how to travel. It's it's anyway, it's really good for your big organ. I've never had a club that was no have. Is there tomato and a club sandwich?
Yeah, I don't like tomato. You take it. I know, but I hate taking to my daughter stuff and there's a seed in there. It's going to piss me off, Joe. To bring the sandwich. Jam sandwich. The humble jam sandwich, Yeah. I like I like a chicken and bacon or sandwich my dad used to make which was just two bits of white toast, bacon, sausage, potato bread and spunk bacon sauce, potato bread and Heinz spicy BBQ sauce. That's. Cheeky likes fucking cheeky. That's cheeky. That's good.
Yeah. Don't you just put a full fry in between 2 with toast? Yeah. Unreal. But I don't know about the spicy red sauce, you know what I mean? It's not really BBQ sauce. It's classic spicy BBQ. Yeah, don't pass my back and tell me it's. Real I wouldn't spicy BBQ sauce. It's good shit. Yeah, at the meant like I would go for you know what I love on a sandwich? Egg. No. Yeah, I disagree. Cold egg for some reason upsets me. Egg and onion. See you. No, no, no. I think. I don't.
I don't think you deserve mouth. You have no aspirations if you. Yeah, I think it's like people who eat dark chocolate and tell me it's good for you. Fuck off, right? Do you know what I mean? I just don't trust those people. But you have a legacy, don't you? We were saying on the way, on the way down to clinical, it's hot. It's difficult to trust people our age don't drive. I agree do.
You know what I mean? Yeah, I don't trust people who don't drive and I don't trust people who've never drank. What time is he on? Yeah, people who? People who are age, you can't drive. I just don't understand. I don't know. I don't think. Where do you go? You don't know how good it's going to be. Yeah, Do we get a bus everywhere? Yeah, what if? You're like, I don't have to plan your entire day around what time the bus is going to be.
There, Yeah. You're taxing some girl and she's like, you need to get here right now, big boy. You're like. Let me. Check on the timetable. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Can you pick me up? Here's what I want you to do. She's like, what do you want me to do? Get in your car and drive that and you pick me up from the boss? Get me off the bus. Here's what I want you to do. Take me to the cinema. Can I meet you there? I don't know I I I passed my driving test like relatively late.
But half. 4 I was 21. Passed around. Yeah. Do you pass first time? Yeah. That's I didn't I feel first time. Which is how mental isn't when people are like, yeah, I took twelve goals, the password driving test, I'm like, there should be a call. You don't get it absolutely 100%. Anybody who feels a theory test the first time, should Miller Dr Either do. You remember the first click? When you see a hug and hazard. Do you remember the first drive you took when you passed your test?
Yeah. Where do you go? At the girlfriend's house at the time I was like get in quick for your masses. Actually the first but I did once drive without password test were made. I was statement and needed more beer to the off licence. I was all outside anymore. I cops. I was. I just think that monafort, right? You remember my Corsa? Yeah, when we got stuck in, we went to Glasgow break. Yeah, it was when I went to would try and lift it. That's right. Do you Remember Me and you tried
to lift a car out of a ditch? Yeah, it wasn't, it wasn't in a ditch. It was all of that. It's the way I have never just heard it. I the way that we're talking about. Sorry if I, but I don't know how you got that car. Like all four wheels were off the ground. Yeah, like you reverse it up the Bank of a ditch and then? It was a sheet, wasn't it? Yeah, we went up just. Before sat NAV ended, I also remember you drinking 12 beers not being drunk. At Glasgow.
At Glasgow, where you drunk a full case of beer and you were fine and I was twatted. Yeah, that was the same weekend I went for AP by fence and a fly Lambda. Morally big fly the seagull. Umm Oh my first drive I went down to Halfords a Collins water. They stay and we're covering. Very nice. To get get they get the car kitted out some some mats, you know. Chrome or just standard? I got. I used to get a. You could get like push on top like. Clips of the pedals. No for your rims.
Or hubcaps. Hubcaps, yeah. I love getting a wee pack of hubcaps that settle a. Good rim, don't you? Four of them I loved it and I listened to, I was like, I'm only going to do this once. Lil Wayne and Millie as I was driving down the Upper Newtard Rd. Of course I saw Millie like a chain of some. Millie and Millie. I mine was ash go. From Marsh. No, the other. One like no Chandler. Yeah, and feeder, just a day that was like 45.
You love ocean colour scene? Anytime I hear ocean colour scene it reminds me of Mickey Bartlett. Yeah, I used to love those two songs. You did, yeah. Daniels with a question, please. So very. Fresh beast. Thanks. Also earlier whatever you were taking your jump rope, I saw your stomach and you've got a great bod. This guy's been working on himself. I sort of focus. It's very impressive. You don't get false expected. Like you don't get that for free, Mickey.
Swear to God I wish I don't. Carey wants to know If you're stranded on a desert island and you could only bring three things, what are you bringing? A phone. A boat and a bag of Doritos. I wouldn't cope well. Neither of us will cope well. I won't do it. I do. I sometimes think like you watch like the Last of Us, you go with the world land and I survived along when I last I go 45 minutes tops Yeah, I watched new the app. Have you seen The Last of Us? No, it's brilliant show. There's.
That the one they're shooting each other. What? Play Clivey and. No, no, no, that's no, that's fucking some other shit. So the Last of Us of the show was it was based on a video game. It was like a zombie apocalypse thing. It's an episode of it where Nick Offerman and Murray Bartlett, no relation or like a so Nick Offerman plays a survivalist and Murray Bartlett's character falls into one of his traps like he is a wee fucking pit.
And then he makes him a dinner and then turns out they're fucking gay fellas and they fall madly in love. That's a beautiful one, Emmys. It's a fucking really good episode. But I was watching that last night thinking, I wonder, I wonder how can I survive the fucking apocalypse? And I looked around my house and I can't. I can barely get through a recession. As long as you had the Audi, as long as you had the TT. I've not the tall. You couldn't. I wouldn't do the apocalypse.
You wouldn't leave the Audi TT, you'd stay in. All right, but I. Remember a couple of years ago when you started going to Australia and I was like, would you not just move there? And you genuinely was like, I can't take my car. No, I looked into tech in the car, right. It was going to cost, but tech in the car to Australia would cost but the same as a first class flight. And I was like. I would hate it an apocalypse. Apocalypse.
I know. I think I do think there's there's an element of because we're getting a wee bit older, our testosterone starting to lower wee bit. Yeah, like 10 years where I'm like, I'll fuck, I'll take a zombie apart. I eat a zombie, a zombie. We were on the way. Yeah. And now I'm like, I hope to God I've never happened. Yeah, I think it wouldn't be long for you. Just like you're just like. Go I just know full as soon as I run our probiotics, my skin gets bad again.
They were like, Nah, I can't even go out. But then they might Zombie, they might. Think you're a zombie? I'd. Be walking past zombies as long as you're going. Because you'd be blocked too at that point. If there was a pocket, you'd be back on the way. Stay would be just yeah, yeah, absolutely. Zombies would be talking about me like I'm Chick-fil-A. Would you that? Oh no, given zombies. They think you're a zombie, daddy. Yeah. If you walked away zombies.
I had a Mickey bar. That's a little free. Well, after Battle of the Bone, I would know how to deal with that, that that's something. Kung Fu. If you had me, you'd be happy. You would know that I could get out of that situation. You're gigging tonight. Bring our guests because we're going to take a break in 5 minutes. Yes, in the Beehive tonight and Mandel tomorrow, but it's sold out so special, that second part. Special Tip No. Idea what you want to do, but I yeah.
Show business, baby. You re jacket. We jacket maybe I might wear AT shirt. What song you want to walk on to? I haven't even thought of that. But then if you play a song and you walk on to it, then if you use that in the special they might flag. It I know. You should you should record an original like what song are you walking on to the Turkmen. I would love that. Well, at the minute I was walking on the David Bowie. He's dead. He consumer. Yeah, no, you do your own version of it.
Yeah, it's. Recordable. I would, I would, I would love to walk. I like walking. I'll do it. What song, eh? The Ballad of Burnt de Bellafaro. That's what's going to say. I like. I like. Whistle. What? What's on? David Boy. Oh boy, I would Rebel. Rebel, rebel, rebel. Rebel, rebel. I think you're man. Yeah, that'll be great. Changes. Yep, sweet. So it starts at it if you like. Either I can come there. You can just sing me on. Grounds control to Major Tom. Adrian.
Adrian, get out of my palm. That's a Dalek. That's a really good Dalek. It's Tammy Night. My Daleks very Jimmy Savile. Now then, now then. Yeah, both scary predators, young man. Danis with a question or comment there please A. Couple of people asking Mickey how's Dry January been? Fucking flawless. He's flying. Are you saying how to sip? And you think about extending it. Yeah, I'm going to go to dry February as well. Oh yeah, that's big news.
I bet Willie could last my birthday, which is 10th of March. But I don't know. I think I've just got I think I've just completed drinking. Yeah. I don't want to say I'm never going to drink again because it'll people go though, but I've generally had a point in my life where I just go. Do you saw a video of Roy Kane talking about Roy Kane just went when it stops being good crack. I was like I. Yeah. I don't like going to pubs anymore, don't want to go. Out do you do you physically
feel like way different? Yeah, like absolutely. Like I haven't got any lighter, but I've got slimmer. Yeah, I don't have anxiety from hangovers because hangovers 2 days, nearly 30s. Like, yeah, I'm getting the admin done. Do you mean I'm gagging loads right and stuff? Yeah, I'll be there. I feel really healthy. I am. I'm trying to give up. Can I tell you my Revise Dairy Milk almond bar? The just the not one. Is that the? Almond chocolate made with
almond milk. Oh fuck, I didn't know it was a thing. I can't. I'd say that's amazing. I sometimes drive just to get it and I just eat it in the car park. I swear to God I'm mullet in the car park and I wish I could sit with a cup of tea at home. Maybe put the football on break off square by square, 2 rows at a time. I just. It's like the least etiquette you'll ever see me with. See, last week I went through this boner, this debauched phase of just fucking loving Weetabix.
I don't know why, but for a full week I was and I knew it 33 Weetabix at the time. I knew it was getting bad dry. No, no, no, not at all. But it was putting like fucking like I do have a wee bit of a gluten intolerance and a dairy intolerance and I've taken them out of my diet largely for the last couple of years. And then for a week I was going I just want to fucking all the gluten all the fucking and
stomach was in beds. But I eat Weetabix in a really nasty way because I don't like it to get too soggy. So I usually have it made and it's like the spoon has to go straight in Once the melts in and I have it, I won't even I won't even get to the kitchen table. I'll eat it like. I I only wanted to be soggy. No, the perfect the. Perfect with me here. Dance for. You the perfect bit of Weetabix is when it's it's starting to go soggy, but there's still a bit
of crunch, crunchiness. No, like halfway I think. You should probably try depping it. Depping it you're a fucking. I just can't go you well. Dippin Weetabix, how many Weetabix you different today? I mean, unfortunately I can't anymore. Don't Rob would have. Been 3 or 4 like no problem just dip them. Dip them in like in a bowl of water, no. He's doing this in the middle. Of the with your hand and you just what happens? You're getting towards the end because it's going to seep in.
I'll just cut the middle with a spoon like a gentleman. You don't mind, Savage? I want it to be the one. I want it and the milk to become one consistency. That's porridgement. No, you don't want that. You want to fucking joy. I loved her. I do love a cereal. See Frosties. Can I tell you I can't take them anymore? Can I tell you what I love? Cookie crisps. Cookie Crisp class. Big, massible. Oh, we've said before, Cinnamon Graham. Golden Grahams. I'm a Golden Grahams man.
I'm a Golden Grahams man. Ricycles. Ricycles fucking cereal nostalgia. What happened? Honey not lips. Yeah, Honey, not. Lips with the bomb. And they were better than honey. Not Cheerios. Yeah, yeah, they were better. Start. Remember, start. I got back, but again, the bike in the front, yeah, oh man, they were, they were, they were underground like. Yeah, what was the golden Nuggets? Remember golden Nuggets? 100% the prospector on the cover. Yeah, I love golden Nuggets. Fantastic.
So good for you as well. That probably probably 'cause every fucking medical issue we have. Eh, eh. Sugar puffs. Sugar puffs. Sugar puffs are alright, but then you went for a pain and smell like sugar puffs. And I love, but I love sugar puffs. Yeah. I love sugar puffs. Sugar pot again. Sugar puffs. Didn't want them too soggy now that was. The thing that was the problem with sugar puffs, the first fucking half, it was class. Yeah, second-half special care bit of sugar class. Brown.
Flakes good gear like a bro fruit not. Never had it next says Crunchy Nuts. Never had it. Crunchy nuts Just a Poshmont Frosties doing crunchy nuts Frosties would give a job. Right, right, right. Whatever. Frosted weights. Frosted weights many bite sized wheat effects with sugar already on them. Let's address it. Get out frosted weights. What are they? Are we missing any Coco pops? Wheatles. Wheatles.
Yeah, it was good. Every time someone mentions Coco Pops, I'll bring it up because I feel like it's a Mandela Effect thing that no one remembers. There was one year for Halloween, they had a limited edition Coco Pops were half the cocoa Pops were scared white so it was white chocolate and normal chocolate, a blended flavour of Coco pop and fuck me it was incredible. I bet you could track those down online. You won't need them.
I was about 20 years ago. Once the diabetes picked like I threw it up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're going to take a very quick break for 5-10 minutes and then our Butler will join us, but we're here. No, not yet. He's been in the chat. He has a bar he's blocked. You better be getting cereal, I'm starving. We're back in a couple minutes. Cheers. You baby.
The gentleman Welcome back to this live stream episode, the last daily brew of the week with my guests Mickey Bartlett and joining us all the way from where have you been in your? House. I've just been in my house. All the way from his house and the address is no Aaron. Butler noon improved arm Butler CBD oil Arm Butler guys. I need, yes, we need to talk about this. Because I'm. On the gear head. You fucking junkie Bob Marley. How dare you? Absolute Bob Marley. That's my deck.
Don't know if you don't mind. Aaron Butler. He got me, got got tea with me. You know my name, Aaron Butler. Ring ring pussy now the pussy dead. What talk to bomber clock Don't. Understand any of that, but it's very funny. Fucking you're hooked man that's. Show me your free The Way tattoo. I got CBD mixed with melatonin. I'm sleeping like a baby at the minute. She's very nicely. Yeah, it's big. Gummy. Yeah, big national. CBD gummies are good. No it's the drops and doing
drops. I good gummies hardcore and the problem is when you get you start getting used to them and I'm going to bed like half a packet and there's so much sugar that I'm wired up. Washing it down with coke, Yeah. So I'm going to ask you how you could start in that, because that's huge news from. Big, big, big changes in the. Or do a 3:00 today the live teams me from the waterfront hall with you, me and Willie T master chef after dark is going live on Patreon. Wow at 3:00.
And we're doing this ahead of the live SSE show on the 23rd of May. I tickets for that are available now. Ticket Master. We've made the arena bigger already and we'll just keep plodding on seeing what happens, but tickets are flying out. Bigger, better, Brasher browsers. On cut. So you're a drug game, he's called. The. Starting Tenerife. Starting 10 right with the bad crowd. What happened you I know what
happened. You walked in the street singing and a couple of guys were in a fucking barrel on fire comb when they're her and then they saw you and it became this like he was like. Hey. Buddy, you want to get high. What do I got to do to join your? Crew, I don't even know how to get high. You're going to be fine but man to give you a nickname like but man. Oh, you mean? The just saw the junior was Yeah. I get in trouble, my pops are
going crazy. Like, hey Kappa, you don't tell me what to do. I like how all this hot in Tenerife by the way. Amigos, chill out, they go. No, you're going to chill out. It's the policy. I just want to do a pharmacy and. But why? What meat? What was? It a pharmacy in a fucking Winnebago. No guys making their own CBD. Next you tell me you're drinking chamomile tea. Yeah, Mad Bath. No, no, I haven't got that far yet. So what, how? What drove Aaron Butler? I was on one of my routine daily
walks. I was having it around noon time and. By the way, around 77. Yeah, and on one of those, I was happened to be walking past the pharmacy. You know, you're in farms in your holidays. You let's see what they have. Let's see like what different gear I can get in here that's legal. And I was like, what? What would be the number one thing to put me asleep? Like what's your sleep? We haven't. Probably the electric chair I have. Yeah, I have trouble sleeping always, right.
And they were like because. You're walking too early, Yeah. It's like 7:00 AM. Hey, good morning. No, this is all above board and like. See, when you say the phrase it's all about board sounds like it's not all about. Board. I know, I know, but they were just like put these wheat 3 drops in your mouth before you go to bed and see what happens and. Then try CBD. And then trash drops PPD, Yeah, and then? Taking trash drops. Trash drops. Yeah. Trash drops.
Yep, that's right. Oh, tres, yeah, I thought it was the brown. So did you feel like, were you getting like a bit of an adrenaline rush, like even buying them? No, it's meant to. No, but I mean, yeah, you may. Imagine you've been so sober your whole life that you just see. But in you're like, man, the walls are melting. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I see. You. Start them that night back in the. Beetles. Yeah. Back in the room. I they said take it half hour before you plan to go with
sleep. So it was about half nine. Want to get sleep at 10? Take drops. I'd like a light. Brilliant. Had the best night sleep in my life. We'll tell you what it that's a good sleep. It's very good sleep. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And yeah, been on it and. You've never looked back. 10 hours back, it's too much sleep. That's a wee wait. 7/7 or 45 minutes. Did anyone watch the Brian Johnson documentary? No, no, because he's all about optimal sleep and stuff and. Brian.
Johnson. He's the guy who's trying to stay alive for as long as possible. The millionaire. Oh, and. He has a documentary on Netflix. I don't think you'll do it and on, but is this. The same guy who's been like, oh, by the way, the things I've tried are killing me. Well, yeah, there's a bit of that. Biohacking. Yeah, but in the documentaries like, yeah, I've got my blood boy. So we need to start getting blood boys. So a blood boy is when a. Child hooked A rated and you
suck the neck every three days. Not far off, yeah, but what it's the Boy George essentially it's when you get there support is that a photo of them there while dragon but you get it does. Look very vampiric to me. Yeah, well, he doesn't because he's trying to protect the skinny. Never want. He's always putting factor 5, factor 50 on two to be fair. It all. It's all just. Collected. It has all just collected. You're a mentor.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm putting all sorts of serums and creams and all on my face trying to stay like this guy. But he he has a blood boy. What is a blood boy? What, boy is someone that's younger than you who has healthy blood and you transfuse your blood or their blood to you so that you can live longer and have like more longevity? And then the boy dies within 3 days. Well, the boy was his son. He was. Used. Oh God. Well, here's what the documentary does.
By the way, you should watch this documentary because it's very, very freaky. It's very insatious. So he gets his son's blood. He then gives his blood to his dad. So they're getting 3 generations of blood. So the dad is not only getting his blood, but he's getting his grandson's blood transfused Indium and they're all. They sleep upside down like that. May as well there's. No reflections. I do recommend watching it because there is some interesting stuff involved.
Candy garlic. Afraid of crucifixes? That's that's sick as fuck. Yep. So yeah, Brian Johnson, my new hero. So it's weird if I try to give my dad my bloody tell me to. Fuck off, don't try to stay sober me. I can't wait to drive in three weeks. Your blood without a head on. 100% if I donate. If I donate, blood comes out in 35 mill measures. Used to put like 3/4 of your blood out first and then the last quarter. Put in the cup and check it. I think his blood type is Smithwicks.
Yeah, you want to take my blood through a beer ball? Oh, so I've seen this guy. I didn't know a lot about it. Documentary Netflix or it's on Netflix. It's just I think it's called Live Forever or something like that. People saying this guy might be weird. Yeah, he's quite. He's quite. He's all about his sleep. So he doesn't let, he makes a promise of himself. He's like, I will not let anything get in the way of my sleep. So. Apart from sucking blood or your son?
So he's like 9:00. I'm sleeping. I don't care what's, I don't care if I get offered an eight way orgy with the most beautiful girls in the world. I'm sleeping. Why was the other number you picked just when you go three I'm? Freaking out right now. She was sleeping now. He goes asleep and wakes up at half four I think and then first thing he does is like hydrate and work out and then does like some emails. He has a whole some emails. He has a whole he still. Has through normal.
He goes. He has admin. His planner, wake up at 4:30, workout, hydrate, emails, drink son's blood. Yeah. He takes, he takes 100 vitamin pills. Jesus Christ. So like I take like a bit of fish oil or a bit of a vitamin D or whatever this guy has. This guy has a full stack of like and he's just just him and his son in the kitchen in the morning just popping. Those together. He is late 40s I wanna say. But he looks old. It doesn't look.
Good. Yeah, they say, because he's like lost a bit of weight and stuff in his face. He looks a bit sunken in and stuff, but oh, this is what him and his son do. Him. And you love this. Him and. His son use a device when they go asleep at night to measure the quality and length of their boners. So he's comparing his boner to his son's boner because he was. Why? Because there's Blood, the deck, he's thinking, how many years? Is that? The three. Is that the three generations?
Yes. So they do this weird photo shoot together, That's what it is. And they show it in the documentary and they're hugging by a river and also. What does that look like? Pot butcher in a fucking ball cap. Yeah, the dad. So The funny thing is the son and the dad are like, not in bad shape. The other, the granddad has not looked after himself all his life, but they're trying to like, you know, they're like, let's just see if we can get you a bit better. So yeah. There's other ways.
There used to be Mormon broccoli, used to be Mormons, used to be hardcore Mormons, and then they left the church and now they can't talk to his wife and the other kids. It's very weird. But yeah, they're made. Yeah, he thinks they're weirdos. Yeah. They need bloody negatives over here. Son, do you fancy a pet? But yeah, they're he's measuring his erection quality as he gets older and apparently it's just like his son. So he's 47 but has the erection of 18 year old. Oh, that's the age.
But I also watched a documentary on Channel 4 called My Massive Cock. That's a good one. No. What's that about? No, exactly. Yeah, just. Looking for me, I was an extra. But it's a good one to watch. You played the cock before cock, but yeah, it's a good one because it shows showcases like different people in the UK and case studies on big, big, big cocks like lads. Because it was the guy, the famous guy who.
Was on this morning, they only kept getting stopped at airports because they only had a concealed weapon which had a 13 inch cock saw. So these are about 10, these are about 10 or 11 and one guy plays. For young people documentary. Like. A football team, one guy plays for a football team and every time he goes in the change room all the lads is banter or taking photos of it and send it around the entire village.
And he's complaining like I don't consent to any of these and his mates are like waves up. You have a big Dick, let's show everybody. So he's having a bad time. There's one guy. Who just drying his tears was caught, didn't. Have issues like as in is your medical? They're complaining, they're saying it's too big, they're like, I can't have sex with this and all it's that big and stuff like that. It's that big, you could have sex actually with it.
Yeah, yeah, what the heck of it personally. Yeah, there's one guy on who is like 5 foot three. Like no rake. Yeah, yeah. He's a rake of a he looks like a kid, like he's 25 or whatever, but he's just looks malnourished. But the piece on him is 1/10 of the size of them they've calculated and it's just 10. Percent cock. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it gets. I wouldn't have James. Weirdly. If I if I if I had 10% of my body was my Willy, yeah, I
wouldn't fucking. Have James, but the best part I'd be. Driving along the road, would you say out the window? You see the piece? Yeah, well here's the thing. They make a mould of it. This is the weird part of the documentary. That's the weird part. Yeah, but here's why it's weird because they make a mould of it and they show him having lunch with his mates later that day and he just reaches down and goes and sticks it on the table and they're all like.
That's an erect like. Hard or soft? I think it's soft. Like, yeah, yeah. But it's, it's my name. One guy looks about getting into a reduction done and then he decides against it because it's not medically like the most safest thing to do. I've watched a lot of good stuff recently. Anyway, this article was telling you about. We haven't even addressed the guy catfishing you or the fact that you're wearing your own region merchandise.
Well shout out to our friend the Irish Yang because his it's his buddies company Dan who sorted it out when he was here. Remember he had lunch from that day so thank you very much. It's a new pickleball kit for Armagh. So 5 ini towns top locations in the UK for sex toy purchases. Guys, what do you think the top five are? Easily Cookstown zipper. OK, thanks. Not involved in the. List sauces their ground. Keep guessing though. I want to say Ballymena. No, you're. Not green pastures.
Search me, they wouldn't be having that. I thought you're suppressed. Might be fucking. Not Lauren, no. Ported on. Not ported. Belfast. Would be one of them. No, it's not even. No, you haven't got any, no. You're going where I'm not dairy. No, no, and amazed you haven't even guessed one right here. Not falling the hench. No S killin is #1. For.
Sex toys it was found to purchase more vibrators per person than the rest of the UK, and Newton Ards bought more costumes and Ballyclare more anal toys. Ballyclare is loving. Yeah. So the list is number one in a skillin #2 Down Patrick #3 Dungannon #4 ards #5 Ballyclare. She's Bally. Claire is not even a big place. No, but they're loving their little toys, your consciousness, you know? It turns out actually the home and Oma was common from asylum. Yeah. I don't measure on the director
skill. That's nicely done. Yeah, I wouldn't have thought that at all. Wouldn't have those. Yeah, we learned something today. That's what you can't sell tickets on a skill. They're all in the house, bad teeth and crossed eyes. Common all the time. See when you see them. Coming I'm going see when. You see them in speedboats put up the jetty. They're not ancient yet, exactly, they're just regular. Yeah. Dan, hit us with a question there, please. Can we talk about Butler's
catfish? Absolutely. There is an holster on the live chat right now that is making comments in my name and he's made my account with my exact profile picture and he's just leaving it. But he's not leaving any like hateful comments. He's just leaving stuff that I would actually say. So real, can I give you my take on this? Please. I think you you're, you were like into AI way before the rest of us. I think attacked me. I think you cloned yourself.
I think you cloned yourself and it's escaped. And I think that's the real Aaron Butler or. Because you would do leaving comments now because it only happened to be happening when you weren't here. I think you're just fucking making an excuse for leaving comments. I don't. Know maybe I'm the clone right now. That's what I'm saying. Would Aaron Butler do CBD and melatonin? I don't know guys, but. The clone, I like what he lost dressed all in black.
Aaron Buckley, dude, he would. Do your eyes are darker? Your eyes are darker. More red at the same time, yeah. Guys, I don't know what you're talking about. Oh my God. By the way, if you do have a close, only matter of time before you guys fuck. If I do, water is refreshing. But yeah, no. So the impulsors out there, I hope we find them. You're. Going to hunt your clone down and fuck them and never leave the house. Here's a question. No.
I like where this is going. No, you're cloned, right? You're on an island with you and just your clone is it? Get a bag it go. Who? I don't think it is you. Know Father to go. I don't. I don't think it is, but I don't think I would. It's not a legally sent, but you wouldn't do. It I would bang one of your clone for no one would hear me on like I'd say my my clothes bum hole and golf that better you want to give you a new. One why would show your bum hole?
It's a mess and. What and what respect looks like elasticity or like? You know all of it, just I looked at it and gasped. It's like an old sleeping bag drawstring. It's broke. I know it's worse. It's like a sleeping bag filled with bricks. How'd you look at? It no put my phone. I mean, I've like glanced at the side the murd like we look at the. Cheeks 100%. I mean, 100%, yeah. No, you're just admitted to it and you're ridiculing me for doing. This.
Yeah, you're like. Nothing wrong with the I'm doing it for medical reasons. You'll be doing it because you're like, need more bleach on that, Yeah. You have a bomb disposal more 100% every morning. Just get away. I reckon your bombs for steam. I reckon you're pretty good minds just out too much booze over the years. I looked at it one time and it was a bad fluid. That's sad to hear. It was like, I won't show a doctor if I ever have something you can. I'll just die.
Yeah. Like you just got to leave it or show it up. There'd be another medical staff strike if I was like, there's something on my bum, yeah, like I'm not paying, but. What's going to happen when you have to get the week colonoscopy and all? That I can't wait for. Why? Because I'll have to bring in a big Russian blind fella. Why is he blind? There's a black coat. What if he pokes the wrong hole? He'd need to be blind if he pokes the wrong hole, it's only better for him.
Putting it up your arse? Yeah. Dan, we have a question, please. Not a question, but a statement, Arm Butler says. Sorry, was a way of practising pickleball there lads. That is not me. Now you know AI. Butler. No. AI Butler, come down here and join us in the couch. Two of them just. Say, well man, that's my life now. Who knows how long it's been going on for. I don't even know now am I real anymore? It's or any of this one. It's the CBD talking.
Yeah, I'm just so crazy. He's just tripping, man. Yeah. He's just tripping, probably starving on you also. Crispin Pizza. No, I'm OK. I'm fasting at the moment. I'm good. Just water. Hello you fasting for brother. Who's with the weight? Are you? I just feel better. I'm like my boy Brian here, he tells me. You should fast probably. Yeah, yeah. He'll needs for like 6 hours of the day. And the good thing is now you have a clone, you can get some blood. Yeah, that's true.
Yeah, I get a blood boy. I need a blood boy. If anyone's looking, be a blood boy. No, you would be the blood boy. No I'm not, I'm too old to be a blood boy now. I need a younger blood boy and 35 heading to 36th in April. Did the the bot man have a good time Tenerife? Had a lovely time. Are you recharged yet? Recharged, refreshed lot of new material, got written up drunk trying not to started drugs with CBD. Did anyone I? Got wanked by the Asian lady, do you hear about that?
Yeah, the Asian lady there's. No, no, no, no. This was the one of the one, this was the honour of sign and said I'm the Asian lady of Tenerife and so. Oh, just mental skilling. The I had, I was walking along the strip one evening and loads of massage places everywhere. I was like, oh, you know, I've been sitting at a desk a lot. I'll go get away massaged on the back shoulders, go in, see a lady and I was like back. Shot 1. I was like, no, well, she was on.
It was her own business. She was self-employed. Tax returns flat out today they they're getting it in, but any get. On here. Is Andrew Ryan's favourite day by the way he is salivating at the minute. Gets the. Super Bowl for him. Yeah, the the, but she I said 30 minutes back shoulders head on into the room. I'm wearing shorts and boxers because I'm just doing the back and shoulders. I'm lying on the bed. She just starts pulling the shorts off me like I'm a little
baby on the table. Like not even no respect at. All are you front face. I'm front down, vulnerable, She's very vulnerable. Short and boxers just. Well she takes shorts down 1st and then she takes the boxers and just leaves the the our sheiks hanging out. So my chi I'm like a. But at any point you could. Go park it back in. What colour box have you were? And was wearing blue. Could be sweat back there. I I wasn't, it was fine. That's OK. I'm just, I'm just thinking, well, look.
When I tell you what she was getting up to, I don't think a bit of sweat will have Yeah, put her off anyway. And she does the backrobe all good. And at the very end she's like actually finished hat me on the back and I looked up, I'm looking up on the bed and she's above me looking down at me and she's like happy ending. And she did that motion there with two hands.
And you were like, no happy end. And then I immediately went home and showered because I thought she's probably touched a lot of Dicks today and it's being spread across my back. Now, and was she offended? She did she think it was weird? You don't. Yes she a bit like yes what the hell Yes, why was the weirdo for not getting one? Because she almost assumes if you're just a single lonely guy going in to get a massage, you're looking for the wank.
See, I've never had a happy ending in a massage, right? But part of me is interested in just the mechanics. Have a sad ending because you can't get it up. Yeah, no, yeah. She pulled my shorts and saw my own. I'm like, get the fuck out of here. Why'd you get an elephant's mouth hanging under your back? But I would. Part of me is like, can I just sit in when you give somebody? Because I want to know what they want to watch, not watch for a sexual way. I just mean, is it?
Oh, what for me, Let me finish. Is it? That's what. You said, but is it just like is it like a she just like fucking with one the day or did they put a wee bit of like oh. No. I think business, I think there's a bit of showmanship. In it you would have to. Get a root, wouldn't it? I think a lot of people already have a root, yeah. That's why you've gone in. Yeah. And you know that that's going to happen. Yeah, it's like when you've got a nod in your back, the tensions
there. You needed. You needed. But a roots that you would take care of yourself. We leave those, wouldn't it? Not so I was going I want to tell a story about anyone but. I'm trying to. Be one of my Barber. I Dave Alley was already. No no no, my Barber might go to. Fuck sake. I feel like I'm going to add someone here. You're not. Say the Barber someone else goes to. The Barber Mickey goes to Across the Across the street from Mickey's barbers, there's a massage parlour.
Fuck you what? Did he say? You heard from McDonald's. I don't know what I mean. It's. Going to go. We're seeing her. That looks like a big game. I know we're not all perfect, all right? He said. I'll get my deck cut in the hospital. Barbara's like I was God intended. Yeah, go ahead. Sorry. Barbara's like what he had got cut. You're like, I'm loving them.
As he wipes special sauce off his chest, my chest, I'm usually McDonald's. So there's a massage parlour opposite the road of the barbers and apparently he has a client that goes in, gets the haircut and spends an afternoon. He's like right, just nipping over to them and gets the haircut in the wank in the afternoon team. And that's like that's like his we daddy himself as we Monday. What? Order. Do you do that? You get the right order. Haircut first. You have all her on your neck be
all itchy. I don't hang. He cars Yeah, I did. He will tell a story about there was a brothel and Lorgan right, Of course. And I, Michael and the she knew a fellow who went to it one night and he says like he was all excited. He was steaming drunk, but he was all excited. Yeah, it was. No. That's what about. I swore. Happy at steaming. That's just what The funny thing is. I'm pretty sure it was in a house that my me and my family lived in at one point.
So it does make it sound worse. But he says he went down and he was kind of like he knocked the door and he's trying to like, is there a code word? I don't know that I've never been to brothel before. And this sort of big older lady opened the door and he thought, oh, she must be like the Madam. He was like, right. And he said he was sitting in the living room. And he said, and apparently it was like a dentist waiting room was all old magazines that you wouldn't open, you couldn't open.
And there's like there's like 3 or 4 fellows just sitting sort of like, oh. My fuck. Excuse me, He said. He was waiting like fucking next guy goes, next guy goes and he's like, I'm here and I'm doing it. And he said as he was called next, he was like went out of the room and the old daily was walking down the stairs wiping her vagina with a wet wipe. Not a funny story, just interesting, right? They're not all gold. What do you think this Bonnie blue girl let's slept with 1000
guys? English class. Dirty rotten her no more. I just feel bad for number 9 #99 yeah, I mean, and the guy from the Guinness Book of World Records above his pen grid. Surely you love that job. You want to sit in the massage. That's a good. Point No, I just wanted to see once I just want to, I want to maybe I'll ask somebody who's had one done. What's it like? So what's it like? Like I'm just interested. Is there is there a bit of a show does is it sexual or is it very mechanical?
But I don't want to see some wanked off. But you but she was a bit weird. Do you after is in like? Yeah, she was like almost like a shooter took it. But then she also didn't tell me if there was a surcharge. You know what I mean? Like if there was an up sale happening, she made it sound like it was just hard to. I was. Went with the bad car with him. It went off twice. Did you buy the car? Not a question. But a statement. Mickey Bartlett says this fellow beside me is typing with his
toes. You've got the AI I've. Got you now. Oh no. I knew I shouldn't have fucking tell us about Coven. Now they're coming together. Oh. Boy, Tesla bought Bartlett. Because I got up at half four this morning travelling from Clinic Hilty. I don't know whether this is a dream I'm having in the hotel we stayed up last night or not. Just local comedian Cologne. It's all a VR. Experience It was an HP hotel when the boys what was it called? Clinic Hilty Park Hotels, is that exactly?
That's exactly the name of it. Is everything that Tonic Kildee called the clonic LD? Yes yeah. Barbers, Clonic, Kildee, Tesco. Here's what two things we know about Clonic guilty, The birth of Black Pudding and Michael Collins. That's it, pudding. Black pudding was actually Michael Collins only found thing black and Tom pudding. Nice. Thank you. That's all. No, but I'm not. That's all you need to know. I've never had a. You seem like a black pudding fellow. Always have only.
Killed the black pudding class because you can actually that with a coconut really good. I said I had one time was steaming drunk. So the fellows house and Tony Golds, that's all I have. But you just caught him with the black pudding feed me and he wiped me off. Was real weird. We had some breakfast today. I. Had some as well do. You want to describe it as a roadside feed, big feed, roll trimming, big fry. Oh yeah, we'll just get that it. Charlie's. Colonic in the Charlie.
'S Josh's Kitchen. Clock a deep fry. Emporium. It was like a lot of workmen going there and all, and that's the. Same. I thought you'd trust. That's good. Yeah. You see a high vis. High vis gear, big feed. Yeah, you're always in the middle of all the high visits. Brilliant big cooked breakfast. All the Trimmons slap. You go for a full fry up like. What was ours called Excel or something called the big Big Boy. Many sauces. It's called the Maxi Maxi Fry. 2
sauces. At least three. 3 sauces. How big the sauces? Oh fuck 11 inches. 3 sauces. 3 sauces. Too many sauces were fried sausage 3. Bacon 4 toast. That's a heart attack. There beans and black pudding. I didn't need the black pudding but I didn't finish shipping 2 post eggs. Did you get your bread replaced with the gluten free stuff? I went, then no I judged, I went then I would. They won't have any
replacements. Didn't say in the menu but gluten free or anything I go. I go excuse me, I have a clinically bad tummy. I said, do you used to gluten free toast? You probably don't. And she went yes, Russian lady thing and folk remember she's like yes. I said do you do almond milk? Yes, fucking water. Water. It's great for you. I'm telling you, it's going to be a good day. Yeah, congratulations. It's a great one. What'd you just have for
breakfast? Do you and I have been having for breakfast something that you would love? Yeah. I wish. I wish sardo seeded bread so we not in seed. Sardo bread, almond butter with sliced apple on it. Toasted. Sorry, toasted bread. Don't. Sliced apple. You like sliced apple? Like Apple. I don't like it on like. On toast? Really. Apple on toast. Although it's a wee Golden Delicious one, it's good, no? That's weird. You can. Have like. Lady on toast.
Toast, Yeah. Royal garlic no. You can have, I would sometimes have banana, but then I've been putting a bit of apple in there too and I'm spicing it up a little bit. I'm just guys, life's an adventure. Spicy apple India. Not really, not my type. Dan, any other comments jumping out there? Our McCann says. Wish I was there. Guys. This is out. Of there's something not right in the multiverse here. We all know our McCann can't
type. We get an update from Butler on the Jake Paul. Logan Paul What? Would you like to know? So I told you, I said. I saw on the Internet they're going to fight. By the way, we need to start putting fake news people on you. We need to, we need to start fact checking. You're becoming the new Joe Rogan. You. Said you said your granny. You said Bernie Sanders was supporting Trump earlier. No, I think there. Was I knew that was actually, it
was absolutely. I think there was a point where Trump obviously got the nomination and Sanders was like, yeah, vote for him because he was, he was being a party man. No, Bernie's party party he would have voted come out. Bernie didn't stand up the inauguration. He's like fuck that orange fuck or something. Was he here? Yeah, he didn't get by Trump. Yeah, but yeah, so that's anyway Jake Paul, Logan Paul, what do you want to? Fight. Nope. Really.
They have a documentary series coming out on HBO Max, and that's what they're promoting. You can look up the trailer. For it right now, do you think they will fight? Nope, no, not well. Here's saying it can't, it may be unlike depends on a different sort of such factors #1 how much money can they make is the biggest one.
Obviously like say some Indian family like that was trying to offer McGregor and Logan Paul a bunch of like, I think there was talk of like a billion getting thrown about. That's how like if something like that's getting thrown about, you'd maybe have a spar of your brother, you know what I mean? So. We'll have a brother. Fuck. I'm your brother, buddy. My sister go for a fight. Yeah, so there's that. But no, for the minute it was just a big promo hype pace that fooled you.
But I think I was saying the other day that like that world I think needs that kind of fight because I all interest is being lost and that. There's just not that many big fights to happen. You've got people like KSI, Jake and Logan who are like the three big hitters in that sort of area, and then beneath that there's not really that much else. So that jerk is simple. Oh yeah, you should get on a misfits card. Let's campaign to get Yeah on Misfits. Why don't? You do misfits.
Misfits is the big social media experiencer box and Ram by KSI. But he has like you know, he has comedians already had who he had fucking. What's his name? Double laughs. Yes, yet double laughs. Fighting him. I think he was talking about it, but I don't. Know there was chat about that, some .1 there, but yeah I think why not you would like to do something like that. No, I will. Hold on, make make. I'm throwing I. Wouldn't want to fight my friends.
Make I'm throwing a hypothetical your way, right? Misfits Boxing. Right. London. Right. The trilogy, right? You and party, the trilogy thought. Once. You got to fight twice in one night. OK, You didn't hear me. So you're going to swap shorts? Yeah, so they have an order or. People want to hear it the the rematch. No, I only like the idea of doing it for charity. I don't like the idea of fighting. You can donate. Your purse to charity. I'm not giving them a purse or
money. That's called the wallet. 15 G's. No, only if it's for a good 'cause I will. You could get the 15 G's do a good cause. You can both agree to do that beforehand I. Suppose. I do. You think real like you know. Why I don't think they would have me and buddy on a bit of who I do. Honestly they might because they don't just do like a big card, they'll do like smaller cards,
they'll do regional cards. I think they did one in Ireland last year, the case I was meant to fight on but then pulled out at the last minute. So they do have room for like people from different areas. Like we could be like doing things, we could get this, we could get this. We might be able to get something lit here. Would you, would you go 50? Are you happy to go 5050 on the perf before we start negotiations? No, but then his cards being in my purse, my cards being his purse. Bill.
That's right. Have to go to shop together or not. We'll live in different areas. Yeah, this could be it could be something. Like I think we clipped this sounded because I tell them we got a fight from Senator who's man's tailor. Well, I'm I'm a prime gainer. We. Prime, we've got her in. Did I tell you what this you did tell me about this? You were showing me the merch that we're going to get soon. I'm going to have. Primer like listen, welcome to the team, really, this guy said.
Or send me a little stop, but I haven't. There's no sound. Prime athlete. I'm prime athlete. There's prime sand. As in prime is in the. The energy drink. I'm a 5K park run prime athlete. Yeah, I'm a pickleball prime athlete. I'm couch the 5K but I haven't done the 5K yet. Creative Couch. This could be. Pro Culture. Look, Stranger things happened. Absolutely. I I, I do you know what I think we look ahead at what the schedule of misfits in throughout the year and see what
cars. When we want to see you done with the box. Never. I seen you hit the heavy bag one time. Never. The girl didn't ask for it. No. I had formed. I saw you. You're locked on your head. We haven't. Tell him what I told Shane before all of this started was see the dead and Shane knows like, and you know as well you lose your life to it like well, fuck it, it's like. I drank the whole time.
I know that we were in Australia and stuff, it was different, but you were fucking, you're infrared sauna, all this. You were doing everything like, you know what I mean, so I don't. Think that part of it helped me much, but you're right out the the the dedication to it is is a lot. Yeah, I need to get Bird stand up, not boxing. But when you're a job guy. True. Actually, yeah. You know, you get on the road, yeah, you've been caught. You're not Maddy. Yeah.
That's why people. Won't fight you. You're not Maddy. Look. Yeah. Every time you see a tricolour to fight, we'll get that off your foot. Do I message KSI on Instagram? Message him or Mom's Taylor. Message Mom's Taylor. Do I have to do this right now? Mom's Taylor is K. This is the food. Like I'm in school. Like fight him at lunchtime. Well, you don't. Have to agree you can fucking just say no. It's. A. Humorous. For now, all. Right, what to do with
everything food? Fantastic, let's get him a fight. What do I say here? Do I go? Just go. I'm on the podcast right now. Just go. Would there be space on a card later in the year for a comedian boxer to take place? Boxer comedy. Some show. Thank you Mickey Bartlett in the comments. Oh, you're back. I'll put Patty in a worse chokehold than Roy Keane. I can't believe you said that. I hope I'm shockingly. You are. That's she's actually he's got some balls on hey. Hey I use.
Just by the way, I found a very black pubic hair in my chest are. You sure it wasn't just the jumper? No, it was a black pubic hair. I just found it, sorry. That's all good. I don't. Want to mind the waves are in motion here? Now we've got to speak to Patty and make sure he's OK with this, but. I'd say Patty. Bill, he's up for a fight. He's up for a fight. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What you are? Not that I've said not nobody else's. Do not feel a wee bit silly.
But imagine you get good exposure. From it I don't give a fuck about exposure. And everybody will. Go. I know you don't just try and sell, but the exposure. Won't have exposable bomb the doctor. It's going to be wise. Imagine we get this over the line. You still have to win the promoting we no problem. We're ready. We're yeah, we're the fucking. We're Eddie 1 is going to have the high party wasn't have the hype. He knows you get the masseuse from Tenerife, you be fucked.
You be 9 stone for the fight. Oh. Yeah, true. Every time you. Get a massage, Willies. We'll get you, yeah, but we'll get you all those lymphatic massages of. People, I don't want a limp one, yeah. No. They want a hard fattick. Dan is for the comment there please. So Mark says going back to stars and rise before Christmas, he was a guys. At all. This isn't about. You. Hey, Iron Butler. Hurry, hurry. Hey Iron Butler, get the down here comment. Code Red. Code Red.
There's a bit of a commotion going on in the hall. Thought it maybe she had turned. It turned out to be there, but it was Dennis. Oh. Could he be a surprise singer in the next one? Hold on. Something's happened. He's right beside it. Just there's. Just don't. Right. And a long week boy. So the dance in there, anytime Dennis shows up the. My dad. I can't find my legs. Before. But foreskins become a nose skin. You don't like Corpus. The foreskin.
My dad, I don't know, said this in the pod. Don't know if he's wrong, but my dad was chatting to something like a week or two ago and in a particular conversation he said he's like, I'm raging. What's wrong with eagles? I've walked up Royal Ave 4 times here and I was going to be lost something. He goes Nah no one stopped me. He's just down there about the city centre waiting for a photo.
My my, this is a funny story. My sister, my nephew, there's, they're having a grandparent stay in school today and my sister has told my dad that the teacher goes around the classroom with a microphone. And I asked all the grandparents a question, right? My dad was really, really fucking shy person and it just sent me a photo of him and my mom walking up to the school. He's about 10 feet from my mind. We'll talk just like I can't wait to get home. Bring your grandparents to school.
That's a weird one to have, isn't it? Must. Be shy if you don't have any grandparents who does. You bring just the urn. Bring a. Photo of a grave. But yet Dennis brings quite the show with him. Anytime he goes a gig, he brings the hype. Like, yeah, you know. Just getting people to punch. Him. I'd always imagine Dennis turn up with an entourage of like sexy bitches. Yeah. Oh, he would love to. He would be keen. The HRT crew. Yeah, he's like Bernie Eccles. Formula, yeah.
He's like. Good for him. Stars and rides will be out in the future. I said that Fausty work power like that much as hair came back, brother. Two sides of Turkey. Would you ever consider getting the? Old time spot 100% are you if I if I had the money would. You do have the money, I don't. You do. Absolutely. Expensive. No. Man, they pay you these. Make you. I wouldn't. I don't know if I'd go to Turkey, I would do it here. You won't do it. Here's a bit more pricey.
In the studio, Pedro. That'll be I do the. Surgery. I love that. But you can do it as a monthly payment, you don't have to pay it all. I wouldn't. Put it in one bit of the time. I don't do that. Every month you get. A We pitch, aren't you know a lot about it. I know loads about my friends and stuff that have got it done. Oh, I I. No, I'm good. I haven't had it done. I swear I haven't no sort of thing. You can have that, I know. Look.
You're like there's multi payment you pay 4999 a month yeah you start a personal plan yeah I. Turn up as a clone of Iron Butler being like do. You think it'll evolve to the point where like, because that's the thing, people get it done. There's so long in between and it's a small price to pay because then you get a header, you get confidence back, blah blah, but it feels like there's an in between. Period.
That would be looks ridiculous. And you have to sleep setting up I. Do yeah, for like the first two weeks, I think. Ah fuck God. You have to, they give you like a wee pillow and you just have to sleep like that. I couldn't do it. I have to sleep my belly right to keep out base in check. What we're getting? More of the systems the the glue almonds again. I just feel stupid. I think I would I would ever take my week through asses.
Yeah, probably the clue I maybe. Just go ball and buy a hat. A bit cheaper, yeah. That is the. But weirdly, you go to Turkey to buy the hat. Yeah, yeah, there 350. Don had us for the commentary. Laura wants to know Butler, when are you going to do a tour? Windsor Motion winds are in motion the next month or two. I'm starting to plan stuff and starting to look ahead. I think maybe October. What do you see when you look ahead? What's what's that? What's that in the? What's in the distance?
Where's your name and lights? I see potentially one or two big shows in Belfast followed by small little regional shows, maybe in the likes of a dairy, you know, Antro, something like that. Yeah. But the show I'm doing with the city, yeah. No dairy. Yeah, small. I'm not saying dairies. Put a ball eclair and say you get free beads with every ticket. Yeah, it's. A good point. Yeah, fuck, it'll be. Go to It'll be the biggest show.
Go to the vibrators. Go. Like a Nokia 3330. So yeah, that's, that's the plan. And then, yeah, we'll see what happens. But I'm I'm slowly what, slowly working it all out. Yeah, one man band. You know, traffic. Aaron Butler. I don't know what to call the show. Don't call she's. I've got a great name for my show this year. OK. Do you don't want to reveal? It don't worry, OK, Just in case that there's actually shape. OK. Vasectomy vasecti you it's. Not bad.
That's not bad, actually. It's not bad. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think the penis show. The penis show. Yeah, yeah, that'll be, that'll Mark happy and might be happy and then might be good. Yeah, it could be good actually. Happy and is not bad. I like that, yeah. You have any drops bro? Jones and Baby. Oh yeah, that's good. Yeah. So yeah, things are happening well. Aren't under Moonwalker. Yeah. I love that you give the vaguest answer of all time is you going to tour?
You're like there's things coming ahead. It'll that will be. I've not only announced so I've not been in solid dates or anything like that, but but stuff is hopefully. You're announcing an announcement. There you go, you're. Teasing an announcement. T and four planet out of them, you know. Dan has something else, please. Chris says hi from South Florida. Oh, hi, Chris. Good. I might. Very good. Now where's South Florida? Below North Florida I was called
the Republic of Florida would. It be like Miami. Now be your army, yeah? Miami's dead. Grandparents Day. Where's Uganda bride with head McGowan? So. What you found a more Florida troops but man. Not. Where does he prefer these days? Well. Here's the thing about Florida at the minute. They're opening a new theme park for Universal Studios in May, so it's going to be very busy this year, so I need the time. It's just right.
So I might have to wait a week. I might go next year once a. Little bit the violence stocked up with sweets now. This guy knows. So yeah, I. Remember being the theme park now? Never. No. Man was that a Holocaust theme one on I switch. The train was good, but the rest of it was shite shite. Tragic Kingdom. More pursues. Fucking hell. Heisenberg and says he wants to clarify and apologise. He made the first Butler a a comment and account, but none of the others.
Oh, so there's multiples? Now. Oh no. It's like coffee. The Butler verse. Guys, they're breeding. It's like whack a mole. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you. Shut down a few more pop up. They're gremlins. Everything you pour water, that's a hard. Life, you pick one out and there's loads more down. There. That's where you're working on a horror movie. Yeah. Just like I'm living it. You do one AI Butler clone, but he starts, he clones himself and then that person and then more
and more. The trailer for that movie is like you pick the phone up as you talking to you and you're all. Yeah. Is this a? Movie and then it ends in a big orgy. Yeah. And like the SSE, it's up, yeah. It's just loads of you getting happy Emmons of other ones. Are you like the? Human centipede. They're all in like a wee circle, doing each other like a wee circle. That's class. Just 45 TV's with my big cock
off Yeah mine. The lighters, the I went and seen the Michael Jackson musical this week. And you were in London? In London. Yeah, yeah. What was that, Joe? James Michael Jackson. A guy what's his name? Don't know his name, but here's the is he any good? Spooky thing is, yes, he is the the noise bad. That's good. But he sounded just like him, like he talked like him. As freaky. Oh my gosh. Yeah, yeah. That's Kevin or Kevin. Oh my gosh, why are you in my dressing? Room.
Oh my gosh. I'm going to walk backwards. Oh my God, can. We phone. Can we phone security? But yeah, and they have Joe Jackson in the play who is very abusive to Michael and says the phrase, I'm going to beat your black ass a lot. And that was like, jokes on you, I'm right. Now do. They deal with Jacko being a nonce. Nope. That'll be a weird musical like. Funny enough, they. The musical. Funny about it.
Musical. There is musical goes the musical goes way up to 1992 right before the 1st allegation. Right before Home Alone 2 came out. Was. It was it good? Was it genuinely very good? It was good, the music was really good. I wouldn't go rush back to it again but it was good to see as a one off. But yeah, bubbles up. No, no, unfortunately not. Couldn't get. I was only ever interested in the monkey. Monkey. That's Michael Jackson, OK. Bring me monkey. Yeah. It's fun.
Johnny Ben, He's a comedian. That's good. Any other musical scene recently? How do you want to see? What do you want to see? I want to see. Well, I've seen the Wicked movie. Have you seen the Wicked movie? We wouldn't watch it. I don't think it would transfer well to the screen. Have you seen the actual show? Twice cred, second. Wow. OK, very much. Do you know what? That's why. I wasn't moved, it was 74, part of the whole. Shit, you remembered. You've seen it before. Fucking.
So I haven't seen the stage show and I watched it. That's why I watched the movie and I went, I don't know how that translates to the stage because. The stage is the stage was brilliant. It's fucking brilliant. I have to say I enjoyed it. I loved. I thought it was very, very good. I love the fact, by the way, that you've 1993 cinema metre I've been doing the whole time we're doing some. Popcorn. Hello. Cockle being it. Yeah. What musicals would I like to
see? What musicals would you like to see based on something that haven't been made? Well, they do like Jersey Boys and I want. Jokes of Fritzl the music. Going underground, I'm going to take. Daddy chain me to a radiator. Yeah, I'll be fucking. The. Musical. Yeah. I'm Doctor Harold Shipman, the musical. Oh, they come. A doctor feel good? I'm going to take my bags on to see Lion King, I think. That's nice. Over in London, that's a wholesome. Time I thought New York was
fucking. Brilliant. Yeah, they've just brought Hercules out. That's the next Disney musical. It's in West End now. You know what? Not like Hercules. I. Wouldn't mind seeing the Matilda 1 Tim mentioned. Apparently it is fantastic. It's really, really good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's a good one. Yeah. Get my hair piece on the West End. That'd be great. They need to do out in the Opera House. Why don't that?
That would be to do. No, but like a musical version of give my headpiece on. Oh yeah. And like, I don't know what. Why you're moving? But what was? It there was a musical here there. Was a musical here based on something like they were meant to do a father, they were meant to do a Father Ted musical, but then all the trance stuff happened and he got it, got cancelled. There was they had the full thing written and it was about to like do auditions and stuff and then they couldn't.
Get someone to play Mr Doyle. Nice, nice, nice. Is it mad that he doesn't like trans people that he wrote a whole show about Price on an island? He's hiding something. My alarm went off there. SSE Arena, 23rd of May. The Musical. Tickets on tickets. With me. Yeah, I get AI that it somewhere just. Almost me in it some. Songs if you in it. Oh, what's the song with? One of the lyrics is me. Oh, chorus. What is the song that says me? I just probably all do it. I'm going.
To replace it with. Me Hi. I'm the problem. It's me. It's T Hi. It's lovely. Yeah, so make your special tip and solo. Yep, solo tomorrow, so no point. Gosh, gosh. Golly any anything else? Do you want to plug a promote? No, I'm announcing things in the future looks like. Hey, I saw Mike, we all are in the future. Yeah, some point, but for. Me. I'll do it for me. The botman?
Anything. Funny enough, my panel show was out on Saturday on Radio Ulster. I've not heard the edit of it but from what I've been told a lot of stuff's being cut so enjoy that. Goes out on air and then on iPlayer as well. It's on BBC Sounds. I think Ank, the sounds version is a bit more risk, a bit more risque. So if you're going to listen to it, maybe go there. That's probably the. Best 27 content, Yeah, yeah, that's just a model. We'll we'll, we'll share that. We'll share that.
Lovely. I mean, it'll never happen again, but that sorry, they told me, yeah. Guys, thank you very much for watching and listening this week. We appreciate it. Patreon. Patreon.com/T with me podcast We do a yeah, probably a. Thursday. And you can watch the podcast that me, Mickey and Willie did live from the Waterfront Hall from NR that comes out in one hour time at 3:00. And that we've still got the episode with Dave and Andrew to go up Stars in your eyes.
And that's not to say that thousands of hours of stuff that's already there go well, everybody have a great weekend. We did it. We did it. Round of applause to say so.