Just been running. What it do, what it do, what it do? It is your boy Andrew Schultz AKA Mr. Goody 2 Shoes AKA the Irish Elvis. Who am I with? As always Joseph Huggins AKA old man Huggy. Talk shit or get off the pod. Episode 190, No title. Oh, I labeled it Grand Theft la Boo Boo. Oh, I didn't see that. That's. Why? I, I, I, I didn't put, I put it everywhere else. There's been a clusterfuck of a couple of days. So yeah, but I labeled it Grand Theft la Boo Boo.
Welcome, motherfuckers. How you doing man? Dude, my life, I'm telling you is crazy. Just AC like how your boy like goes from like the like just riding the roller coaster life. Everybody knows who listens to the podcast like and I was like heartbroken for a couple of months or whatever and now it's like, holy shit, dude. Like I'm just crushing of rushing life. That's good, man. Well, congratulations to you. Thank you. It's always good when you can
take a second. Sometimes you need low points to make you appreciate the highs. Everything's ebbs and flows and highs and lows. But you know you, like I said before, as you put yourself in a great position in so many other aspects, don't hyper fixate on this one because this one in the long run could potentially be holding you back from other good
shit. So. Fuck, it definitely was definitely was like, well, I don't know if it was holding me back, but like it just like at the same time as good shit was happening, that shit happened and and and then it's just like your boys on the heater right now. Heater dropping hits, new job hanging out was like cool cool cool cool women. Well, that's good. Well, just leave it at that. We're just, we're all very happy for you. I'll give you a cheer right now. A cheer and a clap.
Thank you. I appreciate that. Well that's good man, I'm glad to hear that everything seems to be going better. Positive vibes only. That's right, positive vibes tribe. We want to put out positive vibes because the world creates enough negative vibes for us. We don't really have to put any more effort into that. It will do it for you. That's right. I tell people that all the time. Life's about balance and sometimes it'll give it to you
whether you ask for it or not. It'll be like, hey, hold on, I'm going to balance you the fuck out for one second. Well, you know, what's funny is, is, is like, that's like the first thing I told my sales team, because like, I'm running a sales and marketing team now is don't get too high. Don't get too low because somebody will just hang up on you and then you'll drop $20,000 like 10 minutes later. And you can't ride the fucking roller coaster because because
you'll just die. Like you just got to just like things are going to happen, like where it's bad and things are going to happen where it's really fucking good. Yeah, yeah. I mean, yeah, I not just because of played it, but corner is a great example. I use that for like the teams that I'll manage and I tell them like, look, man, like when you are like if they played football or knew anything about it, I'm like, dude, you're out there, you get scorched for like a 60 yard bomb.
There is a field goal, there is a kickoff and you are back the fuck out there covering the same dude that just scorched you. And if you're worried about how he beat you last time, you're he's going to beat you again. You just got to get the fuck over it. Short term memory on the mistakes that we make, long term memory on the lessons we learn
from those mistakes. That's what you want to last is your your perspective or your perception of the situation should grow because of the because of that fuck up or because of that hang up. But at the end of the day, like you can't just focus on that one hang up bro, because then you're going to get happening. If you do, everyone will hang up
on you. But. But even even but like the also the point is like, if you torch somebody, don't don't like just type like you got to like realize like you have to do it again. That's what I'm saying. No, I hear you man. I hear you. Well, I'm doing good. Thanks for asking. Oh, sorry. Obviously I have more stuff set up so I have the lights on, but also just kind. Of like, you're talking about
your house, right? Yeah, well, in like my office space, like I have like stuff shit on the walls, my shelf. There's no clothes anywhere. It's been just like a process actually. I built your boy. I've been going crazy with the landscaping and I built I think I sent you a picture of it. Yeah. No, you did. Well, I know. I just the audience doesn't know. OK, well so there's this spot on the side of my house where I got this huge mega fence put in, but it's like Dead Space.
Nothing grows there. I've had to like dig out and chop out these stumps that were hella deep in the ground like but I levelled it out and I put put in my own stone path like pavers I guess, but I did big grey ones and then it's all white marble that matches the white marble that I did up front. So it looks good like it like I've done. It it does, I saw the. Picture it does like there's time. I have two French drains that I built and put into it.
So on the front of the footpath, in the back of the footpath, I put in some PVC piping with drainage and then that runs out to the yard so it won't ever flood. If it ever gets higher than the rocks, it drains out into the grass. But I mean, it looks like I fucking paid somebody to do it. And it's wild because I've never done it before and I'm really fucking winging it. And but I'm just like determined to do it. So there's times where I like forget that I did, I walked by.
I'm like, that looks really fucking good. Like I send it to that you pictures or other people that you know. I don't really share a lot of the stuff that I'm doing here. I talk about it more on the pod. Barely even text me. Or dude, I'll be grinding. We both be. Grinding.
No, I know. I. Know but and like I'm on my phone 99% of my day with work it's very fucking frustrating it's fun it's fun but I sent you but I sent you pictures because I was like hey like if it looked like shit you'd probably tell me and be like hey like this looks really good right like I didn't fuck this up 'cause that's like. No, no, no, no. It looked good. It looked good. Yeah. I thought I got late to you. Like back on like telling you that it looked good. Oh you're fine.
I would do. We're both busy. We both like run. Large groups for work. And like I would say, like, you know, people are always asking me to do stuff for him or need something and it's all urgency for other people that I'm like, but I'm not working. No, no, no, you don't have to apologize. Just. Crash out, sleep well.
You got to guilt me. No, no, no, I just, I'm just letting people know that like even when like it's like him and I are like best friends like it's, it's like your boy might not get a tax back unless it's urgent. Well, obviously, I mean, if there's some shit going down, I. Would Right, right, right. You're on point. What? I'm doing but like if it's but if it's just. Random random shit like. You're sending me some random screenshot that's like to the
moon and back. I'm like and I'm like balls deep and a bunch of work stuff. Like that? No, I know, I know. I. Know I'm just, you know, I got your back. I got your back. I got you. But so that was so that's been super awesome and rewarding. I'm totally become that old man that like looks at his grass when it's about to rain. I'm like, please let it rain so it could water my yard. Like I've become that person. But I've always been really, I enjoy challenges.
I think I've talked about it fuck for forever on this podcast where it's like, you should be challenging yourself and shit. That's not your day-to-day. That is very difficult. That will test your mental fortitude because most of our lives are comfortability at this point. And that's that's really what this been is. It's just like, dude, I mean, I showed you before and after pictures and it's like fucking wild, Like it's like it was a
like I'm not even a jungle. If we should do a daytime pod because like my yards, just right out this window is a huge fucking window, but it's pitch black, but it's just like a big open empty space. I'm going to put stuff back there and do more. But I've started like close to the house and like I'm working my way out, but it's been the transformation. My real estate guy who helped me get the house is like fucking baffled. He's like, dude, this looks insane.
I'm like, I know, right? And I was kind of cool with the guy that I bought it from. He was like a flipper. And I think if I haven't sent him any pictures, because if I did, I think he'd be pissed. Because because of how good it is. Because it looks good, because it already appraised more than what I paid for it. Because he never got an appraisal done. So he just like threw it on the market. That's what he. Said though though.
No, there was no, no like I had to pay to get one done because there was not one done. Like it was like. That's part of the. Like like part like whenever you had said that, like I just didn't trust him, I was like. No, like, I have that. So I'd have the county come out and they were like, Oh yeah. But we'd already agreed to terms. That was part of the close. So we, they would have to go back and renegotiate.
That's why whenever I wanted to get repairs done on a couple things, they basically were like, look, we'll do these two things and then that's it. Because if you wanted, if you want the house and you want more than those two things fixed, we're going to have to renegotiate the price basically being like this motherfucker. And I was like, I want a new water heater, got it. And I want a brand new water heater. I want them to fix the chimney.
The chimney had some cracks in the mortar, so they redid the inside of that. They did that and they were like, that's all we're fucking doing. Because I, and now it and then I then I find all the thousands of dollars of stones buried in all this jungle weeds and stuff. Like I'd be pissed if it was me. I'd be fucking pissed. But he was cool. He was like some Rastafarian former reggae singer turned house flipper. And like I follow him on Spotify.
He's got songs with millions of plays, so he like showed up and he was like a white guy, like super rosted the fuck out he was. Bullshit. He used to and on his Spotify did he cut them all off? He's like I, he's like, I cut him off doing this job touring. Let like I'm trying to like transition out of that 'cause I have kids, family, I'm trying to be more stateside. But he would do like shows in Africa and shit. Like he was showing me all these pictures.
He was cool as fuck all. Right, so like your boy went to a so you know the band tool. Yeah. Oh yeah. OK so Maynard from Tool has a side project called Pussifier. Pussifer I should say like Lucifer. But Pussifer. Private Show just released a new album. Got tickets, went and watched it at Exchange LA last night. Fucking amazing. Crazy shit. And then I went to dinner, but one of the girls who were at the dinner is like a birthday. She had dreads.
And then she was like deeply describing like how she gets the dreads. And I had no idea. I just thought like you just, it just happens. Like if you just let it happen. But she was like telling us the process of like how it works, you know, how she has to like lock them and do all this shit and. Oh yeah, that's funny. Crazy. Yeah, I had no fucking clue. I was like, I was so interested. I was like, wait, what? I used to work with this guy.
He was a manager when I waited tables at Trudy's Town in Austin and his name was Mikey. He was cool as fuck, bro. I loved Mikey and he had dreads, like down to his fucking knees, dude. It was crazy. And they were so long. And when I would go hang out, we would, he lived kind of around the corner for me. So I'd go over there, chill, we'd like to smoke out whatever, drink some beers and he would like. Would he wash them? The process of him like washing
them, drying them, it was crazy. He would have to. He would wash them and wring them out and then he would lay out in the sun and just like spread them out. It was like these like octopus tendrils. It was fucking crazy looking because he would have to sit there until it dried and if he didn't he'd get like mildew and fungus for growing. Yeah, it's it's fun.
Crazy. It's weird because I thought, like it was like the whole thing of dreads was like, you just didn't do shit with your hair and just let it do that because I'm a white. I'm a white guy. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. You know, so that this guy had some really long dreads used to. And then we, I met because he was fixing something after we'd already bought the house. So like, that's how we crossed paths.
And he ended up being pretty chill because he showed up with his construction team with all these Hispanic guys and I speak pretty damn good Spanish. And they were like, what the fuck? And he was like, what the fuck? And I could talk to them just as good if not better than he could. So when they were talking about where stuff was like they realized I understood them. It was actually kind of tight. And then he ended up hanging out just talking to me. No that.
Soft flex. No, it's tight because most people don't. I mean, I'm in Texas and it's probably just ignorance and kind of like, I don't know, like stereotypical like social norms, but like black, black guys speaking Spanish is not commonplace. Obviously. So the IT catches them off
guard. So there's time for oh, like if I wanted to talk shit right now like I normally do in front of people because they don't speak Spanish, I can't do that right now because this motherfucker knows exactly what I'm saying. So it's like one of those, you know what I'm saying?
Like you catch a kid stealing candy and you're not going to tell him, but he's like 00 and you're like, and then you just kind of let it. I was in HR the other day like trying to get my bank account information right because your boy just got on boarded and they spoke like in Armenian like the CEO in HR in front of me and I was like what the fuck y'all just say you know? It was like obviously about me. You got to get those headphones that translate in real time
they. Have those, but it's like, but it's like you're only speaking in Armenian because you don't want me to know what I'm what you're saying. Like, so it's just like, I was like, what the what the fuck is that? True, Yeah, yeah, it's like pretty obvious I. Know. So there's some to all rattle off like a paragraph in Spanish, like work related, asking for something or giving directions
and looking for something. It's so specific that if they're not used to it or they don't know it, like kept they're like what what Like what the fuck? I could make some pause for a second and I'm always asking like how to say stuff, but half of the time it's like stupid shit.
I'm asking how to say something really dumb, but I could say some pretty wild shit that's like not like out of bounds or inappropriate, but it's super funny that like they get that other people wouldn't get so I can be in the inside jokes. It's great. It's great. Too bad it failed. Failed Spanish. You loved it. Miss Denny, you'd be proud. Miss Vendetti, how at your boy? Miss Puezo Fuertes. Miss Richardson? No. Miss Armstrong. Is that Armstrong?
Yeah, yeah. Stole, stole one of her tests in Spanish, too, off her desk, got the homie to fill it out, and then sold the answers for $20 apiece to people so they had the answers to the test when they took it. The boy's not going to get Spanish. I heard about that. Actually. I'm ever hearing about that through the Grapevine that allegedly you did. No, not allegedly. No, I know, but allegedly you did.
There's a couple times where like I thought it was funny that I was getting called down to be like a character witness for you on some super shit and I'm like y'all are calling me down like I'm some credible fucking witness. Like I was just down here like 3 days ago because. I was out here like stealing. Because we, because we hid somebody's fucking $200 Iverson's in the ceiling tiles.
Like what are you talking about? And that was September 11th, 2001. This is when I was in the office for that, which I've told that story before many times. But people like where were you? I was like, oh, I was in trouble. Your boy, your boy, your boy was in trouble. But. Because of me. Not that that was me and Johnny Nelson we still met Matt Moody's at, but there's times where I got called down for you. Because I was like, I don't remember that. Or that time we the bell rang
and we all walked out of the. No, no, no, I get that part. Tech, Tech Ed and they had like Ted, Ted, like 12 of us in a conference room. They were like, bro, guys. We were like, I don't know, We just fucking got up and walked out and then we had to go back like. Someone someone on this podcast might have started that fire. Oh well, that was the that was a different fire. This one was whatever. We just walked out of class. We had Tech Ed and we had some substitute teacher.
Oh, that's right, that's right. That's. Right. And then it was like I was in. Computer arts whenever I walked out on that class. Everybody left the classroom. Nobody stayed. And it was not just like, I mean, we had a pretty rowdy class. We had like P Thorn Seawolf, we had baleen. We had a wild like that's a. We're just, we're just name dropping people. Well, I just, I kept them short. No, I agree.
I agree, but. We had, but we had like a a plethora of people that you would not want to have like in the same room together, same bus, same group on a field trip, like guys and girls. And then there was people who had who were just the homies. Like our grade was kind of tight. Everyone was homies. I agree. The nerds. 20th anniversary coming up, like it's going to be super fun.
And they weren't even necessarily nerds, but there's so many people that just got up and walked the fuck out that when they had us all in the office, like a conference room office, y'all, they had a whole entire class in the conference room office being like, what the fuck are y'all doing? And they wanted to like, RIP my head off you, your usual suspects. They were like fucking Schultz, fucking Huggins. But then they're like, you know,
random. This is not a name, but like a made-up name like Johnson, what are you doing in here? Like, you know better? What did they get you to do it? They're like, Nah, man, I just like wanted to fucking leave class. It was the craziest shit we got in 0. Trouble also also also the tech Ed teacher had rumors that he had like porn stashed like in a closet which wasn't true. But he was off, so he was a substitute teacher. So he got set.
Because it was, it was the bell. It was the bell for like the the grade below us to get out of class and not our class. We just acted like it was ours. She was like, oh, that was a really short class period. We were like, Oh yeah, it's real quick, like. Right, because they joined our junior high with like, I mean we ran like they joined the high school with the junior high is what happened. So it was like 7th, 8th, 9th, 10th grade. And so like high school was different than 10th and 8th.
Yeah, they Sprint. We sprinted out of that classroom and then they didn't do shit to us. They're like just don't ever do this again because they couldn't send us all to in school suspension. You know, there's a limit to that. Now you can only put someone into in school suspension. For like a week. I have no idea what's going on with schools right now. It's. All. It's like you just hear like bullshit like, and it's like, is that really happening or, or
people are just stupid? And then I realized like all of the parents are like our age. And it's like, how are we the ones acting crazy? You know, I thought it was Boomers. Oh no, they they just put a limit. No, I know. I know what you're saying. I'm just. Before they could have like 28 days there. There would be no limit, no fucking limit when we were like. That was like, fucking dude. It was that was crazy.
It was like your boy got locked up using the hole and your and you go like lunch and like look in the window and they'd be at their desk and they'd look up and coach pray there and be like get out of here. And you're like, oh shit, the the one black coach and they don't even let you coach the men's basketball team. But Coach Prather was the shit. He was a baller. I'm just saying. No. OK. OK, good point. He was a Hooper, he could hoop
the other basketball coach. They wouldn't have hooped him hoop for shit I I bet. OK y'all, there'll be questions. Don't doubt. Shout out Coach Prather. The shoe game was on point too. Dude. He always had some sick ass JS. Well. Mr. Goody 2 Shoes is out here for that for sure dude. He was probably crushing it back in the day. Like I don't even think about it. Probably he was crushing it. Slamming.
Slamming it at that. I'm telling you, I now that I think about it, like in the moment, I'm getting more excited about how hard that dude was crushing it. Because, you know, he was, there's no doubt. He was so unassuming and quiet, bro Coach Prather was like piping everyone. There's no. Doubt, of course. Well, not in the high school, not in the high. School. No, I know, just saying like he. Was just just out there in.
General like he was just out. I'm sure they're like, hey, coach Prather, he's like hey, he just says in school suspension. That's why he's in there because he's trying to protect himself from on the bitches outside. So he's like now y'all look, I'm going to do I'm going to do in school suspension. Don't look in the window back up. I'm going to take him to lunch when nobody else is in the lunchroom. Just just to say what? I'm the exact same way. OK.
I hung out with him on 9/11. Like I'll, I'll just say it, dude, something, something happened with one of my employees and I just happened to run into her like coming into the office and it was like inappropriate, like what happened? And I called the meeting with her and she ended up quitting. I like walked her to her car like crazy crazy. She was just like, I just have too much self respect for my like to deal with this bullshit. And it was just like I'm in Week 2.
Like, oh, now I'm in week 3. But like, it's like, damn. Like first day on the job, you feel like, Oh yeah, you felt like. I was just like, how? Like, like I just wanted her to be like, now I feel weird at work, but like I thought and she was like one of the best sales people on my team and it was just like, fuck, like this happened to her and then this and then she's leaving. Damn. Yeah, well, it's the end of the
TQS. There'd be question #1 would you rather every time you laugh you float 6 inches off the ground, or every time you cry it rains for 5 minutes? I mean every time you laugh you float 6 inches off the ground. That'd be tight as fuck. They'd be very self-serving. But people be like oh shit. So you could like play basketball and jump and then start to laugh and get another 6 inches on your vert. They'd be like every time he's dunking on people he's just laughing and like that would be
cool. But I do feel like every time you cry, it rains to be more beneficial for like the planet, but then you just be like super sensitive all the time. So it'd be like you in like a drought in like a drought. Like your yard's Great. I see what I'm saying. Like like what's the range on it? Because that'd be cool. You could be like, hey, I got to go. You like, force yourself to cry? He cries all the time. Yeah, I got to go cry, walk.
Gotta save the city. OK, well, like I see like where I like, I feel like crying and laughing are not like things that you can do on command unless you're like it an actor, you're good. At being manipulative. OK, an actor. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Which, you know, your boy might be not not not manipulative, but like, I mean, I hope one day that I could cry in command and laugh. I pray for the day I could be more manipulative and cry in command.
Not manipulative, just like an actor, but I feel like I just laugh way more than I cry, so I would just go with the cry part right 'cause I'm laughing all the time. True, but that'd be tight. They're like, yo, I didn't my boy have. It reigned for 5 minutes. My boy Huggie, this this fool can fly dog I've seen. It that is cool too. You gotta see, like you go viral, you get there's some like that'd be very self-serving, being able to laugh and. You go viral.
Yeah, dude, I mean you. Would you? Definitely. Would you can fly? I didn't think about that part. I didn't think about that. This motherfucker can fly. Not fly, not fly, float. You just might as well fly is closer to flying than anybody other motherfuckers getting. That's true. Bitch be floating. And the longer I laugh, the longer I float, son. Like what it's like I have. Dreams where I fly but like it's like floating.
So it's like it's like I'm flying but like I don't really have control over it. It's like a reoccurring dream. It's weird. I have crazy reoccurring dreams now that the dreams are reoccurring but the backdrops are reoccurring. So there's like 1 airport that I'm always at. If I'm at an airport and I'm like I got to travel or go do something, there's the same mall. It's like the weirdest shit. The weirdest, the craziest is there's times where I dream
about like our hometown. I'll bump into random people, you know, like stupid weird dreams like that. But it'll be in neighborhoods that don't exist, but they're attached to neighborhoods that do. So it'd be like driving into your neighborhood and we're like, there's that stop, four way stop. There'd be like a five way. And so where we're all going is at your house, but it's not here. You guys moved off of the street on the five way.
So then it's like, I'm in a neighborhood that I know, but I don't know, it's fucking weird, man. And I'll wake up being like, God damn it, like why am I thinking about this place that doesn't exist? And then I ended up moving back to the area. So I'll go figure. I used to have dreams where all my teeth fell out, but that's. Not that just means you're insecure. What was that?
What they? Say I don't know what it means, but you know, like I've I've googled the fuck out of it and point is I don't have those dreams anymore. It's. The floating ones I still do. See, I have dreams where I can fly and I'm aware there's times where I wait. I'm like aware of the fact that I'm dreaming, that I have control. But as that happens, it's almost like letting a balloon go that it's like, like it's slowly fleeting. Like by the time I reach that, my, my brain's like, abort,
abort, abort. He's knows too much. Who knows what the fuck this guy's going to do? Get out. Pull out. Yeah, always pull out. And then I wake up. I'm like. Damn right there. I was about to inception some shit. OK. Therapy question #2 Would you rather your dreams be broadcasted live on YouTube or your Internet search history printed in the local paper? I feel like the same thing. I Dreams Dreams live broadcasts
would be fucking crazy dude. I know, but the local paper, who the fuck reads it that that's kind of like that? That true, but what your dreams would be would be fucking insane. Like, I mean, that could be really bad for you. Really good. You don't really have that much control. It's just subconscious. It's like free thinking. So, so it would be, it would be almost as crazy as that musical show that you went to. Like it would be fucking tripped out. That was crazy.
Like in a good ass way. It was just super fun. But it wouldn't make sense to a lot of people, so it'd be crazy. And then if you could watch your dream back, that's what would be wild, is if you could go back and watch much a dream you had that you struggled to remember and you remember fragments of it, but not all of it. And it's really like splotty, you know? And then you sometimes you have dreams that are very vivid that you'll remember your whole life.
I probably got like 8 or 9 then I could. Just like your traumatized but. Yeah, in some way, shape or form, it was traumatizing in a good way, in a bad way, whatever. But you walked away from it and made an imprint on you. But if you could watch back one that would be like the most impactful because you'd just be like, what? There'd be all these weird clues and it would be. So it would only make sense to you. There'd be some stuff that would
be probably weird. It's like, why is there a valley of butts? There'd be all sorts of weird shit like that that wouldn't make sense. Valley of Butts. Just saying that's possible. It's a dream. Anything's possible, but and what's that from where there's. Anything is where. There's like a valley where there's a valley. Of like Kevin Garnett shit. All all the time go sees Right now it's go bird. It's go. Other way Go birds. Right now it's go. Birds. Obviously that, but yeah, I'd do
dreams for sure. I'd want to do dreams it. Mine would be like memes on this, memes on that, meme news, breaking news, BBC News articles. It'd be like the most random shit. How? Build your own stone patch. Is like just not that bad like so I could give a fuck. I thought it's bad, it's just not important. I don't want to do something cool man and be like, look, hey everybody, do you want to see a recorded dream? So there'd be did talk about that for forever to be studying.
Yeah. Yeah, like this, this like. I like the take. I like did. You see the video? That black guy's dream on a Wednesday night? Bro, that shit changed my life. I identify with that motherfucker hard. And they're somebody else like. That go viral again that. 'D be the most horrifying thing I've ever seen in my life. Like the reactions, they'd be like an inkblot test for people. OK, see This is why I put these questions in. It's because like, I don't know what your take is going to be.
And I'll. But yeah, OK, that's fair. Yeah, there's precaution #3 would you rather everyone you meet immediately know your most recent purchase or your last text message? Either worse fine. I really wouldn't care if it'd be like you spend too much money on ghost energy drinks. I've like heard on God, but everybody got to have a. No on pod. On POD. Everybody got to have a vice. On on on Ezekiel. On on Casper, 'cause we on that ghost, bro, that's how we doing that.
We on that we on that booshit. You know what I'm talking about on that spooky spooky ooky Watch out, watch your back puffing on that Ichabod pack do. You I would definitely have to save my last purchase 'cause I don't buy anything crazy. Yeah, but but with my last text message it would be totally worth. It could be crazy for me, like I think come on, like like not usually, but like it could see.
If mine would be something about work where you'd be like, oh, that person's in trouble, like that'd be about it. It'd be I'd feel bad for the person that text is about because. I'm usually like screenshotting my text messages and like sending them to either like you or like the group. Like like I've been sending them to like the fantasy football group text, which is like 16 people. And, and this like it's just like, because somebody made like a gay joke like about me, like,
which is hilarious. But so I had to like prove myself like that. I and and then I just kept going with it And and then it's just like so I don't really give a shit about sending text messages, but I get what you're saying. Last purchase of either way, it'd be very impactful, just like I said and like I normally on diesel, I want to do the one that's is the most impactful, makes the most impact leave the biggest crater. It's like, see my dreams? That'd be fucking crazy for
everyone, see. My dreams. For everybody involved. That might be the title of the of the audio. That'd be fucking crazy and who knows what it'll be. I have no control. It'd just be like, roll the dice. What was the dream last night? That'd be crazy. And then, yeah, for sure. I just, yeah. Where did you pick? I'll show you both text. I like it, I like it. OK, final therapy question. Question #4 would you rather only be able to run backwards or
walk on tip toes forever? And now I talked to a person who is a champion track athlete just like Joseph is, and she I'm. Not a champion. Track well. Did you guys not win? And not not. I thought you guys been there like. State or in there, but I want some ribbons and shit. For sure. OK. Well, OK. Well, that's OK, OK. Competitive runner back in the day. There we go. How about that? So was I, but like, I sucked. Like you guys were actually putting up. No, I was like, so I was like
fat. I was like, what? The longer the race to, the faster like. 200 I was faster, I ran competitively it it just didn't work out for me. But it but like no like like I. Remember you running having like like 9 bracelets on or some shit and they made you take them off? Yeah I remember that shit stuff. Yeah you can't. Like the guy was like what the fuck are you? Like I'm fast, but I'm not fast like you. Like like. But anyway, it doesn't even matter. Puka's on, puka shells on.
Yeah, for sure. Like why is this kid wearing all this jewelry? Because I'm stupid. They're like, I don't know, they asked me to get on the bus this week, so I guess I'm running like that's kind of. Somebody backed the fuck up. All the fast kids are playing baseball this week so they couldn't fucking make it so. But I won my. Heats I won. My heats last. Week. OK, well what this person said was that either way, you're getting shin splints. True. Yeah, you're definitely getting chimps.
Running backwards is fun and I think people can actually, if you know how to do it correctly, you can run backwards pretty fucking fast. And when you're doing it fast, it looks weird. Everybody tries to like do short steps, but you actually have to like lean forward and like kick your legs backward. It looks fucking goofy. But for sure I'd probably do tip toes. No. Oh, like, are we talking like
tippy, tippy toes? Every time you walk, which is wherever the fuck I need to go. Can I walk on the ball? Like basically the balls on my feet? You'd have some huge calves. I know, but you have to think about like how often as a man in like that's 38 or whatever, you know, how often do you have to run, you know? Like when it's not by choice. Right. Well, I don't. I would never run.
Well, no, I I take that back. Someone's like, hey motherfucker, I'm gonna rob you and you're like, oh, I could outrun this fat fuck. You're going to run. But you have to go backwards. Yeah. It's or you're always walking on tip toes and you always have to walk. That's that's the that's what. Yeah, if that makes sense. I can. See that? Yeah, it's like, I get what
you're saying, but. If you had to do both, if you walked forward it had to be a new tip toes and if you ran backwards, if you went backwards it was only running and yeah, you could only go backwards. That would be tough. That would be almost worse. Is the only time you could go backwards. Yeah, the only time you could run is go backwards, no. No, no, OK, that that would suck. But I'm saying if you're moving backwards at all, it has to be in a runner's face.
Like you would just like, run people the fuck over. You couldn't like be like up, excuse me? Like you would just like boom. You'd just be taking people the fuck out, dude. Like a step would be so powerful. That'd be insane.
One time I was in college and like B was like about to attack me and I had like my backpack on like full of like 5 like textbooks and I just like jumped out like backwards hit like a tiny little girl who was like probably like 18 knocked her like on the ground because I was scared of a fucking bee.
It was like the most disappointing like shit that ever happened to me. I was just so upset because like she like fell on the ground because I like knocked her back because I was scared of a fucking bee. And I was just like, Oh my God, I can help you. There was a time I was waiting tables at Trudy's, second Trudy's story. And man, if you're there's, if you were at a restaurant, like keep your fucking kids seated.
There are these kids running the fuck around like crazy, just running around and I'm running food. I'm carrying a big ass tray of food. And at this restaurant I used to work at, and this was like a long ass time ago, there were these booths and they were pretty high and it was like there's a 2 rows of them and they ran parallel with little aisles. I'm coming up the stairs. There's these little like 3 step thing. I come around the corner on this food. This kid is sprinting full
speed. Dude, if I I'd be lying if I didn't say I just like ended up drop me in this kid like right in the chest because he comes around the corner full speed and I'm coming upstairs. I take a step and I turn and when I turn with my step my knee just hits this kid like boom and he just goes flying backwards matrix style. Just gets the wind knocked out of him and I feel terrible.
Almost drop a burrito on this kid and thank God the mom was like, dude, I told you to sit down because I was like, I wanted to be like, get your kid bro. Whose man's is this? Like come get this. Come get your boy. Come. Get your boy. You need to come get your boy because your boy is pushing it right now. And like he just got steamrolled by a Lenny Kravitz impersonator and like he is fucked up. And his kid was just like, but
he couldn't. He was like he got the wind knocked out of him so he couldn't cry. And it didn't even hurt. Like it was one of those hits that was so smooth or it was just like. But being. Knocked out of him. It's tough. It's. Tough, but I mean like, it's not like he got like whiplashed. Or anything or. Yeah, yeah, it wasn't. It was just like he just got hit, like right in the sternum,
got knocked. Back 'cause your boy got your boy got his rib broken recently now and I got the wind knocked out of me at the same time and it was the the last time that I got the wind knocked out of me was when I got my rib broken playing basketball. I played three more fucking games and then went to the hospital. But getting the wind knocked out of you is it's just tough. It's. Like, and if you haven't had none of most of us haven't had that happen in an extremely long
time. So when it does, you're like, it's like fucking hurts. I know, but like, but, but I don't know about you, but like, I definitely have had that happen, like a lot like playing hockey and football. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And so it's like, it's like I knew how, like I knew. It's kind of like a panic attack. It's like where you feel like you're going to die and it's like if you've, if it's your first one, like it's scary as hell.
But like if you know what's happening, it's like, OK, you're not going to die. You just got to get to do this for like a minute and you're going to be OK. Yeah. That that's all like getting the one knocked out of you as it's like this is scary. What? What's wild too, is, if I remember correctly, getting kicked in the nuts hurts more than getting the wind knocked out of you one. 100% hurts more but maybe. We've been hitting the nuts so many times. You get past the getting the
wind knocked out of you stage. I don't know when that transition happens, but that doesn't happen as much. You're going to get like tapped in the nuts by like a doorknob when you bump into it weird. You're going to someone's going to throw you their car keys and just go and you're like, oh, motherfucker. And you're like. Feel like in a sexual like situation? Like you used to like want to vomit whenever that you're like oh man that really fucking hurt as we're getting the wind out of
you. Wind knocked out of you sucks when you catch your. Breath. See, that would have been a better therapy question. Would you rather get the wind knocked out of you or kicked in the nuts? Yes, it's weird. Is just some people who are like, oh, kicked in the nuts. Bro for sure. I mean like I. Can talk about this in therapy. You're like, whoa, dude. I I had to like, we haven't really talked about it, but like I had like the Chinese like like 21 year old sex trafficked person. I remember.
You. Yeah. No, I you and I talked about it. Yeah, those are times when I answer the phone. Yes, exactly ask. Me to kick you in and that's it I'm like are you fucking kidding me? You need to leave like I'm trying to get you an Uber like to to save your life, like and you're just going to ask me to kick me and then that's get the fuck out of my face. Straight to the point, that's what she likes. That's crazy.
Yeah, that is pretty wild. No, But also I would tell people whenever they'd ask, they're like, oh, you watch football, I'll tell them some of those big hits that you see that are like, clean, those hurt the least. And I always tell people too, it hurts more to tackle somebody than it does to get tackled. It hurts more to try to stop somebody going another
direction. And. Make totally, totally like what you were saying what you're saying like on like the kick return, like I used to be on the kick return, like yeah, not the yeah, the kick return team. And then I remember our board bow, just who was a beast who like played like college football over in San Diego. I just remember him just like just going ham. And I went to go block him and it was just like, dude hit me so hard. Like I was like.
Because he was all he was a gunner, so he was like going down to make a tackle. Oh yeah, See, I was always a gunner. So I just got to run as fast as I could and try to like take someone out. Yeah. Like if you're if you're blocking on it, that shit sucks. But it but like it hurts more when you did get blocked. Yeah, that shit hurt. Like it hurts more to tackle than it does to make the tackle, than it does to be the tackle. Because I get to adjust, I get
to make moves. I get to try to avoid. You embrace as we're like, I'm aiming for a spot, I'm going to hit it, this person's going to react. We'll see what happens. Yeah, that shit hurts. And, and we're talking about Texas football, so it's like we like we went hard. But like, so I mean, you can get the wear and tear on being tackled can add up, but that's apples and oranges. It can't on the other side.
But that shit hurts. Like you like a lot of people, like you get your bell rung, you get concussions making tackles. Like I think it's some of my worst. 100% I got concussed making a tackle with the boy. Cameron woke up just on like on on the field after after it man, they just went back and played like no idea, no idea what happened like came to nobody cared. Like came to like 30 minutes later I had one. Not 30 minutes later, like I have no idea like how much later to be honest.
Like but like. I would assume like a minute. I had one of those in 8th grade. I got my bell rung and then woke up. I remember looking, no, it was, it was wild. I remember I forgot my football pants so I had to borrow someone else's. And then like, I remember coming to in the back of the easy go with Doc Hanson being like, and I'm like, what am I doing over here? And then I remember being like, who's fucking football pants are these? These aren't mine. Like I'd forgotten that I'd
borrowed somebody. Like that's how hard I got my bell rung. It was like what the fuck? Basically what we're trying to tell y'all is that your boys have CTE coming. No, I'm just glad we didn't go any much further because we might have that's. Not possible, I know. OK, we're going on to the topics. We are going to take a break. I do not want an eye roll from Joseph. There we go. That was like a flutter but on the audio. The audio will be right. The fuck? Back, what can I say?
You're you're on a heater right now. I am on a. Heater making a warm warmer in Texas if it's if that's possible. You know, I'm Chef Curry in the kitchen right now. Oh my. And now we're back with the topics. All right, get into it. I'm just fucking with you. I was like like you. What the fuck bro? So this happened recently.
Obviously this is just another Epstein files distraction, but Donald Trump's released has seized control of the DC Police Department and has deployed the National Guard. He is. So this is from the AP and it's Trump's domestic troop deployment test the limits of a nearly 150 year old law. As President Donald Trump pushes the bounds of military activity on domestic soil, a debate emerged over 150 year old law that regulates when federal troops can intervene in state issues.
About 800 National Guard troops filed into DC on Tuesday after President Trump said without substantiation that there that they that they, that they were needed, sorry, this looked weird, that they were needed to reduce crime in the lawless national capital thousands of miles away. A judge in California is hearing arguments over whether the president's recent decisions to federalize Guard personnel in Los Angeles during protests was against immigration raids
violated federal law. What's wild too about this is DC has right now having as the lowest crime they've had in like exactly like 3536 years ago. It makes. No like it. Other than fascism, it makes no sense. Yeah, he has also created militarized zones along the US Mexico border as part of a major shift that has thrust the army into the immigration enforcement
like never before. Now, this is something that we've discussed before, and I've said if you really give a shit about immigration and people crossing illegally, then you just need to militarize the border. Otherwise you're full of shit. Like, unless you're going to.
I'm not saying that you have tanks there to shoot people, but if you really wanted to use the technology we have on our hands that like drops a Cortana wielding missile from the sky and chops people up about hitting somebody 2 inches sitting next to them. Like you could use that same stuff to patrol the border and actually catch coyotes bringing in people through. The well what about just arresting the fucking owners of the businesses?
Like I got into an argument with somebody recently who employ them. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. It's like, because they don't want to. That's the fucking thing. Yeah, I mean, if the the the ripple effect, I mean we're already seeing some of it, but if they're. Why are we arresting the like if the jobs don't exist? Right? If if if the employer is getting arrested for employing illegal immigrants then it will stop. The fact is they don't want it
to to actually stop. This is like a power move. Oh it's always the border and open borders and all that stuff has been an issue since the 80s. This is like the same debate we've been having in circles for damn near 40. 50 It just bothers me. It's like it's like there's people here who like contribute to this country who just want to like live and we're and then just recently were acting like, oh fuck these people, they have to go.
And it's like, OK, I get if you're in an illegal immigrant, if that's the term we're going to use, they you shouldn't be in the country, right, OK, fine, good. The fact is that there's jobs and houses and everything available. These people pay into Medicare and Social Security, never going to collect it. They don't have a Social Security card. So what are we doing? Like if we want to stop this, arrest the fucking white owner who employs them. Like that's it. Yeah.
But that's, I mean, that's also not the answer because then if you did that and those jobs went away, you'd still lose that revenue. So. But I see what you're saying. No, no, no. I understand. Like if you want to end the problem and like, that's how you, yeah. That's like saying like, are we going to keep arresting the same crack dealer on the street? Whatever I know he's getting, he's dealing drugs for the dude in the mansion down the way.
Why don't I just arrest the guy in the mansion and then the. Cracker No, I'm saying the different. I'm saying I'm saying arrest. The no crack dealer, well, obviously, but I'm saying is it's like it's repeat, repeat, repeat, but it's but it's on purpose. But the crack dealer is selling some drugs for somebody else. So why wouldn't you just go for the the guy who's just actually distributing the drugs? It's like. That's what I'm saying, yeah. Yeah.
So. I I get what you're saying, but I mean that's still the ripple effects of that would be huge. Yeah, well, guess what? So that's. So how about let's just not do it in general? But I've said that if you want to actually stop the shit at the border and take it serious, and that's what you were wanting to do is to. But why?
But why? If you want, well, I've always said you should just, I mean, we're getting a little off topic, but you should all, you should just streamline it and make it easier for people to come here if they want to be here and coming here illegally shouldn't be the basically the only viable option for people to come here. That's what so that's what I'm saying. So if you make it to where it's militarized and they can't, and then you streamline it so that they can come in here legally
and you expedite the process. So does it take like 7 to 8 years to process? And then that would then OK, but like, I'm like, but you can't you, you can't just be like, oh, we're not going to do anything. They're they're crossing through the mountains and we've got drones that could see a fucking freckle on the back of so you. Are you kidding me though? Are you kidding me? Like you're trying to drop drones on people coming. No, not bombs, just to surveil.
You could track people in the mountains. Like like I'm saying like the people that are crossing illegally. There's coyotes transporting people here, making them go on these long death walks through the desert and shit. Like you could find those people and easily track them the entire time if they wanted to. That the that's. But they don't want to. Exactly. But so that's where. That's why this whole thing is so stupid.
That's dumb, but he did do that. The cases, both in California and Washington, mainly hinge on the Posse Comiteus Act. I'm going to say that Komitatus Act Komitatus Act, which passed in 1878 and largely prevents the military from enforcing domestic laws. Experts say that in both cases, there are clear limitations to the law enforcement. Here's what to know about the law.
And the reason, the reason why it's 1878 is it's right after the Civil War. And that's like, so Abraham Lincoln like is the first person who enacted the income tax and it was to pay for the Civil War. And then that's when we had like a full military like for the United States.
There is an exception. I'm sorry that it is a criminal statute that prevents the military from enforcing domestic law, which also prevents the military from investigating local current crimes, overriding local law enforcement, or compelling certain behaviors. It can be bypassed by a congressional vote or in order to defend the Constitution.
The insurrection of 18 O 7 can also trigger the suspension of the ACT and allows the president to deploy military domestically in cases of invasion or rebellion. There's an exception for the US Coast Guard, which has some law enforcement responsibility. That's like hardcore Coast Guard dudes are hardcore just like a game wardens in Texas. They can just like walk onto your property and be like, what are you doing? Like game wardens are crazy.
Look like there if you one of those guys walk up on you, that's worse than what is a. Game warden like like for like wildlife. Yeah, like wildlife hunting, fishing. So they so they could be like, I think you've been fishing and you fished over your limit. I'm going to search your car. And that's all they need like that. That's it.
They can't really do shit. Private property kind of exists 'cause it's like he's there to protect the land and the animals in the land and make sure you're not like destroying the planet. But it's a cop game. Wardens are scary as fuck. I just heard somebody, I'm not even kidding, just heard somebody say that they dress up like a game warden when they fish. And then just like if the game warden shows up, they're like, yeah, dude, I'm here like investigating. But they're actually like.
That's crazy 'cause that's. I swear to God I heard. That's like impersonating a federal officer 'cause they're sue as like, they can arrest you. You're like, you're like, they're like BMX. They can basically search you, search you with no cause because they can just create cause like they're crazy. Like they can do some super wild shit. So if you ever in the woods smoking weed and you get rolled up on by a game warden, like you're fucked. It's not like, oh, I hope this cop's cool.
Game wardens are not cool. Like they're grumpy asshole white dudes who drive around in these tricked out trucks by themselves. They don't roll around with partners any like old white dude in his mid 40s to late 50s that's just allowed to walk around the woods by himself with a gun and enforce law. US is like a dangerous person even if and like even if he's on the side for good. Like yeah, get out there. It's 1,000,000 acres.
No, I know. And then like, you know, ice is just like on that level right now. So it's just. Yeah, ice, ice out here acting like they're game wardens and they're not. The law was enacted after the Resurrection era, and the law was enacted in 1978, post Civil War, during the Reconstruction. So it was after the Reconstruction Era.
Pro segregate segregationist representatives in Congress wanted to keep the military from blocking the enforcement of Jim Crow laws that allowed racial segregation. We don't want the Army telling us that we got to be around black folks. That's crazy. No, I don't think the Army wants to do this. Like and also like what? They didn't say whether or not they were going to be armed when they're in Washington, DC, and they're also not even allowed to be there.
Like it's like the whole thing is nuts, dude. Like it's like, I already knew this dude was a fascist but I didn't know that like he was capable of like doing like fascist shit like this quick like this quickly. What if there's some crazy information that comes out about any of this stuff? And then he's like already got him deployed so he's like, all right, everybody stay back. Like he's like prepared, but it's like. Yeah, that's what that's what it feels like.
Like he's preparing for Fallout, like hunkering down inside his castle and shuttering the doors. That's what it feels like. Why the fuck else would he be doing this? And does he have the big defense back up around the White House? No and defense came up because of January 6th like remind you. No, I know. I'm just. No, no. No, no, he didn't decide to do that. He already got voted out of
office when that happened. Yeah, but the spirit of law, Spirit of law also has roots of going all the way back to the Revolutionary War, when the founders of the United States were scarred by the British monarchy's absolute military control. And William C Banks, a professor, or that's what William C Banks, a professor at
Syracuse University, said. We have a tradition in the United States, which is more a norm than a law, that we want law enforcement to be conducted by civilians and not the military. The ethos ingrained in the National Guard personnel starting in basic training becomes especially powerful in the case of this act, because the law has hardly ever been tested before. So, like, they haven't really done this. They're just like, fucking winging it, dude.
This dude's fucking winging it, and half of it's a distraction. Well, because he doesn't. I wish, I wish he was winging it. It seems systematic to me. And and and and I just didn't know that he knew how to do like something like Putin this like, you know. We're surrounded by people that that's their whole. I know, but Stephen Miller knows. Stephen Miller. Yeah, I agree. I know that's. Exactly, exactly what I thought when I when I heard about this was like dude what what why why?
Like it's so unnecessary. Oh yeah, I mean. So you all just made like $5 billion like in six months on your shit coin and like your, your grift, your, your, your tariffs that you just like change up and then just get like Vietnam to like agree to like a billion dollar golf course. It's like, I just don't get, I don't get like the like, this is what I've been trying to say. It's like we're watching people addicted to money and everybody needs money.
So we just let it happen. Being like, oh, they're just trying to get money. And it's like, no, we're watching crack addicts and now we have one in the fucking White House. It's crazy to me. It's pretty wild, yeah. I mean, the grift is real and. For sure, for sure. And it's. Selling bibles bro. Selling Trump watches. Ridiculous. Well, the OK that like to me. Oh, that was wild. But we were like in the we were
like in the middle. Of gold shoes, bibles, crypto coins like what stakes colleges like what are we doing as a country and. Like what universe is this? Yes. What timeline are we in? It's like, it's like boomers are like, yeah, get it, Get your last grab, bro. Like it's like weird. But why? But why? It's like you're the president of the United States, like you don't need to do anything ever again. You're good. But no, he can't stop himself. It's gross. It's. Gross. Yeah, it's like this.
Gluttonous to the Max like I'm. Triggered. The law applies to federalized troop troops. The ACT typically does not apply to the National Guard because of the Guard members report to the governor and not the federal government. But when the Guard personnel are federalized, they are bound to bound by the ACT until they are returned to state control. Yeah. I mean, it's pretty wild. I mean it's. Unbelievable. Unfucking believable.
He's already he's already in charge of the National Guard and can legally deploy troops for 30 days without congressional approval. There's a lot in the water about the Trump administration. Being you think, you think you, you think those troops, these troops are leaving in 30 days, it's like guaranteed that that that they aren't. There's a lot of water in. There's a lot of water in the There's a lot in the water about the Trump administration being
lawless. What is striking is actually how much the administration is trying to wrap itself into the law. Well, that's how, that's how fascism, that's how fascism works. It's like, it never. It's, it's like you vote them into office. It's a minority. They use the bureaucracy to take over the country. I just didn't know he was capable of doing it. I don't think, I think he's just a good figurehead for it. I don't think he's, he's not acting on his own accord.
He's doing he's, I think that he's surrounded by people he had. Four years before and like it's like he was a shitty president then, but like he didn't like have like these moves like that. That's the problem. And it's like, and it's like why? Why? Like I don't get why That's that's why I struggle like with this shit. It's like, why the fuck are you doing this? Like why do you even care? Yeah, true. That's what I want to know. It's like, what's like when I
get confused? It's like when it bothers me the most. It's just like, I just like, I don't understand what's happening. Beyond the legal exemptions written in the law, exceptions written in the law, there is a practical question of how to enforce it. Because the posse could comitatus. It's COMITATUS. Comitatus Act is a criminal statute, not a civil one. the US Department of Justice is responsible for prosecution in Criminal Court. It's premised on the executive
branch policy policing itself. That leaves at unclear legal standing for whether a state government like California has a right to sue in civil court in the first place. The ruling in California case will likely be a narrow interpretation based on the circumstances of the Guard's deployment in LA. But he said it could dictate how the administration uses the Guard in other cities like Chicago and New York, where Trump has threatened to
federalize troop troops. Because he's already said like we're going to take over other cities if. I already told you your boys are about to be in the streets, like for sure. Why would you be? Oh, like to protest? No, we ain't protesting anymore bro. It's getting way, way crazier, all right. Man, just careful. No, obviously. But I mean, I'm just telling you like I already said this like 1000. You are the leader of Antifa. That is true. So yeah, I got to do some shit. Leader, I forgot.
Careful, man. He's probably watching this article #2 from NPR. Say bye bye to the beeps and bloops of AOL's dial up Internet service. That's right, AOL is going away. It starts off beep boop boop boop. Such was the sound of AO LS dial up service, a marker for trying to connect to the Internet in
the 1990s. Now the company has announced it's getting rid of dial up. AOL routinely evaluates its products and services and has decided to discontinue dial up Internet. It will run until September 30th. I didn't know they were still doing dial up. I didn't even know AOL was still alive. Thechefandy@aol.com Shout out your boy. I mean, I had no idea. Dial up it. What is dial up? Damn dial up. Uses a modem.
Well that that was the problem with the floods is that they didn't have like the Wi-Fi. They had like the dial up. It makes sense. Dial up uses a modem to convert digital data from a computer into audio signals, which can travel over standard phone lines. There you go. Actually, I didn't actually know that was the thing you just can plug. I get it. Oh, I just got something about President Trump. Get out of here. Well, I would think it was like, you should donate to NPR because
President Trump's an asshole. You just have. AI hate that part because I was in the PR a little time and they've been hitting that and they're like. They're like, Trump sucks. Well, like, because like, they'll go through like, I think, I think it's four times like, where they're like looking for money, you know, and it's like for a week each time. And I just can't listen to it, like during those weeks because it's just most of it is just
them like asking for money. And it's just like, OK, well, this is now unlistenable. But now, now it's all the time because of the defunding. Yeah. In some, does it say users had to plug their computers in? Yep. In some ways it's kind of like the sound of the 1990s. I'd agree with that, but it had its drawbacks, such as users not being able to use the phone and the Internet at the same time. It also had a fraction of the speed available in today's Internet Internet landscape.
Downloading a song took several minutes. Downloading a movie was unheard of. Several minutes. Sometimes you'd download a song and it downloaded a song, it'd take days. AOL rolled out its dial up service in 1989. Lawmakers were focused on closing the digital divide, the idea that people were living in poorer or more rural areas could not have had inadequate access to the Internet or equitable.
The company was known for handling for handing out discs and CDs that gave users several hours of free Internet access for free. They were so embedded. I remember getting those too, seeing them all the time in the mail. They were so embedded in the 1990s American cult, American culture, that one of those discs now sits in the Smithsonian's CD. Collections. OK, so remember, I have to go off topic. Remember how I brought up last episode about the trophy, the Tennessee?
We got Sean Gruden to do a cameo and he did it and this motherfucker sold it. Did sold it, like went off for 2 1/2 minutes on Max about not giving the trophy, threw his glasses down and just like laid into him. Fucking great dude Did. You find out anything about the trophy? Dude OK, so this is what happened. He sends like a picture of the trophy as because I asked for proof of life and I got and I was ago. I was like Nah. I was like I need a newspaper like with the date on it next to
the trophy. But literally the text before he sent us the picture of the trophy, he said he was on mushrooms at outside lands like which is like a festival. And so I was like, and then everybody was like, OK, so you will send it now I go. And then I just clicked like a clock with me. And I was like, yo, he just told us he was on mushrooms at a festival and acted like he just took a picture of the trophy. Open your fucking eyes. Like the trophy is gone. But Gruden, I'm going to say
I'll send you the video. Gruden fucking kills him. Kills him. That's pretty awesome. I'll have to check it out. You send it to me. The company's known for hanging out disk. Yeah. Dial up was considered accessible at the time as it requires A landline technology and many Americans had that. However, it has largely been replaced by broadband Internet. As of 2022.1% of American households relied on dial up access for the Internet.
For those people who live in rural communities today, they're going to have to find an alternative. AOL did not introduce dial up, but it became popular popular because of its ease and its use use in interface, which included things like news and e-mail on a home page. Hey. Max Max John Gruden here, the old coach. Max is playing this. Here in Tampa, FL, I got a lot of work to do, man, but I can't
concentrate. I got a message from everybody in the dynasty league, the fantasy Football League, and it's troubling. You know, this is a 15 year league, man. The dynasty trophy is the most prestigious trophy there is. I mean, you could say the Lombardi Trophy maybe, but the dynasty trophy, it is freaking significant, man, and the dynasty trophy is missing. Are you aware of this, Max? You're the commissioner. You're the king of relentless trash trading bullcrap.
Where's the trophy? You had it last. It's been 2 years since anyone's seen the freaking trophy. Now everybody's calling me. Everybody's beat me up. They got to get this trophy back. So they called me in to call you to tell you get the freaking trophy back, man. And I know you look like Zoolander, OK? And I know you're walking real. Everybody's like, look at that guy. And I know it bothers you looking like that, but that's no excuse, Max. It's no excuse.
That's. Awesome. And I. Think there should be punishments for this trophy under your watch being missing? Because it's a very important trophy. I think you should get a spray tan on half of your body. OK. And I think you should walk around the freaking neighborhood with a pair of shorts on and a hat, sunglasses. And then I think you go door to door with 20 blank CDs blank, and you sell them door to door.
That's your highlight tape from last year's fantasy football that you were the commissioner of. Hey, you want to buy my highlight tape? No one's going to buy it because they're 1999. And when they do buy it, there are no highlights because it's blank. That's the kind of crap that you're pulling. You need to be punished for this. And I'm telling you this too. You got a guy, Joey. He needs the trophy, man to keep his existence. I mean, this guy's struggling
without the trophy. How do you deal about that? Better get this done, man. I'll check in later. Hey, that's epic. How much would that cost? $300. That's worth it. Totally. It's worth it. It's 20 bucks each because there's 16 people, but we kept him out 15 * 20. Yeah, that's great. That's totally. That's a good use of. 20 I knew it was going to be good, I just didn't know it was going to be that good. Yeah, I know. You look like, did you guys send him a picture of him or
anything? No, like we sent him the script. Oh. I I I your boy, you know your boy. You think you didn't have him cuss? I would have made him cuss. No. Well, maybe he like like he like changed it up a little bit, but he he kind of he, he stuck to it. But it was like a 300 bucks for like 250 characters. Like it was like there was like
a thing. So I came up with like bullet points and then because like, everybody else was like into this and I came in late and then I just woke up like in Beverly Hills and it was just like, fuck, like, this is amazing. It was a genius, Greeden's awesome, but this is the end of an era of the dial up, so, I mean, there's still going to. Be a because you said burn CDs. That's that's why I thought about. It no, no, I gotcha. But this is an end of an era for dial up.
I mean, that's the death of like the one of the original dinosaurs of Internet, but that's that's huge. Didn't know it was still around. Lasted way longer than I thought. Talk about longevity in the Internet game. Dial up Wi-Fi ain't even been
around that long. No, I know my dad actually like like put through like copper cables, like from California to Japan, like he was in charge of that for, for high speed Internet, you know, but it's crazy that like people like in West Virginia just don't have it or, or rural Texas or whatever. Yeah. But but, but, but then it's scary though too, because Elon, Elon Musk is like got 60% of the low like orbit satellites that can provide Internet and it's like he's got a monopoly on it so.
Yeah, he's got Starlink, so that's what he's that's what I'm talking about, yeah. Yeah, yeah. So it's like now we have like this asshole who's like in charge of like the better Internet and it's just. Is it wild on the space? We're we're fucked again. Yeah, we're talking in a lot of ways, man. I know, I know, but but let's stay positive here on the pod. Article #3 I'm going to read the first one first.
Grand Theft La Boo Boo $30,000 in stolen La Boo Boo dolls found in Southern California house Nearly $30,000 of stolen La Boo Boo dolls were discovered in a San Bernardino. Of course, it's in San Bernardino County home after they were taken in a course, Yeah. Why you shit on my state like that? Under state, just certain parts we're from and I mean no SAN. Bernardino No, no, no, no, You're right. You're no, it's not. I'm not, I'm not that off base. Trust me, I'm not. Yeah, I know.
It's. Like my sister lives in Studio City, my uncle lives in Thousand Oaks. Studio City is different, and I was born in Thousand Oaks, so we're good. No, Grandma Van Nuys shut up. Yeah, they were taken. Oh Jesus Christ. The guy who stole them looks insane, bro. Whoa, there is a video. That dude looks fucking creepy.
But you're stealing $30,000 worth of labooboo found in San Bernardino Monday. Investors investigators didn't say when the dolls were taken, but they did say they were recently investigating a warehouse burglary where suspects suspects stole boxes containing highly sought after blah Boo Boo collectible figurines. These items, popular in pop culture, are often sold for high prices online. We've taken in multiple trips
over several days. Well, they were taken in multiple trips over several days. So somebody hit that la Boo Boo, like, dude, they found like access to them and they hit that shit like multiple times. That's a lot of la Boo Boo. Not kidding, got a text while we were on break. We're late on the LA Boo Boo. No, I know this just happened. These guys somebody. No, no, no. Just somebody told me that like
where the wild things are. It was like more of an update than the Boo Boo. I have no idea what any of it means. Where does Where the Wild Things Are like the like the story, that story's tight. No, I know. I was like, I like that's. Kind of what they look like, they look like creatures from Where the Wild Things are, but we'll get into that. But I'm just I'm just talking about this. No, no, I'm just keeping you updated.
While investigating the theft, police were served with a search warrant for a home in Upland where they found fourteen boxes of stolen merchandise. There we were also recovered evidence indicating that there were items that the items were being prepared for resale across the country. One suspect who tried to free from police was arrested at the scene. They have not yet identified them. Police said the dolls were returned to the rightful owners last week.
Authorities in La Puente, which is about 25 miles from Upland, We're looking into a similar theft of Libooboo dolls from One Stop Sales, a novelty store, in which in that case, thousands of dollars worth of collectibles were also taken. Days after the theft, deputies helped recover some of the stolen knives. How are you stealing these libooboos and getting like they're catching you the next day they're finding like they're just like, oh, there's one of them that's. Ring camera bro True.
It's like. You and I, it's like you and I stealing like fucking modellos or something. You know, like back in like 2003. La Boo Boos are characters created by the artist casting Lung from his The Monsters book series. They have become especially popular in recent months as plush dolls. So what the fuck is a La Boo Boo? I'm guessing it. I thought you just said it looks like. I got on a Libooboo is a plush toy that is causing a frenzy. Here's its origin story. This is from NPR.
It's a plush doll. It's a bag charm. It's a collectible that recently sold for six figures. But no, it's a wildly popular creature. Is it a gremlin or the one of the monsters from the classic movie Where the Wild Where the wild things are? There we go meet Labooboo. Labooboo comes in a range of sizes as figurines, plushies, but the most popular in blind boxes, which is like gambling. I was listening to Tim Dillon talk about this. He's like, it's like gambling
for kids. So you don't know what you get. You buy a Labooboo and I hope. It's what I mean, that's kind of like baseball cards, right? You don't really know what like baseball like. You could get a Ken Griffey junior rookie. Card. That's true. That's true. That's true popular in blind boxes and our beloved among young adults, considered a popular fashion trend often
clipped to bags or belt loops. Most most recently, people are dressing up as the plushie and at a Pride parade and a protest against immigration rates. So people are just running around like the boob is dude let. Me. See here. Life-size Liboo boo's not like a terrible like name. I call you Shorty. Last week, a life-size Liboo Boo figure sold for more than $170,000 at the first the first Liboo Boo art auction hosted in China. The event drew nearly 1000 bidders.
You know what that reminds me of? Is like NFTS, like the the, what was it called? Like the was it something ape? Oh, Board 8, Board eight. Yeah, that's what. That's what it reminds me. Yeah, that. Yeah, that's what that shit reminds me of. It's like, yeah, this shit, you just dropped $200,000 on this shit. It's not worth anything. Nobody even is going to give a fuck in one year. And be like, oh, you're that idiot who bought that little boot.
But at the same time, like, I gave away my Pokémon cards and Magic cards and they're probably worth like hundreds of thousands of dollars. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. For sure. They became highly sought after collectibles. La Boo Boos were a storybook character born in Hong Kong. One moved to the Netherlands when he was 7, where he quickly fell in love with Nordic fairy tales, especially the ones about elves.
Inspired by the folklore, he wants an illustration book called The Monsters in 2015, A playful trial of featuring a playful tribe of female elves known as La Boo Boos. That's why I wanted to create something that I've known existed in my heart. It's amazing that so many people love it. Yeah, Especially, like, 10 years later, people are riding near a La Boo Boo Dick. La Boo Boo's just. Cannot wait for that.
La Boo Boo Dick kind of hearted and eager to help, though their good intentions can sometimes lead to chaos. According to Long, there are about 100 different la Boo boo's in the series. One of the stories involves around a involves a la Boo Boo, who's dating a shy skeleton named Ty Coco and often play fully teases him what became a global sensation. So awkward.
Yeah, I mean long release artistic toy series inspired by the characters not long after it came out, but the toy collection did not 'cause a global K craze till he teamed up with Chinese toy Chinese toy Chinese toy company Pop Mart in 2019. According to Pop Mart, the revenue generated from the first Monsters series launch broke the record in the art toy category. Damn, they've been spotted on the bags of pop singers like Dua Lipa, Rihanna, Lisa and KK pop group Blackpink.
But yeah, shout out BLACKPINK even though I like to shit on K pop just because I want them to come after us. But Blackpink is the real deal. The Boo boo's come in various. That's wild dude. This shit's stupid. The blind boxes. Is it new? It taps along the long standing fascination with mystery and
chance. Like I said, think of the back of cereal box prizes, capsule toys from vending machines, or Chinese Japan's lucky bags which are sealed with random items as a way to get retailers to get rid of leftover stock. Even trading cards such as Pokémon Yu-gi-oh offer the same thrill. Think there's a lot where the popularity among among young adults or adults and young adults stems from childhood nostalgia, she said. It was like reconnecting with your inner child.
I think play is critical for everyone of all ages. It helps us to engage with each other. It helps us in a way. It's cliche, but it helps us stay young, she said. I don't know, bro. I ain't by no goddamn la Boo Boo. Oh. Obviously, we are not. Like that's crazy. Who, dude? It's not that crazy shit. Coins exist. Beanie Babies exist. True Beanie Babies are wild. I remember that. That was insane. I have a Princess Diana bear. I was like everybody. Nothing about this is surprising to me.
But those were kind of those, I guess it's kind of, it's definitely the same because that was bullshit. With the Pokémon stuff or the Beanie Baby stuff, you can have one and it's like, oh, but if you had the felt ears, it would be worth like $9000. So you're like, what? And this shit's been in my backpack. And then some people would bring that shit. And what was really goofy is the little plastic cover for the tag to keep the tag in pristine condition.
There's people who had like every Beanie Baby. I was like bro, and I thought that was weird as shit. I still kind of. Do no, I still do too. I'm. So now you see the libooboo thing and it's the same thing. Yeah, it's exactly the same. But it but it's. But my point is it's, it's, it's just that it's not weird because you and I have witnessed this
happen before. What's weird is whenever you see people that are like adults and they all they have like cabbage patch baby meet ups or all the like old like Gen. X and boomers bring their big meet. UPS. Yeah, you ever know, You've never seen those videos. And they'll all get together and they bring them and act like they're basically their kids. It's not no, I definitely have not seen that. It's fucking crazy. Might be in my porn search history now. Yeah, you just hope for it.
You can then share it. Yeah. I mean, that was just, I just thought it was interesting that there's like this epidemic of people stealing la Boo boos in California, but then it's like, what the fuck's a la Boo Boo and why? Would you spend no clue why? Would you? Why would you spend 170 + K on a human size plushie? Oh, it's human size. Yeah, it was like a like a human size la Boo Boo. And it sold for almost 200 grand. Well, do you ever watch Dave like Lil Dicky show?
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, like he like fucks like like a fake human. I. Haven't seen that. One yeah, yeah, he does that. And so anyways, like it's like, I don't know, people are fucking weird dudes like. Someone's going to fuck that little Boo Boo dude. Somebody, somebody. And by somebody, I mean my brother was trying to tell me like that there's AI girls on only fans that people like subscribe to.
And I was like, no, I was like, if your company is making an AI like female, why would they have to like Pimper out on only Fans and not just have you like directly come to their website? Like didn't make sense to me. Yeah, I guess the only fans would give it the illusion of like, not. Well what I guess what he was saying was that it's like it'll be a girl that's on only fans but then she'll do AI where it's like her but it's not her is what he was saying.
But that's not what he said at 1st And I was like Nah dude like doesn't even make sense. Like if you're capable enough to make like an only fans woman who does like weird shit that people want to watch. Like fuck a little Boo Boo. Like why the fuck would you like have only fans as like your third, like you know, third party involved, Like you would just have them just buy the shit from you and you could figure that out. Yeah, I could see that.
And the world is getting whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, weird. It's been weird, but it's getting too weird. Yeah, I agree. I I, I really, really thought that it was like oversold on how weird it was going to get. And now I'm now I'm concerned. I like we underestimated the weirdness. I did, I did. I don't know if I don't know if everybody did like, because there's people who think like AI is going to like kill like like humanity and I'm not there yet. It could.
No, no, I'm not saying it. Couldn't it. Could want to. I'm not saying that it couldn't or it might not happen. What I'm saying is I doubted it. Remember I used to say like I thought AI was going to, like, eat itself. Yeah, like to me like that was more of a possibility than dudes getting only fan subscriptions to AI females. Like that's insane to me. An only fan subscription subscription is an insane to me in general. Facts. Big facts. Never understood that.
It's wild. Yeah. Well, you got anything else today, man? I would like to say meditate bitches. Make sure y'all like, follow, subscribe, share, comment, post, hate on us, whatever. We appreciate y'all checking it out. Unless no, just whatever. Hate on us? We have a five star rating on Spotify.