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Security Guard Horror Stories

Jan 13, 2023•1 hr 3 min
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Episode description

In this episode, Bob and Brittani dive into the truth about working security. With personal encounters to spare, we can't make this up.

🔔We would love to see more of you! Head over to Facebook and join the Tales From The Dark group to keep up with up to date information and current investigations!

📌If you love the show and want to get more exclusive content, check out our Patreon at patreon.com/talesfromthedark !

Transcript

M m. He was cold. Cold that he was cold. Mine, what's going on up there? Could be the most important event in history. Now I have the cold to destroy our worlds, I said. I hope this is close to hill. It's all ever again. Hello and welcome to the Details from the Dark Podcast. I'm your host Bob with my co host Brittany. Hey guys, what's up Brittany? How is it going? And it's finally Friday. I know I'm excited. I am as well. My motors running. It's gonna be a wild weekend. It actually is. Do

you want to go into why? Okay, So, as some of you know, Brittany and I have been as by some of you, I mean everyone that listens to the show, because we've been talking about it for a year, have been working on a documentary and it has been a ruler coaster, to say the absolute least. Yeah, and something that day I thought would never come came today where I uploaded it to our YouTube channel. Now you guys can't watch it yet. We're actually having a cast watch party tomorrow.

So weird to say that it is, but we have of everyone you know, Tyler, Austin, Nathan Us, We're all going to be in the same place for I think the first time since our last investigation at Randolph. I think so actually, and we're going to sit down and watch the documentary and so we it's it's been a challenge. This has been the most challenging thing creatively I think any of us have ever done or been a part

of. Yeah, and I you know, it's one of those things where when it's your own stuff, you're always going to find things wrong with it, but you're also always going to kind of be blind to the flaws. And I have seen bits and pieces of it. And the one thing I will say, and this is the best I guess for review I can give

it is it's something I would watch. And you guys know how critical, especially the patrons, are aware of how critical I am of paranormal media in general, and of the most listeners are aware of how just critical I am when it comes to anything to do with paranormal media, when it comes to

TV shows, movies, whatever. I mean. There's certain guests that we've turned down because I don't like their portrayal on television or on movies, and that was a big concern of mine when we approached let's make a paranormal documentary because I shit on them so much. It's kind of it's really we found out the hard way. It's easy to get wrong, and it took a lot of trial and error for us to get it to where it is. And I'm very excited and kind of emotional. I guess I never I haven't

really thought about it until just now. I'm kind of emotional thinking about it's actually done. Yeah, it's actually done. We've been talking about this for so long, and it's just one of those things where it's one thing to talk about it. It's one thing to go investigate in film. It's another thing to have the finished product uploaded to YouTube. Yeah. No, I

completely agree. It was an amazing journey, and I'm just very excited to get y'all's opinions on everything that we did for the past year for this documentary. No, let me ask you real fast. So you've seen toll of like twenty seconds. You've seen the introduction, and I made you watch the credits and that's all you've seen. Did it exceed your expectations given everything going

on? Oh? Absolutely absolutely did, Because even just the b roll in the beginning, I was like, well, god, damn, that's that's some fancy stuff right there. They ain't your backwoods documentary right there. Yeah, I was very impressed with the finished product. I didn't think about it. And again, it's it's just it's one thing to be there in the moment. It's another thing to see it, you know, the polished finished product. And yeah, I'm excited to see everyone's response. We're going to

be doing a lot of media for Phantom Farm. That's the name I kind of slipped there, but you know what, we can announce that now. We actually announced it over on Phantoms and Monsters because it kind of it just kind of felt fitting. Speaking of which, if you guys missed our interview last Friday, I know there's a lot of comments on Facebook saying, hey, I missed it. They have uploaded the full thing to YouTube, So if you go the Fantoms and Monsters YouTube channel, you can see our Britney

with Tales in the Dark. Yeah, you'll see the entire interview and that was a lot of fun. But yeah, the documentary is called Phantom Farm. The patrons will get to see it before anybody does, including you know, the YouTube, Amazon Prime everything. It'll go up on Patreon. First, we're going to do a watch party. I'm not sure right now. The tentative release for this is mid February. We're going to do a Patreon

watch party before then, probably a week or two before then. So as soon as we have a final date and time, I will let everyone know. But this is going to be one of the few that we're gonna schedule pretty far in advance. I want to make sure everyone that wants to make it can make it, because again we're talking, well over a thousand hours of editing went into this thing. I don't know, it's a thousand too

little or too much. I'm not sure, but a ridiculous amount of time went into this project and it's an absolute labor of love, and I hope everyone appreciates it and enjoys it as much as we have in the shitty thing. As I was kind of talking to Tyler about this this week, He's like, you know, we got a plan in the next one, now, right, And I was like, let me let me enjoy the first one. Yeah, let me enjoy this victory lap real quick, Tyler,

Why don't you just calm it down? Yeah? But it's it's exciting. So I think you guys will enjoy it. And again you'll hear us talk about this a lot, especially as we get closer to the release day. And if you are a patron or you considering enjoining Patreon, now it's a great time. Keep an eye out. I will make a post in there probably tomorrow after the cast watch party, and we'll go ahead and plan a date, like I said, as early as we possibly can, because I

want everyone to have a chance to watch this thing. Absolutely so apart from that, Miss Brittany, it's gonna be an exciting weekend because we have a Bengals playoff game this Sunday. Yes we do. I've been a Bengals fan my entire life. I have never no, I'm going to cut you off. I have never been able to say two years in a row, we're watching a Bengals playoff game. The amount of stuff that's happened with the Bengals in the last two weeks has been history in the making. For one but

two, it's been absolutely ludicrous and insane. I mean we started off, I was looking at the Vegas stats. There was not a single Statician, not a single one that had the Cincinnati Bengals making it to the wild card game of the playoffs, let alone being division champions. That's how shitty we had starting this season. Then Joe Burrows like, hey, hold my cigar, watch it I'm about to do. Yeah, it's a dream come true

for you. Got so much good things happened this weekend. The thing is, I have been a bruised and beaten Bengals fan for thirty years, and for like three now I can say, you know what, it's cool to be a Bengals fan for the first time in my fucking life. It's still hilarious though, to hear the commentators still shit talk the Bengals and they will openly say, well, I just it's so easy to talk to the Bengals, so that's why I do it. It's kind of it's a force of

habit at this point. You know, we're just used to the Bengals. I'm underperforming. Fuck you, we went to the Super Bowl last year, sir. You put some respect on Joe Burrow's name. Yeah, basically, oh yeah, And again, if this is your first episode tuning in to Tales from the Dark Friday shows, yeah, it's Friday, baby. We like that a little bit more fun and we kind of don't take things as serious because one of the weekend, this is an exciting weekend for us because

a lot of times January February is written him my slow month. This year is not shaping up to be Oh god, no, So I think it's just going to be an uphill and then downhill battle when it comes to content this year and ours Shenanigans we're gonna get into. I'm definitely excited. I don't even know. Like that's the thing though, Like I know we need to get into our episode. But when I think till this year, I

don't even know what we're gonna do, Like where we're gonna go? Yeah, like we have done so much in the last couple of years, Like what are we gonna do? Are we just gonna go get full blown abducted by a ritual? Like what what? What's the next step? Well, there is one thing I can say for sure that we're doing this year. I just don't know when we are going to go to the Sally House this

year. Oh yeah, I've been having some NonStop synchronicities with the Sally House and for some reason, so we actually almost went but a week ago, two weeks ago. Yeh, they almost made the drive to from fucking Ohio

to Kansas to go do this. Well, it's it's one of those weird things where as an investigator, there's like your bucket list of investigations, right, like places that everyone goes to, every TV show, every movie has been to, and you know the big ones like Waverley, Ohio State reforma Tory, Saint Augustine, those are your big like, you know you have

to go see them. But Sally House has grown in popularity, and so I kind of just put it in the back of my mind, like the waiting list is gonna be seven eight months, if not longer, because like Waverley, for example, can take ten to twelve months to get into and I figured the cost would just be insane because some of these places will charge four hundred dollars, six hundred dollars, one thousand dollars and up, and some of them who are charging thousand plus. It's not even for a full

night investigation. Yeah, you get to book four hour you book a four hour block and it's usually eight to midnight and depending on the time of the year, that means three hours of darkness if you're lucky. Yeah, So when I kind of like, fuck it, I'm gonna look into Sally House and I saw it. Sally House is like one hundred and twenty five bucks, and I was floored because some of these locations, like I said, that, are you know, your big mount rushmore of paranormal ghost hunts.

They cost so much money. You have to plan way in advance, and then in some cases you have to make content out of it. And with the Sally House, I'm not sure what we're gonna do because that's one of those I just want to experience it. I wouldn't be shocked if we do a two night thing there. One night, we film one night it's just me being a kid in a candy store, but it's actually a chubby kid in a demon house. That's what this is going to be. That's it.

That's the new T shirt right there. Chubby kid going into a demon house said a lollipop he's gonna get exactly. Let me let me know if you guys want to sponsor by Chef Boyardy, speaking of which I don't know if I talked about this. I got a mysterious package the other day. Oh yeah, So mysterious. So well, it was because I thought, I'm like, oh, Brittany ordered something because it was in the mailbox. I'm like, I didn't think of any of it. And I open it.

I go and get it and it says from Austin Lawrence and I'm like, I forgot to give Auston my home address. This could be dangerous. I'm in danger. So I opened it up and it's got these two bowls that are Chef Boyardy branded from Donnosaurs and Chef Boyardy go together. I'm assuming that those are from like the late nineties. Yeah, they look old. And then there were two Super Bowl coins from like ninety two and ninety three

where Chef Boyardy sponsored the Super Bowl. Yep, and they're commemorative coins from that super Bowl. The nineties was such a weird time. The thing about the nineties is if if you didn't grow up in the kindes, you don't really, in my opinion, understand modern satire. And I say that because I'm finally watching Supernatural. Oh my god, finally we finally bit the bullet and did it all right? And I again, we're gonna get into the episode in just a minute, but this is this is my third or fourth

time watching Supernatural. Well, okay, so Tyler's been telling me forever to watch it. You've been telling me to watch it. The fans had been telling me to watch it. And I don't know what I thought Supernatural was about. It wasn't. It's not what it's about. I know that for sure. I know spoilers were only on season two. Guys. Yeah I had back when, back when seasons were like thirty episodes, well about just ten. Yeah, So this way, no one spoils it for me.

Because Tyler's almost spoiled it a handful of times. I will beat him. The episode that I just finished was Sam Ordine told Sam what his father told him on his deathbed. That's where I'm at. So don't tell me anything after this. Don't ask me about characters and some of the people who married people and I want to hear it because I don't. I'm tyl If you listen to this, actually, i'll see you tomorrow. I will beat your

ass if you try to spoil this for him. I'm invested right now, and I'm I'm very uh it is it is good They play fast and loose with with facts when it comes to this stuff, but um, a lot of it for the time period. When did it come out two thousand and five, Yeah, something like that. For the time period, it's pretty pretty accurate. I give them a lot of props, especially on the demonology side. And somebody on their writing staff knows what they're talking about with the

cryptics too. They also know that that what they're talking about doesn't sell, so they do jazz it up a little bit, But there is a factual basis to most things in that show up to this point. I understand there's fifteen seasons, there's a lot of time for them to ruin that, but up to this point, I'm pretty fucking impressed. You just wait, Tyler keeps telling me the same thing. Just wait, wait till they get to this episode and this person, I'm like, shut the fuck up, don't

tell me anything. I don't And again, I don't know how I missed it, because Tyler made a point. Today's like this is right up your alley. It's everything you love. It's you know, it's it's guns, it's muscle cars, it's ghosts, like, it's everything you love. And I'm like, you know, you got a fucking point. Honestly, I

just don't know why I never watched it. I'm excited, but uh, I think I think honestly though, I think Supernatural is perceived as like a girly show because you know, a lot of a lot of girls, including me, yeah, crushed on Dean particularly, but not a little bit of Sam. But it's really I think it's for all audiences. I really well to show the impact it has. We have two Raptors and arc named after the Winchesters, so only one. I thought we named the baby one Sam.

No, oh no, that's that's that's Scotty. Scotty. Well, yeah, because I have a bo Okay, well, we'll talk about the rest of some Patreon let's let's get into today's episode a little bit. So I thought we did this episode, and I look through our archive. We did not. We did night shift horror stories, which is weird because I've been in the security industry my entire adult life, like with the exception of doing some other things either part time or as a second job. When before,

it's weird that we never really dove into security guard horror stories. About said, horse stories horror stories. You gotta watch out for the security horses. So it's well, it's great now because like you are a full time content creator, so you can tell all the ludicrous stories and all the bullshit that you went through. I still have to change certain details out, and I can only tell stuff about previous companies I work for. But there's a

few stories that come to mind. One I know I've told the story, but I'm gonna get into it in a second. And the other one I remembered when I was brand new into security and I worked as a flex and what that is is I worked all three shifts and I worked anywhere anytime,

basically like how security usually works. You have a branch office or it'll be called a district in certain companies, and flex officers are like, if Brittany calls off tomorrow, I would come workers shift, But then if Terence calls off and Toledo, I would go work his shift the next day, and you get a shift premium, but it usually doesn't cover all the travel and

then the headache of working all three shifts is rough. Yeah, but I remember being a flex officer and I got a call to go work in Fairborn about five minutes in right path. There was a company that was shutting down and they were moving warehouses from one to another. And they were a pretty big tech company. I don't even know if I've told you this story, but they were a pretty big tech company and they did a lot of like

online server storage. So this is like before cloud storage was a normally before you can go on Google Drive and get you three terabytes of storage were twelve bucks. Like before that, you had companies that you would sign up on their website and you would use their cloud storage. Well, I arrived at this post the dude just fucking leaves, which is very common. I think

you told me that on the way to Columbus. No, No, that's a different story that I'll tell because again these I was a security guards. I can tell these horror stories. But I get to this place to dude just fucking leaves, okay, and nothing. So I go and I look for the post orders, which post orders every site or a location that works. I'm just supposed to have one. Yeah, their post orders was literally a sign in sheet and then a bathroom break, Like you're supposed to write

down your bathroom breaks. Fuck that, I'm not doing that. I'm alone in this giant warehouse. So I call my boss. I'm like, hey, what am I supposed to do? Look, he's like, oh, just read the post orders and then just follow that, have a good night. Hangs up. That sounds about all right, okay, fuck me. So I'm just doing rounds, you know, doing the normal stuff. And it's hilarious because I found out okay, hey, let let me let me

retrack a little bit. So I'm doing my rounds. And most of the services were torn down from the walls, and this was a massive warehouse full of like like Florida ceiling server space. Oh my god, and most of it was gone, but the racks were still there. Well, I've been a tech guy as long as I can remember, and I love seeing just how things work, how they go together. I had never seen digital storage

set up like this, not in a professional way. Some looking at the racks and stuff, and I see that some of the lights are still on and some of the data lights are still blinking, meaning it's still transmitting data. So I'm kind of looking around and I check this one little closeted area and I noticed this little baby Mac Mini. And when I say Mac Minie, I don't mean like the modern Mac. I mean the two looking television mac Minis and so I'm looking at it and I was like, man,

this room is fucking hot. I put my hand by where the radiator would be and it's just blowing out hot. I'm like, this thing is crashing. So I'm gonna do the right thing and I'm gonna turn it off. I turned it off, go back and do my rounds. Think nothing of it. About three hours later, two guys come to the front door and they're buzzing the front door. I didn't know the procedures for letting people in, so I go and I open it and they said, hey, is there a fire? And I was like, who the fuck are you?

I don't that's a weird question to ask a total stranger. And he's He's like, oh, well, I'm the manager for blank company. We had a massive outage. And I was like, no, there's no fire, it's just me. Do you have any idea anything to show that your work here in The guy answering a business card. I'm like, that's great, I need something like a batge and he's like, I managed these fucking warehouses. You're gonna let me in. I'm like, you didn't have keys,

So I don't know who you are. Well, he ends up calling my boss, who calls me. I get chewed out because this is the client. Again, I didn't know who this was. I let him in and he head straight to this little storage room. Oh god, and he says, did you turn off the fucking Mac Mini? I said, yeah, it was like blowing out so much hot air, like it smelled like it was catching on fire. He turns it back on. About ten minutes later, he gets a call from it. Hey, everything's back up and running.

This multi multi million dollar company was using the bootleg the X thirty two process for the entire cloud service. Oh my god, off this Mac Mini and he goes. I said, well, like, how was I supposed to know anywhere else? Like you're supposed to turn computers off, especially if I think they're going to catch on fire. And he's like, yeah, we should have had a sign up. You shut the whole company down.

And so I'm apologizing and I'm laughing about this because I'm like this all over Mac Mini, ancient piece of fucking hardware is running this entire multi million dollar company. And he says, yeah, we don't know how to get the boot process off of this, no one has been able to do it? Are you serious? So instead of starting over, they just kept building off of it? Yeah and investing. Well why? Why? This is hilarious And I think where the inspiration for this entire episode came from is I saw

a Twitter picture that said the exact same thing happened at Twitter. Are you serious? Verbatim? Why? I don't know. I'm assuming that that's all they have when they built it, and then the technology advanced too fast and there was no way to pull it off of the old hardware. But as a tech guy, that doesn't make sense to me. But I'm also not a Mac guy. I tried. I'm not, you know, I don't

like Mac go West, so I have no idea. And everyone I tell a story too, they're like, you're full of shit, You're making this up. You're that's exactly what clients would do. And it's hilarious because I end up getting a call from the client like a year later, said Hey, we're gonna start doing full time security. We'd like you to come run our facility. I'm like, I doubt it because why did they call you?

Of all, I'm like, I'm the guy who did this and like, oh, we thought this was the person who'd been working here for like three years. I'm like, no, Like, we're the last phone number that was written in the log book, so we thought that that's who you were. Like, no, I'm the guy who shut down your service, and the dude hangs up. He just straight up hung up the phone on me. I was like, all right, fuck it, what you know

what? I deserve this wholeheartedly. But I had it on speaker in front of like two guards, and I just told him a story like the week before. I'm like, now, do you guys believe me? They lose their shit laughing, and I was like, you know what, I deserve this because I shut down an entire company. Why are they running it off of mac Many It's gotta be, like I said, I'm sure that there

is a very convoluted story for why. But what's funny is I asked the guy who I was covering the shift for and he said, the last thing they came and got from the whole warehouse they sent an entire truck in because that's what they had been doing. They've been backing up these fifty three foot trucks. They sent a fifty three foot truck just to grab this one mac. Oh my god. And I'm assuming that was like a kind of a freight error that they did. They thought they had a whole nother loboon an

actuality. They just had this one Mac. And the guy I said, did they say anything, he said, yeah, they they paid more money to have a driver, to ensure that a driver hadn't had a break or had already had his ten hour break so he could come straight here, which tells me they were still relying on six seven months later on this mac mini. Oh my god. Yeah, that was that was fucking rough. What about you when you think horror stories, I mean, apart from your ex

client, does anything else really come to mind for you? Uh? Yeah, that that definitely for sure. No, not really. I mean third shift night shift is just a bunch of like shenanigans. That was my least favorite shift to staff and to manage. Yeah, Like, I don't know who in our audience is a third shift or but I'm telling you every single person i'm at who wanted to be on third shift, which I do kind of enjoy. The third shifts sleep schedule is like fucking weirdos, and they

do not want to listen. They don't want to do their job. It's it's hard. It was rough. But no, I don't think I had any crazy stories unless you remember me telling you one. I mean, really, it's it's funny because people all you know, you hear people talk about bridezillas all the time. Oh God, bridezillas are nothing. Client zilla's are I don't know because I dealt with both. No, clients are worse.

I've dealt with clients with with brides. I could always understand, this is your most this is the most important day in your adult life up to this point. With Brian, do you only have to deal with them up until the wedding and then it's done. I have had clients call my officers and say, you know, it's wet out in the parking lot. Why aren't you do anything about this because it's fucking raining? Okay, so what's the plan? Let me go talk to God real fast. What the fuck do

you want me to do about? No, it's okay. You just go over to Dubai and get the cloud seating, please, cloud seating for technology. I have had some of the worst. Walmart is another horrible one. I used to do I used to staff security for walmarts, the ones like within I don't know four towns of where we live now, and I would get calls from Walmart. Hey, we just shock the cameras. Your guards haven't gone inside at all to night. Do they have the keys? I

said, do you have the keys? Why would they have the keys? We're shut down, so why would they go inside? You know what we're paying you to do? Rounds? Get him out of the car now. So I would call, hey, John, can you get to the car and go do rounds? Bob? The doors are locked? I know, walk up to the door. Then they would stand in front the door and I call, I call the client. Here you watching the camera? Yeah, why is your guy just standing in front of the door he can't get

in? Well? What am I paying you for? You lock the fucking door? What do you want him to do? Yep? Can you explain this to me? Well, I just think there was a miscommunication here. That is the like number one reasoning a client will give you. There's just this been miscommunication, not that I didn't know what I actually wanted done or know nothing about security. You didn't know, So I'm gonna treat you like the dumbest person that's ever existed. Yeah. Yeah, so my last story

before we dive into some of the internet's horror stories. And I know I've told I don't know if I told this on Patreon, if I told this on the main show, But a couple of years ago, I had some very interesting guys working for me on night shift, and I'll stick with interesting. They weren't the great night chief man. Yeah, they weren't the greatest monitoring the gate, but they showed up and they kind of wanted to be

there. That's all you can ask for for third shift security officers. And let's be honest, other managers listen, like, not my night shift, Okay, yeah, you don't know. Go in there and find out. Go in there at three in the morning, you a surprise audit and three in the morning, and then come back to me about that. I've been doing this a decade and I have overseen over three thousand employees. At various points in my career, I've met like four people on night shift. I'm

like, that's a rock star, four of three thousand. So I'm just saying yeah, but it's also the job because the majority of security jobs, like It's funny because in movies they act like security guards make money. Now, on average, it's usually a dollar or two above minimum wage, and it's your very Um, you're pulling teeth if you try to get more. Yeah, it's the only ones who really make more. Are are gonna be contracts that are doing a lot of technical work, and then they're they're gonna

be underpaid for the level of technical work they're doing. And we're not talking about arm security either. Yeah, yeah, that's a whole different ball game. But even arm security, I think is underpaid. Well when it comes to security, I think a lot of people who don't know the industry or know what security does, expects like a cop or military level service. That's

another misunderstanding that happens a lot with security. Not to say that there's not some full on Paul Blarts out there, because there there are, but the expectations of the client and the contract itself. If you do get a contract that, let's say, pays fifteen dollars an hour, you have to do literally ten times the amount of work. Then the contracts like the client's employees. Yeah, and again there are some outliers, but they are very few

and far between. Yeah, but so kind of back to what happened. So we I get a phone call and it's just, hey, Bob, someone broke in and it's been a few years. I'm sure, I'm a I'm sure I told the story better the first time. But they said, someone broke in. We don't know what to do, and I was like, I don't know either. Let me let me come in and see.

Because nine times out of time, when a guard calls at two three in the morning, it's it's not actually what they say, yeah, and you're exhausted, so your brain's like, either they or I am blowing the side of proportion one of the two. So I go into work and on the way and this is one of my brains are realizing some of them was wrong. I start to get phone calls from day shift supervisor, some superintendence, and my officers are calling me again and again and again. It's like,

oh, this, this could be bad. So I end up getting there and the police are there, and these aren't like regular police, like we're talking like a nine units. The whole nine was there, and I'm like, well, what is going on? We got ourselves, sofie, yes, So I go inside and I my guards are clearly shaken up, and I'm like, what the fuck happened? Like, oh well, the cops want to talk to you. So I start talking to the cops and they said, how did this happen? I'm like, I don't even know what's

going on. I just got here. Let's start, you know, square one, and we'll work our way up and through. It took like fifteen people to tell me the full story. But what had happened was a young man hile methamphetamine, walked in the front gate, walked out of the front gate, hopped our fence, which has barbed wire on it, Like this is how you knew he wasn't a sound mind and spirit. He hops the fence and he goes into one of our back office buildings. So how it

works is our back office has two doors. One you can just open up and it has a little waiting room lobby so people can sit in for meetings or they're they're from meeting and someone can come and get him. The second one requires a badge to get into and it's a pretty heavy duty door and it was designed that way purposely because, like the site superintendent, the important people are in this back. Yeah, access to the offices, and this guy gets into the waiting area of the office. Well, he tries to

get in the door. It doesn't work. So he breaks the badge reader off of the wall. And again people see that in movies they think it works. So I'll just brought just break that badge reader. It doesn't work like that any decent security system. Second, that badge reader's broken. Yes, it's been going to lockdown so I can't laugh without okay. He goes in the closet of our break area, which is used for like umbrellas and people's jackets and stuff, and he's like, I've seen mission impossible. I

know what to do. Next. He brings over a chair, breaks open the ceiling tiles, climbs up into the fucking ceiling. Yea, he makes it a good like twenty feet into the office and he falls through the fucking ceiling. Yeah that sounds about right. He gets up and again this is how I knew this dude meant business, but he didn't know which business he was in. So he gets up, he sees our curic and this was like when the business curgs were first. I think, like they really fucking

big ones I could make espresso. He doesn't know how it works, so he ended up smashing no joke, like twenty k cups trying to figure out how to make himself a cup of coffee. Oh my god, I'm again, I don't. I didn't get to speak with him, so I'm assuming kind of what happens next. He gets pissed off that the curate just wasn't

working he needed to do. He goes over to the accounting office and he's like, you know what, I've never I've never used a fire extinguisher, and he proceeds to grab all the fire extinguishers off the fucking wall and sprays the entire we're talking ceiling to floor, sprays the accounting office. I remembered this detail recently, so I don't think I told an the original story because it was in my report and I was reading through my reports. I was

trying to show I have some new people that work. I was trying to show him how to do report writing. He wrote his fucking initials in the fire extinguisher spray, Oh my god, like like he sprayed on the desk and then he wrote his initials with his finger. Okay, so again I'm assuming at this point this young man who was just excited to be there, I think he really wanted a job. He he covers himself and this fire

extinguishing fluid whatever it's called. He gets fucking naked. Oh my god, this about this is the only part is that would have verify because the next off, the next hallway over, I have a camera. He gets budass naked. Oh god, walks into the next hallway and so he kind of looks back at the camera. His member is just a flying around. He looks at the door, and I'm like, oh, he's in my mind. I'm again I knew the end of the story, but I thought I'm

watching it on CCTV. Something's about the change. Nothing changed. He walks towards the door that would go outside, turns around and goes back to the back bathroom. He then takes a shower. Oh my god, gets out of the shower, comes back to the hallway, but ass naked, turns back around and he's dripping wet. Goes back into the bathroom for ten fifteen

minutes. He comes back completely dressed in a uniform for a job. Completely fucking dressed in a uniform it's the only closed available, probably, and then he goes back and tries to make more coffee. He's just wadden through the fire EXTINGUI I don't remember exactly how we caught him in all the other details, but I have never hated a morning meeting more than that one, because I go in and again I have been there at this point all night.

I went home at like five to thirty six. I came back like seven thirty eight o'clock the next morning, and I'm sitting around the office and there's every big wig in the company is all here, yeah, and they're all looking at me, Well, Bob, how did it happen? And I was like, I can tell you, but you're not gonna believe, Like this might be one of those times it's just better off to just say this is probably never gonna happen again, Like we can say that this is never

going to repeat itself ever. And my client's like, that's a pretty good answer, but of course that's not enough for upper management. And I tell him the whole story, and again I'm hoping to elicit some last year, so I'm throwing in the extra. You know, Dick is swinging. I'm throwing in all the extra fucking details, hoping to, you know, alleviate the pressure of this room, because it felt like a fucking submarine. No one laughed a single time. Oh, no, chuckle, no nothing.

And I'm like, okay, tough crowd, crowd um, and that the this is all over and done with. And my client comes out with me and he's he's a great guy. He puts his arm around me, goes hey. I thought that was pretty good, and all I thought the rest of the days like I'm gonna lose my fucking And I didn't have an office at this time, so I'm like up front as these people are signing out

and they're all just staring into my fucking soul. Oh my god, I'm like, oh god, I'll tell you what the people upper management for that company though, Oh buddy, But like I said, I usually if you say meth head dick swinging, it's gonna get it's gonna you know, you're gonna chuck, like how a person are you? If you don't laugh at that? Come on? Yeah, And he did like ten thousand dollars in damage. It was. It was like really bad, and I'm like,

you know, I end up meeting with the client. He's like, hey, like they're pretty unhappy with with security. I'm like, you know what, that's fair. I understand why you're upset with this um, but again, like it's never happened before and it probably won't happen again, at least not while I'm here. Oh god, yeah, it was just that was horrible. Then. My only other nightmares is the amount of time that I've

watched I've given directions to grown men. I've watched their eyes glaze over like their fucking possess, got it. Ten minutes later, I get a phone call, Hey, Bob, that guy you just sit back. Yeah, he just hit a fucking building. Yep. Okay. Now now when you say building, do you like mean no, Like he's in the office. Okay, all right, can you pick up the pace though, Like I gotta finish this zoom call. Yeah. The just that truck drivers scare me

and it's fun. Like I never had a fear of truckers, like when I got my driver's license, like everyone usually has a Ca'm afraid of big riggs. I was because I was, you know, raised in a blue collar household along with some other stuff, farming and that was very common in this area. Yeah, so I was raised, like these guys know what they're doing. No, they don't. Some drivers are Dale Earnheart reincarnated. But they are a small sub section of the trucking population. And again,

I love truckers. I know that they they are the reason that are not saying anything bad about truck driving as an industry. But I'm saying that any real trucker knows exactly what I'm talking about. I had to say they are terrifying. They are terrifying drivers out there. I have to say one company name, and every trucker's gonna say, yep, Swift. Oh yeah, And again I'm not if you drive for Swift, I'm sure you're a great person. Go to a different company. Gave seven and ten years, seventy

percent of my accidents seven zero have been Swift drivers. That is not an exaggerate. I have to know these numbers every single year so I can give them back to the clients so we can decide who we're gonna bring in. Swift just happens to underbid the competition, so they just keep coming. I wonder why they just keep on hitting stuff that's happened. I've had drivers flip over, like legitimately on their top and I get there and the guy's like,

please don't make mad. I'm like, I'm impressed. I'm not a How you have thirty three square feet and aish? How are you on your top? Well? I hit the hurricane block okay, And then I was upside to know you're just skipping some fucking steps in the story. Something happened between you hit it and you were on your top. Well, then I kept hitting it. I just kept going. And if you hasn't never seen a hurricane block, if you flip it on its side, it's kind of

like a ramp. Oh God. So they'll hit them and then they'll keep trying to drive over him. Now what they think is going to happen after they get that stuck in the middle of their truck is beyond me because the amount of times that have had to call a wrecking company to come and say, hey, I have a truck driver on top of the hurricane block that or there's a boulder in between his rear axle yep, how I don't know they'll get there, Bob. How did someone gets happen? I don't know.

It's it's it's more impressive that it happened than the fact that he's now gonna be fucking late, or that happens. Or they will get a hole in their trailer, and I don't mean like a quarter sized hole. I mean they'll hit a piece of metal and drag it for the entire length struck and in. These people who are picking up food grade product will say, can I still give my load? I think I can still deliver? Something tells me no, I don't know what. Call it a Hunch's like I

roll duct tape in the back. It's like, you know what, try it. There have been worse things that have happened, but it's it's nuts. The security industry, it's it's it's been good to me, But it is. Once you get into management and you start to see all the little little things that make the big thing possible, you're like, I should I should leave, I should go back to school, any different career choice.

Yeah, but again, I wouldn't trade this job for many things, because I've done foundry work, I've done welding, I've been in factories working second jobs. While doing this, every other job is harder. It just is that there are a few jobs. That'll be like, oh, yeah, that's easier than security work. You have to be mentally tough to work security. But welding in one hundred and five degree foundry that that was a different

conversation altogether. Yeah, so that's all I've got. I'm gonna throw it to you and let you tell us some of the Internet's like a horror stories again. You know, I've had some scary rounds experiences and stuff like that, but like when I think true horror stories, not much tops the meth head break in. Yeah, that kids, that just goes down in history.

And one day I will pull the pictures off my computer and I'll post him in the facecook but group, because like you guys don't understand actually was fucking carnage that this guy. The what gets me is the k Cups. Everything makes sense, I understand, just being jazzed out of your head like fire extinguisher. I get that. It's the after the fifteenth K Cup. You gotta think maybe it's me. Maybe I'm the drama because this is a problem. Oh god, okay, I'm sorry, go ahead, please,

Okay. So the first time one we're gonna go into is a humanoid creature hangs around the bar at night, no thanks. I worked third shift security at a brewery. My first week of working hair something just fell off. I dismissed it as being a new work environment plausby being alone at night. There are two main buildings on the same property, the brewery and the bar, about two hundred feet away. The third shift guard hangs out the bar

at night since it's a good overlook of the facility. The lights automatically turn off and come on with motion. I was coming back from a patrol around the facility when the lights in the main room and the back room were off, but the door in the back room was open. I walked into the bar like normal, and the lights came on after I took a few steps inside. Then I froze. In that doorway, there was a thing humanoid, but not quite. Its arms were way too long and its hair covered

most of its upper body. The doorway was almost too small for it to get through, but after a few seconds I blinked and it was gone. Apparently I'm not the only one who's seen it. After asking around a bit a few days, few of the dayshift guys seem to know what I'm talking about, but most refused to talk about him. Over the next few weeks, I had a few more run ins with him, but only in the

bar. I thought he couldn't leave it. One of the main public areas inside the brewery has a set of two doors, the outside and the inside doors, kind of like an air lock. When you scan your access card after hours, the doors automatically opened and then close after thirty seconds. The outside door has a tendency to get stuck, though, So I stood in that airlock space, looking outside, waiting for the door to close. The inside door closed at first behind me, then the outside door closed as it

did, I see in the reflection the things standing right behind me. It's towering over me, staring down, long arms hanging at its side. I no longer stayed in that space. When I wait for the doors to close, I go inside, turn on the lights, and then turn around and

wait for the door to close. Nope, nope, nope. So I do understand exactly what he's talking about, though, When you're going through an area and there's an open door and you have to go through dark offices because there's there's something else about dark dark offices all well, so here's the problem is, uh I was doing rounds at the height of like the back rooms.

Oh yeah, and again not the most recent ways, because like the back rooms first became a thing like five, six, seven years ago, and now they made a game and like Mark Aplier kind of like brought the creepy pasta back. But there are a few things like more nerve wracking than thinking you see something in an empty office, dark office building. Yeah, well, because you don't when you're when you're in an office. And I

challenge everyone who works in an office to do this. Next to you go to work, Imagine all the places someone could hide behind if nobody was there and it's pitch black. Police. Don't do that. Don't give yourself anxiety because you don't think about that until you're in a pitch black office and you're like, there there could be a murdering meth head behind any one of these cubicles, a cabinets, underneath the chairs, behind the desk. It's even

more so. We used to have a cardboard cutout of one of the founders of the company that I do security for, and they would move it into like certain area. I think it was like if they did x amount of like good sales or something. They would get the cutout. It's a weird little fucking thing they were doing. But when you round a corner and you just see this creepy old dude smiling at you from your flashlight, You're like, I will fuck you up, will burn you to the gorn out stone.

Cold Steve Auston kicks in the background. You can't yeah rounds And it's weird because like when you're training somebody, there's no scare to it, right, but then they do it themselves and like you almost always get that text w new Guard, this ship's kind of creepy. Oh yeah, like yeah, yeah, yeah, I could see this. Yeah all right, so this one just says medical school. I've worked here for at least three years. It was around eleven PM and I finished clearing all the floors. I

went in the elevator and pressed the button for the ground floor. On my way down, the elevator stopped. The doors opened to a dark and empty floor. There's nobody there, but I was sure. I'm sure there's nobody there. I just cleared that floor, So why did the elevator stop? The first time? I thought the elevator is malfunctioning, but it happened repeatedly, sometimes even for days in a row. Students who use the elevator during

the day don't experience this problem. It only ever happens at night. Every time the door opens, I get goosebumps because it feels like someone just walked in or got on the elevator with me. As this event has now become part of my job, I got used to it these days. That the elevator ever opens on that floor, I just step aside and give space to whoever or whatever wants to ride down with me. Nope, I've seen supernatural again. Now I'm shooting with the shot. Well, I was gonna say,

back to that last story. I am two seasons deep in a supernatural I'm nuquely qualified to handle this. I will just burn the bones with salt exactly. There you go. Yeah, see this one. My problem is I would have to report this to maintenance because I'd be pissed as a manager if they're like, Bob, I didn't tell you it was a ghost. Oh yeah, but no, no, we have a file, a fucking report, buddy. We gotta get this fixed. There's something wrong with that

elevator. But if you ever worked a contract that had an elevator that like you had to actively use for rounds. No, No, I think I'm trying to think. I feel like riding an elevator and opening opening to just darkness would be fucking scary. Yeah, i'd snap somebody. Yeah, something about that just doesn't Now that's not sitting right. This story just got way scarier than now that I imagine myself having to do that. No, thank

you. Okay, So the next one we're gonna do is they avoided the room with an old hospital and in a hold hospital that contain boxes with radiation and symbols. Yeah, that's smart. Yeah, don't do that. Back in the eighties, I worked security to pay for college. I got put at a closed hospital. It was about twenty floors and they wanted you to watch each floor at the start in middle of the shift. Oh my god.

Okay, that reminds me of one I worked a contract and this was like, I mean this buildings like half a mile like the entire facility is. And when I got there as a flex because with the company I worked with initially, if you got there's a FlexIt it want to work the shift, you'd say hey, I'm leaving. I got there, they said, hey, we're gonna have you do rounds tonight. I was like, cool, no problem, I get the golf cart. No, you do them on foot. And I said, okay, how many on foot? This

place is huge? Are you sure? How many rooms? How many floors? Well ended up being like fourteen different buildings, and it was something like, so, how rounds work with some companies. Does you have these little dots to scan to prove that you were actually there? Yeah? It was over three hundred of them. Oh nope, and on average, rounds took four hours. So I was like, hey, I'm going home. You guys that have covered this alone, I'm not doing this, and I just

fucking left. Yeah. I don't blame you, absolutely not. So it took about two and a half hours to do the entire rounds. Yeah, it was like the set for one of the old horror movies. Most of the lights did not work, and there were ceiling towels hanging down all over the place. It was still full of unwanted equipment, and since it was winter and the steam heat was on, there were noises on each floor. One night, I was on the fifteenth floor, and heard a loud crash

down one of the side corridors. That freaked me out. Turned out a pipe in the ceiling was leaking and the ten ceiling towels all let go at the same time. Probably the creeps was walking through the eighteenth floor because it had these all tiled operating rooms that had observation windows around at the top. Oh god, no, I'd like I was being watched the entire No. I would avoid that room also, and all the operating tables and other equipment

were still in there. I only went to the twentieth floor one time. I don't know if they did cancer treatments there or what, but when I walked through there there were boxes with radiation symbols. So I just decided the nineteenth floor was good enough. I mean, I don't risk yourself for these

companies guys. Yeah. No, See, I hate that so much because there was a there was a time I was doing rounds and I walked around the corner and there was a giant warning saying that this building was built before X date. So the walls and ceilings are lined with and what what like? Made me say, fuck this building is? I went I went through the door I shut the door, and the ceiling tiles moved, and it dropped all this dust right onto my head into my hair. Nope, absolutely

not. Yeah, So okay, I out one more here and then we're gonna call it a weekend. So in my six years here, I've experienced a lot of things at night, But the one thing I can't ever forget was what I saw in broad daylight. It was twelve pm and I was scoring to Facebook to kill time. I looked up from my phone and noticed a man sitting on the stairway. The man was clearly not a student. He was sitting on a step with his head bowed, long black hair covering

his face. He wore a blue Polo shirt and blue Spartan slippers. I stared at him, and he didn't move an inch, even while students walk right by him. The man was definitely a bit creepy, I thought, but he might have just been a worker who had some renovation on campus. Later on, I noticed that the man was gone. As I passed those stairs, I asked students who in the classes nearby if they knew who the man was. They all gave me the same answer, who There was nobody

there? I tried to describe the man, telling them that he sat on the stairs for a long time, but all of them attested that there was nobody there and he had no idea what he was talking about. I quit. Yeah, my bullshit level for security versus high, strangest, there's two vastly different things when it comes to like being in caves and seeing a potentially holographic bear. You know, maybe that might have been summoned or may have

not been summoned by fellow Grandpa the show who knows. But I my bullshit level for security was so low it's not even funny. Yeah. Well, the last thing I want to talk about is I was working for a company and I was kind of overseeing the entire region because because what you'll learn with security companies, especially work for him, the management tends to cycle very often,

like the upper management does. And it's because a lot of these companies they head hunt from each other and every new company, every new company will often pay way more just to get these people in. Yeah, that than the longer running established company as well. And I was overseeing this entire regent and I got a phone call. Um, it was at a parking garage down in Dayton, and it was It was kind of funny because the guy

had been a site manager for seven eight years before this. The client shows a different company going forward, so he was just kind of doing flex work and working wherever so he can make as close to his original paycheck as he could. And he calls he was, hey, what do I do if I think someone's dead? Oh my god? And I was like, what do you what do you mean? What do you mean? You like, you're You're in a parking garage, so that shouldn't be there a dead person.

And he's like, well, I walked I was doing rounds and I walked up on this guy who was laying out spread eagle at like the base of the like third or fourth floor, I remember which one it was. And he's like, my concern is someone comes through here, they're going to hit him with a car. And I was like, yeah, that's a that's a valid concern. Just wake him up and tell him to get out

here. Because like there was like a transient homeless problem, which is why we get hired in the first place, was they were like setting up tent camps. And well, he goes over to the guy and I will never forget this because it was I've never fired someone so quickly because it was on the phone, and you know better than I hate doing it over the phone. He walks over and I hear doom, and then I hear a man moaning he fucking kicked him in the like in the ribs with steel toe boots

on. And he's like, well, if he was dead, he wouldn't have felt that, so and I was like, I literally pulled the phone away from my face. I said, pack your shit, you're gone, You're fired. He's like, what do you mean. I was like, you just kicked a fucking homeless man. I get down there. He wasn't even homeless. So he works for a company who does like drywall paving,

and they use that parking garage. He was drunk coming home from the bar and thought he parked his car there, was looking for the looking for his car, walking up this parking garage and passed out because he had drunk too much. Kick this dude, so I fired him. RS like, don't you think you acted a little quick. I'm like, he kicked a human beings. I thought it was okay and thought that was acceptable behavior. I've met some of the most interesting and some of the best people doing security,

but I've also met some of the fucking worst. Security is such a broad spectrum topic. I can understand where a lot of people would get confused because a lot of these situations you don't know what to do until it happens. Yeah, life or death. You don't know what to do if there is a break, and you don't really know what to do if there's an accident, like you have to. It's a learn as you go kind of job, and that is one of the things that really sucks about it. But

I have the common deason say not to kick somebody. Yeah, the thing is common sense and common decency in this field, it's not so common at all. I was shocked by that. It's so rare, it's not even funny. Yeah, I've had that. I've had I've had my own guards. Like, we've had people die out in their trucks. The worst one

ever was a guy that picked up a lot lizard. And if you guys aren't familiar with what that is. Um, certain ladies of the night will go in frequent places like loves or pilot truck stops, and they will charge money for their services. Or food or food. Well, this guy, he lied. Initially he told our guards that, oh, well that's my fiance or wife, I remember which one it was. Um, No, he told you first that he didn't know her. That's right, didn't know

her. Then it was wife fiance I think, and then I just yeah. Anyway, he ends up telling us I picked her up down the road. Well, he's in our staging area waiting. She has a fucking heart attack and dies in his truck. They call he He doesn't know what to do, so he comes and tells the like twenty year old security guard, Hey, there's a dead woman in my truck, and I'm like, what the actual fuck? So she calls me. We end up calling the police.

We get he gets the body out of there, and has the audacity to looked me square in the face and say, so, can I still pick up or does disqualify me from your facility? Oh my god, I wanted to punch him in his fucking throat when he said that. I had that And the last thing I want to talk about before we go once. This is a couple of summers ago. I get a call from a woman

that I trust her to put truck drivers in place. She's about four foot nine, she's older, and she's the scariest person talking about Yeah, but she's super no nonsense, like she's not the type to ever exaggerate, like if it happens, that happens, yeah, and every super black white She goes, hey, Bob, are you busy? I was like, Oh, I'm never too busy for you. What do you need? I need you to come out with me and look at a trailer and I said,

Okay, that's weird because your department doesn't deal with trailers. I think there's something dead in there, like something, Well, it's probably a dead body. Could you do you have a gun? And I'm like, I'll be there in a minute. So I get over there and she gets in the truck and I was like, how did all this go about? She goes, oh, I was driving out to the project area, and as I was driving, I caught a whiff of something horrid, like absolutely fucking terrible.

And I walked up to this truck and there are flies buzzing around. Now she at this point again didn't tell me the full story. So we get to the truck or the trailer rather it's a drop trailer and there is a like an army of flies around the back of this trailer, and you could smell it like windows up in the truck, but you could smell smell it. Yeah, So I go and I get my cutters. We open it up, and she's like, if there's a dead body in here,

I'm taking vacation the rest of the day, Like I'm going home. You gotta deal with this. We opened it up, and what it ended up being was the year before, there was a rejected trailer full of eggs and it was still there. They left it there and it smelled like a dead body. So it was like a good ninety nine hundred degree day middle of the summer. And I freak out because when I opened it up, all I could see were like stacked boxes, like Corget pallets on top of Corget

boxes on top of stacked pallets. So I'm like some my my mind is racing. I go full criminal minds, like they chopped up a body, it's shoved it in the boxes. I climb up there and I see these eggs with insects and them. That's I had to decide how to say that because it was disgusting. I hopped down, I do a little investigation. Well, what had happened was it costs like fifteen grand to get rid of all this stuff for some reason or another, I don't know what the reasoning

was. And their answer was instead of paying it, they would just have the yard jockey move it every few days so the guards didn't flag it for sitting in the same place for too long. Are you serious? Dead serious? And they end up getting getting it getting rid of it. What had happened is this smell and the boxes that started to deteriorate, It ate into the wood of the trailer, so the trailer was ruined. They had to pay for the entire trailer. That's what you get for me and so stingy.

Yeah, and it's one of those things that I work for a billion with a B, one of, if not the largest, most private companies in the entire world. And that was their mentality. And it really opened my eyes that day, like, oh, we just really don't fucking care at all. This is terrifying, terrifying. But with that being said, Misspni, that's all I for security horror stories. Again, if you guys want to keep up a phantom farm, you guys want to watch it first

before everyone else does. Join the Patreon one dollar which you guys started to get you guys access. We do add free episodes, extra episodes, We do all kinds of fun stuff over there. And that's all I've got unless you're everything else that you'd like to add. Well, if that being said, I think we want to add this episode of Security Guard horror stories to our never ending but are always growing tales from the Dark

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