Counting drinks is a common strategy that many people use to try to drink less, but it can often backfire and leave you feeling frustrated and ashamed. While it can be a useful awareness-raising tool in the beginning, relying on external rules and numbers disconnects you from your own inner authority and doesn't address the unconscious desires driving your drinking. Instead of trying to become a perfect rule-follower, the key to lasting change is developing a strong sense of authority over yours...
Oct 15, 2024•20 min•Ep. 399
Do you ever wish you could just be a "normal" drinker? Do you fantasize that if you could fix your drinking, you'd finally feel okay about yourself? The truth is, becoming a normal drinker isn't really about the alcohol. It's about the story we tell ourselves - that if we can just change this one thing, we'll be worthy and whole. Spoiler alert: it doesn't work that way. In this episode, I dive into the fantasy of normal drinking and share the worst and best news about what it really takes to cha...
Oct 08, 2024•23 min•Ep. 398
How many problems in your increasingly complex life can be solved by a one-size-fits-all solution? Not many. And yet, society insists on prescribing such an approach when it comes to drinking less. Everyone’s relationship with alcohol is different, and the only way to change your habit is by finding an individualized approach. But how? It all starts with discovering the root cause of your drinking. That’s why I’m so excited to announce that my book, The Ultimate Guide to Drinking Less, is offici...
Oct 01, 2024•20 min•Ep. 397
Do you like being alone? It’s a simple question that can offer great insight into your relationship with alcohol, which is why today’s episode revisits this crucial concept. If you have a low tolerance for solitude, you likely seek out distractions instead of spending time alone, including pouring a drink. But if you could actually learn to enjoy this time, you might be able to change that habit. Listen in to learn how the quality of your thoughts when alone impacts your feelings and actions (th...
Sep 24, 2024•31 min•Ep. 396
No matter where you are on your journey to changing your relationship with drinking, there’s one question you’ll need to be prepared to answer—and it’s one that you may struggle with or dread: “Do you want a drink?” While you’re trying to find the perfect response, you might actually be missing out on why saying no is so difficult in the first place. Luckily, there is a simple technique that can help you. Listen in to learn this practice, specifically what to notice after saying no, why you shou...
Sep 10, 2024•17 min•Ep. 395
Does there always seems to be chatter in your brain about alcohol? Whether you should drink tonight, whether you should have just one more, or any of the questions you ask yourself after a night of drinking. You might be surprised to hear it has nothing to do with how much you drink. It’s a result of how your brain is structured and how you’re socialized. And once you understand the why, you can learn how to quiet the chatter. Listen to learn why this chatter is normal and how it can be used as ...
Sep 03, 2024•30 min•Ep. 394
You may have asked yourself the morning after a long night of drinking or while sitting across from someone sipping their first cocktail as you finish your third: "Why can’t I drink like everyone else?" But what if your drinking has little to do with alcohol? Instead, what if it's a matter of coping with your humanness? In that case, the problem is actually the conversations our society has about drinking. Tune in to discover why our one-size-fits-all approach to drinking interferes with your ab...
Aug 27, 2024•24 min•Ep. 393
Humans have a long history of using alcohol for medicinal purposes. While drinking can often numb your pain in the moment, it actually creates more stress on the body. When we repeatedly turn to alcohol for relief from insomnia, chronic pain, or other ailments, our brains start to believe that drinking is the only way out of suffering. But in reality, alcohol increases inflammation in the body, disrupts sleep, and diverts energy away from healing. Tune in to today’s episode to learn about this D...
Aug 20, 2024•29 min•Ep. 392
If you find yourself constrained by your life and living up to expectations of who you should be, you’re not alone. You spend so much time adhering to societal conventions that, every once in a while, it can feel freeing to rebel against the rules—by pouring a drink and living uncensored. Having a drink to let go of pressure and expectations can feel good in the moment, but this is The Release—one of the eight Drink Archetypes—in action, and it teaches your brain that alcohol is needed to cope w...
Aug 13, 2024•32 min•Ep. 391
When you're bored it’s easy to be tempted by a drink. After all, a little buzz can help pass the time. But have you ever considered what your brain learns when you do this? You might be surprised to discover that the faster you reach for a drink when you’re bored by what you’re doing, the more intolerable boredom becomes. This is what happens when The Hourglass—one of the eight Drink Archetypes—is activated. In today's episode, learn more about what The Hourglass teaches your brain and what you ...
Aug 06, 2024•33 min•Ep. 390
Humans have a long history of using alcohol as “liquid courage.” But did you know this can actually make your insecurities and anxiety worse? The Mask is one of eight Drink Archetypes, and it teaches your brain to associate a buzz with feeling confident around others. But when it feels like a drink is necessary to have fun, saying no will interfere with your desire to feel confident and enjoy yourself, making it difficult to abstain or moderate. In this week’s episode, discover why the short-ter...
Jul 30, 2024•29 min•Ep. 389
There are no shortages of pop-culture examples in which someone is seen drinking to numb their pain—likely because people have been using alcohol to drown their sorrow for centuries. But the fact is, doing so can prevents you from coping effectively. The Escape is one of eight Drink Archetypes and it teaches your brain that whatever negative situation or series of events happening in your life is too much to handle. You’re then caught in a cycle of using alcohol more frequently (and in greater q...
Jul 23, 2024•29 min•Ep. 388
The concept of drinking to relax is nothing new. It goes hand-in-hand with the belief that you deserve a drink—whether it’s after a hard day’s work or because it’s your “me time” routine. In reality, using alcohol as a treat can backfire. The Reward is one of the eight Drink Archetypes, and it can wrongly teach your brain that alcohol is the only way to unwind as well as convince you that drinking is a permission to stop working or to make time for yourself. Tune in to this episode to gain a dee...
Jul 16, 2024•23 min•Ep. 387
Humans have long used alcohol’s ability to facilitate bonding by lowering people’s defenses. But you may be surprised to discover that when alcohol becomes your go-to way to open up, it can actually block your ability to connect with others (even with those you feel close to). The Connector is one of the eight Drink Archetypes, and not only does it teach the brain that alcohol helps you lower your guard around others, but it may also leave you worried that a potential change to your drinking cou...
Jul 09, 2024•26 min•Ep. 386
If you're someone who often reaches for a drink because “it would make things more special,” then you may recognize The Upgrade drink archetype—one of eight unconscious patterns that influence why you drink. Identifying this pattern is the first step in changing your relationship with alcohol. The next is understanding how The Upgrade impacts what your brain is learning. For instance, the desire to use alcohol to elevate an experience teaches your brain to associate drinking with a reward and, a...
Jul 02, 2024•35 min•Ep. 385
Believe it or not, overindulgence is a part of the human experience. So why is it that you consider this natural impulse to be negative? Whether it’s drinking, eating, spending or something else, it's easy to associate overindulgence with your character and make it mean something negative about you. Throw in the societal and moral baggage, and this belief really hinders your attempts to change. It can lead to a vicious cycle—one in which you cease being curious about why you’re drinking and, ins...
Jun 25, 2024•20 min•Ep. 384
If you routinely drink too much, should you just stop drinking? What if you keep drinking, even though, deep down, you don’t believe you can moderate? These are fraught questions that often bring up a lot of fear and shame. Sometimes the most powerful thing you can do is to approach the question from a different angle. In order to do this, you must explore the contradiction underlying the habit. Everyone walks around with contradictions inside them. You say you want to lose weight, but you keep ...
Jun 04, 2024•11 min•Ep. 383
Listen to Rachel’s conversation with Kara Loewentheil, a Master-Certified Life Coach and author of Take Back Your Brain: How a Sexist Society Gets in Your Head and How to Get It Out. Together, they discuss some of the hidden reasons why you might reach for a drink when you’re feeling anxious at a party, overworked, afraid of making mistakes, or wanting to avoid disappointing someone. Discover why the first step to stopping any behavior that feels compulsive has nothing to do with creating the “p...
May 21, 2024•38 min•Ep. 382
You want to change your relationship with drinking, but other than listening to the podcast, you’re not doing anything about it. This paralysis, while frustrating, is actually very normal. Explore the three reasons this happens and how they relate to your cravings, your beliefs about failure, and your vision of the future. Discover why your unwillingness to act isn’t illogical but actually an important piece of how the habit works. In this episode, you’ll find a new perspective that will help ma...
May 14, 2024•24 min•Ep. 381
Who cares? How many times have you poured yourself a drink after silently uttering these words to yourself? If you’re like most people, the answer is a lot. Hidden behind “Who cares?” is a powerful tension that, if revealed, will help you say no to your cravings. Tune in and discover why this particular excuse is so good at sabotaging your commitment and what’s actually required in order to successfully change your relationship with alcohol. Do you know your drink type? Take the free Drink Arche...
May 07, 2024•10 min•Ep. 380
You know the scenario. You promised not to drink tonight… but by 5 o’clock, you’re ready for a drink. Or you told yourself you would only have one drink at happy hour, but then your friend suggests another round. “I’ll be good tomorrow” is an excuse you’ve probably told yourself many times before. Why is it so easy to fall into this trap, even when you have plenty of evidence that tomorrow you’ll wish you had said no? Tune in and discover why this excuse is so insidious and the best way to comba...
Apr 30, 2024•7 min•Ep. 379
In this episode, we cover a scenario that may be familiar. You start drinking and then convince yourself to continue because "Why stop now?" This mindset isn't just about alcohol; it can also happen with food and spending. Many of us develop a habit of letting things like an empty glass or a finished package override our feelings of fullness. Listen to understand why we make this excuse and how to stop, even after you've begun. Learning to stop is a key step in teaching your brain to manage crav...
Apr 23, 2024•12 min•Ep. 378
In this episode, we tackle a familiar scenario: you've made progress in reducing your drinking, but then a special celebration comes up. So, how do you stay on track with your commitment? The answer isn’t what you may expect. Discover how your Drink Archetypes, especially The Upgrade, can act like blinders in these moments and the exact question to ask yourself to change your perspective. Remember, working with your excuses around special occasions is about moving toward pleasure, not away from ...
Apr 16, 2024•7 min•Ep. 377
We all face moments where life doesn’t match our expectations. We often feel this most acutely when trying to change our relationship with alcohol. In this episode, you’ll hear about the universality of the thought, “This is not what my life is supposed to look like.” Explore the connection between this thought and various Drink Archetypes. You’ll come to understand that its presence goes beyond any specific archetype. Discover how this reflection on our lives is deeply tied to our current state...
Apr 09, 2024•17 min•Ep. 376
If you’re like most people, you’ve probably told yourself if you had more willpower, it would be easier to drink less. This episode delves into the limitations of willpower and why it often falls short. Discover the skill set most people overlook when trying to drink less. You’ll also learn about the eight Drink Archetypes, and how they fit into your struggle with self-discipline. Walk away with tools that make it easier to keep your commitments. Join the challenge, Drink Less in 5 Days starting...
Apr 02, 2024•26 min•Ep. 375
Have you ever thought that if you could just figure out how to stay motivated, then it would be easier to say no to a drink? You’re not alone. Motivation is a concept that many grapple with. This episode sheds light on where motivation comes from and how to find more of it. Learn the real reason your progress is slower than you want it to be. Uncover how to change more effectively with some simple questions to ask yourself. Take the free Drink Archetype quiz and learn the specific tools to drink...
Mar 26, 2024•11 min•Ep. 374
Pouring a drink at the end of the day can be a treat. But it can easily sabotage your goal of changing your relationship with alcohol. Especially if you have a love-hate relationship with your desire for rewards. This episode will help you stop framing the reward you want as good or bad. Instead, you’ll learn why it’s important to view the desire for a drink as neutral, and how that can help you tap into the inner workings of the habit. Discover the real problem when it comes to wanting to rewar...
Mar 19, 2024•10 min•Ep. 373
Using alcohol as a remedy for a hangover is so common that it has its own term: “the hair of the dog.” Discover why some people swear by this and what’s really happening when you drink to feel better. This episode explains the real reason hangovers feel bad (it’s not what you think). We explore why so many people promise “never again” after a hangover, only to go back on their word. And we examine why you should be a scientist—not a moralist—when you’re looking for relief. Get the full show note...
Mar 12, 2024•17 min•Ep. 372
Revisit (or listen for the first time) to the celebration of our 100th episode of the Take a Break podcast. In this episode I’m comb through the archives of the past 99 episodes and pull out some of the most important concepts and lessons from each episode. This is an excellent review for you to look at what your next layer of work is and if you’re a new listener, you’re getting the best overview you could possibly get to help you figure out which episodes you need/want to dig deeper into first....
Mar 05, 2024•38 min•Ep. 100
If you’ve ever thought, “Once I start, I can’t stop”—you’re not alone. Lots of people find it easier not to drink at all than to moderate. But if don’t want to stop drinking forever, then you must be willing to challenge this belief. Yes, alcohol is an intoxicant and if you consume enough it will impair your judgment. But you might discover that you’re checking out long before this happens. There’s a paradox embedded in “Once I start, I can’t stop.” The more you believe you can’t trust yourself,...
Feb 27, 2024•17 min•Ep. 371
