'Shame at my life' Listener question

I wanted to ask you or maybe just see your thoughts around something that happened for me yesterday. 

They were a job rejection and a strong angry reaction to a FB post that was about repeating days over and over not being a life.​  I see that reaction speaks directly to my own shame and embarrassment that my life seems to be just that - repeated, wasted days. 

Later that night I woke with thoughts of shame and disappointment of how my life seems to have turned out, that I am wasting my life and embarrassed of the perceived barriers that lay heavy on any creativity or potential.  I compare myself to the collective "them" who are so much more worthy, useful and successful and the old me who could do the things I can't.   So separate and lacking. 

I felt anger rise up and in my mind I am smashing against the walls that surround me and screaming as loud as I can.  This was in my mind as my husband would have a start, but I silently screamed. I was reminded of something you had said about hitting at walls made of nothing but thin air.     

​​​​​​​Today I don't feel different about my situation. I think I know what has to happen, VOICE was so brilliant and started me down that path.  I just don't know who I am, I feel a bit lost.