Northside/Southside Radio Players: Sam Spade "Murder& Mistletoe" - podcast episode cover

Northside/Southside Radio Players: Sam Spade "Murder& Mistletoe"

Dec 21, 202533 minSeason 7Ep. 114
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Summary

Newlyweds Monica and Frank arrive at Aunt Matilda's mansion on Christmas Eve, only to find her murdered. As Chief Hanson investigates, a series of hidden wills surface, implicating various family members, until the surprising true culprit is revealed. A final twist regarding the time of death changes everything for the young couple.

Episode description

Northside/Southside Radio Players of Chicago are back and they ppresent "Murder& Mistletoe" just in time for Christmas! "Murder & Mistletoe" was written by Juliet Youngren and features the following cast members: Monica: Sherri Berger; Frank: Dennis Newport; Libby: Kate LeVan; Jenkins the butler: Michael Hagedorn; Percival the Pekingese: Carol Seymour. Directed by Carol Seymour. Sound effects: Pam Frederick. Music: David Drazin. Announcer: Marshall Rubin.

Newlyweds Monica and Frank visit Monica's wealthy Aunt Matilda on Christmas Eve to break the news that Monica has married Frank against her aunt's wishes, which threatens Monica's inheritance. A whodunit with a twist.

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Transcript

Intro / Opening

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Episode Introduction and Setting the Scene

your weekly release of brand new audio drama from the United Artists of Audio right here on the Mutual Audio Network. The following audio drama is rated PG for parental guidance recommended. Our second play, Murder and Mistletoe, was written by Juliet Youngren of Champaign-Urbana. And now, Murder and Mistletoe. It's late afternoon on Christmas Eve.

Newlyweds Monica and Frank Simmons stand on the doorstep of a luxurious mansion in the country. The mansion belongs to Matilda Van Horn, Monica's aunt. A light snow is falling as Monica hesitates with her finger on the doorbell. Well, darling, are you going to ring the bell or not? I will. I'm just nervous. Are you sure about this? Yes. Just give me a minute to get ready. Is it going to be so hard to tell your aunt we got married?

I'm just not looking forward to the fight. She'll probably disinherit me again. Oh, again? You mean she's done it before? She's always disinheriting people when she's mad at them. Oh, but why should she disinherit you? I thought I was excellent husband material, if I say so myself. Rising young lawyer, fabulously good-looking nonsmoker. Aunt Matilda just doesn't like you. Oh, you keep saying that. I thought she was very nice when you brought me down here last summer. Ah, that.

was how I knew she hated you. See, if she liked you, she would have insulted you all afternoon, then run you over with her car. All right, then. I'll win her over with my unstoppable charm. The air will be blue with insults by this time tomorrow. Charm won't work on Aunt Matilda. She either likes you or hates you, and sometimes both in the same week. Well, then if she hated me last summer, she should love me by now. She should, but she doesn't.

Oh, I can't figure it out, Frank. This is the first time she's ever felt the same way about somebody for five whole months. Oh, she's always liked you, hasn't she? Well, yes, but she usually only saw me for a few days at a time. After my parents died, she sent me to boarding school most of the...

the year. Look, are you sure you want to do this? We can still get a hotel room or something? Sure, yes, yes, I'm sure. Anyway, the taxi's gone and the next ho- nearest hotel is five miles from here. Well, let's get it over with then. I'm freezing. Yeah. Okay. Here goes. Ah, good afternoon, Miss Monica. No, Jenkins. It's Mrs. Monica now. Indeed.

Glad to hear it, Mom. Frank, this is Jenkins, who's been Aunt Matilda's butler and generally run the house for as long as I can remember. Jenkins, this is Frank Simmons, my husband. Pleased to make your acquaintance, sir. If I might make an observation, it is not financially efficient to keep the door open in such cold weather.

If you would care to come in. Of course. May I take your coats? Miss Cole is in the library if you wish to join her. Who's Miss Cole? My cousin Libby. You'll like her. She's an actress. Meanwhile... I will inform your aunt that you have arrived. Well, here we are. Ooh, I see they've decorated the place for Christmas. Oh, it looks wonderful. I especially like the tinsel around the Rembrandt and the holly and the mink vases.

and hanging from the antique chandelier. Mistletoe. The biggest ball I've ever seen. Shall we try it out? Yeah, it works very well. I think the chandelier gives it a special zing. Let's try it again. Oh, it's a huge, ferocious dust bunny. Meet Percival at Matilda's Pekingese. She's crazy about him. Hello, Percival. Good boy. He's never liked me for some reason. I wouldn't take it personally. Well...

Come and meet Libby. The library's just through this door. Hi, Monica. Hi, Libby. This is Frank. Frank Libby. Pleased to meet you. Monica, is that a wedding ring? When did you get married? This afternoon. That's wonderful. Congratulations. Thanks. So, you're Frank. I've heard a lot about you. Nothing good, I hope. Well, most of it came from Aunt Matilda, so actually...

It wasn't. Hey, where is she anyway? She's been in bed with a cold, which is fine with me. Oh, no. She's been in one of her moods. Oh, dear. Oh, don't worry, Monica. It'll be okay. Say, there are all these books first editions. Yes, they are. Now put your tongue back in your mouth. I'm sorry. I just love this house. That's all. So, you're a lawyer, Frank. That's right. What's it like?

Well, not so bad. It's a little hard starting out, waiting for the big case that will make people sit up and take notice. Kind of like acting. Yeah, I guess it is. Oh, well, can we give you a hand with those packages, Libby? Yeah, please. I'm trying to sort them into piles.

by who they're for. Did you wrap all these? Oh, no. I found them under the bed in one of the guest rooms. Aunt Matilda wrapped them and then forgot to put them under the tree. That sounds like something she'd do. Well, here's one for you, Monica. And one for Libby. It looks like she forgot who this one was for. The tag says, to whom it may concern. Oh, put it with Percival's presence. The big pile, over there. Pardon me.

Aunt Matilda's Murder

But I regret to announce that your aunt appears to have been murdered. What? Murdered? I'm afraid so. Did someone break in? I believe not, Mom. As far as I can ascertain, a toxic substance was added to her habitual cup of afternoon cocoa. Oh, that's horrible! Has anyone called the police? I took the liberty. Three officers and the coroner are presently occupied in investigating the scene that is your aunt's bedroom.

Three officers. Wow. They sent out the entire force. One of them will be down shortly to conduct an investigation. Meanwhile, may I infer that there will be one less for dinner? Yes, Jenkins, you may. Very good, Mom. Well, he seemed pretty calm about it. He's paid to be calm. Oh, poor Aunt Matilda. Oh, come on.

You and I both know she was incredibly difficult to live with. I must be in shock. I should be crying or something, but I don't feel like it. Oh, this just doesn't seem real. Well, maybe it isn't. Maybe we're all just characters in a play. Nah, if we were, we'd react more. I was in a murder mystery once, and when the murder was announced, we were all supposed to wail and carry on a lot.

Of course, in that play... Oh, please stop babbling, Libby. Sorry. It's my way of dealing with stress. Look at it this way, Monica. Now you don't have to break the bad news to your aunt, and she won't disinherit you. Is that all you can think about, Frank? Well, I'm... Sorry, your aunt died, but you have to admit, it was good timing. And if she just happens to leave you this house... For your information, she probably won't. She makes a new will out just about once a month.

I can't believe you can be so mercenary. Hey, calm down. Don't you care that someone has just been murdered? Well, I only met the woman once. Besides, in my job, you get used to murders. This is a sight of you I've never seen, and I'm not sure I like it. It's not what you think. Well, it sure looks like it. Mr. Benjamin Hanson, Chief of Police.

Chief Hanson's Initial Investigation

Evening, everyone. My name's Hanson. No, he just said that. Sorry. This is my first murder case, so please bear with me. I'd like to ask all of you a few questions. I know we all have other things to do, so I'll keep this as quick as I can. I'm looking forward to filling up my granddaughter's stocking and finishing an Agatha Christie novel myself. Now, which one of you made the call? I did, sir.

And you are Albert Jenkins, the late Mrs. Van Horn's butler. That is correct. And you reported that Mrs. Van Horn died at exactly 325 p.m. today. Mind telling me how you knew that? Certainly, sir. When she was taken ill, she most fortuitously knocked over her bedside alarm clock, which subsequently broke.

It stopped at 25 minutes past 3 o'clock. So why didn't we find it when we searched the scene? My dear sir, I would consider myself derelict in my duty if I were to leave a broken clock just lying about. If you would care to check the garbage bin, you will find it as I have described. Uh-huh. And the rest of you are? I'm Monica Simmons, Mrs. Van Horn's niece. This is my husband, Frank, and my cousin, Libby Cole.

And you're the only ones in the house? At the moment. Unless you count Percival. Oh, yeah? Who's Percival? Oh, Percival is a Pekingese. I hardly think he counts. No, I don't think so either. Now... Tell me about the cocoa. When did she ask for it? In the wintertime, it was always her custom to drink a cup of cocoa at about three o'clock in the afternoon. Who made the cocoa? I did. Tell me how you made it.

I took a spoonful of powdered cocoa mix and added hot water. Tap water? That is correct. So the poison couldn't have been in the water. Where does the cocoa mix come from? From the store? No, after that. From a large canister in the kitchen cupboard. Did she have some yesterday? I believe so. Then the poison must have been added sometime after three yesterday afternoon.

Then what happened? I started to take the tray upstairs, but I met Miss Cole, who offered to take it in to her. Uh-huh. I'd like to see this canister of cocoa. Would you bring it in? Certainly, sir. Now, Ms. Cole, would you like to tell us what happened after you took the tray for Mr. Jenkins? Sure. I went straight upstairs. Aunt Matilda was sitting up in bed with Percival on her lap.

and talking on the phone to aunt marge she told me to put the tray on the bedside table this was at three just about then what did you do i left but she didn't drink the cocoa until 3 25. What was she doing in those 25 minutes? If you'd ever talked to my Aunt Marge, you wouldn't ask. I see. The canister of cocoa as you requested. Give it here. Let's see what's in there. I'll have to keep this for evidence and send it to the lab to be tested. Smells like cocoa, though.

Looks like Cocoa. Except, what the? There's a piece of paper in here. Oh, well, well, well. What do you know? It's a will. What the hell is a will doing in the Cocoa? Well, that's typical. Aunt Matilda is, I mean, was unbelievably absent-minded. Uh-huh. Well, let's have a look at it. This is what is known as a holistic will. written in the deceased's own handwriting on a sheet of unlined paper. It says, I, Matilda Van Horn, leave all my possessions to my darling...

Janky Wanky. My darling who? Janky Wanky? You mean Jenkins? She used to call me that sometimes when she was... Oh, Jenkins. I can't believe it. You and Aunt Matilda? It was a short but very pleasant interlude, Mom. Well, I'd say this case is pretty clear. You had access to the cocoa. You could easily have added the poison to it at any time, and you have a motive. I can see it all. Once the affair was over, you nursed a grudge. When you found the will made out in your favor, that just frosted it.

You would get your revenge and all Mrs. Van Horn's money in one stroke.

Uncovering More Wills and Suspects

Wasn't it Shakespeare who said, Hell hath no fury like a butler scorned? Shakespeare didn't say that. Well, maybe it was Agatha Christie. Believe me, sir. I felt no resentment, and I never saw that will. Oh, easy to say. Don't say another word, Jenkins. I'm a lawyer. I can take your case. This could be the break I've been waiting for. Could I ask a question? What is it? What's the date on the will? August 15th this year. Why?

Well, it's just that Aunt Matilda changed her will very often. So you think your aunt may have left another one? One? She's probably left dozens. Oh, yeah? And where would these dozens of wills be? Who knows? She was always leaving things all over the house. Was there a place where your aunt did a lot of paperwork? Mostly at the desk in the corner, I guess. Well, let's start there. What do you know? An envelope, conveniently labeled...

Last Will and Testament. Dated September 29. I, Matilda Van Horn, leave all my possessions to my niece, Elizabeth Cole. Looks like you're clear, Jenkins. There goes your motive in my big case. I am relieved to hear it. May I be excused now? I must see to my duties. Fine, just don't get any ideas about sneaking out through the back. Or I'll be on you so fast. I shall remain within earshot. Now, Miss Cole, I think you admitted that you took the cocoa to your aunt's room. Are you expecting...

Suspecting me now? Then you don't deny you could have done it. I'd be stupid to say I couldn't have. It only takes a couple of seconds. Do you know that from personal experience? Sorry to disappoint you, but no. If he arrests you, can I have the case? Well, sure, but he won't. I mean, I had no reason to do it. I don't need the money. Everybody needs money. Besides, I had no idea I was in her will that month. Yeah, well, can you prove that?

I'll bet you've been here after September 29, right? Well, yes, but... And you knew exactly where to find that will, didn't you? Yes, but that doesn't mean... Ah, so it doesn't look good for you, does it? You seem awfully anxious to arrest someone, Chief Hanson. This is all based on the flimsiest of circumstantial evidence. That's right. It's not like you even have a personal stake in this. Oh, sure I do. This is the whole reason I became a police officer.

It's always been my dream to track down a fiendishly cunning killer like Sherlock Holmes and Hercule Poirot. They're not fiendishly cunning killers. No, no, I mean track one down like they did. So... When I heard Mrs. Van Horn had been murdered, it was like a dream come true. Well, I'm so happy for you. No, I don't mean it that way. Your aunt was a nice old lady, even if she was a little wacky.

We all knew her at the station. We'd help her across the street when it was our turn to work traffic. Yeah, we used to take bets on how far she'd get before she changed her mind and went the other direction. Once, I bet you'd get all the way across and won 75 bucks. How touching. Yeah. So, are you going to come quietly or do you want me to slap the cuffs on you? Ooh, please do. Excuse me.

Did you say that will was dated September? The 29th, yeah. Well, that's still almost three months ago. She's probably made two or three new wills since then. You think there's more, huh? You just said yourself that Mrs. Van Horn couldn't cross the street without changing your mind.

What makes you think she'd go three whole months without changing her will? Right. If I'd wanted to poison Aunt Matilda for her money, I'd have done it a couple months ago. Hmm. So if someone found a will made out in their favor, they'd know it would change in a few weeks. And that provides an excellent motive for murder right away. When we find out who is in the latest will, I have a feeling we'll find our criminal.

Hey, what the hell? Sounded like your butler. Jenkins, are you all right? Oh, I am tolerably well, Mom. I trust you are not unduly alarmed. Why are you holding the mistletoe from the chandelier? I was standing on a small stepladder and dusting the chandelier as is my custom when I suddenly felt myself losing my balance.

Jenkins, you haven't been getting into the bourbon again, have you? Only for medicinal purposes, ma'am. In an attempt to steady myself, I grabbed onto the nearest thing to hand, which proved to be this ball of mistletoe. Needless to say, it provided insufficient support. The thread by which it was suspended snapped, and I fell. Hence the noise. Now, I should return to my duties. Wait. There's something sticking out of the mistletoe there.

Let's see that. Ah, what a piece of paper. Just as I suspected. Last will and testament. I wouldn't bet on it. What's the date? October 19th. I, Matilda Van Horn, leave all my possessions to... What the hell? What? Let me see. Leave all my possessions to that nice policeman who helped me across the street this morning. That wouldn't have been you, would it? Oh, that was the day I won the 75 bucks. Oh, Chief Hanson, it doesn't look good for you.

You're not going to say you didn't know what was in the will, are you? Well, of course I didn't. Can you prove that? Hey, hey, I'm conducting the investigation here, not you. Didn't you say something like... When we found out who was in the latest will, we'd know who the criminal was? Yes, and I still think so. There's got to be another one. Anyway, that one's probably not even legal. Oh, I don't know.

It would certainly be strong evidence for Mrs. Van Horn's intent. Hey, cut that out. I'm telling you, there's got to be another will, and I intend to find it right away.

Frank Becomes a Prime Suspect

Ahem, I believe Master Percival wishes to enter. Well, show him in, Jenkins. Very good, Mom. Here, boy. Oh, ain't he cute? If you will excuse me. Okay, but remember, I'm still watching you. Yes, uh... What is it, little fella? You want to play fetch? What's he got in his mouth? Some kind of paper. Looks like he wants you to have it, Chief Hanson. Oh, looks like he does. Okay, fella, give it here. Aha!

Told you there was another will. Dated November 12th. Say, when did you two get married? This afternoon. Yeah, but what time this afternoon? I guess we left the courthouse around 330. As soon as we signed the certificate, we had to run four blocks to catch the 340 train. We made it, didn't we? Barely. Mrs. Van Horn didn't like you, did she, Mr. Simmons? I guess not. Is any of this important? Yes, it is. This will says you will inherit

Everything provided that at the time of your aunt's death, you are not married to Mr. Simmons. See, Frank, I told you she'd disinherit me. I'm starting to get the picture here. You were real smart, weren't you, Mrs. Simmons? What do you mean? Your aunt didn't like your boyfriend, and you knew you'd be out of her will if you married him. So you added a dose of poison to your aunt's cocoa, knowing she would drink it at 3 the next afternoon, and then married Mr. Simmons at 3.30.

You could then arrive innocently this evening. That's crazy! Ah, your plan almost went wrong. She didn't drink the cocoa until 325. You made it with just five minutes to spare. So... How did I get the poison in the cocoa? I was miles away until five this afternoon. Well... You could have caught the midnight train, got here about 1.30 this morning, let yourself in, poisoned the cocoa, and had plenty of time to catch the 657 back to town. Hey, whose side are you on?

Oh, why, you. I know who's behind us. Percival. I always knew he didn't like me. Monica, you're being hysterical. No, I'm not. Look at those beady little eyes. He was trying to frame me. Hey, let's be serious. Mrs. Simmons, do you have an alibi for last night? Wait. Yes, I do. Some friends threw me a bachelor party last night. I was there until past midnight. They'll swear to it. Yeah, well, they're your friends. Of course they'll swear to it.

But you're not the only one who benefits from this will. What were you doing yesterday, Mr. Simmons? Ah, it was Christmas shopping. Uh-huh. Running to anyone you know? No, I didn't think so. Monica, why are you looking at me like that? You made the appointment for the wedding. I wondered why you scheduled it so close to the train time. They were busy. I couldn't get in any earlier. And you were running these mysterious errands all day yesterday.

If you must know, I was buying your present. Ha, that's what you said. And you also said Aunt Matilda died just at the right time. All you could think about was getting this house. You don't think that. It all fits. You don't really believe this, do you? Best case I've heard so far. I'm not saying another word without a lawyer. Oh, hell, I am a lawyer.

I think it would be a good idea if you came back to the station with me, Mr. Simmons. Am I under arrest? I'll call it helping with the investigation. Excuse me, sir.

The True Killer Revealed

I was in the kitchen just now preparing to stuff the goose for tomorrow's dinner. Upon inserting a handful of stuffing into the cavity of the bird, I encountered this piece of paper which had already been stuffed inside. Another will? So it would appear... What's the date, and who's it made out to? It is dated December 1st of this year, and the sole beneficiary is the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals.

Maybe it was a conspiracy by the SPCA. Someone in the fundraising department got a little overzealous. All right, Mr. Simmons. You're off the hook. For now. See, Monica? We're cleared. No, we're not. Nobody's cleared until we find the last will. I still like my idea. Look, why don't we concentrate on realistic possibilities? Like the possibility there might still be another will? I don't know. There's been about one a month so far, and this one's about a month old. Well...

Let's make sure. I can't stand this. Not knowing if someone's going to be arrested in the next minute. Maybe me. I want to know who did it now. Tonight! Oh, come on, Mrs. Simmons. A thorough search could take days. I was kind of counting on getting this case wrapped up quick and getting home to fill Janie's stocking. And I was kind of counting on not spending Christmas in jail. Monica, you're getting hysterical again.

Monica, darling, I'm sorry. I didn't mean what I said before. I don't want the house, really. All these beautiful things just went to my head, that's all. Oh, I'm sorry, I suspe- There, there. It's okay. Ah, heck. I guess we can take a look around and see if anything else turns up. Ms. Cole, you've been looking at that Christmas tree for a long time. You see anything over there?

Well, there is something kind of strange. There's a package here with a tag that says, to whom it may concern. I think we ought to find out what's inside. Just a minute, I'll open it. Oh, typical. She forgot the present. Oh, wait, wait. There's a piece of paper at the bottom. Let's see. Oh, surprise, surprise. Last will and testament.

dated December 20. This is it, folks. This document will give us the name of a fiendishly cunning killer, the murderer of Matilda Van Horn. When I read this, we'll all know. Will? I can't believe it. What? No, it doesn't make sense. What? This will leaves everything to my faithful dog, Percival. What? Help me, that's what it says.

I've heard of the least likely suspect, but this is ridiculous. Pardon me, but Master Percival is attempting to escape into the hallway. Shut the door, quick! Get up! Trap him in the corner! Frank, look out! Where'd he go? I've got him trapped behind the couch. Help me grab him. Here, boy. Damn it, he got away. Where'd he go? Behind the Christmas tree. Right. Oh, there goes the tree. The little monster bit me. Cut him off. I've got him. No, I don't. I believe Master Percival. Don't tell us.

Very good, Maldon. Good work, Mr. Jenkins. Hold him so he can't bite you. Now, Percival, you have the right to remain silent. If you give up the right to remain silent, anything you... BARC can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney and to have the attorney present during questioning. If you cannot afford an attorney or otherwise provide one, one will be provided for you at no cost to yourself.

Do you understand these rights as I have read them to you? Bark once for yes, twice for no. Now, we'll just slip on these... Oh, damn, the cuffs are too big for his paws. Put him in his kennel, Jenkins. Very good, Mom. Do you want to defend this one, Frank? It could be your big break. I'd rather prosecute the little bastard. Are you okay? I think I broke my knee and I've probably got rabies, but otherwise I'm just fine.

Poor Frankie, I'll make it up to you. Master Percival is prepared for departure. Good. We'll take him down to the station and get one of the police dogs to take a statement. I also discovered this. secreted beneath the rug in his kennel. Oh, a packet marked keep out of reach of children. Huh? Well, that clenches it. I'm only to bet the lab will find out this is the stuff in Mrs. Van Horn's cocoa.

So it was Percival all the time. How on earth did he do it? He had the best protection of all. No one ever suspected him. He must have hidden this packet in your aunt's room ahead of time. You said he was on the bed when you brought the cocoa in. All he had to do was wait until your aunt turned away for a moment, rip the packet open with his teeth, and pour it into the cocoa. Even if your aunt saw him sniffing around the cup,

She'd only think he was trying to drink some. When did you first suspect him? When he walked in with that will in his teeth. I thought it was a little too convenient. He was trying to frame me. That's right, but I couldn't be sure until we found the will naming him as the sole Beneficiary and Matilda always said he was intelligent not just intelligent fiendishly cunning

A Surprising Twist and Resolution

I'll bet even Sherlock Holmes and Hercule Poirot never solved a case like this. I think you're right. Too bad about the money, though. Looks like the SPCA will get it after all. Frank. I have a little money that I inherited from my parents. If you really want to, we could try to buy back the house. It would take a long time, but maybe we could make a down payment. No. Forget it, Monica. This house has done nothing but make us fight. I'd rather have you than it any day.

Oh, Frank. Well, I'd better be going. Looks like I may get home in time to fill up Janie's stocking after all. Hey, thanks for your help, Chief Hanson. Don't mention it. I'll let myself out. Merry Christmas, everybody. Merry Christmas. Well, I know how we're going to spend tonight.

This room looks like it's been hit by a tornado. I will see to it, Mom. Oh, no, Jenkins. At least let us help you. Come on. Let's get this tree set up again. Yeah, Libby and I will pick up the ornaments. Here's the top half of the angel. You see the bottom? Yeah, over here. Give it to me. I'll put it back together. There. Wait, there should be a piece of paper to stiffen the skirt. Here it is. Hey, there's something written on it. Three guesses what it is. It's another well, all right. Date it.

today. Should I read it? Go ahead. Okay. It says, I, Matilda Van Horn, leave all my possessions to my niece, Monica Van Horn, provided. That at the time of my death, she has had the sense to marry that nice young man, Frank Simmons. So, she did change your mind about you, Frank. I'm so glad. Too bad about the money, though. You missed it by five minutes. Ahem.

If I might make an observation, we have been calculating the time of your aunt's demise based upon the time at which her bedside clocks stop. So? Well, Mom, it has just occurred to me that her bedside clock has been ten minutes slow for approximately five years. So, Aunt Matilda actually didn't die until 3.35. Which was after we were married.

Which means you inherit everything. Precisely. Oh, I think I'm going to cry again. Frank, it looks like we're going to get the house after all. Do you mind? I think I could get used to it. Look, this has been such a crazy day. Why don't we have some supper now? Finish cleaning up later. Good idea. Jenkins, could you serve supper now? Very well, Mom. Oh, and Jenkins...

You will stay and work for Frank and me when we move in. I wouldn't dream of leaving, Mom. This is quite the most exciting position I have ever held. I propose we drink a toast to Aunt Matilda with supper. This is the best Christmas present anyone could get. It's just a shame she had to die to give it to us. Well, come on, let's get cleaned up for dinner. Wait, I want to do one more thing first. What? I'm going to put that mistletoe up again.

Any reason why? I have a feeling we'll be using it a lot in the next few days. Well, don't wear it out. Save some for me and Janky Wanky. Libby! Oh, you don't think I meant that, did you? Oh, hi, Jenkins. We were just talking about you. Indeed, sir. Dinner is served. I've just thought of something. What is Chief Hansen going to do when he finds out there's another will? Don't worry.

This time, we can prove we didn't know about it. We've both been keeping an eye on each other all day. I think Chief Anson's got a good case on Percival. It still seems unbelievable. How could he do it? Might one say, where there's a will, there's a way.

Episode Credits and Conclusion

Well, I wasn't going to. It is sometimes a butler's duty to say distasteful things, Mom. Murder and Mistletoe stars Sherry Berger as Monica, Dennis Newport as Frank. Also starring Kate Levan as Libby, Michael Hagedorn as Jenkins, Harvey Lowe as Chief Hanson, and Carol Seymour as the fiendish Percival the Pekingese. Sound effects by Pam Frederick. Directed by Carol Seymour. and I'm Marshall Rubin. We hope you enjoyed our program this afternoon. Thank you for watching and listening.

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