Classic Sonic Society #28: Western Shenanigans

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Showcase Sundays today on the Mutual Audio Network. From 88.1 FM in Halifax to the farmlands in the Muscadabit Valley. You're listening with me, Jack Ward, to Classic Sonic Society. The following audio drama is rated PG for parental guidance recommended. From the four corners of this world, there are more than 341 million people who speak English. This is the society of the ear, the society of the mind.

Our voices are legion. Here we have the opportunity to spread stories through the theater of the mind, all across the cyber byways and radial beacons. We are inclusive. We are eclectic. We are collective. We are the Sonic Society. Welcome to another meeting of the Sonic Society. I'm your host, Jack Ward. Each week we delve into the suspenseful and the sublime, the action-packed and the erudite.

We look into masterpieces of audio cinema and some of the mayhem behind the sonic scenery. Membership is inclusive. You already have the best seat in the house. Have you noticed that recently westerns are making a bit of a comeback? I'm not speaking directly about the most recent Oscar buzz of Brokeback Mountain, but rather the successes of shows like Colonial Radio Theater's Powder River, which is getting rave reviews and thunderous applause from all quarters.

XM Satellite Radio can't seem to get enough of Powder River, and Jerry Robbins is now working on Season 3 of the hit series.

on television even science fiction takes a turn moseying along with the wagon trains of the stars jean roddenberry claimed to sell star trek in the sixties with that phrase and joss whedon's pre-empted triumph firefly along with his follow-up movie serenity leans heavily on that age of old west while i'm well aware that genres weave in and out of popularity i'm more interested in why cycles occur rather than suggesting that they somehow have a regular pattern

if they did wouldn't it have been time for a big thirties pulp movie like sky captain and the world of tomorrow i think there's something about the world we live in today and the values that the old west represented simplicity even a clearer sense of what's right and what's wrong in today's complex society there's a real yearning for a tangible way to make a better life later we'll finish our interview with schlock audio's bruce humphreys

But without further ado, pull your rocker out to the porch, listen to the coyotes howl to the moon, and the cattle settle in the stables as we present Texas Radio Theater's Bride Comes to Yellow Sky, here on the Sonic Society. We now present a story from the American journalist, poet, novelist, and short story writer Stephen Crane. Crane was born on November 1, 1871 in Newark, New Jersey, the youngest son of 14 children.

He demonstrated an early interest in literature and published his first sketch at the age of 19 in a school magazine. He attended a series of colleges. but was never more than an indifferent student and finally quit for good in 1891 to work as a journalist. In 1893, Crane began writing the Red Badge of Courage, the story of the American Civil War.

The book was published two years later and became a bestseller, bringing its author international fame. In 1895, Crane toured the American West and Mexico as a special correspondent for the Bachelor-Johnson syndicate. He gathered material for several of his finest stories, including the Blue Hotel, and the story we're about to hear, The Bride Comes to Yellow Sky. Stephen Crane died of tuberculosis on June 5, 1900. He was only 28 years old.

But now let's get on with our story. That whistle belongs to the train making its way across the great state of Texas in the last years of the 19th century. And on that train, but wait. Our story really starts six months earlier in Luke Grevy's emporium in a town of yellow sky and with a man named Scratchy Wilson. That's how wake old Jack would have did it.

Just pull that six-gun out and let fly. Just point the gun. Don't take no time to aim. Now, the Laramie kid, why, he was a whole different story. Trachy, don't you think it's about time for you to head on home? What? Well, it's getting late, and I was hoping to close up. Ain't you interested in this, Greavy? Well, Scratchy, I ain't too interested. Don't you want to learn nothing? Scratchy, since you come in here, you shot every bottle of liniment on the shelf, plus two sacks of flour.

three kerosene lamps. I got a barrel of salt pork and ain't never going to be the same again neither. And you're on your second jug of whiskey and you add up every juju bean in the place. I can't afford to learn no more. Can't you go and educate someone else for a while? Well, Grevy, if I didn't know better, I'd think you was trying to insult me. You ain't trying to do that, are you, Grevy? Well, I know, Scratchy. Of course not. I was only just... Because if I thought you was insulting me...

It'd get me awful riled. I might forget what good friends we was. You wouldn't want me to do that, would you? No, no, Scratch, I sure wouldn't want that. That's what I thought. I'm talking about my life here. Me and Waco Jack rode together. Nobody else in this town can say that. Nobody else can tell you what I'm telling. Understand? Yes, Sir Scratch, I do. I understand. Now, good.

Give me another jug of that sippin' whiskey. This one's empty. Oh, Scratchy, now I ain't got but one left. Well, hand it over. What kind of store is this, anyhow? Here. That's better. Now where was I? Oh yeah, Laramie kid. Well, the kid, he always said you gotta take aim. Gotta pick your target and take that extra second to aim true. Here, I'll show you.

Uh, how about that can up there with the pink label? No, Scratchy, no. I had to order them peaches special for the mayor. The mayor, huh? That's for the mayor. Scratchy Wilson, what's that? Scratchy Wilson, come on out here. Somebody out in the street. It's Marshall Potter. Potter, huh? Wonder what he wants. He wants you. Wilson? Well, I best see what he's after. Thunderation! I dropped my jug!

Dang that, Potter. What do you want? I come to arrest you, Scratchy, for drunken disorderly. I come to bring you to jail. And supposing I ain't in the mood to go to jail, Mr. Marshal Jack Potter? Then I'll have to take you, Scratchy. Come on in and get me. Oh, no, now, Scratchy, please. I think you've busted up enough of Luke Griebe's stock for one day, Scratchy. Step out here in the street and we'll settle this. Settle it, huh?

Well, that's just what I aim to do. Open that door, gravy. All right, Potter, I'm stepping outside. You've been authority my side for a lot of years, so now let's settle it, just like you say. Now, Scratchy, you stopped acting a fool and come away peaceable. Take those six guns out of their holsters and drop them in the street. Oh, my lord, they're gonna have it out. Drop my six guns? Drop my six guns? Well, I'll drop...

Sure enough, you low-down polecat. Don't go for your gun, Scratchy. I don't want nobody to get hurt. Well, you should have thought about that bit before, Mr. Marshall Jack Potter. Let me show you the way old Waco Jack would have done it. Scratchy, I'm warning you. Oh, my Lord.

I'll get you for this, you mangy dog. I won't forget this, you son of a... And now let's get back to that train. It's six months later, and on the train making its way across Texas are a man and wife. Newlyweds who can't begin to imagine the strange wedding reception that awaits them in the town of Yellow Sky. You comfortable, honey? Yes, thank you, dear.

Ever been in a parlor car before? No, I never was. It's fine, ain't it? Great. After a while, we can go forward to the diner and get a big layout. Finest meal in the world. Costs a dollar. A dollar? Oh, Jack, darling, isn't that too much? Not for us. Not this trip, anyhow. We're going to do the whole thing. You know, it's a thousand miles from one end of Texas to the other, and this train runs across it.

and never stops but four times. And one of those times is yellow sky. Oh, yellow sky. Of course, it's only to take on water, but still, it stops there. I can't wait to see it. I got a place of my own there, right in town. It's just adobe, like all the other houses on the street, but I figure me and you can fix it up some, and it'll be right livable. I expect all it needs is a woman's touch. That's right. A woman's touch. Oh, conductor. Yes, ma'am. What time do we get to Yellow Sky? Yellow Sky?

That'd be 3.42, ma'am. About an hour from now. Thank you. My husband is Marshal of Yellow Sky. Is that right? Yes. He's quite a fine-looking man, isn't he? No, Lily. Yes, ma'am. I reckon he is. We're coming from San Antonio, you know. Yes, ma'am. I saw you two get on. We were married there. Yesterday. Yes, ma'am, I know. You know? How could you know? It shows, ma'am. It shows.

Real good, Buster. Very nice. Very nice. It was lovely, Buster. Buster, I always said, you've got the fastest hands in Yellow Sky next to Jack Potter. B-b-b-b-bikes. Say, Nancy, why don't you sing us a song? Oh, no. Oh, come on, miss. I'd like to hear you. Go ahead, Nancy. Sing that one you were singing in the back before. Oh, all right. Do you know that one, Buster? You b-b-b-bed.

That was fine, Nancy. Beautiful. Oh, thanks for playing, Buster. That's okay, Nancy. That really was, sweet miss. I wonder if you'd have a drink with me. Let me go freshen up. I'll be right back. She's a fine girl. You like another beer, friend? Don't mind if I do. Sure is hot. Hot? Why, this here's a cold snap. You need to come back around July or so. Why, so hot then when the chickens lay eggs, they come out hard-boiled. Yeah, I since I've seen stumps and old little logs.

Crawling to get in the shade. Folks, talk about that Desperado Waco Jack. He died and got himself sent to hell. And him being a Texas man, it was so much cooler there than what he was used to. He went out and sent back for his blankets. I guess it's true what old General Sheridan said. If I own Texas... and I owned hell, I had to rent out Texas and live in hell. Folks around these parts never did care for that General Sheridan much.

Oh. Oh, I guess it's all right. I reckon he don't cotton dust, neither. Listen, stranger, what brings you to Yellow Sky? Civilization, my friend. My mission is to bring civilization to the Wild West. I'm in ladies' underwear. You're what? I mean, I sell ladies' underwear. I'm a traveling salesman. Well, how's business? Tolerable, friend. Tolerable. I just took an order down at the Emporium for our most popular corset. Here, I'll show you. I've got one in my sample case.

What do you think of that? Oh, boy. My, so that's civilization, eh? Yes, sir. Well, it don't look half bad. Mac, there's something wrong with that pump. Oh. Sorry, miss. Oh, my! I was just showing your friend here the, uh... Oh, yes, I can see what you were showing. Oh, why don't you boys grow up? You ought to be ashamed. Excuse me, I just remembered an...

Oh, come on, Nancy. Now, we didn't mean no harm. I'm sorry, miss. Please come back. I'll put it away. Oh, come on now. Now, watch out for the swinging doors. I guess I should oil them doors one of these days. Well, I didn't expect that. Kind of funny reaction, girl like that. You got a lot to learn about the West, my friend. Things aren't always what they seem like. There's lots of things changing out here. We might just be a bit more civilized than you.

think. Well, I won't argue with you. I just hope that she's going to be all right. Oh, she'll be fine. She'll calm down. I expect she'll be back after a spell. Mac! See there? What'd I tell you? I bet that's her now. Mac! Mac! Scratchy Wilson's in town. Drunk! as a skunk and loaded for bear. Scratchy Wilson, thunderation. You better get in here, Nancy. Oh, no, no. I got to go warn everybody. I'll be all right. Scratchy Wilson, I got to go. So long.

Who's Scratchy Wilson? He's the last one of the old gang that used to hang out along the river here. He ain't a bad fella, really, but when he gets liquored up, he's mean as a snake. Mighty handy with a six-gun, too. Well, what does this mean? Is there going to be a gunfight? I don't know if there'll be a fight or not, but there'll be some shooting, sure enough.

Is that him? Let me take a peek out the door. Yeah, that's him. He's on the warpath, got both his six guns. He's down at the end of the street by Hanson's livery. Looks like he's headed this way, all right. He shot the dog? No, he just scared him. Scratchy kind of likes dogs. Does this happen a lot? Once a month or so whenever he can scrape up enough for a bottle.

The guy just shot out one of the windows of the barbershop. There goes the rest of them. What's he doing now? He's reloading. What are we going to do? Ain't nothing to do. Looks like old Scratchy's got the high card right now. Will he kill anybody? He never has yet, but I suppose there's always a first time. I don't know about you, but I ain't someone to do no experimenting.

Uh-oh, he's moving down towards the jail. More civilized than I think, huh? I'll take my kind of civilization over yours any day. I can't believe there's nothing we can do. How did you handle this before? Usually Jack Potter steps in. Who's he? He's a town marshal. Cracker Jack won, too. While I seen him take them Temple brothers, all three of them single-handed, took them down, too, and put them in jail without even getting killed. Anyway.

Jack usually goes out and fights scratchy when he comes on one of these tears. Nice job he's got. So we just have to wait for this marshal to show up? I reckon so, except he ain't here. mean he's not here he took the train to san anton two days ago yellow sky next next stop yellow sky we're almost there darling yes we are what's the matter

Nothing. Nothing. Yes, there is. Come on now. You're not going to start out keeping secrets from your wife, are you? No. No, it's nothing like that. Then what? Well, it's foolish, really. You see... The folks back in Yellow Sky, they didn't know I was going to get married. Well, I don't think you knew it yourself. Oh, I was working up to it. Ever since I saw you the first time working in that cafe, I used to wonder about it.

You were the finest thing I ever saw. You still are. Oh, darling. I used to wonder if you'd have me, wonder what it'd be like, and finally I got sick of wondering, and I had to know. I had to go on back to San Antonio and ask you. Ask you to name the day. I was plum happy when you said yes, and plum surprised when you said... Why not today? Yeah. That kind of threw me for a minute, but then I thought, well, why in thunder not today?

And are you having second thoughts? You know I'm not. I'm just kind of anxious about the folks in town, how they're going to take it, me being married, I mean. I thought you were going to send a telegram. I thought about it. i was gonna do it then i got to thinking well They have this brass band. A brass band? Well, that's what they call it, but it ain't a real brass band. Walt Shiner's got this old cavalry bugle, and Jeter Watson plays the mouth organ.

Jake Daltrey, he fixed up an old snare drum he found someplace. They like to put on a show, you know, Fourth of July and such. Any excuse, really. Well... Yes? Well, I didn't want to... Putting on a show on us. On us. All right, on me. I could just picture him meeting the train and making a big fuss. I would have felt all funny about it. I love you, Jack Potter. You're the man who faced down all three of the...

Which brothers was it? The Temple Brothers. Yes, the Temple Brothers, all armed to the teeth. And you can't face a bugle, a mouth organ, and an old snare drum. You are wonderful. Oh, Lily, don't make fun of me. You can see my problem, can't you? It's like I left two days ago, and now I'm coming back a different person. Yes, now you're an old married man. Oh, no. Well, it's just different. That's all.

They all think of me as just the marshal, and now, well, they're going to have to think of me in a different way. I just don't know what's going to happen. I expect it might be a little bit awkward at first, but things will turn out all right. Yes, you're right. I expect I'll just have to explain to them how things are. You mean a showdown. Yeah, I guess we'll have to have a showdown.

He's calling Potter out. Last time the two of them tangled Jack had to shoot him in the leg. Looks like Scratchy wants to even the score and he don't even know Jack's not there. What's he going to do when he finds out? I reckon we'll know soon enough. What's he doing now? He's giving up down there. He's heading this way. Oh, my stars and garters. We'd best get away from the door. Where's Potter? Howdy, howdy, scratchy. I'm looking for a mangy polecat named Jack Potter.

Where's he at? He ain't here, Scratchy. I didn't ask you where he ain't. Where in thunder is he? Well, Scratchy, I'm not sure. Wait a minute. Who's the dude? Who, me? I'm in ladies underwear. I mean, I mean, I'm nobody. I'm nobody. What you looking at me like that for? Looking? I wasn't looking. Yes, you was too. Oh, looking. Yes, yes, I was looking. I'm sorry. I don't want any trouble. Trouble?

why you don't know what trouble is i'm made out of trouble i'm trouble through and through if you was to break off just a little piece of me that'd be more trouble than you'd ever seen You see this sick shooter, dude? Yes, sir. Well, don't you cross my path or I'll plug you just for practice. Yes, sir. I mean, no, sir. I mean, yes, sir. Oh, leave him alone, Scratchy. He don't mean no harm. You know what?

I'm gonna do when I find Jack Potter. Him and me's gonna have it out once and for all. Just him and me. Give me a drink! Don't you think you've had enough to drink? I said give me a drink! Okay, okay, okay, okay. Give me another. Yep, just him and me. You know what that dirty sidewinder done? No. Another. Shot me in the leg. This one here pains me every time it rains. Does it rain often? No, it don't hardly rain at all, you dumb dude. That ain't the point.

The point is, Jack Potter shot me in the leg. Well, now, Scratchy, you did throw down on him. What's that got to do with it? Whose side are you on, anyways? I was only saying, that's all. Yeah, well, what business is it of yearn? It weren't your leg got shot. Drug me in front of Judge Wallace, too. Had to pay me a fine. It ain't right. Man comes into town for a little harmless recreation. That's all it was. Just a little harmless fun.

What happens? Why that bushwhacking sidewinder shoots me in the leg, that's what. He didn't have no call to do it. Anybody goes throwing lead around like that is a low-down mangy coyote. Ain't that right, dude? Yeah, of course he is. And that's what Jack Potter is. That reminds me.

You never did answer my question. Where's the dirty dog hiding now? I told you he ain't here, Scratchy. Well, where's he at? Well, he ain't even in town at all. He took the train to San Antonio two days ago. Took the train? Well, he can't get away from me that easy. You know what I'll do. I think I'll just... What was that? I didn't hear nothing.

I suppose you didn't hear that neither. No, sir. What? I mean, yes, sir. I mean, no, sir. I mean, get out of my way. Could be that's Jack Potter coming back. I reckon I'll just go meet me a train. Yellow sky, yellow sky. Fifteen minutes to take on water. Goodbye now, ma'am. Goodbye, sir. Goodbye. The best of luck to both of you. Well, thank you. Thanks. Mind your step there. Come on, dear. I'll help you down. Thank you, darling.

I've got the valise. They'll send the trunk along. Shall we go? So, this is Yellow Sky. This is it. I like it. I'm glad. Right around this corner now. There's Kruger's Feed and Seed and the Byram Hotel. Over yonder's the church. Methodist, I think. Oh? Well, I ain't been exactly what you'd call a regular visitor. have to do something about that. Oh. And over there's the Emporium and Hanson's Livery and the Barbershop and that's funny. What? All the windows are broken. What does that mean?

I don't know. There's no one on the street. Lily, you need to get out of the... Potter? Jack Potter? Thought you could sneak up on me, eh? No, don't you move a finger toward your gun. I got the drop on you. Don't you move an eyelash. I ain't got a gun on me, Scratchy. Don't you tell me you ain't got no gun. Don't you tell me no lie like that. There ain't a man in Texas ever seen you without no gun.

Don't you take me for no kid. I ain't taking you for a kid, Scratchy. I'm taking you for a damn fool. I said I ain't got a gun and I ain't. See for yourself. I'll spread my coat. Well, I'll be. How come you ain't got no gun? I've just come from San Antone with my wife. That's why. I'm married. If I'd known some crazy galoot like you was prowling around here, I'd had a gun. And don't you forget it. Married? You?

Well, that ain't so. Yes, it is. This is my wife right here. Lily, I'd like you to meet Scratchy Wilson. Scratchy, this is my wife, Lillian. Pleased to meet you, Mr. Wilson. Huh? Oh, yeah. How do, ma'am? Are you a friend of my husband's, Mr. Wilson? I'm a what? Well, I... Yeah, I reckon I am. Well, I hope we can be friends as well. Yes, ma'am.

Why don't you put that six gun away, Scratchy? Well, I suppose it's all off now. If you say so, Scratchy. Oh, yeah, I reckon so. Well, we've got to get along home. So long, Scratchy. Goodbye, Mr. Wilson. Yeah, I'll see you around. Married. Well, if that don't beat all. Well, I'm a lop-eared mule. I'd have never believed it. Jack Potter married. It don't seem right somehow. Dang, what's the world coming to? Wonder what I'm gonna do now. Guess I'll have to get a job.

This presentation of the Texas Radio Theater Company has been produced by Shannon Froelich in cooperation with the Arlington Museum of Art, challenging its visitors to think creatively. For more information on us and our radio plays, please log on to TexasRadioTheatre.com. The Bride Comes to Yellow Sky was adapted by Jim Court from a Stephen Crane short story. Tonight's productions were directed and engineered by Richard Frohlich.

The Bride Comes to Yellow Sky was recorded in front of a studio audience on February 23rd, 2003. Live sound effects were created by Libby Millire. Featured in the cast were Earl Browning as Marshall Potter. Taffy Geisel as Nancy. Gary Layton as Scratchy Wilson. Ivy Price as Mr. Grevy and Mac. Spencer Prokop as Drummer. Susie Zimmerman as Lily. And Ken Rainey as the train conductor and buster.

This recording is copyrighted by Jim Court and Richard Froelich, 2003. This is a production of the Texas Radio Theater Company in Arlington, Texas. Thanks for listening.

You've just listened to Bride Comes to Yellow Sky on the Sonic Society, and I'm Jack Ward. We return in a moment. This is the story of Wally the Wizard. That's me. A young man on a quest for fame and fortune in an unfortunate world. Oh, who is it that does? Knock on the door of the god of Dreska? It is I, Wally the Wizard. Come on a quest for knowledge and power. Who? Who dares approach the road of the great queen of Anganel?

It appears to be a wizard, madam. I can see that, you fool! What is your business in these lands, stranger? I seek the greatness. The greatness? Can you direct me to a place of knowledge where one can seek one's fortune, fame, women, and an easy diploma in the arts of wizardry? Are you joking? You sure you haven't come to the wrong place? Somehow I think you kind people will genuinely want to hear more of my adventures.

Join us soon here in the society for the full adventure of Wally the Wizard from Selina's Dreams, presented by Dream Realm Enterprises. For more info, join us on the web at dregold.net.

We now return to the Sonic Society in part two of our interview with Bruce Humphreys of Schlock Audio Theatre. Now tell me, what do you find most compelling about audio drama? Because it sounds like you've got the ability to be able to do straight stage plays and such. What do you find about audio drama to be the most interesting that you love to do?

to go to Mars. If you want to go inside somebody's body and play around in their heart, physically, you'd have to do some type of stage or even on television, some blue screen. or in movies, something high-tech. An audio drama, you could say. And that's all you have to say. That's right. Starting to sound a bit like the Bill Cosby Chickenheart old radio drama. Yeah. But, you know, that's the thing. No, that's right. I guess I'm going to also...

But that's all you have to say with audio drama. A lot of people try to overproduce it, and when I first started, I was doing the same thing. I have to make it like a movie, you know? You know, of course, that's another argument, but let's get it like a movie, you know? Make it sound like you're on TV.

No, you don't have to do that. You just have to grasp their ear and take them with you. And a lot of times if people are listening, and that's hard to do in our visual world these days, but if you're listening... You know, and you do it right. You've got them by the hand. And that's why I like it better, because you can do anything you want to in your basement, you know, within reason and the content of the wall. You can do anything you want to.

What do you think is the most important thing? Because one of our mandates here at Sonic Society is to help people do radio drama. So when you think back in giving Charles some advice and other people who are doing this... What kind of advice could you give our listeners right now? Oh, to write their own? I mean, you know, really it's two different animals. Okay, let's talk about writing first. Sure. What I have learned in writing audio theater, and I still have, I'm in it.

You know, number one, you know, with anything, I had an old teacher a long time ago tell me about writing screenplays. You know, it doesn't care if you know all the angle here or close in or close up mic. You know, all the stage directions and stuff for audio drama have a good story. You know, that's the first thing for any writing. You know, have a great story. But for writing an audio drama...

Have a good story and write with your ear. Actually, not on the typewriter. It makes it nice to get two keys at once. But really, it's write with your ear. Charles does it. I even catch this. And when I review some other people's work, you know, when they write, I go, that's a visualization, you know. Like a character, a, you know, Charlie.

and wipes down his fender. You know? Don't have that. Something like that. That's a visualization. You're writing for television, and when you're writing for radio drama, it's, you know, sound. Charlie gets out of the truck. You know, oh, there's a smudge right there on my fender. I've got to get that out, you know. Got a little rough spot there, too. Need to work this up, do some body work. You know, things like that. You have to tell, really tell the audience.

What's going on? I would suggest, in creating audio drama, the same thing. You know, you have to do it all with the ear, because that's really what it's all around. It really is. I heard a wonderful piece from Darker Projects, darkerprojects.com. And it was a man leaving a phone message to her friend saying that they're out to get me, and it's called They. And it's a whole 20-minute piece of this man, and it's almost like a telltale heart.

He slides into insanity, and it grips you because it's just him and you and him talking. There's no sound effects. You know, there's no music behind it. It's just him, and you're listening to him. And so think of that. It's a wonderful piece. Go to that group. It's a wonderful piece. But that's all it is. Does that answer your question? Absolutely. No, that's great. Thank you. You bring up another point, though. I was going to ask you.

There's so much audio cinema out there now, audio theater. Who do you like to listen to nowadays? Darker Projects, you just mentioned. Who else do you like to listen to? Yeah, actually, thanks to Charles, who is... Did you know, I think they're going to name him the second Smithsonian, Charles Pratt and Carson Candace, because he collects everything. It's just amazing. He's Packrat Supreme, but it's good stuff. And he's been downloading and collecting tons.

And new audio drama stuff. And he burns them to CD or sends them to me in MP3s because for some reason I just, I've heard a lot of it, but I'm keeping it now too. So I've been listening to a lot of old stuff. He has a complete set. The whole complete set of Superman, the audio drama from the 40s. There's a radio theater there. It's amazing, a lot of the stuff.

You know interesting them you know all the all the good ones intersect among one of my favorite is like quiet please these are old series quiet please and Of course everyone likes the shadow and fish like that, but new interesting. There's a lot of fan fiction. I've heard about this with the vampire lady. Anne Rice? Right. Okay.

you know, write for characters and write their own thing. It's called fan fiction. You know, they're pastiches of these characters. Sure. But there's a lot of with Batman and Robin I've been, you know, seeing these sides. And they do audio drama. Yep. In fact, I heard one today. It was with Star Trek. Oh, really? And it was amazing. The production value was fantastic. It was just great. It was called On One's Memories.

I didn't write it down. I just wanted to tell you about it. Production was great, you know. You could tell. And stuff like that. But this is fan fiction. And you know, people do it this way because they love it. They're not going to be able to sell it. Or they're not going to be able to. marketed me other way than just on the internet, which I think is our savior with radio theater and audio drama. But that's what I do. What else do I like to listen to?

My favorite is ZBS, you know, the Ruby series, Jack Flanders, because if you really want to hear how radio theater or audio drama is being done, the best way to do it, listen to them. to ZBS. Just go to ZBS.org and listen to the Ruby series and stuff. Talk about economy, humor, and it doesn't always have to be funny, but you have some...

wonderful moments. There was a great line that they did. I was talking to the dog. I can't remember the dog's character name, you know, he's roughing around like that, and he's on the planet of invisibility or something. And he says, The guy says to the dog, says, imagine this. Imagine. They know how to take their time. Right. And not rush it. And there was this wonderful long pause. And I was listening to it while working in a busy little convenience store. Busy. And this is on the background.

And there was a couple of customers and I, and it was loud enough, and we all were kind of looking off because we were all imagining a carnival. All we have to do is be told to do it. You know, we want to imagine so much that... using it that way. But really, that is some of what I like listening to now. I mean, I will listen to everything. You know, here in Columbia, that's where the Midwest

It's now National Audio Theater Festivals here in America, in the United States, but it was started here in Columbia, where I live. It was the Midwest Radio. I think I'm going to have to come down and come to one of these big conferences. Well, yeah, you'll have to come. Now, that's being the NETS. Jack is in West Plains, and hopefully...

They moved down there because the radio station down there was working with them. But it used to be here in Columbia. I would like to go to it. I've been to the productions. I never went to the workshop. Family always takes vacation during that time of year, so we can never get there. But I've been to the productions and they're fun. They're fun. They're long. You know, I mean, they're two hours, two and a half hours long with credits. So...

You know, but when you listen to them on the CDs, I hear some of them. I have a little radio show, too, and I hear some of Sue's media works. And they're good. They're fun when you listen to them. I'm Jack Ward. We return in a moment.

Can you believe at the time I'm recording this, you have completed 25 weeks of bringing audiophiles like myself, new and innovative radio drama to the airwaves and podcasting world? And it certainly has been a success. There are hundreds of subscribers to the Sonic Society podcast. And who knows how many are tuning in each week with all the radio stations now syndicating the show.

We all want the very best radio drama has to offer, and you have certainly delivered nothing less. So thanks, guys, for keeping old traditions alive with new radio drama. I know it makes this audio addict very happy. You can find all the information you need about Sonic Society, the many other audio cinema productions out there, and just about anything on the audio landscape at the Audio Addicts blog.

Embrace your addiction at societyfans.blogspot.com. Keep up the great work, guys. And remember, you two are always welcome into the theater of my mind.

My name is Jack Ward and we're in the Sonic Society. Wasted tape. You know you don't have to act with me, Steve. You don't have to say anything. You don't have to do anything. Not a thing. Oh, maybe just whistle. You know how to whistle, don't you, Steve? You just put your lips together and blow. Not quite like that. Come on, purse those gumshoe lips of yours a bit more and try it again. No! No, no, no, here!

Just... Oh, for God's sake, turn the music off! Okay, look, here. Put your... All right, now. Why are you holding my lips? Shut up! Okay, now, blow. It hurts. Less talking, more blowing, come on. No, no, no. It's not that difficult. This is not rocket science! Come on, blow! This is going to be a long movie. Wasted tape. Meet Darren. Hi. Darren has been walking to Unka Sobs for months now. Yep.

He's been going every day for his lunch, getting one of our fresh, legendary sandwiches. Yep. Little does Darren know, we've secretly been replacing his healthy, calorie-reduced mayonnaise for weeks with a smooth, creamy lard. What? Because Darren is so gullible and stupid...

He's been gobbling those sandwiches down on a regular basis, never realizing that the cause of his rolls of fat could have anything to do with this yummy, delicious lard-filled sandwich. Hey! In fact, Darren has been lying to you. He said he was walking to Uncle Subs every day, but in fact he only walks around the corner where he catches a cat. So hooray for Darren. He's our kind of customer. Deceitful, chonked full of fat, and totally gullible. Three cheers for Darren.

Hooray! Hooray! Hooray! Uh, thanks? Shut up, you fat tub of lard. Onca Subs is a division of Hens Oil Assorted Fat Products, putting the dye in diet. Wasted. Tape. Yes? Good afternoon, ma'am. Have you ever wondered if there's one true religion? Uh, no. Well then, do you have a moment to discuss your spiritual path and the grander scheme of things? Are you a Jehovah's Witness? Jehovah's Witness? No, ma'am, definitely not. Well, what do you want to talk about then?

Cthulhu. Cthu-who? Cthulhu, the great devourer, undead elder god of the cosmos, the shaper of dark dreams, the many tentacled monster whose origins are lost in an ancient era before space and time even existed. Wow, this Cthulhu guy really gets around. Oh, Cthulhu isn't a guy, ma'am. He's an enormous sea creature whose true shape is so terrifying that those who look upon him for even a moment go hopelessly insane. I see.

I represent the Campus Crusade for Cthulhu. We're a group of students devoted to Cthulhu and his ways. So, you're a religion. More of a cult, really. You see, Cthulhu is asleep right now, and we're trying to wake him up. What happens when he wakes up? He eats everything. What? Everything on Earth? No, everything. The whole universe. Even the people? Yes.

Especially the people. Well, if he's just going to eat you, why do you worship him? If you worship Cthulhu, you get eaten last. I figure it'll take about a week to eat everything else, and then he'll get around to me. That's very nice. But what the hell do you want? As I said, we're trying to wake Cthulhu up. So, can I have some of your blood? What? Blood. It doesn't have to be yours.

Maybe you have a disobedient child that could discipline for you, or a fresh steak you could squeeze? No, I don't think so. I've got some old band-aids. They're a little bloody and covered with old pus. Pus is good. We can use pus. Oh, and the cat killed a bird in the backyard. Ah, and you'd like us to punish the cat, torturing it slowly and draining all its blood into ziplock baggies. No, thank you. But you can have the dead bird.

Excellent. Most excellent. Soon, almighty Cthulhu, soon you will awake in the very fabric of space and time. Nay, reality itself will be devoured in your wake. Would you like a shoebox for the bird? Yes, please. Wasted tape. And now, Mr. Tinsdale goes to the restaurant.

Here is what we would do if we were dining over dinner at a restaurant or perhaps even a small buffet, but it wouldn't be because we wouldn't be dining over a buffet. In fact, buffet would be f***ing served to us. So, is it clear? Good. Beginning with point one. Point one, entering the restaurant. Being a restaurant, not some sort of buffet, as we have previously established in pre-point one, two, and three. Clarification, please. Yes.

This restaurant, as you call it, this is a restaurant of the literal sense and not of the figurative sense. If I were to infer what your point might be, if in case you had a point, then this would be what I would have interpreted your point to have been that at particular point in time. That would have been the fact that this is not in fact a true...

and real restaurant or establishment of any kind serving any type of food in a literal and not in a figurative sense. Figurative meaning, of course, that is in a fiction and not in a reality, which of course we are not in. Now... Yes. Are there any octopuses? Not that that position is necessarily relevant to the point. However, it will be noted in the record that you have made an objection as to the point of Octopus as being in this scene, which I have not previously established.

Okay, that's good for now. Thank you. Right. Now, where were we? We were entering the restaurant. Entering by meaning entering, of course, we mean leaving our mode of transport, which may be a cart, horse, buggy. car, cab, or other sort of mobile transport such as a bus.

Or a airplane, although getting an airplane into the scene would be rather difficult. Even though it is in some cases a figurative sort of scene and not a literal sort of scene, which means we are not in fact standing in front of a restaurant or even sitting in front of a restaurant or...

even existing where a restaurant might be, because there is no restaurant and there is no us. Us would be, in the figurative sense, the projection of our own beings into this situation we've created, into which we are trying to throw every such scenario. so that we may understand fully, exactly, and completely understand what we are proposing to do. I see. Well, yes, you do see figuratively, because, of course...

Seeing literally would mean you actually are seeing the points raised above my head. And I have no points on my head. So. Having said that, we are now going to be entering the restaurant, which, as I have said in point two, that we were actually exiting another vehicle at the time, or to a point we were going to be entering this establishment. By entering, of course, we mean passing through the doors.

Naturally, the front doors, and it would be doors and not windows, because, of course, windows would be inappropriate in this particular situation. Not that I would make such a... western judgment on doors versus windows because as we all know in some parts of the country they have neither doors nor windows they have only entrances which would be classified as both door and window and therefore would be traveling through

Clarification, please. Yes. You said that it would be the front door and it would not be the back door, or perhaps it might be a window. Yes. If the front door were wood, then would the wood back door... using the front door or the window which might be of wood and were then would the wood front door do well? I think the answer that you're seeking in all of your exposition there would be no. Now, moving on along, point three, entering the doorway.

And I see with a clock in the wall, unfortunately, we run out of time, but you're on us next week when we go through the door and we actually enter the restaurant. Thank you, and good night.

And that's this week's show. Thanks so much for participating in the Sonic Society. Return with us next week as we listen to a new turn on a very old story. Mary Shelley's Frankenstein by Willamette Radio Workshop. Until next time, I'm Jack Ward. Join us, won't you? The Sonic Society was produced and directed weekly by Andrew Dorfman and Jack Ward. Theme music by Sharon B. The Society originates from CKDU in Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada, which can be found on the web at www.ckdu.ca

and is also rebroadcast through affiliated stations around Canada and the United States of America. Look for upcoming episodes and schedules for the Sonic Society through our website at www.sonicsociety.org See you next week at this same time in the society. Until then, I'm Jack Boyd. Now you seem to me to be a connoisseur of the best of radio drama. In which case, make sure you're subscribed to the Monday Matinee feed.

There we have our weekly series of dramatic, theatrical, classic, eclectic, and live radio drama. So yeah, either the main Mutual Audio Network feed for all types and genres of audio drama, or the Monday Matinee. And we'll see you there. The Mutual Audio Drama Network, where we listen and imagine together.