The First Date Debate

to be omnipresent. They're never not around. People are always going to be struggling with this stuff. So let's go ahead and tackle one at a time. Huh was a good word at the big words? You know? You know it's funny. Sometimes I plan to say big words, but sometimes they just come to me, and that one came to me. So, um, jare is that vernacular? Is that correct? Vernacular? Vernacularly? Vernacularly?

I told Tori before the podcast started to have from Mike ready to go, because we want a female perspective. And the first question I ask her the mic is off, you know, it's just clearing my throat. And I also wasn't listening to you guys, but yes, sure, okay, great cool. Anyways, Jared Jared at the top of this he had some questions for us. He said, if you were to go on a first date, he wasn't sure what kind of

questions he was supposed to ask on that day. And I think that a lot of you guys might be struggling with the same issue. So Jared was able to find a wonderful piece of online literature that kind of gives eighteen uh first date questions advice. Yeah, we know that first dates are they could suck, you know, not as bad as suck a dating, but you know what I mean, they could potentially suck, and they're just hard. There's a lot of anxiety, a lot of pressure, a

lot of expectations. You love the idea that you never have to go on a first date again. Yes, yeah, I mean first dates are fun because there there's a little sliver of fun because you're exploring new options. There's excitement in the air. You have to kind of you know, you want to dress up, make sure you look good. But it's also just so stressful. Anytime you know, people are like, oh, I'm going on a day eight tonight, Like, yeah,

I'm I'm watching Netflix tonight. I'm sorry you have to do this to yourself, Tory, what about you, dud, do you enjoy going on first dates? I love dates, first dates. I just love any and all dates, even if they're miserable. I'm like, this is so funny. I'm having such a good time. I guess we need to all be like Tori. But it's because I just love people. So I'm like, if I can meet you and get to know what your mom's name is, hit me every single time I

see you, that's for other reasons. Show up on time for once in your life and things will change. What about you, Gin, Are you happy you never have to go on the first date again because you're married. There's actually one specific moment when we were flying back from Europe. But I was walking through the airport in Boston, Logan Great Airport. There's banners all over the place, Bruins, Patriots, socks.

Everything was under construction. It was it was a nightmare. Anyways, there was there was one moment I remember I looked over and I don't remember exactly what I saw, but uh, I had the thought that I was like, I'm so so happy. I don't have to go on a first date ever again. So you didn't like or states like Tori, I don't. I didn't mind them, but it's just like there is like a potential for them to go horribly wrong, and there is humor in that sometimes. But it's like

I just rather would not waste my time. You know, I'm not I'm not twenty three like Tories anymore, so I don't really have as much time to waste. Yeah, yeah, I mean I get it, but I just think it's so fun, like you're meeting a tire new person and they're gonna be They're definitely a part of suck Army, so terrible daters. They move in for first kiss when there's no chemistry, you you deal with. There's been a time where I went on a date and I didn't realize I was on a date. You find this fun.

You find fun when someone goes on for a kiss and you don't want it. Oh my gosh. It was like having like kind of a heartfelt conversation. We were taking a long walk along the beach and um then like I was literally like yeah, you know, like my dad, and then he just like literally like angled his neck like torqued his neck to like try to kiss me, and I was like, I'm literally mid conversation. So he thought the my dad was an opening for she mentioned

her father. I'm in so then I just gave a good stiff arm and I was like, what you blocked the kids armed? About five guys, All these poor five guys, they're scarred for life. Yeah most of what you're probably NFL players too, So well then I was like, you want d one athlete look at this, But yeah, no, I think that was even one of my friends just called me the other day and she was like, yeah, like the date went amazing, Like we had great chemistry,

everything was amazing about it. I really liked him, but he went on for the first kiss on like the first date, and I just kind of stiffed armed him because it was just a little bit too much. And I was like, that's interesting because she felt chemistry, she felt um entertained by him in great conversation. But yeah, it was like, I don't really want to kiss you on the first date. I'm going to go out on a limb and say, Dean has never been stiffed armed.

I've been stiff armed, so I don't even know how to say it. STI I was speak of making the way that he said stiff armed. Um, it's funny that she was saying that story. And one very specific example came back to my mind. I was on the first date one same thing, great chemistry, wonderful conversation. Uh, and at the end of it, like we both definitely wanted to kiss each other, but we didn't kiss each other.

And then she texted me later that night and she goes, Hey, I want to let you know I wanted to kiss you, but it just didn't feel something about like the first date, Like you just don't kiss on the first date. Some

people are like that, that's fine. But then I come to find out later on, like on our second day, that she has kissed someone on her first date before, and knowing that she had chemistry with me and didn't kiss me on the first date, but then she kissed someone else on the first date, that kind of didn't sit right with me. Yeah, because it's hypocritical. She said to you that she doesn't kiss on first dates, and then she kissing someone to do it on the first

day and there was great chemistry there too. This is ridiculous, So I got rejected. One time. It was she actually I knew this girl from work and she came over and we were just hanging out watching TV, and I thought that there was chemistry there and and we just played tennis together and all that, and then I went in for the kiss, and she like, she didn't stiff from me, but she kind of like did that where she moved away and then immediately I wanted to throw

myself down a flight of stairs. So how did you recover? I threw myself down, Yeah, and then I recovered, and that's why I know. I was just like so awkward. And then we sat down for like in the half hour and just talked, and then she left and I never spoke to her again. No I didn't, but it was never like I would never text her see if she wanted to hang out again, because it was clear that she wasn't interested in like a romantic relationship. I'm not sure, but I wasn't going to test the waters

anymore because I felt so embarrassed. I didn't even want to open that door up out on that one. The nice thing about first dates is you just go to like a bar, get a couple of beers. You both are feeling a little bit more loose, little frisky, little lucy, A little lucy, little frisky. Yeah, I don't know why I said that anyway. So this is from a Love and Harmony website, which is a part of the Harmony

I believe. Yeah, advice from the e Harmony experts eighteen first date questions from the experts, and they talk about how stressful a first date can be. So here are some first daid questions. Uh. One they want you to ask who are the most important people in your life? You think it's a good first day question or too much? I think it's good. Excuse me, I think um a

going around right now. I think what you should do if you go into a first date with like premeditated questions that are like oft a normal script of talking to someone like that, Like you don't normally ask people who are the most influential people in your life. I think it's good to mix those types of questions with like if you were in a zombie apocalypse, what weapon would you choose? Like you have to have like a little bit of mixture of serious like that and like fun,

weird like critical thinking questions. I agree should you script? So? Should you script questions before? So in case you need like a moment, like a segue you feel the conversation lacking, you can go to it. I think a lot of people struggle because the first day can last reever, anywhere from one hour to five hours. You know, it's like,

if it's lasting five hours, it's probably going well. But I think a lot of people sometimes struggle with conversation filler and stupid questions like like the chainsaw one can lead to a longer conversation that one. For instance, I feel like, like, I don't know, it just seems a little heavy for me, but I can see the appeal. Yeah, it's hard because you can't really ask people like what's your relationship like with your parents because you never know

the status of that. So I get that, like who's the most important huh one? But yeah, no, like definitely, And so I get that. I get that you would have like a different angle to ask, which I think is creative to take in that stance. But I don't know, I just feel like I would prefer more like a zombie apocalypse question versus being like who has influenced you

the most? Because it's like that's kind of more of when you're cuddling or you're like, well like the pillow talk where you're kind of having the heavier conversation, but the dates just keep it light and it's a heavier reason why they're asking. So they say, pay attention to how your day answers this first question, how come more likely than not they'll have an instant reaction, like my parents,

my college roommate, my kids. In addition to understanding the other person better, this question allows you to access his or her ability to form close relationships. I have a Bachelor and Paradise story that I want to share with you as real quick, so let's go with it. This most recent season, uh, Dylan and Hannah obviously were one of the couples of the season, and Caitlin and I for however long we were on the beach for We're a couple as well, and I remember I was talking

Dylan one day. I was like, Dylan, like, what are you in Hannah talk about all the time? He goes, Obviously he's gushing about her, because oh man, we talked about everything. I was like, what's one specific thing that you like asked her recently? And he goes well, I just asked her what her family does for holidays. I was like, that's actually like a really good question, especially in that environment. You don't really you know, you can only know so much about them, So maybe that's a

good question for a first date. Is like what do you do for the holidays? What do you what was your family for the holidays? That kind of stuff, because I actually really like that. Yeah, it kind of like leads, uh, you to understand them a little bit better. At first I kind of judged you for thinking that was a good question, but then as I got into it, you'd be like, Oh, how important is you're feeling to you? What do you do if we do continue this? Do

I need to sacrifice what my holiday plans are? There's a lot of layers there. There's a question like this like that on here. One of the questions is what do your Saturday's usually look like? So you think that's a good question, kind of get a gauge of like what their weekends are like today. That's a good one too, Uh. It says how discretionary time He's used says a lot about a person. If she works or him works on their day off, then they might be highly career oriented

or maybe a workaholic. Now, if he or she spends the day coaching kids soccer team, it's a good bet that he or she loves sports, enjoys kids, and wants to help others excel. So you can gain a lot of access to that question. I would say, of the people that answer that question, what do you do on a Saturday, we're gonna say I don't know, I know this a little bit of that, Like, that's exactly what

I would say. I know it's like you would say that, Yeah, like I got my final eleven hike at Yes, somebody tomorrow a hike. It's actually pretty Here's a question, what's the hardest thing you've ever done? And the scariest good fair day question. I think so too. What's the hardest thing you've ever done? Dean get through six months of the podcast. That's fair Tor, that's the hardest thing I've ever done. Deal with us. That is very high up there. I would say my move from where I'm from, my

kind of like smaller town to Newport Beach would that also? Yeah? I had never felt more like what is going on? And I never cried more, and I don't cry. It was just lonely. You know. Another question, what's the most embarrassing concert you've ever attended? I like that question. That is a good question. I think you've probably win this one by a landslide, right, don't say you even do a lot of embarrassing concerts. Embarrassing New Kids on the

Block Jonas Brothers. That is the furthest from embarrassing, the most embarrassing concerpt. I don't know, see this is an embarrassing but I feel like people would judge me by me being like, oh, well, I've been to like twenty five Rob Thomas concerts. You know, feel like, Oh, that's that's interesting. That's weird. Why you know that's interesting? Yeah, that would be That's what I would say. Even though I don't find it embarrassing, I know people would be like, oh,

that's that's a lot. I can't that's a lot. I can't think of anything embarrassing that I've been too. Honestly, like, the most embarrassing concept I ever been to was with I Heart Radio? Did New Kids a littlock? Is sorry? Furthest from embarrassing? Donnie Donnie Walburg like it's all the subject. He would punch you in the face. It's difference of opinion, That's all it is. Wait, can we circle back? Love, my heart love? What is it saying? Don't bite the

hand that feeds you? Absolutely? Absolute? I just like, I'm not a big top forty guy. So like, if I see like Taylor Swifts performing a great performer, if we could have seen you, you guys, have everybody been seen him with Katie Perry at the Jingle Ball Oh my gosh, get out of here. Was front and slousing a teenage dream, screaming his head off. It was so excited to many. How many concerts a year do you go to? You knew every word to fireworks first? Oh my gosh, you

were Yeah, you were there too. I'm trying to put on a tough persona here. Okay, he started crying. I'm pretty sure you started crying during How many concerts a year do you go to? Let's go ahead and ball park this roight. I'm pretty lucky. I'd say at least, you know, probably four or five. I'm very lucky, so like one every other month for the most part. Man, that seems like a lot. Actually, somewhere like three or four. I thought you went to more than that. I feel

like you go to one a month. Uh, No, I've been. I can't remember less concert i've been to. Huh. I think it was Jones's Brothers back and like Thanksgiving And you're not embarrassed by that, No, because I look at my wife and it's actually, you know what, it's a fun time. So we went into a concert in Baltimore and those people in that venue were losing their freaking minds over the Jonas brothers and it was pretty cool

to see. Like literally the year three thousand came on and everybody started jumping off and it's like that song where it's like and then everybody was like the these thirty year old people like it's like, oh man, this is insane. Him, I gotta go to a Joel Bro's concert. I'm telling you it's a good time. Next you should be embarrassed for not going. I am. I am. Now? Can we double dates one next time? I would love it, Honestly, I wouldn't mind it either. I think it'd be great.

Plusy we could Uh, I'm sure we can meet them. We're friends with Kevin, I met, I met Kevin and Joe that day. I'm good friends. O you dropped something. We picked that up for you, name dropping. Yeah, anyways, what are the questions for first pure? Moving on? Uh? What's another question? What's your most valuable possession? Oh? The love in my heart for my friends. I mean that's

a good one. It says this first day question. Uh breaks the ice, and I'll help you discover your dates, priorities, passions, and pursuits. Could be a photograph, classic car. Maybe it's a tiny trinket that represents a cherished person or memory. Putting your date on the spot might make the first answer a little awkward. To let them amend the answer as the night goes on. Yeah, that's a good Let him amend it later on. Maybe they have some under

Yeah I wouldn't. I didn't, Yeah I would. I would say one of mine, if not my my number one. Most is the stuff simbold that I got when I was a little baby. Still have it, Still sleep with it every single night. And what's funny, I was actually thinking about cutting one of his arms off last week, but I was wondering if it's going to still hold the same amount of sentimental value if I do that.

How your heart lately? Let me tell you why? Because on the parachute that I have, there's this it's called like the d bag that you throw out and it deploys your parents. It's a deployment back, and so you can like customize it. And I was thinking about cutting off Simba's arm and using Simba's arm as the thing that I grabbed throw my parachute out that way, every time my skyed, I'd have a piece of my most

prized possession with me. But then do I want to have a three like it's Simba that I sleep with every night? I don't know. I need to think about these things. You know, what's your guys? If you were on a date and you heard somebody ask you to tell you this story, what would be your nation? She'd be like, daying this guy skydies, Yeah, I mean I would. Here's the thing. It sounds morbid, but when he explains it and makes sense, Yeah, I don't know, it still

felt work. I started because I should cut off my stuff Daniel's arm, but he's also doing one of the most dangerous things you could possibly do. Maybe not dangerous, but stream. I started with the head. I thought about the head first, and I was like, I can't do the head. That's that's a little much for me, and I snuggle with the head listen. But every night, can I ask a question because I don't know this obviously with Peter and everything. Rabbit a rabbit's foot is that's gone?

There no longer rabbit foot in a while. That's like a that's the thing of a relic of the path. I'm sure there are still rabbit's foots out there because rabbit foot the car around key chain be good luck. Yeah, I'm pretty sure it's still. I'm sure maybe not in California, but if you intend some other states, bless you. Do you guys have any Do you guys have any lucky charms that you carry with you? Um? Just ashually? Then we're getting really really cute on this episode of Well

cut and Cute. Can I know why your stuffed animals important to you? Like, what's the story behind it? Who gave it to you? When it's like the thing that I've had for the longest amount of time. I got it when I was like four for Christmas Love Lion King and it's twenty four year old at this point. Like, how many things do you want that you can say that you've had since you were like, everyone's got like a baby blanket, or like a setting animal, or like

a something that they have from a very young age. Right, do you have anything like that? You know for sure? But it's in a box and I don't still sleep. It's definitely trying to think I have a prize position of like it's probably some sort of Superman memorabilio that I have, and like, oh my god, I got this one.

I was like ten years old, you know, I wish you know, what I really wish was that I got something I got like Tom Brady's jersey in two thousand one, who tells him too, And I'd be like, oh, I've had this for nineteen twenty years, but I didn't I got a Terry Glenn Patriots or twenty years ago you were how old are uh? Twenty years ago? Is? Yeah, I love it. So I don't think you'd be able to well, I guess when you're a kid, you wear like an oversized jersey, so maybe you can. I'm not sorry.

I would fit in it, but it'd be like jersey I got from Tales of One and he's still playing at an incredibly high level. Um anyway. Uh. And then we'll just do one more really random question. Uh, do you have a special place that you've liked to visit regularly? Now, before you answer, the reason you ask this question says, we've all got our go to sports that keep luring us back, whether or spots excuse me, that keep luring us back, whether they're funky coffee shops, scenic hiking trails,

or relaxing getaway weekends. Your date may have a local park here or she frequents or European city that they've been to regularly. Learning where your partner likes to go will provide insight into the person's taste and temperament. Really good question. Do you guys want to answer that? First? Rhode Island Rhoe Island. Of course, your family toys just gonna be like yo semite or something. For sure, yo semite because I grew up having family unions there every year.

And then also now that I don't live there in my hometown of Grass Valley, because it's just like that's North California. It's like outside of like Tahoe area. Close. Yeah, we're really close for about forty five minutes. Did you why don't you stay there and then come here to squaw where we are now, like, did why why would you not go home and hang out? Are you just do you want me to just leave now? Well? Why don't you could have like came a couple of days

early or something. Yeah, I don't know. I mean, given I work, so it's not the easiest thing to work. Yeah, you would never know a foreign concept to us. I know. It's just there's such a thing as ours and um full time, I get it. There's like two o'clock, there's three o'clock, so now there's half o'clock, like four thirty. Yeah, or like a quarter of o'clock, which is like three seventeen. Yeah, that's a little more. Yeah, you know, I see what

you're saying. I was trying think that Dumb and Dumber quote where they're like where he says it's like a quarter until whatever. You can't think what it is. Jared knows this. I can't think of it either. But that's why I got quiet, because I was like, what anyway, I'll think of it later. Do you have a spot team? I was trying to think. I don't think I really do you know? It's a funny tour said? Your answer was your Semite and Dean is wearing a Yosemite hat. Yeah,

would you like I should have got that. I'm sure you already have a bunch of Yosemiti memorabilia, but I should have gotten you. Yeah, I saw you gave Valentine's Day gifts to other people besides literally just been because I haven't seen him in so long, and I what the hell did you give Ben? I didn't see this. I got him a couple of cigars. I got him a couple of golf balls, a pen with his name on it. Pretty cool about Wow? Yeah, that's a pretty nice gift. I gotta say it myself. Um, a spot

that I go maybe just the beach. It doesn't have to be any particular beach. I just like to go be near the water. Yeah. What is it about being by the water. I don't know. I feel like so many people, including myself, love being by the water. Is it just the Is it being by mother nature? Maybe it's just like in the awe of the ocean. I think that we don't often get a bee next to something that's so big, and the ocean is just like such a hard concept to grasp the size of it.

And I also think there might be something too, depending on what you believe about us maybe being from the water. Sure like us as organisms forming within the body of water, like we we made it with fish a couple of generations ago, you know. Um yeah, yeah, I think that it just grounds you. You know, you get a lot of you gonna like take your shoes off, put your feet in the sand. You get to like kind of re recalibrate your whole uh being, you're you know, you're

being Yeah, Um, I agree. I mean so it's a pretty interesting There's a lot more uh questions, what's your signature drink, what's the best meal you've ever had? And they also say some tips for first dates listen as much or more than you talk. Don't forget that listening

is a very important part of the first date. I want to say, uh, to add on that is that's definitely something that I've noticed back when I was going on dates, is uh, people love for the most part, people all they can easily talk about themselves, and they want to talk about themselves. So if you consistently ask some questions about themselves, like these ones that you've been bringing up. Um, that in my opinion and my experience is how dates go well is when the other person

is talking most of the time. They're always going to leave that day thinking, well, like, I really had a good time on that day because I was able to share so much. So keep the people, keep the person talking, and stay interested in the things that they're saying. They also say, peel the onion, don't stab it with a pairing knife. Getting to know someone new is like peeling

an onion one thin layer at a time. Some people are over eager to get into deep and meaningful conversations, go too far, too fast, and so they say, you know, start with nice, easy going questions just to getting to know each other before you start asking really more in depth questions. Um, you don't want to just go right like zero to nah nah. So there we go. Some tips for anybody listening to this podcast that potentially might

be going on a first date. I think a lot of people that do that that goes year to a hundred, like that stabbed the onion per se. Those are the ones that are like, I really want to be in a relationship, And that's when you can kind of sense that and it comes off almost desperate. Desperate. Yeah, yeah, absolutely so don't do that. So you peel the onion,

don't stab it, don't stab, don't stab the onion. Um. So, do we want to do most Google dating questions or we want to get into emails, Let's get into emails. But before we get into emails. Uh. And you guys are not gonna want to miss these emails because every week I suckle Dating at I hurt media dot com we received a bunch of juicy ones, a bunch of

good ones, and we want to receive more. So if you have any more questions, experiences that you're unsure about or just want to share because they're hilarious or weird, I cucu dating at I hurt media dot com, please email us. We love talking about them, but they are interesting. Tori is gonna help us answer tom. Tori described these emails as extra juicy today. That's how she said in the pre meeting hour and a half talk we had before we go on every podcast. Obviously, because we take

this very serious, we do. We certainly do so extra ju see emails coming up. Be sure to stick around for those. We'll be right back, all right, and we are back with some extra juicy emails. Um, I'm gonna go ahead and read the first one. Guys, I it stinks not having Mark here because Mark just it's such a good reading voice. It's just so hard to compare because he's so good at it. You do your best market before core you're great as well. But there's only

one Mark link Mark my Mark. What the hell did I say? Molansen? Is that a baseball player? I feel like Mr Molansen? Uh? Yeah, So we have an email from LEXI. I'm going to read this. We're just gonna alternate. Uh. And then at the end of this podcast, actually, let's do this. We're all going to read one email from a listener at the end of this podcast, email us at I Second Dating at iHeart media dot com and tell us which of us you preferred to read the emails?

Because please please, because I'm always helf conscious about it. I think you have a great It's it's funny. So Jared and I think we can talk about this. We acted quote unquote acted in a commercial about a couple of weeks ago for the movie Love. Promercial comes off very soon. We're very excited for a movie and Jared and Ashley's acting ability is so far superior. To mine. There was for a good year, year and a half, two years there was there was mold funny I'm joking.

There were multiple instances where you guys were just having a conversation, and it took me like five seconds to be like, oh, we're in a scene right now. Like I literally thought that you guys were just having a conversation with each other, and then it took me so much time to figure out that you guys were actually you were acting at the time. It pretty much happens every week on this podcast. We're like talking for eight minutes and you're like, oh my god, recording recording, No.

But I was like I was, I was genuinely impressed, and I think that ability that you have is gonna uh yeah. Anyways, this one, this source is from Lexi and Alexei says, so this isn't a dating question, but I really need a man's opinion. I'm twenty two, my brother is twenty five. We grew up constantly bickering with a love hate relationship, as most siblings do, but he's

always been closed off. Our parents are divorced for about six years, and my brother and I went through a very hard time because of the divorce fast forward, and now he just got engaged and is getting married this December. My family loves his fiance, and she and I got close very quickly. However, my brother has increasingly shut himself off from my family and only makes time for his

fiance's family. I recently told him how hurt this makes us, and its spirals from there, with him telling my mom and I that he doesn't want to be around drama. I've told him how I feel, my mom has told him how he feels, how she feels, and my stepdad has too. We're currently not speaking to him and he's not speaking to us. Do I just move past this? Do I tried talking to him again? I feel helpless

and I don't even feel like he's my brother anymore. So, long story short, she has a brother, Her brother's engaged. Her engaged brother focuses on his fiance's family and no longer speaks to their family, and she's upset about it. My advice would be trying to move past this and talk to your brother again, because I think, Lexie, you're going to regret this one day, especially if you go a long extended period of time with how talking to him.

I know he probably you're probably mad at him, and he's probably making a mistake by spending more time with his fiance family than rather than his own family. But try to big, to be the bigger person, because I guarantee you if this goes longer and all of a sudden it spirals into a ten year span of you not talking to each other, I feel like you're going to really regret it because unfortunately we only have very

limited time on this earth. Um, So maybe my advice would be, as much as it sucks, swallow your pride and try to reach back out. Yeah, it would suck to uh to not go to his wedding right, and then a couple of years later, be like dang, and like maybe like in five years they somehow recover the relationship, but it's too late to have obviously go back in time and go to the wedding right. So it's like figure it out now, so that way you can be

there for him during that moment. And especially if if she's close with the fiance, maybe she can just continue to grow the relationship with their family and then by association, her and her brother will go close. Or Lexi can reach out to the fiance and kind of explain the situation and see if the fiance they can help in any way. I my recommendation would be to not bring up how they feel anymore and make it like, how can we help you with the wedding to make it

less stressful? How can we help you, um, plan the rehearsal dinner? What would you like for the rehearsal dinner? Because I know that the the groom plans the rehearsal dinner, So just being like, how can we be more hands on with that? Do you need me to do invites? And just come along it in that way where you're not even addressing obviously he clearly understands how she and her family feels and that would be so hard, but addressing it in a way of just hey, we're not

attacking you anymore, like how can we just help? Yea, So make it known that you want to reach back out without saying, hey, I want to fix this, because like you said, if you reach out and ask if they need help with the wedding, that already just like no emotions. Just make it how can we help? Yeah?

Because that that makes it known that you're reaching out that you want to talk exactly and if you will most likely be like, yes, please help us as like wedding planning, you guys, you know not you guys you know how crazy wedding do you know? Oh yeah, that's a good point. Do you guys have any strained relationships

with siblings or family members? Yeah, but uncle's odds that I've I knew as a kid in growing up, but you know, in my adulthood, I don't really informed any close relationships with But yeah, I've had two family members disown themselves from the families. But just like I said, like, I wasn't I mean, I wasn't super close to them, just family cookouts and things of that nature. Tori, No, not at all, like even extended family. I'm extremely blessed

in that route. Hashtag blessed. My sister got married and well she it's not that she didn't invite us to the wedding. She had like a courtroom wedding, so none of us were there. Well, she invited me, but she was like, hey, my wedding is in four days. Uh do you want to come? And I was like, well no, I've got this was like a long time. I was like, no, you gotta work. I can't be in Seattle in four

days for the wedding. Uh. I would never say that we have anyone in my family has a strained relationship, but I would say that for Lexi if she has the ability to mend the relationship, especially before the wedding because it's such a special time. Jaredy can attest that because he's married, make sure you mend the relationship and try to be at the wedding to support both your friend and your brother. You know what's funny about the

dean coming to my wedding. So you were flying in on a Friday, and then the wedding was on a Sunday, and I remember you texted me and he said, hey, man, my flight got rerouted, Like he was supposed to fly to Providence and you were going to be at the boat for five o'clock. But uh you texted me. You're like, dude, I'm so sorry my flight got rerouted. I was golfing

with my dad at the time. It was in the morning, and you were like, so I'm flying into Bossom, but I don't land until seven and then I have to drive down and he was trying to figure all this stuff. I was like, oh my god, that sucks. I can't believe your flight got reroutted. I felt so bad, and I was like, I can have somebody come pick you up, and you're like, no, don't worry about it, like I'll figure it out. You just enjoyed and so anyway, so I felt so bad the day of I was like, man,

that sucks. And then Saturday comes and we start talking, or maybe it was after I think it was after the wedding was over, and I was like, man, it was crazy that I can't believe they rerouted your flight from the Providence Report to the Boston Airport, Like I I hardly ever hear that unless it's so bad landing conditions that they can't do it. And it was beautiful that day, and so you were like, I lied, I I just missed my flight and I felt really bad to tell you. So I just made up this story

about how my flight got reroutted. But I made it. You made it exactly you were. It was so funny when I found that out, because you your your text it was so detail oriented. I mean, it was It was very sweet that you felt so bad that you had to tell meself how I missed my flight. I think maybe one out with it was early. You had like a because you booked like a seven am flight at the lay over in Atlanta and it got into Rhode Island like a three. Yeah, it was. You got

in like right around the same time. I think bend or something. But I made it, and I would made it. I wouldn't have missed it for the world. And to Lexi, I don't think that you should miss anyone close person's wedding. Yes, I agree, even if you quote unquote get rewarded. Yeah, just don't cancel the flight. Don't cancel the flight, Lexi. Um, this email is from Lindsay. Here we go, Here we go. I'm gonna try to do my best. Mark You guys are the best. Hopefully you don't take this personally. Men

and boys are the worst. I truly, I truly do not understand. Lindsay does not understand men and boys. Dean and I are boys. So we'll try to get a man on this podcast. So I went out one weekend with my brother and his friends. I'm super close with my brother and met one of his close friends for the first time this particular night. He was cool and we hit it off. And hung out the whole night

pretty much. I wanted to go home because I didn't know this guy that well and him at the stage in my life where I'm not interested in random one night stance. The next week, he had me on Instagram and messaged me asking me out. The following week he asked me to hang out almost every night, like week nights and weekends. I'm pretty busy and work, so I didn't see him. The next time I saw him, we went to a yoga class and it was great. Then the next day he texted me saying he thinks we

are on different pages. Me, being confused, asked what he meant. He said he wasn't looking for any kind of relationship. Do you guys think he was just looking for someone to hook up with and thought I was playing hard to get. I wasn't too torn up about it, so I just said, okay, no problem, and haven't heard from him since. So I understand the issue. She likes issue.

Other well, he was the one asking her out constantly for like a week and a half and she kept saying no. Granted she works a lot, but she said she's not torn up about it. Okay, Well that is the question. I was just going to say her saying I'm not torn up about it, clearly you are. This is like one thing like I hate when people try to act tough in like a frustrating relationship situation by saying I'm not torn up about it, it's fine, everything works out. It's like, no kind of be hurt by it.

And she's like, I have this guy totally pursuing me. She clearly had work, so I think that she probably was like I'm so sorry at work and says sorry work. But then when they hung out, he said he wasn't going for any kind of relationship. It was weird. Why why would you text some constantly? Then, well that's what she's asking, why do guys do that? Why would guys initiate? Because I think this goes to a lot of our emails. We get of guys being like, hey, you want to

hang out, hang out? Hang out? Um, then they'll on like the sixth day, or if they sleep together, they're like, all right, I'm not looking for anything serious. I'm not looking for a relationship. And then the girls have to be like, Okay, we don't guys don't do that. We don't do that. We're so cool, not ance and funny and charmaig Listen, you guys have definitely done this, and I think that you need to be very honest in

this situation. Is it strictly most of the time when you hear response like this, does your head go he was just looking to hook up? Mm hmm yeah, probably yeah. I think guys just get ahead in themselves, you know, like or rather, guys don't think things through. So I think maybe he was just texting text. Like guys are very nearsighted, right, Like they see a pretty girl and they're like, I want to sleep with that, and they do.

That's the thought that and then they do and then they're like, Okay, that was fine, ye see you later. It's not a good mentalent to have. Most guys are idiots. But have you ever done that to a girl where you hang out with someone and then you've sent the text? Have you ever sent the text? I'm just not looking for anything serious right now? Raise you raise your hand

If you've sent that text. Someone's lying and someone's telling that My hand is raised, Dean, you're telling me you've never told anybody you're not and looking for something serious. I'm pretty sure I heard you said that on TV one time, like five times. Yeah, yeah, yeah, at least you can go on The Bachelor. Hey, just so you're not looking for anything there is I think I know this ends with getting engaged, like I'm not looking for

anything serious. I probably have sent it before to look but what like I want you to dissect why men send that. I think their issue. The biggest issue with that isn't the fact that they're not looking for anything serious. It's the time that they say that they're not looking

for anything serious. If you're not looking for anything serious, make that be known at the beginning, before any physical interaction has been hat, you know, like, and then leave it up to the girls be like, Okay, I know he's not looking for anything serious, but I'm still interested in hooking up with him. That's perfectly fine. Don't wait.

Like if the guy waits until it's upped together six seven, eight, nine, ten times, then it's like, well, it sounds like you just wanted to sleep with me and now you're ready to move on to the next thing. Okay, there's a follow up question that I have. Yeah, you're saying, figure out if the guy doesn't want anything serious Earlier on when do you ask that? And second when you say don't if you're sleeping with each other six seven or whatever times you you are a huge advocate of sleeping

on the first date. I'm not a huge advocate. Pretty big advocate. I'm pro. I don't think you can get there's not a spectrum of pronus. But yes, but so this is conflicting, Like I'm just getting frustrated because you guys are conflicting in your words. What have I been conflicted about? I don't think you should sit together on the first day. She's like, when do you bring that up? Because before you sleep with him, so it should be

brought up on the first date in your eyes. Look, I'm not saying sleep with everyone you go on a first date with. I'm not saying go on a first date. You're automatical sleeping with this person. If you go on a first date and it leads to to romance, have that conversation with the person before you allow any penetration. We advocate safe romance here and help dating before this happens.

Listeners out there, Yes, I'm sure you can imagine the thing that I'm doing, Like a twelve year old boy, have the conversation before before this hap stop hitting before this happens. What you need to do is be like, listen, I like, I think that this there's potential here. Do you Are you in a place where you see relationship

happening in your life? And if they say I'm not looking for anything serious, make that judgment call of whether or not you're comfortable with sleeping with someone that doesn't want to have a serious relationship with you, and that that's not for us to say. If they if they want to do that, that's perfectly fine. But then don't come around six days later and be like, well, why

is he not looking for anything serious? Because he's been telling you the whole time he's not looking for anything serious. I do sometimes think that guys do. And this isn't just a guy versus girl situation, but anybody. One person in the relationship will say I'm not looking for something serious, and the other person will say, oh, neither am I, and then they actually are and they're just kind of putting it off hoping that the other person changes. I'm

not saying that happens all the time, but it does happen. Okay, So to take notes, write your standards, down and live by them. So if a man says that earlier on, you're saying, don't sleep with him, Yeah, don't, Yeah, don't unless well, yeah, it depends, unless you don't want anything serious.

Eye exactly. Sometimes you guys are on the same page, doesn't matter, But if you're not on the same age, then you have to vocalize your opinion because if you don't, then the other person is not going to know what should be a girl's line. If a guy says I'm not looking for anything serious and you say I am, I am, it's kind of scary. It is scary, but

I mean dating is scary, relationship is scary. You know what's scarier having your heartbroken by you not saying anything, and then all of a sudden, three months goes by and you're like, by the way, when I said I wasn't looking for something serious, that's very true. And it's better than if he says I'm not looking for anything serious. You could say, well, I'm not going to be looking at your penis. Then no more penis looking. Yeah, okay,

next question. Also, I wanted to add there's a little nugget in here that I kind of skipped over, So because he's they hung out one night, right, and then she says that he added me on Instagram and then messaged me every day asking me out. And then he said I wasn't look for anything serious. He just want I want to I want to see Lindsay's Instagram. He said, like maybe like a little premiusous bet you Lindsay is very attractive. You up? No exactly? Like did he to

her Instagram? Was like, this girl's very very attractive and I need her. That's what it sounds like. Um, I don't know. I'm we have another email from anonymous. So this is from anonymous for reference. I'm twenty eight years old who is practically a v I P and Suck Army. I am female. Just to make that oh correct, Yes, merch coming soon, I'm not joking. Already tried creating T shirts. Oh, I don't know. I don't know if I can do

it like license wise by myself. But I went on like one of those T shirt making apps, and I already I have like a cool design for suck Army. I think it'd be cool. Can we do that? Can I do that? I think we should definitely talk to Ami. Okay, cool, I would love to and I want to talk to about a live podcast, moving them right in right into our email. You guys, is that what you want? That's what the suck army wants. We want merch. Okay, So I am the worst at dating, and a lot of

things factor into that. I've been mostly single my whole life. And if you guys I've tried to date have struck me along for one to two years and it has it has become and it has never become anything serious. Most of the guys who hit me up are I'm not interested, even in the slightest. I have put up such high walls from being let down so much in the past. I don't even know how to convince myself to meet up with any of these guys anymore. I'm

just nervous about putting myself out there again. It doesn't help that that my most recent X is still in my life. He never wanted to commit to me, but I still somehow feel connected to him and wonder if you will ever come around, even though deep down I don't think we are a match. It's easier to deal with the devil, you know, then pick up all of your baggage and bring it to the next relationship. Any

advice would be appreciated. She's not wrong. It is easier to deal with the devil you know, rather than definitely you don't know. But I think also people would call that settling. So and then everybody tells you don't settle in relationships, don't settle with the devil you know what

the word. I think you can speak from experience about this, because I feel like a lot of guys hit you up that you're not interested in even the slightest I actually really agree with that, but I feel like it's like something's wrong with me because I sit down with these guys and I'm like, you are so awesome, but I feel nothing that I don't know. I mean, I really, are they really awesome? Are you just a nice person to say that they're awesome or find the awesomeness in them?

Has there ever been an instance where you sat down with someone you didn't feel it, and then you let them go and then like you saw them later on and you really regretted it. No, but I have fallen like I have had that like woe connection with one person my whole life. Who's this person? It was like at this like after kind of Grammy's party like three years ago, and it was this guy. He um, he like went to usc All that stuff. He like came over to me. He was so attractive. Take it my

phone stead. I was showing you guys a picture. He's so attractive. Damn it. Help. I took a dating instagramp and he um. It was the first time I was like, wow, I'm actually like, I feel physically connected, like attractive to you. I'm tinkling. Yeah, I'm like, I like great conversation and um. Then he was like, we had to go and do this like a little photo thing, and so he was like, oh,

I'll wait for you. And his friend was there too, and his friend kind of kept kind of pulling us away, um or pulling him away from us, and so he was like, Okay, we'll be here when we get back. And then when we came back, him and his friend weren't there, but we have been talking for like thirty minutes and whatever, and I was like, dang, I should have just given him my number. It's a really long story and I'm not going to get into it, but that was not the last time you heard of it

from this person. But that was like the first time I've ever felt like a strong connection with someone and I've never had it since. Why aren't you with this guy? Now? He's dating someone else? Now I believe Okay, was he dating someone when you met him? So when I met him, I found out, Um, my sorority sister's friend friend something really connected, weird, convoluted. He was like in the middle of a breakup during that, so his friend was like pulling away because he was like, dude, you got to

figure out like what you're doing first. Well, that's a good friend, but also a crappy friend for you. Whoever that person is I know, but yeah, I don't. I don't know. Are you still in communication with this human? No? I don't. It's actually a really funny story. But I like, I don't know why I don't feel connected to people.

A lot of the times I think that I just love human interactions, so I can really go on a lot of dates with people that you love stiff arming guys, love it, send of my way, Um, But to really feel like I want to let my guard down with you, I have honestly don't think I've ever experienced. Yeah, So I don't know. I mean doan Do you have any advice for Anonymous about how uh she just doesn't even how to convince herself to meet up with any guys.

I do have some advice for Anonymous, and I think that what she needs to do in order to start meeting up with guys and feeling more of a connection is by fully completely dropping the X out of her life, especially because she says, I, deep down, I know that we are not a match. So first, first, and foremost, Anonymous, cut that off entirely. You're not gonna meet someone. You're not gonna allow yourself to drop your walls with someone else until you fully put those walls up for him,

because he is a thing of the past. He doesn't belong in your life anymore. Put that aside and move on to the next thing. Don't be afraid about bringing your baggage to another relationship. Speaking from someone that has a lot of baggage, it's uh, it's a lot easier to pack it up and move along if you just completely sever that whole thing in the past. Jared's nothing said yes, do you agree? Yeah? I was just thinking

about your baggage. I got a lot, I got a small friends, I don't have much space to store my things, and so I carry a lot of them in bags, and that baggage comes with me for every place I go, a big old backpack. Um, I don't think that you're gonna be able to fully find someone that's gonna pique your interest until you fully close the door on the X that's been lingering around. It's it's comfortable, right, it's the devil. You'd rather spend time with the devil you

know than devil you don't know. As Jared said, but if he's not your match, you're wasting your time, You're wasting his time, You're wasting everyone's time. Yeah, I think that the X is definitely X is a big one. And then the other one about going on dates with dating app, but you know, going on dates with guys dating app, so you just don't feel like it. I totally get that, Like, not a lot of people feel like going on dates, but you just kind of have to.

It's probably because you probably don't feel motivated to do it, because you slightly feel guilty because you're still talking to your ex, Like that's what I in my opinion, I would feel guilty about that. Yeah, I don't know if they're talking, but I think that she's still hung up hundred percent she's talking. Yeah, I think they're still talking. It doesn't help that it's still in my life. What does that mean? You never wanted to commit to me, but I still somehow feel connected to him, and I

wonder if that doesn't mean they're talking. I think that does mean means I'm interpreting it as drop him out entirely, Whether interpreting that as maybe one night stance are still happening. How do you have one night scene? Sorry, booty calls are happening? Drop that all together? Then? Yeah, no, I agree, but I don't I don't think they're like genuinely talking.

I think regardless I miss you, come over, whatever, and whatever capacity is, that needs to completely stop because you're not going to allow yourself to open up in another relationship until that relationship is fully close. That's my advice is laying down the rules. I'm laying it down, Anonymous. If you don't take this advice, then maybe you're gonna still suck a lot less next week, um or just as much as you do now. If you don't take Poppadine's advice, we have some more emails, and I want

to answer all the emails. We have three more to get through, so you want to read Anonymous, let's just do one more. I do want to take one quick break before we do that, so we can come back fully refreshed, rested. Yeah, we'll all grab a cup of coffee and tackle this email to the best of our ability. Is that okay with you, guys. It's wonderful for our listeners out there. Stick around through this quick break and we'll be right back to answer this last email or

three for you. All right, welcome back, and Tori seems to have won the argument because we're gonna do one more email before we close out this. I just want to be able to take time on these emails and when people write us in so we'll listen. I was there during the break. It was an argument. Way to spend this into you taking the high horse here. I want to take time to answer these thoroughly. Was I not my line in the debate? I said I want

to take time when we are listeners right in revisionist history. Anyways, this email is from Anonymous. Anonymous has to say, which is funny because Anonymous email this last time too Anonymous says, I'm in my early thirties. I've been divorced for close to five years. I'm a single mom. I've worked at the same company for four and a half years. When I started, there was a man let's call him David, that I found incredibly attractive, but quickly learned he was married, unfortunately, David.

David David is in his mid to late thirties. We've probably only spoken a handful of times. But about two years ago at he referred his neighbor, who was always also his wife's best friend, to our company work. I'm sorry, there's a lot of inner workings and weddings here, so she works here as well. Let's call her Mary. So David has a friend who has neighbors, Maryry, we referred to work at this company, and they all worked together. Now,

Area and I have become very very close. Almost two months ago, David and Mary found out that third spouses were having an affair. So I decided to reach out and let David know I was here if you wanted someone to talk to you, because I went through a very similar situation five years ago. He accepted, but we started messaging. Initially, it was about the situation, but it quickly turned flirty. After a few days of messaging all the time, he asked if I wanted to hang out.

He ended up being physical that night. Right now, we it says we end up getting physical. That could have been an We ended up being very physical at night to get Everything seemed normal for the next few days, and then all of a sudden, our messages became sexual. Cent of the time when we crossed pass at work, we act like we don't see each other. That sounds kind of oh, that was kind of kind of cute, kind of hot. We text daily, but at work we

literally do not speak. I'm confused about what he wants. I joking only mentioned how he's going to be picking up tons of chicks with his new haircut looking fly. His response was, I'm not looking to pick up any chicks. I took that as a subtle way of saying he's not looking for anything right now. But our friends at work, including Mary, said that they think he was implying he's not looking to pick up chicks because we are talking. Help me, So should I initiate a conversation to figure

out what exactly this is? Definitely definitely initiate a conversation. I'm wondering if he's nervous because they work together, he doesn't want to lose. There's a lot of let's say, David, who she's calling this guy. If David and Anonymous spark up like a more of a public romance, I think David has a lot to lose because it sounds like his marriage is disintegrating, whether he wanted it to or not.

He also works with this person. He also works with this person's best friend and neighbor, and so there's a lot of Uh, there's a lot of a very high risk factor for David here. Yeah, but don't you think almost it's always I think what David should do is I think David should just start a relationship with Anonymous. Make it known that this is not because now it seems almost just like a hook up, and he's trying to keep it on the data. It just is essentially

leaving a five year marriage. Maybe that's always interested right now? Is a hook up? Yeah, David's not like for a relationship. I don't think so either. Well, then he shouldn't do that could be bad get into a relationship at this point, I think the coworker thing comes from a lot of these people, especially I don't know where Anonymous are, but you know, you the people the only people that you really know are the people that you work with for a lot in a lot of places. You know. No,

it's true. So I think that that's hard to meet. Yeah, it's hard to meet. And you spend so much time at work these days. I mean, you and I can attest the only time at least three and a half hours a week, every two weeks. Also, it's like I get their different departments. But that is so. One of our producers did meet in the office, producer Danielle and

her husband, and so obviously can work. But like the fact that he's been married, he didn't end the relationship his partners, Like, it's just like he's not looking to date. He's finding comfort through anonymous and Anonymous sorry to say that very bluntly, but he's just trying to find comfort through you and I don't. But let me also say at the end of the story, there might not be anything wrong with that. It all depends on what anonymous. Yeah,

but he obviously I do like that. David said, I'm not looking to hook up with anybody anybody else, So he probably, you know, being cheated on. Maybe he just needs that comfort. Anonymous is providing that, So maybe Anonymous needs to back off a little bit. Okay, let me start with Jared first, then to you, Dean. When you hear I'm not looking to hook up with chicks or pick up any chicks, where did your mind go on that set? I believe him positive or negative for Anonymous both.

I think it's positive because he's not looking next. I think it's positive because he's not looking to hook up with anybody else. But it's also negative because Anonymous is giving him what he wants right now, which is just comfort and and and physical support throughout this time, which is a big factor after you've been cheated on. Okay, Dean, where did your head go when you first heard that? Say it again, just so I can see where it

goes again. I'm not looking to pick up any chicks. Um. I think it's good for Anonymous because he's already picked up a chick and he's saying he's not looking to pick up anymore chicks. But that could just be his way of saying like, uh, like his like way being bashful of like, oh, I'm not looking to pick up chicks even though he is picking up chicks. My concern should we not be critical of anonymous here for sleeping with a married man even though this is, well, they're separated,

you got cheated on their obviously separated. We don't. I don't think two wrongs make it right in this case. Okay, I assumed that once it was found out that had been cheated on, but a lot of couples stick together even through that. We haven't lying down with my costs, and they stuck through that. I agree with Jared. I

think that it's easy to assume that they're separated. But then I just read it while you guys were talking, and she says, almost two months ago, David and Mary found out that their spouses were having an affair, so I decided to reach out and then we got physical. So yeah, maybe they're not. Like, maybe David is keeping it a secret because him and his wife are working through this, the infidelity. I think it sounds pretty much like their separated. The fact that he's like, she's clearly

stating you can go pick up chicks. Clearly there's information we don't have, but he's in the mode where he's now single. And also he could be just having so much stuff to work through right now, because if you maybe he is in the process of getting a separation, getting divorce and having to focus on that while also still working, and then he obviously is a human wants comfort, and so Anonymous is giving him that. So maybe Anonymous, maybe there's a reason why he's definitely not ready for

a relationship. So I would have no expectations in that, and Anonymous, if you can't handle that part of it not potentially being in a relationship, then you should back off. But also Anonymous Hays has a lot going on. Anonymous said that she went through a similar situation five years ago, so she can um kind of understand the process that he's going through right now, so maybe she can, you know, understand that things are going to move a little bit slowly,

if they do move at all. But she did say that David was the one that reached out to her asking if she wants to hang out, so of course, because he's probably going through a really crappy time right now, Yeah, and he probably feels a lot better when he's with Anonymous. But I if I was Anonymous, I would not have any expectations. And if you do have expectations either one get rid of him or two back off from the situation. So give us just one quick answer. Should she initiate

a conversation to figure out exactly what this is? I think we already know what this is. You, what's your answer whether she should start the conversation or not. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know because if I'm if I'm David and she comes up and says, what are we, I'd be like, listen, I'm my wife just cheated on me. I think you're wonderful. I think you're great, but I just need to figure out my stuff right now. I think that's exactly how the conversation

is going to go down. That's fine. I think that that'd be good for both Anonymous and David. I think that it never is a bad thing to try to get a better understanding of how things are. Where things You're right, You're right at the end of the day, you're absolutely right. Yeah, needs to say. The hard thing is it's like, even if she goes like, no pressure, I know you need to like figure this out, it's

still like, but I want a serious relationship. It's not going to end well, I agree, I think we already know where it's going. Time she needs to hear it because he might say, I'm actually like thoroughly enjoying your company through this process, and that would bring her a lot of peace. Or he might say just to let you know, I'm literally not looking for anything serious, like my wife and I are still trying to figure out

what we're figuring out. Yeah, if I was an honest I would try to think back about how I was feeling during that time, and then that put yourself in david shoes and hopefully you can understand a little bit better. So so it's the animous then for an anonymous reach out to him, but come at him like, look, I want to be here for you. If you need to help, I'm here, but for my own sanity, I need to understand about like where you're coming at, what you're coming

out this. I think she's be like, I'm kind of getting feelings. Yeah, I think that's I think that's exactly how his approach. But I want her to write us back in once this happens. Anymous, if you listen to this, we want to keep updated with you and David and Mary too. Mary, she was kind of like sprinkled, and we didn't really know much about We don't know anything about Mary. I don't know why Mary is a factor in this story. I don't know. Mary's a coworker who's

like her best friend in now helping her. So Anonymous, please keep us updated every week. Last thing you do before you leave work for the weekend to give us an update on you and David, because we're curious. We're invested now in your love story. Anyways, that's gonna do it. For this week's episode of Help I Suck a Dating, Big thank you to Jared and Tori and e Harmony's eighteen first date questions that you should ask very googleble.

I want to know some of your guys first date experiences, so email us I Suck a Dating at iHeart media dot com share some of those with us. Will continue to share some of ours with you. It's easier to share um with a little bit of perspective, though. Big thank you our emailers, Lexi, Lindsay and our two anonymous emailers best of luck. We hope your our advice helped you guys, at least in a in a slight amount, or if it didn't, just do the opposite voice said,

which is what I always refer to people to do. Anyways, anything we say to the opposite um, thank you to the listeners, thank you to the emailers, thank you to you guys. Thank you to Tore for once again chiming in with some great information. It's always nice having a female perspective because Dean and I sometimes just ramble and sound like little boys. So remember what she said, man and boys suck. Man, boys suck. Jean, we suck, suck, suck, sucks,

sucks um Tori's opinions. Toris like a tomboy though, so but I like that. She's you got a hard exterior, you know, your tough chick, but you really just sap, teach, keep down. It's like it's like a two and a half boys and the girl. I guess I'll take that as what it is. I guess, thank you, say thank you. I don't know, I don't know. I got nothing for you on that one. Thank you. Anyways, be sure to sooner next week where maybe we will suck just a

little bit less. Follow help by Suck at Dating on I Heart Radio or wherever you listen to podcast