Red Carpet Official

No what needs to hear this? But like a quick backstory, a couple of months ago, I don't know if you guys heard, Henry Cavill got announced that he's reprising his role as Superman, which I was very much anticipating and very excited about because I really enjoyed Manistel and I love Henry cavill playing the superhero playing Superman, and he hasn't been in a movie quite some time because they've made seventy four thousand Batman's which is okay, I love Batman,

but just give me my Superman. So they finally announced that he's back. He made a cameo and black Adam, here we go. Henry Gavelo announced he went on all this press tour. He was on UM seacrestin Kelly. Obviously, I heart Radio Seacrest tie right there and said I'm back as Superman for future films, and then two months later it's reporting that it might not happen, and it's very frustrating and I don't need to I don't need

to vent about it anymore. I never I'm obviously not as big into the superhero comic book thing as you are. I do remember seeing Man of Steel, and I think I saw in theaters, which is pretty rare for me to a c A movie in theaters and be for it to be a superhero movie, because I'm not a big superhero movie fan. I saw me in the Steel in theaters and this hasn't happened many times to me in my life. I want to say three, maybe last maybe maybe too. Don't tell me what I think. I think.

I think you know where this is going. It was one of the very few movies where I really strongly considered leaving the middle of the movie. Why it was so so bad, I don't, honestly, my blood is boiling right now. I don't want to talk about it because it's just gonna piss like. Here's the thing with that is, if I had no pre understanding of Superman, which I don't, I do, but I don't, you know, like I have the general idea of Superman's um origin story, lot of stuff.

If I had zero, that movie sets up absolutely nothing. All of a sudden, Lois Lane comes in. Oh he's in love with her. When did that happen? I have no idea. Hope she got lost in a tornado, but don't worry, Superman is always going to be there to

save her. It was it was lost in it. I don't remember that's that would be that part of it was almost as bad as um the Avatar the Last Airbender movie, And because that was the point in the conversation when I can no longer take you seriously if you're comparing Man of Steel to Airbender or whatever the hell it is, Avatar the Last Airbender. Yeah, we're not having this kind of For the record, I'm a big fan of the cartoons of Avatar the Last Airbender or

when I was younger, and the movie huge disappointment. Man of Steel. I didn't have expectations and I was still disappointed. So that's to say is about that. But I'm happy to move on because I don't want you to reach out through the screen and strangle me. Um. So what's going on, Jared, how are you. I'm good. Actually, we have a hot topic including and involving a Batman Robert Pattinson. Why don't we just get right into the first hot

topic because you know, nice little segue. So the star of the New Batman movie, which I did very much like Robert Pattinson, I didn't like it. I didn't love it. The first time I saw it. I thought it was okay. But I saw it again and I liked it a lot more. Can I say before you get before you

get into the hot topic. I liked it. The thing I didn't like about it was it was like, the Riddler is his main enemy this movie, and then you don't see the Riddler for like an hour and a half, and you're like, what happened to the guy that he was supposed to be fighting against? Yeah, there's one of my gripes in the movie is that there's just way too much going on. I couldn't agree with you more exactly.

The Riddler has gone for a good like hour of the movie, and you're like, Okay, that's right, He's still in this movie. Because there's just so much going on with all these different characters, and it is far too long. I'm all down for a three hour movie. But when you know I'm two and a half hours in and I'm like, okay, I'm feeling it, then you should have cut the movie by thirty minutes. Anyway, Robert Pattinson and Suki Waterhouse made their red carpet debut after five years

of dating. Can I also just have a little gripe as well? Towards the English language? Why is the t silent with debut? David? I don't know. That's two questions, soft Tea, What the hell is? Why could you imagine trying to learn English and reading that word? Why would anybody read that word other than debutt? Day? But how is that debut? I'm gonna google this real quick because I'm also curious. So anyway, while you google it, I'll continue with the hot topic. Five years of dating, Robert

Pattinson Suki Waterhouse made their red carpet day. BEU, that's crazy. I mean, I'm sure that they've posted publicly, have grown out in public, and have had pictures taken in them. But anyway, December three was the day that will live in infamy where the Batman star Robert Pattinson and the persuasion star Suki Waterhouse attended The Dire Men Fall If I'm saying that right, it's the three Show and Giza, Egypt. Wow,

that's pretty awesome. They walked to red Carpet together for the very first time, and they've been linked since two thousand and eighteen. The couple have kept their relationship as private as possible, with which makes their debut all the more special. So, Dean, two things. One do you have any answers with us about debut? And two what do you think of some of the benefits about keeping your relationship private, especially you come from a public relationship as well? Well?

The debut thing, I think is just a mystery of language. Who knows why? Um? And the other question is keeping a relationship private? Man? Props to props to Robert Pattinson. I'll be honest, I don't know who Suki Waterhouses. Do you no idea? Oh my gosh, she's beautiful though, I just look through up. She's a model, and have you seen Robert Pattinson. Of course she's beautiful. Robert Pattinson is

also very beautiful. Yes, I can only imagine. Well, it's got to be different for these like Megas celebrities because I I would have trouble keeping a relationship secret. But the reason for that is you go on a dating show and the only thing people are interested in is your dating life, and so you know, you do you go to an event, that's all they're asking you is

who are you dating? Blah blah blah. I mean, we have a podcast that like when I was single on this podcast, I was dating people that I wouldn't talk about, and it was like hard to talk about the past tense in the current tense because like I'm not talking about being single now, I'm talking about having been single three months ago. But then the person I'm dating here is the podcast and like, well why are you talking

about being single on the podcast? And so then eventually like either that comes to ahead and we had to go our separate ways, or I had to come out like there becomes like a point in the relationship where you have to become public with it or you end the relationship. So personally, I couldn't do it. That's why, um, I've talked about this maybe on this podcast. I've definitely talked about it too, some of like my Bachelor Nation friends where because entering a relation and I talked about

with you. Actually entering into a relationship with someone from the show on the show is so much easier than like soft launching people on Instagram and stuff having been on the show, because like, oh, the world or the audience gets to see you to be in a relationship publicly on their television screen and they don't have to like randomly hear about it on social media because like people only there's so many people that only get their news from not their news, but I'm sorry, they're like

relationship up to it's from television, whereas like people are still commenting on my social media, which is funny because obviously if they looked at my social media they would know, but they're still commenting on my social media, like I can't believe Kalen's lived in the van for four years and it's like, well, no, she never lived in the van. We just talked about that on television, and so it's like you're using that information that you got four years

ago and just expanding on it up until now. So all that to say, I I don't know what I'm saying actually, now that they think about it, all I'm saying is I couldn't keep a relationship secret because it always came to a head before that point, and I'm very grateful that I don't have to do that anymore, because some of the most stressful days of my life were coming into this podcast, having to talk about being single in Los Angeles when I wasn't single, and then

feeling the wrath on the other side of it. So thankfully those days are behind me. Yeah. I mean, someone that can relate to this, and there was actually an All Sweekly article written about it would be Tasha Adams because Dasia was obviously the bachelorette, and she will talk to us weekly about her and the split between her and Zach Clark and how they've really never publicly addressed it.

So keeping a relationship quiet is pretty hard. I'm assuming also talking about why you guys broke up it's probably equally as hard because you get asked about it all the time. So I kind of want to read this because tatious it's pretty interesting to me, She goes, My biggest lesson was to remain true to myself, and I felt like I did that. I'm really proud of that. I feel like some people called up in the mix of everything and I think the best way, the best practice,

is just to be you. She's talking about dating advice, and I think with that all these things have come and it just kind of finds out your your true self. She kind of talks about dating advice, and then she addresses the whole Zach situation. Him and I both know the truth and where we stand. And I've actually never said anything in the media about our relationship except we're

no longer together. And I know people might think otherwise, but that's literally the only statement we've ever given out. I think that's just something about maturity and how we decided to proceed. And at the end of the day, no one else need needs to know anything else. She goes on to say, people really want me to be in a couple relationships. My biggest priority. Truthfully, I've said

it before. I know people don't believe me, but it really is just working on me, just kind of finding my own way in New York City, but also focusing on things that really make me happy, which our philanthropy efforts. And I really loved the fashion industry as well, fitness, my mental health, so uh interesting, you know what I do have to commentation for her privacy, Like she sets a pretty good tone for keeping keeping that private, which

is really really commendable. Um. Who also did a really good job was Claire Claire Crawley who, like she like launched her relationship online with her boyfriend and then like a month later they were engaged. And it's not because they got engaged after a month of dating. I think they were like dating for a year and then she just happened to like launch him on social media right before they got gauge, And so she was dating this guy for a long time and didn't really let anyone

know about it, which is very very commendable as well. Um, I do think that we we I mean not to take anything away from them. They did fantastic. We were kind of putting a tougher situation because not only do we also have the social media like they have, but we have this podcast which I love this podcast to death. I'll die for help. I suck a dating and stuck army.

But they were, like I always say, and there were times like and you can attest to this, I'm curious to hear what you have to say about it too, Like before you and actually started dating and you were hosting this podcast. Granted, you weren't quite as much of a philanderer as I was. You were always like, I don't think he really dated that much in Los Angeles,

so it was a little bit easier for you. But it was kind of stressful coming onto this podcast every week talking about your dating life when it was very unstable, you know, Oh yeah, I mean the good news for me was that pretty much it's coming on this podcast for me started to host simultaneously aligned with Ashley and I being together. So I've kind of always been a relationship. But can you talk about Can talk about that for a second, because you and actually didn't renounce your relationship

until like six months in. Well, we wanted to make sure that we it was exactly what we thought it was gonna be when we first got together before we announced publicly, because it would have been it's ridiculous of us if we dated for a week, posted about it on social media, and then broke up two months later, with all the baggage that we had with our relationship.

When we started dating, I mean, we had a pretty good idea this is gonna be a forever type thing, and of course when we knew that it was that was the case, you know, three or four months in that's when we decided to come out publicly with our relationship. But it's it's hard to especially coming from a bachelor's standpoint, you know, like you said, we come from this dating show. That's really what we're known for, what people really care most about us. It's kind of like a business decision.

And I've talked about it before on this podcast about Ashley and I, you know, whether it be doing brand deals together, posting you know, uh, paid advertisement, and I remember being so insecure about it in the beginning because it felt an authentic not not like the product it's off, but like to do it together. I was like, actually, people are just gonna think we're not a real couple and that we're faking it. And you know, she was like, who cares what people say? Like we know the truth,

that's all that matters. I said, all right, Yeah, that's

a good point. Actually. So it's hard because there is that balance between you want to keep things private and play some things close to the chest, but also for us with this podcast and with social media and the show, it is a little bit like, you know, people want to know about our dating life, so it's it's a little bit of like quote unquote business to us, which is wacky to think about, right well, and for us to not only do they care about our dating lives,

but brands that want to work with us would weigh rather incorporate our significant others into the break into the ad because it just gets more attraction. I guess, yeah, who gives a funk about us? Man? Yeah, Oh my gosh. So I went to the jingle Ball last week and I saw that in Los Angeles jingle Ball I heard Radio Festival put it on with Capital One. You're pretty much like an influencer at this point. Bro, you walked the red carpet, you were a jingle ball taking picks.

I walked in that red carpet. It's the first red carpet I've walked in, Like who knows how long, two or three years it They cared so much less about me than I remember them caring about me in the past. It was like, and I like, you know, you do a red carpet at least like four years ago, fresh off the Bachelor, that you would do like eight interviews, take a bunch of pictures, and then they would like usher you away. They bring into like a swag room,

give you a bunch of free stuff. I walked up with Kaitlin Killen looks fantastic, I look like a bum per usual And they were like killing takes a bunch of pictures, and so she walks out and takes a bunch of pictures. I walk out, takes a bunch of pictures with her, and then like no one asked me for a picture around myself, which is good. I took

a couple, but that wasn't important. I don't want that. Anyways, we did two interviews and then we left, and then that we were completely like brushed behind the carpet, which is fine, but it was so interesting because I remember those red carpets being way more chaotic and high energy, and it wasn't really like that. But all this to say, jingle ball. We went there and it was a blast. We saw Dualipa, Jack Carlo Um, Oh, this guy that I really liked, what was his name? Um crap, I'm

not gonna remember. I really like Deve Cameron. And then there's other there's other guys something Louis Capolli, Louis Capaldi. He was so good. If you haven't heard this guy. You have to listen to him. He is so talented and hilarious. Anyways, this goes back to what you just said. Um, it was what I thought was a child like a kid's event, like the I think the age range in my head was like ten years old to sixteen years old, like that was like their target demo for this event.

And even like the kids in front of us were like these younger boys who were dancing all the TikTok songs and filming each other, having a blast. And it was great to see every artist that went on stage. Pit Bull was there, freaking pit Bull. Um. Every artist that was there was like up on stage, cursing like a drunken sailor, like dropping f bombs. And I was looking around and I was like, there's little kids next to me. This is really like kind of out of

control for an iHeart radio events. So I want to go on record and say that I think that we should have uncensored F bombs and what you just said, Jared, that should not get censored. In my opinion, judging by the criteria, that I hurt radio, now I step forward for us. Yeah, but it's gonna hurt advertising. So I'd rather not. Um, we have to be a family show, you know, for the kids. We we do it for the kids. Dude, What was I going to say about

jingle Ball? Oh? I was talking about the Red Carpet. Dude. That's so funny because honestly, it is crazy. How when your first off the show, it's like E and Entertainment to nine and access to Hollywood and Good Morning America, and then you go to the Red Carpet years later and it's like, hey, the Cleveland Gazette, Jared, come talk to us, like, oh, I would love nothing more. Yes, please ask for me. You're like, you want to talk to me? Oh my, I'll talk to you for an

hour if you want. What do you want? And then they asked us like they asked us like two questions each and it was like literally thirty second interviews. And then I was like, all right, see you it's always about other people. They're like, do you have anything about the Victoria a great thing? You're like no, I don't really know him. They're like, okay, you have a good one, all right bye, thank you. Unately, we have a we have a fresh engagement. So they asked us at least

like pertinent questions, but it was. It was a sobering experience, not in a bad way, not in a bad way. And even I just got a haircut yesterday and the styler, the hair cutter, the stylist was she's like, your your Dean from The Bachelor, right, And I was like, yeah, yeah, I'm I was on that show. And she's like, you must get recognized all the time, and I was like, yeah, you know, no, I don't. I did a long time ago. And I get maybe like one person two people a

month that are like, hey, you're that guy. So it's definitely died. Hey you're that guy. Bro. I'm like, you're right, I am this guy. I'm the guy. I am a guy. My name is Dean Um. But yeah, so that's that's my little soapbox. I guess about. I heard Radio Music Festival. It was a blast. If you guys have the chance to go, you have to go. It was very very fun. Um. Well, before we get into so we're gonna have callers this week. Usually we do two episod it's a week we have

the callers on Thursdays. But we don't have a guest today, so we figured let's bring on three guests a k the callers on this podcast, So we're all going to do it this week today, callers best part of the episode are coming up. We do have some dating trends that I want to get into, the top eight dating trends of two heading into But before we do that, let's take a quick break. All right, welcome back to

help I suck at dating Dean and myself. We have some callers coming up to answer your questions about dating. Before we do that, I didn't want to get into this article that I saw in Mashable, the top eight dating trends of twenty two. Luckily this doesn't really affect Dean and I because we don't date anymore. Do you like do you go on dates with Kalen? Do you guys plan dates? We get dinner at a restaurant four times a week, the same restaurant. Oh no, but we

go on like dinner dates. You go on dinner dates four times a week? Yeah, that's it's it's a combination of like going on dates and just being lazy because we hate cooking for ourselves. Um has she has been eating chicken lately, so she's been vegetarian for the past three years, and she's getting into chicken because she wants the protein content. And she's been cooking a little bit more for us, which has been delicious. Oh and I just bought us tickets to Avatar Way of Water next weekend,

which that'll be exciting. Max. I don't know, I don't think so, Actually, you should go see it. I yeah, I want to come. I want to see it. I mean, it's like a three hour epic. I'm you love the first Avatar, right, I love that. That was the first. I've done it more since then, maybe like two or three times. It was the first movie I ever saw in theaters twice really, yeah, that's how much I liked it.

It's so good. It's so and I'm like, I'm I'm one of a billion people that say this, but it it was so good, and I don't I often I think it. It really goes overlooked as one of the best movies of all time. And I know you might scoff at that because you are, you know, you have a little more culture and and like you're more refined, even more sophisticated within the film industry, I'd say, And that's fine, and that's fine, But as like a non

informed person that watches movies. I do think it should be in the conversation for best movies of all time. It's definitely top ten, it's probably top five. I think you could argue top three. So I think it should be more in the conversation because whenever you ask someone what their favorite movie is, I don't think i've ever heard someone say Avatar. No, it hasn't. Uh. I think he gets too much heat now because I think it's

people just like being contrarians. So when it came out and got all this buzz and then it became the highest coursing film of all time, I think it was almost cool to be in the opposite category, which was, oh, it's not that good, it's overrated, and that kind of caught on. But it's a great movie. It's I'm excited to see a sequel. It was funny because a buddy in and whose single, He is a younger guy, and he was like talking about he wants to ask this girl out on a date and he wants to take

her to a movie. And he's like, oh, when Avatar comes out and take her to that, I'm like, bro, are you out of your mind? You're gonna take this girl on a date, a first date, to a three hour movie Avatar, a movie that you're going to be paying attention to, and she probably doesn't give two rats asses about no, no, don't go. You go if you go to a movie, which I don't think you should go to a movie on a first day anyway, but if you're if you want to, you gotta go to

like an hour and a half movie. I gotta be in out, quick, fast, good popcorn movie. Hey that was cool, even a horror movie. I think it's probably the way to go because they're they're always short run times, and it's like, you know, it's more of an experience because it's like the jump scares and you're like, oh, you don't have to like, you know, focus in on the movie. God forbid, Dude, she talks during the movie on a first day, you're gonna tell her to be quiet. It's Avatar.

You want to watch the whole thing. To issue with a hour movie, the biggest issue in my opinion is you have to catch like an early afternoon showing, because if you go like an eight pm showing and it's three hours long, I don't care how into the movie I am at ten pm. I'm like, get me out of here. I gotta go to bed. Seriously, it needs like an intermission almost, it does need an intermission almost. So I booked us the four pm showing, so I'll report back August. What next next week? And you know,

but yeah, well wait want, I'm so sorry. I meant December. Good God, next week. I guess there's no. That's the one thing that I actually don't miss about living on the West coast or where a place where it's nice all the time. I can feel the change of the year by weather here, you know, in l A. I never really felt that because August it's warm. But like you know, December is the same as May and June, and June is the same as August, and September is

the same as April. Here it's different. Like I walk outside, I'm like, who, so this is a chilly December nine. Yeah. I love that there are days here in l A where you're like, oh my god, it's fifty degrees and raining. This sucks. But that's as bad as it gets, you know. And then the next day it's seventy two and sonny and you're wearing shorts and a short sleep shirt all day long, so we definitely have it. Definitely changes a small bit, but definitely not as as major as it

does out there. Um, Vegas has been very cool lately, but no snow. Fortunately, you should go to the Raiders game when they play the Paths at home, they'll be pretty cool. Um all right, Before we get into the Callers, we do want to run through these eight dating trends of twenty two. So the first one is saving time and money with Zoom During the pandemic, obviously some people

opted for virtual dates on Zoom. It's still a dominant dating trend, as dating coach and e Harmony relationship expert Laura House said, people are much more protective of their time now. Virtual dates make first dates lower stakes. They do save time and money, though, but it serves as uh, it serves daters as a gauge over whether they actually want to meet someone in person. So that's still a big trend. I don't know. I guess if you think I don't know, I'm not. I think the dating the

Zoom day is over. I have a big advocate for being in person with someone. There's certain feelings and vibes that you can get when you're in the same room with someone that you can't get over the screen. There's a connection, you know. You don't get those things over the screen. Like, of course zoom was great. During the pandemic. We couldn't be together, we had to be six ft apart. It was we would rather be safe, But now I don't know. I'd rather just like, let's go on a

day and let's get coffee. And if it sucks, it sucks. You know, it's at least hopefully I get a good story out of it. That's my two stapes. No, I wholeheartedly agree with you. I took a I took a weed patch last night as I was falling asleep and yeah, yeah, yeah, I've been sick lately, so I did it to sleep

better throughout the night. And as was falling asleep, I randomly had this thought pop in my head that remember in the middle of the pandemic when everyone is like the world will never go back to the to the way it was before the pandemic, and I was thinking my head, I was like, we're kind of there, Like everything is basically as it was, minus like some supply chain stuff, and like the global economy is a little bit more left up now, but like your day to

day life more or less is the same. In my opinion, mine is at least, like I don't feel like I'm inhibited at all because of the pandemic as it was, so I think that when like people were saying that we were never going to shake hands again, yeah, yeah, yeah, that went away fast. It's it's it went away so fast. Everyone has kind of resumed per like status quo. So as far as dates go, I agree with you fully that zoom dates I can't believe. I can't believe that

they were a thing. And it's great. I I personally, if I was saying goal in the middle of the pandemic, would have never ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever ever ever done a zoom date. That sounds so miserable to me. I mean it's not. It's like it was necessary. You know, people needed connection, people needed conversation, especially if they were quarantined by the cells. But damn, it's not the ideal

scenario it was. You know, you kind of had to just go through survival mode there and figure out what you needed to do to get through. But now it's over. I don't I don't advocate zooming anymore, you know, because here's the other thing. People will say, Oh, you should zoom with the person to see if they're creepy, and it's like, if you think, like you probably know if someone's creepy or not prior to any type of zoom meaning you know, so if you think they're creepy, to

stay away. There was one girl many years ago that lived in San Francisco. I lived in Los Angeles, and we met through like a mutual friend, but we had never met in person, only on social media, and I like was really interested in getting to know her, and somehow we got on to the point where I was going to fly up to San Francisco for the weekend and like stay with her and like have like an extended date in San Francisco with her, and I like, as the day was drawing closer, like this was like

a Thursday, I left on a Friday. I was like, I'm flying to San Francisco to spend a weekend with a person I've never met in person. That's weird, and we need to like ensure this is not gonna be weird. So we set up a zoom date before and it lasts like three minutes, and it was basically just like, Hey, I'm a real person. Oh you're a real person. That's good to see. You can talk normal to me, and

I can talk normal to you. That's good. Like, that's as far as I'll go to the point where I can't imagine like zooming for hours with someone that I'm interested maybe in dating. I don't know, it just seems kind of crazy to me. So yeah, but I see that, I could see that, I could see the practical appeal of it, like especially like you were saying, people were like starving for connection at the time. But is this article saying that zoom dates are still a thing? Oh yeah,

they say it's a dominant dating trend. Yeah, cultural dating is still a dominant trend. I don't know. I don't know because if if man, that's so tricky, it's it definitely works for the right person, But I do think it kind of sets up a bad cycle of habits later down the line. Like I personally wouldn't want to be in a relationship that is dominated by like digital

like a digital thing. So if you're gonna be in a relationship or all you can really do is zoom and I understand, like just break the ice on zoom and then go from there. But like that kind of sets a precedent later on where uh like face to face isn't as important as like zooming. Maybe I don't know, maybe maybe I'm wrong on that, but that's I just don't love the love the whole concept. No, I agree, And the second one here, So we'll just do this last one because we do have the colors out of

lining up. But we'll talk about this pretty quickly and then we'll revisit this next week. We're hopefully we all suck a little less finding love amid inflation we talked about a little before. The economy is not the best right now. So there's actually a lot of UH singles out there in America that are a little nervous about their financial situation when going on dates. So they said, of the people that responded to this this pole, so they want to spend fifty dollars or less on a

first date, that's pretty reasonable you can do. We talked about it on this podcast. So many times you can spend six dollars on the first day, just go get coffee, chill out for a while, sit down. It's all about conversation anyway, you don't need I know that our entire culture is based around food and drink. It really is when you think about it, because everything is based around go getting a drink or coffee or food. But like there are ways to do that and save money. So like,

I get it. You know, it's they they actually talked about also singles wanting to increase transparency or finances in the early stages in dating. That's something. Man, money is just a tough conversation. But I get it because like I've had friends that have gone into been in relationships of people who have not been open and on is about their financial situation, and it's come back to bite them and ruin the relationship pretty much. So it's tough.

There's like a balance like how early is it too early to talk about cash and money and what you have in the bank and how much money you make and then but you don't want to learn it too late because then you know, once you start getting into relationship and you're like, okay, let's start splitting the rent or paying for food or like even got you know, buying something together. It's a lot. Yeah, I remember when I was making forty dollars a year as a recruiter

in Los Angeles. It was something I didn't really feel comfortable talking about for the second I started making more money. Then I was waiting, like, it's weird, how if you start making money that you're more comfortable with your way, more open to talk about it, and if you're not making as much as you want, you're like kind of more hush hush about it. That was kind of my experience at least, where I was embarrassed, I guess maybe by the lack of money that I was making, and

so I didn't really talk so candidly about it. But now, like with Klin, for instance, I've never had any issues of saying like, oh I make this much or oh I have this much money in my bank account. Um, because it's a little bit more of a stable figure, I guess than it was, you know, six years ago.

So I can definitely see like the like it transparency is really really important, But it also kind of like there's a lot of other variables that come into it, you know, like when you were when you were only bartending in Los Angeles three nights a week, I'm sure it wasn't something you were super excited to talk about

with you. When I was on The Bachelor, ret Man, I was making forty grand a year and I went on this show and like, I was like, dude, obviously I want to be with Caitlin, but I am neurished he's gonna pick me, and I have to admit that, like I'm not a rich man by any stretch of imagination, so uh, we need to figure this out. Yeah, I love. I had the same thing with Rachel. I was like, dude,

I take the bus to work. I you know, I have three roommates, like all this stuff that I like, and then there's like Brian, who's like a successful chiropractor, lives in his own house, and Peter, who you know, has his own gym. I don't know. It was definitely a daunting mountain there, dude. I remember one time somebody

had I think I talked about the podcast. I would say who was obviously, but they had to do a wire transfer on while on the show, and we don't have computers or phone, so they had to use a producer there. And I don't know why I was in the room. Maybe it was like the breakfast room, but like, I don't know why he was like saying that he needed to do a pretty large, substantial, like around seventy thousand dollar transfer, and you wanted to make sure it

went well. I was like, seventy thousand dollars. They have seventy thousand dollars in their account. Oh my god. I was like, I'm so screwed. And then of course, like I felt so insecure. I remember asking a buddy of mine who was on the show. I was like how much. I was like, do you have? Do you have a good amount of savings? It's like, hm, I am I really poor right now, like for what I have in the bank account, because I don't have nearly that much. Yeah.

I remember before I moved to l A, I lived with and I didn't live with my buddy that I moved to l A with, But we were like hanging out one night in Denver before we moved, like a week or two before we moved, and he took like forty dollars out of his A t M out of the A t M and it showed the balance on

his receipt and I like peaked at it. And you know, we were like twenty three or twenty four, so we were much younger at the time, he had like twelve thou dollars in his checking account, and I was mind boggled. I was blown away. I was like, I didn't even ask you. I don't even think I've ever even told him that I saw that number, but I like literally was shocked. I was like, how does someone my age have so much money? And like, how was he not

spending all of it? I was, I don't know. It's it's definitely like finances, transparency very key, but there are times in people's lives where maybe it's not something they want to talk about because it is a sensitive subject, you know, you know what elso the sense of the soldier before we get the joke, because we're you know, listen, this is what we talk about here. We're very open and honest. So I don't know if you saw I saw that. Like there. I don't watch the show, but

White loadus. There was an article that came out that like the guy there apparently was a scene where he was exposed, like he was totally nude, and it came out that he was wearing a prosthetic to make his and I was talking to my buddy about it. I was like that has to be a big penis. Well okay,

the SOPHEO James, I don't really know. But anyway, I saw that on barstool or something like that, and it got me thinking because I don't think I've ever seen another man's penis besides movies, and yes, I have seen adult films in my life, so pornographic pornographic videos. Um, I've never seen another man. I don't think, like in person.

I was trying to think about it, so I was like, I have nothing to compare except like when I've googled like average penis size for a man, because obviously every guy does that. But it got me thinking because then like I I was like, I wonder, I think I'm I don't know. I was like, I think I'm okay, but like it's such a sensitive and insecure conversation because you see things on like white lotus and i'm and then of course like I didn't look at it, but I can only imagine what it looked like, And I

was like, is that what women think is as normal? Size? Is that huge? Is that giant? Am? I do? I not know what small or big is? I don't know. I got me thinking, man, where are you going with this, I don't know. It got me thinking that I I have nothing to compare my own way except with what I can only imagine are the biggest Yeah, you know what I mean. Do I have a jaded sense of what like a good size should be because I was.

I was just thinking about them, like everything else in my life I can compare with, And I was thinking about finances as well, because like I can have certain conversations with friends about money and things of that nature, but like I've never been like, Yo, what's what's going on down there? How are you doing? You know? You know, it's just like I don't have anything to compare with. I've definitely snucked a few peaks in my life just out of sheer curiosity. And I'm sure you're doing just fine.

But there there were some, you know, like in high school and like someone sleeps with someone and then like

the rumors start circulating. And I remember there's this one guy, best looking guy in school, slept with this girl who he ended up dating, and she was like talking crap about his his member and how small it was, and she made a comment like it was like a pinky finger, and I was like, pinky finger I was like, and then I was and then my whole life I was thinking, like, not my whole life, obviously, but for a long time I was thinking like that's so small, like there's and

I'm like she had she was exaggerating. Obviously, there's no way she was talking the truth. But you're right, like you go through so much of your life and like I had that information for like in my brain and I was like, is that normal for a guy to

be like a pinky finger size? Because that it just it was mind blowing to me, and like, yeah, there's a lot of not like misinformation, but we don't have like the craziest ever, there's not You're not gonna go up to your buddies and be like, hey, can I just see you like flash and real quick, like pull the pants down for a second. Man, I just need to know, yeah, because it's definitely something that, um, I don't know. Do you think we should talk about it more?

I don't know, because then of course you hear about showers versus growers, And now I'm thinking, like, I like, I have an idea about what I think I am, but truthfully, I don't. I've also have I ever seen like another man's just because I was never in the locker room. Like I never really showered with other dudes, so I've never really been in that environment. So like it's like, I know what mine looks like. You were sit in front of a floor length like a full

length mirror, um butt naked and fully erect. No, I'm okay, well I've done it. It looks very very weird. It looks very weird. Yes, just like just to see, just to see what you're like body composition looks like when you're like that, because it looks it looks weird looking at yourself and seeing something like protrude out of you in a way that doesn't look natural. It Just just

try it for me sometimes. Just the next time you get out of the shower, just go and and do you know, just enough to get you to that point. But don't do anything like silly or anything like that. Um, but go stand in front of the mirror and just look at yourself and like turn to the side and like see your side profile. No way, this is not happening, dude. I'll just be so I'll be depressed for four months. So you're not gonna you know what you're working with

it just is a funny way to see yourself. It's just my body naked. It's just this is way t am I. But just like I've never like I don't understand. I try to keep myself in good shape, but I'll never understand the appeal of like just guys like because like hair, you know, like I have hair on my thighs and just like hair on my knuckles. That's why it's funny to see yourself in that like very vulnerable position, because it's just I don't know, it's you've done it.

I know you've done it, and I know you're just playing. Never I swear to God, I would tell you where what we been talking about in this podcast for that twenty minutes. I've never stood in front of not that I can remember. Like I've stood in a bathroom mirror obviously and seen from like you know, the thighs up, but you're talking head to toe. I don't think I've ever owned a full body mirror until I started living with Ashley. As I was gonna say, Ashley's got a

few in the house. Oh, she definitely has a few in the house. So now like, yeah, I could practically do it there's actually one right next to me. But dude, could you imagine if Ashley walked in on me as I'm just like standing there, what the hell are you doing? Like? Oh, we were talking about on the podcast. Don't worry about it. You've got some homework for the next episode. Just do that for me, just one time and report back. Don't give me details, but just tell me how it made

you feel, because it's like, it's very very interesting. It's not gonna make me feel good. Ashley just walked in perfect time. Well, let's segue to the callers, and it's a good place to take a break. We're gonna take one quick break and then bring in our callers. Be right back, Yeah right, everybody, welcome back. We've got Joe here calling in. Joe, are you there? Yeah? Yeah, how's it going, Joe? Thanks for calling? And what's going on today? Yeah? So,

just wondering, like, is it bad? Debate? Excuse me? Is it bad to date your best buddies X? Yes? Yeah, it feels it feels bad. I'm just gonna come right out and say it. Yes, it's bad to date your mean is it an ex like it's an ex girlferd? Or is it like he went on a date with this girl. I mean he so he broke up with her,

like he wasn't feeling it. They've been broken up for like eight Yeah, it's been like eight months, and again he broke up with her, and yeah, like, I'm I like her, you know, so I think the most the most important thing that you should do, if this is something you want to do and you you like her, like you say, is before you do anything, before you even ask her out, before you even expressed any interest in her, you have to talk to your best friend about it and okay with it? What did he say?

He's cool with it? But I'm still like, I'm still not sure, you know, I don't know if he's like just being a good friend, you know. I'm just I'm still not sure if it's the right thing or not. Yeah, I've definitely been in the scenario before. Um, and you you already have a leg up on me. I wanted to date someone that one of my best friends had dated and didn't even date. They just like cooked up a couple of times, and I didn't ask him, not

ask for permission. That's kind of you know, misogynistic, I guess, but kind of more like have him weigh in on the subject a little bit. Uh, And he got very very very angry at me, rightfully so, and I do feel guilty about it. So you've already got the leg up on me in that sense. If he said it's okay, then then yeah, then it's fine. Be gauys Like, if he does get upset about something later on, you could just be like, well, dude, you told me it was okay.

If you really didn't think it was okay, you should have told me not to. So I think you're I think it's fine. Like like you said, if you talk to him about it and he's okay with it, I don't see the issue. All right, Yeah, all right, thanks Joe, thanks for calling this. Thanks thanks guys. All right. I like when we have guys calling because I feel like we get better advice to guys. Maybe not better, but we have more like information to pull. First, well, we're

not as um sugarcoat. We don't sugarcoat our answers with the guys. Like girls was like, oh, well your goal will be fine. You're doing okay. We guys were like, dude, don't don't you out of your mind? Next up, we have Brandon calling in, Brandon, are you there? Acting to the audio. He's got a very nice profile picture by the way, I don't think the listeners will be able to see this, of course, but very handsome man. And he's got a cute little smirk smilee thing going on.

While we're waiting. There was a girl like him into Audrey's and she was so sweet and she was like, just by the way, I'm a part of Stuck Army. I was like, hell, yes, hell, yes, you are so so suck suck Audrey. She was so sweet, it was great. So it was like, you know, blending Audrey's wild help us suck a dating, which I do all the time anyway, when we record from the office. I've recorded from the

office and quite some time we haven't. I haven't been making eggs while recording this podcast in like a couple of months. It's been pretty good. Do you know that you mentioned it you have stopped that? Was that intentional or are you just working less hours? A little bit of both, A little bit both. I'm I'm dialing it back a little bit because you know, Ashley will probably you know, throw me off the second story of the house. If I started working if I was still working as much.

But um, definitely tone that back down. Plus it was also intentional. It was probably not the best way to record a podcast while being every two seconds being like hey, we'll definitely it definitely showed us your priorities and the really hurt to see. But you know what, we moved on. Brandon, you finally connected the audio. How are you, buddy? Hi? Sorry about that. I couldn't find the button. I'm doing good. How are you guys doing You're good, You're good, We're

doing good. What's going on today? Okay, so I'm kind of dealing with a little bit of an issue with this girl who I was trying to go on a date with and she canceled last minute on me, and then later on that night she posts on Instagram on her story at the exact same place with a bunch of her friends. Yeah. So I don't know why she felt the need to lie to me, but she did. She definitely didn't tell me that she's still playing on

going out with her friends. Like she called me earlier on in the day and text me to see if I was busy and see if I wanted to go out with her. I was like, yeah, of course. So I rushed home, got ready, and then she sends me a text like fifteen minutes at very get home, saying that she's feeling sleepy or whatever. And when I talked about the phone, she definitely didn't sound sleepy, so I was like, okay, whatever, And I was a little piste off because I had to rush around and kind of

get ready, But that's fine. It happens, no big deal. And then later on at night, I'm on my phone, I'm on Instagram, and then I see that she's posting stories, so I click on it and she's literally at the exact same restaurant that we planned to go to with a bunch of her girlfriends, having a good time, not sleepy, not at home. And it's like, what, what the why? Why why lie to me? Why be childish? Why not

tell me directly? Let's have an honest converse. It's not that big of a deal, Like just be oh, I forgot, I want to go meet up with my girlfriends tonight. Let's be honest, like, I have no idea what's going on. She spurred the streets, Brandon, she spura the streets man, And to me, the hardest part is that like, now you're forever a liar, and now I can't trust anything over something so small, like you can't you have to lie over some tiny like that, I understand. I don't know.

I actually don't understand lying to any to that degree, at least I don't. I don't get it. Here's here's what sucks in my opinion, is uh, because I've had something like this happened to me before as well, and all it did it for me was make me more were interested in the person. So I hope for you that that's not the case, because someone that's like disrespectful

like that is definitely not worth your time. What I imagine happened is like she had plans to go to this place with her friends, and her friends maybe like canceled, and so she was like, oh, maybe I'll just bring Brandon with me instead, and then her friends uncancelled, and then so she canceled with you. That's kind of how I imagine it playing out in my head, regardless of how it happened. Not cool, And I personally think it's like enough of a reason to kind of like stop

pursuing this person, you know. Yeah, it's just weird. It's all, it's just weird. People are weird, Like why lie about that? What's the big deal? And not to mention she posts on her storage, did you think she thinks she you weren't going to see it? That's the other thing. It's like you posted, you go out and of course you're gonna see it. That that's the issue. Is that okay, at least shot of me seeing it. I see it. Now I have to ask her about it. That puts

me in a weird situation. Now I have to believe the lie that she's gonna tell me about story and then and then now it's just why lie were We don't have to be like that, Like that's the main You know, women talk about what I don't want to put generalize here, but I've heard a lot of women talk about communication and the importance of communication. Well then why are you lying so much every for tiny little things that don't matter, mundane things? And I know guys

do it too, but that's the core of it. People talk about communication and they're so full of crap about it. Dude, Brandon is bringing the fire. I like Brandon, I gotta ask, what do you what does your gut tell you to do with the situation. Do you think you want to keep talking this person or do you think it's put to bed. I think it's put to bed once I

find out you're a liar. Now I'm questioning everything, and why be in a situation where every conversation I'm like, well, that could be a lie, that could be a lie, that could be It's totally unhealthy. So now I have to just go, Okay, wash my hands by, see you later onto the next one. I guess. Do you think

you're gonna give her a chance to explain the situation? No, because all, like I said, her explanation won't be She didn't look like she was sleepy and like her friends dragged her out because it was a birthday party or something like that. To me, it just looked like she canceled on me and went out with her friends and just had a good time and didn't have the goal to tell me about it. And that's ridiculous. You're an adult, Like,

let's have a conversation, Brandon. I really appreciate you calling in about this because it's it's not really a question in my opinion, it's more of a venting session for you. So I'm glad you can get it all out there. Um, I agree with I agree with you, Like any explanation she gives you, you're gonna in the back of your head be thinking the whole time, like, oh, I don't believe any of the things you're saying right now. So I agree with you. I think that there's nothing she

can really say to amend the situation. And it sucks, like it definitely hurts, Like you, you get excited, you get dressed up, and you are looking forward to this day, and then she cancels, and then to even throw a sault in the wound. Then she's posting stories from the

place that you were supposed to go together. So it definitely sucks, Like I I don't envy the situation that you're in, but it sounds like you got a good head on your shoulders in the sense that, like, you know, you're not gonna stand for it, because if she's lying about this this early on, what else is she gonna lie about later on? And like, what else does she have going on that she's not telling you about? So

I agree with everything you're saying. Definitely a crappy situation, and I appreciate you guys, listen to me and I apologize if I was vancing a little too hard. Thanks guys, but yeah, best of luck moving forward, all right, take care? Thanks bye? That was great. Yeah, that was great. Call back. Please every week please co host with us. Actually, all right, Next up, we have Amy calling in. Hi, Amy, How are you good? How are you guys? Good? Thank you

for joining us. What's going on today? I'm just calling to get some advice from you guys. All right, what do you got? All right? So? Oh, um, I want to know how I can tell if I'm rebounding or if I'm generally genuinely interested in someone, Because I broke up with my boyfriend about a month and a half ago, um, and we were dating for two years. It's been rocky for a while. But when I do start to date again, I want to show up as like the best person I can be and not use someone as a rebound,

you know, um? And I just I guess I'm asking, like, how can I tell the difference between using someone as a rebound and really wanting to pursue a relationship with them and and like knowing them for who they are? You know? Well, my gut tells me it was a rebound if you dated your ex for two years into only been a month and a half. I feel like, I feel like a general rule would be for every year you dated someone, it's gonna take like a good three months, I'd say, to really jump back into a

relationship or it. So if you did it for two you said two years, Yeah, two years, so you're only a month and a half into your six month yeah after X thing. Yeah, Like, I know I've rebounded before because I had a relationship in the past where I dated someone right after and it felt so real, it was so infatuated, and then um, shortly after sleeping together, I quickly realized that I wasn't over my ex um

and that had been eight months at that time. So I I personally think rebounding is totally okay to do. People rebound all the time for various reasons. Will Chamberlain made a whole career out of rebounding. Dennis Rodmin Dennis Rodman the Worm. The Worm was one of the best

rebounders in the history basketball. I think rebounding is totally fine, and I I kind of agree with what Jared is saying where it's like, yeah, one month per year you were dating share but also like there's never a timeline you can put on it, and if you meet someone soe and after breaking up with your X, I I hate the idea of saying, like, oh, I can't date you right now because I think it's too soon after my last relationship. Like you should just you should date

and do what feels natural. And yeah, some people might call to rebound you and your head might think it's a rebound rebound, but like, at the end of the day, if you're doing what you want to be doing and like dating a person you want to be dating, I don't really see the issue with it, Like there's there there's no like there's no set structure on how long you should wait, and like it sounds like by by labeling it a rebound, I think what we do is like we kind of like explain to ourselves and make

it right in our heads because the society has taught us that there needs to be a certain like cool down period before we can date someone else. And like I don't necessarily think that's the case. I think like you should just kind of do what feels natural, and like, if you still have lingering feelings about your X, that might be bad, but I think that's also pretty natural, especially if you really love the person, Like eventually those will fade and then eventually you'll, you know, you'll gain

feelings for whoever else. But I don't know, I don't think it's I don't think rebounding is as bad as people make it seem. Here's a question for you, so the new guy. Hypothetically, let's play a game where if your X came back into the scenario and said I want you back, would you take them back or would

you stick with the new guy? Oh? Yeah, that's the question, right, Like, yeah, if if your gut tells you I would take my X back right now because I want to be with them more, then you're probably not ready to move on to a new relationship. Yeah, yeah, I hear you. That

makes sense. But at the same time, too, she would maybe only want to take the X back because that's like, you have two years of time together, so you're way more familiar with this person than you are with this That makes this new guy a rebound, which is totally fine. But if you're if you don't want to use someone as a rebound, then I would say, you know, acts off the new relationship if you would still get back together with your X. Yeah, that's that's fair, that's a

that's maybe how we should start looking at that. If you think you're might be dating a rebound, then you can kind of understand better in your head whether you are not by deciding if you would take the X back if they came back in your life. So I do kind of agree with that, but at the same time to like, well, no, I guess you're right, Jared, I agree with you. I agree with you Dean, though.

I don't think like there's anything wrong with rebounding either, as long as you guys are on the same page and it's and you know that, Hey, you know, I'm not ready for a relationship yet, but you know I would still like to hang out. It is. It is tricky if I were dating someone that was still hung up on their X, like if they still thought about them, they still love them, they still wanted to be with them,

I would be upset about dating that person. So I think the most important thing is it's not the distinction between a rebound or not rebound. It's the distinction of are you still hung up on your X, because then you're not putting all of yourself into the new relationships. So that's kind of where I come from with that situation. I think, Yeah, I got you. That's gonna be my my like tester there go, you're like this test for whether you're rebounding or not. Maybe thanks for calling in.

We hope we helped. Uh. I don't know if we did or not, but no, buts what we do here. Thank you? Um, all right, Well so no Thursday episode this week on Jared. No Thursday episode this week, just just once a week. Well, well, we'll get back to our Thursdays next week once we are get our guests back in line. Um, but you know, condensed week. It's the holidays. Man, everybody's taking some time off. We should have like a like a listener of this podcast co

hosting episode with us. Is that possible? Can we get something like that going? Let's talk to the higher ups, Let's talk to our bosses. Oh yeah, they said yes, So let's do it. Let's bring a sucky datter to come in and co host with us. Yeah, I mean give him the email I would. I think we should seriously do this, so email. I suck at dating at iHeart media dot com or d M s on Instagram. Tell us you want to call host an episode with Dean and I and then we'll make it happen. Yeah,

that sounds fun. That sounds like it would be a real enjoyable experience for everyone involved. It could really go off the hay wire pretty easily, but may better content. That's all we strive for is to what we do, a whole enjoyable, consumable content for the sucky dators out there. That's gonna do it. For this week's episode of Help I Suck at Dating, Jared, I'm so sorry for offending you about me on a steel, but I stand strong

in my conviction. Um. I will report back next week and let you know how Avatar Way of Water is actually. I think by the time we record this next week, I will not have seen this and maybe two weeks from now. Um. But thank you to our callers. Let me try to remember the names, Amy, Brandon, Joe. Thank you so much for calling in. We appreciate you guys. Um and if you want to co host an episode with us, it's just spit ball here, just trying to

think on the spot. Give us a give us an email, give us a d M he'll definitely not sound as dumb as we do. I mean, that is quite impossible. It's quite impot it's it's hard to do, and we do that intentionally. Well, we want to set the bar low that way you can come in and just step right over it. So d M. S Email us I suck a Dating at i heeart media dot com. Thank you so much for listening to this week's episode. We really appreciate you. Be sure to tune in next week

where maybe we suck just a little bit less. Follow help by suck at Dating on I Heart Radio or wherever you listen to podcast