Momma's Boys

It's Stephanie, Mike and Mom Liz. Now that premiere is Sunday, October, but we have them on the podcast this week. So my question becomes, Dean, do you think I'm a mama's boy? You? I mean, yeah, You're a mama's boy and a daddy's boy. This boy sounds weird. You're just a boy that loves his parents. Uh. Yeah, I guess I don't know if I'm a MoMA's boy. I don't think Ashley would describe me as a MoMA's boy. Ashley is way more of like a mama's girl than I am a mama's boy.

Actually does love her mother. Second best friend besides her sister. I would say, right, oh, absolutely, she talks to her parents. I'm not joking at least three times a day on the phone. At least, it's insane, it's fantastic, Like I actually envy it because I want to be closer with my parents. I talked to my parents all the time, but I talked to them probably two or three times a week. She talked to me three times on the phone a day FaceTime. I mean, it's it's great, it's

it's very sweet, maybe sometimes annoying. I've got a question as that, has that ever gotten in the way of your relationship? No, honestly. So when I first met Ashley's parents, it was after our first season of Paradise Together, where Ashley was very into me, and I wasn't as into Ashley at the time, at least romantically. I loved as a human being. So I was super nervous that her dad was just gonna freaking hate me and her mom think I'm the biggest jerk in the world. But they

were so welcoming, they were so sweet. I felt at home. Uh, and it it was really nice. And then it makes it even nicer now because looking back, those were my in laws the first time I met them. Um, I don't know what would have happened if I didn't get along with Ashley's parents, and I don't know what would happen if Ashley, if my parents didn't like Ashley. Do you think that Ashley's parents adoring you as much as they did right after bat played into her obsession for you?

Because you don't think it did, No, because I don't her parents didn't meet me before we film Paradise. No, but she I mean, I don't want to like, I don't want to speak for anyone or put words anyone's mouth, but she definitely had I'm not gonna say the word obsessed because that's maybe a little strong. She had very strong feelings for you for for three years, right after Paradise, before the next Paradise, even after that Paradise, etcetera, etcetera.

Do you think that her feelings were escalated because of how much her parents are door with you. I mean, I I don't know, but I would say that they had to have played it into it a little bit. I mean, I guess maybe played a little bit into it, like the fact that I get so you know, I get along with her dad really well, you know what, really what it really came down to, I fit so well into her family. That's I just you know how you just meet people and you vibe with them and

you feel like you fit in. That's exactly how I felt with her entire family, her parents or sister being at our house, them being East Coasters, it just felt right. And so I think that maybe played a little bit of a factor into why Ashley was so confused why we weren't together, because everything just fit, including the family dynamic. My question to you, Dean, have you ever been disliked by someone else's parents. I don't want to sound too full of myself here, but I'm pretty good when it

comes to parents. I think you are very good. You're just so likable. And but my question is not that they did like you in person, because everybody loves you once when I meet you, but with like was there like either Kalin's or even an ex's parents not like you before they met you. I would say it's never happened until Paradise the first time. For me. I can't

imagine why. I can't imagine why parents wouldn't want them dating their their daughter dating Dean from Bachelor in Paradise At that time, I was I was America's f boy for a while, and I wouldn't say it ever lets anyone disliking me, parents wise, but it definitely created, uh an extra obstacle for me to hurdle. I guess you

could say, I'm trying to think of specifics. It was like it was like whenever I met someone new, whether I was dating, let's say, let's say I was like dating Leslie or Christine or whoever I was dating post first Bachelor in Paradise, right, I was was always an upholl battle. I was always starting from like from a negative two position and having to get back to zero was like a challenge. Not a challenge, but like it took a challenge tone because people had an idea of

who you were and what you were all about. And obviously you're not that guy. You just make certain mistakes. That does suck, But uh, you know what's funny. Parents do love you to the point where after I started dating Ashley, we were boyfriend girlfriend maybe fiance's at this time. Audrey, Ashley's mom got you a gift. I don't know if you ever got it. I don't remember it might have been like suspenders or something, but she saw them thought of you bought them for you? And I was like, Audrey,

you're buying gifts for Dean. I'm your future son in law. This is bullshit. That's almost parents love. That just speaks to how great Audrey is. I would say, but no, Ashley's mother and I we've met a couple of times and she's fantastic. Uh I don't know. Yeah, she's great. I've got nothing bad to say about her. So well, you're just great with parents, man. Uh, thanks, I appreciate that. Yeah, it's it's maybe maybe because I don't have parents in my own, so I I overextend myself to h to

make other parents like me. I'm like a child of all my friends parents, you know what I mean? Can I ask one question before we bring in the guests? And this is on a little bit more of an emotional level, so please if you don't feel comfortable answering it, let me know. But do you get like, does that bother you at all? The fact that like you can't um, you know, get your parents, you know. Signature of approval. Uh well, firstly, Jared, you should know this by now.

That nothing makes me uncomfortable. Uh second, secondly, does it bother me that I can't get there? Like blessing or make you make you sad? You know? I would say, of all the things that would make me sad about not having parents, that's like the least thing that would make me sad. But I will say there are things that like not having parents kind of makes things more

convenient and easier. Whereas like let's say, let's say, you know, hypothetical world, your parents hate like despised Ashley, and because of that, like you couldn't carry on a relationship with actually because obviously you care about your parents opinion and you want to make them happy as well as make yourself happy, So there would be like some tension in the relationships somehow. Not having parents for me like I

never have to worry about my parents blessing. Like let's say I introduced my in another hypothetical world my parents to Kalin and they're like, oh, Kalin sucks, we hate her, we don't want you to Dator, but I really liked her, and I was like, well, I wanted Dat, or I would have to choose between Dat and Kalin and making my parents happy so there's like, you know, there's pros and cons, but I like, I don't have to worry about getting a blessing from my parents to date anyone.

I don't have to worry about, like, uh, certain things like that. I guess I was gonna say a holidays, you know, like there's less pressure for that kind of stuff. Uh. So that's like the Barbs. It's like the Barb scenario from Peter season, or at least the way it looked like to play it out, where Peter had to choose between Maddie and Barb. Yeah, exactly. I guess that's a different way of looking at it, but a interesting way

new to it. I mean, you always you always kind of gotta find the silver lining, you know, And I mean I would say overall, there's probably more negatives than there are positives. But I think if you just look for the positives, it's Kalen gets the seal of approval from Ashley and me, and that's all that matters. That's all I care about too. It's just you guys approving, you know. Duh. So we do have our guests that are waiting on the line, but before we talk to

Mama's boys, let's take a quick break. Welcome back to help suck at dating. We have some very special guests who are joining us right now via zoom obviously COVID from the brand new show I Love a Mama's Boy, which premieres Sunday, October at ten pm on TLC. We have Stephanie, Mike, and of course Mike's mom, Liz. Thank you so much for joining us. Guys. So because we work at my Heart, we get special treatment sometimes. And I've actually seen the first episode. Have you guys watched

anything yet? She hasn't. My mom and I have gotten to see some clips from some of the other family's got a little bit of a little bit of a preview, Not as much as we'd like to see, but yeah, we got we got a little insight. Have you guys seen anything of yourself yet? They won't show us, They won't let us see our own foot and we've been asking. I feel very special right now because I've seen tell us everything. I'm I mean, Mike, I mean, you come

off as a Mama's boy. I expected that, needless to say, but it's well, I well, I can't say anything because I don't want to. One I don't know if legally I can into I'm for you guys, but I guess. Here's here's my question. My first question Mike and Stephanie. Well, I want to ask Stephanie's first how much of a mama's boy is Mike? Mike is a major mama's boy. I'm the one that sent him into the show the second I all that I literally didn't even read passed do you know a Mom's Boy, and sent it right

over to him. I mean, these two are on the phone all day every day, and then the second we leave her house, they're on the phone the whole part right home. So she's laughing because she knows that's true. It's anyway it is, Liz, how many times a day do you talk to Mike? Um, let me say countless once because the conversation just never ends. And my god, you know what, because I always have everything to tell him. I have so much to tell him. He's like my

best friend too, you know. So yeah, it really does well, Liz. In the episode, uh, you know, we talk about you know, what happened with Mike's dad? Uh? And my um, I know it's a long time ago, but of course I'm sorry to hear that. Um, but do you think that because you were a single parent, like you became closer to Mike because of that? Yes? I Well we've always

been close. I mean since birth. I mean he was born, and it's like, you know, that's your child and they're putting too your arms and that's like your life, you know. So that's already such a strong bond to begin with. Um, and then after his father passed away, I felt almost like I had to take on two roles and um, yeah, and so yeah, maybe that it became stronger because of that.

It was always strong, but became even stronger. So I was always like the mama bear, and now I was like double I was my Yeah, Stephanie, I got a question for you. What is it like dating a mama's boy? You know, it's a lot, it's a lot to handle. At first, when I first started dating Mike, I didn't really realize the magnitude of how much of my mom

was boy he was. We moved in with each other about a year ago, and that's when it really hit because it was like I'd come home from work and I would be excited to talk to Mike and tell him about my work day and just like on find with him and like he's unwinding with his mom on the phone, and it's like I couldn't even get a word in and that's something. It's like, all right, you know, there might be some issues here trying to figure out

who the number one woman in his life. You know, me and Liz are both competitive people, so it kind of don my energy. Like here, the thing is okay that we have to talk about this stuff and I live together, right, So Steph says she wants to come home from work and you know, try to unwind. Like we also met at work, So first thing in the morning she gets to talk and just avent as much as she wants. And then throughout the course of the day. Guess what, when we're working, I see her all day

doing that too. So step also is somebody who needs a hundred percent of the attention. So I feel like that kind of gets taken out a conflict where at work? Where at work? And then when I'm done with work, I'm like, all right, so let me let's talk about life. Let's talk about you know, not work. Can you say which talk show you guys work on? Because he didn't. We are talk show. Didn't want us to say it on the show, so it's cut out. I don't know if it's it's not on this it's not on the show. Yeah,

they didn't want us our show. They wanted to show us on the show. Our show, didn't want us to be it's a very popular daytime talk show television. Yeah, you can't say it now, right because now, like my mind is, I'm like, I'm all over the place, all right, neverbody, we don't even risk don't even risk it. Yeah, we worked for the more show. Okay, okay, very well, that's fine, that's fine to say it was more for the purpose of the show. But okay, well that's you go on

our Instagram, bios or whatever. You can see that social media. That's going to get I have a million questions about that, but I will will wait for another podcast for that. Um, I want to know how Mike and stuff, how far do you live from Liz. Let's than an hour. That's a pretty long way to be like a mama's boy. It's a little too far from my taste. Okay, can

I give you guys an example? But our October has looked like so far so in the beginning of the month, we hung out with Liz, and then a week later we went to a pumpkin patch and we went to a brewery with Liz, and then this weekend we were actually invited to a dinner to go back up with Liz and the rest of the family. So I'm not sure we're gonna make it to the dinner. Yeah, I don't think we're making it to the dinner. But the endless plans and it's always endless fun to be happy.

That's not so bad. I I imagine like a mom's boy, like by big fat Greek wedding where they like, you literally live across the street from your parents. See, that's the thing though, It's like, you know, I have a mom's boy in the sense that we have a super

close relationship. We call each other and talk out a lot of big life decision into here if I need advice, But you know, in terms of everything else, I feel like that was one thing I wanted to make clear on the show was I do have a sense of independence too, And I guess the viewers will see kind of and leave it up to their discretion of how much they agree with me. But also Liz has made joking comment about living with us, cooking for us, so

it's definitely been mentioned. She's like, hey, if we get another show, maybe I can come up with you. I'm like, are in law apartments? Someday? There you go. I've got a question. So, Stephanie and Liz, have you guys ever had like an argument or anything fighting over Mike just like for his attention? Well, it's not necessarily. I feel like the arguments are more passive aggressive. The one thing that I think you'll see in the show is about um skiing. I think is something that we argue about.

I love skiing and Liz hates it and things, and I've really corrupted Mike's mind. It's becoming like a big dangerous here, not dangerous, but black diamond letter, black diamond here because of me, And that has been are like one of hard clashing points. So, but it's usually not like a you know, a blowout argument. It's more like why are you doing this? Dean? I'm sure Liz would love to hear how you broke your leg ski Don't I know the story, Dean? Please don't tell I'm begging you. Actually,

you know what's funny? Did you say that as Steff even said, Oh jeez, I feel like this might get brought up. I don't even want to bring literally talked about this the day something God forbid happen, and sad what it never does. I am moving in to take care of her. So Stephanie remember that, Mike, just be careful if you go to Switzerland, just be careful out there. That's all I gotta say. I'll be very careful to do it. I feel like that's still years out of

my level of expertise to anyway. Yeah, same same out of mind apparently too, So I don't know. I guess I'm the same level on that one. Yeah, so Mike, when because you know your quote unquote this mama's boy. I feel like bad saying that, but you know, part of the show. Uh So, you know, did you always know that your mom was always gonna have to give a seal of approval before you we're gonna marry someone. Yeah?

I did. And you know, honestly, there's been relationships in my past where I thought that there was someone that maybe could be the one, or you know, maybe I felt a little bit more serious. You know how young love is sometimes, and like there were times where my mom didn't always approve And then now looking back, once I met Steph, I was like, Okay, my mom was actually right back then about those other people in the

exerciety dated in the past. But in the back of my mind, like I always knew, like first or second date, it's like, damn, his mom gonna like her because if not, Like,

why am I wasted my time? Liz, did you have any uh, like, do you remember any instances instances where you were like Mike, no, oh yeah, every single girlfriend literally like my teenage dude, I remember when I was fifteen years old, Like it was like my first time we went over to a fair and like I remember that I had this she's literally rolling her eyes, I like walking around with like like I literally introduced her to this one girl that she got a bad impression

up and my mom just gave her the nastiest look and like completely ruined my weekend. And like that was the first time I ever really introduced her to a girlfriend, and I knew, like, damn, this is gonna be a tough look. It took me to I was twenty six and eleven years so I find when she could be cord with with. I mean, honestly, it's nice you've got this, You've got your mother serving as like a filter to kind of keep out the ones that maybe you aren't

worth your time. And obviously it worked out because you've now you've got Stephanie, right, all those yeah, those losers? Uh? But Mike, well, so knowing that your mom needed there was so much pressure with your with your mom making sure that you had the right girl, you know, with Stephanie. Did you really hold off on introducing Stephanie to your mom because you knew that there was gonna be like this wrath coming her way? You know, I'd be lying if I said that it wasn't on the back of

my mind. I did wait a little bit. Um. But at the same time, though, Steph and I were friends for like a long time before we ever even started dating or had like a romantic relationship, So my mom had already been familiar with Steph. And I actually think you guys had already maybe even net in passing before we started dating. Yes, we did meet in passing. That's different, right, And wait, how did you guys meet? Oh? Because you

worked together? Yeah, so we workedgether And then there was one time where I was out with some friends and he had taken his mom out to like the same bar restaurant that I was out at, and I was like, oh, there's Mike and his mom my mom on on the date like Friday night. Let's go say hi. And then me and my girlfriend went said hi to him and his mom. That is awesome. See how fun I was

back in my single days. I was dating my mom on Friday nights and then I ended up seeing stuff out and I was like, Yep, that's my guy right there. We did have fun. We have fun every time we go out. So, Stephanie, have you done anything specific to try to win over Liz's good graces? Like how do you? What have you done? Absolutely so, very early on if the relationship, Liz got me a cookbook, and I have been really working hard to make sure I feed her

son properly healthy meals. So I have actually changed up my whole cooking methods. So I don't know, maybe you'll see a little bit about that on the show, but I yeah, I just I'm a lot of I'm a lot more of a clean eater now because I cooked for Mike. So I want to make sure that she approves everything, because in the beginning I was kind of noticing maybe some judgment from her. I was making like mac and cheese chicken pope pie, and she was like, oh,

you know, why don't you make him a salid? And I was like, oh, so things like that that I do. Try and press her. I'll send her, I'll text her pictures of the meals I cooked. Stuff like that. They also got a lot closer. On vacation. We went to add together. Yes, we did go on vacation, three of us together prior to COVID year ago. We went where'd you guys go? We went on a cruise, on a cruise, a roll cribby in vacation too, there we go? Mom,

do we go to puert Rico? Haiti? Don't remember where else? Bermuda? Wait, So was this vacation was the purpose of this vacation for Stephanie Liz to like go grow closer or was it like a romantic getaway that Liz just crashed? No, there's a method to my madness. My mom loves cruises, Stephanie loves vacations. I connected the dots and made it happen, and then I realized that this could probably be beneficial for the future, like there was a reason for everything

I did. Mike is the king of playing book side, So for me, I thought we were going on a couple's cruise, but then all of a sudden it became this whole family affair. Step thought it was a couple of cruise, My mom thought it was a family trip, and I just said, hey, guys, we're all here. It worked out. Is there anything you guys are nervous about maybe with the show airing, anything like any reservations you

might have. You know, I feel like there's always a little bit of questions, especially you know when you don't get to see the content prior to it coming out. But I felt like I was myself as much as possible, and I felt like I'm gonna give the viewer true and we had fun with it. We had a good time. So at the end of the day, I think that's all that matters. We had a good time, and yeah, I think we showed who we are. That's great. Well,

I I haven't seen the whole season yet. I only seen the first episode, but you guys are very lovable, very sweet because it's it's you. And then there's one too. I think there's only two other mama's boys. I think yes, three yeah, four total total. Sprinkle them in differently so you never know who's gonna pop in where. Yeah, you never really do. So, Stephanie, what's the number one challenge

of dating a Mama's boy? The number one challenge of dating a mama's boy is just one wondering if and when you're ever going to come first, I guess, and just you know, wanting to be know, just wanting to be the priority and wanting to be number one. Well, let me ask you, all three of you this. Do you think there's ever going to come a time where, like Mike and stuff, you're going to have to start

living your own lives? Liz, don't kill me. Actually I think that, Oh, she's looking at about to say, actually what, I think there are possibilities for that, And I think that there's a lot of stuff, a lot of interesting stuff coming up in the near future everyone's gonna have to tune in for. Are you gonna propose like right now and help us like a dating because that's awesome. I wouldn't be on this podcast if I was this mook. Liz, Liz,

what do you What do you feel about that? Because obviously, Liz, you grew up, you were dating other people, you were married, you were married twice, if I if I remember correctly, UM, and so did you have a similar experience with your parents or UM with my parents. I'm very close to my family big you know, big family are at least close together. And Michael was race like that since he

was little. I'm very close to him. And UM, you know, if even if they I think they're going to plan on living their own lives, I'm still gonna be always involved. I am, I'll be you know, my mother in law grandma like and you know what I've you know what I've realized to you'd rather have this than a parent

or a grandparent who doesn't want to be involved. You know that makes sense, That's what my because my my mother in law, I certainly don't want to say she's pressuring us to have kids, but she mentions it a lot. And but I I and she says this, and I say this too. I'd rather have, you know, a mother in law who who wants us to have kids and someone who doesn't really care. So I think it's a good thing. Was I think you're doing a great thing.

Maybe a little too much, but you know, like three times when I might have to bite my tongue and not say something, and I'm working on that. So you're getting better, little hey, We're all just trying to get a little better, especially on this podcast. That's the whole point we end every podcast with. Well, make sure you tune in next week where hopefully we just suck a little bit less. You guys are doing all right since the show started. I've watched your stories and seeing how

it's come about, and you guys definitely don't suck anymore. Yeah. That's been a big fan and she's made me a big fan as well, So we appreciate it. Thanks, guys, I appreciate it. We owe it all to the podcast. Yeah, but we we absolutely appreciate it. Yeah, yeah, it wasn't. I mean both of us formed relationships after this doing this podcast. So really we just have to credit stuck Army who, which is what we call our listeners. So who are the best people of all time? Um? Well,

I just really want to thank you guys for coming on. Stephanie, Mike, Liz, you guys are the best. I'm super excited for you. You should be super excited. Uh, you guys have very exciting times ahead of you, So everybody who's listening out here, make sure you tune in too. I Love a MoMA's Boy, which again premieres on t l C Sunday, October at ten pm Eastern Standard time. Thank you for joining us, and then, uh, Stephanie, Mike Liz, is there any social

handles where people can follow you at? Yeah, you can follow me on my Instagram It's at step Wrestler, and I also have a TikTok where you can follow me there too. It's at Steff Ross and you can follow me on all platforms at Mike Bourn M I K E, b O r M. Question of the day, Liz Liz, what do you got for us? Yes? What I don't? I don't have what I don't have social media? Facebook on Facebook? Nothing really? Oh my mom is obsessed with Facebook.

I wish you would get constant family arguments on that thing. It's terrible. So I don't want an arguments, so that's why I have to stay away from that. You're doing a great job. Then, Uh, Stephanie, Mike Liz, thank you so much for coming on. You guys are awesome. Ye, welcome back to help I suck at dating. My two favorite segments are coming up. One emails, because you guys are obviously the best thing. We love you all. But second one, we've been doing it lately. I have fun

with it. I like everybody guessing. It's it's dating terms, everybody. We should have like a little sound effect for this Easton, like dating terms do doo doo do dooo do anyway? Uh So we have Eastern, we have Mark, we have Becky, we have Dean. Everybody's going to be given their guesses and we want you guys to be guessing at home as well. So the first dating term we're learning today it's called freckling. Freckling, Ladies and gentlemen, what do you

think it is? Freckling? Freckling? Uh, freckling. Let's break this down with the Latin root of freck Uh. I don't know. I want to say. What's let's let's think about, like what fracking is? Is it really to fracking? All? This guy's been watching too many debates. Freckling, someone else go first? Okay, I'll go first. Um, it's a react, So freckles I believe to be a reaction to win the sun. You get too much fun to you get freckles. So I think it's a reaction to too much attention from your partner.

You tend to bristle at that, and if you get too much attention from them, you start freckling and pushing them away freckling. I'm all right, I'll take a step at it. I think that freckling is actually just to

play off of heckling. And uh, the reason it's called freckling is because it's it's like friendly heckling, and so that the reason people freckle is like you're dating someone, but then you start treating them like they're one of your friends, like you friendly heck all your friends all the time, like you you know, it's like crap talking on them. Um, So that's what freckling is, in my opinion, is you're you're treating your romantic partner too much like

a friend and they don't like it and they're being freckled. Dean, you put so much thought into it that was so great, completely wrong, but so great. And Becky, you guys got guesses at all. This one's hard. I don't I don't know. I mean, I'm going to completely take a different turn. And I'm gonna say, like, freckling is like another type of freckles are like usually just like kind of like all of your face. So it's like when someone like butterfly kisses or another type or it's like they just

like kiss all over your face. Okay, Betty, I thought you were going in a different direction, and I wanted to remind you that we are a PG podcast. Alright, So freckling ladies and gentlemen. Dude, Mark didn't hit it on the head, but it was very close. Freckling is when someone pops into your dating life when the weather is nice and then they vanish once it's a little chillier, just like freckles. Summer love, great summer love. Right there.

I think mine was pretty close to But yeah, I think we'll get that one to mar not even right at all. I pleased to find freckles, so that's all I was able to do. But you are still the only one to do it. All right, let's do Let's do gats being gats being. Oh, I know what gats being is. I'll go first because I know what it is.

What is it? Well, I'm just guessing. I think gats being is, and and you see people guilty of this all the time, is they pretend to be much more rich and affluent than they really as they put on this great big show, like a Gatsby show. They uh you know, especially like on Instagram, you're like post in front of like nice cars, you wear nice clothes, and then when you go on a date, you maybe like take them on like a nice first day to a fancy restaurant. But that's not really who they actually are.

So that's what gats being is, is they're pretending to be some super affluent person even though they're not, yeah, or or early on a relationship, to shout ring them with gifts whether or not they can afford them or not, to give a false impression. I yeah, I agree. See, I think it's like when you you pred I mean it's similar. My thing is similar. It's when you pretend you've read a book that you didn't actually read. Uh Like, like now I'm going to pretend to know what happens

in The Great gats To it. I don't actually, so I'm just gonna I'm gat I'm pretending back A Yeah, I think just the same thing. Like they're just completely having this whole persona that's not even them, like, it's just it's it's a facade for sure. Well it definitely is meant to be like a facade. But gats being is when you post a video picture selfly to public social media, purely and solely for a love interest to

see it, you are gats being them. So you just post a really nice picture of yourself and you're doing it because you want your love interest to see it. Like a thirst trap. It's exactly like a thirst trip. I was trying to very targeted, but yeah, they yeah, I actually I definitely percent did this when I was still trying to win Ashley over. I was I I

posted a picture. I was definitely gats being her. I posted solely for her to see it because I was like, I think she's gonna love this and she's gonna think of me all night after seeing this. Uh yeah, yeah, it's the one of me. Uh it's back there. I don't know if you'll find it, but it's me like looking into the camera fiercely and I think I have

like a blue button down on. But I remember I took it myself, like I built this tripod of boxes and put the camera on top and took a picture of it, and it's like, it's not even that good of a picture, But at the time I thought it was great. Last one because that's October, it's Halloween. I don't think we did this one, but we'll do like a halloween ish dating term. Exo skelet tending exo skeleton ng. Easton's got it right there. That is that is that's me.

I was digging forward. I couldn't find it. I have all these screenshot and love it. That better be the background. We're gonna get no listens if that's the click pait Alright, I got it. Exo skeletoning, it's putting. It's just yours. You have a ship, you you have your walls up. You've got a shell you've built up over the earth because you've been hurt so many times, and you you have trouble letting anybody in because you're exo skeletoning. Okay, interesting,

I'm gonna say. Exo skeleton NG is when you have a weird obsession with insects like ants and other bugs that also have exo skeletons, and you always bring those insects with you on the dates. And it creeps the other person out. That's exo skeleton. Is there something you want to admit to us, like a weird fetish you have? I think answer the coolest. See, I think exo skeleton. Humans do not have an exo skeleton, so if we were to use one, it would be an artificial piece

of technology. So I think it's when someone uses social media or their phones or something to make themselves, to give themselves abilities they wouldn't naturally have to make themselves appear better. Huh okay, yeah, that's a great name. I don't have anything for this, like alright, exo skeleton ng is uh. It's defined as ever heard from your partners X via Instagram or Twitter. You are not the only one. More than a fifth of us have been through this.

The term has been named exo skeleton y, perhaps referring to finding one of your dates skeletons popping out of the social media closet. So it's when an ex of the person you're dating reaches out to you directly. Yeah, that's exo skeleton right there. So like we we don't like exo skeleton. We don't like that at all. Why

would someone exo skeleton I don't understand. Well, I think it's a term to say that your ex maybe you're the ex reaching out to the new, like the new your your ex boyfriend's new lady, you know what I mean. Then you're exo skeleting your ex boyfriend. Does that make sense? No, I still don't understand. Really, it would be like Leslie reaching out to Caitlin. Leslie would be exo skeleton ng you. Why would Leslie do that because she hates him? No,

I don't know. I've had that happened to me before. Okay, so this girl reached out to me to say that my current boyfriend at the time was like a cheater and he treated her so bad about like a warning. So that's one reason why it didn't. This just happened to Janna and Mike too. She came on the podcast and talked about one of Mike's ex is reaching out to her saying some shady stuff. It was a random, It was a random, was a random on Instagram. Okay, got it, got it, got it. But that would be

an example. I'm not saying that person was right. I'm just saying that's an example. Anyway, Let's get to emails. Let's let's get an email in here before we'd sign off. All right, let's do it. Here we go. This is from anonymous. So I have one close friend left from childhood and it's a guy. I'm a girl, and if I'm being perfectly honest, I used to have a giant crush on him in high school. We've remained friends that

have never been physical. He started getting a girl a few years ago, and she and I have become extremely close. We talked every day. I consider her one of my best friends. About six months ago, she called me crying because he told her he wants an open relationship where they could introduce other people into the bedroom, and she was not okay with that. Last week, he texted me telling me we should become even better friends and would be if I was involved with them in an erotic way.

I told him that she wouldn't be okay with even when he suggested that do I tell her? He said that how do I be loyal to everyone? Here? What Trump's childhood friend or girlfriend? Uh? This is weird? Yeah, this is kind of weird. I think you just got to choose which person you want as your friend, which

which friendship you value more? I I do want to say, I commend the guy for being honest and communicating his desire or intention, but I will say it's kind of messed up that it sounds like it wasn't received well and he still wanted to pursue anyways, which is not very cool. I would say, tell your girlfriend what's going on. That's that's what my first instinct tells me, and that's what I think you should. Hundred percent. You should tell the girl because like she already made it known she's

not okay with it. And then he texts you saying that we'd be better friends if we're involved in an erotic way. It sounds like he's manipulating her. I think you're both exactly right. And I also think there's a girl code element here. The girl always comes first when you're a girl in bro code. Girl code gotta go with the girl. But also, why wouldn't you are you?

Do you not want to upset the guy because you still have these feelings for him, because I feel like his desire to have open relationships would kill those feelings. You don't want to date him, right? Is that why you're not telling him? Because you kind of want to date him because you shouldn't because it's all weird. But if unless you're really open to open relationships, and if you are, fine, but I still think you tell the girl.

The only way this works is all three of them are okay with it and they move forward on the same page. But it's obviously not that that's not the case, because one of the girls called her best friend crying because she doesn't want this. So like I I'm I'm sketched out by the guy because I'm sure the girl told the guy I don't want to do this, and then he still texted Anonymous saying, I think we'd be better friends if we were all involved in a erotic

in an erotic way. That sounds sketch central right there. I would I agree with Mark tell the girl. I think. I think the important thing with this too is we've talked. I think we've talked about this on the podcast before. But it goes beyond just being okay with the idea

of being in a relationship open relationship. I think everyone kind of has to want to be an one because if one person, let's let's say this girl is down to do it, but she's just doing it because she wants the guy to be happy, then it's still is that's not a good situation either, Like everyone should want to do it, not one person wants to do it and the other person just goes along with it, you know what I mean. So I agree, I think that

it should be a girl code. I think that she should tell her girlfriend because it also sounds like he's kind of going behind her back. And yeah, like Mark said, you probably don't want to be dating this guy anyways. So to me, by the way, that's a arm of cheating. When you're in a relationship and you're texting another girl to say I'd like you in the bedroom with me and my girlfriend, that's cheating, especially when the girlfriend is

not okay with it. Yeah, yeah, that's absolutely cheating. I think we're all on the same page on this one. Fellas mixed up. We have Hailey Marie. My boyfriend and I have been together for a few months now and it's gotten really serious. He's met my whole family. We spent almost all of our time together and nearly every night. This relationship is the healthiest either of us has ever been in. We make each other so happy. Here's the problem. I'm fully in love with him, but I don't want

to say it first and scare him off. We talk about the future and moving in together frequently, and the way he looks at me and speaks to me makes me think he really does love me. We're potentially going to have to start doing long distance soon, and I'm worried he isn't saying it in case long distance doesn't work out well. My advice to him would be, you can't predict the future, so don't dictate your actions now by assuming something could or could not work out in

the future. Uh. And then, Haley, I know your hesitations. It sucks being the first person to say you love someone, But just go on out on a limb and do it, because you're always gonna wonder what if if you don't say something, and then he doesn't say something, and then he moves away and it doesn't work out. Just put yourself out there. I remember the first person I ever told I love them was my ex girlfriend. I was nineteen at the time. We were dating for about four months,

and I was super nervous. I didn't know the first time I ever told someone I love them, I didn't know if they were going to reciprocate it, and so I said, I love you, and then she said I think I'm falling in love with you. And I was like, Okay,

that's pretty good. I think that's not bad. Uh. And then it was really sweet because then a couple of months later she was like, I just wasn't ready, you know, and she explained it at the time, but she was like, I just wasn't ready to say, and now I'm ready to say that I am completely in love with you. So it was a really nice moment. Scary for a second because I was like, I think this is good, but there's like a thirty percent chance that it's not good.

But it's hard putting yourself out there. I totally understand where you're coming from, but you got it to it. I agree. I think that if you feel some way about someone, there's no better time than the present to let them know how you feel. And it's like, well, if you wait a little bit longer to tell him, what's that going to accomplish? Probably nothing, especially if you guys are going a long distance, like you definitely want

your feelings to be known. I think there really are no negatives to telling him sooner rather than later, especially if you're certain you feel that way. Like, I think the only negative would be a rushing your like decision of feeling that way and then like saying it and then actually not meaning it. But if you are certain that you do feel that way, tell him, and like, let's say he responds to it negatively for whatever reason, Uh, then it just wasn't supposed to be your person. But

I would be surprised if you respond negatively. You know, it sounds like you guys, Like you said, you spend every day together. You guys have met each other's parents. Um. Yeah, I think there's really no negatives to actually expressing how you feel, especially when you're certain that way too. Tell him. He may not respond right away, and you have to be okay with that because he may not be ready. He may be scared. Guys are scared of commitment, all

that stuff. But tell them if this relationship is what you think it is, then tell them it's going to be fine. Guys were like the Three Wise Men or or the three Stooges. There's like a gray area between those two, and I think we kind of like live in there. Yeah, I think we're wise. I think we just gave some of them our best advice. I know we say this every time we give advice, and that was the best advice we've ever given. But that might

have been the best advice. I totally agree. But Anonymous and Haley take our advice with a great install because you guys know better than us, but like still listen to us a little bit kind of anyway, Thank you so much for joining us this week and help I suck at dating. We love you all who listen. Thank you so much to Stephanie, Mike and Mom Liz of course from I Love a Mama's Boy, which premieres Sunday at ten pm Eastern Standard Time on t l C.

Thank you to everybody who emailed in Haley. I want to say her last name was Marie Hailey, Marie and Anonymous, thank you so much for your emails. We really appreciate it. Thank you to everyone listened to this podcast, including uh, well that's about it, including you and including you La prison listening to this right now. Thank you. I wish we could reach out and uh stay six ft apart and and and give you I don't know, you can't like a six foot hug. No, no, no, no, shaking hands.

No huggings right now, but like one of those today, Did I say huggings? Yeah, one of those huggings anyway? Is that is that a diver break? I think the longer we dropped this out, the worst we're gonna start sounding late. Thanks everyone, be sure to tune next week. We've got a great episode for you. We got some of the contestants, the winners from Love Island will be joining us and you don't want to miss that, So be sure to tune next week, where maybe we will

suck just a little bit less. Follow help by Suck at Dating on I Heart Radio or wherever you listen to podcast