It Has a Nice Ring to It with Caelynn Miller-Keyes

proposal that happened. I'm Annapollo host in Hawaii. UM. We have a very special episode for you today because not only are we recording live from the Galapagos Islands very close towards Charles Darwin conducted much of his research, but we have an incredibly special guest co host with us this week, the podcast host herself new podcast, True Crime Reality Right True Crime Reality Podcast with Eyeart Radio. Kaylan Miller Keys is joining us this week. Thank you so

much for having me again. Thank you for letting us have you again. I feel like last week was the alternative fact version of the engagement, and this week we're actually getting the truth of what has happened when Dean got down on one knee after he dragged Klin through an eleven mile hike near death experience just to get a ring on her finger and not even the ring he initially bought her, but one that he gave her after he lost it, the actual ring. Yeah, that was

a good recap and exactly how I felt. I tried so calin. Yeah, I'm gonna let you guys pretty much like to. I have some questions, Amy, our producer has some questions, but I want to hear from you guys first. So Dean, why don't you ask Klin your questions of you know how it felt for her when this whole journey began. Was I supposed to have questions prepared? Now you guys are just talking. I feel like it's better

if you just talk rather than me insert my question. So, like, start from the beginning, Kalin, did you have any idea that he was going to propose to you this weekend? Well? I yeah, I do want to say. So, you guys have already heard my story. So I'm just gonna hand the microphone over to her and let her just go.

And it's good. That's a rare thing. I originally thought he was going to propose in Hawaii because we were talking about when we were both proposing, and he was like, well, my dates aren't flexible, and I was like, oh, it's got to be Hawaii. But then he lost the ring and I was like, I guess he's not proposing. So that really threw me for a loop. And all my friends thought he was doing that to throw me off,

but he didn't. He actually lost the ring, but he did propose with a beautiful ring that I have on my finger now that he won't let me show anyone. All that to say I did not know he was proposing. He definitely threw me off. Oh you just said you didn't know that because you lost the ring, then I thought you weren't proposing. I gotta say something. Let interject.

I think she is being very nice by saying that she had no idea that it was coming, because I secretly think she had every like understanding that it was coming. She got her nails done the day before we left. I get my nails done every two weeks. I never don't have my nails done. And I got them painted dirt color. I specifically got them painted the color of dirt because whenever I get my nails done and they were camping, I get dirt in them. Why would I paint my nails dirt colored if I knew I was

getting engaged. Why would you paint your nails their colored at any moment in time. I like the color that you have. Actually, by the way, um, oh what's here? Uh? There was something else that you did that made me suspicious of your knowledge. I can't remember what it is though. Uh, I'm not going to be able to remember thinking about something else that you did. And I was like, that's a little fishy. Yeah, sorry, I didn't mean to. I'm trying to think. I'm trying to remember what it is,

all right, anyway, So then back to Kaylin here. So we got to Hawaii. We camped one night in Hawaii on a public beach and Klin hated it. She didn't feel safe. But at the end of the day we were safe. Right, Yes, we were safe. But when you're camping, there's usually so many other people camping around you, and I think a big mistake Dina and I made, um, at least for myself. We listened to this crime Junkies podcast that was specifically about murders happening while people are

camping in national parks, which gave me anxiety. Uh, and it still sticks with me. So at least, like when you're camping there are other campers around, if something's going to happen, like could happen to someone else, But we were the only campers, the only people intents on this beach. So then I was like, if something happens, like, we're the only target here. And that's what I thought about, as cars are driving up and doing sketchy things at two a m. That would be like watching Jaws as

you were walking into the ocean exactly here. Here's what I gotta say about Kalin's logic based off the fact that there were no campers around us. If you're driving your car down the freeway, are you more likely to get into an accident if there's a bunch of other cars around or if you're the only car on the freeway.

I'm just saying the possibility for friction is a lot higher when there's a lot of people around, Like if there's no one around us, I see where you're coming from, and I'm not trying to like diminish your feelings in that sense. And it was a little sketchy because we there was no marked campsites. I had never camped on the beach in Hawaii before, so I don't really know

what I was doing um. But anyways, all this to say is that the proposal trip got off to a bit of a rocky start because hotels isn't quite are expensive and we were going to start the hike early the next day and we got in late that night, and so I was like, well, why don't I just book this campsite for us for three dollars and then I'll get us a nice hotel on the back side of the trip after the proposal has already happened. So also, UM,

I think the mistake I make in camping or hiking. UM. For this, I started to google the campsite and people were saying that it was dangerous and that they didn't feel safe there. So then that added to my not feeling safe. And also in that regard for the hike, I did no prior research, and I told Dean from now on, for the rest of our lives, I will not blindly agree to any hike. I'm going to research it.

Because I started to research a week before we left, and it's one of the most dangerous hikes in America. I had no idea, and I probably wouldn't agree if I agreed if I knew that. So I think my downfall is Google in any of these situations with team or it's Europe just because it's the most dangerous, because yeah, you know, I don't think you researching a very dangerous one of the most dangerous hikes in the world would be considered your downfall. I would consider that your upfall.

Just because it's the most dangerous hike, and I'm eric cut doesn't make it dangerous though, you know what I mean, It's still at the end of the day, it's still a hike, and a hike just requires you to put one ft in front of the other until you end up at the camp site. I'm not saying it was easy, but I'm saying like, just because it's the most of something doesn't necessarily make it a bad thing. You know

that makes sense. That was pretty eloquent. I would say, um, And in fact, okay, I'll hand it back to Kaylin. So do you want to talk about the hike a little bit. Yeah, So the hike began, and also the day before we left, we flew to Bozeman to see Dean's brother and pick up some camera equipment, and Dean's brother told me, like, it's pretty sketchy, it's pretty scary, and and his brother is so good at hiking rock climbing,

like he's pretty fearless in my eyes. So for him to say it's a little scary for him, to say it's really difficult or a little difficult, but a little difficult for him, is like super difficult for me. And another thing he said was one mile feels a lot longer than one mile. And I'm really glad he said that because that helped me through the hike, because it's true. One mile we started and I was like we had

to have gone like five miles. We had gone maybe one and a half miles, maybe two, And that's how the whole hike felt. It was so long, it was so difficult. It was like one of the worst hikes

I've ever done in my life. Um So, I was like, in my head, I was telling myself we should get to the end camp site, which is eleven miles, but I knew that we had a backup which was six miles in, and once we were only two miles in, I was like, there's no chance that I could possibly make it eleven miles when these miles just feel so long, and mismarked, um so thankfully We camped at the six Mile camp site and that was nice. We met a friend there who lives there and what's his name, Don

rich Um, And yeah, it was nice. We eat mashed potatoes. Dean. I don't mind dehydrated meals, but Dean didn't want to do that, and I don't know if that was part of the romance. Aspect was I was trying to make us eat good, healthy, real meals, and he did a really good job. Like the meals are great. We weren't eating um hydrated our freeze, dried pat tie. It was really good. It was good. Granted, those meals are delicious, but they just messed with your stomach so much. We

hiked in vegetables. I cut up onions, potatoes, carrots, pepper, sausage, and oh gosh, I'm just so great, aren't Do you have any more questions? Um? Well, it's funny that you say all these things, and I'm not saying they're not true, but I do want to point out that every time I go on a big hike or a big adventure, Caitlin is like, are you excited? And I always say, no, I'm not excited. I'm going to be miserable. For the next However, many days I'm going to be hiking and

I'm gonna be exhausted and I'm just gonna suck. Blah blah blah. And that's exactly what I told her when we were hiking into Poli. As we were starting, she was like, are you excited? I was like, no, this is gonna suck. And she agreed it sucked. But what the only reason that it's fun to do these things and um, and what Kalin can attest to is after the fact, we look back at it with such fond memories of the experience. It's hard to look back on

the experience engagement aside. If we didn't get engaged on the trip, we would still look back and be like, Wow, that was an awesome trip. Do you disagree? You agree? So she agrees, and that's that's the case with all that stuff. So although it was kind of miserable in the moment looking back, proposal or not, it was still a very magical experience. I do agree with what you're saying.

But also, Dean is a is it type one or type two fun m Dean's a type two fun guy where he doesn't enjoyed in the moment, but he enjoys it after. In the story that he gets to tell I'm a type one fun person. I like to have fun in the moment and enjoy every aspect of the fun I'm having. Um So for him it's it's more fun. It was fun for me, but more enjoyable for him. The only reason it's more enjoyable for someone like me

and like this. The only reason something like this is more enjoyable for someone like me is because I've done it more often and I'm more capable of doing it. So it's like I suffer less during it, and I still get to feel as much joy after the fact, like you did a great job. I want to give Kilin all the credit in the world, because that was a hard hike. Twenty two miles on the Napoly Coast

is very challenging, and Klin was an absolute beast. We got to the beach and I proposed, and then the next day we were trying to navigate how Calin was going to get off the beach and we could have gotten an emergency helicopter would it costs a thousand dollars? And then calind how to go to the hospital with an injury quote unquote, and she was like, no, I don't want to do that. It's embarrassing. And I was like, okay, well, then the only other option is for you to hike out.

And she was so anti hiking out, but then the second we started hiking out, she was faster, stronger, braver than I've ever seen her in my entire life. And she crushed the hike out in spades, and it was very impressive. You're welcome, and you would you agree, like it's so we did have a SUPERI hike which is ten miles and ten miles out, and on that hike it's a lot more easy to get a helicopter out, so Calin flew out of that one. And I think that one is a little different because you actually were

like in more pain on that one. But if you don't have an option of like just getting a free ride out, you were very capable and you crushed the hike out. It was very impressive, you know, as Dean can attest to sometimes, as guys, we just have horrible thoughts, you know, like just like things that enter our brain. And I have moments from like I can't believe I thought that how horrible human, I am, and I gotta

be honest. When hearing this story, there's something in my head that goes, I think Dean went on this trip to die because here's something. Well, I'm because, so Dean has always said he never wanted to propose. Obviously, I'm joking. Let me preface that before we get hate. He wanted to propose, But like, in the back of my head, I'm like, wait a minute, so telling me that Dean has always said he's never wanted to propose. Never, So here he is in a moment where he has to propose.

He doesn't want to. So I mean he wants to obviously, but now I'm just like creating this story in my head. Then he goes on this He picks the most dangerous hike, hoping that you guys just fall off like Romeo and Juliet and died died together. Before he has to propose, he creates all these wonderful meals. One could say maybe it was his last meals and he wanted to make

sure that they were as delicious as possible. He picks the worst possible and then finally gets this extraordinary beach and was like, all right, well we survived so now I have to propose, right, It's like passing through the gauntlet. Once you get to the other side of the gauntlet, you know that whatever you had planned to do at the end has to happen now because you've you've completed all of the trials in front of you and now here you are. It is funny too. I think I

talked about this on last week's episode. How we we talked about last week on the episode. I think about how Caitlin and I wanted to propose to each other and she's now it was me a proposal, thank you

very much. I'm waiting, and how I was thinking about if I should give her the proposal that she would deem as her perfect proposal, or should I do it this way, which is kind of more my thing, you know, like instead of going to the Italian countryside and proposing out there, which sounds pretty lovely, Don't get me wrong, I was kind of doing it my own way, and so now I'm excited to see how she does it because I imagine she's going to do it her own way. Well,

that's the thing. I had it planned like perfectly for him originally, and now my plans are shifting because I'm like, if this was all about him and what he likes, yeah, you proposal the year was all about no, no, no, all the things that you enjoy. I was like, well, maybe I should do a proposal of the things that I enjoy. So I'm not sure I did enjoy it and you'll still enjoy a proposal for you, Absolutely I will, but it maybe won't be as adventures as I was

originally thinking it would be. Can I hear what your original please? It could still happen. I just want to hear it. But if you say it out loud then you can Maybe then you can put it to bed and you can do the other idea that you have. I can tell you the one that I was the first thought in my mind before I realized it would have been like fourteen dollars. I was going to have propose to you on a zero gravity flight. I know,

but it's fourteen dollars. So and if the price keeps going up, it goes up a thousand dollars every year, So that's not happening. I thought it was like thirty dollars. For that it's like or maybe it's now sixteen. I think it's eight per person. Oh really, it's actually not as bad as I thought, because I know Nick did that on his season of The Bachelor with Vanessa, and I was talking to one of the executive producers of

The Bachelor. I can't remember when, and I was like, I can't, I don't know, I don't I don't think I was angry, but I was like, you guys took Nick on the zero gravity flight, Like, what do I have to do to get on that flight? Next time? I want to go on that date. I don't care who it's with. I don't care what happens. I want to be on a zero gravity airplane. Um. So that would have been a nice proposal. But since we started dating,

you have talked about that. It's three and a half years and so I thought that would be the perfect proposal for you, But unfortunately I don't have that kind of money. It's just it's pretty cool to think about. You would literally be one of maybe, like a thought, well, they probably do them a lot nowadays, one of a few thousand people in the history of human existence to experience zero gravity. That's pretty sweet. That's worth the price tag, in my opinion, I accept. I'll marry you let's go

on his zero gravity flight. Kalen, did you when did you finally start believing that Dean would propose to you? I can't imagine when you first started dating Dean that he you thought going to the relationship that this could potentially end in marriage, because if everything that Dean was doing at the time of his life living in a van didn't know if he wanted to get married, kind of settled down. So when did you finally realize I think he is down for proposing to me and getting married.

I don't know what the moment was, but I do agree. I think we both went into this relationship not expecting it to last long um like nevertheless end in marriage. But I think we just had so many conversations and like talked about I don't know if it was like year one or year two, and we were like, okay, this is we're like into this relationship. I don't know if you know, and it was, but I think we just had so many conversations that eventually we were like, oh,

we could do this. But I don't know like what moment it was. I think it was just early on I put the ring on, we got a cellphone plan, together, we joined our bank accounts together, we got a dog together, we bought a house together. That's true. We did all the steps that married people do. So I think we already felt married, and then we had a lot of conversations on like should we should we not? And Dean didn't want to and then warmed up to the idea.

For me, it's just like I had already made the decision that I was going to spend my life with you, So it's like, fine, if you want to get married, let's just get married. But then people turn that into a headline. Fine, let's get married. You're excited to get married. I'm excited spen the rest of my life with you. Marriage doesn't excite me as much as that. That's fair, That's right. Yeah, So I know. We also have some questions from our producer Amy uh that I wanted to

invite on here. She prerecorded them. So let's hear our first question from our producer Amy Sugarman, who without this podcast would not be possible, So thank you Amy. She has some questions for you guys. Amy, what's your first question? If Calyn wants all your passwords and pass codes, will you be okay with that it sounds like this question is directed to me. Calin already has all my pass codes to everything, and I have hers to everything as well,

and the pass codes are I'm just kidding. I'm not going to share the pass codes, but yeah, it's pretty we have each have like three variations of the same pass code. I probably shouldn't have said that, but but we know we know each other's passwords to everything. So and that kind of started early on too, maybe like you're one in our relationship, we've always just had trust, which has been nice and like transparency. Yeah, that's true.

I think it happened day one for me. I didn't give a crap, but we started sharing our location our first like two weeks into dating. Yeah right, Yeah, I guess I'm just saying I've never I've never had anything to hide and either of you. So it's very early on that we just did that, which is nice. Dean. Once you have children, if Kaylin decides she doesn't want you jumping out of airplanes and doing dangerous things, are you willing to stop for the sake of the family. Hmm,

I guess this one is directed to me again as well. Um, what I stopped for the sake of family. Oh crap, sorry, we're having some audio issues here. I'm just gonna put this down. Um, what I stopped for the sake of family? Hell? No, I'm gonna do whatever I want, whenever I want, and no one's gonna stop me. Um, I don't know. I'm

just gonna answer, and not for you. But but Dean's brother now has a child, and Dean and him went on a hike, and Dean chose the option to do like the more dangerous for vision of the hike, and Brad, his brother, because now he's a dad, opted for the safer version of the hike. And I can see Dean maybe being similar, Like he's still going to do the things that he loves, but you've given the option between like easy versus uh, death defying, maybe he'll choose the

easier part. For the record, I don't think that Brad shows the easier route because he's a father. I think he chose that route because he's lazy and he was scared of the more challenging route, which me being the non lazy, fearless person that I am, and I didn't really know what I was doing until I was already halfway through it, and at that point it was too late to turn around anyways. But I see what you're saying,

it's possible. I don't think skydiving really is all that dangerous. Yes, you can die skydiving, but you can die doing a plethora of other things, um, the things I do while exhilarating. I don't think our tip particularly very dangerous. I was gonna say, I don't think skydiving is necessarily something you need to give up if your dad, but maybe like free soloing. I also haven't jumped out of an airplane in a year, so I kind of have already given

up skydiving. My main Scott having friend moved to Miami, and now I have no friends to sky dive with. Although John Hershey I think it is his last name, Katie's ex boyfriend, is a skydiver and we've never met in person, but we flirt all the time on Instagram and I want him to be any skydiving buddy, so we'll see about that. Um. I've never free sold anything, except for I guess in Montana at one time when

I almost died. But to summarize this whole conversation, UH, it might not ever matter because we might not ever have kids. If we do have kids, I would probably he's up a little bit, sure, but that's just because I'll be old and lay. Yeah. I think that Dean, you'll definitely ease up. And I also think you guys will definitely have kids because for the past however many years I've known this guy. Oh, I'm not gonna get engaged.

I'm not gonna ever buy a house. I'm not gonna settle down, I'm not gonna get married, And here he is now. Now the thing is, we're not sure if we're gonna have kids. I don't I you guys are having kids, But I do think that you will tame it down because when you have a kid, and I can speak from experience, you start thinking about death a lot more, even because you think it's not about you dying anymore. It's about your child being without their parents.

And that's what I think about a lot, because I'm like, it's not so much me dying. It's like, holy shit, if I die, this thing that I love so much won't grow up without one of his parents, and I'm like, holy shit, that's more heavy. So that's when I think about I'm sure you guys will think about as well, Like literally, right before you jump out of the plane, Dean, You're like, here we go, and then you'll be like, oh shit, oh no, they could all right, never mind, guys,

you guys go, I'm gonna wait till the plane lands. Um. I will say, one of the biggest roadblocks for me every wanting to have kids has always been just financial stability. So, uh, one of these days, maybe when help I Suck a dating podcast turns into like a spinoff reality TV show, we signed on to like a three year movie deal, and the finances just become a little bit more solid than the child could be a lot more realistic. Um, I don't. Kalin is back and forth on having kids too.

We definitely are open steady of adopting a kid. I used to be like in a Big Brother program where I at once a month, once a week, I can't remember how often was would hang out with this young boy a j and even that seemed like a lot of work. Once a week to hang out with a guy, and he was like a twelve year old kid, and I was like trying to give you were also in your twenties, partying and living like a selfish lifestyle, as

you should in that a stage of your life. Yeah, that's another thing too, is I love living a selfish lifestyle. I love to be able to just travel to Pakistan, go to Antarctica for a month if I want to what's baby, what's baby Hunter gonna do? I'm gonna take Hunter with me. I could take under it with me. Actually, pretty baby his name or that'd be pretty sweet. Yeah, that's gonna be the boy's name if we have a boy. Wait,

are you serious? Yes? Hunter Scott Bell. Well, that's amazing if I love that name Hunter, and if you guys are serious about that, that's so cool that you guys already have. Yeah, this guy. I don't know if we're gonna have kids, but if we do, his name is gonna be Hunter. Well, in fairness, In fairness, I've had that name picked out since I was like twelve. So and then if we have a girl, it'd beat Debbie cal picks the middle name Bell. And if we have a third child, then cal can start. Oh I thought

it would be Scott at the bird. Uh yeah, Michael Scott. No, I've had those names picked out ever since I was a wee little lad and I don't think you've ever had names picked out, So, just because of that timeline alone, my name's take President. Okay, But I know people are going to come up to you for that, so I think you should explain the importance of the names. Oh, I don't care if you'll come after me, and I'll explain the names if and when we get to that

point in life. But those are the names Hunter, Scott, Bell, and Debbie. Calin picks the name Bell. Yeah, And it's tricky because Debbie is an older name, and so it's hard to imagine like a young girl, a young seven year old girl, being called Deborah. We not Debora. But I have a friend named Debbie and she's very cool Debbie, So that's kind of like opened her eyes too cool. Debbie's right. As long as she's a cool Debbie, she'll be fine. But yeah, that's where we're at now, Klin.

If there was one thing, one behavior the Dean could change before your wedding day, what is it? M Um? So many to choose from you can only pick one? Um, Okay, and we've had this conversation many times. I like to be very punctual. My mom was always late when I was growing up, so I really try to be on time too. Things are early. Dean doesn't have that same sense of urgency, so if he could just be on time to our wedding, that would be ideal. Sure, easy enough.

I can I share my retort last time you shared this? Okay, I won't. You're welcome, So there you go, punctuality. I'll work on it for you, babe. I really want Russell Wilson to officiate your wedding, and so when everybody sits down, he's like Bronco's Country Let's Ride, Let's rad. That's funny that you mentioned that, because the guy that I want to officiate it is literally Russell Wilson's twin. He gets stopped all the time. People ask him if he's Russell Wilson.

Oh my god, and he has to do it Broncos Country Let's Ride. I can't believe he's still I cannot believe he still does that Broncos Country Let's Ride. He's worst. Um Oh, I don't want groomsmen at my wedding. I don't want well, it's kind of up to you. I'd be weird if you had bridesmaids and I had no groomsman. Uh, I will have zero grooms man. I hate the thought of having to have like six friends that I'm like, your friends are better friends than everyone else in the crowd.

And then the people in the crowd that aren't up on the groomsman part. Uh Like, oh, like, why am I not a groomsman? It just seems like unnecessarily stressful to me, So no groomsmen. Um. I just want one of my really good friends to officiate, and then everyone else is just in their seats. Yes, And I want us to all sit on hay bales, and I want us to have hay hooks that you drag the hay bales into the house after the ceremony for the reception, that you then use as a seat in the reception

as well. But that's the workshoped idea. We can figure something out about that later. Hi, It's Bethany Frankel. My time on the Wheelhousewives of New York is a few years behind me, and now I'm ready to put the reel back into the real Housewives. That's where my new podcast Rewives comes in. This isn't your typical rewatch podcast. I'm watching only the most iconic episodes from all cities.

I'm sharing never before heard stories of what happened behind the scenes, and I'm not just pulling in cast members for postgame analysis. I'm doing something a little bit more interesting. If you've ever seen an episode of The Wheelhousewives, you know the drill. But beyond throwing drinks and legs, there are lessons about marriage, divorce, friendship, money, parenting, and fame. If you have the right minds, analyze and dig deeper.

So I'm bringing on unexpected thought leaders and celebrities to get their take on the chaos this season. I sit down with Elizabeth Moss, Kevin Neil and Susie Orman, Griffin Johnson and more. You think that there isn't much to learn from flipping tables and yanking wigs, but that's where you're wrong. Listen to Rewives with Bethany Frankel, the I Heart Radio, Apple Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your favorite podcasts. Do we have another question for Ami, who

makes most of the decisions with the remote control. Biggest pet peeve about dean um care. He likes to pick his nose hairs out to make himself sneepy nice. I don't love that. Infut flick. Sneezing is so underrated. It's one of the most enjoyable bodily urges. Dude, Ashley gets so mad at me when I sneeze because I let it go. I'm not holding anything back because she tries to hold in her sneezes like a psycho and she's like, and I'm like, and I I wind up like it's

like a hole. It's like, you know, really, I guess the next snats back and I'm let because it feels so goddamn good. Cover cover with the elbow. It feels great. I love it. Most annoying habit Calin has. Oh uh do I know this or her habit that she has? Well, I have decided just recently that Klin, in my opinion, is a hypochondriac. I wouldn't nessarily. I don't know if that's necessarily a habit, but you do have a habit of scaring yourself out of things, but I think it's

more of like what's like a physical habit that you do. Um. Well, I just wanted to get that out there. I wanted to put that out into the ether. Uh. You don't really have any weird habits and you're the habit is that I don't like about. You are telling me not to do the habits that you don't like. A mind like I was like humming yesterday, and Calin is like, don't hump basically, And so you're habits of telling me not to do things. That's not that bad, though. One

word to describe Dean. One word to describe Klin, you first, a one word to describe Calin perfect, really feel perfect. He's my perfect little angel. But that's three words, perfect little angels. So just perfect, say unique. You're unlike anyone I've ever met what you are, and you like that by yourself, Caitlin, Does Dean remember to put the toilet seat down? No? Wait, that is a load. He actually doesn't really lift it all the time. I am bread

with fury right now. I go out of my way all the time to lift and replace the toilet seat, and I am good. Now you're telling me that's going unnoticed. You're telling me you don't recognize all this hard work that I do for you. I thought you peter with the seat down. Sometimes you do, because the soilet seat is always down when you go there to use it. Doesn't mean I pe with the toilet seat down. That just means I'm very good at replacing the toilet seat. Yes,

blown away. Right now, I'm gonna start peeing all over the seat. I have a question do sometimes? That's why I think you don't lift all the time. Yeah, Is it really that bad to pee with the toilet seat down? Just if you miss? Well, here's here's the thing. I I don't live the toilet. See. I've never lived at the toilet. See. I gotta be honest. I was never

taught to lift the toilet seat. So when I in my older years, found out that that was a thing, because obviously, you know the toilet seats up and down. But I was like, oh, oh, you lift it for guys when they pee, and you put it down for girls, because I remember, this is how I found out. This is honestly how I found out. This is so pathetic.

I was watching What Happens in Vegas with Ashton Kutcher and Cameron Diaz, and there is a scene in there where he takes the toilet seat off and she goes to pee in the middle of the night and she falls in because the toilet seat is not there. And then I was thinking about the toilet seat and the purpose of it, because I'm like, obviously they sit there. But then I was like, oh, the do you never

put the toilet seat down? Because all my life I assumed that putting the toilet seat down was putting like the lid down, not the seat, the lid, and that like guys didn't do that. And I was like, but then so many people I go to their houses and the toilets up what I thought with the toilet seat was And then I was like, I don't get it, Like they always say that guys don't put the toilet seat down, but like any restaurant I go to, it's

always up. But then I realized, wait a minute, that's like the lid and then the seat is the actual seat, and all my life I've been peeing with the seat down. Soon but as a guy, like how bad is your aim? You've got You've got a really good practice on a small target, which is pretty impressive. There's this, uh this tick talk video of some guy talking on a podcast

about this exact scenario. Very good. It's pretty funny. It's a guy and who I assume was his girlfriend talking and he's saying, why would I lift the toilet seat up to Pete just to put it back down after I'm done. That's two actions per yearinary event. And then when the girl goes Pete, it's zero because she doesn't have to put pick up or put down. And what he was trying to say was he should pick the toilet seat up, do his business, and then leave, because

that's one action per yearinary event. And then when the girl comes in to use the bathroom, she would lower it. That's one action per yearinary event. It's just an equal division of labor, essentially, is what he's trying to say. And it makes a lot of sense. And I'm now now that you're telling me that you don't notice how hard they work to keep the toilet seat down for you, it's game over. No, no, no, I really appreciate it.

Please don't change. Also, I gotta say this to underrated for a guy is just to sit down to Pete. I I love sitting down to Pete, but like half the time I'll go just sit down, pick a load off percent because now it's just when I need some alone time. I'm like, all right, I'm and I don't have to go number two, Like I'm just gonna go pee. I'll sit there and just be on there five minutes and just just breathe a little bit, maybe scroll through TikTok, have a nice little time by myself. Um, oh, what

was I gonna say? Oh? Dean blew my mind one time years ago when we used to record this podcast in the I Heart Radio UH building. We went to the bathroom and we're in the urinals next to each other, and Dean said something that literally blew my mind, and he goes, you know what doesn't make sense to me? He said, our hands are so dirty. We have to wash them obviously, but before we wash them, we touched

our genitals, Like we touched like that part. Why would we not wash our hands prior to using the bathroom? And then I was like, that makes total sense to me, because our hands are so dirty from touching door knobs or shaking hands. They get so much bacteria in though. And then we go to the bathroom and before washing our hands, we will literally you know, we have to

do that. We gotta get it out, so like you touch it and then like you're touching it and then you're moving the back to here from your hands to like a sensitive part of the body, and I was like, that makes sense to me. Yeah, yeah, they should. We should pre wash and there should maybe even be penis washers in the bathroom too, because if anything needs to be washed after peeing on a man, it's the penis. So it just get like a little holes you stick in and it just spurts this a little antiseptic on

it or something. Yeah, like a little like a little glory hole you just go in. That sounds like it was sting. Well, it's it's an imperfect system. Will work out the king. It is imperfect system. There's some merit to the idea. So my last, my final question before we sound off and then quickly talk about what the punishment should be for our fantasy football This time, Kalen uh So, Dean talked about how you both wanted to

pose to each other. So is there a uh timetable, like do you think this potentially could happen before the end of the year or do you not even want to say because you don't want to ruin this price at all. No, it definitely will happen before the end of the year. The problem is, Dean is so hard

to track down. So like my plan to make this extravagant, elaborate proposal is just like quickly, I'm realizing it's just unrealistic because he has a golf tournament, he's going here, he's like always doing stuff, and I've tried to make a plan without giving it away that I'm like trying to plan the proposal. So I think it might be a little bit lamer than what I'm anticipating, but it will be before the end of the year. She's flying out a photographer for a random engagement shoot in December.

I would be shocked if it was. No, it's definitely not that that's in January. It's happening before the end of the year, right right, right right. You know, one of my favorite characteristics about myself is I'm hard to pin down. So good luck pinned me down for this engagement because gathering stone don't or a rolling stone don't gather any moss, so they say, m I'm sorry now, I was thinking. I was daydreamed about like all the

ways she could propose. I was thinking of, like, because golf is so important to you, and not I hope I don't want to say, because I don't want to blowuper spot. If this is even a possibility, but like somehow you put a ball in on like the eighteenth hole and you've got to reach in and then like there's a ring there. I wanted to do something golf related, but he was like, I don't want to be known as the golf guy. I do cooler stuff than that. I don't want to I don't want to be known

as a golf guy. Ei. There are times. There are times where I play golf, like like four or five times in a week, and after I look I don't know the week. I look back on the weekend like, wow, I did nothing this week and I have nothing to be proud of. I shot nine five every day this week, and I am so upset and I never want to play golf again. And the next week comes around, I'm like, oh, all I want to do is play golf. But I don't want to be known as a golf guy, you know.

I want to be known as like the cool skydiving, rock climbing, mountain climbing cool guy. Yeah. Ashley sometimes wonders why I play sports because I'll be in a bad mood afterwards. She's like, do you even enjoy playing? I'm like yes, but when I don't play well, it ruins my day. And then I usually don't play well because

I'm not good. Um, so quickly before we signed off on this podcast, Uh well, first of all, thank you so much for sharing your story, and and Caitlin, thank you for sharing the true side of the story and not Dean's alternate side of it. Um, but congratulations to you both. It's so exciting. Um, I'm very excited to hear Caitlin what you have in store for your proposal. And um, yeah, you guys are just both often awesome people.

So congratulations, it's very exciting. And before we sign off, Dean and I are playing each other in fantasy football this week is the annual help I suck at eating Football off if you will. I'm four and four in the league. Dean, what the hell's your record? Four and four? We're both four and four. I think I'm porn for you. Yeah, so we both suck. Um. We're also do you know who else is for? There's so many people who are

four and four in this league? Tanner's four and four, Chris Randon is four and four, Jason Tartik is for and four, Nick is three and five. He sucks Joe. Do you know what grocery store? Joe's record is one and seven? Probably pretty bad. I think he's pretty consistently bad. Oh my god, do you know who number one is? Do you know who's leading the well? So Michael Michael A is tied. So it's Michael A, Ben and Bennett. If you remember Bennett from I don't know, uh, tastious season,

it was clarentatious season. Um, yeah, they're all in first place. Holy ship anyway, So no Bennett, No, Bennett is the executive producer. Oh yeah, it's Benett's because yeah, that's Bennett. Bennett was like that he's been like the EP for like years and years. Oh yeah, yeah, it's Bene Benett. Yeah, never mind, I'm losing my mind any who. Um, alright, so we do have to figure out, like what's our

punishment gonna be. Maybe Caitlin can think of something. So Jared and I are playing each other this week in fantasy football? What could the loser? What happens to the loser? Um? I really liked what Mark had to do, your friend Mark for fantasy That was for losing the entire season, though, what was it? What we made we in our fantasy football league. We made the loser. He had to reshoot ESPN the Body magazine issue. So he's like naked with

a football, like you're doing a puny football post. There is no way I'm showcasing any part of my body. I agree, not very single game. If punishmentber a single game has to be a lot more lighthearder than that. Our other one is. It's pretty uh in our other league, same league actually that the guy did the esp in the body issue. I don't love this punishment very much,

especially because I'm in last place. But loser has to spend twenty four hours in an eye hoop and every pancake you eat the ducts one hour from your steak. And it's just a little it's a little played out. I think to many people are doing that one. But I want maybe we can have the listeners. That's nothing but the pancake thing. Hold on. So if you tell me so, if I get a stack, If I don't, because I knowing I lost the season, I would go

in starving. I would not have eaten anything. That's where I would start my twenty four hours and a stack of pancakes. If I ordered, I know six pancakes is a lot, but I could eat six pancakes in one sitting if I was really hungry. Okay, so that's eighteen hours, and then I just spend two more hour Like I bring my laptop. I worked for two hours, So what am I down to now? And I have six pancakes and then I'm still ten hours? See it's yeah, yeah,

it's a long as day. Yeah yeah, I would. I think I would get there, get to i Hub at like five am and just down like six pan kicks like you said, uh, and then do my best to eat like maybe six more and then that way I'll be out of there by dinner time. That's kind of the that's like the it sucks because I'm two and six in that league, well behind everyone I auto drafted because I was in Nepal during the draft two QB league,

and I auto drafted Zack Wilson and Carson Wentz. And I'm like, I cannot believe ESPN auto drafts me the two worst quarterbacks in a two quarterback league. I'm two and six. It's unbelievable. Um, but email us what you guys think our punishment should be? Jared and I or d M s. You can email us I Suck a Dating at iHeart media dot com, or simply follow us on Instagram. Help Underscore I Underscore suck Underscore at Underscore Dating. That's so harder to say that I expected it to be.

D M is what you think the punishment should be? Um, I think I'm projected to beat Jared, So make the punishment as projections mean nothing. Yeah, I agree, I agree, But that's gonna do it. For this week's episode, Like I said, we're recording live from the Galapagos Islands here off the coast of Ecuador, so I'm sorry if our audio wasn't the best, and there has been a bit of a delay, so it's kind of why there might

be some awkward pauses. But thank you so much for listening to this episode of Help I Suck at Dating. If you want more of just this exquisite content, why don't you jump over to True Crime Reality and listen to Klin talk to who's your first guest? Gonna be Teddy Mellencamp about some true crime reality. Um uh, stuff that's happened to her. So let's flip over to that and then tune in next week where maybe we suck

just a little bit less. Follow help by suck at Dating on I Heart Radio or wherever you listen to podcast