It Goes Down in the DMs with Deandra Kanu

that's not a boat. She's not a boat. It's fine. Um, danger we had you on I think back in like April to co host an episode with us, Right, Yes, you did nice. Well how have you been, what's going on? What's been new since then? Um? I've been great. I'm still in l A because I know when I first hopped on here, I was new to l A, was so fresh. But now I'm like getting a little more used to everything of just living life. It's the holidays, so I'm really excited for that. Yeah, where you're Where

are you originally from Dallas, Texas? What's dating like in Los Angeles compared to Dallas. I wouldn't know, because I've yet to go on one day in l A. No, it's true, is that that's got to be intentional though it's I mean, the thing is, I don't know, well, when I've heard that l A dating is terrible, no one here is looking for anything real. But I just honestly haven't met anyone in l A. Like I've met people outside of l A, but just not in l

A that I've gone on dates with. So what do you mean in l A, like you haven't met like you like go on a trip and meet someone, or like you just haven't met anyone like the out in l A. Or how does that work? That the bos That's what he was gonna say. I was I don't want to I didn't want to project because that's the only where I would ever meet people. But I you know, people meet every people everywhere, so well, one, I don't

really go out that often. Like when I go out, it's like maybe like once a month or like twice a month. So it's like I don't really get to meet a lot of people out like that. So the only way I'm really meeting people is if it's like I go on a trip somewhere and I happen to meet some friends or like a friend of a friends, or like Sun reaches out on Instagram which is not

ideal at all. But I feel like everyone that I've ever met is outside of l A. I'm not, you know, I haven't really met anyone in l A. But it sounds like it's not like a super high priority for you, or is it? Um? I mean, I all, I mean, I would love to meet someone. I would love to date someone, but it's just like I can't force anything. Like I don't want to get on Hinge, I don't want to get on Tinder. I'm not there yet. I'm more so like an organic kind of data I wanted

to happen naturally nice. I would say the fact that you're not on any of the dating apps, um, I think enforces the point that you're not making now, that you're not making a priority, but that you're not going to settle for something that you don't want just to have a boyfriend or a partner or whatever. You know, right, I definitely don't want to date someone just to date someone. I want to date really intentionally. But it's not that

I'm against dating apps. Eventually, I think that would be like my last ditch effort to try to the last resort better than going on the Bachelor. Maybe not so much. I think that's kind of a last resort sometimes too. Um. So you live full time in l A. What part of l A? Do you live in Hollywood? Okay? Nice, Well that's your first mistake. You shouldn't live in Hollywood. You should live on the West Side somewhere. Jared, are

you in l A? No? So, I actually and I lived in l A for about three and a half years. We lived in West Hollywood. But I used to go to the gym in Hollywood. What the hell gym did I go? No? Well, I did actually go to twenty four hour Fitness. There's actually funny story about that. I don't know if I can tell it on air, you

can tell it. Let's sidebar tell the story. Well, the twenty four hour Fitness was right next to my house in l A. And there was a gentleman there who would constantly hit on me, I mean aggressively, And so every time I went to the gym, and if I saw this particular man, I'm like, you gotta be kidding me, because one time he came up to me very sweet. But I was on the treadmill. You guys know how awkward it is, and when you're working out you got

the headphones in. This is before actually and I were married, so I wasn't wearing a ring yet. But so he came up to me and then like he was like waving me and I was like, oh, what's up? And then he was like, oh, how how many how many times a week do you come here? I was like, um, I'm I don't know, like four or five, you know, I try to get here. He's like, dude, You're just like, you know, what do you what do you do for

workouts from really good shape? And I was like I just you know, I I don't know, I just come in. I kind of listened weight so I do treadmill Like I don't know, I just do you know, well I appreciate that, thanks man. And then he's like yeah, you know, he's we should work out some time together. And I was like, oh, um, you know, uh, you know, I usually just come in like because my schedules all over

the place. And then even like I didn't know if he was being friendly or not friendly at this time, so I was just like, well, I'm not looking for a workout, but anyway, becau just like going to the gym, keep my headphones on, get the hell out. And then every time I'd go back and I see this guy and he was there quite often as well. Immediately would come out to me and then asked if I wanted to get drink one time, and then I said I wasn't a relationship, but then I don't know, it's still

like awkward. So I literally left that gym because of that guy. Honestly, that can be so awkward knowing that one wants to hit on you in the place that you go to, like the zone at work out. There's nothing worse. Oh so then I was so then this fitness has like an ab room, so it's like a small little eight by eight room in the back and so a room. Oh there goes Jared, there he goes, and anyways, I think that's what what he was gonna say. That's when he first kissed this gentleman. Um So, okay,

so daving is not a priority for you. We'll we'll get off that until Jared comes back in here and rejoins us. But um so, so like you go on these trips, you meet these guys, but they don't live

in l A. That's obviously a bummer. You don't want to go any dating apps, but what, like you, obviously I want to find someone eventually, right, So what do you think are you doing anything like right to find a person right now or are you just kind of going along with your life and hopefully someone falls into it, because like we kind of mentioned too earlier. Um, they're like they're not not that desperate is the word I

want to use. But like, when you're really looking for a partner, you tend to like cut some corners right and like slack. So that's not something you're willing to do, is what you're saying. Yeah, so, well, being twenty six, I feel like my clock is ticking. You're only six, yeah, but I feel old. I'm like, I don't know why. And I mean this in the most polite way, like

I guess that your maturity. Uh, I thought you were like twenty nine or thirty really, And I mean, like that's not I'm not like just like you don't get me wrong, but you seem like a very mature person. And I think that's part of the problem. Is I definitely want to date, Like I'm a lover. I'm a lover girl. I want to date. I want to be

in a relationship. But what I ound is the more that I was like searching, the more I was finding people who weren't mentally where I am, so like I would starting on the pool and then I would find out that they're really immature, they're not looking for a relationship or you know, they don't have the same morals

and values as me. And it just became a thing where I'd rather be super selective and go on a date like once every two months with a person who's mentally watched with me, then hanging out with a bunch of different guys just to kind of see, yeah, you know, and see there in lines the maturity to that a twenty six year old barely encompass it. So because I mean, I agree with you, I waste your time? Why waste

their time? Hey, Jared, Welcome back to the podcast. Hey, So my computer died even though it was charging, which makes me really sad because this has been happening over the past few weeks. Which the reason it's so sad is because I think there's something wrong with my computer and I don't want to buy another one because my entire life is on here and it's just like, damn it, I hope nothing. I just it was literally plugged in and then it just turned off. And this is not

the first time what's happened. It makes me quite It makes me quite worried because like, I don't want to get it. My whole little laptop, I know, but it's very expensive. And then everything is on here, like, oh my, I don't know any of my passwords because everything is just automatically locked in. If somebody had this computer, my whole life would be you know, Dawn, I shouldn't let's cut that, Let's keep it. I think it's important. It's important for our listeners to know how attached to your

laptop you are. How old is the laptop? Is it like twenty years old? No? How old is this laptop? We bought it when we first got together, right, so two that was an eighteen it's like four years almost five years now. That's not bad. No, that's not bad at all. Quick sidebar on your sidebar, I bought a new laptop like a year ago. Best investment I've ever made. Anyways, continue on with your ab rooms part of your story.

Appreciate it. So I was in the ab room, which is in the back, and this was the last time I went to that gym. I'll never forget it. And I was laying down because every time I saw this guy, I would immediately just go in the other direction, right, so like he was near the weights, I'd go to the treadmill. If he was near the treadmills, I go near the weights. So then I'm I forgot to tell you this too. This is an important part of the story.

He gave me his number, well because he I of course had my phone playing music, and he goes, oh, you should take my number sometime we'll hang out. I was like, yeah, sure. Like he's like, just text me your number. I said, yeah, okay, So of course I take his number, never text him. Ignore, like going on with my life. Then I'm in the alb room laying down doing my crunches or whatever the hell I'm doing. And then I look up and guess who walks in? And the problem is, this is like an eight by

eight room and I'm literally on the floor. I got nowhere to go. He goes, hey, man, what's going on? I said, oh, hey, glad, good to see you, bro. What you know blah blah blah. He goes, hey, you never texted me? I said, oh, I'm so sorry, man, just been super busy and just a lot going on. He goes and he literally, you're not. He goes, well, your phone's right there. Just just text me right now, so I have your number. And I was like, I don't know how am I gonna get out of this one?

And so then I can't believe I did it. I I was. I got up and I was like, oh, yeah, I'm texting right now, like as I'm grabbing my phone and walking away, and I was like, yeah, no, no, I'm texting right now, dude. I'm so sorry. I'm like, I'm I'm looking at you up right now. Um. He's like, yeah, dude, let's hang out sometime, like just text me right now. And then but he said it in like a creepy way and so not in a friendly way. So I was like, and then I just I don't know what

the hell I said. I was like, oh, this guy is blue, I'll see you later, and then um left immediately, even though I was at the gym for five minutes, didn't get to work out, and then never went back to that gym. That's a lot of pressure, dude. I couldn't believe it. The balls, the balls, for someone to be like, just your phone's right there, just text me and it's like, oh no. But that's the worst though. I think the worst thing is when someone that you

don't want comes up to you. They're like, oh, add on Instagram and you're like okay, well they're like, no, give me your phone, like I'll look it up right now. And I'm like, oh gosh, don't do that. They said, don't do that. Guy. That's tough too, because then you want to, like you the like post like in a month or two, and you're like, who is this person?

How do I know this person? And then you feel like a jerk for having unfollowed them because like, obviously you're not interested in what they're doing because you don't know who they are. Right. Have you ever been called out for un following someone? Yeah? I have been too. Yeah what do you say? I always just say, yeah, sorry, I'm just not interested in what you're doing in life. I wish I could, Jared. What do you say, like, oh,

is a glitch an accident? Yeah? I say it was an accident And I immediately followed them back and now I'm following their lives and I don't care. That's the only reason you followed me. Let's be honest tough times saying no, uh de Andrew, you said, sometimes you do slide into guys dms, or do you guys slide into your d M? Oh no, I would rather die than have to slide to guy's dams. But sometimes guys do.

It's not always like you can kind of tell what kind of guy they are when they slid into your d M. So it's not always like the most fruitful slide ends. But every once in a while I'll reply, you know, I mean, Kalin slid into my d M S And here we are nearly four years later. Yeah, well you guys are also on a show together, were you. Yeah, that's true. She slid into my d M S and she wanted to meet up her coffee and I ditched her, which is not I'm not bragging about that. I'm really

actually sad about it. Uh So we didn't end up a really meeting until we both went on the show. But I agree with you, like the person that's gonna d M you to meet up. Maybe it's like the same kind of person you meet at a club where it's like you you could find a good person that way, but the odds are kind of against that happening. But I also feel like if he's dm ng me, then think about how many other people he's damned too, because it's like she talk like they bill shoot out five

and then like one or two will hit. So you just never I'm not against it. I'll reply sometimes, but you can immediately kind of tell the vibe that they're giving. Yeah, that's that's interesting. I am always it's like baseball, you know what I mean. If if you're in too fifty, that's not that's a solid batting average right there. You're still an All star. Yeah. I'm always curious because, like, guys and girls experience coming off of the show are

so different in so many ways. And I've never like creeped on Kalin's dms, especially before we like like when we first got together whatever. But I can only imagine like the difference in the d ms that guys versus girls get. You know, like, obviously the viewership of the show is mostly female, but you still are going to have a lot of guys that, like, I guess you can catch their eye and they're still gonna want to

reach out. But I feel like most of my d m s, especially now, but even back when I was single and Jared, I don't know what your input on is on this, but like I would say, of them are like middle aged married women who are just like weighing in on my life. And it's never like anyone like sliding in to like holler at me. You know, it's mostly people just like giving their their opinion on my life. I feel like, yeah, I feel like it's kind of the same way for women a little bit.

There's like some guys scattered here and there, but honestly, it's a lot of women at the dems, probably because the show gets a lot of women viewership. Yeah, Jared, what are your d ms like these days? These days it's just you know, your baby is very cute, You've you've lost yourself. Uh you still have patched your facially here now I'm kidding about the last two. Usually it's just like, uh, yeah, it's it's it's people criticizing my life or telling me what I should or should not

be doing. But that's okay. At least, hey, they care, they care a lot. But honestly, a lot of the d ms are very nice. I still get I still check dms because like the box that says request, because sometimes they'll be like, h well, a really good opportunity, you know, from I look for the blue check marks. I'm very vain people, that's what I look for in the request. I look for the blue check marks. And I'm like, is this like some sort of really cool opportunity? Um?

But yeah, that's pretty much. My dms are very boring. You know, They're just a question you guys who are both in relationships. Do you guys still like randomly have women try to hit on you even though you're in very public relationships or do you feel like no, I there's like maybe a few people that are consistently my d M s saying not like inappropriate things, but definitely

like shooting their shot. But that's just that's like it's not obviously as common as it was when we were single, but it is interesting because I'll like see a message and I'm like why what, Like I've just got engage, why are you sending me these things? Not like they're like no, they're not like pictures or anything like that, but it's it's like I love you, or like you can just go back through the like the search or the common history, and they say like a bunch of

like things, flirtations, flirtatious things. I guess you could say, um, but yeah, it is interesting. I remember once Ben, when Ben started dating Jess and that he like posted his relationship for the first time or something like that. He was like, it's really weird to go from being a famous, famous, very loose, obviously famously single person to now being in a relationship, because your internet persona kind of changes a little bit, and like obviously the people that are like

interacting with the changes quite a bit too. So fortunately for both of us, Jared, I would say, I think we kind of got the long end of the stick in the sense where people got to see our relationship happen on TV. I know, yours is kind of like off TV, but then you got engaged on TV. So I'm counting it, and I think that helps a lot, because, uh, not everyone that sees you on TV is going to

follow you on Instagram. So the people that see you in a relationship onto like, there's gonna be more people that see you in a relationship on TV, and so it kind of like sets the precedent moving forward that you're in that relationship. You know I would agree, and talking about the internet persona. I've been thinking about this not a lot, but I've given thought to it, and I really I haven't told told Ashley that's just sitting

next to me. I need to like really identify myself because I feel like I'm just just losing who I am individually, because I'm just this dad who put like I need to post like a workout video, you know what I mean and be like, no, guys, I'm still I could still lift weights and I can still do things on my own as an individual, as a man, instead of just like this dad, It's no, it's not me. And also you do do that you'd like post about Tom Brady all the time. You post about your quarter

pounders with cheese and cheese so good. I can go for one right now q PC. But also your life changed, so it's like this is like you are a father, you are you know, a partner, you're all these things, and it's of course it's different from when you were single, but you're still you. It's just the majority of what you do now with your life it's different. So it's not inaccurate and it's not like you've lost yourself but this is a new role that you play, you know.

I guess it's also I am a new person. I guess it's also owning a business and hiring all these college kids because they just they look at me and I'm I'm just like the dad. Now I'm that guy. I'm the dad, and I'm like, oh god, I'm just I'm old as hell. Dandrew, I gotta ask, So, if a guy is going to slide into your d MS, what would be your preferred like method or verbite that

they use. I love like when a guy is just straight up like I don't even know want to waste time in the dams, like, or you do you want to go on a date? Like that would be my first thing. It's like I just want. I like when people cut to the chase because I'm not really a small talker, Like I'm not going to go back and forth if I can't really tell your attentions. So I think, like, if you're going to be in my dams, like, let's try to meet in person, Like let's not even waste

the small talk. Obviously you have to be a real person, but not I'm not really catfish. I don't think that ever. Happens to me. But um, I like the people are just straight to the point. I'm an in person person. I like that. And then how does like I saidone straight to the point, how do they catch your eye? Because I can only imagine how many guys must DM you on a regular basis, and like, how do you sort through the chaos and kind of pick which ones

that you would even consider responding to? Um, well, I don't, honestly, like, I probably response like one out of already, but a lot of them I look at their page, so like, some of them like just happened to be a majority of them happen to be like verified people, so I know that they're real people. And then I'll go to their page make sure they don't have a girlfriend, kind of seeing stuff that they're posting, I like, actually don't have a girlfriend. Make sure they have a girlfriend, because

you know, people do that and it's weird. Have you ever been to Have you ever gone to a guy's page and realized they are in a relationship, I'll trying to hit on you. Well, this is the thing. So I've had guys like consistently like my story because you know how we can like stories now and you don't necessarily photo, but you still get the notification. I have guys that will like my story consistently, and so I

was like, oh, you're cute. I went to their page a girlfriend and I'm like, what's why are you hiding liking my story post because it's my real posts. Um, so that's definitely happened. So I definitely sort through and I'm like, yo, I don't. I don't think that's stuff is cute because their girls. That's annoying. That's annoying for the guy's girlfriend. Um, what is your What is your type in terms of like do you want someone that like lives in l a lifestyle or do you want

someone that maybe lives more of a Dallas lifestyle. I think I definitely want someone who lives more of a Dallas lifestyle and Dallas lifestyle the sense that they're not like always on the scene. They're like, you know, they take care of their business, they're not always out. I think it's a red flag if someone's like consistently out

every weekend, That's not really what I'm looking for. So I definitely want someone who just lives more of like a I don't want to say normal but l A is very much you always want to be on the scene. It's always about who you dies here, just who you're with or you're hanging out with climbing the social ladder, and that's not really me. So I feel like in order to find that in l A, you have to be willing to date someone that's a little bit older, because twenty year olds in l A are always trying

to be out in like party and stuff. At least in my experience, like when I was twenty in l A, I only wanted to like party with my friends, and I was very undateable at the time. But now that I'm in my thirties, I think I've definitely settled down quite a bit. So is that something you would look forward to? Is or is age not really super important? Um? Well,

age it is important. I mean, I definitely want someone who's mature, but I don't know, like I feel scared, not scared, but I feel weird about dating someone who's significantly older than me. I think the oldest I would go right now is like thirty five. Just how old are you? I'm twenty six? Okay, yeah, so young. You don't don't stress, Oh my god, you're six. But my best relationship for you, my best relationship advice for you right now is don't be in a relationship. Just enjoy

your life. You're living in l A. You're having a good time. There's no reason to stress. If Mr Wright comes along, great. But you know, I want you to come back on this podcast when you're thirty two and then you're you know, then you're feeling a little bit less um positive about everything this podcast in six years. I I gotta say, I don't think Dan Andrews stressed

about it. I think I'm asking a lot of questions about it, even though you don't seem like you're very stressed about it, right Like you're kind of you don't seem like you're stressed about it or are you, nor should you be. You're beautiful, you're single, you're living in l A. But I mean people get lonely, Like for me, Um, I was kind of explaining to do it earlier, like I'm not the kind of girl that just likes to

hang out with guys just to fill my time. So a lot of times I don't hang out guys at all. Like I'll go from like going on a date and like talking to someone to like knowing at all, so it does get lonely. Like I want someone that I can travel with, because I feel like traveling with a

guy is so much fun. Um and like my friends can't always travel and get up and go all at all the times, and either can I. But I feel like I want someone to be able to do those things that I go to the farmer's market with, travel with, go to the beach with, go on dates with. I'm more so like want that companionship. So that's what I would be looking for in a a relationship right now. I don't necessarily have to be like married and like pop out a kid, but you know, I would like to

have a kid before I'm thirty. You know, is that weird? No,

not at all. I think that's perfectly normal. Um, when you do you what do you do for work in l A, Because that is a big part of it too, because when I was there and single, kind of like what you're saying, I had all this free time and all I wanted was something like if I wanted to date someone, I wanted to date someone that had the same amount of free time as me, so we could do those things like travel farmer's market, whatever it might be. But it's hard to find something well maybe less in

l A. It's hard to find this. But when your schedule is so free and open, it's hard to find someone that doesn't that also has that like freedom, you know. Yeah, out well, I think part of the problem for me is I'm not, like I don't have a lot of freedom. Honestly, I work from home because I work technically in Dallas, Like, I still have a full time job, so I work from home. And that's probably a majority of my problem is I'm at home a lot of the times and

content creations, so it's like I'm working two jobs. So I really don't have that much free time. And the kind of guys that I do don't have a lot of free time, you know, and they travel a lot for work and stuff like that, so it's always like scheduling conflicts. That's probably part of the reason I'm single.

But a lot of people are free, Like I'll look at my friends stories and they're like at the gym at like one o'clock in the afternoon, and like what I always think that too, because I don't have a job. I'm unemployed, but every time I go to the gym at like eleven am on a weekday. I like look around and I'm like, why are all these people here? Tonch of jobs? And then I look in the mirror and I'm like, but I'm here, So I can't really say anything about it. You know, I love it, though.

I want that flexibility. That's something I'm definitely working towards. It is very nice. And you kept mentioning traveling with a significant other. I will say the first couple of times you travel with someone new when you're in a relationship, that is the most fun because then you wake up together and you get coffee and it's like firtatious and new and free, and you get dinner. Your entire day is just you guys. You know, you wake up and you go get coffee and it's like to keep snuggle

time when you're waking up together. And then you go get like lunch or food, because that's what you do when you're on vacation and you go by the pool and relax for a while. Then you come back and cuddle more and then shower and then go out to dinner and it was a fun times. Those are good days. Actually. Thanks for sharing how to date someone on a trip. Jared, we appreciate it. It's a great it's a great vacation.

Three days of that. So what do you think of what do you think of going to Italy for your first date? Is that a first date option? Or now I'm I'm down to do that? Like Victorian Greg so was that their first date? Allegedly that was their first date. They went on their first date to Italy together, which I mean, hey, more power to them. That's a pretty

badass first date. But Jared, I don't know if you watched this this most recent season in Paradise, but Deandred it sounds like you might have seen some of it a little bit, but not a whole lot. Yeah, okay, got got you. It's like the only best I do

remember that that was that was my highlight of the show. Um, you know, my my only thought before we move on on the Victorian Greg thing would be, Um, I'm kind of in the camp that I just don't believe anything right now because I've been hearing so many different stories

that I'm like, I just don't believe either side. I think, Um, you know, I know the cliche line is, you know there's two sides to every story and the truth lies and somewhere in the middle, I'm just choosing not to believe either side because they're so like it's just one side is saying one thing and the other side saying something completely different from the clips that I've seen, I've not watched either full interview between Johnny and then the

Gregor Victoria one, But that's my two cents on it. Yeah, it's gotta be tough to break up with your fiancee and then do interviews that only revolve around you breaking up with your fiance like that sucks for both of them, for all of them. I don't know. I I don't I don't envy them in any way really, but hellum no, no, no, no, But but yeah, you're right. Let's take a quick break, Jared, and we can come back with Deandra and maybe talk about some headlines your favorite segment if you don't mind,

So take a quick break. We'll be right back. Hey, welcome back to help I suck a dating Dean myself. DeAndre is still here, going to go over a quick hot topic. Uh so, DeAndre, do you watch Dancing with the Stars at all? Um? Not really, but I mean obviously, I know the concepts. I know Gabby is on it right now. Yep, so Gabby is on it former bachelorette, our current bachelorette because she's maybe still single. We don't really know, but Gabby Windy is her last name from

this headline. And I've heard all over the social media platforms that she got lou flirty with the Vinny from Jersey Shore after her and her fiance Eric broke up from the show. So the article goes, the speculation continues. Gabby made another flirty appearance in Vinnie's comments after the pair previously sparked romance rumors. Now the Jersey Short star took to social media on Monday to share several posts of himself. The caption was, y'all need to get with

a strong seven or eight with a good personality. If he's too hot, he's not going to be funny or cook, Vinny wrote, alongside an Instagram video of himself dancing. Now the video also excuse me, that was the overlay, and the caption says, when you're meet when your medium hop

as somebody fine likes you. And then Gabby in the comments wrote, quote honestly at ten Now the Internet actration came shortly after uh they re lied to each other um from after Vinnie shared a snap of himself writing quote, if I'm a lot, go find less, and then Gabby wrote once again in the comments, a lot of you is never enough. So it's pretty pretty feels pretty confident that these two are flirting, dating, potentially in a relationship. Now.

I never watched reality TV before I was on Bachelor except for one show, and that was Jersey Shore, and I started watching it because DJ pauly D is from Johnston, Rhode Island. I'm a Rhode Island boy, and anytime someone's on Rhode Island but someone from Rhode Islands on TV, you watch that show because you support your local Rhode Islanders. And then I fell in love with the show because I think it's hysterical and fantastic. And one of the

characters I loved most of course was Vinnie. So the idea that Vinnie and Vinnie has been on this podcast before. He's awesome, great guy. So I would love nothing more for selfish purposes if Vinnie started dating Gabby, because then he is kind of like a part of Bachelor family, like all of us and the idea that I would be in the same grouping as Vinnie would just be a dream come true. So selfishly, I'm hoping that these

two get married. I mean, there's definitely something going on, because if they're bold enough to reply to each other in the comments and there has to be d m s, which means they're probably some kind of something going on. I would love that too. I guess they were on that show together for a long time, so wouldn't be the craziest thing in the world. But it is. Uh, it is funny, how especially when you go on a

dating show and Vinny was. I mean that Jersey Shore is not a dating show, but they dated on that show. Any type of interaction you have with your preferred gender is going to be labeled as flirtatious or anything like that. So it is just funny to see like the stirrup of a reaction that those comments get. But they are, I mean, they are very over the top flirtatious, but

it's I wouldn't read too much into it personally. Yeah, you're right, right, it's not very but I guess at the end of the day, they're both single, so you're doing it on purpose because they know exactly what they're doing, which I can't blame them one bit, especially if they're actually dating. I'm surprised that more relationships don't come from

Dancing with the Stars because you're in this. I know, it's you know, work, and you know you're getting paid to do it, and it's a TV show, but you're, you know, dancing, at least in my experience, I'm not a professional dancer. It's a very intimate and you know, I guess sexualized. I don't know how to phrase it, but it's very intimate right between you and another person. And then especially in Dancing with the Stars, everybody's always

dressed up. You're probably in great shape because you're practicing all the time. You're always in these beautiful costumes, and dance itself is very attractive. I'm surprised that there's like not more relationships that come from Dancing with the Stars, or maybe there are and we just never hear about it. M just because you're that close to somebody. It could be awkward if you're in a relationship and they're not

and you get I don't know. Yeah, I remember when Joe was on it, he kind of gave us a glimpse behind the curtain, and I think there are a lot more relationships than we see. And like, obviously the premise of the show mostly is dancing, and they get these like little sidebar storylines that they maybe like to share sometimes. But I do think I remember hearing him say there's a lot more going on behind the curtain then meets the eye, So I mean I wouldn't be

surprised if there's a lot more. Yeah, um, but yeah, I don't know, that's interesting. I maybe one day we'll get the chance to go on Dancing with the Stars and will know for ourselves. Yeah, they should have Dancing with the Stars help by Second Dating edition, and then you and I will every every uh new episode will sign off like make sure you guys tune in next week where hopefully we suck a little less at dancing Dandrew, would you do Dancing with the Stars with us to

help by second Dating version? Oh my gosh, I was just thinking, like I want to be on Dancing with the Stars. I think to be out of my element, but like in the best way. Yeah, I'm a very bachelor version of it. Now that it's streaming, you could do all different types of of iterations because it's not primetime TV. Actually, we should we should pitch this. We're pitching it right now and help us suck a dating.

There should be a Dancing with the Stars Bachelor edition were all the former Bachelor contestants alum that gets chosen get to compete against one another, and then a crown a champion would be crowned, and the judges are former Bachelor contestants that have one Dancing with the Stars because there's been Caitlin one didn't handle win Handle one? There anybody else? Did Nick win? It? Will? Nick didn't win?

But who Gabby? Wasn't Gabby? Just runner up? There's your three judges right there, Kitlin, Gabby, Hannah and Melissa Ryecroft. We're not gonna have any judge judge dancing competition. Um, I've got a question for you guys. So Caylin and I like, she's doing a lot of wedding planning, so we talked about it every once in a while. She came up with this idea that she wants me to play my saxophone at the wedding, and I rebuttaled that

idea with I want to play. Here comes the bride while I'm standing on the altar and while Kylin walks down the aisle on my saxophone. Oh my god, beautiful. Wouldn't that be the coolest thing of all time? But I feel like you'd miss seeing her though, like, you know, like to see her walk down the aisle. But I think that's such a cool idea. That's true, that's true.

She also said she doesn't want like when the bride walks down the aisle, the bride typically wants all eyes on her, and she was saying, if I do that, people would like be looking at me and laughing instead of like putting their attention on her, which I get. I get that point, but it's still it's a war workshop in the idea, it's gonna there's gonna be some saxophone at the wedding. For sure. Easton will appreciate this reference.

So sometimes you guys know the Marvel Cinematic Universe, Oh yeah, okay, So sometimes lately the m c U as we call it, gets criticized because they'll throw jokes into a scene or scenario that should not be jokey and it should be taken very seriously, and they feel like it takes away from the drama because they go for the joke instead of really just making it a serious moment. You playing the saxophone while Klin walks down the aisle, the you know, very funny it would be. I mean, I would laugh.

It would be a great jokey moment. But I do think that Kalin is correct that if it was me, would I be watching Calin walk down the aisle or Dean playing here comes the Bride on his saxophone while sailing at the altar? My eyes are on Dean, and I'd be laughing my ass off while Calin was walking down the aisland. I'm not sure if that's what If she wants to hear like all these dudes laughing while she goes down the aisle. Yeah, I think the compromise.

The compromise might end up being I might play here comes the Groom as I walk down the aisle. That's pretty good. Yeah, but there's gonna be some saxophone there. Um. But we are doing a lot of wedding planning. Well generally speaking, we're still kind of you know, we're like ten months away, but I can't remember when you We don't have a date set, but we have like a season, so I guess that kind of helps a little bit.

I remember when you were talking about the wedding planning process and I was always like brushing it off, Like whatever, Jared, you're just being dramatic about it. There's so much that goes into it and we've barely even just catch the surface. Yet it is. It is a very exhausting experience. Just wait for the last two weeks. We were like, we still love to do all this and we have fourteen days left. This sucks. Yeah, yeah, a lot of coordinating cool,

and just money. It's so expensive. I thought that we were going to be able to save money because we could use like my friends property in Aspen, and I texted him, I was like, hey, cound we like get married at your ranch and he's like, oh yeah, yeah,

of course. Just just reach out to my sister. And then we talked to the sister and she was like, trying to charge this full price, and full price is way too much money for us to get married in Aspen, so we might have to like diver and go somewhere else. But just the money aspect alone is like it's pretty intimidating.

My biggest uh advice for you Dean. Right now, for you and calin Uh is to just be shameless and ask for things in exchange for promotion, because that's what Ashley and I did and it helped out a lot. Because weddings are expensive, but your wedding will get a lot of attention and it will be written in articles. And if you get, say someone like People magazine to say we'll put you in the you know. I mean that's if you're like, hey, listen, guys, you got you

know for a vendor, You'll be in People magazine. Yeah. Can I ask you a very personal question that I need you to answer honestly? Yeah? Sure, I'm an open book at this point in my life. How much money did you spend out of pocket for your entire wedding? Oh? I don't know. If I don't know how overnight about this? Dean wants to know how much we spent on the wedding. We can't say, come on, it's it was. I mean it was in the six figures obviously. Oh okay, that's

enough for me to know. I don't want to know anymore. But that was all like it wasn't it was? It was a family affair. Yours was quite grand You had a quite a grand wedding. We had a grand wedding, and um, that was a part of you know, a big a portion of it. When we were talking about wedding and you guys are going through the same thing, it's like, okay, well do we save this money and use it on a down payment of a house or

do we put the money into a wedding? And so you know, I mean, we were, like I said, we realized that the wedding would be like a moment, you know, and uh, something that would uh it's just something that we wanted and we knew it would be good for us, and and we wanted we always wanted a big wedding, and we just we were when we decided to do it, we said, okay, let's do it. But you know, obviously

there was in the wedding planning process. Man, there's a lot of like, um, trying to save money as much as possible, you know, and these because these vendors charged a lot of money, and rightfully so, they do a lot of work. But you know, if you can somehow, you know, save some money on your wedding on and make it as beautiful as possible, why wouldn't you do that? Yeah, that's fair. I had another follow up question. I forgot what it was, though it was it was definitely yeah,

I'll tell you. I'll tell you some other time. Oh yeah. We're also trying to figure out, like the number of guests that we're gonna have, how many guests were at yours because yours and yours was a good size, like the perfect size, about one seventy. I think we ended up having seventy. How much do you know that many people? I like, I think I want to only about like twenty of my friends and like teen weeks of family wedding. I mean that's pretty good. But how do you know?

I know you're I know you're a popular guy, but like, how do you find a hundred and eighty people to come to a wedding? Dude adds up fast man, when you think about the plus ones were a big one and then you think about it, I mean, so I had what there were seven groomsmen? I think seven or eight, And dude, if you guys all had plus one and they're sixteen people in a blink of an eye, and then you um and like between cousins, like I think,

so my dad has four brothers and sisters. All of them have plus ones, so that's eight and then there's probably like fourteen kids between them and then plus one for some of them. So like just between those those two groups of people, you're talking about like fifty people right there. Yeah, that's true. We're we're like planning our engagement party right now, and we have a forty person venue and I like struggled to get forty people to come to an engagement party. Oh dude, you, I mean,

well how many you just have one? You just have your brother, right? Well, I got my two brothers, my sister. I'm like not close with my aunts, but I'm gonna invite them, I guess. But my point is, like we were making a list of friends in l A that we wanted to come to our engagement party, and I was like, in my head, I always am like, oh, I've got a lot of friends, Like I'm not gonna have any issues with this, And then I was like trying to write them all down, and I was like, man,

I don't have that many friends. I'm finding out, which I guess it's fine, but but not all your friends. Yeah, that's true. In l A is important that's a that's a good point. I don't know it's gonna be It's gonna be a tricky situation. But you guys need to set aside all the fall next year because you're both coming to the wedding, so just to be ready for that. Yeah, let's go, let's go party. What other hot topics you got, Forest, Jared.

I think that's actually gonna do it because we have uh we're wrapping up here on the on the final episode and not final episode, uh close to the final Help by such a Dating? Why are you looking at me? What do you mean the final episode? People? No, no, no, no no, this thing is never gonna stop. We're gonna be eighties still talking about how much we suck at dating. Um, but no, not of two? What is what is the week? We have three more episodes left, something like that before

God talmey flies by. Anyway, I think that's gonna do it for this week's episode of Help by such a Dating. De Andre, thank you so much for joining us. You were awesome. I think you're gonna be here for Thursday's episode of the Caller episode, which will be a lot of fun. Um Dean, Yeah, oh I love you too. I just wanted to say I felt I feel bad because de Andrew is an incredible co host, and I felt like I was just Grill and Jared with wedding

questions the whole time. No, I love it. I love being the third party listening here, and we appreciate you. You're You're the best. We hope to have you back June. Like Jared said, we'll have you for the Thursday's episode as well. Um, Jared, thanks for the insight of the wedding planning. I might have some more follow up questions, but I'll keep that off to the side in a in a private text, Um, we still have to figure

out your punishment for losing at fantasy football. That that was an action I never took on myself because I guess I just forgetful and lazy. But thank you to the listeners out there, Dandrew, thank you again for joining us, and be sure to you next week where maybe we suck just a little bit less. Follow help by Suck at Dating on I Heart Radio or wherever you listen to podcast