Bad at Breaking Up

Red Sox paraphernalia. It's pretty awesome. I love being in here. This is the first time I think I'm ever recording my our podcast from this room, so I'm pretty excited. I think that we can finally say cats out of the bag. Right You're having a baby boy, baby boy? Yes, we are, so we're very excited. We have the name picked out. Ashley has had this name picked out for twenty years. She's loved it and when she told me, I loved it. So we're do you have a name

picked out? So pretty much everything's good to go. We have a baby boy. You guys gonna do another Amazon Live video of telling everyone the name of the baby. I mean, fingers crossed. One can only hope, my friend, this baby is gonna be have more money than me before it even comes out of the freaking womb. Well, you know, college tuition ain't cheap. Paying for a coffee shop down here, you know, we gotta do what we

gotta do. But it was actually really fun. So we announced on Amazon Live yesterday the same thing we did with our pregnancy. And it's actually a lot of fun announcing on there because it's a live platform, so it's fun interacting with everybody in the live chat with us. Uh and you know, just having it live in the moment and not prerecorded. There's something to be said about that. And it was like a built up like moment. We're like, okay,

here we go. It's a boy, and everybody's saying congratulations. It was It was a fun moment for Ashley and I, So I'm really glad we did it that way. Nice man, We'll congratulations baby boy. Baby Dean's on the way. Um, baby Deanie, Deanie babies you want to I just found out too. Yes, they're like three days ago when I ever got Spontana is my brother is having a baby with his wife. Congratulations. Yeah, it was the weirdest thing. They were like, yeah, we just bought a house together.

I was like, great, an extra room for me to sleep in and they're like, yeah, we're gonna need all the rooms we can get. And I was like, okay, I guess it's kind of a weird thing to say. What you're talking about gonna be sleeping there all the time, guys. And then his wife looks at me and she like kind of like, you know, like smiles a little bit. I'm like, okay, are you guys like trying to tell

me something? And then they were like, we're pregnant. And I was like, this is the weirdest possible way to tell someone that you're pregnant. Just freaking tell me. I don't know, pregnant. That's so cute. So you're gonna be an uncle? Is that you're gonna be an uncle? Well, I Alred was gonna be an uncle with baby ha been on the way. But I'm gonna be an official real uncle with baby Bell on the way. It who would be nice? Oh so it's it's a girl. Bell is their last name? Oh okay. I was like Bell

it's a beautiful name. We already know the gender in the name. That's great. But it is a girl, so that is going to be a girl because I think what is actually do Ashley's do February? February tenth or eleventh, I think is the official day their baby is do February. So that you guys, oh, you guys had sex like right around the same time. Yeah, tight, tight, Tell to tell your brother, I said, nicely done, sir, Yeah done. There's just something in the air. And may I guess right? Apparently, dude,

Valentine's Day baby, that'd be pretty cool. Rob Thomas was born on the Valentine's Day. It's a great birthday. Yeah. Nice. Maybe maybe your baby and his baby could get married in years Yeah, I mean, who knows. On Bachelor in Paradise that would be. That would be something special. That's something horribly went wrong. Um. So we do have some hot tops coming in. We don't have any guests for you today, which is always the best because we're just

gonna host chatt It. We're gonna talk about hot topics. We also have some questions that we pose to you on our help. I start a dating instagram, which if you're not following already, please do so. Uh, And so we're gonna answer some of that, and of course we're gonna answer your emails. But the first topic of the day is about Alex Rodriguez. This freaking guy, Alex. Uh, this guy stinks. Alex Rodriguez shares photo of himself posing with Porsche that he gifted Jennifer Lopez. Obviously his ex.

Alex Rodriguez is certainly enjoying the finer things in life, which includes what some fans have pointed out looks like a red Porsche that was once a birthday gift to his ex Jennifer Lopez. Alex Rodriguez is uh, I guess, crushing into his new chapter in life. The former Yankee was seen grinning from ear to ear while posing in front of a red Porsche in his latest Instagram post, which on August eighteenth, is when he posted the caption

said I'm super down to earth. Real funny Alex. However, that wasn't the most noteworthy part of the post, with fans immediately noticing that his car that he has seen leaning on looked awfully similar to the lavish birthday gift he gave to Jennifer Lopez back in two thousand nineteen. One person even commented asking, isn't that the red car he bought j Lo. Another fan amongst many, obviously also hinted the uh at the return gift, writing I thought you gave that red Porsche to never mind when the

quote I'm real swift singer turned fifty. Obviously, Jennifer Lopez just turned fift nineteen, and Insider revealed to Eat News at the time that Alex gifted the red Heart commodity to his then fiance at an estimated cost of buckle up a hundred and forty thousand dollars. Holy crap, what a I hate this guy. You know, he's a Yankee. I've never liked the way he played and he I just feel like he's such a faker. That's what I

think of Alex Rodriguez. And maybe I'm biased because I hate the Yankees and he played for the Yankees, and he just like was just a I didn't just how do I say this without swearing? He was a pansy Like I don't know if you were into Intel four alcs, but he likes slapped the ball out of the first baseman's hand. To try to get on first base. It was just like, this guy stinks, and now he's taking pictures and smiling from ear to ear in front of a gift that he once gave his exten Philipez. Like, bro,

move on, she's happy with ben Affleck, she's upgraded. Why don't you focus on your own life? God forbid the guy takes a picture where he's happy. Jared, calm down, man, Your disdain for the Yankees can only go so far. First of all, the Yankees are great, and the Red Sox suck, especially after two thousand seven, but we've won two World Series since then. You have the Red Sox. Well,

I'm including myself in that statement. I'm saying two seven was the year that I really don't like because you guys swept us in the World Series the Rockies, That's right, Yeah, you guys were on fire. You guys were like eighteen and one in the players or something like that, and then you got to the World Series and we kicked your ass. Anyway, move on. Um My point is I personally, if I bought someone a hundred Porsche and then we

broke up, I would a thousand percent take the Porsche back. Well, My question is is this the actual Porsche or is he just trying to like get a rise out of j Lo, Because that's my question. I don't think he's doing that, man. I think that people are being a little too soft with that, Like, Okay, he's a grown man. Yeah, sure, Jlo moved on. But what he's not allowed to take the freaking picture in front of a sweet red car?

What's his name? Guy? I'm gonna look him up on Instagram here real quick because I want to get some more perspective to this. First of all, he's caption I'm super down to earth, not funny, it's sarcasm. His sarcasm is not my tuppy humor anyway. And this guy is leaning against the red Porsche that he apparently famously gifted Jennifer Lopez on her fiftieth birthday. He knew when he posted this picture that that's what everybody would be talking

about in including the host of this podcast. And he's getting what he wants because we're all discussing it. So it worked. So you know what, Clap to you, Alex Rodriguez. He got us all to talk about it. Here we are talking about you on the podcast today but you know what, doesn't mean I have to like it. I don't like him one bit because I think he's trying to get a rise out of my boy's girlfriend A K. Ben Affleck. And you know what, I don't dig it. Maybe Jay Look gave it back to a Rod and

now he's just happy to have his car back. Hey, he can have the car back. Yeah, And don't get me wrong, sure if you want to take the car back, take the car back, like whatever, it's your money, bro, But to lean on it, post about it, grinning from ear to ear. He knew, he knew everybody, like he knew exactly what he was doing. You're just being too hard on a Rod. Have you ever kept anything from

being a hater? Right now you are being a hater? Um. Yeah, Like we talked about this before in the podcast, like certain sentimental things I kept and then like stored away because we couldn't. Like I was like I remember finding a couple of years ago and be like, oh do I throw rowed away? Like it feels I feel terrible throwing away. But like in terms of like anything of value, No, I've never taken anything back from an next That would be kind of messed up even like a Rod. You

want to take your porscheback? Bro, Why you really need the money that badly? Something tells me that you don't. So if he did take the gift back from j Lo, what are you doing? Just let her have it, dude, I think you're looking at this all wrong. Maybe Jayla didn't want it anymore. Maybe Jlo was like, look, dude, I don't need this. I'm the freaking richest, hottest girl in the world. Why would I need your stupid, ugly red Porsche. Take it back? And now a Rod is

happy he got his car back. He's super down to earth and he wants everyone to know it, so he takes a picture and post on Instagram. I just I think you're being a little too hard on the guy you know well as you can tell not a fan. Alright,

well we agree to disagree. Our next hot topic is about a man who breaks up with his girlfriend via the Jumpo Tron, which, if if you guys don't know, a jumbo tron is, it's the huge television screen that is in every stadium of any professional sports league anywhere. So apparently this guy on the JumboTron put alyssa. This relationship is over from Tim. Uh. Tim, this guy went to a place very few are willing to go and

breaking up with a partner. Recently at Akron Rubber Ducks game, which is the double affiliate of Cleveland which, uh, Cleveland is no longer there the Cleveland Guardians, right are they the Cleveland Guardians this year? They just changed their name? I think so right now, so they're the double a affiliate of Cleveland Indians. The Akron Rubber tell X what a name? Anyway, this is in Cleveland. Tim broke up with his girlfriend, Alyssa now ex girlfriend in one of

the most savage, disrespectful ways possible. Alyssa, this relationship is over by the way, the overs and all capital letters talk about twisting knife. That's what the L A D L E D sign read at Canal Park. Alyssa, needless to say, has every right to be infuriated with Tim over this classless breakup without knowing the full story. However, I can't really cast judgment. This is obviously from the author of the article, not me, Because on help I

suck a dating we cast judgment. Generally speaking, there are only really two explanations as to why Tim would decide to go to these lengths to break up with a Lissa. First, Alyssa is deeply has deeply hurt Tim dealing with these feelings Tim right or wrong, So retribution by contacting the good people within the Rubber Ducks organization and likely paid to have this message displayed for all three thousand one and sixty fans to see at Canal Park. The second

explanation pretty simple. Tim is a scumbag. He's a scumbag guy who couldn't muster the courage to break up with a Lissa literally any other way. Either way, it sounds like it maybe for the best that these two are going their separate ways. So what are your overall thoughts about this? I think it's a joke and I think people misunderstood it. I agree, what kind of douche bag? Unless she cheated on him, that's the only explanation. If Alyssa cheated on Tim, then maybe he went to these

lengths to break up with her. But if he, if she did cheat on him, wouldn't like he also put that in the message, be like, Alyssa, I caught you cheating. It's over. It's definitely. It's definitely like they're still dating, and he's like playing a prank on her if that's if that that's at all? Yeah, it's like, I I am even angry to talk about this right now. I think it's hilarious. I kind of want to go to a Rubber Ducks game with Kaylin and do the same thing to her, just to get a rise out of her.

Just hilarious. All right, Yeah, let's play this out. So you go to the Akron Rubber Ducks game in Cleveland, Ohio, and you guys go and there's three thousand people there, and you get some popcorn. You're watching a baseball game, and then in the seventh inning stretch, you go, Caitlin, look, I put a message for you up on the JumboTron

and it says, Klin, it's over from Dean. How do you think she'd react, Well, first of all, it would be in the Las Vegas Ballpark where the Aviators play, because that's a greater street from our house in Las Vegas. But yes, let's let's say we find ourselves an Acron one day rubber Ducks are playing, we gotta go big game in the a c pcl UH tournament with something like that, and you know, It's like I and I

did that to Klin. I think that she would get uncomfortable and she would laugh and she would get very angry at me, But in hindsight it would be hilarious and she would laugh about off. I think, yeah, I'm curious how Alyssa would react if this was a giant joke. If because then like, what's the point? It's like, oh a good, It's a like a two second laugh for all that hard work, and now everybody in the ballpark

thinks that you guys broke up. Who cares? What the there's thans there and fifty six of those people will never know who they're talking about, you know what I mean? Fair point. So this brings up a question. Do you think it's ever acceptable to break up with someone not in person? I mean I've done it before. I've done like the FaceTime breakup, uh, probably a couple of times over were you guys in a long distance relationship? I feel like that's the only acceptable way to do a

FaceTime breakup. We were in a long relationship. Have you ever done that or are you a face to face guy? I've never done that. No, I've never broken up with somebody unless like somebody thinks that broke up with them. I don't think so. Okay, p s A. If you're listening to this and Jared has broken up with you, please call in and let us know how he did it. No no, no no no no no no no. But I do think for a long distance relationship, it is

acceptable to do a FaceTime breakup. I've had friends go through similar situations and like the relationship is dissolving, they went to just go visit one another. It didn't go well, they didn't break up over there, and then they were going to meet up like again and fly to like a central location, and all the while, one person knew that they were going to break up with the other,

and it was like what am I doing? Like, I know it sucks getting broken up with via FaceTime, but what's better breaking up with someone over FaceTime or spending hundreds, if not thousands of dollars to travel, stay at a hotel all just to break up in person. I think the FaceTime breakup is acceptable when in a long distance relationship. Now, listen, if you guys live down the street and you don't have the balls to break up with them in person, Okay,

that's a different story. I'm tring to think the last time I broke up with someone, I like him really bad. At breakups, I my method, Like, let's say I'm dating someone and I want to break up with them, I just like find ways to make them want to break up with me because I'm too scared for them to break up with to break up with them. You know what I mean? Is that what happened on the First Paradise? Uh? Yeah,

you know that. I don't think that's too far off. Honestly, I like this was like, I'm I'm gonna be a jerk and hopefully you come to your senses and you break it off with me, so that way I don't have to feel guilty for breaking off with you, but then I feel guilty for being a jerk for wanting you to do that. I don't know. It's not definitely not the best method, and honestly, it's the root of this podcast. It is the genesis that drove this podcast into creation. So um, I think we can all agree

that that's definitely not the best way to approach breakups. Uh, if you want to break up with someone, tell them why you want to break up with them, face to face if you can, or on the phone if you can't, and just be an adult about it, right, Could you agree with that? Yeah? I mean it's too bad that there are no adults on this podcast to really give more advice on that. Just to man childs Uh. Last hot topic before we take quick break, Jake Cutlor speaking

of guys that stink. Oh my gosh, let's go from a Rod to Jake Cutler. Oh I hate j Cutler. Oh it's the worst man. We're also Uh, you're a Broncos fan, so norder you hate this guy. J Cutler says dating is quote hard as hell. Oh, poor baby. After Kristen cavaliery divorce, priorities have changed, he said, getting back out there, j Culor's attempt to rejoin in the dating world since it's split with Christen Cavaliery has come with their fair share of lessons thus far. Quote it's

hard as hell. Really, Color, who's thirty eight years old, said on the podcast Uncut with Jay Cutler. Uh, meeting people as hard. I think finding out what people really want from you. I think that's probably an issue. Jay Cutler, who shares a son, Uh, Camden, two sons, excuse me two sons and a daughter uh with Kristen explained the struggle to connect with people that are on the same

page with him, especially as a parent. Now, listen before I go further into this article, totally get that as a parent, that makes dating harder because you're not only you know, introducing someone into your own life, you're introducing someone into your kid's life, which is a bigger, bigger deal. Quote. I'm at a different phase of my life right now with kids. Priorities have changed. Noted during this episode. It isn't just a purely selfish play on my part. The

whole landscape has changed. There are apps, there's Twitter, there's Instagram. It's a whole different ball game. You're not just walking into a restaurant or bar and talking to somebody that doesn't exist anymore. Well, it kind of still exists anyway. He goes on to say, we have nothing but love and respect for one another and are deeply grateful for the years that we shared memories and the children we are so proud of, he said, and enjoyed statement. When

they broke up years ago. This is just a situation of two people growing apart. So Jay Cutler talks about how difficult dating is out in the world now, Like I said, as a parent, as someone who has kids with his ex, totally get that that would be very difficult. Having said that, you're also Jay Cutler, you're a multi millionaire. You're doing okay. Now he could say that, oh, I don't know if someone's dating me for quote the right reasons.

I feel like that excuses a little dramatic and a blown out of proportion, Like if you're a good reader of people, you'll know if someone really likes you for you. Yeah, I mean to to just comment on that real quick. There were times when I was an insecure little boy and I felt that sometimes a little bit. And I'm not even I don't even hold the candle to the level of celebrity that j Color is, So I kind of see where he's coming from. But Color, he's like

a cocky dish back. He probably eats that crap up he like. I mean, I if you don't tell, if you can tell I don't like this guy, I bet you he probably He probably like gets weirdly turned on by knowing that people want to cook up with him just because he's Jay Cutler, you know, like he's like he seems like that kind of person to me. I love how our sports hatred is really just like oozing through this podcast my hatred for a rod for the Yankees, your j color because of what he did to the Broncos.

I love it, No, don't I love this? And he did a Christen Cavaliery too. Christ And Cavaliery arguably the second hottest woman in America behind Calin obviously, and he had he had to go out and ruin that relationship. Hey, I don't understand how they were even together in the first place. I never watched any of those reality shows or anything that they were on, But just knowing what I knew about Jay Cutler and knowing what little I knew about Kristin Cavaliery, it didn't make sense to me.

But obviously they had three beautiful kids, so I would still consider that relationship with success. I suppose. I just don't like Jay Cutler and dating as a single parent, I'm assuming is very difficult because for the reasons that we stated before, But it is easier for certain people out in the world because of their status or or their fine finances, and I feel like for Jay Culer it's probably a little bit easier. So hey, you know, do you bro? But yeah, that's it. That's all I

gotta say about that. Let's make an announcement to Jay Cutler. If you're listening to this podcast, which you probably are, he's change your minds about you. I would love to be your best friend. I would love to hang out. And it's not just because you're a famous former professional football player. I would love for you to change my perception you because what you did to the Broncos I'll never forgive you for. But if you come on, plead your case and make Chared and I your friends, I'm

totally done for that. Yeah. I mean, I would love nothing more than j Collier to come on this podcast because he'd be a great gut for us. Yeah, he would be a good gut. He'd be a probably are one of our best gets. Are arguably the best cat. He's a big I mean, I don't know. Brian bum Gardner, he's a good one. We had. Oh that's when you guys were the Giants game. I wasn't there, son of them that would have been a cool person at time. Bum Gardner from the office, Remember Kevin Kevin Malone. Oh,

I'm thinking of the picture that's Matt buon Gunner. I think no, I think it is Brian as well. And I remember when he booked Brian. I was like, why are we having the Giants player on our podcast? And I was like, Oh, it's Kevin from the Office. That's right, dude. Yeah, Brian was a big guy. He was awesome. So please

Brian come back on the podcast. We need you. Yeah, please, And I meant to, uh, I guess I don't know what I meant, but I did listen to his podcast after he guested on our podcast, and man, his podcasts are really good. So if you have the time and you're looking for more content to consume your day, check

out Kevin's podcast, Brian's podcast. That's very good. All Right, we're gonna take a quick break, and when we come back, we asked you sucky daters to share your own dating deal breakers and we're going to talk about them right after this quick break. All right, welcome back to help I suck at dating. Uh. So, we have a couple of things here. We asked you guys uh for some questions and answers on our Instagram and we also, yeah, we also have an article on here about men who

are asked to share their own deal breakers. I kind of conflainted those two between the break. But we have an article from BuzzFeed about men and their dating deal breakers, and we also have some questions, uh for Dean and myself that we posed to you on the help by sucitating Instagram. So let's get to the dating deal breakers first. So apparently popular Reddit thread. Uh. If you guys are not familiar with Reddit, I'm sure you are. It's like

it's like Twitter. Uh. So this thread asked men of the Internet, what are some of the deal breakers for potential relationship even if they're very attractive? And of course the thread quickly went viral as thousands of men started chiming in with their personal dating red flags in here or there's some of the top voted responses. So let's see, Dan, I want to know if you agree or disagree with these deal breakers. Number one having absolutely no sense of

accountability for their actions. Believe me, it is more common than you think. Is that a deal breaker for you? Dane? Oh my gosh. Of course accountability. Talk to Calin about this all the time. Accountability is very, very important. What do you think? Yeah, oh, I totally agree. You need self awareness. Number two complaining about everything, Yeah, I tell Calin this all the time. Complaining about everything is the

absolute worst. Number three lying, saying stuff about you behind your back, being mean to people for no reason, and being fake. Yeah I tell you this to Kailin all the time. No, actually, that's the one that I don't talk to Cailin about all the time. She's a nice person.

So I agree. If you're like mean, and I know you talk about this all the time, you feel like mean to like your waitress or the waiter or any like other person that's like simply there to like help you, then you're a bad date and probably like got some issues you gotta work through. Yeah. No, I can never. I can't imagine Calin ever being mean. Is she ever mean?

Like she ever get like angry? She that's a good question. Um, she can get kind of like snippy or something like if something's not going exactly how she wants it to, or like if she's on hold for too long, she gets like franky, And she doesn't get like mean or anything like that. But it's funny whenever I like So, I'm going to tie these two in real quick. So the comple anyone. Like a week and a half ago, I got my van stuck in some mud in Utah, and I called Triple A to come get me out,

and Triple A like dropped the ball. We were waiting for like four hours for the Triple A tow truck, and the whole time Caitlin was like complaining about She's like I just want to get out of here, blah blah blah. And I'm like, Bro, you're in the van, like you have a bed right there, you got a fridge full of you know, whatever you want right there, your snacks right there, your dogs right there, your boyfriends

right here? Like what like where if we were somewhere else, what would be going on differently than we're going right here? So like stop complaining about that. That was like the last she and I understand she's kind of stressed out. Anyways, I was on the phone with Triple A for like four hours, like on and on for four hours, and she was like getting really angry at me because she was like, dude, you're not being like mean enough to the Triple A people because they're dropping the ball and

you need to like incite some urgency into them. So She's like, let me talk to them, and I was like, no, you're not going to talk to them because she does. I know. This is I went off to on a tangent. No, No, this is the most couple thing I've ever heard of my entire life. Give me the right. She's really good at, like, you know, like if someone like in that case, like if they're dropping the ball, she's really good at like putting her foot down and be like, no, this is unacceptable,

blah blah blah blah blah. And I like him too easy going with that stuff. But so that's kind of that's like I wouldn't consider that her being mean, but that's how like that's her like snark coming out, got it. Yeah, I just could never imagine Calin talking as as the deal breaker says, talking, uh like crap about you behind your back. But hey, you know, I I relate to Klin. I get cranky when I'm on hold for too long.

To number four talking about X is too much to the point of comparing the two of you, that's a big no note for me. What do you think about that? Yeah? Definitely, what do you think? Yeah, comparing the two of you together, that's weird, Like you shouldn't compare your ex with your current boyfriend and girlfriend. It's just like they're different people. Yeah,

I would be like, read it out. I think I've definitely dated girls before where they like talk about their X a lot and it's like, Okay, are you like over them or like do you want to date me or do you want to date them? Which which one would you prefer? It? Yeah, whenever I went on dates, a lot of people would ask about Ashley, and that's all obviously different because we were dating publicly before you know,

obviously before we're together. But that was always weird to me because it's like, man, I know that it's just like where TV characters, but like that actually is like something very you know, intimate to me. So it's weird to talk about. But I would get obviously would be one of the first questions I get, you know, on dates,

which is understandable. Well, fortunately you didn't have many of those dates, no exactly, because I mean, obviously I was in love with her, so they had every right to ask me about it, right right, and you just didn't get many dates to begin with. Anyways, moving on to the next one doesn't let you have time to yourself for the entire life revolves around you to the point that they suffocate you. Oh this is interesting for you because I feel like you guys are kind of attached

at the hip, are you not. Yeah, We're definitely attached to the hip. That's one of my favorite things about our our relationship is that we truly don't get tired of each other. There's I mean, I really, off the top of my head, can't think of an instance where I thought I need to be away from Ashley for an extended period of time, Like if I need to walk away because you know, we just had a you know,

not an argument, but like a tough conversation. I don't feel like that's something that I need time away from Ashley for more than a few minutes. So I can understand this though, because I have had people in my past who have been very selfocating, and it's extremely annoying because when I'm like, hey, listen, I just need to be by myself right now, they're like, no, no, no, I need to be with you, and You're like no, no, no, no, no no no, Like you don't understand. You make it

it worse. Please, I will talk. We'll talk about it later. Yeah, that's I mean, that's good that you guys are both on the same page about it too. I think that's the most important thing when it comes to that. With uh, With Kaylin, it's I think Kaylin probably is out of all the girls I di did, the most suffocating of them all. But I've never realized that I actually kind of enjoy it. So it's like it's kind of nice. I've always thought like, I don't want it, stay away

from me, I'll you know whatever. But then she like like latches on sometimes. I I went on the Knicks podcast, like right when we started dating Kylin and I and I was like, she's like fell crow She's always sticking to me, and she always and we always give me crap about that. She's like, I'm like, she's like always calling herself my my little bell crowers. I don't know,

something stupid like that. But it's funny because I like, yeah, like I in theory, like in my brain, I like, I'm like I don't like this, but then it's happening and I'm like, okay, cool, this is actually really nice. And then Kitlin is great too, because while she does like to be around me, all the time. She also understands that I'm like, I'm going to go into the mountains for a week, um and I'll be back. And she's like, okay, so she's suffocating, but she also gives

me a very long leash if you will. That seems like a really nice balance. Number six. No testing behavior be straightforward, or I'll assume you're likely to instigate um drauma honesty for honesty. Uh yeah, I think that's pretty I think testing behavior is like pretty immature behavior. You know, what the hell's testing behaviors that like playing games? Um?

I think I interpret testing behavior as something like I'm gonna go flirt with that guy over there to see how you react, or like it, I'm gonna pretend to be a girl texting you sexy pictures to see like if my boyfriend's loyal like that kind of that's kind of how I interpret it to be. Yeah, that's messed up. That's like a toxic relationship, and that's like toxic. I agree, toxic. You know, astrology is one of those things where you do you but if you really believe that stuff, you

and I are likely not a match. I read a horoscope for entertainment at times, but I don't blame my behavior or assess my compatibility with someone based on the random month I was born. And so this person is saying if there date looks to the stars for personality traits, not not for them. What do you think? I think think that If it's like kind of jokey, that's fine. But if they're a serious saying I can't date you because I'm meant to data Pisces and you're a Scorpio. Yeah,

look cucko. Yeah. Or it's like when they're they're blaming their bad behavior on like the cycle of the moon. That's pretty ridiculous. Yeah, I agree. The moon is a waxing gimbus, so I you know, I get a little testy during this time. Yeah, you should just Calin should start saying that when she's on hold for too long, it's not me, it's the moon. Deep mercuries and retrogade, can't you see? Um? If they're terrible with finances is a big one for this person, which, yeah, I mean

I could see that. I gotta admit it's so sexy knowing that Calin makes so much more money than me. It's like such a turn on for me. Is that is that weird. Uh No, that's not weird. I think this probably is talking. This person is specifically talking about not how much money they make, but how much money they spend, which obviously is is a conversation. Yeah, you have to have as a couple. But you know what Andrea three thousand says, it's not how much you make,

it's how much you spent. Ah, Well, if Andrea three thousands said it, yeah, I guess I mean that makes sense. Especially look if you're buying silly, silly things. Yeah, but like you guys have a baby on the way, so there's you guys got a lot of finances to consider. Otherwise, Well, I'm lucky that Ashley and I are very much on

the same page about finances. We discussed it. We just have a very comfortable relationship and we talk about our finances, and like I'll always ask her, like if I buy a new golf polo, I swear to God, bro I wanted to buy this new golf polo for like two weeks straight. It's company called bad Bertie. I loved it so much and I went into the store. I called Ashleys said, should I get this polo? Because there's seventy dollars and she's like, you don't need it, you have

so many shirts. You're fine. I'm like, nope, you're right, you're right right. So then I kept thinking about it from the next week, and then we drove past the store and I goes, oh, that's where the polo was, and she's like, pull over and get it. She's like, if you're still thinking about it after a week, get the polo, and I said, okay. So I got the polo and I love it. I like those shirts. It's

just I wish there was more variety with them. They're they're They've got like four patterns, the bad birdy shirts, and I like them. And the fabric is really nice and I'm sure you look dashing in it. I like it. Yeah, I wore I like it so much. I wore yesterday for our gender reveal because I got it. It's a blue and pink one, so it actually worked out well, Oh nice, what's it going to be blue or pink? Yeah? Yeah. Kaitlin and I are biggest financial gripe is She likes

to fly business class and I strictly fly economy. I don't care whether I'm sitting in the back of the airplane or the front of the airplane, and the airplanes in the air and it gets to where we need to go. Don't spend the extra thousand dollars to fly business class. It's not worth thousand dollars, holy crap, whatever it is. I don't know. It could be five, could

be two thousand. She like insists always on upgrading to business or first class, and I, like, I have to struggle with arguing with her about how it's an unnecessary spend of money. Yeah, I when we bounce back and forth from Virginia, I don't care, like you know, but last oh, near the bathroom whatever. I was the economy.

But when when we go from like l A to Boston and then we're in the air for six hours, sometimes like we'll we'll do a deep dive search to see how much more first class is, because sometimes you can get a really good deal and it's like an extra two for first class. But that's well worth it for six hour flight, but not for an hour flight. I agree, And so Kayle and I are going to Europe next week. And I was kind of one of

the big arguments, not arguments, but like debates. She's like well, we could spend eight more and we're in uh comfort plus, and I'm like, okay, it's just not worth it. And then I was like, I thought we decided on it. And then she comes back a couple of days later and she's like, well, yeah, well the upgrade is only a couple extra hundrells and like, no, we've already decided we're flying economy. It's happening this way. All right, let's get a couple more because so who won who won

that argument? We're flying economy gear She's gonna be so cranky that entire flight. So we're flying economy, but I'm going to stay there a couple extra days to meet up with one of my friends. So she's flying back solo. And I would be willing to stake a lot of money on the fact that she's going to fly business or first class back because she's doing that for herself rather than for both of us, you know what I mean? No, that makes sense. Um, all right, let's see, we've got

a couple more here. They spend their free time sitting on their phone, but get annoyed when I play a few hours of PlayStation to relax. Dude, I can relate to this so hard. Ashley is on her phone constantly. She's out. She just poked her head and I'm sure she's gonna pull her head back in to yell at me for saying this. She's on her phone. We're both on our phones because we work a lot on our

phones obviously. But then she'll put her phone down and I'll be on my phone, and then she'll have the guts to look at me and say, you're always on your phone. I'm like, oh, here we go, here we go. She just puts her phone down, and then I stay on my phone for like an extra twenty minutes and she looks at me and says, I'm always on my phone. Or then she'll be on her phone. Like last night, good example, We're sitting on the couch. She's got a post like I already posted, did my thing. So I'm

just watching TV. It's like nine o'clock at night. I know I'm gonna have to take the dog out an hour, so I'm like, oh, I'm gonna go play a video game. And she's like why, and I'm like, well, I'm gonna just go play a game in Madden and you're on your phone and she's like, and I'm like, you're on your phone. Don't get mad at me because I want to play a video game. Okay, I agree. Anyway, as you can see, I'm very passionate about this. I see

that this list is supposed to be deal breakers. That's obviously not a deal breaker for you, nor should it be. This guy seems to be even more And this guy definitely like is dating this girl? Right, this person that wrote this, I would say, I agree with you, Like, especially in the height of the pandemic, I was probably playing like six hours of Call of Duty a day, you know, because it's like, what else am I supposed to do? I'm not I can't go outside, i can't

leave the house. I'm supposed to hang out with my girlfriend. Screw that exactly never And Caylin was like, she was like super cool with that at first, but but then by like the second week, she was like, dude, you play so much video games. And I'm like, well, if I wasn't playing video games, what would I be doing?

Watching TV with you? Which is not a bad thing, don't get me wrong, but like watching TV and playing video games, Comparing those two, playing video games is the superior option, because at least you're like interacting with the TV instead of just sitting there mindlessly watching you know, Real Housewives of Dallas or something like that, which, again not bashing because those shows are entertaining and I do love just snuggling up and watching TV with Kalin, but

they're there there. I don't know, it's just like you need some variety. Yeah, And I just it's so weird how it seems like girls just don't seem to understand why boys love video games so much. They're so fun. Oh, there's so much fun. One of my favorite jokes of all time is Dane Cook's joke about a video games because he said he moved into his house with his girlfriend and he was playing a video game and she was like, oh, why do you even like doing that?

Video games are stupid? And you look back at her and he's like, you better get used to stupid because stupid loves here. Um, all right, well i'll do it for the dating deal breakers. Let us know what your deal breakers are. Email us, uh, either email us, follow us, caption comment like do all that stuff. I don't even know what I was gonna say. Caption you can caption our stuff too. Where can the email us? Do you remember the email for the podcast? Yes it is no

no no no no no no, I know it. I know. Okay, you can email us at I Suck at Dating at I heart media dot com. That is, I Suck at Dating at I heart media dot com. Thank you Hannah for putting that into the rundown. Uh, let us know your deal deal breakers, we want to hear him. We're gonna take a quick break, but right afterwards we're gonna go to your listener question and answers and then of course answer an email. Hello everyone, welcome back to help

I Suck at podcast at Dating. We are going to get We're gonna get into listener Q and a s that we had you guys submit on our Instagram page just a couple of days ago. I think, um, if you don't already follow us on Instagram, help Underscore I Underscore suck Underscore at Underscore Dating, help by SECUD Dating, Underscores of Spaces, shoot us a follow because Jared is superactive on it and you're not gonna want to miss

any sweet help by secud Dating Updates. So Jared, question submitted for you, Jared, are you and actually doing anything to keep the marriage spicy during pregnancy, not as of yet, uh age. I mean, honestly, we haven't had much into the past few months, a couple of months, just because of how bad Ashley has been feeling. I mean she's been thrown up daily and been pretty sick and not feeling her best. And uh, it's it's been fine. You know.

We just you know, you prioritize things, and uh, I'm sure we will over the next you know, weeks or months, Uh, you know, work on things to spice things up. It was actually really funny, not to like get too gross into it, but obviously when a woman is pregnant, her body starts changing. And uh, I'm sure she doesn't mind me sharing this. I touched her nipples yesterday. Dude, They're like weird. She was telling me about it because she she Ashley wants to show me pictures because like they

just like get huge and like they're big. They've gotten like very big and apparently not nearly as big as some other women have to go through. But it's just like crazy, you know what I mean when you say big, like the ariola is expanding, or like the nipple part is getting longer. Both the nipple parts long, and I mean I'll ask her. Hopefully she doesn't mind me saying this. The podcast actually loves over sharing. It's great. It's part of what makes her so um endearing. She no, that's

what I said. Comparably speaking, nothing all right, well, comparably speaking, apparently they're nothing, but they're still pretty long. Let's just be clear. I don't have gigantic areas. She does not have gigantic ariolas. That is what I don't want anybody imagining that. Okay, nobody's imagining that. We just want to set the record straight on this. No, gigantic areal is just a little very pointing. But they're definitely pointer than I'm used to. So when I touched them, Mr, And

I was like, holy crap. I just didn't expect it because I haven't, like, you know, taking a detailed look at him lately. And uh, it was quite kind of funny. But no, I'm sure to answer your question. Wow, I'm very much oversharing. I'm sure over the next couple months we will do things to spice things up, like some nipple play. Uh. And I think at the end of the day, to comparatively to other people. Maybe not huge, but relative to how they're they used to be, you've

noticed some significant growth. So I think you're you're justified and talking about your wife's nipples like that. I love my wife's nipples. Yeah, that's great, and now there's more of them to love. Uh So, Dean, let me ask a question for you, Um, Dean, do you think Calin is your soul mate? And if yes or no, do you believe in soulmates? I don't know if I really believe in soul mates. I we've talked about this on the podcast a while ago. I like, I was curious

about it. I was like, I wonder if Calen thinks I'm her soul mate? So I texted her. She says, yes, I would I would say yes, but with an ASTERIXX of saying I don't really believe in soul mates. So that makes no sense. Caitlin is my soul mate, I just don't believe in him. If soul mates are a thing, I would say, yeah, she's my solmmate. Well that's a very sweet answer. I don't believe silmmates are real. So I say, now she thinks that we're sol mates? And

all right, appreciating that al right, next one for you. Well, it's a nice it's a nice answer. It's gonna be a nicer um, Jared, does actually have a limit on how long you'll grow your hair? Uh? Yeah, I don't think she wants it any longer than it is right now. I actually just got a trim, but it's still not that sure. I am going to cut it short, probably sometime over the winter, maybe early next year, somewhere around there. Go back to like the length I had at the wedding.

Does she have any input on the length? Though she likes this length, She likes this length a lot, she doesn't want it pretty much any longer than this, you know, Like like I stated before, Tom cruise a mission possible too. That's like the longest it's going to get. But I like the long hair. I uh, it's just like, as you know, man, it's just like, especially in this heat, holy crap, it's like a mop on your head. I don't know how a lot of people with long hair do it, but I do miss my short hair at

times as well. So I'm I'm excited to cut my hair short, but I also know once I do, I'm going to immediately regret it. Hair is so funny because like, I'll like go back through old pictures and I'll see myself with short hair and I'm like, wow, I was so much more handsome with short hair. And then I'll go back further to where my hair was even longer than it is now, and I was like, man, I was so much more handsome with that long, long hair.

It's like, it doesn't make any sense. I don't understand any of Like so pretty much you're just saying you're always handsome. Oh I'm so handsome. I just think I think in the present moment that I'm always in, I'm like, I'm the least attractive version of myself, and for some reason, I look back at old pictures and I'm like, wow, you're so much better looking back then, especially better looking

than you are now, you know what I mean. And I'm sure like in a year, I'm going to look back on a picture that I took of myself yesterday and be like, wow, dude, you were so much more handsome in Montana when you recorded that podcast and your brothers truck in the parking lot of a breakfast diner. But who knows. I think obviously you're peaking right now, but your second highest peak was definitely right around the

last paradise you were on with Kaylin. I love you're so consistent with us walking onto the beach and the all black outfit, because at the wedding you look great too. But dude, when you walk down those stairs, both I'll never forget. Ashley and I looked at each other and was like, like, I dare Kylin to not leave with this guy. I dare her to try. That's funny, because

you know, I didn't feel cute in that moment. I remember that moment so specifically because I like wanted my hair to be nice, and you know how like, especially when you have long hair, you want to like shampoo it and condition it like a day or two before. You want people like before it looks it's best, right, so you kind of like get like prepare a couple

of days in advance. And I remember, like I think in the hotel I was staying in, there was no conditioner or something like that, and so I couldn't condition my hair, and I was like, Ah, this is gonna suck. I'm gonna walk down there and my hair is gonna be all greasy and gross and I remember that day like I was like trying to like style it appropriately.

They wouldn't let me wear my head band, which I was wearing all season because I was in like a weird, awkward stage and I was like, oh, my hair is just not going to be good. But then it looked good on camera. I think there was like some editing or something involved, because it did look pretty good. Yeah, Oh, it looked amazing. I don't think it was editing. I think it was just the glow. All right, we'll do one more question before we go into our email. Uh,

this is for both of us. Would you rather be stuck in a room with your significant other? Or wait? Wait, would you rather be stuck in a room with your significant other or with your celebrity crush? My significantly hold on sorry, because it says would you rather be stuck in a room with your significant other with your ex or celebrity crush? Oh how is that even a question?

Of course, my significant other with your X. So it would be like you, actually you Ashley and Kayla like in a room together, or you and Penelope Cruz, Well, Penelope Cruises and my my crush. I mean, she's very attractive, who is. Jennifer Lopez was my crush for quite some time still is obviously, I would say Rachel, Well, Rachel McAdams was a big crush. Emma Stone was a big crush. Like all very basic answers, who's yours, I'm gonna try

to think of a better one. Um, my celebrity crush, I mean Galgant dots up there, obviously, Yeah, she's cool. I think my celebrity crush. I'm gonna get in trouble for saying this. I guess it's like. The only only non photographer celebrity that I follow on Instagram is Alexis Wren, So I would say that's my celebrity crush. Alexis Wren. Who's that? She's just like some girl I'm gonna go and follow right now. I feel guilty about it actually, to be honest, Well, is she like? Who is this

human being? Oh? She's ford seen the blonde? She was like, I'm dancing with the stars. She used to day. J Aubreds, who I also followed, who I've also been meaning to unfollowed because he's just like weird? Is it this person? Yeah? That was my celebrity crush and Caitlyn could confirm that too, But like I said, I'm going I'm going through with the unfollowing right this, Yeah, unfollowed. We don't need that. Hey, I well, I kind of wanted to resent brought this

question up. Ash. Would you rather be stuck in a room with me or leonarder A DiCaprio You had to choose one? Are you serious? Wow? That's so sweet. She said she'd rather be stuck in a room with me rather than Leo. Ash, You're so sweet, I said, you too, and no, I did. All right, Well, let's get into an email before we head, added, I want to answer this. You didn't ask me any of the other other questions. I want to answer this first one to read that

one for me? How does Dean deal with differences of religion with Calin? And how would work with your kids if you guys have kids. You were holding that one, and I think that you were doing it because you thought I didn't want to answer it. But I do want to answer it, and I'm going to answer it right now. We have different takes on religion. Calin and I obviously I am agnostic more or less raised Presbyterian since transitioned into agnosticism. So I don't really believe in anything.

I don't disbelieve in anything, but I'm just kind of like convinced me. Like if something came down and they were like, Okay, like this is real, here's proof, I'd like, Okay, cool, that makes sense, I believe. Now. Calin is pretty Christian. She goes to church pretty often. She's got like her uh religious texts that she has around, like she writes, you know, her daily prayers and all that kind of stuff.

And I think that there is probably a growing number of these like inter faith or lack there of relationships, And that's kind of why I wanted to answer it. Um. I think the biggest thing is just like openness to talk about it a and like an understanding that just because you think something different than the other person doesn't mean the other person is more wrong or less right

than you are, you know what I mean. So, like when it comes to religion, Caitlin and I I like support her religion and like her religious efforts and all that kind of stuff. And I think, at the end of the day, like she's not throwing it in my face, Like she's not like throwing Christianity in my face, and as long as she's not doing that, I totally don't care. Like she can do whatever she wants, she can believe

whatever she wants. I like to press her on a couple of certain things, you know, like factual reasonings as to like why things are the way that they are, especially when it comes to religious texts. I'll press her on it, just like to a gain clarity for myself, and I like him, just curious to see like what she has to say about a lot of that stuff. And so she is always going to be Christian and I love that, and I think that she definitely should and if we have kids, I I guess right. We

have never really talked about that. Yeah, because that that was my next question. Because obviously it's fine that you guys can say, hey, I believe this, I believe that, and we can live and love each other of that. But then how do you do the kids. What are you going to do with your with little baby Dean? Well, once a little baby Dean comes into the world in February. Uh, we haven't really talked about it. Ashley and I think are both very similar on our religious beliefs. Um it's

not a big factor in our lives. Um. You know, we don't go to church. Um. I think both of us like to believe in a higher power, but we definitely are also agnostic to a you know, a certain extent. You know, I think we both believe that something is there, we just don't know what it is. So, UM, I think that's how we're going to kind of raise our kids. And you know, I'm You're going to introduce our kids

to a lot of different ideas and and beliefs. And I want them to be exposed to a bunch of different ideas and and you know we'll we'll well, we'll work together as a family through it. You grew up Catholic, right, so you like went to church every Sunday with your parents. No, I mean we would go to church occasionally. We were not good churchgoers. Uh. So that's why it was never really like a huge factor in my life. We always believed in the presence of God and and to a

certain extent, I do now today, um, because I want to. Um, But I also realized that you know, there might not be But you know, I choose to believe, uh in a higher power because I want to. I'll take your opinion on this. Then let's say Kylin and I have a kid and she wants to take it to church, take it as if it's just a thing. She wants to take the kid to church to like instill some religious values in it at a young age. But I

don't and I don't care about it. So would you say that, like, just them too, you should go to church and I stay home? Or should I be supportive and go with them all even though I don't believe in it? You know what I mean? Like, what would you advise someone like someone in my situation, and that's

to do well? I would say that you should go with them and explain things, you know, because I think probably one of the reasons why you're agnostic is as you grow older, things are more explained to you, and I think then you look through a different lens at certain things in your life. And so I think if you wanted to just you know, give your child as much knowledge as possible to let them make the best decision,

then I would go with them. I wouldn't like just be like, oh, you do whatever you want to do and then we're not going to talk about it. I think the best course would be you to join them, because like, if you're agnostic, then you don't really care about going to church. Like you can go, you can go and take it. Wake up early on Sunday and freaking drive to the church and sit through the family trip.

You get some coffee on the way. I mean, honestly, of course, each family needs to decide what's best for themselves. But if you're asking for my advice, that would be my advice. Yeah, that's good advice. That's good advice. And if it's on a Sunday, hey, maybe I can sneak my phone in and watch some some NFL read Zone or something. Well, of this sermon is going on. Anyways, we are going to get to one quick email and then we are gonna let you guys get the heck

out of here, because I'm sick of sitting in this truck. Um. The email is this from chat? Do you have anyone out there that wants to read this? Anyone in the podcasting universe that wants to read this. I'll read it if you're if you yeah, I haven't read in a while. Um okay, Hi Miames Eastern And this is an email from Chad. A couple of months ago. I slept with one of my family friends. The family is literally my second family. We spent all major holidays together, we go

on vacations. She has four years younger than me, and it's like my little sister. I have never thought of her as attractive and this was just a drunk mistake. I am now super nervous and anxious about being around her family, and I hope no one ever finds out. How do I not act awkward when I see her? Help? Damn? Wow? Wow, So you hooked up with your little sister. That's that's dude, Thank you the sweeth holme Alabama music. Oh god, d If you sleep with someone, please don't ever describe them

as then as a little sister. Like what the hell? Man? I so god, I don't know. This is just weird and I've never thought of her as attractive, and this was a drunk mistake. I just I guess. Okay, let's let's start by saying this, Hey, she never needs to know that you don't find her attractive and be that you think it was a drunken mistake. Those things should never leave your mouth again when it comes to talking

about this, especially with her. Yeah, you just just freaking go talk to her and say, hey, that was great, but we never are going to do it again. That's what I would say. And if we and like maybe throw in like and also if we could like kind of keep it a seak, great, that would be really great. Um, I don't know, that's my advice. What do you think? I don't know. There's there has to be more than that that has to happen. But uh, Bob, yeah, I

don't know. This one kind of stumps me. I just think, like, yeah, go talk to her. Hopefully the family doesn't find out. Hopefully you guys can move on. Talk to her. That's important. But don't say it was a drink mistake and I don't find you attractive. Yeah, definitely don't say that. Just say hey, it was you know, one night. I'm not sure if we should do this again. You know, it's complicated his situation. Uh yeah, I got nothing. It's just

like so awkward. I got nothing for you on this one. Sorry, Chad. You can drop from experience on this one, can't you, Obviously? I mean I haven't. I haven't slept for like a close family friend like that, And I have not regretted anyone I've ever had sex with every sex is a gift that should be cherished and treasured. Beautiful, beautiful, But damn, I think I agree with you guys, So you gotta say, uh, hey,

that was fun. Uh. You know, I wouldn't expect it to happen again because of the the complexities around our relationship and how we know each other. Um. I very much treasure you as a friend and I would like to continue that friendship. And if it were me, I would want to be Uh, I would probably want to distance myself from this person for a while. Yeah, maybe don't go to the family parties for a little while. Yeah, yeah, I mean, you know, I don't know. I don't know

how old Chad is. But like you know, I don't know how often these events are happening these days. But yeah, I would maybe sit out the next barbecue or two and uh and uh. But but you know, have a conversation whether he and be honest, because you don't want her to feel like like, oh, hey we did this and then he just like disappeared. What happened? Um, But yeah, don't don't say that you don't find a attractive and

then it was a mistake. That's good advice to not let that leave your mouth, right I I agree with your take. The complexities thing really sold me. You are a man with a very great vocabulary. Thank you, Thank you where economy is important to me? All Right? I think that's gonna do it. On this week's episode of Help I Suck at Dating, Eastan, thank you so much for reading that email, and thank you Chad for us

where does that email was? Thank you for setting in Wishing you the best of luck with that buddy, and please keep emailing us. Everybody listening. We love your emails. It's Dean's favorite part of the podcast. It is legitimately the only reason he sticks around. I Suck at Dating at i heeart media dot com. You can also follow us at help I Suck at Dating on Instagram. Thank you to everybody who chimed in for the questions on Instagram. Thank you Alex Rodriguez for posting a dumb picture so

we can talk about it. Uh, And I think that's gonna do it. So what can they do next week? Deean, Oh my gosh, they could tune in because Jared, we might just suck a little bit less. Follow help by Suck at Dating on I Heart Radio or wherever you listen a podcast m HM