#23 Big Time Dating

and it's starting to get like creepy. Yeah, that's that's her side of the story. That's adorable. So she's been stalking me now for what five or six years? Um, actually, somehow now has a job working with me for the first time. I'm I'm pretty highly concerned, but I'm gonna shove that way down for this here podcast and we'll talk about that later. No, it's great. So Christine is like my little sister, and I'm so happy that you're you're killing it. I'm happy to see you here. I'm

doing okay, I'm doing all right. We're a pretty fancy studio. We're actually talking about the niceties microphones, are you know? It's a nice studio in a successful world and podcast when the microphones are what gold plated, bronze plated, or in an actual studio, not in somebody's kitchen, which is still step up from somebody's basements. I don't know why I made that creepy, but I just imagined a much, much worse scenario exactly. All right, So this is fun.

You know, of all the things I've spoken about, I've never really gotten into my dating life, but of all the times in my world, this is a really good time to talk about it. Because I went from thinking I would be perpetually single in this crazy town of Los Angeles, and I was single for better part of four years. Yeah, and not just single, I mean like aggressively single, like super single, and those are core years,

your years to be single. I think that everybody at all sincerity like your twenties are your time to be selfish. And I mean in the best of ways, because when you get older, you only inevitably have more responsibility and less opportunity to be selfish. And what I don't want to be is that old dude in a relationship, serious relationship that decides then, oh now is my time to be selfish? No, I'd rather get it out of my system. And boy, I got a lot out of my system.

And recently I met uh, I met my girlfriend. Also, let's not use that term too much. It is a fair term, but it's new to me kind of scary. Um. But her name is Gabby and she's great and let's move on. Who woa whoa wa wa wa move on. How have you used the word girlfriend with her? Well, yeah, I'm not gonna just drop it here. First, listen to the show gabs it. Yeah, it was. We hadn't used it. We started dating like maybe two months. I really didn't know where it's going, but I kind of fell into

dating right before it did Celebrity Big Brother. And then after like six weeks two months of kind of dating, just disappeared for a month, which she reminds me of pretty much every day. And that was actually a great litmus test because both of us thought about each other every day and when we came out, were like, sorry, we didn't have this conversation before, but I really want to date you. Let's make this official. And it was super sweet and it's going well. And how did you

meet her in the first place? Through my friend Francesca. Props to Franny, thanks for that one. Oh a big time. I had a music video release party. Actually it was for my song who Knows, and I just on a really cool music video and so why not, you know, excuse throw a little party and went out to I think Delilah for drinks afterwards. Like the most l A story, It's actually not the most l A story, so I'm

not talking about being like on dating app. We actually met in person friends, so we did go to the most l A spot in the world. Though after I look, I'm a musician, I'm allowed have a music video. It's like I live in l A too, so stop it, stop it, stalker. And uh, anyways, frances just randomly hit me up. I invited her out to come join and she brought Gabby and the rest is history. And uh, what was your first date? My first date? Uh after that was actually going and meeting her for tea. Oh

tea is a nice first. It was early evening. It was super early evening. Yeah, it was early evening tea. I think I had an early morning and also just wasn't sure that I wanted to commit to like a full fledged dinner as I think that's smart. A lot of people say that you gotta coffee, drinks, tea something,

so there's an exit plan if necessary. Yeah, and also to make sure that you can, you know, have a great conversation, you know, because we met over a few drinks, and funny enough, we met kind of talking about how sloppy another person in our group was, and it was just funny thing we're kind of talking, didn't know each other, and it was after maybe five or tenminous conversation we kind of look at each other like, you're really attractive.

Started enjoying this conversation with this friend of a friend, think it would be super casual, and then eventually was like I enjoy lots of things about this and kept going. So I think the next the coffee tea was like to make sure that that was real, and turns out it was. And did the tea day extend from there? Did you go get food? Did? Or did you exuly? Just to keep it cool? Chapter cool? It went on

for longer than expect did? We hung out for maybe a couple of hours when like a cute little walk and I dropped her off and I thought, you know what, I don't want to ruin a good thing. Let's see if this is good yet another time and space it out. So took it far more slow than I have anything in a long time, and I think it's part of the reason that it's it's working. Have you met her parents? Have not yet? Have not, so that'll be uh, that'll be a good steps still coming, but that's good. We're

glad you're happy. It's not rush, but that's kind of marked things. So, yeah, we're planning a future with kids. No off my list. Then what kind of relationship advice do you adhere to have you been given in your life that you've really found connected and that you used to this day. Yes, it depends on what type of relationship you're looking for, because a lot of my buddies have asked me a lot of dating questions, but it's more about like, hey, how do we just met a

girl at a bar? And I think it depends on what you're looking for. If you if you want to just go and meet somebody and have fun, to have drinks, like, okay, there's a way to do it without being a douche. Honestly, there's a way to talk to somebody by just talking to him. Don't start with a pickup line, just say hi, like if you if anything, like hey, if they're out drinking,

can offer to be played by somebody a drink. But when it comes actually dating someone, which once again is a little bit not that I haven't ever dated somebody's just been a while, I think it really is back to communication. And so from the very get go, we couldn't have been more blunt and honest about our previous relationships, why it didn't work, what we would expect moving forward, and we just kept aligning with with our thoughts and our morals and how we wanted things to work out.

So it almost started as like a joke because we were so honest. But now we have this open line of communication which is really awesome. So I know it's it's a bit cliche, but you really have to tell people how you feel when you feel it, and not just let things pent up and become a fight, because if you're fighting, I don't care how long the relationship has been, like, there's just no reason for it. There's

no excuse. So I think it's just a slippery slope, you know, I mean, because you fight once and it's just the first time, and then your second is on your second time, and eventually you're like that a couple that fights. I never want to do that. So honestly, it's openness. It's um talking about your exit. That's an interesting thing because some people would say to stay away from that, I think, but it's part of your past, it's part of who you are. I mean, maybe don't

go in depth about it every time you go to dinner. Sure, I could get awkward, but I think if you don't ever cross those off the list of things that you know about the person, then inevitably you're gonna be out with their friends and they're gonna reference something, right, They're gonna reference their friends passed, which is just relationship, and all of a sudden you're the only person in the dark and you're the one dating that person. Yeah. That's uncomfortable. Yeah,

and I think better to just know. So I think you kind of just have to have those conversations and you can call it a day after that. But if you never do, then it's gonna come up in a way. I think that's gonna build up anxiety at the very least. Sure, you mentioned going up and meeting people, approaching people, you're interested in. And we've had a lot of talk about this lately, Tanya, especially if you know Tanya rad she knows you. I don't know. She introduced it that I heard.

She lives large on all these podcasts where she she's in the room or not. She tried something recently. She approached to got a grocery store and asked him what his cologne was because she wanted something for her brother to get a dialogue and actually wanted for her brother. Yeah, I was just to get a dialogue going, so she lied. She lied didn't work anyway because she just he just told her and moved on. He didn't continue the conversation.

She had another one she wants to try. Yeah, so her friend Becca and if anyone listens to scrubbing in with Becca Tilly, you know this story. Becca was talking to a hockey player on a dating app. The conversation seemed a little shady, like maybe it sounds about right really the hockey player, so she finds the hockey players Instagram and DM Someone says, am I talking to you on this dating app? Or am I being catfished right now?

And the hockey player said, you're being catfished? I'm not on that app, but now they're talking, So Tanya wants to approach you. Guys, just make that and say, hey, am I talking to you? Or am I being catfish? Just to get I can't wait till that doesn't work either in the responses like I don't know we're talking, like he really is on the app and he's just a creeper. Sorry, I'm not projecting to Sania how it

works out for you. But so so, if a woman wanted to approach you, obviously, now you're in a relationship that's off lim with but six months ago, what is the best way for a woman to approach a guy that she's interested in? I think human being there's no secret to it, guys, there's no like, hey say this line, or hey, like, well maybe first of all, don't start by lying TONI um just say hi. You know what

I mean? It can be It can be very attractive when the same thing I was saying earlier, like, hey, if you're out at a bar and you meet somebody, often then buy them a drink. Women can do the same thing, especially in today's day and age, and I think it can be attractive when you do it in a confident, cool way. I mean, part of it is not attracted to Gabby is because she has her own world going on, her own career, you know, I mean

she makes her own money. Now, I sot offer to pay for everything, but then sometimes she just jump in and grab coffees, grab drinks, which is awesome, you know what I mean. And I don't think you should ever be to one sided. I still I'm a gentleman, will always offer to pay and never have a problem with it. But it's attractive when you have that confidence. Was a woman is the same thing. Just go up, say hi, introduce yourself. Smile. I'm attracted to a smile first and foremost.

I know it sounds scary, but it's scary for us two girls, it really is. But like what, Hi, I America, and then what they're like cool by then that's your answer the dude and fantastic you've moved on. Okay, okay, Hi America. You'd say Hi, I'm James, and then you say oh, and then you talk, You talk like normal normal people. Yeah, Hey, I'm here with my friends. You guys want to come join us? Or hey, can we get you around a drink? So whatever it is, I mean, look,

group setting are always easiest. It's definitely better than like being solo. I guess which because that's a social setting. Yeah, that's a's a personal problem. I think we get a lot of emails from people think, can I should I ask this guy out? Should I approach him? Should I call him? Should I text him? And we always say yes, you have nothing to lose because you need to find out what's going on, if there's anything there and if there's not. Now, you know, I just don't see the

downside to it. I know it's nerve racking, but guys these days are not being as aggressive as they used to be. They're not asking as much as they used to, so somebody has to well, of course, and I think more than ever, you know what I mean, people are unclear where the lines are and should be, you know what I mean. And I think it's fair people afraid to go up and say hi sometimes, especially as a

guy these days. So as a girl there's all that more opportunity, you know, and the end of the day kind of addressing that, it's like silly you can you can flirt with anybody one time and if they reciprocate it that's flirting. If they don't stop, it's pretty much as simple as that. But you can complient somebody, Hey, I think you're beautiful, gonna do this, and if they don't reciprocate it, maybe don't keep complimenting. I think you're

kind of done, but you just try it. And I think that's less scary doing it in person and knowing one way or the other this is I gonna move forward or be done within five seconds. Then the idea of being on an app and like essentially blind dating somebody every time you meet up to me, that would inspire far more trepidation than just meeting somebody in person and going hey and sing if there's any chemistry at all, it's quicker, it's more efficient. Give it a try, real

life guys, Try it out spoken by someone, right. I think I have a little bit more credibility to this now. I love it. Can we talk about celebrity Big Brother for a minute? Oh? We sure can. I've heard of that show. You were on there and you actually give it a run left episode? Yeah, I made it pretty much all the way to the end. And you know, look, I think had I changed my tactics and started making alliances like with Omarosa for example, I could have stayed in and maybe one, but to me, I had such

a good run. It was very important to me to come out in an interesting environment, one that is incredibly for to me, a reality TV show that at that, and remain um, a class act as best as I can come out being a gentleman, which to me is kind of my version of being unscathed in what could be, you know, a really catty situation. So I think of getting out when I did was actually a pretty big

win for me. Like I said, winning it could have been fun, but hey, I was the biggest target in the house from day one, almost an even the show will admit it, and that basically inspired the idea like, well, if I can turn this, if I cannot be out first, I can probably stay a long time. That was basically my tactic throughout it. And it worked and it was fun and I'm glad to be home. Would you do it again? Like it was with that kind of a

one time experience? Most likely a one time experience, um, but I'm always open minded, you know, if they came back and it was a different situation or an all star cast, and I had the time. You just never know, but most likely that was what it was. And uh, we'll leave it at that. What was the worst part of it? I feel like there's to me that would be a long lift. If the camera seven, there's certain people who don't get along with, but you're with constantly,

you're having no son. As strange as that may sun the regular Big Brother cast, Yes, it's three times as long, but they have a huge backyard and they have the sun. And I'm I'm an outdoor dog. I'm a beach boy. I live in the beach. I grew up in San Diego, and so I didn't really realize how important just being outside was to me. So I spent a month on the sound stage where we had a tiny little backyard. We don't get it at nights, and it was covered. We'd never see the sun. That might have been the

hardest part. Wow, that's interesting. Who did you get close the cat? I mean, look, especially at the beginning, it was kind of the boys hanging with the boys, and so hanging out with Mark McGrath, who had you know, race cars with before, actually came much closer. He's such a good guy. Meta world piece is Buddy to this day. He's the nicest, biggest teddy bear in the world, has

the craziest stories. You know, from being one of the NBA's gnarliest defenders ever so then changing his name to Meta world Peace and being like this big sweetheart than like you know sometimes. I mean, look, it's the funniest situation. He's great. Um Chocolate was my boy before, but then became close with Channon. She's awesome, incredibly intelligent. Omar Rossa is one of the most interesting people I've ever met. I mean, Marissa was just texting me actually funny. Have

clips of celebrity Big Broad yesterday. Just spend a lot of time with these people. So I became close with most of the cast. Frankly, man of you kept in touch with you said meadow world Pace. You're still in touch with him. Yeah. We're supposed to go to a Lakers game next week, which I'm pretty excited. Guys. I'm not gonna lie. I can't one of the best players in the game at that, you know what I mean,

So that'll be a lot of fun. Met if you're listening, don't forget our plans to go to that Laker game. Offer and you get used to the cameras after a while because they can't imagine that cameras they aren't bad, right, even when you're asleep, there's a camera here, we look they're they're basically two way mirrors. So you don't see the cameras. You see some of them in the hallways,

but you don't see the majority of them. And said you see reflection of yourself, So you become really vain until you remember, like as you're picking that they get your teeth. You gotta dude on your de side, most

likely just staring you down. So no, I always pretty keenly aware that they were there at all times, because you know, as much as I was myself and dropped my guard to a point, there's always going to be a bit me that's reserved when I'm on camera, even in a situation like that, because you want to keep a little bit of yourself to yourself. That makes sense. And you and Brandy butted heads. But would you say you didn't get as close with her or that was

at all water under the bridge. No, I think it's fair insane didn't get as close with Brandy. Speaking about being reserved, um, that was one of the biggest reasons that I had to play docile if you will, because I did had I had no intention of engaging with a reality star like that. She was really the only one. I guess Omarosa in a different way, the only that came from a reality platform, which I've never understood. I've never really watched, and I have no intention of being

and I'm my My career is just different. I grew up training to be an actor. Still, that's what I do to sing, That's what I do. Those are my careers already do enough. Don't need to add being catty on reality television over stupid things to that list, quite frankly. So I'm happy for her that she's created a career out of that, because that's such a unique thing to be able to do. It's just not my cup of tea.

When you're a real house if your skill is to create drama and create interesting television, and you could easily get sucked into that. Yeah, I think interesting television might be where we differ an opinion, but yet to create something to just create a big old mess at an absolutely nothing for no reason. Um, that's what they don't know, if I can say they that's what she does, and she's good at that. I never want to be good at that. And that's the nicest way I can put it,

because it was pretty annoying. I mean, she was just poke and poke and poke and prime prian prior and she's a freaking adult and I had to be the adult in the situation every single time, which is fine. I'm twenty seven years old. I don't want to be the adult in every situation, but in that case, no problem. The example I want to set to my fans and people who look up to me is that that's not what you do. If you have a problem, talk about it and don't instigate things for the sake of doing it.

I really I was bullied as a kid. I will always stand up to bullies. And the best way to stand up to a bully like that is, you know, just to not engage. We'll cool, cool, I guess it's. Having said all that, if I saw Brandy, I'd give her a hug. And you know, we've been out with some of the casts and had some drinks, and she's she is who she is through and through, and that's where like that, That's who she is, and I'm accepting it. To a point, you know what I mean. So that's

that's that. There we go. Yeah, that's the Brandy chet Erica here has a date tonight. Yeah. I was like, where are we going with this? So this is any harmony days? Yes, And that's totally. I mean I just hate the you were like the blind dating every time you go out thing like that's where I have like my reservations on going. But I mean I think it'll be good. How long have you guys been talking texting the harmony about a week or so? Um? What drew you to him in the first Fine, I'm not even sure.

Well we were like matched, and so why did you choose him? I think I just was like, sure, he looks nice, right you look at your first and he's like he's handsome. Yeah, he went to a college that I almost went to l AMU, Like I think he Okay, he is educated. The education thing is a thing like college. No, I don't. I don't know. So she thinks she's she thinks she don't know what he studied. Of all the

things to look into. I feel like if that's something that's a criteria priority for you, right, that he's educated, you want to know and what that's a good conversation for tonight. I think, yeah. But my problem is he said yes or a couple of days ago, like do you want to get dinner slash drinks on Wednesday? And I'm I am a strict no dinner first date situation. That could be ours um that you're already going in

with a negative frame of mind. No, no no, no, but I just all, I just want to do drinks and then like like, if it's a great day, we'll go out again next week. And that's fair, that's fair, right. I also work very early in the mornings and go to bed, like I don't want to she'd rather just drink alcohol on a Wednesday. And oh, I'm just trying to frame this in what what I'm just trying to figure out what you So, Okay, here's what here's the

way you've looked at this. Yes, you've you've basically ruled out most likely that he's a serial murderer. Yeah, and that's enough for you to go, Hey, we're gonna go to not dinner but drinks. Take a few back and if conversation isn't just riveting at that point, then there's no chances it's going to work. And you've eliminated all together. That's fair, especially like loose them up with a drink on a first date. Yeah yeah, like a little bit

liquid courage. Never heard like to drink Max. That's smart. I think that's actually very classically. I do not want to end up being like, you know, poppy or anything. And come on, that doesn't stop me. I'm only twenty four, but no, I'm kidding. I usually keep it really tame on the weekdays. So what do you like about him? And are there any red flags? Um, he's cute, he's yeah, he's like a good looking Okay, yeah, he's got some like scruff, which I'm into. He's like really tan and

full beard, but no full beard. I'm not really into full beards. Um, he's good looking. He seems like smart, and like he has hobbies, which is a really weird things a person like he plays soccer. He told me last night he won his soccer championship yesterday. How do you researched that? Because you could be lying? But I have not researched that. But I did find him on Facebook. I found his ex girlfriend. Like, these are not things.

A second, this dude you've not even met yet. I stalked him back to our first conversation to the point of knowing who his ex girlfriend is. What's wrong? I don't know who she is. I just saw photos. Because what I'm trying to do and Mark knows I have a problem with this is I'm trying to figure out how tall he is. Oh my god, I have this this just like concern of like showing up to a

date and being like a five seven girl. What if I were booties then we're up to like five ten maybe, And what if he's like so much shorter than me? What's wrong with I'm a tall guy, but I I'm six two, But I can never I just feel bad for anybody who's shorter because you can't control that, right if you're out of shape, that could be on you, go to the gym, eat healthier, whatever it is, but you can't control your height. So I'm standing up for

short dude right now? What is wrong with short? What is what if he is the most charismatic, kind, educated, soccer championship winning son of a gun, but he's five six Huh, what's wrong with that? I just feel like, Wow, Judge, yeah, totally, but you're five sets. Like if you were six ft tall, I could understand it being a concern because you're gonna run into that problem all the time. But five seven if you run into that a lot, that a lot of guys aren't tall enough for you. But she's so

she deserves above average guys. Okay, I do have I'm above average because like, I just believe all women should think that about themselves. But no, I think it's don't don't you think that there's a thing like if a guy is like shorter and he walks in a date and he realized it's like his date is really tall, I almost feel like then they get weird, and then I get weird. What you should just like line up at the door. He's gonna look up and you go, yeah, we tried nice to meet you. Why did you every

day tonight at eleven? That way, when he walks in, you can see on the side of the door how tall he is, and you can just end it right there before you have it's a hide. Okay, I take it all back. I'm going on the date. Yes, I found him on face but the good news is we did have a mutual friend. Okay, um who has weirdly sense deleted her Facebook, so I went back to double check, and then this is up. Can you take a chaperone on this? Seriously? Text her friend like meet at the

same bar, low key, Like I'm actually concerned. I mean, I hope it goes well, but I'm a little concerned. You had a friend that's no longer even a friend. Don't remember who the friend it was. I know, I know exactly what it was, but I was just trying to make you're like you still have a Facebook like anybody in the world, or what happened. I mean, I could text this person and be like, hey, do you know this guy? But that's why I don't know that you still not like each other. Guys, this is pain.

You know what really negative that's got to come go behind you. You know, here's a good part. It's either gonna work, it's not gonna work. You can move on to the next harmony match. Yes. And the great thing was I didn't want to go on this date, and I was like, wait, it's either gonna be a really great date or it's gonna be a bad date. And then you move on. Yeah, then it's over quickly. Then you meet that girlfriend you have at the bar for your own safety once again, which I'm encouraging for a

drink with her. You know what I mean. I'm not going to be unsafe. Every bad date is a stepping stone towards the one. It's a learning experience more what's important to you and what you want in a life partner, don't you think? I think so. And if every single date it's a bad date, then perhaps that's a time for self reflection. Well I don't on many dates lately. So this is because you blew a guy off recently, that's why. But tonight you're going, Yes, I am, I'm

not what time? I don't know? All right, guys, can we just solidify these plans. It's a day of I know we're millennials and just got texts an hour before going to tell you, and he's off work. He thinks around seven thirty will be when he will. Actually don't like that. I don't like a vague. If he's going to be safe, make it. I believe me. He's not flaking on this day. I know that the only flake is coming for me. So he seems pretty excited about this.

They're smiley faces involved. Oh my goodness. When the emojis. I guess I'm let that one passed, right? Are we cool but emojis? And are you not an emoji guy? James, I'm not a big emoji guy. Gotta be honest. I feel like it's become acceptable for guys to use emojis. I think at first it was, and I think it's

okay now who said that? Fine? If you start getting like the emoji thing, then I'm dropping blind alright, face fine, But if you're just dudes, you have a little have a little self respect, like, don't be bit emoji in it. And I know that because my assistant has it and uses it and downloaded it. But then I don't know how to read download it. And I'm proud of that. Okay,

kind a new phone. Don't know how to read download it anyways, what you say, everyone seems to think they look like they're bitmoji, And there's never any human who looks like they're bitmoji. No one does. I look so much like maybe nothing like your bit emoji. Nobody does. I'm sorry, no, thank god, that would be a weird thing. Also, what emojis are okay for a guy to use? Because I don't think it's all of them. I don't think it's a full with it's like the normal like smiley

smiley maybe, the crying laughing maybe. And that's funny because you can do thing it automatically translates sometimes, and I'll give that one a break, which doesn't automatically translate it does? What kind of are you a special one? What about a heart not acceptable for a guy who it's with? Okay? Yeah, also like that would be a red flag where it with somebody he's never met. Okay, sure, I think there's a time and place when the heart can fall into

your emotive. Do you use heart emojis? Really? But I don't use that many heart emojis about winky face? M hmm, all right, okay, here's the question for you. On that note. There's the winky face and there's like the weird like smirky emoji, which I'm pretty sure is slightly more sexual

than the winky face. But I use them interchangeably, and I even use them and like, oh, I use them at any time, at any moment purposely because I don't really know what they're supposed to mean, and it just brings me joy to think what the other people are interpreting those as so ladies, I use them all the time. I will say those two of my favorite but it doesn't really mean anything. And I use it because girls read way too much into these things. Again just brings

me joy, breaks me joy. Call me if you actually have a question for me, Stop it, you silly little girls. You're you're you're you're like you're a millennial, but you act like a gen exer to me. I completely don't fit into my generation in some ways us you know what I mean. I am old fashioned in some call me like who wants a phone call? I do because I never have a phone call. That's over, you know, succinct in thirty seconds. We got we need to talk

about when needs were done? Boom plans moving on. Then eighty five text messages. Besides, it's also a location thing, at geographic thing. I live in l A, which means I'm driving all the time. It's safer, hush, it's just not switch that on my side. It's safer to just call me. Stop texting me. And if you got to text me one text message, not eighteen in a row? Do you know who you are? Do you know who

you are? I'm like all of those things. I prefer phone calls, but I will text eighteen times in a row. How do you feel about FaceTime, James? A lot of my friends love FaceTime, they really do. I still kind of prefer a call because I'd rather have actual FaceTime in real life, with your real face. An ambush FaceTime up in advance is not a good thing in my opinion. I agree. And you know, sometimes I'm in my office and that's with quach quote and I very much mean

my bathroom. And I get a lot of work done from my office, okay, and I want to take a call. It's my own business, mom progative. You don't need to know, Okay, how long I'm in there, what I'm doing in there. Maybe I've got one those old fashioned hotel phones on my wall. Our parents been doing this for years. And if you you surprise ambush FaceTime me, that's gonna be awkward for you. It's not gonna be that awkward for me because I'm gonna pick up all right, So that's

on you. Now you know what's up, You know what might happen. I think before you FaceTime. Just think before you FaceTime, guys. The echo of a bathroom, like, there's a lot of issues here. Erica was talking to a guy that she usually want to date with and he ambushed FaceTime. During the middle of the conversation, she said, oh, my room is a messy goes let me see. All of a sudden, we're on the phone, which you already have no excuse not to pick up because you're already

talking to it. And I'm that's rude. What's no makeup? Ponytail hungover? I mean, I think that's cute when you're dating somebody. That's aggressive, suggressive move. But here's the this question for you. Did you pick up yes? Odd, I couldn't just be like, okay, I don't know, I died something. We still liked you afterwards, Well we never went on that date, so maybe shouldn't pick that one up. But

also bra a little aggressive, little even little rude. But at the same time, she figured that one out quickly, so I guess that worked for him. I don't know. Yeah, while we're on the subject to the harmony, Yes, we need to talk a little bit about how people need to get on this because if you're looking for a relationship and not just a hook up, because a lot of these dating apps, a hook up sites, and you don't really know the motivation of the the other people

on those apps. But with the harmony, you do. The harmony is the place to go if you're looking for a relationship. You're not going to get all the other apps, lazy text messages, dead end conversations, random matches that don't turn into anything random, Hey, sub how are you good? And then it just kind of dwindles and nothing else happens. But real people are finding real matches on the harmony. In fact, I have some example here, Lisa and Mark. Lisa,

Mark and Mark. They said, we never thought we'd meet somebody online that was so compatible, and we're so grateful that we were able to find each other. Look at that, Lisa and Mark. How about Bruce and Laurie? They said, don't settle for anything less, you too, will meet the one that will complete your life. I even have pictures of these people if you guys are interested about, I mean,

very interesting. They're gazing into each other's eyes. These people are legit happy relationships, because that's what the harmony does. They help you find lasting, meaningful relationships. I just realized I don't know why, like even in my time signing up for it. I just as my mom met my stepdad on the Harmony. Another success, and like totally they've been married for shoot three years. I don't know how long, sorry, mom, but they've been married a long time and they're happy,

and they're so happy. And yeah because of the Harmony. Yeah, they weren't on these apps and swiping and hooking up with people. They wanted a real commitment and that's what they found there. That's fantastic. They've helped over a million people, including Erica's mother and stuff father find a perfect match. And right now you can get a free month with the Harmony when you sign up for a three month subscription.

Enter the code help at checkout as in help I sucker dating the name of this podcast, help at check out. That's what we all need start your journey to satisfying, meaningful relationship. It can be fun to play around in those apps. Were you ready to fall in love with someone? E Harmony is there for you, the one app that's built to bring you real love and come see how Harmony can change your life. Go to e harmony dot com and get started. The code is help at checkout

Harmony dot com help at check out. When you sign up for a three month subscription, you get a free month. I like it. That's what I wanted to say. Harmony. You really convinced me that the state's gonna be good. It is going to be Actually, do think you know when it's e harmony, people are actually serious about it, and that's good. Hey, he's emojiing, so he's happy. Actually he's not. It's not an emoji. It's the dots in

the parentheses. It's a whole thing. Oh you know, I'm not even mad at that's a little old school, more into that, a little more into that, slightly more of the original. Yeah, like the ai am the moticon. I think that's what they used to be called. Straight up. Yeah, I love that. I'm less worried about the state. I'm not going to We got a bunch of emails. You get people who needs some dating advice. Are you ready to give these people dating advice? I can't wait. You're

in a relationship now. That makes you an expert. Absolutely. Alex is a female she found out there within her friend group. She's known as the three day Queen because when I find a guy I like, he goes on three days with me and then ghosts me. Trust me. I don't know why either. It's not because I sleep with them or do anything physical with them. I don't even have them over to my apartment. We do fun things. We go to movies and food festivals and ice skating,

fun things. I sometimes plan them, he sometimes planned them. I'm just not sure why I could never move past the third date. I'm twenty three. Everyone tells me I'm young, don't worry, but I'm beginning to feel like a spinster. I'm againing to feel like there's not really anyone out there for me. It also doesn't help that I'm the only single girl out of all of my friends. Therefore, that makes meeting new people hard because none of my

friends ever want to go out. I've used dating apps before, but I can't really get excited about them because guys are flakes. Most of the time. We'll talk for a week, exchange numbers, and then silence. I'm not afraid to text person be the one reaching out more, but I'm tired of pursuing man. I want someone to pursue me. Do you have any advice for someone that can't get past

three days? That's alex Well, Alex, if all of your friends are taken, perhaps find some single friends, you know what I mean, just some other people that are going out, because it is so much easier when when you're in a social setting, um or have you tell your friends to just I don't know how, stop being so boring and have them go out with their significant other. You can still go out when you're with someone. I'm with someone and we go out probably too much. That's a

different conversation. But also I'm kind of curious what these what these dates are, because you talk about like fun adventures, but you never invite them over. And I think that

there's kind of a fine line. You you want to wait and take things slow, which I completely respect, especially if you want something to be real, because you go too fast and it's going to be just a hook up, right, But if it's only just like fun activities and you're not showing any interest and maybe not even kissing or holding hands are getting intimate anyway, I think that it's easy for a guy, especially after three days, to go, oh, this is just a friend, which is fine, but guys

sometimes need to be lead. If you will need to be just to be very clear, like we all we don't overthink things. Sometimes we underthink things and would just go, oh she wants to go ice skating, Great, that was fun. Oh she wants to go bowling this time. Alright, we'll be going batting cages next time. Great. I found another bra, got my homie. Chick here likes to do sports, and that's exciting. But you need to let them know you're interested too. So maybe just maybe that is kind of

where there's some confusion going on. I think that's good advice that she doesn't do anything physical with them, and nobody here is encouraging you to sleep with anybody, to

do anything you're not comfortable with. But maybe a kiss might be assigned to them that we're taking the next step, because three days of funzies and no kissing of any kind, they're gonna think this isn't going they wear Yeah, I mean even if it's hand holding or some sort of intimacy in some ways, um, but especially basically you said that you don't ever have them over to your apartments, like if everything is social and there's never really any

alone time with you guys, Yeah, are they interesting getting to know each other? Really? That's what I was wondering with that. Make a gun at your apartment, that's a really nice day. Or have him over to watch the movielix Neflex and you get the whole chill. Maybe Alex doesn't need Netflix and chill. I think maybe maybe maybe

Date number three, it's Netflix and Hill. We've enjoyed ice skating, we've gone out man bowling with Brad was super exciting, kind of held hands, he gave me a little kisses time. Look at that Date two went already. Date three, you're gonna Netflix and you're gonna chill. But do it on your own terms. Okay, do it early, cook that dinner. So if you've got an early morning, you don't want them to spend the night, that's still your choice. But if it does go somewe a little further than great, right,

it needs to be going in a direction. And then Date four suddenly materializes. Now they're in a loving relationship. Date four their futures. Wow, I'm Alex. I'm excited for you, I really am. And you're welcome. What about your friends with these guys that they're dating, can't they try to hook you up with somebody one of their guys friends? Girls are the worst. That's setting up other girls. That's

just it. I just like, yeah. But the guys that the girl's boyfriends thinking like, oh, I've got this buddy and you've got this girl. I mean, yeah, come on, friends, throwing some double dating action here, right, Alex, your friends might be letting you down. So maybe back to my first point, let's get some new friends, just some new ones. Let's move on, all right. This is from Ali. I've been seeing this guy for a few months, we've been talking for over a year. Seeing and talking are in quotes,

and we'll find out in the second why. I met him a few summers ago at a restaurant we both worked at. I was the hostess, he was a waiter. Sounds like a typical movie romance, but it isn't going that way now. Everything with him is super vague, vague. I was of trouble with that word because I'm from Wisconsin, so I it's easy to go vague on it. So I have to kind of split the difference from vague, and then I get it wrong. But anyway, it's one

of those words I struggled with, wet, hang up. He used to show interest so much when we first started now I'm the one always initiating how long to hook up? Budd He's last. He shows interest sometimes, but other times he's distant. He never follows through. I have some feelings and it seems like he only thinks of himself. It's not that I wanted to be my boyfriend, but I can't even get simple gestures. Have you guys experienced a hot cold relationship. We've been doing this for months and

we haven't even been on a date. He claims it because he's in the heating business and when the season slows down we can try to hang out more. There's your hot cold relationship right there. He does wake up for work around six thirty am. But if you like and care about someone, you prioritize that is the truth. Ali. Anyway, he's told me his last girlfriend left a bad imprint on him. I sympathize, But he's also told me that if I don't like the way he handles things, I

should not hang out with him. I've broken it off a few times. When we come back to one another. Is it because we know the hookup is good? Or is it because we have a connection and we don't get much opportunity to explore it. Thanks guys. I hope I didn't ramble. I hope it makes soundse. I love the podcast and everyone who's a part of it. XO xo Ali Hearts Hearts Hearts move Ali, What are you doing?

You've been a hooking up with this dude for a year and you're still waiting around for it to be serious. I mean, please move on. I mean, homie is just gonna let you keep being the hook up if you just keep letting it happen. He's super vague. Yeah, a year into casually hooking up with somebody, want to try to be super vague too, because I wanted to keep going on as long as they're gonna stick around. I mean, this is on you, girl. You gotta move on if

you want some real it's not this dude. I have nothing that I just we're done with this and you did ramble, so I won't you deserve better? Do deserve battle? Battle battle, They deserve to how to speak? Eng's my Bad's on me. Look just that's it, you know what I mean? And I know you like him for whatever reasons, but he's not showing it back. It's been a year. That's enough time you know he's not reciprocating. I think

you need to find somebody who will. That's true. A year is all seasons of the year, the hot which season we're waiting for, waiting for that mystical fifth season to come around, waiting for him to grow up? And he's not there, So move on. Jessica is one years old. She recently went home with a guy that she just met. They were both drinking. We really hit it off. I didn't want the nex to end. He's twenty two, and we slept together. I regretted it the next day, but

I was happy. I met him. Five days later. We hung out again, sober at his apartment and I slept over. I knew that's why he wanted to hang out, but I just really wanted to see him again. I didn't hear from much after that, but on St. Patrick's Day he called me drunk and wanted me to go over when I didn't, and I snapchatted him the next day and he never answered. I keep thinking about him. Is he embarrassed? Does he just want sex from me? In general?

Help I second dating. I've got the answer to this one, but didn't also want to start us off. This is just bad. I it's it's not let me see if if on the same page as you, let's go. He just wants that from you, and that's all I'm afraid that's all this is in his mind. I'm sorry. That is correct. He's not embarrassed. He you're the hook up, and if you don't want to be the hook up anymore, you gotta stop. It's as simple as that, you know, and hopefully you had fun with it. There's nothing wrong

with that. There really isn't. Sex should be enjoyable. It sounds like it was completely mutual and you had a great time. Um, and then you went and you did it again. You did sober, which just validated that, hey, this is a cool thing that we can do. And I think that, especially at twenty two years old, I think it is fair to say the girls grow faster. Twenty two year old dude is just excited to be hooking up with a pretty girl right now, and you're made.

You've made it. Not that you've made it easy on you both. You both ended up doing this pretty quickly and pretty casually, which to him was so exciting, like, oh, we can keep doing this. But the moment you're going to try and take it further. I feel like it might just be too late to stop. And if he really is interested, then whether it's a week or a month or whenever, he might come back and then say hey, I missed this, and then you can address a potential relationship.

But you can't just keep poking up with them and expect it to go somewhere further. The friends with benefits relationship, somebody often the girl, but somebody's going to develop feelings in that situation, and then it's gonna be problematic if somebody's gonna get hurt. And I think every girl finds them in one of those relationships at some point and accidentally sometimes right like you didn't how do that? Oh

my god? I yeah, too many times and then you end up sitting there like wait a minute, this is like so not me, Like that's not what I want. And if she's trying to have contact with him outside of what he wants and he's not reciprocating, it's done.

So yes, But on that note, don't be embarrassed because everybody does do this in it right, So hopefully you had fun and just find someone else and show them, you know, if you're interested a little earlier on maybe and if this guy is, you know, really interested and grows up, he'll probably text you back in a little bit. I like that you give some hope to this situation. There should be hope. Let's live in a state of hope.

Absolutely more. Organ we know more than Morgan has tweeted as a bunch of times, I got her name wrong and she'll never let me forget that I called her Megan, and I feel bad about it. But I have a dog named Morgan and a daughter with the middle name Megan. So it's all confusing, super confusing. Hi, Sarah, happy to have you. Morgan's interesting. She goes to the same restaurant once a month, sometimes once a week, and she's really

into the manager. His name is Austin. He's cool, he's kind, and he said to her she looks super cute, but at the time she was dating someone, which she got the super cute. Now that she's been single for a few months, she's been trying to see him, but she's not told him that she's single, and he hasn't asked either. What she wants to do with her friend go with her and talk about how single she is and kind of make it obvious to him, and she's not sure

if that's weird or not. Should she tell him she's single and let it go? It's been four years she's been going at this restaurant and nothing's happened yet. She's twenty three, so since she was nineteen, she's been a regular at this place. And also what if he's dating someone? Now? What's sure? Also he does cute things for me. He gives her immune boost Choose, I love this place. I want to go there, give me hot tea for free. When my voice is gone. He doesn't even make me pay.

I pay him later. Is he just kinder? Is he interested? Also? Just random thing to throw? And when your voice is gone? How often is your voice? Maybe? I guess has happened once or twice. It's just like a reoccurring thing. Are you a singer? I can understand that. Wait also four years and talk about this again? Taking four years to even asked this? Show some advice? Yeah? I mean yeah, he's probably dated eighteen people. I don't just do you

could have a wife and kids at this point. I think I think you might need to say something pretty soon, not wait another four years for else. I don't know, you just might risk him dating someone else, because, like we said, why not just just initiate this, right? Can she be a little more obvious about this? I think you need to be if you like them and you keep going there once a week, don't lie to us, girl, It's not once a month. Even said it could be

once a week. It's clearly twice a week. And you know, just just say hey, by the way, you know I'm single. You know, do you want to go out for tea sometime at another tea place? Mean, look, be cute about it, be awkward about it, that's okay, but say something awkward, adorable, awkward, Yes it is. It's not working for me. Awkward is kind of your thing? Yeah, totally. But anyway back to more and raise your own awkwardness. Someone's going to find

their own flavor of awkward. Yeah. I mean, look, if you want to be super awkward and have your friend coming, like, how are you going to just talk about a single you? Guys, I don't love it. I don't love it either. What is this sex in the city? And like we just get super loud, like, oh my god, I haven't been with a guy in eight months and that's just gonna sound weird too. Can't you just go up here and say, look,

I've been coming here for four years. I've really enjoyed seeing you here every time I was look forward to seeing you. Would you want to hang out sometime? Like? What's wrong with that? Literally? Just verbat and repeat what he just said. Just that's just as simple as that. You just just say something honest and and that's very honest, and clearly he likes you in some capacity. He is giving you what vitamin? Choose? Both choose? Do you just get sick all the time? Is your voice always? I

don't know. I mean play it up. You guys can go play doctor or something. I don't know. Okay, maybe wait until like the third day for that one again. That's my fourth date specialty playing doctor. I want to lead people to straight here. Yes, say something, Morgan, I think. I think the theme of today's show is guys, don't be afraid. What do you really have to lose? That's the thing. You might have to go to a different health food restaurant. Okay, you know, I guess if you're

getting free teasev what's more valuable? The free tease and health choose. If that's the worst case scenario, I think you gotta go for it. Just ask him to hang out. I think so, I think so, and you'll know immediately his response. And I mean literally, next time you go there, don't wait even a month, because you're gonna get to a pattern of waiting. Doing this for four years that really is adorable. Maybe don't say you've liked him for

four years. That could come across as a little bit much at first, but honestly, you're a saving company for a long time. He knows you know him and just say, hey, let's uh would hang out sometimes? I like it is Is it a red flag at all that he told her she looks SuperH my god, that's what I was going to bring up. Super cute. It's a weird Did straight guys say, oh my gosh, you look super cute? Oh gosh, okay, iddy, you did, You're no. I think

that's fine. You look you look really cute. I mean, i'd probably say really, but you can say super It's like, yeah, you look super cute today. Who knows this is over four years he said a lot of Okay, so let's say that he's so let's say that was him being honest and genuine. That was he was opening the door, him trying. So hopefully that wasn't when you were nineteen and this was closer to you being twenty three. Because that happened recently, he's clearly interested. I think the doors

open and then things could have changed. But if it happened recently, you could even compliment him back and started that way. But like, hey, you look great today. I mean, you can flirt once, he said, he's flirted once. He's been a gentleman. Actually, he flirted once and you didn't reciprocate it. So we didn't do it again, So he probably won't until you do. This one is definitely on you, definitely on you more than go for it. Let us know, let us know what happened. Tweet me. You know how

to do that. Can't wait, Austin, lucky man. Four years she's been falling for you. What a great story to tell your kids someday I went to his restaurant for four years. Really up here, by the way, our email address, I suck at dating and I heeart media dot com. And they'll head into it one more here because we got to keep these emails coming they're great stuff. This is an anonymous and those are usually the juiciest. She's twenty two. She went in a couple of days with

a guy and it was great. He was such a gentleman, and we agreed we wanted to hang out again. In the following days. We exchanged the lighthearted banter on Snapchat, Instagram, et cetera, and he was super conversational and sarcastic, which I love. Later that week, I have to hang out again and he didn't answer. A day or two later, I sent a gift that said rejected because he has a good sense of humor, and he apologized incessantly. He sent Smiley's just like You're Gay. Erica suggested things we

could do, share that he was nervous. I was actually mad and said, he text me. Well, since then, he's been distant. The funny banter is gone, and I feel like he's completely uninterested. All of a sudden, What happened? He was the one initiating, and all of a sudden it's stopped. Is he just telling me he's busy as an excuse? Should I still put an effort? Any advice

is welcome. She's anonymous, Hi anonymous? How are you. This is a tough one because I think we all find ourselves in situations like this, especially when you're single and you're dating, you know, especially with all the apps and

and all the opportunity to meet somebody new. Most people are talking to several people at once, and so it's a combination of meeting the right person and then timing because if things are going well, you can't wait around go and meet that person, continue to get another person because if you wait you long, you're both talking to five or ten people or twenty people on these freaking things. Now, yeah, he's gonna end up meeting somebody else. You're gonna have

talking to someone else. You can only keep each one of these conversations going for so long, which is why the apps I think that they're referring to don't work super well. It's too much opportunity too quickly. So if you like him and you've gone on these days, it's I mean, just I would initiate trying to do more

in person. Again, you're not gonna win if you're just competing over text or over snapchat or whatever it is with all the other people, You're gonna win being in person, being the great person version of you that you are. So I think that's if you like somebody, that's where you gotta differentiate. You don't get in the habit of just texting back and forth because you're both doing it with too many people and trying to do your jobs, whatever they may be, and live your lives. It's too much.

So it's inevitable that, especially a guy, is going to be distant because guys won't. I don't personally. I don't like keeping up on text all the time. So if you like him, let him know that, go out in person again and feel it out in real life. Yeah, I think there's something going on and you don't know what it is, and you almost don't have to know what it is. But he's moved on, he's over it.

He's maybe got his eye on somebody else. Man. I guess he could be super busy or something like the girl and me wants to be like, oh he hail, it's maybe his dog the flu right. Yeah, we could go on forever, but it's a great excuse, sespecially when you don't have a dog. The bottom line is, if he wanted to go out with you again, he would go out with you again. Percent easy, and I'm sorry that he doesn't, and maybe he will someday, but you don't want to wait around for that because you can

do better. You want a guy who's really excited to see you again. Absolutely, And i'd say, look, and I hate to hate to say be a guy in this regard, so I want to give us a little more credit. But a lot of guys will kind of almost give it like an ultimatum, which is like, hey, let's do this one thing and if you don't respond, they're gonna move on. They're gonna go they're gonna just let it go. And guys have an ability to do that, do the

same thing, do it right back. But like, hey, been fun hanging out with you, would love to see you this week on free Thursday. Do you want to go out? Just be definitive and if his answers yes, and you guys go out and it's great, fantastic. If he doesn't respond or he's flaky on it, call quits, move on. Guys. That's interesting to bring that up, because guys do have a real issue with rejection. Whether it's I mean, it's a I know, but guys are really and I experienced

this a lot. Uh in my dating life. I'm married now James, but back in the day, thank you kidding, that's awesome. You fear rejection, you really do. I mean it's asking somebody out or asking there's always, like he said, if you ask someone out and they say no, it's uh. I don't know if it's a bloat your masculinity or whatever it is. You don't want to experience that again,

so you're less likely to ask again. Absolutely, I think the guys are much more quick to put up walls and if it doesn't work at first, they're afraid to keep trying. And it's you know, I think there's there's something we said about sometimes a girl continuing to initiate the conversation and try for it. But if he's just shut off, he just moved on for whatever reason. Don't waste your time. Go meet somebody else. Can meet somebody who's going to reciprocate it. And once again, it may

not be that he doesn't like you. It could just be a timing thing. You're twenty two, he's around your age. I'm telling you ladies, young guys, young twenties, especially in l A. I don't know where you live it's tough to take things too seriously. Um, there's too much opportunity. Man, everybody's got an app meeting eighty five thousand people a day. The second something isn't perfect in somebody's mind, they move

on to the next thing, and it sucks. And I wish it wasn't that way because I don't like it. I am old fashioned in that regard. But just be realistic. That's the world we live in. And if somebody's gonna do that to you, don't waste your time. Go meet

somebody else. You know what's interesting about you? Guys saying like men hate rejection whatever, Then why is it that men are always the ones who a month later, six months later, reach back in send you that text, want to remind you they're still around, Like after you've moved on, the sex was probably okay, well a little bored that weekend. I don't just come on just like it's just every guy I've ever dated. It is just like, well, you know,

a year later, OK. For you, a year later, it's embarrassing, Oh my god, I better play your cards right. I'm just saying, because guys forget the rejection after a while. They only remember the good parts. God, it's like when they're the ones who screwed it up, they should just stay away. Yeah, that's and that is Every guy who's ever like dumped me is like, oh hey, hold on a second though, and it's like no. Well, they also like to keep their options open. They like having a

lot of possibilities at all times. They want the attention all right. They like a lot of a lot of pots and a lot of burners. Well, I'm gonna get my pots on my burner. Men. You go for a girl, you go for you just cook up a whole feast pots and burners. I don't know where this reference is going, but I'm gonna all right before we go, James, what's going on with you in terms of acting? In terms of music, Um, I I'm very excited. I've got a new single called All Day, which will be coming out

here shortly. I currently have a single Falling that's out right now, so I'm very excited about that. Um. A couple of movies coming out just got Actually I don't know when this is. One's coming out, so I don't want to talk about it, but I'll show you the picture. It's super creepy. How do you not know when your movies are coming out, because that's that's the problem with that.

I've got my movie Bachelor Lions. We had a premiere in January and it's slated to go to theaters, so we'll be getting a major theatrical release, which I'm very excited about. But they've got to figure out amongst all the other movies coming out when it's gonna go. This one's kind of fun. It's called Twisted Tenants. I have no idea what it's coming up, but I just got the post you today, creepy. It played a serial killer, which was mold of the World. So yeah, film and music,

a bunch going on. I'm very excited. So just at James Maslow follow all my fun stuff and I'll keep you guys updated. Can we say we probably can't say any about what you told us earlier today the call you got this morning, because that was pretty cool. I don't know if you can say anything though, Oh yeah, of course. I mean, you never know what's gonna happen, but I um, just because it was kind of serendipitous, we're talking about it. I got an offer for a

movie this morning, which is always amazing. I'm very, very blessed to be in a position where that's that's happening and starting to happen more exactly how I wanted to. My point is, I've always wanted to do a period piece, especially World War Two, because my grandfather flew B seventeen bombers in World War Two, actually has two purple hearts shotdown twice, saved his whole crew both times. And I've always wanted to, you know, be able to act, to pick that area as we kind of respect and homage

to him. And got a an offer for a film in World World War two era, and it happens to be my grandfather's birthday today, and it happened today, So I just thought that was very serendipitous and very awesome and I can't wait to read the script and get into it, and I hope it is as awesome as it sounds. Yeah day, thank you great, thank you, thank you very much for being here today. It's you guys are so fun. I hope you'll come back and do

this again. I would love to. And everybody who wrote in their emails, thank you guys, and all the listeners. I hope you guys enjoyed having me. It was fun being here. I suck at dating at I heeart media dot com. Keep them coming and give us updates and what's going on. You can let no James, if we can let James know if his advice was any good at all, if it worked, or if it didn't. You give good advice though, thank you. I'd like I'd like

to think so, you know what I mean. We keep it all a little bit of levity with it, joke to a point, but I hope it actually helps. As somebody who's been navigating the dating world for the better part of the last ten years, not anymore. No, right now, we're we've navigated, we have found, we have found somebody really special. So hey, next time we'll talk about where that's at. Right of being good, Hey, I'll bring her on still going well, she's still being nice to me.

That would be fun. Oh my god, that would be a little ridiculous. Actually not a bad idea. All right, Thank you, James. This has been help. I suck at dating, and next week maybe hopefully all of you will suck a little less. Sure, Yeah, hell, I suck at dating. On I Heart radio or wherever you listen to podcasts,