Mental Health Advocacy With Reggie Wideman

This has led to his community involvement as a board member with the not for profit right around Portland and. Co-chair of the technology association, Oregon's tech and color community. In this episode, we discuss how Reggie manages his anxiety. Corporate trends in mental health and how we advocates for mental health through an annual video series. Called one minute for mental health. Now let's get to the interview. Welcome to the show, Reggie Wideman.

What I wanna kind of get into is a little bit about you, your background, how you got today, and then, you know, how you decided to create this kind of mental health awareness, minute, which obviously is occurring during May, which is a mental health awareness month. So can you tell me a little bit about your background there?

And that is the first place I ever worked in Portland right when they opened. So I've been here 20 years, um,

And uh, and I just didn't have it, like, whatever it was when I lived in dc Like I just, everybody was in this rat race and I just didn't understand it. then I moved here. Um, and maybe then there was too much balance, like maybe too much relaxing, but it was nice to like have nature and have people care about things other than money and status. Um, and so I got, I got, came here, like had an apartment with the roommate and worked retail and had fun.

And then I started working for tech companies just kind of on a whim. Like I think my first one was, uh, contract job, part-time for now software, which was spun out of a bunch of extensive guys.

Um, And then I went to work for Wells Fargo in their technology management office, testing their, uh, mortgage software, which was miserable for about a year, And uh, and then I went, I went to my first real, real, real startup, which was Ethics Point, um, as a customer service rep, you know, so they're now NAVEX Global. Um, and uh, so I was there around an employee 50 60, uh, and did that for several years.

And then, uh, the now software guys had rebranded his U software and they were like, uh, I'm sorry, it was now Software and a Chan Transition U software while I was there. Now they're called aza and it's a RSS enterprise feed management tool. And they're like, we're going, we're going big and we want you to come join and like lead our professional services. And I was like, So I go join, and that lasts about six months and they go out of business.

Um, and uh, and they were doing a big project for Cisco and they were partnering with this user experience design firm. Um, and so I was interacting with them. So user experience design firm reached out to me and they're like, Hey, we, we heard you're on the market, come work for us. And I was like, well, what do you do? And they're like, we can user experience design. And I was like, I don't know what that is. So they hired me and they basically taught me the discipline.

Um, Dwin King, um, you know, was the, was the, the CEO and founder. Uh, and I learned so much and I'm forever grateful. And all of our work at the time was done like on behalf of the digital agencies. Um, in town. So back then agencies knew UX was important, but they didn't source it in-house, right? So we were doing that for all the agencies around us.

And so I was in this weird position where I was getting to like, work on these like, cool digital campaigns, but like, in this very specific way. And I just got, became enamored of digital and advertising and marketing. So then I went a firm, um, called ten four. And I was a ten four for about two and a half years. And we were just this cutting edge, like, kick ass, don't care what you think, digital agency. And we blew up big and burned out fast.

Uh, so that was like another two, two and a half years. Um, but we did great work for some of the biggest brands like in the world, like really like, and just the briefest amount of time. Um, and uh, and so then I went back to another startups that was, that would've been Jan Rain. So that was rss, or not rss. We already did rss. This is now a social login. So like using your social identity, uh, uh, to log in to digital experiences and then brands being able to sort of, we can say it now.

Harvest. Harvest, steal your personal data, that's not what we called it back. We called it sharing but, uh, they take your data and they use it to, you know, build a profile and target you with, you know, experiences and products and what have you. Um, and then I just wanted to like, I was like, I want to try big, you know, so then I, I, I went to Salesforce.

Um, I was a Salesforce for four and a half years, and I was in marketing consulting and then, uh, more experienced consulting where it was like, sort of like, like the entire customer life cycle. So, you know, not just focused on Salesforce Marketing Cloud, but like all the products that Salesforce could bring to the table to create these like unified consumer experiences and just worked with like, All the brands that I was excited to ever like be in the same room with.

And it was just a really pivotal part of my career, but it was also really, really hard work. Had kids at that time, uh, went through a divorce at that time. Um, and so that's what led me to being sort of kind of burnt out and needing to do, do something different.

Um, and so when the opportunity to join Linux came along, that's kind of where my, my mindset was when I was like, well, like I can focus on something specific like cdp, consumer data platform, smaller team, smaller company, fewer politics, let's see what happens. Um, and then the pandemic changed everything. Uh, so that kind of is how I got to where I am professionally.

Um, you know, thinking about the pandemic, it was, yeah, that first year of the pandemic, uh, I had become super focused on mental health. And the reason I became focused on mental health was because of a focus on physical health. Because during that time, particularly at Salesforce, um, I was like, I got really outta shape. I was just, I was overweight, you know, and I had a great doctor.

He's still my doctor, and he's like, Hey, like, you're fine now, but like, you literally will be dead in 10 years if you don't change things. So I started running, I started working out, I started count calories, changed my diet, and got really physically healthy. Um, and, and, and saw that like there was a process that I could follow to do that.

Um, and then I started really dealing with anxiety, which has been a lifelong struggle for me, but I really reached a point where I couldn't manage the anxiety with, you know, um, humor or alcohol or avoidance tactics. Like it was really like impacting me and affecting me. And so I really had to just like face it head on. And so I kind of thought about my anxiety, like the same way I thought about like rearchitecting my physical health. Like one, we should talk about it.

Two, I should make a plan for how I'm gonna deal with it. Um, and, and, and three, execute against that plan and be kind to myself when I fail, you know? So had conversations with my doctor about medication. I decided I didn't want medication.

Um, and, you know, looked at the research and was like the, the, the physical exercise really was a factor in, in helping to sort of limit anxiety, but also sort of cleaning house on like what you were dealing with in your life, like the things that were causing your anxiety. Um, you know, I did, you know, start using like, like a one over the counter product I use as a. Uh, it's a cortisol product that balances out your cortisol in your system.

So whenever you're having an anxiety spike, cortisol is spiking in your system. And cortisol, um, it causes you to, like, it causes your heart to race. It causes your body to start. So basically cortisol is what helps you survive. Saru tigers like a Saru Tigers chasing your cortisol spikes. You have all this energy, you run, you're hyper aware of everything. Your body starts saving fat because it doesn't know. Yes, it doesn't know when you're going to eat next, right?

So people wonder like, why did I gain weight? It's like, well, because you have anxiety and your body decided to like, it doesn't know what's going on because we don't have saver two tigers anymore, right? We have like taxes. and difficult

And when it comes upon me, I know what to do to mitigate it and to get through it. Right? Um, and so like that was my thing and what led me to wanting to do this was there, there were, there were two pivotal moments. I guess there were three, so we'll jump all the way back to when I was 12 years old. And when I was 12 years old, I had an older brother who passed. Um, and uh, I was really struggling with it, which is who wouldn't be?

And my mother decided to put me in therapy and my father was against it. Um, and they fought about it and my mother put me in therapy anyway. And the lesson I learned very early on at such a young age was that like, there, there's no stigma in going to therapy, which a lot of people still have a stigma around going to therapy. Um, but also I learned that there are people who would judge me for it. Like my father. There were people who would say, that's a weakness, like, get over it.

Like be a man, right? So that was one thing. And then the second thing was once I'd gotten through my anxiety journey, there was someone who I mentored and they approached me, um, and they that they were struggling with anxiety, didn't know anything about. and they were talking about that they were struggling with anxiety when they asked me for advice. And so I talked to them about techniques for dealing with anxiety. I talked about cortisol manager for dealing with anxiety.

Um, I, I talked to them about, you know, this is normal. Like, don't, like let this get you down. And, and, and I helped them and support them and followed up with them to get through their anxiety. And it, it always bothered me that I didn't do one thing that was super critical, which was to tell them that I also suffer my anxiety. Like literally more important than any of the other things that I did was to just tell them. Cuz that's what we struggle with.

Um, you know, whenever I have these conversations, I always say if there are three topics, uh, divorce, abortion, and bankruptcy, that if you bring up someone will raise their hand, but if you don't bring it. nobody will ever bring it up. Right? So like for me it's like super important. Like, just talk about it. I suffer from anxiety. I've largely conquered my anxiety, but I still suffer from anxiety. It's something I will have with me for the rest of my life. People seem to like me.

I seem to be relatively successful, so it's not something that's destroying me. So if you suffer from anxiety, know that, let's deal with it. I'll help you. Right? And so, so that was the thing. And then, uh, so those two things. And then the third really was the pandemic. Like the pandemic hit. I had a lot of time on my hands, And uh, and I was trying to figure out like what to do with it. And I also knew that like, yeah, I was reaching out to friends, and friends were reaching out to me.

It was that time, like during the early pandemic, everybody's like, you, you good? You okay checking, thinking about you? Like that's what we were all doing. And I was like, well, how do we like support each other in, in this environment? And so I decided, well maybe I'll make some videos and like post them to the internet. See what happens. So I literally, just like on a whim, started, uh, recording videos in May for mental health waste month, like three years ago.

Just. in my, uh, dining room, um, just, just topics like here, something that people should be talking about or here's something that people should be thinking about or here's a lesson, you know? Um, and the first year's really weird for me. It's like hard to watch It's really hard to watch. Um, and, uh, and, and I had after the first year, like, so I'd really, I'd wanted to do a video every day. And a good friend of mine talked me under that.

He's like, he's like, you will have no mental health at the end of May if you commit to recording the video every single day. So I didn't, it was like every three days I did a video and that was tough. Um, and then for year two, I was like, well, I guess I'm gonna do this again, but I really still have that goal of doing a video every single day. Um, and so then I was like, well, I'll just ask other people if they wanna do videos.

And I started asking people, I was like, hell yeah, I wanna do one. And I was like, okay, this is like a thing. Um, and then it just kind of grew from there. And then, so the third year was, was much more, my, my lytics actually supported the third year. Um, and so it was much better produced than everything and it was really good.

Um, and then when I started to think about, uh, the fourth year, I, I just want, like, there's so many things that I wanted to improve upon and I just like, but there's, it's gonna be like last year cause I don't have the time of the bandwidth to do it. And then the layoff happened and I was like, well, what a gift. Like I have this opportunity now to really turn this thing into something so much cooler and, and higher impact than it's ever been. But also to be, to leverage.

You know, you think about this, there are one minute videos and there's, there's a silly reason for that. Um, but there are one minute videos and like, if you went to the site and watched every single video, I mean, it would take you just like a little over an hour to watch all of them. For, for three years worth of content. Like, you know, who doesn't have time for that?

Like, we all talk about, like, I, you know, I'm so busy, but like, really, you don't have time to watch a one minute video only on weekdays every day for a month. I think you do, you do have that, and you have time to share it, and you have time to pass it on to like, people who you think need to hear this message, you know? Um, so yeah, like, like it, it's, it's been really powerful for me personally to like be able to put this out there.

But honestly, the gift for me has been one thing that I had tried to do with year two and I started doing it with other people was to like dictate like, like, this is gonna be depression week, and then then we'll have anxiety week, you know? And I was like, it was like, but then you, that puts you in a position where it's like, I have to go, Hey, uh, do you have depression? Would you like to talk about?

And were only meeting through this project, but it lots of close friends and they would talk about things that they had never shared with me and now they're suddenly like delivering this video to me. Like, so I, I have, I have a friend who I'm very close to, we talk about everything and she's in, she's in tech and, uh, I knew she, I figured she's gonna do a video about being a woman in tech and like how much harder it is and like the discrimination women face and this and that.

Um, and then I get her video and I walked it and it's about postpartum depression. And I'm like, oh, I did not know that she suffered from postpartum depression. The reason I didn't know is cuz it's none of my business. But I didn't know. Um, and, uh, and, and her video helped so many people, like so many people watched that video and it was like, okay, I can talk about this.

I can talk about this thing that I'm experiencing, that I was expected to just go back to work and be a trooper, but actually I'm really struggling, so I'm glad this person is actually raising this and talking about it because I have this experience too. And I thought it was just me. I thought there was something wrong with me. You know, she actually says that in the video. There's nothing wrong with you, you know?

Um, and that to me is most powerful thing because I, I get thrown for a loop every year. Like, it was like, I know this person. I know their history. This is totally what they're gonna talk about. And then like, nope. Completely different and incredibly powerful. Um, I fear I'm, I'm rambling at this point.

When you make something like you said, you're doing it from your, your dinner room table. I'm just doing this. I'm upstairs office. It's a basic setup. Um, and we always join judge ourselves and like, oh, the look, look at that person's setup. I'm always like, look at they're lighting. How can I can't make my lighting like that? Uh, you know, there's always something. But I think it takes, it takes courage to just do something.

And, and I know with you doing this, you've done it about a few years. I started my, my podcast last year and just getting, you know, being a voice and getting it for things out there, it's very, it can be very scary to open up that much about yourself, but I know videos like you're doing and what I'm doing hope with that can help people out and just see, oh wow. Like I know I was diagnosed with ADHD just a few years ago. It, it explains a lot.

And there's some great things about, like, uh, hyperfocus is when you're like an entrepreneur type person, you just can focus, laser focus when you're really into something. But then if you're not into something else, it, the one thing I'll say about ADHD is that it's not that people can't focus, it's just hard for them focus on things that don't interest them. That's what it's about.

I was listening to some people's videos on YouTube that talk about, you know, just average people talking about adhd. And I'm like, oh, that's really cool. I connect to them. Like there are other people do these weird things that I do that I'm like, why am I doing this and stuff. Anytime you can bring a community together and gather people, have them tell their stories, it's, it's very important.

And I, I think it has to be, um, organic and when you, like you were talking to people like, this is depression week. I think sometimes you need to kind of maybe give the person some suggestions. So they kind of have an idea of maybe what to do. But yeah, if you kind of put it in this block, then it's like kind of more force and everything. So I like, I do like that.

I see that you've reviewed or, or you've had for minutes on that and all type, different type of people of different types of mental health and different careers and different points in their life. So, I really like that. What's cool about this episode? Oh, I wanted to contact you cuz I was like, oh, it's almost May and this will be up before May. So hopefully we can get more eyeballs on, on what you're doing.

Um, and so I, I had, I used to have two rules and one rule was that like I didn't let anybody who I worked with participate and I threw that rule away. Last year, a bunch of Lytics employees did it. And the other rule was nobody in my circle, um, could be involved because it's just like this is like, I don't want any relationship to get messed up by this. Like, cuz you know, I might make a decision that you don't agree with.

Like, um, and I'm sitting around trying to find somebody to like partner with me on it and I'd asked a few people and, you know, some people were not committal, some people said, no, it's too much. Um, and she's always there, like supporting it, cheerleading it, and then I was just like, well, do you want to do it? I think she was almost mad at me cuz she had wanted to the whole time but was like being respectful of the fact that I was not asking her to do it.

Um, so yeah, so she became the partner and uh, and I think that her commitment to mental health, you know, she has her own journey that she talks about in her video, um, is just as high as mine. And, you know, and we, we, we follow a lot of the same processes. We believe in therapy. We have regular therapists who we see regularly and we talk about our issues. Uh, and we, and we are committed to working through things and becoming better people.

So she's the perfect model for the type of person who should be leading some of the, something like this. And also, candidly, when I think about like a partner in this, I want, I wanted it to be someone that if at some point I need to stop doing this or I want to stop doing this, then I know that they would just keep it going. And that is Lizzie. She absolutely will. um, if that ever is the, the case.

So, um, yeah, and she's just, um, uh, she's just a really great person, you know, and, and I think that, uh, I have, I think I definitely come off like, um, very professional. I've got some rough edges, uh, and she's much more warm and welcoming than I am. So I think it creates a very necessary diversity, uh, for one minute for mental health. So, she'll be doing her own videos, you know, like talking about the content that's coming up and promoting people's videos.

And I'm delighted for people to get the experience of Lizzie. So it's gonna be, it's gonna be awesome.

And then also just having someone to bounce ideas off of, because if it's all in your head or something, or you know, you're talking to some other friends, they might be like, okay, this is interesting, but can we talk about something else now? Um, so I, I think that's great. It's always nice to have, uh, a team effort on those things.

Uh, I wanna go back when, when you were talking about dealing with anxiety when you were, uh, around, I think it was 12, uh, and you went to therapy and your, your father didn't want you to go and your, your mother. You know, ended up saying, Hey, he needs to go. Uh, I think I can relate to that in some ways from the fact that I think when we were kids, it just, thereby Willy wasn't a thing and anxiety really wasn't a thing, you know, like I definitely had anxiety as a kid.

I didn't know what it was, and you don't really know how to express to anyone what it is. So I think it is a real challenge back then. I mean, well, it's still a challenge now, but at least there's more resources now than, um, when we were kids. And then also, you know, when you're, you're younger too, uh, you kind of learn to kind of bottle things up. Um, if you, aren't going to see a counselor or anything.

And if you keep doing that over and over time, just it gets deeper and deeper and then there's just more anxiety in you and you don't know what to do with it. But I, I think part of it too is that it is hard also for men to. Accept emotions, um, often and, you know, it's like you have to be kind of the, the tougher person typically. I think that's probably just, you know, in society, um, how, things are perceived too.

other piece of it, again, the racial component is like black women handle shit. They just handle everything, right? they just do. And uh, and so, yeah, and so my mom just like looked at the situation like this kidneys therapy, so he is going to therapy and story, like we're not talking about anything else, you know? Um, and so I'm forever thankful that like that's the perspective that she had cuz I don't even think for her.

I mean, for her, it, it's interesting going back to my health analogy, cuz for her, I don't think she understood mental health or that she understood like how therapy worked or anything. I just think it was like, if he needs a Band-aid, he gets a band-aid. You know, if he needs, you know, if he needs a splint, he gets a splint. If he needs to go to therapy, goes to therapy. Like, shut up, I'm doing it. You know? Um, so, so I like, I'm forever thankful for her for taking that perspective.

Cuz I think a lot of people would've backed down, you know, it, it wasn't a stranger, it was my other parent, right. And he was pretty adamant that I was not to go to therapy and she's like, he's going, forget it. Shut up. You know? Um, so I think that was, it was really helpful. And I think like, you know, With my kids. I talk a lot about mental health and I talk a lot about emotions and, you know, and, and dealing with them and, and how they're not weaknesses.

Um, because for that exact reason, because like I, you know, your only mission with your kids is to, is to help them skip half the bullshit that you dealt with, you know, growing up. And so if I can help them skip worrying about whether talking to a therapist, like I just want my kids to come home one day and go, Hey, I think I need to talk to a therapist. I'm, I'm working through some stuff and I'm like, all right, no problem. Let's get you somebody.

Like, like if that happens, like I feel like I will have succeeded as a parent because like I didn't

Um, and so my mom definitely gets the credit for, for me, on that path, even though I don't know that she knew that, that that's what she was doing. She was just trying to be a loving parent. So, um, yeah. Yeah, that's a big part of it. And I think that shapes a lot of why one minute for mental health is what it is now. Right. Because it's really just about normalizing those conversations. It's about talk about stuff, you know? Um, I remember that, uh, first year.

like some of the messages and I think people were particularly raw, right? Um, and I remember that first year I would get notes from people like on like LinkedIn mess, you know, messages like on LinkedIn, like private messages. Like, Hey, thanks for this. I attempted, you know, I attempted to take my own life last week and this really helped. And I'm like, oh my God, are are you seeing a therapist? And they're like, yeah, yeah, I got a therapist. Like, okay, good.

Like, you know, cuz I'm not equipped, I'm not a medical, I'm not a mental health professional. I'm a mental health enthusiast,

Like think about when we were kids, it would be weird to talk about having a gay relative.

But that, that lack of support came from a place of those parents being afraid of how they would be judged, how the kids would be judged, that they wouldn't have opportunities in society that they deserved as, as human beings. Right? That's all fear. Right. But if we can, if we let go of that, then your focus can really just be on what's best for your child.

And if what's best for your child is to express themselves in the way that makes them joyful and happy, then you don't, you wouldn't care if they were gay or that they were with a person of the same genderism. Right. But does fear creeps up and it's like, oh, they're not gonna be able to get job and people get judged them and somebody might attack them, you know? And what are people gonna say about me? They can say, I raised my kids wrong. Right. And like, all that stuff is garbage. Right?

Cuz it could be anything. right? It could be your kid could get a job. That's weird. And it's like, oh, it's cuz you raised them wrong. Like like it could be anything. Um, you know, but it's all, it's just fear, you know? I mean, my dad like, has lived and, and probably still lives his life with a lot of fear that he has been unable to let go of. Um, and that that's what caused you to lash out.

So, like I said, him not wanting me to go to therapy was a fear of me being weak, which was, comes from a fear of if he were weak, like how the world would consume him as a black man. You know? Um, I understand it. I just don't want to pass it on to my own kids,

And you know, one of my friends just had a second kid. I'm like, is it. Are you guys a pro now? After you got the first one, you least, you learned some things. There's no, I know there's not pro, but at least, at least you know how things work, you know, in theory. But I, I don't know.

I mean, unfortunately right now the weather in Portland has not been so great lately to get outside. but there's always something you can do. I actually went to Lloyd Center Mall. Which is kinda depressing, honestly. And I walked around for, for two and a half miles just cuz I'm like, the weather's bad. I need to get, I don't feel like doing anything else. It's low key. But after I do that, I'm like, oh, I'm gonna do it for 10 minutes, then I'm gonna do it for half an hour.

And just, it, it makes feel better. If you really attack it in the morning, it helps you come over some demons And then if you overcome those, then usually you set yourself of a pretty good day cuz you are more even keeled and you have more energy. So tell me about how that's helped your kind of exercise regiment.

And then I, and I, and he told me where the gym was and I was like, oh, well you should just walk there and walk back. So that like doubles like the exercise you'll get once you work out the gym. And then you probably don't have to do any cardio at the gym. You can just like do some waitress stuff and then walk home. And he like looked at me and he is like, this neighborhood is too dangerous for me to walk to the gym. And I was like, oh yeah, I didn't think about that.

Like he's still, he was still in Baltimore at the time. Um, but he's like, I can't walk there. He's like, you crazy? And I was like, yeah, I didn't think about that. So I recognized that exercise is a privilege on. Levels, you know, financial, you know, situational and, you know, ability. Um, but uh, I agree with you that it's really important, uh, to focus on your physical health as a component of your mental health.

And they're just interconnected in ways that I think we're even only just learning to understand. Um, I do think that like, when it comes to exercise, like the most important thing, and I think this is, this is actually the thing everybody struggles with, is your exercise has to be something that you enjoy. And that's, I think, the biggest thing. Cuz some people are like, you know what I got, I'm gonna lose weight, I'm gonna start running. Do you like running? I like running. I enjoy it.

But if you don't just do something else, like anything else, but like, don't do something because it's just gonna cause you to stop. It's gonna cause you to actually resent it. It's like, you know, the analog would be if you start seeing a therapist and you don't like them. a different therapist, like some people stick with a therapist that they don't connect with and they're like, yeah, it didn't really help me.

It's like, well, if you don't trust or like your therapist, like they can't help you like this, just it's stuck. Doesn't mean they're a bad therapist, it just means that you guys don't connect in that way. So, um, so finding something you enjoy is incredibly important. And I personally find that it's important to like actually set like an external goal. So like every year I try to run the hella half marathon, which kind of sets me up to have to like train. So I'm training for it right now.

So I have to train for this thing, right? I can't just like go out there and do it and I'm training for it. It's a six month commitment. Um, so I started in January start and it's in the first week of June. Um, and then I'll probably do another one in December, you know, and then that kind of puts me in a space where I'm like, perpetually training. Again, these are things that I pay to do and I have a privilege to be able to do them.

I have a privilege of working in types of jobs or not working where I can just exercise. So I get that, that it's gonna be a different situation from people. But I think take your situation in context and say, what can I do? Can I go for a walk? Right? Or like, does my office building have a gym in that, that I'm allowed to use? And maybe I'll do a 30 minute lunch and work out really quickly for 30 minutes or work out after I get off or go come in early and do a workout.

Like find your situation. Um, but also find that other thing. I think the, the other thing is the innovation around like home workouts during the pandemic has been through the roof. So now there's so many different ways, equipment or without equipment to like work out at home. Um, and I think people need to take advantage of those things as well. But also if it's hiking, like figure out like how to take hikes a couple times a week, especially in the, in, as the weather warms up.

But find the thing that works for you that you enjoy, that you'll actually look forward to doing. Um, because if that's not the purpose, then you will always fall off of it because it's not core to you. Don't care about it. You know, it would be like, if I didn't like one minute for mental health it, I would be miserable, like, like putting this thing together. But I have the energy to support it and to work on it and to push it forward and to make it better cuz it means something to me.

I think all as best aspects of our life, we have to attempt to find the light in that way. So I would include physical fitness in that.

Like it's better to compete with yourself. I'm slowly getting better at that myself. And just everyone's got different situation. We all like, have different things. Maybe have an injury or something that makes things harder to do. So think about that. And then also finding a place that's maybe helps build a sense of community. Pre covid. I used to work out this place called Portland Team Fitness. It was kind of a, a boot camp type workout place. Awesome place.

Covid Covid killed it though, and it was just great people. And so you wanted to go there, you wanted to suffer together and you loved it. Find that right community, um, or just finding a friend or something, uh, just to kind of have some type of connection. recently my friend from high school, he invited me to share his workouts on our, on our, you know, on his Apple Watch and on my Apple Watch. So when I see what he did, I'm like, oh, he just did that. Well, guess what?

I guess I'm doing more today. And so, you know, just these little things that are kind of fun and, and competitive versus like, oh, I have to, you know, do an Ironman this year or something where really impressive if you do that, but it, you know, might wanna take baby steps first.

I I will either run alone or I'll run with people who I know are slower than me and run at their pace and then we enjoy ourselves and, you know, maybe have a conversation. Um, and then you're still getting some exercise, but you're also getting some socialization. Um, but yeah, the, the competitive part is tricky, right? Cuz you got, you just gotta be careful.

But I think it's also just if you're intentional, you know, you are like, okay, I wanna be competitive with somebody who's at my level, I don't wanna be competitive with somebody. Like, you know, like during Covid I started running with a bunch of guys and who didn't run, um, and I got them into running, but they were all like in their.

And so I got them all into running and then they all quickly got better than me and then I quit running with them and they were like, you don't wanna run with that? I was like, no, I want you guys to keep running, but I can't keep up with you. I'll hurt myself. So, but I'm proud that you're gonna do this, but I'm gonna go run by myself. at a much slower pace. So, yeah.

It seems like your, your niche is kind of coming into a place and you're good at kind of building teams and kind of leading. Early innovation on things. In your time and all that you've done that and all the different corporations you work for, from small to big, what have you seen as far as support and mental health at these companies? Have you seen improvements happen as well?

Um, I, it seems like Linux was a company that was, uh, more forward thinking with that probably cuz of you, uh, maybe you can elaborate, elaborate a little on that.

I'm gonna leave without a job even, I'm just gonna quit. Right. And I think that was very stunning for a lot of companies, cuz I think that sort of the unspoken rule was like, well, we'll pay you well and we'll give you great benefits and if you're suffering, you're suffering. Like you're doing it for the money. Right. You know, and then I think people say, they go, well no, I don't want that. Like, I want the money and the benefits and to not suffer Like that's what I actually want.

Um, and so I think a lot of companies have made great strides in that area. I think a lot of companies, um, have, have made great strides in seeing mental health, uh, as a important component, you know, of, of, of a, a successful employee. So I think that's definitely like a good thing.

Um, I think where there's lots of work to do, like I, you know, I'm remembering a story, um, from a company I worked at where, uh, I was having a hard time and, uh, and I, I, but I was, I was very open about my mental health. I went to my, my manager and I said, Hey, I'm struggling with some anxiety right now. Um, and I just want you to know that I don't need you to do anything and I'm working through it. And I could tell that my manager was very uncomfortable with me saying that to him.

Like he didn't, like, he didn't criticize me, he didn't hold it against me ultimately, but I was definitely not comfortable like having a conversation about my mental health with me. Um, and then I was casually talking with another coworker about it and they were like, why did you tell your manager that? And I was like, what? They're like, why did you tell your manager that you have anxiety, you're struggling with it? I was like, because I am.

And, and I was like, and actually I was relating this story again recently and I said, listen, it would be like if I got hit by a car and then hit it from my boss. Like, Reggie, you sound like, do you have a bandage on your phone? Ah, yeah. Just a little. Nothing's fine. Like, it'd be weird, right? To be like, wait, you got hit by a car? You didn't tell me. It was like, ah, I didn't want you to worry. Like, why aren't we the same way?

Like if I'm struggling with anxiety, like, like you wouldn't fire me for getting hit by a car and maybe not being able to type for a couple of days, right? You wouldn't fire me for that. So why would you fire me for saying that I'm dealing with anxiety like, or that I need to take a couple days off to just like get my head straight. Like these

Then I had anxiety about it, But, uh, but I, you know, I had reached a point in my personal development where yeah, like that wasn't something that freaked me out at that point. Like, that was just, this is who I am. Like here's what's going on.

Um, but certainly there were earlier, but, you know, well, the sad part is as I think back to earlier parts of my career, like I think that I would, I, I can't say that I wouldn't have been comfortable or uncomfortable talking about my mental health because I was just completely unaware of it. Like, I know that I can think of other times in my career where I definitely was dealing or suffering from anxiety or maybe even depression and just didn't know that's what it was.

It was like, why am I so tired? Work hard. like, you know, get your shit together. Like, um, but at that point I was fully aware of like who I was and what I was worth and like, and, and what I was dealing with. So I was comfortable just saying it to my boss. But then, yeah, this other person gave me pause when they were like, that was a mistake. Shouldn't have done that. Um, but I think, yeah, I think, go ahead. Sorry,

You know, management about that and you say you need some type of help, you know, they're supposed to, you know, by law, within reason, you know, accommodate what you're dealing with. Um, and that's a whole like weird new scary thing that I'm learning about too. And, and trying to, you know, I've interviewed other people and talked about it and trying to learn as much as I can too to, to help other people out too, to see if they're, they're having an issue.

Cuz you know, they don't wanna see anything negative happen to their job or something. But I do like also how your intention of having the confidence saying, Hey, this is who I am and if you guys aren't acceptant, then it's definitely not a good fit. Which I think that's kind of a cool perspective too.

And then you're like, okay, well it's like on basketball teams, like sometimes you're like in the N B A, you're a one team and then you go to a different team and you're great cuz this, the culture and the teammates, you, you weren't playing your position there, you're paying, you know, a different position. So yeah, I like that.

All of the previous three years content is available. You can find us on one minute for mental health on YouTube. Um, you can find us for at one minute for mental health on Instagram. Uh, there's a one minute for mental health company page on LinkedIn. Um, so any of those places you can go to find us not doing Twitter or Facebook, sorry, um, or. But those other places, you can easily find this. So, and we're, we're gonna be there all month.

And I feel like with this new model with YouTube, um, there's gonna be more seasonal content going forward. So there's gonna be things beyond mental health awareness model related to that. Um, I am also the co-chair of Tech and color for the Technology Association of Oregon. And next Thursday, the 27th, we are gonna be doing a bipo, uh, co-working lunch from 10:00 AM to two at the central office on Morrison downtown.

Um, and there's gonna be a component of that, uh, that will be related to mental Health Awareness Month that we'll talk more about, um, as we, as we get through that session. But like, if you're a bipo person in tech, uh, that just wants to connect with other bipo people in tech, uh, we're having this co-working day. Lunch is provided.

There'll be space for you to work wifi, everything you need, uh, you can just come and you can just work or you can come and you can network and work, or you can just check it out and leave whatever you wanna do. It's a, it's a space for you. Um, and then in late, Or get some free food. and then in late May, uh, the dates and, and, and other logistics have not been finalized. But I'll be doing a panel for o e n on founders in mental health, probably in like the last week of May.

Um, so look out for that. As it gets finalized, it gets announced, but that's, that's the little bit of stuff that I've got going on for the next six weeks.