Road Rage: GRRRR!!!

That's right. Um. I would like to just right off the bat say that. In Chuck's book Driving, there are three kinds of drivers. Okay, I thought about this. Uh, there are good drivers, Okay, it's me, which you're generally just capable, confident. You make mistakes, but you're just in control of your vehicle. Defensive driving. That's me. There are bad drivers, that's me. Uh, nervous drivers. You know, have you ever been a car with someone that just doesn't

feel confident behind me? That's the worst. It's scary. It's not the worst. Actually that's coming. But also people who are just in their own like I say, they have their heads up their fannies. I say that a lot in traffic, get your head out of your Fannie r H. So that counts as a bad driver, just in your own world, basically not even thinking that there are other people around you. That is still the second one. Yeah, okay, yeah, I'm not I'm not number two. And then the third

is jerks. That's me and I think jerk. I think we can reach people in the first two categories with this read of this podcast, But you can't reach jerks. I don't know, man, because I definitely consider myself a jerk in traffic, you can't reach jerks. And and this reached me in a lot of voice. Well, then you're not a jerk, because jerks are ones who are like feel completely justified to like get up in front of someone and slam on the brakes if as punishment. That

is jerk. So I wouldn't slam on my brakes. That's just stupid and juvenile. But I would go around somebody who cut me off and maybe cut them off, which would make me a jerk. Right, that makes you a dangerous driver? Okay, Well I agree, and I realized that that being a dangerous driver is a really stupid, dumb thing to do. And this article, Like I was already

on the road. You me hate the way I drive a lot of times, right, so she's got me on shortly as far as driving goes um and so like I'm already in the mindset, but then reading this article helped drive it home even further, like, yes, this is really stupid. The thing that that the light bulb that went on over my head was like, if you drive aggressively, it's bad enough, right, it can be dangerous. It just takes a very stressful situation. It makes it worse for yourself, hand, everybody.

But then one thing I hadn't considered. You might run a foul of somebody who is like a genuine psychopath that will run you off the road and kill you. It actually a weapon on you and try and shoot you. Right. There's a there's a video of cell phone video of a guy who was driving and there's a guy road raging next to him or whatever, and the guy was

just filming him. And in the film, the guy pulls out a gun and all of a sudden, a puff of gray smoke comes out of the end of the gun that's being pointed at the guy shooting the video, who's driving in the other has been fired unless that gun just burped right. That guy was a doctor in Kentucky. The guy who shot at the other dude, So, um, you never know who you're going to run a foul And that was one thing I hadn't considered. That Now I'm like, oh yeah, I should probably add this to

the pile of reasons why I shouldn't drive like a jerk. Well, and here's my caveat here is I think that any of those three drivers I described can be You can be any of those given certain circumstances on any given day. But what I mean by jerks or people that are just they're out of the car, they're jerks. Personality wise, they're jerks and that's just who you are, and that's not who you are. Thanks man, I'm just about to put you on the spot. But you took the initiative.

How about that. So this is written by Jonathan Strickland of tech Stuff, who ironically does not have a driver's license. Now he doesn't drive, but and you can tell that Strickland wrote this because he talks a lot early on about how dangerous and stressful driving is and how basically you could sort of extrapolate you're a fool if you drive a car pretty much. Yeah, that's why I don't.

And um, road rage what we're talking about here is, um it's a of a fairly recent providence, which means it's kind of one of those um like since cars have been around, yeah, but even more recent than that, As far as as far as I can tell, they've traced the origin of the term back to only and it didn't really become like a nationally renowned thing until

the nineties. Um. And there was this this idea that there was an epidemic of road rage going and I think a lot of people still suspect that there's plenty of road rage. But you don't hear the word like epidemic used any longer as much. I think now everybody just calls it driving. But the it's it's also contextually bound, right, there's not like a strict definition of it. No. But you also you can't have road rage without having a car.

And the more and more I looked into this, more and more I realized that road rage is not you can't just extrapolate it onto other conditions. It is a very unique, very specific type of mental malady. Basically you know, like because people behave in their car, and we see this over and over when they talked to psychological experts or psychologists, Um that it. It's you behave in your car much differently like the things you would do in a car you would not think of doing, like in

an elevator. Yeah, the car but stosa and you a sense of um, not invincibility, but there's a little bit there's like you can see the other person, but there's a barrier between that person that gives you the confidence in the arrogance to be like, here's my middle finger. Whereas like, like you said, if you were in an elevator, you would not do the same thing. I said, floor to get your head out of your middle finger. Right, So the car set you up for a certain sort

of psychological aggressiveness. It's become okay. But it's also also when you're in a car, you're almost always plopped into a set of stressful circumstances, and so all of this together leads to a potential for road rage to just kick in. Yeah, well there's uh someone and boy what a name. Dr Leon James Um studies this a lot, and he has even known as Doctor Driving because he has been an expert witness to Congress on traffic psychology. That's all it takes to get a name like Dr Driving.

I bet he never gets honked at with that vanity plate in traffic right after driving. So um he believes and I tend to agree with him that one of the big causes of road rage isn't too many people or traffic or whatever, but the way our culture views aggressive driving. And he pointed out that children who see their parents are nice and sweet folks, when they get in a car, they see them driving aggressively and yelling

things and saying things. And this brings kids up with this idea that wait a minute, when I'm in this weird tin can on four wheels, or when my parents are their personality changes. Yeah, I get to flip the bird at people. Yeah, and it's fine. You can yell, scream and cuts would never do that in real life. But um so children see this and then it becomes or if you just watch TV or movies, you know aggressive driving is uh is the norm? Yeah? Have you

ever seen the Transporter Yeah? Or Bullet Yeah? Or Fat st and Furious twelve or the best car chase ever? Blues Brothers. Oh, that's a tough one. No, that's it. That's the one that's tough. That's the one fridge connection. Oh go to sleep better than the Blues Brothers. You kidding,

that's there's some great car chases. So so you've got you have children seeing, um, their parents acting hostily and aggressively in the car, learning that, right, do you have, like you said, fast driving being glorified to a certain degree. And then also, uh, it's married with this idea that was around for a very long time. Our friends Sigmund Freud came up with this um that if you have some sort of base emotion like anger or whatever it should be, it should be vented. Yeah, and that's not

the case. They're finding. There's this thing called Catharsis theory that, um, if you have that base lee is what I just said, that like if you're if you're frustrated, you just shout and like being on your steering wheel and you'll feel better. And studies have found that no, actually you're just practicing to be a better, better at being aggressive in real life, right, And that the supposedly the best way to do it is just ruminate on it. Just basically sulk until it

goes away, or meditate. Sure, a couple of other things that come into play are especially here in the United States, UM in tendency to not back down because that's cowardly. We're taught to stand firm, and um a sense of justice is that's a big one for me. Well plus also, um,

all of that is psychological. You can take it even further down to the neurological and biological levels where when you are in a situation where you perceive that you are being encroached upon or threatened or something like that, your fight or flight syndrome is going to kick inch

or and you're going to react badly. You're going to have the opportunity to feel aggressive because again, your flight aspect is probably diminished because you feel protected and separated from that driver by your car and their car, like this is my area. So fight is probably going to be the one that kicks in the most right and when that happens, anger kicks in. And anger is this

article puts as a very seductive emotion. Yeah, that adrenaline. Um, it might not feel good in the moment, but adrenaline, you know, it's it's a rush and Uh, yeah, it is seductive people. I don't know if they seek it out, but when it happens, it's not like that felt bad. No, you're like, I feel like a million bucks. I'm gonna go tell my boss what's what? But the and if you're kind of getting that like this, this seems like something of a hodgepodge or a kitchen sink of like

pop psychology, it very much is what I think. One of the things that has kind of been pushed to the wayside is the idea that road rage is made up by the media or that it's is just nothing but pop psychology. It does appear to be a real thing. It's very situational and context specific. Um. And yet because it isn't fully understood all of the mechanisms and processes, there's a lot of room for morning talk show hosts to to interview fraudulent experts on it and then that

become factor theory or whatever. Yeah, my my advice is to not watch those shows ever unless we're on it, and to um, if you need proof, look around driving a big city one day and just do that for an hour and you will witness some kind of road rage. Well I was I read this article from like the late nineties by this I think a sociologist or something. He was like, this is completely fabricated road rage epidemic.

Road rage itself doesn't this um by by this guy, And the person who interviewed the guy went about just totally disassembling his argument. The guy, he was like strictling, he didn't drive road to train, admitted he'd never never experienced UM road rage or what it what it must be like, or what people are saying as road rage, and he was just sure it didn't exist. He did back it up a little bit with UM police reports and all that stuff, but no, road rage definitely does exist.

It happens. So let's take a break, Chuckers before we go on, because I'm getting excited and I need to calm down. All right, I'm feeling calm, alright, good. Um, Let's talk about a little bit about just what goes on in a typical incident. Uh, what you're looking at is usually an almost always an escalation, a trigger and

an escalation an aggressive action. One person does something, someone else does something back, like a punishment, and it escalates from there, hopefully not too much, but like you said, it can lead to murder. Well, yeah, man, there's this um.

There's a guy out there who's called the um road rage Killer has apparently killed multiple people, including this guy, Timothy Davison, who was UM, who was chased for fifteen miles in Maryland, through Maryland and Pennsylvania before the road rage killer forced him off the road and then got out and shot him to death while he was in his car. This person probably thinks they're making the roads a safer place. I think they're also just a serial killer who has this an unusual m O. That too,

uh So Dr James dr driving excuse me. He identified a bunch of aspects of driving that that can contribute to this, and that all makes sense. One is immobility because you're um, you're stuck there. You can't like, you know, if you're at home and you're stressed out, you can go take a jog or something. Sure, go hit the boxing bag, which is again I've been discounted the heavy bag. Um. And when you're behind the wheel of a car, you can't do that stuff unless you have a speedbag like

hanging in the driver's seat. And then similarly, you're also feeling a sense of constriction right, Like, you're on the road and it's the open road, and it's a big road, but I mean, really, it's just several feet across. You gotta stay on it. Yeah, you have to stay on it. You're you're boxed in. Uh So that makes sense. Lack

of control. Even if you are one of the good drivers, like I mentioned, in control of your vehicle, you cannot uh predict or have any control over the drivers around you, or traffic or can struction or whether or anything else that can add up to a cruddy commute, right. And um, what's more, you don't have the option of just abandoning your car or in traffic gets bad, So you're stuck. Oh you can if you're Michael Douglas and falling down, right. But that's what made that act so radical and kicked

off and established his character. He just leaves his car in traffic. People don't do that, which contributes further to that lack of control. You're stuck there, whether you like it or not, unless you want to give up your car. For a lot of people like the cars the most expensive possession they own, and so they're not going to abandon it. So that to me, the lack of control.

That is probably the most um seaconed situation or aspect of um of driving that can lead to aggression and hostility and stresses like you're if you're if you need to be somewhere, and you left in time, and you made sure that you got up early and you got out there, and everything's great on your end, but then you pull right into traffic, and you know you're going to be late. Well, that's not fair. It's not fair. It's just it's it's unjust. That's right, and it's everyone

else in front of your's fault, that's right. Territoriality is a big one. Um. Like I said earlier, this is our space, and if you infringe upon that space, there's trouble. Uh. Denial and loss of objectivity is a pretty obvious one because no one it's never your fault, right you know, Yeah, it's not you, it's the other true. Yeah, although that's not true for me. I will in case I do a bone head move or when that happens, I'm always

very quick to say I'm sorry. Well, I will get very mad if they they continue to yell at me. If I'm like, oh, I'm sorry about that. That was you know, my fault and then they're still yelling at me. Oh yeah, they've got half right. Then then I'm like, they have a half a second to accept your apology or ignore it if they if they escalate on right, Yeah, Like, what do you want to put me in stocks and

flog me? I'm saying I'm sorry here, and I do the same thing, chuck, Like if I do something stupid like I almost every time, we'll be like, sorry, throw the hand up. Sure, just the all fingers sticking up right. Unpredictability, Um, you never know what's going to happen out there, so that can make it stressful if you're not confident. Yeah, especially if you're not confident. I imagine that's a terrible

way to drive. Uh. And then ambiguity. I never really thought about that, but I'm strickling points out there is no um mutually agreed upon the way to say you're sorry. I've always kind of thought it was throw the hand up a nod hand. And I think people are perceptive enough to tell when you're sarcastically waving, like when somebody wouldn't let you in even though you had your blinker on.

And finally you're like, I'm forcing my way in front of you, and then you give them that sarcastic wave like thanks so much, I'm in front of you even though you didn't want me to. I think people can distinguish between that wave and like uh sorry, shoulders hunched, sorry kinda, or the appreciate it wave is a great when you're up, you're waving, you're turning about in your seat, maybe you turn your winshell wipers on and a salute to the people. Yeah, do you can tell the difference? Yeah,

you know, let's let someone over. I found more and more people are intentionally don't let people in. If someone's like, oh I miss my turn, such can I get in there? And people like what kind of psychopath? What kind of sociopath? Oh, it's the same thing whether no, no, no, I would let you in, but I'm not gonna do it. The roads are lousy with those people. And you know what, when I see somebody else do that, I'm just like, I'll be like you piece of garbage to the person

who wouldn't let the other person in. But then every once in a while, and I'm really shocked and just made when this happens, like, um, somebody will be trying to like go ahead of me, and I know they're gonna get in front of me, and I'll like look down and I didn't realize it, but I've been accelerating rather than just going the same speed I was before. Unconsciously, I'm like, you're not getting in front of me, so I'm like speeding up. And it's just such a horrible

thing to do. When I realized it, I'll I'll stop and let them go or whatever. But um, yeah, it's almost unconscious. Sometimes some people you can tell that it's very much conscious, they're just not letting the person in. But I think sometimes it's also unconscious, like people don't they don't want to be behind somebody. Yeah, and I'll also point out to that, you know, you should let people over and stuff, just to be nice and pay it forward. But um, for why is that so funny?

Think it funny? Oh, I didn't even see that movie. That's a real term. You wouldn't say you wouldn't use that term if you've seen the movie. Um. But sometimes if someone has you know, missed their turn and they're blocking an entire row of traffic that is trying to turn, sometimes you just gotta be like you missed your turn, Like take the right turn around and start over, Like there's forty people behind you that didn't miss their turn.

They're trying to take that right. Man. Totally agreed. And those people are like, Nope, I'm just gonna sit here or blocking the box and an intersection, Yeah, you just sets everybody back big fines in New York City. Not not in Atlanta. It's a free for all here in Atlanta. Anybody can pull into an intersection at any time and block as much traffic as they want. And it's partially um the traffic planners are partially responsible for this chuck. There are plenty of dumb lights out there in dumb

intersection systems that need to be improved. But is you just you don't block the box. If everybody agrees not to block the box, then traffic will actually move a lot faster for everybody. Yeah, well, actually take a step back. The real rule is don't enter and in section if you cannot get completely through the intersection. Well that's the thing. Don't block the box. Yeah, but sometimes people think like, oh, well I think I see traffic moving, I'll just go

ahead and get out there. Then that light turns and then you're sitting in there like a jerk. What we need is just driver lest cars do the thinking for us or people without their heads up their fannies. Um, all right, so is it road rage? Is it aggressive driving? It's hard to determine that because, um, you ask a hundred people and you're gonna get a hundred different answers. Like some people say, like, no driving, driving forty and

a thirty is fine, that's not aggressive. Yeah. Supposedly forty seven percent of Americans consider driving ten miles an hour or more over the speed limit to be a type of aggressive driving. That's part of the problem is you have wildly different opinions on what aggressive driving is, right, So, um, not only do you have different opinions on that aggressive driving is if even if people all agree, yeah, like tailing somebody is following way too closely is aggressive driving?

I think pretty much everyone can agree on that, there's still no quantifiable way to say that. Is it like three ft is it a car length? Well, car length, like there's their actual laws that say the amount of car links you're supposed to behind someone, how many, Well, it depends on your state. What state Georgia Uh, well, I haven't taken the driver's test thirty something years, but if I remember, like if they teach you in Driver's ed, like two car links is safe and unless it's raining,

and then you're supposed to increase it by one. But I mean there are rules that's not just indeterminate. People don't follow them, but like that's where you'll get a ticket if you rear end someone. Right, once you rear end somebody, But people very rarely get pulled over for just for following, of course, not unless you're following a

cop too closely. Okay, agreed? Like people, there's no real definition necessarily of road rage, although Strickling points out that there's a lot of people say what would constitute aggressive driving is road rage? Um, and he kind of sticks to the definition of road rages when aggressive driving triggers a situation where people are committing acts of violence against one another, either using their cars or because their cars

are around their cars. Yeah, I guess my definition would be more than one interaction, like one person cutting someone off and like flipping a bird not nice, But I don't know if that's road rage. But if then that person reacts to them back, and you have a a

situation going on between two people. That's road rage. To my definition of road rage is when you are when something just sets you off and you go with it, even if you're not, like even if the person doesn't see you, or you're not trying to get the person to see you, but like you're pounding on your steering wheel because somebody cut you off or they didn't use

their blinker. They're sitting there on their cell phone at a green light or something like that, and you're you're just that moment of basically temporary insanity that can just be a one off. To me, it doesn't even have to necessarily overtly include two people. It can be one person being set off by the behavior of another person. That to me is road rage. Yeah, I've I've gotten

much worse, I have to admit about. You know, when the light turned screen, it used to be just a polite lot like someone doesn't notice just a little the light screen. But now the person is invariably looking down at their phone, and I don't just do a kind little beep anymore. Yeah, I give him a hawk. And the other day, oh man, I had a lady sitting at the green light, on her phone texting. I could see her hot good at her. She flips me off

and continued like I'm gonna finish my text. My god, oh dude, I had to like channel every like you know, catch Stephens song on the planet running through my head. They're not good nuts because I fall into the trap too. I'm not perfect that I was. I was so angry at the injustice of her to being like, no, no, no, I know it's green. Shut up, I'm gonna finish this text.

Or similarly, I'll notice people who are, um, it's not quite that hostile, but like you'll beep and they'll look up and they'll see like, oh, it's green, and then there they start to do both. They're still on their phone, but then they start to drive, but they're going like a half a mile an hour, and it's not that much better than flipping you off and sitting there continuing to text. At least that lady knew where she stood. Yeah, maybe I should give her credit for just being herself,

you know. Um alright, so dr driving Um he lifted some. He divides aggressive driving up into three areas that I think are pretty emblematic of what you see every day. There's impatience and inattentiveness, which is sort of what I was talking about earlier. You're rolling through stop signs, you're blocking the box, You're you're sitting there on your cell phone, you're speeding. Um, you have your head up, your Fannie or your your other excuses. I'm super late. I'm sorry,

but I'm really late. Yeah. These are almost two two sides, two opposite sides of the same coin. Um, but they are. They constitute doctor Driving's lowest level of aggressive driving or road rage, depending on your definition. Right. Don't you find that a little disconcerting that after all these years, we still don't have a distinct definition for road rage and that there's a guy named doctor Driving at the vanguard of the study of this. Yeah, uh, alright, escalates into

number two, which is a power struggle. And this is big, you know, this is a big deal. This is when you are, um flipping someone off, they're flipping you off. You've rolled your window down, You're making that eye contact that they don't recommend you make. Um, I'm much more passive aggressive. I'd never make the eye contact. Right, do you like scratch the side of your face? It's just your middle finger. No, No, I don't do that. I don't flip anyone the bird. That's just I'm just like,

you never know who that person is. Yeah, Like I don't want to have someone run me off the road and try and kill me basically, right, See, that never even occurred to me. And I'm a passive, aggressive Southerner. That's really probably why um tailgating people cutting them off acts of retaliation, and basically he says that this is people with an unhealthy mentality when you think that you're the target of someone else, like that person is after me, which can be the case my That happens to me

a lot. Like anyone who's driving slow in front of me in the fast lane is purposefully not getting over because they don't feel like they have to and it doesn't matter that I'm behind them. They just they don't have to do it. They don't care that there it's their right to be in the fast lane just as much as mine, even though they're driving slower. That is the one of the greatest challenges in my entire life, is just dealing the lane. Yeah, yeah, that's one of

your big peeves. You know. Georgia has a law now where you can be fine for driving slow in the fast lane. Yeah. We we actually talked about that on an episode, and I think we were we were talking it up and we got some mail from people like that's a ridiculous, dangerous law. I'm like, no, that's a

great law. Our response to all of them work, get out of the left lane problem solved, so that one's mine, where it's like, I have to remember, there's nothing personal and even if that guy is like, well, it's my specific right to be on the fast lane to jerk, it has nothing to do with me. The person doesn't know me. It's not anything to do with my day. And um we I was reading this thing in Pacific Standard.

Did you read the article. It's called the Psychology and Biology of road Rage, And they were talking about how it's potentially one of the things that people with road rage have is called intermittent explosive disorder, where you basically disproportionately rage towards a stimulus, right, yeah, to any given stimulus. So they were saying, like, I got the impression like it's a bit of a stretch. They were saying that

people with I E. D Um. It doesn't necessarily mean that if you have road rage, you have I E D. But they were saying that road rage could be a symptom of I E D. But the thing that I got that's part of this Internet intermittent explosive disorder. The thing that stuck out to me was hostile hostile attribution bias. Yes, that seems to come up a lot in road rage. Yeah, and I think, um, I guarantee you that's tied to

narcissistic personality disorder. It just sort of goes hand in hand basically, like they're the injury or threat is not an accident. It is purposeful um and personal right. But that's what I'm saying. When somebody's driving fast in front of me, me being a narcissist, apparently I have to I have to say, like as whatever I can just go around him, doesn't matter, even if they are like I know who you are, I know you're in front

of It really changes nothing. Now we're still going seventy eight miles an hour down the highway in metal boxes, which means safety first, no matter what. Yes, So do you get up in front of him and then do the old Dallas them with your winch of wiper fluid? No? I don't do that. I've seen people do that before, Like, all right, I guess I gotta turn on my wipers for a second. Now. I have never taken that as a hostile act, although I'm sure people do do the thing.

I've seen people do that. No, Like someone will cut you off and they'll get in front on the high way and squirt their because it speed. Yeah, no, I know what you mean. Children basically acting like children. I

will um. I have gotten to the point now I've gotten way better, Chuck, I really am have learned to just keep my aggressive driving and check um and just let it go, let it go, and like I'll still be a spark there, but I've gotten to a point where I can be like, it doesn't matter, just go around them right until it bleeds, until it work their way all the way through. See you come in the mornings,

you're just bloody in the face. But if it's really bad, if somebody is clearly just being like an arrogant jerk, like this is my fast lane to my taxes paid for this, I don't have to get around you. And it's a real thing. I've got this thing now. Where as I'm passing them, pass them slowly and calmly and everything safe. But I'll just be like staring forward with this huge overbite. Likely this is the slight and it works really great. That's pretty good, and it feels pretty

good to me too. It feels more clever than like shooting someone in the bird. You know, anyone can throw out a middle finger, unless I guess you don't have the middle finger. You know, it's a problem. So the final bit, the final category is recklessness and road rage, and that's when it escalates to full on violence. I'm

gonna use my car's weapon or I have a weapon. Yeah, And the same Pacific Standard article UM reference to an article in the journal Sexy Sexy Journal UM Accident Analysis and Prevention and found that UM, the presence of a gun increases road raging aggressive driving behavior, like even if even if the person doesn't pull it out, just knowing it's in the glove compartment makes it more likely to

be hostile. Yeah, it says they're more likely to make obscene gestures at motorists and follow aggressively behind the car ours And they're saying, does that mean that you have a gun, you are going to drive more aggressively? They can't say that, of course, or do you or are you? Or if you're in an aggressive driver, you're just more likely to be the same type of person I have

a gun, right, exactly interesting study though, for sure. Um, and and that that same guy actually what's his name or this other dude, Emil Cakaro, he's a or Cakaro, he's a professor. He's a professor at a University of Chicago. And he makes a great point. His advice is, don't assume the other person is like you, yeah, like they may be crazy. Don't assume they don't have a gun. Yeah, don't assume that they're rational and reasonable and that like

it can stop escalating at some point. Yeah, That's what I tell Emily all the time. I'm like, I trust you, I said, but you don't. You don't know if you flick someone off like that may be it for you. And that would really be upsetting if I lost you to road rage because you hung some crazy guy bird Like, that's the most senseless, one of the more senseless ways to die. Didn't you say yes? Okay? Which which leads definitely up there, which leads to preventing rage Chuck, which

we're gonna talk about right after this. All right, Josh, we've we've vented a lot here today. I know, even though they say that's not healthy, I do feel a cathar boy. Pair this with our traffic podcast and that's that's driving goodness. That was the breaking bubble, Yeah, the break bubble. So how can you avoid road rage? Everyone makes mistakes behind the wheel? Um, you can. And actually there was a little sidebar in here about these guys that came up with the vehicle signaling system to say

I'm sorry. It's not a bad idea because horns, depending on the horn in your car, it can sound aggressive itself, even when you do not mean it that one yea, Even that tap tap the wrong horn sounds like honk honk yep. But like, yeah, that wouldn't be a bad idea to have a little light that pops up that says sorry, and then if they don't forgive you another one that pops up. This is I said I was sorry,

one last chance. But people will figure out how to use those sarcastically, like cutting someone off and slamming on the brakes while flashing I'm sorry. Someone will someone would use it like that. I would have three lights when that says I'm sorry to that said I just said I was sorry, and three that says you're dead to me, And then they would have one that says I don't care. But then like the to me would burn out without you knowing it. It would just say you're dead. Yeah

you go, oh god, the road rage killer. All right, so everyone makes mistakes. Hold on, I did read an article all about I think afford Um executive who's in charge of the horn, like trying to figure out how to make different types of horns. So like in Europe apparently they have horns available to them. Yeah, that wasn't just Europe, that was Europe in that you just did.

So what are you saying? It can become like when you go to buy a car, I said, I want this kind of horn, Yeah, or you it comes equipped with a horn that has different functions and capabilities for different situations. That's a great idea. Like supposedly Tesla has one that's like muted for use with pedestrians so you

don't scare the Jesus out of them. Yeah sure. Um, so there's there's other ones, like a chirping one that's supposed to be friendlier, right, and then there's the the Semitruck air horn, which you can get it foot in your car that liquefies your ear canal. Yeah. My problem was with the rental cars. Their horns are always lame. Oh yeah, any like not even much of a sound. Supposedly, Hyundai released the Sonata and like it was a great car, but everybody hated the horn because they they found it

to be too wimpy. They had to like rerelease it with a better horn. I believe it. Um, do you remember did you watch a Little Miss Sunshine? No? I never saw. It's a good movie. There's a running gag that they're old beat up. B W Van has a horn that will go off occasionally, just without but it sounded exactly like my old VW Beetle had a horn that was like you cut in and out and it would for a time, whenever I took a hard left turn, it would it would go off, but it wasn't allowed.

It was just like it sounded like a dying person gasping for air. A death rattle, Yeah, a death rattle horn. Um, that's a good movie. You should check that out. Death rattle a little well, that death rattle too, and three and then little miss Sunshine, you should check out pay It Forward to see why you should stop saying pay it forward, I have no desire um. Alright, So everyone makes mistakes back to that, but you can avoid this escalation and conflict if a you don't know, you don't

do the eye contact deal. They say, that's like, just like a wild animal, don't look him in the eyes. Or wait, I thought they said, do look him in the eyes to stare him down. On what animal? Yeah, alright, like if it's a rat, stare it down. Okay, but it's a sign of aggression. Pull up someone and you look him hard in the eye, that's yeah, exactly. Keep control of your temper. That's a no brainer. Um, someone, it is a no brainer. But that's tough to do.

Sit it is, especially if you're justice spells are ringing like mine. Do like that person shouldn't get away with us, right, lady in front of me, should not get have gotten away with that? Alright? Uh, they didn't have done surveys even that showed that drivers don't think that they're being They think they're being assertive and not aggressive, so that basically there can be a lot of mixed uh communication, and your goal is to just I don't care what

they're doing. I'm not going to match what they're doing. You're It's also called being the bigger person, you know, just let it, let it go, don't let them make you hit the gas pedal. Just think about all the gas you'll save by not driving aggressively. In in return, Yeah, and Strictlan points out that will seem unnatural to you even to just say, you know what they're driving like that,

it's not my problem. They're they're a sad, angry person. Well, he also points out that they're probably under as much stress as you are. They may be late because apparently UM in follow ups to UM two aggressive driving incidents and road rage into the incidents, people frequently say they were all they were under stress outside of their car.

Already work, stress, life, stress, that kind of stuff, right, So when you carry that into the extraordinarily stressful, unnatural situation of driving a car, especially in traffic, UM it can. It can. Also you're just already set up for it. So if you step back and think maybe that person is having a rough time in their life, it will make it easier for you to just let it go

and be the bigger person. Yeah, it's a win win, And we've all been there, and I think you can admit, like, if you're just having a great day and everything's coming up, Josh, you're probably much more laid back behind the wheel, you know. But if you're super uptight about something, I think all of us fall into that trap, you know. So, so there are steps you can take to prevent falling into that trap. There's one in here that cracks me up,

but it's totally true. Listening to relaxing music. I listened to easy listening music, like basically radio the Botomy, and it actually helps quite a bit. Really, Yeah, he says, concentrating on breathing. I can't do that. Yeah, I mean, that's get bored anytime I try to just focus on my breathing. Yeah, you either get at that or not. Right, So I've opted for relaxing music instead. Uh. He recommends to get enough sleep. Um, I guess it makes sense.

Here's one that's you have to give yourself plenty of time to where you're going. Sure, don't leave late and expect to just have a pleasurable ride, right, um right, you just can't you expect the worst expect that, you know, and if you show up five minutes early, whatever, that's fine. Um,

people love punctual people. That's nice, right, Um if you if it's out of your hands, though, then you should say, Okay, I'm gonna be like not, oh god, I need to cut through all this, which is kind of like you mean is rolling on the ground laughing right now hearing me say that, because I'm like, we have to go to the airport. First of all, we have to leave two and a half hours before our flight, and I have to drive like a maniac on the way to get there, even if we have plenty of time, because

there's a you got a deadline. Yeah, you don't want to miss that flight. Nope, I get it. I get super stressed with when I know I have to fly that day because you don't know. You can look at the traffic map, but sometimes it feels like you can't leave early enough. You know. I've actually gotten a lot more relaxed on that too. I think about it. You miss like this little walking valume for me. Right, She totally chilled me out in traffic. She chilled me out

about like missing a flight and all that stuff. So yeah, I have chilled out tremendously. I still do drive aggressively sometimes. That's right. I'm gonna work in progress, Chuck, I do too, my friend, it happens. Uh. And we've already talked about avoiding venting on that can actually increase your sense of danger in frustration instead of calming you down and you're and they're screaming and yelling that that's really not alleviating anything. You know. I do know I can tell you afterwards.

Whenever I do it, I feel terrible about myself, Like I was just like quite and just that. Go. Now you look like a jackass to anybody who saw you like going? Yeah, And um, you feel like a jackass too, don't you. Yes, I do. That's what I say to myself. Uh. So let's talk a few statistics here to close, shall we? Oh wait, there's dr driving does point out one thing

that I think is probably right. One of the best ways to deal with road rage, to prevent road rage, is to teach little kids from an early age how to drive safely, how to avoid road rage, that kind of stuff. And I remember going to Safety City. Did you ever go to Safety City? If you've heard of it? Never heard of it. It It might have just been like an Ohio thing, but we had a dangerous city. It was that sounds kind of fun. Um. Safety city was

the opposite of that. There were dangerous there, but it was all like plastic miniature stuff. So like there's a jail in the center town and like it's like a tiny city, okay, um with like streets and sidewalks and all that stuff, and then buildings and all that, and then you're on your big wheel riding around learning what traffic laws are like. Really, so it's to teach kids how to drive, yes, but also how to cross the

streets safely all that stuff. But you learn about the danger of walking out in front of a car by being a car yourself and having one of your peers walk out in front of you, and like the first couple of times you try to run them down, but then you learn like, no, that's not cool because they send you to jail. Was that part of school? I don't remember what it was. I was pretty young. I just remember my dad taking me to it and being

like a decent drive away from our home. So I'm not exactly sure where it was when I went to it. I just remember it was I got to bring my big wheel, and I thought it was pretty great. That's awesome. Yeah. Yeah, it's funny to think about parents of uh and it still happens today, But it seems like in the seventies and stuff like what was going on in the car was like, oh man, far from teaching experience. Yeah, we were looking at like old um child safety seats. Yeah,

they looked like they were worse than nothing. Yeah, like this metal bar that would just cut you in two if you hit it like fast enough. I mean like these things couldn't have been safe, like an old rusty spring like pointed at your temple. Yeah, it's just bad news. Yeah. I got a you know, mistakenly flew in on this last tour to Baltimore instead of Washington, d C. So I had to take a cab. I was gonna take like a bus in a train, but I was like, na, I'm running late, I need to get in a cab.

And I got in a cab to go from Baltimore to d C. And it was the grumpiest oldest cab driver I've ever met in my life. This guy was in his mid seventies and immediately started honking at the cab in front of him at the airport and dude, this it was the perfect guy for what I needed, because he drove like a bad out of hades to get me there on time. And uh it was. It was comical and scary and awesome. Uh yeah, yeah. Yeah. People who don't put their seatbell on because they're in

a cab. It's it's like, here's your brain. Yeah. I used to not wear much in the back seat, but I've gotten better about that. You need to. Yeah. I always figure like I'll just hit the seat in front of me, right, maybe so, but you might go flying over the seat and kick the person in the front seat to death. It's not just you kick him to death. Yeah. Uh can we talk stats? Yeah, you dug out this. Uh. Cities that are the most courteous and least courteous last

year Auto Vantage survey. They did one in two thousand nine, and they did one in two thousand fourteen, and this varies from year to year, But in two thousand fourteen they listed Houston, Texas at our own Atlanta number two least courteous, Baltimore d C in Boston as least courteous, and that change from two thousand nine, which was New York, Dallas, Detroit, Atlanta. The only holdover was Atlanta, all right in Minneapolis, which surprises me. Yeah, and then how the mighty have fallen?

Baltimore in two thousand nine was the third most courteous. In two thousand and fourteen, it was the third least courteous out of like twenty five major cities. It makes me wonder what kind of study this is. To be honest, so they survey drivers who drive in rush hour traffic at least three times a week and then ask them questions that pertain to like aggressive driving and driving courtesy. Yeah it's not I mean it was a phone survey

and each participant spent about six minutes or whatever. But um, I mean it's about as legitimate as this these kind of things get because it's the study of road rage and apparently no one's serious about it. Most Doctor Driving and he can't even be serious enough to just call himself Dr James. Well he used to be Mr. Driving, so he's definitely taking a little more serious. Um, he went back to school. Most Courteous Cities last year, where

Portland isn't a or one, Pittsburgh st Louis. But Portland was also number one in two thousand nine, so they're there are chill people out there. That's been my experience. Uh, Portland, Pittsburgh, St. Louis, San Francisco, in Charlotte, North Carolina as the most courteous cities. So how about that? Yep? You got anything else? Uh? There?

I know one thing I did see, though, I was surprised um Strickland sites study that found that women and men are pretty close in aggressive driving behaviors self reported aggressive driving in road rage experiences. It's like percent of men but forty four percent of women. I would have guessed the disparity would have been a little more, but apparently road rage strikes both genders equally. I definitely see angry women out there, um and angry dudes. It's both. Yeah, yep,

so that's road rage, dude. If you guys want to know even more about roadbrage, type those words into the search part how stuff works dot com? And since I said search parts, time for listener mail. Yeah, and if we didn't impart it, settle down out there. It's dangerous. We're all trying to get by here. Everybody's got their own life stresses that they're bringing of the road a little more courteous. They didn't mean it to you personally, so don't take it personally. Josh and Chuck and Jerry.

I've seen her drive? Oh yeah, I've never seen Jerry drive. Is she like an aggressive driver? Now? Jerry drives very safely. Remember she takes crazy routes. I remember that, like I've cutting through this parking lot because this light stinks. And oh yeah, but I think that's the commute route she has just she had mastered it from Buckhead. I will do that too. Oh yeah, me too. Um, all right, I'm gonna call this wild signal from a pro. Oh cool,

Hey guys, I'm a radio astronomer. Actually, yeah right, Actually my sub field is radio transients, i e. Radio signals detected once and ever again. Wait, is this person going to debunk the wild signal right here? No, it's actually a nice email. I felt like I had to right in about the wild signal. I'm really glad I listened to the episode. She almost didn't, because you guys really did a great job nicely balancing the science and speculation. So thank you. And when I get asked in the future,

I'll be shure to refer people to your wonderful coverage. Well, thank you. I thought i'd give a few more details on it if you're interested. Um. On the it might be real side of things, it's also worth mentioning that the Big Ear telescope used to look at two points on the sky at the same time, separated by a small distance, like two separate pixels. The wild signal was detected in one but not the other, which is another good indication that it might indeed be coming from space.

On the it might be nothing side, however, some recent work that I've done actually showed that some unexplainable signals that we've detected at a radio telescope in Australia turned out to be coming from microwave ovens at the telescope site. Man made signals can sometimes interfere with radiote theoscopes and ways we don't expect, so it's hard to know something like that could have also produced a WILD signal. It's

hard to say either way. I don't have a strong opinion, to be honest, I mainly study things called fast radio bursts. But I just wanted to say great job and thanks for making my job easier rock On, Thank you rock On, and that is from Emily Petrov, originally from Portland's Thank you Emily, Oh courteous driver, probably now living in Melbourne. I don't know about Melbourne's driving and moving to the Netherlands in January. If I passed my PhD defense in October,

oh man, good luck, Emily, way to go. I hope to see you in the Netherlands. Are you know in my mind? Got you? Uh? If you want to tell us that we did a fantastic job on something that you're an expert in, we'd love to hear from you for a change. Yeah. You can tweet to us at s y s K podcast. You can join us on

Facebook dot com, slash stuff you Should Know. You can send us an email to stuff podcast at how stuff Works dot com, and in the meantime you can hang out with us that are super dope home on the web. Stuff you Should Know dot com for more on this and thousands of other topics. Is it how stuff Works dot com.