From UFOs to psychic powers and government conspiracies. History is riddled with unexplained events. You can turn back now or learn this stuff they don't want you to know. A production of iHeartRadio.
Hello, welcome back to the show. My name is Matt, my name is Noelah.
They call me Bed, and we are joined as always with our super producer, Dylan the Tennessee pal Fagan. Most importantly, you are you. You are here. That makes this the stuff they don't want you to know. No, no, yes, our yes, yes, it is true. The rumors have been confirmed. This is our weekly strange news program. If you're listening to it the evening it comes out. Welcome to Monday, October twenty eighth. We have so much to get to you. We're probably not going to get to all of it,
but that's just the beautiful problem to have. Boeing is blowing up. North Korea's up the high jinks. We got some bank stories, we got some counterfeit whale sharks, we got all kinds of stuff for you. But the first thing we have to talk about. We don't want to sound like Dick's here. Another Russian oligarc was found dead in Moscow. Quite recently, Ben saying, so do you guys know how he died?
It's the word of the day.
Cheezy, geezy.
I thought you were going to say, defended it.
I literally just guessed, Ben, I assume that's what you were pointing to, sign posting a little bit.
But is it really true?
Yes? Yeah?
How are they this unriginal? Is my first question?
Well, if you know, if you got something that works, it works right?
It doesn't doesn't that seem a little dicey though, like you could survive a fallout of a window if it was I mean, how high are we talking?
Are we talking like skyscraper window?
Yeah? And also it appears that what a terrible run of luck this guy had. When Mikhail Rogachev, who was sixty four, fell out of the window, the back of his head hit a bullet as well. So it didn't No, it didn't mean it okay, time you got.
Right time, wrong time, right place.
I don't know, it's something, but you did nail it there, Noel, Yes, unfortunately fell out of a window. The reason that we said the word of the day was cheesy. For a second, there is unrelated, much more positive experience had it at Chick fil a yesterday where I accidentally said the secret word, which was cheesy, and they gave us mac and cheese. We had a really robust Chick fil A conversation before he rolled today.
Question, did you just say it in the course of normal conversation whilst waiting in line?
I was at the counter. I was just making conversation with A.
I guess I got to know how you naturally arrived at saying the word cheesy.
Ben Ben said, how cheesy is this mac and cheese? That was his intention? You only got the cheese.
Shut up, you absol bad jokes. Give this man cheese. Well still we are we are encountering some levity. But to the point, folks, if you have followed our show at all, uh, you know that the defenestration in Russia is at this point beyond the problem. Like it's now it's a meme, isn't it not?
Since the famed defenestration of Prague have we had this level of a window throwing epidemic.
We we do realize a man has died.
Yeah, it's just.
You can't not have a little gallows humor around this pattern. It's just again I come back to, like, is there not another way? Is there not a better way? Whose idea is this is this one particular hit squad that this is just there like signature.
Move it's other intellig agencies do it as well, or criminal organizations. Because it's simple and it's relatively full proof.
You could also blame it on the individual doing it to.
Themselves, right, right, Uh, And it's just much more reliable than say, having to obtain polonium. But you can still you know, it still does signal something. You're a bullet to the back of the head. Right, You're supposed to know that. You're supposed to know who did it. You know what I mean? Wait a minute, wait, what do you mean by that?
Like it is it is?
It is meant to send a signal? And yeah, there is plausible deniability as right, Okay, right.
Exactly, And while we're talking Russia, we'll consider this our cold open and we'll finally get to the holy war. Yeah, and we're back. I've been over using the phrase holy war, you guys. It's just it's got such gravitas. But I need to stop calling every disagreement I have with someone a holy war.
I also think the term outrage has been largely overused in the press. There's a podcast I listen to called weird af News, and the dude that hosts it pointed this out and I couldn't help but completely agree, Like it is a I've got outrage over the use of the term outrage.
Yeah, it's kind of like all the political hit pieces where they use these crazy verbs like so and so slams blah blah blah. What's another one?
Well, but I guess the problem with outrage is usually used around relatively innocuous things. People are outraged over the overuse of condiments, you know.
Like yeah, yeah, people are outraged by ticket prices or by a celebrity ephemera. This Holy war is a very different thing that it is a direct quote from the nation of North Korea because they say that they are
launching a holy war against South Korea. They d as of this month, they have mobilized or they claim to have mobilized one point four million citizens, mostly young people, and also pulling folks back into serving in the military, and they're calling South Korea a nation of confrontational maniacs
and criminals. They've also destroyed roads connecting the two Koreas, which is not a great idea if you're trying to invade, because then you're just gonna have to use the tunnels, and the tunnels kind of suck for anybody who's been in them. And I think it's strange that we're seeing so much news about North Korea now because you guys saw also this is occurring in step with North Korean forces being loaned out to the Russian Army, right, we all saw that. Yep.
It's a weird feeling. It's a really weird feeling.
Ben.
I can't even tell you how little I knew about North Korea until the first time you brought it up and we had a long conversation about the DPRK and just the weirdness with their relations to other countries and the tensions that kind of ebb and flow in some weird little political machine that never really does anything. In my mind, you tell me if I'm wrong here, but in my mind, this is the first time I've seen North Korea stepping out for some kind of hot conflict.
Uh yeah, I mean there's the Korean War, but.
Well, yeah, I guess since the court Korean War. In my mind, like, yeah, when have they left and mobilized troops to go, you know, enter another country.
Yeah, exceedingly rare. And that's a good point because usually they're foreign activities away from their home soil are going to be espionage and criminal attempts, you know what I mean, like moving those counterfeit supernotes. And yeah, we shouldn't even call those counterfeit because they are higher quality than the actual US one hundred dollars bill. We'll just call them
super We just called them the soups. Yeah, this is strange, and I posit to all of us listening that the heightened tensions between DPRK and South Korea are somehow part of the ever cozier relationship between Russia and North Korea. There's a game going on, and you can kind of susus out what's happening by contextualizing the headlines. But we know that the President of Ukraine, Zelenski, recently said, look, Russia is going to be getting ten thousand North Korean
soldiers to join the war. The US has confirmed that this intel looks legit. South Korea's spy agency has said fifteen hundred troops have already arrived in Russia, could be more like twelve thousand when it's all said and done, so it sounds like they made a deal, and part of that deal was giving the cold shoulder again to their southern neighbors, South Korea. Plus you know, heavy US presence in South Korea, so it makes sense. But my question here is how often does this kind of thing happen?
Should these guys be considered mercenaries for the purpose of Geneva or should they be considered, like I mean, soldiers.
I don't know when was the last time that the Geneva Convention was like properly in forest.
I don't know.
Yeah, I hate to be irolly about that, but I just it's almost like a mood point.
Well, it's a good question.
No.
I worried that I get caught up in my own little mental gymnastics when it comes to that kind of thing, like like maybe these guys aren't, you know, officially doing this kind of thing, and maybe it's not like that, But in the end, it's the same way I feel about the United States and Ukraine and all the conflicts are going on over there, like what are the lines really when it's a official government money from any government that ends up being the thing that gets human beings
to you know, a fighting place. Ultimately it's the country.
I don't know. Yeah, it's a tough one. And this is this is one of those things where it's a conversational grenade. We're sort of tossing your way, folks. We want you to tell us what's going on, especially if you have experience in Russia or in the Koreas, and tell us if there is indeed a great game afoot. But with moving on, because we're you know, doing some rapid fire things, we'll give you some good news. Well, it depends on how you feel. ICP. That's one for
the Juggalos. They have officially endorsed.
The insane clown Posse.
Yes, yes, yes, put some respect on their name. They have they have officially given the Juggalo endorsement to a political candidate. That candidate is Harris. So this has probably ruffled a lot of feathers. They tuned. Just that's our Juggalo update. I don't know if I'm going to sound you for that. Dylan magnus oh.
I said around that video of Violent Jay on The Daily Show, reacting to I was all the candidates in like face paint, jugglo face paint oh yeah, and uh the reactionally had to Walls was Walls.
He said, didn't he say?
Who is it? I don't know, he said, I am completely opinionless.
Yes, I have absolutely zero opinion on that man's uh so, I mean the man likes fried food, you know, so I would think that would get the Juggalo seal of approval on a song.
I yeah, Well, why has neither party gotten out in front of this? Where is the accountability? Where's their fago platform? These are real questions, right, and Harris and Trump both refuse to answer to the issues.
Is Michigan a swing state?
Yeah?
Baby, it is really so obviously. I mean, Detroit is where the insane clown Posse hails from. I don't know the political makeup of Detroit. I feel like maybe because of the auto industry, it's a lot of blue collar folks who maybe.
Are more on the Republican side. I really don't know.
I just I'm trying to like think about this as an actual swear of votes. I wonder that would be really interesting if it had like the ICP effect, you know what I mean?
Yeah, Well, and you know it's it's two guys who they violent Jay and Shaggy Chagny two Dope, Shaggy too dope. Maybe at lockerheads, you know, they don't always move in step. Just because they work together will happen.
But this is they are presenting a unified front here though, right, this is the Juggalos or this is the insane clown posse.
Of the insane clown posse is the best.
Way only Violent J has made.
Okay, this is not a unilateral endorsement from the entirety of ICP.
We have it heard from J. We haven't heard from Where is violent J.
You know this?
So let us know your opinions on the pressing political matters.
Let us know I weighed in either.
Since yeah, so update us with that. And also let us do your favorite weird celebrity opinions, because I love it when someone quotes a celebrity for no reason. They just happen to be accessible to the news. It happens all the time in Atlanta. And this is no disrespect to the various musicians we've seen interviewed about things. But they'll say, oh, okay, and here's blah blah blah blah blah.
This is a very complex geo political issue and we ran into Ti the entertainer, Yes, entertainer very smart too also by the way, but with one more piece before you go to ad break, this is something we should maybe describe as we called it. And unfortunately when we make some of these predictions, they're usually about terrible things. And this is where we get to the story of Abercrombie and Fitch.
Yeah, man, don't I don't think we are the only ones who called it.
I think those ad campaigns called it.
Bro I mean, dude, well, that that's the thing. And when we even thought about it and started thinking about this thing, people have been writing about this, student telling tales about this.
The flights, I remember the flights, the flight you have to have no problem, the uniform, the uh, yeah, it was. It was already always uber creepy. But now the FBI has cracked down on uh Mike Jefferies, the former CEO, his partner Matt Smith, and a third guy named Jim Jacobson. Uh.
They have been accused of operating an international sex trafficking ring. Yeah, and further through coercion, through like getting you know, dangling the promise of becoming a model or a celebrity to give some sort and then making folks sign up for these getaways and places around the world, and then not allowing them to leave, forcing forcing certain drugs on them, like poppers and what was it poppers via agra or
something else too, then pushing them into sexual acts. So this was a salt that it's it's just way worse than I think we it assumed, right, I didn't know it had that level of structure to it. Dumb question.
Maybe is Abercrombie and Fits still a brand? Do they still have like brick and Border stores? It's still okay, it's still very much a thing.
I was been willing at the Mall of Georgia not that long ago.
And Jefferys is again former seed okay, unconnected.
And those stores, by the way, smell exactly as you remember them.
They the same they have I would hope toned down the orderline.
Pornographic kind of homo erotic nature of the ads.
Oh, I don't know about that. This was the Abercrombie kids.
You're fair enough, are you saying they have not? I mean, look, because it used to be bad.
It was like very scantily clad boys in like kind of homo erotic type situations. I'm having a hard time figuring out how to say this. But you know, the ad campaigns, it wasn't the homo eroticness of.
It that was off.
It was the like age presentation of these models.
It felt a little on the young side, and the type of cavorting that were portrayed did not feel like it was taking place from consenting adults.
Let's just put it down. Yeah, over sexualization of young men. It's the same reason. I also get the the skidders around the ideas of child pageantry.
Don't care for one bit.
Yeah do love it.
It's muddled in my mind, guys, because I think I was of the age of most of the models, at least that I remember in some of these Abercrombie spreads, right, So in a way it was like, oh, that's it's you know, they want me to look like this or that kind of thing, And I most certainly did not, But I did like their cat back in the day.
Distress whole thing, pre distressed stuff that I think I was.
Well, this is a story that has much more reporting. It's old beings. As matter of fact, by the time that you hear strange news, it's been widely reported. We hope that the victims or the survivors.
Are you do an episode on this guy, Ben?
No, but we uh we called him out a one.
I swear it was part of a larger conversation like and and I can't maybe just google it, but I know that we had a pretty in depth conversation about the flights and about like the concierge kind of and sexual acts taking place on these potentials on these flights.
I don't know it was. It was just you're you're absolutely right. We have talked about it before, and we're probably going to learn more about it with you, fellow conspiracy realist.
Ben, you talked about it in January, oh two strange News. Yeah, but but just oh my gosh, it's been that long.
Yeah, yeah, but unfortunately we called it. Maybe one evening we'll be able to predict something positive that comes to past short we have, right, we all have the best track record with positive stuff, and we do have a good track record with ad breaks. Don't believe us. Check this out.
And we have returned with a couple of minor pieces of strange and the first one I think is interesting. It's actually kind of encompasses two stories. So maybe I'm actually bringing you three. This is the case of a counterfeit whale shark has been teased in the beginning of the episode. After five years of construction and renovation, a sea park. It's a sea world. It's I guess referred to in the UK as sea park. But shin Zen's
forgiving me not a native Shines speaker. Shin Zen's Jao my Sha sea World opened to the public recently with an ad campaign surrounding a very special creature being highlighted, a whale shark. And now here in Atlanta, you know, we're very lucky to have not one, but two actual whale sharks in the Atlanta Aquarium, which is, you know, kind of a world class aquarium. We do know, and I think we've mentioned on the show before that the story behind these whale sharks is one of rescue. They
were not trafficked, they were not purchased. They were rescued from these tanks under a roller coaster in some kind of abandoned amusement park. I want to say, in Mexico, is that what you guys remember as well?
Yeah? Yeah, cool.
So we've seen them and they're beautiful creatures. They're very, very large, they are migratory mammals. They are incredibly intelligent, and they are not particularly conducive as a species to being held in captivity because of that migratory nature. Because of that, and also because of the pretty brutal shark poaching that takes place in China and other parts of the world, the importing or the trade of whale sharks
is outlawed. They are protected, and that is why apparently this Sea World didn't couldn't got one, and instead presented a robotic whale shark, which, while pretty cool, you know,
was not exactly what was advertised. That we'll get into sort of some of the pr behind it, but it led to visitors feeling completely baited and switched when they you know, walked in and we're expecting to see this you know, sentient being instead saw a three hundred and fifty kilogram, very very expensive facsimile of a whale shark swimming around.
Did it Does it look like an actual whale shark?
Yeah, it does, minus the like seams and you know, robotic accoutrement that are hard to cover up. It's impressive. Think of like the.
Shark in Jaws.
If you really saw it and you saw every aspect of it, and not just for a few minutes. You know, it's like there, you can't ignore it. It has propulsive technology, it is able to swim at relatively high speeds and maneuver. It cost millions of Chinese wand in order to build this thing, and to construct this thing, however, there seems to have been a bit of a disconnect between you know, what this thing was, what it maybe was for, and
how the exhibit was advertised. Representatives from the Sea World or from the aquarium have said that they only decided to go with the robotic whale struk because again of the ban of the laws surrounding the actual whale sharks, because they're listed as an endangered species due to again climate change, things like illegal fishing use of their meat, mentioned the shark fin soup phenomenon.
You know, in this part of the world, it's it's quite horrible.
It could really cause overfishing of all kinds of sharks. So they say they decided instead to go with this robotic version, and twofold, they also were hoping that it would create a conversation around conservation and around this type
of overfishing issues that I'm describing. The problem is I think with the way they went about it, because a lot of people felt like as this article that I found in phizz dot org pH ys dot org, really great article the case of a robot shark in a marine park raises questions about animal welfare by Elliott Dumbos. They felt catfish is the term that was used, which I guess is a bit of a sea parks pun.
You know what it reminds me of. Do you guys remember the story of the fake Pandas.
I was That's the second one that I was going to bring up in this very context. This is the second get case of counterfeit animals on display in Chinese wildlife exhibits. They were chow dogs, chow chows that were had their faces dyed black and they were painted in different ways and they were passed off as being Pandas.
I remember hearing about that one.
Yeah, it's it's pretty wild, and you know they got in big trouble for that.
On a side note, you can check out videos of the panda dogs and uh, they're just great. They're cool. But I see your point, Noel. It's it's really about how it's in a case of the robo shark and the pandas it's about how you present things to the consumers.
Oh my gosh, dude, I'm looking at the thing you just sent us to. Those are clearly dogs.
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, it's bad.
And I don't see a video of this shark situation that's been posted yet, but I have seen images, and you do kind of get a sense of like the sort of joints where the pivots, you know, of the fins and all.
Of that take place. And I didn't want to in this one.
By reading a quote from Elliott Dumbos, who wrote the piece for fizz dot org, he at the end of his article said, overall, the introduction of a robot whale shark into an aquarium, although controversial, can help engage wider audiences in conservation issues. Although misrepresenting a robot as a living whale shark is arguably unethical, anything which helps to create a space for public discussion on endangered species and animal welfare should be seen as a positive for overarching
issues of species justice. So I'm with him on that, and I'm with them if they did this as sort of like a proteste kind of piece of performance art or something, but that just doesn't seem like the way they market it and I imagine they'll be pivoting that marketing campaign moving forward after all the controverts.
Maybe the controversy was the point.
I mean, that's a good thing to say after that's caught right, Like, this was my plan all and we knew and now we've all learned a valuable lesson about both robotics and conservation as the friends we made along the way. That's true.
Last thing, countries like Indonesia, Mozambique and India also ban the fishing and trade of the particular species we're talking here, which is a considered a megafauna.
I love that term.
It's a fun term, migratory megafauna.
The species is called Rhina codin typis and they are the world's largest fish species, with a maximum recorded size of eighteen meters in length. If you do make it down to Atlanta, you can see some real ones. They are there in the Atlanta Aquaria. Am I think I've got just enough time to just mention this one, and maybe this is part of a larger discussion.
On AI and the media.
I'll just read the headline from Vanessa Gara over at the ap Polish radio station replaces journalists with AI presenters. A Polish publicly funded radio station called off Radio Crackow relaunched this week after laying off its entire staff and have pivoted to being what was a press release referred to as the first experiment in Poland in which journalists are virtual characters created by AI. There are three avatars, I guess that have been created that have their own
kind of personalities and views and topic areas. But the idea is to appeal to gen Z listeners potential gen Z listeners by having these avatars speak to cultural, art and social issues as.
Well as LGBTQ plus issues.
The head of the station, mar Chin Poult, said, is artificial intelligence more of an opportunity or a threat to radio media and journalism threat? We will seek answers to this question. How noble of them they're at Off Radio crackou guys, and just to give an alternate perspective from an actual facts journalist, A guy by the name of my TuS Demski, who is a journalist and film critic who was laid off.
From the station.
Published an open letter protesting the choice, referring to it as the replacement of employees with artificial intelligence, and saying that it is a dangerous precedent that hits us all and could lead to a world in which experienced employees associated with the media sector for years and people employed in creative industries will be replaced by machines.
Not cool.
You guys can still tell that I'm human?
Right, I think?
So? I just gotten good.
You guys both seem very human to me, So I'm just gonna assume we're all still human here.
Okay, Well, if there's anything wrong with not being human, totally.
More human than to quote Rob Zombie.
But yeah, I don't know, like they're they're framing it as this noble experiment, which I think is disingenuous.
Sure, and bullshit.
They argue that the listenership of the pre existing situation at the radio station was.
Quote close to zero. Yeah, I saw that.
And that may well be the case. And if that's the case, okay, I guess it is within their right to pivot. But it's a weird look, and I guess I'd rather see something like this attempted in a situation like this. But it's also the kind of thing you could say and then just do whatever the hell you want.
Yeah, we need to know more about the production pipeline, right, Like are these are these AI entities simply leveraging audio to repeat something that has been written for them or are they conducting you know, their own attempts to write like that terrible stuff chat GBT, so it tries to do.
I mean also, we have in full disclosure, folks, because because of the nature of our vocation, we learned a lot of the details about this kind of technology, I think a little bit earlier than some of the general public, just because we lived in that world or lived closer to it. And a lot of the AI editing and a lot of the attempts to make AI entities or
personas still fall pretty far short. Like you can when you listen to a show that has just been edited with AI, even if the speakers are human, you can tell you.
Can get a human touch to smooth out those rough cuts, literally those rough edits. All of the AI R like I have seen aiar that I find interesting, I would not say I've seen anything that moves me or I find compelling, because let's be really, all the thing that makes art moving is the human aspect.
Of it.
The thing that makes good journalism good journalism is the human eye and the human observation and the empathy that can only come from being an actual human observing the behavior of other humans. I don't think that's a controversial position.
I don't think so. There's also you know, I also don't see current large language models or you guys know, I don't even like to phrase artificial intelligence. I don't see them as this mistake. Yeah, I don't see them as the end result here, So you can't really great. This is the predecessor to something that may be capable
of amazing things in the future. But right now, if this kind of practice spreads as the current technology stands, we're going to run into the double mirror situation, which is already happening with any AI on a search engine. It's just when I say double mirror, I mean two mirrors eternally reflecting back nothing but emptiness. They're going to quote each other in a or a boros.
It's like the visual metaphor for like an echo chamber, right.
And it'll get less and less robust. Informative copy of a copy of a copy, Yes, just like Multiplicity starring Michael looking.
Let's really quickly think about the radio company's stance here, just to get our minds into it.
Right.
Sure, so these aren't crazy high paid radio hosts.
I'm assuming not.
Because this is a public radio Yes, I can imagine a company that has you know, that is paying out somebody like a like a Rush Limbaugh or you know, somebody who was really well known. You're paying millions of US dollars per year for that type of talent. Right if you could create an AI generated version of that kind of character and make it popular, you would be
saving tens of millions of dollars a year. That is not the case going on here, but it is pretty creepy to think about the way this could be thought about in the future.
It's gonna happen. You know, if you are in a public facing entertainment or education field, be very careful what you sign, because you can. We are at the place where you could resurrect a Rush Limbaugh just based on the huge collection of data of him speaking.
We already have individuals like that selling the rights to their image, Right, is it really that big of a leap for them?
I mean, you know, and this is the folk.
These are the folks that have gotten ahead of it where they're like, sure, I'll sell you my entire virtual likeness, including my personality, for a gajillion dollars, and then I can retire and I never have to talk on Mike again. That precedent will be set, that will happen, and then it'll be somebody like what you're talking about.
Then they can just go on forever. It's it's it's eternal, Howard Stern.
There are people right now as well this evening who would who are not public figures, but would gladly sell away their rights for a surprisingly small amount of money, maybe even for a free small mac and cheese at Chick fil A. Again, the word of the day is cheesy for.
The privilege of using an app bro.
Yeah, for an app right, because you are the product. I think this is something that we are going to continually return to. I also have always found Polish to be an incredibly tricky language. It's one of the most difficult to learn for Yeah, and all my friends who speak Polish. It's goingd of like people who speak Finnish. You ask them, you know, how you say something in Polish, and they just like roll their eyes and say, let's just stick with English.
Jojo Siwa was recently clowned, as she typically is, on the internet, for attempting to sing one of her songs in Polish, and Polish posters were like, I.
Have no idea what the hell she was.
You're in JoJo's corner. I know, I do feel bad. She tried real hard, but I don't try.
I don't know who she is. And when you guys, she was the girl with the big bows.
They sell her bows at the Walmart.
She was like a little like ponytail, teeny bopper type, you know, pop princess.
And now she's trying to be a bad girl. She's sort of rebranded.
In my head, this is somebody who's been in the spotlight since they were a tiny She's she's rand well and she's still learning who she is and what the world is I mean, and she's just doing it in front of everybody. And that is an awful.
Position to be. And I'm not trying to punker to art.
I just mentioned the Polish thing because it is That's where I learned this fact that the Polish apparently incredibly difficult.
Also, you know, I wish Jojo the best. I don't have a stance really on that's I think people worship celebrities in a way that is just disappointing and gross. But but you know, it's tough to make it in the world of music. So I, you know, absolutely wish everybody the best. Every musician is not a jerk.
Oh and yeah, I do wish hich are the best, and I hope she doest. That was the very empathetic way of putting it, and that is no unrelated to the story.
But I think an interesting side conversation just the same.
So, guys, I think we ran a little long with these two. Maybe we're a little more robust than I realized. But let's take a quick break here, a word from a sponsor, and then come back to you with another piece of strange news.
And we've returned. Guys, we're gonna get into some fiscal responsibility right now. How does that make you feel?
I'm a fisco sexual. Let's do it.
Let's get physical, physical, physical, get physical.
All right, We've got some news for you. We have talked about many in a whoopsie that banks have done in the past, or I guess more of a whoopsie.
You caught us Yeah, check out Jeffrey Asthmus. Great peace on Wells Fargo. Oh, I'll send it to you guys.
Yeah, on all of them, basically all the banks that we've ever talked about on this show, and it's most of them. Every once in a while, you get caught doing something you're not supposed to be doing, an you gotta either pay a little money. Usually you don't have to say we did anything like as a bank, you don't have to admit guilts. You just have to pay a nice little fine and then continue making billions and billions of dollars cheese and crackers.
You guys, we didn't know that was illegal.
We did.
I didn't know I couldn't do that.
Golly g Willickers. We were just trying to bank. Is that so wrong?
Yeah?
Yeah, Well that's it. That's all they were trying to do is make bank. Well, here's some news out of the BBC. It's actually coming out of the Justice Department and a bunch of other places, but we're gonna be reading from some stuff Natalie Sherman wrote on BBC on October tenth. The article Natalie wrote is titled TD Bank Maybe you've heard of them? TD Bank find three billion dollars US in historic money laundering settlement.
Historic.
That's why we're talking about this because otherwise.
The borderline meaningful even for a bank, right, wouldn't you say? Or no, almost so close to verging.
On it's edging on meaningful.
Gooning. Meaning that's true there TD Bank.
As we're gonna about to find out, it has been gooning in one particular way for a long time. So TD Bank, it's one of Canada's largest lenders, according to Natalie, and you know, just by the facts, they've agreed to pay more than three billion dollars. And this is the historic part. Three billion is historic. But the other thing that's historic is that they're pleading guilty to criminal charges, including conspiracy. Guys, like actual facts conspiracy and the stuff
they're pleading guilty to. Actually, let's go and jump to the Justice Department, like precisely so we get this right, Yeah, yeah, The Justice Department says TD Bank NA is pleading guilty too conspiring to fail to maintain an anti money laundering program that complies with the Bank Secrecy Act. So they are conspiring to fail, isn't that interesting?
Yes, they're letting something they're quietly sabotaging.
Yes, they're also conspiring to fail to file accurate currency transaction reports, and the big one conspiring to launder money. But again, everybody's doing that. But this is really interesting. I think that concept of conspiring to fail to do something, it's striking to me because it really is people somewhere at the top who are building the system, the structure of how the bank functions, getting together and saying, I think we got to just not look so hard at some of this stuff.
Yeah, they bought themselves a larger window of time, right, Yes, because every day that they can avoid the internal regulatory process is another day that they can wash the money.
Yes, another day for an entire decade.
Matt Merrick Garland, the Attorney general who prosecuted the case, said that they basically made their services convenient for criminals, and doing so became one themselves.
Can you give us a little bit of a sense.
Of how like they what they did was more egregious or different than what other banks are and we're doing.
They conspired to basically just allow massive transactions to occur when they shouldn't be occurring without being immediately reported to authorities.
Okay.
There was one customer who used TD bank to launder more than four hundred and seventy million dollars in drug proceeds, making large cash deposits and bribed staff with gift cards. There was there was one person that was found. I'm gonna have to find it in here. They were making daily million dollar transactions just like in and out and in and out and in and out, and it was an individual, and.
They weren't reporting this to whom is it supposed to be like the irs, Like I think it's five thousand dollars, like you know, anything above ten thousand, ten thousand, Yeah.
Yeah, and that's that's US laws. Just like here in the US, Canadian financial institutes like this are required to report these larger suspicious transactions. It reminds me of when HSBC literally built different windows at their physical locations so they could help launder drug money faster.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It was basically just saying we're gonna allow all this stuff just to happen. And then as as organized criminals who are very organized and making lots of money, as they realized, oh keys, we can just put this in TD Bank and we're good to go. And then we can just take it back out at TD Bank and it's no longer drug money. It's TD Bank money, which
is crazy to think about. But there were other things happening where TD Bank was allowing funds to go directly back to people who were producing fentanyl, which is one of the really crazy things that the investigation found. So people were again just they weren't following the money, they weren't reporting on any of the transactions. And here it is.
Prosecutors said it operated with inadequate guards against money laundering for nearly a decade, failing to act even when staff flagged obvious cases that there were people abusing the bank and doing this kind of illicit trading of money and exchanges and financial transactions, and the bank is like, no, no, nah, we're good. It is the biggest fine ever under the anti money laundering law. And oh, here's the thing. The chief executive at TD Bank said, we take full responsibility
for failing to do this. Here's three billion dollars. They're only being the Justice Department one point eight billion dollars. They're also paying finn Send. Remember fin Send guys, we talked about them. That is the Financial Crimes Enforcement Network they are getting one point three billion dollars for their trouble. I guess, well, I mean to fund basically this massive investigation that all of these there's so many humans involved
in investigating this stuff. They're all it'll I guess take care of their salaries as well as hopefully fund these types of investigations in the future.
My favorite thing in this article, Matt, you probably clocked it as well, the mention of TD Bank's slogan America's most Convenient bank and the fact that employees basically was an end joke that this was in fact marketed towards criminals.
Yeh yeh oh. This was the thing. This is when we're talking about fentanyl. This was the thing. It's not It wasn't about money necessarily coming into the bank from the people who were producing the fentanyl. It was people who were buying the fentanyl, and then the money that they put into the bank, they could use the transactions there I guess, through online banking or something to go directly back to the people who were producing the fentuinyl in China and Mexico and other places.
Yeah, and messing with the international level brings a whole other layer of crime and skullduggery here. It's also it still only confirms what we have said multiple times in previous exploration. When the punishment, the financial punishment for a crime is less than the total profit you make from the crime, then it simply becomes a business cost. Right. Yeah, And this is I think there's another example of this, Matt.
Since this has reached, you know, this criminal level, and since the big wig said, we take full responsibility whatever that means, what do you see as next steps here? Will will the bank collapse? Will it continue?
Oh, it's going to continue. Barat Musrani, who has run the bank for a long time, is stepping down. Uh, that's one of the.
Main guys has to fall on the sword.
Yeah, the bank is going to have a third party that's going to basically monitor everything it does for the next three years according to the Justice Department.
Who's going to continue banking with these folks? Though?
Like, it's got twenty seven million or more than twenty seven million customers worldwide, it's a huge bank.
You don't, I mean, I guess we know that. Wells Fargo, despite their shenanigans, they didn't like lose a bunch of customers how I still bank with Wells Fargo full disclosure, And I'm embarrassed to say that, and I'm very seriously rethinking that. But it's so inconvenient to change banks that I think a lot of this stuff just you know, of course they're crooked.
They're the bank yep I.
Bank with an evil leprechaun. Yeah, he lives out on the west side.
At least get at least you get the little taste of that pot of gold.
What kind of security is going on with this leprechaun?
It's massive, It's crazy. We could get selkies, you know, uh, trees that you can't call enset. Look, man, I don't want to get canceled in the in the fay community. And this is not up to you, Ben. You know that's up to the yes, uh, and that's their prerogative. But I I know it's it's a dumb example and
I'm kind of punchy today. But the thing we have to remember with a lot of the system of finance overall is that it's easier for these folks to get away with crimes than it is for an individual to get away with crimes because the regulatory bodies are often compromised. That's unfortunately and just true. And money is a heck of an incentive for people to commit we you know, the Justice Department saying conspiracy, this could be also described as crimes of negligence.
Well, and you know, my initial reaction was awesome, the bank's are finally getting taken to task and this is a lot of money. And I asked, Matt if it was meaningful, and you said it was just on the edge of meaningful, and that the bank will continue. And I just don't understand how that's allowed to happen. But I guess it's just capitalism.
Baby. You got a right to exist.
You know, sure you made some mistakes were made, but you've atoned, you paid your your ultimately paltry fine.
What was the big number, Matt, It was truly.
The big number was eighteen point three trillion dollars worth of transaction activity through the bank, believe.
It right, which means that some of that money could be counted twice because it's go because of how it's moving. But still it is. It is crazy, man. Also, there's the other side of this that we haven't talked about, which is for governments, they have to reasonably think when they're meeting out penalties and punishment, they have to reasonably think about the possible larger economic consequences, right, Like if you drive the bank into oblivion, what happens to all those customers?
How much of our society runs on illicit drug trade seriously a lot that we just don't even know about, and it's just occurring, and the money is changing hands, people are benefiting, and then it moves all the way up through politics, like oh god, that I mean, there are there's so many fictional stories about that, right, and then we get to see little glimpses through the glass with something like this, well.
Especially with all the limits that have been taken off political donations, and that's almost a way of laundering money in.
And of itself.
It's a way of exercising you know, that soft power I guess you call it, like over the course of business and events and regulations.
I just can't believe how far we allowed.
That to go.
Whatever your political leanings are, I don't think anyone's super stoked about this. Unlimited money corporations are people mentality.
I just think it's at least united. Is such a grift and even just reading the legalistic parkour that some of the smartest minds in the US had had to bulst their way through to try to make it sound like it was not an absolutely Unamerican, unhinged idea. It's it's disappointing, which is worse than being outraged. Right in this case, it's like, it's like the thing I do now if I'm in traffic, I don't get angry. I don't really. I don't have the emotional depth for that
kind of stuff. But I've found what hurts people most is not giving them the anger. It's making eye contact, pointing at them and giving them a thumbs down.
Oh, It's like I wouldn't like that.
That's why I do the cyber trucks and.
Saying you're weird.
Man.
You know what. My girlfriend yesterday pointed out that it ain't cool, it weird. It's been co opted in that way. I like weird. We have a sign hanging in our living room that says stay weird, and it just feels like it's been taken from us.
I don't I don't care pass you know what I mean? All things pass? Uh. The weird was weaponized briefly for one election and the time the next election comes around, they'll just have a different word.
Yes, they will.
He'll be he's sporty.
I was gonna say he's chee cheesy.
Macari for everyone, free macaroni.
But one last thing, I just want to say, guys, the thing is what we need to do. This is my platform. I'm gonna run for Motus next in the four years. No, uh, legalize all drugs as has been proposed before. Allow the current cartel forces that exist throughout the planet to become corporations oh yeah, and sell their products. Make sure there are taxes, like heavy taxes apply to all drugs that exist that are all legal now, and
remove all other forms of taxes. As we found human beings love some drugs, sure, and they're gonna consume them, right, we only tax the drugs from now on.
But that's a great idea. I don't think it'll work, not because of any ethical concerns, but because drugs are I would argue drugs are taxed illicit drugs through the bribery system, so they're paying tax to specific corrupt individuals, right, And that's a good argument we can make with the drug dealers, because we'll say, look, now you're just you're still paying the same viig. You're just paying it.
To a government and you have more real, enforceable protection as opposed to hoping that the bribes work out.
In your favorite Oh, we're speaking of bribes. I wanted to mention this. I didn't know. We didn't get to it. But you guys read about Elon Musk's plan to pay people one hundred bucks a pop in Arizona to vote. Story for another day, But that that reminds uh Dylan's entering the chat. We touched the nerve. Dylan wants us to know that one point eight billion is less than one percent of eighteen trillion.
Yeah. Yeah, when you consider the scale of the actual crime, this isn't mean any more meaningful than any of the other wrist slap type fees.
Finally, well, let's just put this That eighteen trillion number isn't all you know, drug money and illicit funds. It's just all the money that is not being looked at.
Yeah, and some people smoke tobacco and bongs. I'm sure right, Yeah.
Sometimes it's called a hookah.
Yeah, that's what you say at the store. But the do you guys remember that when you had to you had to play that song. Dance at the head shop a tobacco water pipe.
Yeah, oh what webbs we weave all right, nark.
We webs we weave cheesy, cheesy stuff. As we moved through Halloween, Matt, do we have a takeaway on the bank here? I think we've outlined a lot of the problems, and the most damning thing being, of course, that the bank will continue. There's no takeaway, just dine in only.
Yes, sure, that's it at your local chick fil a.
Oh gosh, what a weird adventure we've been on. Join us later in the week, folks. We will be returning with episodes. We'll have listener mail. We've got some very strange stuff on the way for you, which may not be appropriate for all listeners. You'll see what we're talking about. Just to heads up. In the meantime, give us your takes on this stuff. Tell us about the DPRK North Korea,
your favorite robo shark. We also had some really interesting conversations about the post office that I think we'll get to later, but for now, drop us a line. We try to be easy to find on the internet.
Yeah, that's right, you can find us the handle Conspiracy Stuff where we exist on.
You too, where you can peruse videos.
Of our faces containing facsimiles of our voices telling you stuff about things. You can also find that handle on xfka, Twitter, and on Facebook where we have our Facebook group Here's where it gets crazy. On Instagram and TikTok. However, we are Conspiracy Stuff Show.
Do you like to call people? Call us? Our number is one eight three three std WYTK. When you call in, give yourself a cool nickname and guess what that's really all you got to do? Please let us know if we can use it on the air or not. Your message that is in your voice and all that stuff. Once you've done all that, say whatever you want. You got three minutes. If you've got more to send us, maybe a link or two, maybe an attachment that has
your Kiddykat's face on it. Man, why not instead send us a good old fashioned email.
We are the entities that read every piece of correspondence we receive, and we cannot wait to hear from you. Specifically, send us your secret words, your arcane text. Tell us a story as we gather around the digital campfire. Take us to the edge of the rabbit hole. We'll do the rest. And we also want to give a thanks to everybody's been writing in. Our email has been blowing up like a Boeing satellite, and we couldn't be more
pleased with that. Be well aware, yet unafraid. Sometimes the void writes back, We'll see you out there in the dark. Conspiracy at iHeartRadio dot com.
Stuff they don't want you to know is a production of iHeartRadio. For more podcasts from my heart Radio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.