Brittney Carbone (00:02):
I was really actually in the food from a young age. I was a total sugar addict, and when there were hard things, I would hide in the cupboard. We had a walk-in cupboard and I would eat sugar. That's what I would do. That was how I coped. And when I wrote my story out, I realized that it was just spoonful’s of sugar or lemon and sugar. It was just sugar, sugar, sugar.
Michelle MacDonald (00:35):
Welcome to the show. I'm really excited today to be able to introduce you to a very special friend of mine, fellow FMG, pro Fitness model. Brittney Carbone. She's also a top health coach. She is a professional fitness and bikini model. She's an addiction recovery advocate. So this gal went through the heart herself and went on to become a top coach and athlete. She's really gone through so much and she teaches other women how to do it as well. She's also a phenomenal motivational speaker. I'm really excited to have you guys listen to what she has to say. We're going to dive into some pretty great strategies for dealing with emotional eating or other addictive behaviors. She's going to share with you some of what she personally went through and I hope you have a lot of take homes from the show. Let's dive in. Welcome to the show.
Brittney Carbone (01:32):
Oh my gosh, Michelle, thank you so much for having me. This was actually on my vision board. I don't doubt it. I'm so glad to be here.
Michelle MacDonald (01:41):
It's on my vision board board too.
Brittney Carbone (01:43):
Yes, I love it. It's awesome and I'm really, really grateful to be here.
Michelle MacDonald (01:47):
We've known each other for, what, four years now or something? Feels like five.
Brittney Carbone (01:51):
Yeah, I guess it's been probably five
Michelle MacDonald (01:54):
Quite a while from those first very assisted, not full range of motion leg presses to you are like hips on the floor. Girl, you and JJ on that hack squat machine and evolve into,
Brittney Carbone (02:09):
I love it. One of my favorite things was when you were like, no strip or booty, no stripper booty when I was squatting.
Michelle MacDonald (02:16):
That sounds like something I would say your form now is just insane. I loved it. It's like you've become an elite athlete over the years and this year you won a crown and you really, and maybe we can touch on that too, this never ending journey to becoming the best version of yourself. And it's like every year we can all reach a new level when we live like that.
Brittney Carbone (02:40):
Absolutely. Absolutely.
Michelle MacDonald (02:43):
So let's dive in. So I really want the listeners today to be able to take home some really great actionable strategies that they could implement and addiction or self-sabotage. The behaviors that we would call sabotage behaviors. They exist on a spectrum and on the one end we can have the full on alcoholism, food addiction, eating disorders, all of that that require therapy and et cetera. And then we have that gray area that a lot of us reside on where we keep throwing a monkey wrench into the wheel and we wish we wouldn't do that. And so what I want people to listen to are what could you do? What are some resources that are available if you are hitting rock bottom and you need a helping hand? So I want to touch upon that because your journey started there. And what about people more in that gray area? What are some actionable strategies and skills that they could take away after listening to you, the powerhouse on these things? So I really want that to be evident. How does that sound?
Brittney Carbone (03:52):
Sounds amazing. I'm very excited.
Michelle MacDonald (03:54):
Alright, so let's start with the juicy goods. How did you get started on this journey? What was that critical moment when you realized I can't do this anymore, I need help?
Brittney Carbone (04:04):
Yes. Honestly, I feel like there's so many critical moments, but for the sake of time, I will give you the good ones. I think I came out of the womb a little restless, irritable, and discontent. And who me? And when I was young, I was really actually in the food from a young age. I was a total sugar addict. And when there were hard things, I would hide in the cupboard. We had a walk-in cupboard and I would eat sugar. That's what I would do. That was how I coped. When I wrote my story out, I realized that it was just spoonfuls of sugar or lemon and sugar. It was just sugar, sugar, sugar. And they thought, oh, she has a DD. And I'm like, well, was it a DD or was it sugar? As I got older, when I got into high school, I started to feel a real uncomfortability in my skin, a deep sense of self-consciousness and really thought about myself a lot and how people perceived me.
(05:10):
And I felt this feeling of, I like to say I felt fat even though fat isn't a feeling. And I look back at photos and it's funny, it's interesting that I would think that, but I had such a feeling of just uncomfortability in my body. So I found alcohol when I was about 15, I believe, and I remember the exact moment and a bottle was being passed around and I took a drink and I remember feeling this warm feeling and that I remember feeling, I want to do this all the time. This is it. This is the feeling. I felt freedom. Fast forward. I had some consequences. I showed up to soccer practice drunk. I didn't drink every day. It was drink on the weekend. I did play soccer. I was in student government. I did all the things that you're supposed to do and my grades were fine. High school was a lot of drinking, blacking out. I was a blackout drinker from the gate, remember nothing. Not a brownout, not a kind of sort of remember it was. Can
Michelle MacDonald (06:19):
You explain that a little bit in case people don't understand what you mean by that? You were a blackout drinker from the start?
Brittney Carbone (06:26):
Yes.
Michelle MacDonald (06:26):
What is a blackout drinker?
Brittney Carbone (06:27):
Well, it turns out I have no off button. So once I start to drink it's game on a blackout drinker is someone when they drink, they keep drinking and then they don't remember anything. So I would remember nothing. I would remember maybe the first couple drinks and then it was blacked out, completely gone. And part of me believes that maybe that was my body, possibly repressing things. Things came out the longer I've been sober, but your brain just shuts off. So it completely shut off. And I had a lot of that. So it was continuing and I wouldn't drink that often, but when I did drink, I couldn't stop even if I had a firm resolution that I would. So I would go out with the intention of being this classy, cute girl in Malibu having a glass of wine and it would end up with me climbing over the bar, drinking, taking shots, or doing whatever. So what was the turning point for you?
Michelle MacDonald (07:30):
It sounds like you were really doing a regular with masking, right? You were very functional.
Brittney Carbone (07:34):
It was very functional. I mean functional. I did a lot of changing groups of friends. So I would hang out with different groups of friends in order to kind of mask it and the commonality of it. The common theme was people would say, well, she doesn't drink that often, so that's why she's so crazy when she does. But I was very good at shifting groups to be able to keep drinking the way I wanted to without people noticing. I had quit drinking for 30 days and I went on a work trip. I was like, I think I need to stop. Something had happened that wasn't uncommon. I blacked out again and I thought, okay, I should quit drinking. So I quit drinking for 30 days and then I was in Breckenridge, Colorado for work, and I was offered drink tickets for free. Well, I'm an alcoholic so I got free drinks.
(08:24):
So I was like, well, it's going to be fine. I'll have a couple fast forward. I don't remember being in a snowbank, but some people found me in negative 17 degree weather and took me to their Airbnb or their house or whatever. I woke up the next morning and had no idea where I was. I walked out into the living room and there was a girl sitting on the couch and I'm crying, I have no idea where my things are. I have no idea what happened. And she just looked at me and said, don't worry, sweetie. I wake up in random houses all the time. And for some reason that moment I was like, I'm the girl that wakes up in random houses. That is who I've become. And I was eight hours late to work. I googled blacking out. Long story short, I went to chat room meetings and a guy in there was like, you need to go to a true recovery group. So that is what I ended up doing in 2008.
Michelle MacDonald (09:23):
Wow, that's crazy. You're lucky you survived. I mean, thank God that there were some good Samaritans that didn't judge you and just took care of you.
Brittney Carbone (09:32):
Right. Oh, it makes me really emotional. I'm incredibly indebted to an unbelievable amount of people that I will never remember.
Michelle MacDonald (09:40):
And so you found this recovery group, you got started. What was that like? I know you gained that 65 pounds. Where in this journey does that happen? So you had the light bulb moment. Thank God you hit the rock bottom. Like head first. Yes, head first. That's Britney head. Literally yes. With all my heart. Let's go down. And then you joined the recovery group And then What happened with that? And then what happened with the 65 pounds?
Brittney Carbone (10:13):
So I got into the recovery group. I named the ism that I have and I got freedom. I felt like, oh my gosh, this is my problem. It's like a peanut allergy. I have a problem. And now there's a solution. They outlined some ways to get recovered and that helped me kind of get free with the alcohol. Now, why I prefaced with the food as a child is food was my first addiction. So now I've got whack-a-mole, put down the alcohol, and I've picked up the food because I have a lot of unresolved emotions and things I'm dealing with. So the ism was still alive and well. So I, I went on the road for work. This is about three years into my recovery from alcoholism. And I go on the road for work. I've got no recovery community, and I'm traveling every three days to a new state.
(11:04):
I'm on an expense account, they're giving me free meals, and I just start binging, binging. And I mean 10,000 calories just going at it. And I felt so out of control and I was so secretive. I thought I kept telling people, oh, something's wrong with my thyroid. I must have an issue. And I'm not saying that people don't have thyroid issues, but I kept going to the doctor and being like, something's wrong. What's wrong? Because I wanted a reason other than my actions. And so I gained the weight. I came back from that trip and I was like, I don't know what is going to happen because I'm going to surely drink again. Because remember, my main issue was uncomfortability in my skin. So now I'm at a weight I've never been, and it was actually closer to 75 pounds and I was out of weight. I had never been, and now I'm stuck in this body and no eject button. Alcohol was my eject button, food was my eject button. But now I'm stuck and I've got nothing. And I knew the food wasn't working anymore.
Michelle MacDonald (12:07):
So what next? What did you do?
Brittney Carbone (12:10):
So then I got honest with my mentor and I tried a series of crash diets, cleanses 500 calories for 40 days. Any quick fix, I want it out and I want it out now. So once I hit rock bottom with the diets, then it was like, let's try something that you've never tried before. And when my mentor said that, I thought, oh, she's going to give me a diet pill. And she said, why don't we try moderation? And I was like, oh, I don't know that. That is not my style. And so then we went on that journey and then I found macros and I found out that food isn't moral. I found out you could have a little bit of something and then shift things around. It became more of a game. I took the morality out of it. The morality was the big thing. I was either perfect or I was reckless. Finding the balance between and then not feeling shame or guilt about having a piece of bread was a huge aha moment for me.
Michelle MacDonald (13:17):
A lot of that's an internal shift, right? Because you can have two gals doing the same action, but depending on what the frame is or what her perspective is, how she's looking and evaluating what she's doing, you can have radically different biochemical responses even to the food.
Brittney Carbone (13:36):
Yes,
Michelle MacDonald (13:37):
A hundred percent. So what was going on in terms of you talking to yourself and shifting your narrative, and I'm sure you're working with your sponsor as well through this. How do you go from being all or nothing, black or white? I'm a good girl. I'm a bad girl to moderation. So what did you do to get there? Maybe we're going to get into the meat of the conversation, which is what can people do when they're going through what you went through?
Brittney Carbone (14:07):
Well, she said something to me, she said, what are the foods that trigger you? And I was like, well, anything that's good. I'm like, is it good because I want more. Remember I'm a creature of more. It was also reframing that and saying, am I a creature of more or is that who I've always told myself I am? Yeah,
(14:27):
I think with alcohol, alcoholism for me is a genetic thing and that's my experience. I'm not going to ever mess with that. But something she said was alcoholism, alcohol is easy to put down because you put it down and you leave it food. You have to take the tiger out of the cage three or four times a day, walk it around and put it back in the cage. That's a different game. So she said, what are the foods that trigger you? And then I came up with this idea of the stoplight strategy and getting really clear on the foods that really triggered me. And not just the foods, but the behaviors or the scenarios. So what are the foods that when I eat, I go, I know I'm buying it. We all know when we're in the store. If you're someone who struggles with overeating, if you struggle with overeating or you're walking in that grocery store and you're like, I'm buying this and I know I'm kidding myself that I'm not going to eat the whole package.
(15:27):
If you are someone who struggles with that, and I had to get really honest about that, here are the foods that when I buy them, I know the truth because we all have some level of self-honesty. There is denial. But what is the truth about that? Also, what are the situations? What are the behaviors? So for me, it was at one point all sugar. I ate no sugar for two years. I was like, I can't do it. It's not going to happen. That ended up shifting as my relationship with food changed, but I got really clear on the foods that triggered me, the behaviors. So eating while standing, eating while over the kitchen sink, getting too hungry was a big trigger for me. Letting myself go between meals too much. Eating in the car was a big one for me. Emotionally. When I was stressed or depressed, I had to have my barriers up and say, okay, am I willing to eat my planned meal or am I going to start grabbing things because that binging has that grabby energy. And then just getting the real honesty about what are the things that are triggering and what are you trying to run from? Because overeating or binging is my experiences that it's a product of trying to stop stuff, emotions down.
Michelle MacDonald (16:49):
So just so I'm getting this straight, it sounds like for you when you shifted from alcoholism to being a binge eater and then shifting from being a binge eater to someone who is able to eat in moderation, the key part of that shift for you was through the development of this stoplight strategy?
Brittney Carbone (17:17):
A hundred percent. A hundred percent. And I'll be honest, oh god, a lot of the foods, so there's green light foods, and I'll touch on that really quickly. So foods that make you feel good, they light you up, you feel no digestive issues. That's the physical response. And then things that don't trigger you, that's also there's a green light things I'm not going to binge on asparagus. It's a green light and maybe someone else would. And that's why it's individual and then behavior. So sitting down and eating is a very green light behavior. I don't go unconscious when I'm sitting down and eating with no distractions because normally binging is an unconscious behavior or you go unconscious, it's like blackout eating, and then there's yellow light foods, and those are the things that sometimes can create, you create that overeating desire. Most of my red, I would say actually all of my red light foods have moved.
Michelle MacDonald (18:13):
What would be a yellow behavior and then what would be a yellow food for you? It's very individual, as you said.
Brittney Carbone (18:22):
Okay. What
Michelle MacDonald (18:23):
Used to be
Brittney Carbone (18:24):
Used be, I would say what used to be, okay, so things like bread baskets. At a restaurant, I would obsess over how much bread I could take and how much everyone else has taken. And it would just be like sometimes I could have a piece and sometimes I would just be like, should I take more or should I leave it? And it would create this kind of obsessive thinking and worry about what everyone else was doing. So that's definitely something else was eating out of a bag. So if I was to eat chips out of a bag, so
Michelle MacDonald (18:57):
That would be a behavior
Brittney Carbone (18:58):
Behavior. A behavior would be eating out of a bag was a yellow light for me. It was just that am ambiguity of it. What am I eating? How much should I eat? The confusion eating in the car was definitely a yellow light for sure. So sometimes I could go unconscious, sometimes I wouldn't. So maybe you could eat in the car
Michelle MacDonald (19:20):
If you were eating a green light food.
Brittney Carbone (19:21):
Yes, exactly. Exactly. So it would be fine. I still don't love eating in the car. I like to sit down and eat. I feel more satiated if I'm with my meal versus the scrolling scroll zombie and running from here and there. Now of course, we live very busy lives, so it's not always the case, but I try to eat most of my meals sitting down. I just feel like it's a little more self-loving for me.
Michelle MacDonald (19:47):
So I like it. We've got these two buckets, we've got food, and then the other bucket is behaviors. And then we're further dividing those into subcategories of green, no problem eating or doing this thing. Amber could be a problem potentially. You got to think it through a little bit more. And then the red, which is that's the no fly zone. You can't do these things. You can't eat these things for now. And that's an important add-on, right? For now. For now, because we always want to assume that one day we will be able to navigate much more freely as our journey continues. So what would be a red light behavior? Absolutely, you can do this thing.
Brittney Carbone (20:34):
I would, I mean, standing and eating was a big one for me because it was just like, I think most people can identify with this maybe, or maybe it's just me and my clients, but it's like when you're in the kitchen, you're looking for salty or crunchy or sweet, and it's like you're looking for the perfect little cocktail of things that grabbing different things out of the refrigerator and not making a meal. That was a big red light for me,
Michelle MacDonald (21:04):
Just
Brittney Carbone (21:05):
Grabbing, that's great. It's perfect. And then a secret eating, that's something I don't want to forget. So hiding food and saying, oh, I'm going to get a salad. I would do this. I would get a salad with you and then I'd stop at Del Taco on the way home. So much of my food addiction was rooted in shame, which is also why macros gave me a lot of freedom because I'm like, this is just the truth. Here's what happened and leave it. This is it. And so I tracked my food. That's a tool I would say tracking your food no matter what and sharing it with someone and saying, this is just what I did. This is not who I am, and it doesn't matter. The more that I did that, I just released it. I'm like, this is just what happened. And slowly my food did start to clean up. The shame was gone.
Michelle MacDonald (21:58):
I'm curious if you were doing something else at the same time, is tracking your food? Because a lot of gals that are still really deep in the struggle have a lot of anxiety around that. It actually causes a lot of stress. So was there something else that you were doing, or was it just that you were at a place in your journey personally where you were ready for that level of accountability and that was very freeing versus creating more anxiety and stress?
Brittney Carbone (22:28):
I would say in the recovery program that I'm in, we do some actions and I'm being vague because I need to be and in that recovery group, and if someone wants to DM me and ask me what that is, I will gladly share it with you. But we do a lot of internal work in there and it's a spiritual program, and for me, a lot of it was turning my life over to a higher power. It doesn't necessarily mean the standard God, but universe, source energy, higher power, whatever you want to call it. I was just ready to be done. And so I still struggle with anxiety from time to time, but the more internal work I've done, it's just the dial. The volume has turned down dramatically. So I was definitely working the program that I was in
Michelle MacDonald (23:20):
At the same time. At the same time. I think that's important to highlight because we can focus too much on simple tools and strategies, but ultimately that deeper work, that deeper mindset work has to get done. I always say, you got to fall in love with falling in love with yourself. You got to learn to Love yourself.
(23:43):
Yes, really love yourself, meaning unconditional love, loving yourself despite imperfections and holding space to believe that anything is still possible, you've got to hold onto that just as you would for your best friend or your kid. Hopefully, no matter, no matter what happens, there's always that plot twist available just around the corner. If we keep trying to get 1% better.
Brittney Carbone (24:14):
And I think that that self-love develops as you take self-loving action, the more it's like I keep putting a little tick in the bank of self-love. And as I do that, as I track the food, for me, that's self-loving action. As I show up for the training, as I show up to the recovery group or the group of peers who are aligned with what I desire for my life, as I do my meditation, as I pray or what journal, every time I do those things, I start to know myself as a new person. And then it's just who you become. So you get to become this new person and you're like, damn, I'm actually kind of cool.
Michelle MacDonald (24:53):
I dunno about you, but I feel gals that struggle the most with overcoming sabotage behavior are the ones that struggle the most with loving themselves, loving themselves and really being honest.
Brittney Carbone (25:10):
And I was that person, Michelle. And it wasn't until I changed my behaviors, which is really hard because we see you love yourself, and it's like, well, how can I love myself if I'm not taking self-loving action? It had to act myself into self-love. It wasn't going to come. And then it's like, oh, this is coming for me, my experience. I couldn't learn to love myself and then take the action I had to show up as a person I wanted to be, and then I started loving myself. That was my experience maybe as everyone's
Michelle MacDonald (25:41):
Different. And then for you doing that, was doing a recovery program, working with a sponsor, somebody who you could be accountable to.
Brittney Carbone (25:52):
I
Michelle MacDonald (25:52):
Think also you talk a lot about community, being part of a community for whom being honest, doing the introspection, using the language of self-love, right? That's normal versus what are you doing? That's weird, right? It's normal to have's normal, these deep conversations. Yeah. Yeah. You want to talk a little bit about that because I think this is important. Like I said, for people that are at that rock bottom or who are really struggling in that messy middle, what could they do? So recovery program, I think. But could you want to give a couple of other, just so they have clarity, a couple of other clear skills strategies it sounds for you in this chicken and egg, what did do first? Actions.
Brittney Carbone (26:39):
Actions. So I think we were talking about this off camera, but it's like getting in a group of people who are doing what you desire to do. Because when we're surrounded by people, if you're surrounded by a bunch of people who are complaining, you're going to complain. It's just going to happen. That's why TT WW is so successful because you're in a group of women who are crushing it and the language is how can we get better? Even me signing up with jj, I met JJ and I didn't know him, but I just liked him. I was like, I don't know, you need to be my coach. And I met him and guess what? I immediately upleveled the second that I met him and I met you and we started doing the things because you guys expected excellence. And I was like, oh my gosh, I guess this is what we're doing.
(27:30):
So I think first and foremost, finding that community of people, whether it's an online coaching program, whether it's a recovery group, whether it's your local gym, whatever it is, a place where people are doing what you desire to do, that would definitely be number one. A hundred percent. You are a product of your surroundings. So if you're not around people who are on the same path, it's not going to happen. My experience, it's not going to happen. Number two is maybe it's therapy, maybe it's not. But that self-honesty, definitely getting honest with yourself. So much of the struggle is denial. No, you know what, this is fine. We can normalize anything. The whole building can be going up in flames. There's a meme that I've seen a million times of a dog sitting in a house, the house is in flames, and he's like, this is fine. We can normalize pain and suffering or we can normalize happiness and joy and freedom. So I think it's the getting really honest about your behaviors and sharing that with someone, whether that is a therapist, a recovery group, a trusted friend, somebody who's not going to judge you and who's going to hold space for you. And I think you touched on that earlier, definitely, definitely not.
Michelle MacDonald (28:48):
And probably writing things down, right? Because we get caught in this loop where we fool ourselves, we trick ourselves. That's how the ego or the old version of yourself works or your self-sabotage behavior works. It convinces you that either just this one time is going to be okay when you know logically that you can't do that thing or it will convince you that what you are striving for is no longer at this moment of temptation. It's no longer what you really want. I don't really want that. Oh my gosh, I want to let loose a little bit. It's so restrictive. Come on over here, honey. Let's do this thing again,
Brittney Carbone (29:31):
Right? That is so spot on. That is so spot on because we'll ditch our goals for the temporary, whatever that relief is, whether it's laying on the couch instead of going to the gym, whether it's having a drink, whether it's eating the food, whatever it is, we will totally ditch our goals and lower the standard, which I know you talk about a lot as high as your standards. So you have to live into the standards regardless of feelings. And I think that that's the other thing I just wanted to say. We've gotten soft, which isn't very nice, but my experience is that I was always caved to how I felt and my feelings cannot dictate my actions because it's
Michelle MacDonald (30:19):
Got to be way around.
Brittney Carbone (30:20):
Yeah, be honest with you. At my core, if you were to look at me, I mean I'd like to just lay on the couch and eat bon bonds all day and watch tv. Not really, not now,
Michelle MacDonald (30:33):
Not game the 65
Brittney Carbone (30:34):
And not give this and not now, but be before at my core. I was not a people say, how did you become so motivated? I was not a motivated person. I would say the third thing is creating a life that's worth working towards and keeping. So what are the things? I have a lot to lose now. I didn't have much to lose before. And so it keeps me going to my recovery groups, even 16 years sober, almost 16 years sober. It keeps me tracking my macros and making sure JJ knows. It keeps me honest because I don't want to lose what it makes me so emotional. I don't want to lose what I've created for myself and what the universe and God has helped me with.
Michelle MacDonald (31:20):
How much has fitness played a part in this mental and spiritual health journey? Could you have done this without fitness, do you think? Or let's talk a little bit about that. Because fitness is just that underrated, under prescribed drug. And I know I'm preaching to the choir, like to people listening to this podcast, but fitness is such a huge lever that we need culturally to pull more immediately and more often.
Brittney Carbone (31:56):
I could not agree more. I distinctly remember being in college and going to the psychiatrist and them putting me on a medicine. I'm not saying that psychiatrics are not great because for some people I think it's a really great intervention. They didn't ask how often I was drinking. They didn't ask what I was eating or anything. They're like, here you go. I wasn't working out. I was drinking. I was eating all the things and I just wasn't taking care of myself. And I look back and I think, man, had we just started with some easy self-care habits, maybe sleeping for one, if I was sleeping, I possibly would've felt a little at that point. I think that fitness is, I mean, I owe my life to fitness. The amount it helps with my anxiety, depression, a, d, d, I mean if I wasn't training, I don't know where all this energy would go. It's like it's massively important. And I think it's really underrated.
Michelle MacDonald (33:03):
And I think your personal journey too, witnessing you do each year level up facing limiting beliefs facing internal chatter, negative self-criticism that prevented you from really glowing being a hundred percent who we know, those of us that know you. But that journey to the stage kind of shines a spotlight on any vestiges of that negative Nelly or any messages of some old behaviors that you really want to kick out of the house. Like you don't belong here anymore. In this new version of myself, it was just so great to see you step on that stage, which for many people will cause them to retract. And that's usually what you would typically do on the stage. But this year you stepped on that FMG stage and you rocked it. You did not edit yourself. You just got out there. You knew you had done the work, you had done a lot of work, years of work actually, and you showed up a hundred percent in love with yourself and in love with, when I say in love with herself guys, I mean she was so free.
(34:26):
And I'm sure you were still thinking of like, okay, turn here, turn down. But you seemed so free and so joyful. And when we talk about how you started that whole journey to sabotage, there was this, I was uncomfortable in my skin. I didn't love myself. You didn't even want to be in your body. You didn't want to be you to this current version of yourself as an inspiration to so many of us that showed up on that stage showing us that you can fall hard in your life and continue to fall as you scrabble your way out of the cave and have that moment of triumph where you're back in the game, you're back in that version of yourself that's free and loving and full of opportunity and full of possibility.
Brittney Carbone (35:18):
It was such a different experience. I remember I thought of what you always said. You're like, just and get on. And you said, enjoy it. And I will tell you, I felt completely fully self-expressed. That was the absolute first time I've ever felt excited to get on stage the first time. And it wasn't because I thought I would win, it was because I knew no stone had been unturned and I knew I had something happened this prep. I just said, screw it. Let's go all in. Let's just do this. Let's do the work. I practiced the posing all the things. I knew I had done the work, and I felt, again, my actions were self-loving. I gave myself the opportunity. So many times I would leave things to chance, well, let's see if we could come in. Let's see if peak week does the trick. And I knew about six weeks out, I said, I remember I messaged Jay and I was like, we're going to do this. This is different. It felt so different. Something shifted.
Michelle MacDonald (36:27):
And I'm curious, we're going to end with this note because I also witnessed you not only have the prep, the personal prep of a lifetime, and guys, when people get ready for the stage, we call it a prep or a contest prep preparation. But you had, I feel as a colleague of yours for both coaches, I feel that you had the coaching moment of a lifetime. You did incredible work, hard work, beautiful work with your client, and she was competing with you. And I kind of wonder how much of having her there as a witness to you and you having to be wasn't online. It was in person and you had to show up as she was getting ready for her. And she had a huge transformation and had battled with your own demons, I would imagine for a very long time. And she was getting so much, you were pouring so much into her. And that responsibility can really help a person to step into their power and say, I can't go back. I can't half-ass it now. This person's looking up to me. She's going through the hard with me. I got to show up and be myself.
Brittney Carbone (37:44):
Oh, Michelle, I thrive in service. When I'm in service. I do. Well, it's the most important aspect. Or I'll say that as a tool, be of service to other people. You can't think about yourself and being there with her and watching her, I mean the whole show day, every time I'd see her, I'm like, you have to go away from me. Cause I'm going to cry this makeup off. I mean, I'm going to cry right now. I'm so incredibly impressed. Oh yeah, it was the most beautiful thing to watch her get ready and her joy, she was so joyful on that stage. She was so happy and she's such an incredible human at her core and she's had her own things that I'm not going to share, that she's overcome. And so being with her, I mean, I feel like she's my sister. It's like we have so much in common. And so being there, it just felt like being with my best friend, my sister, and being able to show up for her every day, gave me so much purpose, so much purpose.
Michelle MacDonald (38:51):
And I think that could be another lever that a person could pull if they are struggling. You said something in your stoplight strategy to my community, and it was a reminder that be careful of ghosting, be careful of disappearing because sabotage thrives in isolation. Whereas the part of you that wants to grow and wants to live a purpose-driven life, that part of you will thrive in community. And so stay connected. And if you can fall in love with helping others as much as you need, help yourself, that beautiful synergistic exchange has a special power to it and lean into that power, don't underestimate it because it can really catapult you towards huge lasting change, helping other people and being of service, asking for help. There's a beautiful synergy there.
Brittney Carbone (39:54):
I 100% agree. And I used to hate asking for help until someone told me that you're doing a disservice to others if you don't ask for help, because it also gives them the opportunity to do what you just said, to show up and be of service to you and it is synergistic and you're helping each other. And that is how human nature is supposed to work.
Michelle MacDonald (40:17):
A hundred percent agreed. Sister, let's wrap it up here. We could talk forever about so many things and I'm for sure going to have to have you back on the show. I'd love To, Guys, you can follow Brittney on Instagram. What are you going by again these days? Just at Brittney Carbone, at Brittney Carbone, and a lot of great information on that gram and also really great energy, a lot of positivity. And so go check her out there. She also has her app as well. And I think we're going to see you on stage again in 2025, defending that crown in Mexico.
Brittney Carbone (41:02):
You are I guess we're going to say it now.
Michelle MacDonald (41:05):
Own it, sister. So here are the top three things I personally got from Brittney Carbone in this episode. One, the power of honesty and self-awareness. Guys, you have to get radically honest with yourself if you are going to be able to achieve great things. Brittney really emphasizes that true change begins with brutal self-honesty. You've got to identify triggers around food triggers around behaviors, and she offers us her signature stoplight strategy, categorizing foods and behaviors into these buckets of green, yellow, and red. And this has been a pivotal tool for herself and for her own clients. Two, the importance of community and support. James Clear talks about this in his book, atomic Habits Lean into the Power of Social Norm. Brittney highlights how surrounding yourself with supportive like-minded community really helps counter isolation or sabotage thrive. So whether it's recovery groups, coaching relationships, or being of service to others, that's a great one. Guys. Pull that lever connection fosters growth and resilience. And three, fitness and self-loving actions as a lifeline. Fitness is not just physical for Brittney, it's not just physical for myself, it's an integral part to mental and emotional transformation. Taking small, consistent, self-loving actions like tracking food, showing up for workouts and prioritizing recovery builds self-respect. And that is going to culminate in long-term change. Thanks guys. I hope you liked the show as much as I did. See you on the next episode.