Lonnie Marts Sneaks into Playlist Live!

you're into Cats. But the only thing that's better than getting invited to these exclusive events is successfully sneaking in. And people come up with some pretty clever schemes to smuggle themselves into these parties. Now that I would know as a straight cisgender white man with a mustache, I pretty much just walk into any place without anyone batting an eye, which is a problem. Now. My friend Lonnie March knows a thing or two about sneaking into an event.

Lonnie is a twenty seven year old actor, content creator, and former Storytime guest checkout season three, episode four, and he's best known for his God and Gabriel's sketches on TikTok and Lonnie's got a great story about the lengths he went to to sneak into the biggest social media convention in all of Orlando. I'm your host, will catch me if you can McFadden And this is hashtag storytime brought to you by iHeartRadio. Do you do you have

a story that you'd like to share with me? I do have a story about the time I snuck into Playlist. Oh yeah, um, were you at Playlist twenty twenty? I've been at so many playlists. Yeah, Playlist twenty twenty was the last trip that I went on before, right, Yeah, I remember we were we were flying there and like when we were flying back, especially like everyone was just wiping down their seats and purelling everything. We were like, I don't know how to do. What do we do? Uh?

Just we didn't have masks yet. It's a bug. There's a bug. They heard there's a bug. It was bad because like walking through that lobby plays I mean, I'm from Florida, so I like what happened was I had just gotten I had like just gone viral like in January and blown up to a couple million followers as it was so new, and I'm like, wow, I'm a real life content creator. Now I have to go to the playlist you know, I used It's my birth Right. Oh you went to British. I thought you were doing

Owen Wilson for a second, like one Wilson. I don't know if it's British, it's just yours. It's like the or just a kid on the playground who doesn't have all his teeth in yet. Um so I go to from Tom's. Yeah, I blew up on the internet. And then yeah, I had blown up on the Internet. And then I thought myself, I had to go to my own mosh. I play my birth Right, my trip Mecca.

Have to do my mecca, um, which is playlist But what happened was well, for those of you who are listening who aren't familiar with Playlist Live, Playlist Live is it's It's there's two major social media conventions that happen. There's Vidcan, which is on the West Coast. It happens in Anaheim, which just just happened. We we were just hanging out there. And then Playlist Live. They used to do them in a couple of different areas, but the

main playlist live is in Orlando, Florida. Yeah, and it is a massive social media convention where thousands and thousands of fans descend upon the Orlando Marriott Sin. They descend like a sin like locusts. Well, it's fans and people who wish they were invited. And then also and then also uh, disgruntled mothers who just sit at the ball. Oh my god. There cigarette that was. That was a

pivotal part. So so so I had just gone borrow from my series God and Gabriel super fun um, and I think I had just kind of started working with Collab and I was like, hey, Collab, now then I'm famous. Can you guys like get me into playlist? And you guys were like, yeah, no, it's super closed like that. You needed that like six months ago. And I'm like okay, um, they're like, can't do anything to help you. I'm like, that's understandable. I get a lot. You should have reached

out to me directly. I would have been like, I should have sate my guy. Yeah, I will get your wrist bands. I will sneak I'm all about sneaking people into stuff. So I would have good. Well then this is so this is what I did. So I was I was a little I was like, well, guys, I'm famous. I have to go to Playlist, like I'm now at that caliber. They just they would have gotten me, and they just didn't have the tickets. So I'm like, I'll just do it myself. I'll just get myself in so

I know I'll do it. Yeahself, I'll do it myself. So here's what I did. Um, because I was in Jacksonville, Florida, home of the Jacksonville Jaguars. Like that's a two hour drive. I'll drive down there, and my buddy he's like like, do you want to go to Playlist? He's like you have tickets. I'm like, no, do you want to go to Playlist? And he's like yeah. And so we get our both our chaotic good brains together, maybe just chaotic at this point, and we're like, how are we gonna

do this? And I'm like, we show up to the Playlist hotel, which, mind you, I don't know what I was thinking about as I walked in. It's literally just like like a two hundred kids, maybe three hundred kids in a lobby sprinting around like trying to tackle their favorite content creators, and the content cres like oh no, I'm being chased by my fans, and it's like, okay, that's what this is. And I think there might have been one stage in a conference room or like Charlie

Damilia was maybe talking. But I didn't see any educational panels at all when I was there, like an industry day where like, you know, all the boring panels happen. I guess so, and I don't know. So it was nighttime. I was walking by. I was seeing like Gabe Irwin, like, go to sleep, guy, you've been strolling up for quite a while. I saw Gabe, like Brent Riviera, and I'm just like, oh wow, they're just here. This is crazy. It's my first kind of real exposure and I'm like,

I absolutely need to be here. I need to be in this. I have to get into. I didn't even know it. I guess just a back state. I didn't have a pass, and I'm like, I don't have a pass. I don't know what I can't do because I don't know what people are doing here besides standing around the lobby. But I have to get in. So I look at my friend, I said, Hey, we're gonna sneak in to the back rooms, like the lounge areas, okay, and he had just gotten off of work. There's like a whole

underbelly of the Marriott where all the creators travel. And then yeah, there's like some like set aside green rooms for feature creators to kind of help keep them separate and have them like a safe space for them to gather where the fans aren't just clawing at them apparently. So I'm like, I'm gonna get into those spaces because I'm a good creator, and this is where this is where the journey begins. My friend, he had just gotten off of work and he was working at a bank,

and I'm like, this is perfect. This is absolutely perfect. You look like you could work here, and that is all I need. So he's like Oceans eleven, but it's just oceans too, just oceans because we're stupid, And I'm like, okay, this is we're gonna do. Man. You are gonna go over to where all those tired, anxious moms are who are drinking their wine, and you're gonna start picking up their wine glasses and you're gonna take one of those trays and you're gonna start collecting and say, hey, can

I get you anything else? Can I help you with that? Start cleaning off those tables? Okay, He's like, why am I doing them? Like, trust me, you can set up the foundation here, trust me, brother, And so he goes. He's like, all right, I'll trust you. And so fortunately he was in theater, yes, the ass the theater. So he does a great job, puts on a great performance, walks over there. It's like, man, he looks so tired.

I hope you're having a good time as your kid and a good so great starting like grabs a random tray. Like the people who actually work, they are like more help, I don't care whatever, you know, they're just annoyed. So he picks it up. He grabs all these glasses and stuff like that in his hands, and he's like, I'm Mike. He comes back to me. He's like, what do I

do now? I'm like, now, you see those two guards over there at that door, You're gonna walk right past them and go right into the lounge area and then we're in. We're in, baby, We're in the clear. And he's like that, he's exacts. It's not gonna work. I'm like, it's gonna work. Go up to it, and he's like, I'm not so sure. I'm like, okay, okay, okay, here here, here, tell them Zach from the Kitchen sent you. It's gonna work. Every time, anytime somebody is like, oh so and so

I don't know from somewhere. If they're from somewhere, it adds more validity. I'm like, that's that's a name I don't know in a play I'm unfamiliar with. So I'm he's like, Okay, I'm gonna give it a try. And so he's going up to go do it and thank god at the same time because I'm like, it might

not work. He might just get kicked out. This horde of girls comes chasing after Brita Riveria or something like that, like, and so they like crowd up the security area as he's about to go through, and so he's like able to sneak by, and I'm like, okay, perbe he didn't have to use the thing. But one of the security guards like, seas hey, stop, stop, stop, where are you going?

Where are you going? And I'm like, oh, almost no. He I was standing back at this, but He caught my friend right as he tried to sneak by at the same time as the girls in the crowd on all the commotion. He's like, where are you going? And he's like, oh, Ken from the kitchen sent me. And I'm like, that's not even what I said to say. I said up and the guy's like, yeah, okay, go just go, just go, and I'm like it have walked,

it walked And he's back there. He like he starts walk around and I'm like, yes, yes, wait, I'm not back there. Does this help you? I'm not back there? What? And so I call I said, hey, I didn't think this all the way through. Come back out, come back out, And so he comes back out and I'm like, okay, plan too. This is how I'm going to get back there. Now this works. We know that security guards can be

like tricked deceived. This is totally gonna work. Also then, just for context to the security guards at Playlist are like mad with power. They're all like they have no information as to like no information, they never pass goes where or what wristband means what, And they're all just like I am blocking the store and nobody gets by it. So They're like they're a stone wall. It's it is.

They don't know what they're doing. They've just been told something by Larry up in the tower, and I don't know who that is, but it sounds like somebody who'd be telling them things. And this is where we got This is how we got kicked out. So I have to realize that we both needed to get through. I'm like, new plan, time time to take over the world. And there's I see everybody walking by with their badges, right, it's when the plan hatches. I'm like, oh, I'll just

make my own. And so I'm like, okay, so this is where it was stupid. I'm like, yeah, but this is what this is the mistake I made. So as everybody was walking by, I'm like, I gotta be slying. Get a picture of somebody somebody's bad so I can like recreate it. I have some photoshop skills. I got a photo, I got like Photoshop whatever photoshop version. Like in two thousand and six, whenever YouTube was just coming out,

and I was like, yeah, internet making photos. You know, I didn't make the banners and thumbnails for people on forums and stupid stuff like that. So I have skill is what I'm saying, Yeah, you do. Some lady was walking by and I saw her all access badge, like that's the one snapped a picture and then I'm like perfect. So we go back to his house that night. I'm staying up in bed until three am, looking cross orfencing the picture, putting everything together in photoshop, like adding little lines,

adding my name. I'm like, oh, and I'll even do like Marx Media LLC. So I look official. And then fortunately he was. He was how do I say the badges were done right? But we needed to print them somewhere and laminate them, yeah, because they're all laminated or whatever, and fortunately he was. Um. He was flirting with the with the leasing office, the head of the leasing office, as as his apartment complex. Next morning, it was like

the last day of playlist. We go over there and I'm like, can you get us a can you like get her to let us laminate this stuff. He's like, I'll put on my charm. I'll do what I have to do for a playlist. So we go in there, he's like flirting with them. I'm like in the back, like trying to laminate everything. And then she's like, you can use the laminator. It's fine. It's like we don't. It's you can. You don't have to sneak around. I'm like, okay,

do you have any lanyards? And she gives us like a Disney World lanyard and then like a Kinko's lanyard, and I don't even know what the Playlist's actual lanyards where. I'm like, it's gonna have to work. We cut it out and the badges look good. It looks like a replica. And I'm like, look a picture. I have the picture of Oh do I have the picture of it? I have the picture of the bag. Would never I would keep that forever. I don't. I think it fell apart. So so we get done up. We're like sitting in

the car on the way there. We're like, oh, we're a playlist. We're official. I'm an official creator. Now Here we go and this is how we got this is where I went bad. So we get to the parking lot and the first guard we're like, I'm like, I haven't. I'm trying to like to be subtle about it, but I'm also trying to make sure they see that I have a badge, you know. So like the first guy in the parking lot, I like, in like this the

Creator only area he's guarding. We walk up and we're like flashing our badges and it's like nighttime and it's kind of dark. He like looks and gave us off. I'm like, oh, buddy, buddy, we're in this now. This is what this is how you defeat capitalism. This is how you defeat capitalism. You steal from the rich and

you make your own products, you know. And so we can up to the stairs going up into the massive like the hotel or whatever from the Creator side mind you, and then we're about to walk by another Curity guy. He says, hey, boys, come come on, come on, come over here, come over here real quick. And I'm like, what's the problem. Officer like, what's going on? What's what's happening? A special Creator Only update, and he like grabs both

of our badges. He grabs both of our badges as hey, i's gotta put hands on these because some people have been making fake badges, so they're requiring us to touch all of these before we let anybody in. You guys have a good time, go have fun. What I'm like, of course, sir, of course, my buddy is crapped himself. At his point, he's like the single bead of sweat running down and I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like,

there's no way he knew. These are mint. They're perfect, like exact copies are laminated, we have lanyards, they're fine. There's no way he knew. He's just doing his job. These are perfect. And so we get inside and I realized this is where we left up and probably why he called us out and was being so kind to not kick us out. The picture I took was of a woman who was like four feet tall, so on her the badge looked very big. So I made my badge about the size of a sheet of paper. Everybody

else's playlist badge was the size of a credit card. Yeah, yeah, yeah, there's they're definitely the perspective was off. The perspective was off. It's like I was in motion when I took that picture, and that's where I messed up. And to make it even worse, because it's a photo not a video, I didn't know that it was double that it was double sided. Oh yeah, definitely knew. Could you flip that badge over real quick? I supposed to what the back looks like.

I'm like, this is what I'm panicking, Like, we come so far, it's the last day. We did all that work. You had to flirt and snoo snow with the leasing office lady to get these laminated. We have to do this. We have to see if it'll let us in the back. And so he's like, I don't know, man, this looks really stupid. Like we're saying he were like a poster on our chest and everybody else has like the sides

of the credit card, Like we're dumb. We're we're like super featured creators, like exactly meat creators and or they're like we're like we're cause playing. We're gonna this is our cost, but we're creators, cosplaying creators, that's all this is. And so I'm like, we're just gonna, We're just gonna try, And by we, I mean him again, because I realize that I am too scared to get in trouble because like Josh, if I get kicked out, I can't come back. So you have to do it for us. And he's like,

what am I supposed to do? I'm like, just kind of cover it with your arms, and it would be fine, just kind of like say as you know and show it a little bit, but then keep like your arms like you're just just you're annoyed, you're just grawntiled the full access bad. You're fine. Yeah, you've got somewhere to be, you know what I mean, Like I don't handle I don't have to time to show you my past. You know, I've got a panel to be on. Like I said,

this is where we messed up. But if anybody's listening, if you're on the phone, people are way less likely to stop you, and especially if you're an intense conversation. This is like real espionage hacks here, I'm giving out for free. Yeah. But I'm like, Josh, I'm just standing in the lobby with my like posterboard posterboard padge And he is like, I'm like, hey, buddy, just go see see if you just flash it and get by and then call me and if it works, I'm gonna come

right behind you. It's gonna work. It's fine, you know, as long as no other secuity guards like grabbing him clipping over our badges were fine. So we go back to the same VIP area that security guard is there or whatever. Now Josh has like normal like creator clothes on. He doesn't look like he's like working at a bank. So he like is able to just like flash the badge and go right in. And I'm like, it's still worked. It's still worked. This is perfect. We're smart. You got this.

It's the confidence that will work every time. It's the confidence, and that's what I learned here. So I'm like, I'm about to go back there. I call and said her, are you in? Are you okay? What's up? He's like, were There's some areas that you need wristbands get into, but I'm in the general areas. I can just kind

of go in and stuff like that. So coming in like five minutes, he's like, I'm renegading right now with Addison Ray Like we're exactly just doing the Renegade with Addison and Charlie, And so I'm about to go back then, I'm like, we've done it. I'm an official creator. And then he calls me back and says, they kicked me out, And I said, how what do you mean that? Who would kick you out? You had the badge? You're good.

He's like, some schmuck came up to me. Some random guy was like, oh, hey, buddy, where'd you get that badge? And he's like, oh, don't worry about don't worry about that. It's mine. I got it. I got it from me. And the guy's like no, no, no no, let me see it and like grabs the badge and flips it over and starts yelling this guy's got a fake badge. He's got a fake badge. And I'm like, who, who are you? Why are you living in life? And joy like in the security guard he's like he's like in Josh like.

The security guard was like, nah, dude, I knew it was fake. I wasn't about to kick you out, but once that guy said something, I had to. And I'm like, I worked so hard on the I sit up to like three amm like working on these they were perfect except where they weren't. And so he got kicked out. At that point, I'm like, well, I can't risk my career. I'm just gonna go ahead and meet him outside. So then we left outside. But I bowed that the next time I went to one of these conferences I would

be invited. Unfortunately, at big Con last week, I was invited as as a guest and a speaker on one of the panels for Meta and I did not have to make a fake badge. And that's good because those would have been very difficult to replicate because they were like hardboard, double sided and like laminated on one side and like rough on the other. I'm like, oh, they're getting good, So I gotta father technique. You can have start a whole business of fake fake badges, fake pass dude.

The The ultimate would have been if you got in with the fake badge and then just walked on stage for a panel like that, you had no idea. Imagine. Stop giving me ideas because next year a big con I might, but imagine with the confidence, Oh my god. Yeah, it's like, oh and we uh here we are the Beauty on Budget panel. Yeah, Lonnie, I ivy um going. When are we opening up the flour for questions? And thank you Karen? Yeah you're moderating now. Yeah, It's like,

I'm gonna tackle this one first. So when it comes to beauty, it's all about the external factors. Um, the inside does not matter. As long as you look good on the outside. That's where true validation comes from. Good question Mike dropped, does anybody else want to touch on that best? Just such an honest panel. Really, we are in Los Angeles, California, and I'm gonna be honest with you. If you are not pretty, you will not have privileges. So okay, so next question. I feel good about that. Yeah,

good question, good question. So wait, are you going to Playlist Live this year? Absolutely? And if they don't invite me back, I'm repeating the process. I am absolutely making another badge. It's something about the challenge and the thrill. I hope one day the CIA hires me from my skills h and they're like, you know, Lonnie, we saw what you did at least we think you got. We think you got Gusto kid. We like what you did at Playlists, how you made those badges and were too

scared to use them. Your mediocre photoshop skills aside the way that you the way that you use your friend as a shield and test and test guinea pig, we think we got a butt for you on the force. How about you come do some training at Quantico. You know, your sticktuitiveness really showed through and whatever. You bailed out twice because your plan looked like it might not work. Perfect Operation playlist. Can you also make passes for my

fourteen year old daughter. My daughter's been trying to get in there for a while. She really wants to meet Charlie and Dickson. If you could please help us out. We got you a spot on the force. Well, mister President, I think I can do that. I would be like, that's a hard pass for me. It was I don't know, I don't know something about like whenever I was in like middle school, I always loved like breaking onto the roofs of buildings. So I just like different bandage point.

I don't know, it's like, oh, STI like, I would never lock pick because I can't. I'm not I'm skilled. I don't know how to do that. I would just hope the door was open. I've thought about that often of like I need to just learn how to lock pick, because so often I get to a lock door and

I'm like, ah, shocks. But if I would have the guy with the kid, and it's like, can't be that hard, I mean, I think, because I mean, like there's so many rooftops I haven't been able to access because of a simple lock, and security is merely an illusion and all can be all can be overcome and like navigated through with the proper like sticktuitiveness, determination or proper set of skills. And um, I like to think that is

what's made me the creator I am today. And do you see those channels too, the like lock picking channels, Like so I gets I get in a black hole of those, Like I had a friend who actually snuck into them. I think it was the um the logan paul KSI fight by making a fake badge and I'm like, that's that's a lot one of my friends got. He got Actually, I think this is the same dude. He got a warrant out for his arrest and didn't get

arrested till a year later. I mean, because that's Vegas, Like you're sneaking in because that one was that one in Vegas or was it in London? I think it was Vegas. But it's like, I don't recommend doing these things. That's my disclaimer. Um, because he got a warrant and didn't think anything of it, but then got arrested in a separate state like a year later. Yes, And I'm like, UFC, don't play. But I'm like, okay, noted because he posted

about it. He posted and went viral, so they're like, okay, cool, we'll find you. That's where he fucked up. I guess I keep it to yourself, Like that's what I'm saying, like, just if if you get kicked out, it's like, my name is my name is Morgan. Morgan's for the people and you I'm never coming Sorry. You know, I made an honest mistake. I was looking for my wife, I said, I, like I always said, don't tell anyone about you know this as we're doing a podcast where you're telling everyone's

name is to remain unnamed. No, no, but I'm saying your experience, like, oh but you got caught, you got kicked out, you didn't get arrested, everything was fine. Yeah, and I we're coming back. We're going back to playlists exactly what I'm gonna invited this time. And I won't have to make a fake badger. Maybe I'll make a fake badge just to see if I can do it, you know, just to test my abilities. Yeah, yeah, but I I don't know something about just like sneaking into

places just to see if you can. Like that social engineering bit is a fun piece too, but definitely there are risks involved, and you can go to prison. Good. Yeah, it's a moral of the story. That's the moral of the story. Follow your dreams and know that you can't go to prison. Yeah, and walk walk swiftly with let's review.

Let's review the key takeaways. Confidence is key. Yes. Whenever Josh had his outfit on and started picking up the drinks from the moms and just kind of walked by and said, Kenny from the kitchen sent me the security guard is like the confidence was matched. Also, dress the part. Dress the part. Give them less reasons to question you and less reasons to notice you. All right, Um, rely on the skills you do have. I am a charmer, so if I really need to too, I could have

charmed the pants off those security gardens. Has been anywhere, but I just chose not to. Um. Josh had experienced in the theater, so he acted confidence. Um. And the last tip is phone. Yeah, fake the phone call. Fake the phone call, you know, and just keep on walking. Fake the phone call, keep walking. Do all these things and you can get in anywhere. I think. Also, if you have a ladder, that'll do it to ladders are letters are a key. Nobody wants to stop to you.

In fact, they want to help you. They want to get the four for you, and basic photoshopping skills too. That is a requirement. And if you're a hacker. I actually called up one of my buddies who's a hacker. I'm like, can you get me? Like, can you hack the list? He's like, what do you mean hack the list? He's I'm like, can you like get into the database or something. He's like, it's probably just a Google Drive sheet. I'm like, hack it, damn it. I don't get into

the main frame, darts, hack it. Just get me through the firewall. He's like, I don't want to know how you hack it. I don't care how you do it. Just do it. You just should go full Jack bower Tony exactly like you. So yeah, those are the morals of my story. It was a good time. Ten out of ten would do it again. I love it. We've been doing another little little mini segment that I'd love to run by you and see if you want to participate.

But it's it's a little storytelling game. It's called first, Last, Best, Worst, and so we pick a category and then you briefly tell us what your first experience, was your last experience? Was your best experience and your worst experience? What was the first vacation you remember going on? Oh my god, the first vacation I remember going on, Um was on the Disney cruise. Actually it was yeah, and oh I don't know. Yeah, yeah, well it was like six months ago,

so six maybe it was awesome. I couldn't even get into the kiddie pool. What's up with that? He made a fake lamb in it to get in the kiddie pool. Yeah, I am a I am a child. I am a baby walking with confidence on them on my baby. Sorry, I'm trying to get into the kiddie pool. I'm your security guard won't let me. I'm a child. Look at my badge. Um, like, sir, did you steal that wristband from a child? I said, I'm a child. What do you mean four year old going on a Disney cruise? Dude? Okay,

So these are the things I remember. Um. They say you don't remember things after the age of three, and I was four or five and barely remember things. But I remember they had ice cream all you can eat ice cream by the pool side with sprinkles and that just that was like that was like, oh wow, so this is what living is. Yeah, that's that's core memory right there. This is why, this is what life's all about.

Like some people grew up with trauma, I was fortunate to grow up thinking about's the next time I'm gonna get to go to the the pool side at the Disney

Cruising get some like sprinkles with ice cream and sprinkles. Um. There was a giant There was a giant slide, which honestly, the slide is probably maybe one story high, but obviously it was a massive slide in a massive pool to a four year old, and it had Mickey Mouse's face at the bottom of it, and I thought it was a giant pool, okay, And it was probably just like an inflatable tub on the deck, who knows, but it

was a beautiful um. We went off, We went to one of the beaches, I guess or whatever, and I just think remember floating away. It's like, as a kid, everything is way more dramatic than it really was. But I think I remember floating away from the shoreline in an inner tube and like sharks swimming underneath me, when in reality it is probably like some minnows And I was like a foot away from the from the beach or whatever. But it was a lot of I think

we saw Tarzan. Maybe Tarzan had just come out or something like that. They showed him on the Disney movie Super Cool the movie, yeah, or like I like he swung in onto the cruise the movie just the movie. If he was there, I don't remember seeing him, but I remember seeing the Tarzan movie and Phil Collins going hard in that sounds like there was so much cool stuff. And I actually haven't been back since, which makes me very sad, but that was probably the I think that

was a first vacation I went on. All right, that's a that's a solid first vaca. Very hard to compare. Everything whenever you're a child in ignorance is bliss and you don't realize that the Kidi Pool year and it's probably filled with urine, just unlimited for you with sprinkles. Yeah, so because that's all I needed. That's honestly, as a kid, Why didn't that kill us? Like that? Kids are resilient? Man, Like like that shi all the ice cream, I ate

should kill a child, but it didn't. I was just like, yeah, rally bag puke and rally let's go baby day two at the pool, Like, can I put some chocolate sprinkles on it? This time my last vacation. Ah, what conscert is a vacation? I went to, I went to I went to I went to New York for like twenty four hours. I saw that. I saw a video that

you posted that one. Um. The gross thing. The thing I didn't realize about New York is that every Airbnb in New York, if you're in like Manhattan, that area, like our airbnb was it slept eight people and had one bathroom. Oh my god. Yeah, I mean it's space is a commodity in New York. So I get that. I get that, But why is toilet's a commodity too? A commodity a commode? Come mode? Um? We went to go.

It was the premiere of The Boys season three, which is the first time UM and season three episode one it hits hard I did. I was just like, oh, this is this is what it is happening. Yeah, he is a kind of blown up. It is Genitalia is on the stream. Um, but I love news. I realized, I like really like New York because you could walk out of your building and find like whatever you need,

so you can just like drop like walk out. It's like boom over here is like a lady who's like naked on crack and like gonna sell you some Tarot cards. Get it over there. It's like a library. Um, and it's super fun. Like it's like, oh, the Dichotomy of Man and that's super fun. Like the rats are cute. I kind of like the rats. Yeah, it's like, oh, that's a big Like, Oh, he's brought me a slice of pizza and the black plague. How sweet of him. Um. I got lost on the subway system. Oh yeah, got

on the way to the airport. Everything Like. I like that you can just use your Apple pay to get on the subway though, that's kind of cradd that it caused like two dollars or something something like. That's fine. You can be out in the city kind of at any time and night. It feels like and you're probably not going to get stabbed depending on where you go. Um. But that was the last one I took, um so quick twenty four hour New York trip. Okay, what was

the what was the best vacation? That's vacation was my senior trip our class president convinced us that we should go on our senior cruise. And so again, cruises are a common thing with me, Royal Caribbean, what's up? Or Disney Cruise. But it was like I went to a school. First of all, we had one hundred kids in our high school fourteen and my graduating class small private Christian school woohoo and fourteen. So we're all like, yeah, we're

gonna be hanging out. You know, it's just us. If someone's missing, bull no, and if two people are missing, you guys are definitely hooking up. Um, like we know where you are, Like it's not that hard to guess what's happening wherever. But that was fantastic. Yeah, after the long football season, I did football. Football season's done, went to the playoffs. It's like, you know what school, high school has done? My year of like mandatory schooling are

done with my skip, I'm no longer a truant. And so it's like the perfect way to celebrate that is a cruise. So we went to Cosmo. When scuba diving out there, rising scuba diving is kind of hard, you have to hold your breath. Not for me, why not? What's up? I generally, it's kind of don't like the ocean as a whoa, stop, don't say that thing. You know, it's it's a lot, it's it is a lot of planet. It's like, and I'm just not a great swimmer. I'm a land mammal. Okay, I'm great on land. It's just

you get me in the water. I'm like, what are some of your best land skills? Box jumps? Jumps? You can't do box jumps in the water. Cannot That's that's the thing. Uh uh. Rowing but just rowing on land, like using the rowing machine. I'm a good rope but I don't like to do it on the ocean, on the water, on the wet I just don't like not knowing what's beneath me. And it's are you scared of whales? Uh No, not really. I did go not Scooba snorkeling in Belize and there were whale sharks and I swim

with whale sharks and that's so cool. It was really cool. But just in general, I just don't like being I feel like it's I'm just out of my element, you know what I mean. It feels like it feels like outer space, you know. Yeah, But worse, nothing swimming above you or beside you or underneath you in outer space exactly, and they can't just change direction and eat you. I can also kind of pinpoint where it went wrong. I was.

I was surfing in Costa Rica when I was like eighteen years old, and we were right where the leatherback turtles mate. And leatherback turtles are six foot sea turtles. They're freaking dinosaurs. They're massive, and one I was like enjoying sunset and like, oh, what a beautiful view, and then one came up right next to my board with its mouth a gape. And you've ever looked inside the mouth of a leatherback turtle, it is a nightmare's nightmare.

Fuel They eat jellyfish, so it's all spiny and crazy. And that thing came up right next to my leg and I was like, I fucking paddled faster than I've piddle in my life. That's when you were done. And then I was like, yeah, fuck the ocean. I was like that place. Actually, honestly, I would agree if that happened to me, I'd probably like, yeah, we're good, We're good. I was probably trying to eat you. It's another core memory. I think he was just saying hi. He was just

like He's like, yeah, but I was. Then You're like it looked like a dinosaur. It was especially out of nowhere too, like you're just peacefully enjoying it, and yeah, there's such a serene, beautiful moment, just like he's like, I would like to enjoy as well. Hey that's not so fun fair enough. Yeah, so the cruise was fun Cosmo scuba diving. Um. One of my friends confessed her love for me and I rejected it, and then we were still stuck on a boat with each two days.

I'm like, why would you not do this on the last day? Like, why would you do this midway through? She was like maybe there wasn't because if you were into it, you would have been like why didn't you do this on the first day? Absolutely, so yeah, maybe

she shot for the middle. You know, I guess staphysically speaking, she picked a good it was a good option, yeah, But statisically speaking, I feel like there could have been other options, like maybe should have gathered more stats first, Yeah, absolutely, a little reconnaissance. More overall, the there's fourteen of you in class, Like, you guys haven't figured out over the year. You could do the recon. You could ask anybody literally, wait, do you think I don't think so. You're like, I'm

in the middle of some fro yo and sprinkles. I got my sprinkles and frolio. I'm really living my chaha memory. Will you talk about loves before right now? You know? Not the time? Yeah? No, not the tom I'm in between the mamma yo sprinkles. Um weird weird weird flex. I won the U the karaoke competition on a Princess cruise. Congratulations. I was the Princess Karaoke King. Yep, Princess Karaoke King, and I sang h lean on me and all the old folks were just like for the rest of the trip,

We're just like King Karaoke. Voted for you. I voted for you. I knew you had something special. Mcfannin thanks Herb, Yeah, you could call me her. But we were the only my girlfriend and I were the only two young people on the cruise, and everyone was just like, look at you too, Oh, come on, I love you. Guys are outliving your life because no, because no, me and me and Harb, we didn't go out on the cruiseeas until

we were in our sixties, and I loved it. You guys are doing it now, Yeah, we were, I love we had We had different outfits for every night. We pretended like it was a different decade. So we had like, oh, it's not twenties thing and there and they're the old people are just like I remember twenties. Yeah, my friend Margaret died in the twenties. She was such a sweet soul. Thank you for making thank you for reliving that horrible memory. Thank you for bringing this back to my psyche. Okay,

so that was the best. That was the best one, and then we've got the last one, which is what is the worst worst vacation? The worst vacation I ever went on was probably with my mom, Um, shout out mom, Yeah, God, the worst vacation. Ah. It's tough because like part of the best I think it mine is maybe mixed with like it was a really good one, and it's when I moved across YEP, when I moved across the country last year, I'm like, I'm like, I'm graduated college now something.

I'm like, I'm trying to do this whole coming of age thing I saw in the Disney Channel growing up. So I'm like, I have to do my cross country road trip to find myself and to find my place as such a Disney themed episode, because we're talking about we're talking Playlist Live in Orlando, We're talking about the Disney Cruise as a child, and then now all I know is Disney. I don't know how other people navigate the world that they haven't seen it in a Disney

movie like this. This is my point of reference. So I'm like, like, this is gonna be my big coming of age cross country trip. Um. And I decide I'm going to visit like fifteen friends over thirty days while I moved from Florida Jacksonville, Florida, like I ten east basically over to Los Angeles, which West. Yeah, and my friends like, you're an idiot. I'm like, why are you saying I'm an idiot? For friendship? That's not a bad idea. This is a life changing and it wasn't a straight shot.

I decided that I would drive up to Boston, Okay, back down to the Carolinas that was a mist like, and then go across and I spent the first week driving up and down the coast so like this just from Jacksonville to South Carolina is like a ten hour drive, yea myself, And after the first two hours, I'm like, oh no, if you haven't been able to tell I'm a talkative person, I'm a social being. Every one of my trips have been very social. And now I'm like,

what did I do? I'm stupid, this is dumb. And I spent the first week and every stop I had was overnight. It wasn't like I spent a week there. I'm like, I got thirty days to make it over there. So I visited fifteen people, seven of them on this coast. So I'm like, I'm doing night by night driving six hours to a different place. As soon as I wake up to spend like four hours awake with the person, I'm like, I have to go to sleep because I have to leave at six am because I have to

drive seven hours up to New York tomorrow. Like that was awful. It was so stupid. I should have done a straight shot or giving myself more than thirty days. The lesson I learned were spending at least spend at least like two nights at a place, don't or just snight or just have the like itinerary open ended, you know where you're like, so you can shift it. I feel like I am, but people had worked, so I'm like,

I gotta get there because they have work tomorrow. Otherwise they can't hang out with me for two hours when I get to their house at twelve pm that or twelve m at night. You know, it was so dumb. Like the highlight was that I got to take my mom to Niagara Falls. We wound up getting up there somehow and then driving back down, which was great all the way up to Niagara Falls. Niagara Falls is so lame too. Okay, the falls are beautiful, but everything around

it is shut down from the pandemic. Like there's no tourists anything. Like the Canadian side had like a ferris wheel going. They were shooting off fireworks and on the American side they're like, we have the disease, and the disease is stricken us. We are not allowed to be commercing or whatever. So it's just the boat. But it was cool to be. I would fly it. Don't drive to Niagara Falls. There's no But the one thing is now that you've moved out to LA, you're never gonna

do that coast road trip again. So you're getting like, yeah, like, at least you got that, you know, it would have made it better if I is, if I had someone with me the whole time. And funny enough, the Snickle another content creator. I picked him up halfway through in Minnesota to finish out the drive through like Utah, Vegas, La, and I'm like, this is gonna be great. We're gonna talk the whole time, hang out this this is the coming of age road trip movie. I need to know

what happened. He had a girlfriend at the time who was in Scotland. She's on a different time zone, so he the whole time I'm driving, he is either on the phone with his girlfriend in a one side of conversation I cannot hear, or he's watching TikTok's loudly and I'm like, I can't play music because he's on the phone. And then when I'm trying to play music, he's like watching TikTok's and laughing and I can only hear it, and I'm like, I wish I could watch that too. See, yeah,

that'd be crazy if I could see something. Let me just turn off the music, you know, and then you're just also hearing like no, I love you more. No, And I'm like, I think I'd rather die at Nebraska. No, you hang up first up. I just once we got to the corn Palace in Nebraska, I'm like, I think the corn Palace. I thought the Corn Palace was in South Dakota. Is it South Dakota. I think they're all the same. They're all the same. I hate that, you know where it is with respect on the corn palaces.

Go to the corn pads. You get the chance that was. It was so dumb. It was so dumb, and it was the only thing for like twenty miles. And I'm like, we have to go to the corn Palace. It really is a palace made of corn. It is all made of corn. It was like it look like a school gym but also a corn corn palace. And I just I'm like, who are you people? Why is this what you do out here? And it was got time on

their hands. The moral of the story is like, like, if you're gonna do that cross country road trip, do it. Give yourself more time. Don't spend one night in a place, give yourself like three nights and leave it kind of open. Ended and make it what adventures may come. You know. Yeah, it was. I would do it again, but I would do it a lot slower, and I'd make sure someone was with me at every part of the drive, because

driving nine hours through the night is not the move. Yeah, to it in an electric vehicle to at this point, because gas prices are a little it's like eight dollars in here another. Yeah, so like the road trip is dead at the moment. Yeah, unless even if the tesla. It's like, don't go through the desert in a tesla. Yeah,

it's a little dangerous. Well, I mean unless you go in a place that's rural and then you can get gas for only four dollars, which is very high in the rest of the country, but a great deal if you're from La. I think that sums it up. I think I think we've learned a lot. There's been a lot of messages. I think what we learned is we need to go on a cruise together. We need to sneak. We need to sneak onto a cruise. What happens if they catch us, I don't know. I think they just

drop you off in international waters. Oh you think, so, what kind of boat where they put us on men like wood or just no. I think they just hurl you off the side. They can't do that legally. What if they like airlift us out, like you can't be here for your helicopter, Right, that's what it sounds like to me. The nearest island and then probably yelled at by the local authorities and adventures when I'm hearing I don't like the sound of this. I'd like to go

to Jamaica. Let's do it on, okay, Jamaican cruise. We're sneaking on. I mean, guys, if I do it though, the CIA will definitely want me then yeah, right, yeah, we just gotta we gotta like figure out the outfits. I'm sure we could sneak on is some sort of a like or we could be like or we could be like we're we're the crew's performers. We're the Yeah, we're we're the entertainment. We have a we have a two man show, like I'm a ventriloquist and he's Jess.

I'm the dummy. I'm a dummy stripper. That's the other part two is we have to improvise the whole thing. We can't have any dummy Stripper and like, wow, how does that work? I'm like, Hilarius, the show goes, I'm the show and you can see it. Well, that about does it for this episode of Hashtag story Time, thanks again to Lonnie Marts. Make sure to check out all his links in the description, take a second right now and hit subscribe so you don't miss next week's episode.

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