Episode 17 Cardinals and Comfy Chairs PLANET - 512908- ➿ Cardinal Fang requests an unexpected planet with a comfy chair Consultant Recommendation; Error, file overwritten and locked. Original Consultant Recommendation; Featureless ball. Reclining Chair. Multiple cupholders. Content Warning for: Comedic violence Emotional abuse Alcoholism Cardinal Fang! Special thanks to Gilligan Mungus for this episode's Planet Brief Submission and this week's Patrons: Sierra Tyrrel, Maltriestrei, Erin Kanani, J...
May 24, 2019•24 min•Season 1Ep. 17
Episode 16 Puppets and Partnerships PLANET - Team Building Exercise Citizen Line Manager H. Piltz (ID 63277482) conducts a team building exercise day with Citizen Employee T. Geistman (ID 362884) and Bio Facsimile David 7 (ID 95847335). Exercise Results: Error 404 Teamwork not found Content Warning for: Sudden yelling Comedic violence Alcoholism This week's Patrons: Eric Zagar, El Addams, John C. Worsley, Lauren, Katie Nolan, Jonathan Clark, Danielle Goldstein, Patrick Perry, Hilary Merline, Ant...
May 17, 2019•19 min•Season 1Ep. 16
Episode 15 Moisturiser and Measures PLANET - REVIEW Citizen Line Manager H. Piltz (ID 63277482) reviews the performance of Citizen Employee T. Geistman (ID 362884) and Bio Facsimile David 7 (ID 95847335). Line manager recommendation; Restrict Consultants access to moisturiser. Reciprocity via Vent Torment. Alternative foot application. Returned damaged Graph Friend. Bathin is dreamy. Deploy the “Party Ender”. Megatron-Polar Alliance noted. Teamwork Needed. PLANET - REVIEW Content Warning f...
May 10, 2019•21 min•Season 1Ep. 15
Episode 14 Seals and Accountants PLANET - 512907- 𐆖 Lorek Brynison, King of the Armoured Polar Bears of Svalbard, requests a planet of snow and ice where they can be safe from the consistent planetary ruination of humanity. Consultant Recommendation: Frost ball. Business rivers. Abundant coastal relaxation points. Seal catering. Heated accountants. Content Warning for: Comedic violence Emotional abuse Alcoholism Special thanks to Bryn for this episode's Planet Brief Submission and this week's P...
May 03, 2019•24 min•Season 1Ep. 14
Episode 13 Raves and Catering PLANET - 512906- ⭂ Psilax Bromius requests a party planet with a strobe moon for the purpose of raving. Consultants are invited to the planet warming along with any cult followings. Consultant recommendation; Dancefloor planet surface. Dual purpose dance moon with chillout core. Nibbles provided via hatchway. Robot catering staff. Party end initiated by mooncrash. Content Warning for: Comedic violence Emotional abuse Alcoholism Child abuse Illegal drugs Mild p...
Apr 26, 2019•26 min•Season 1Ep. 13
Episode 12 Denizens and Goobrication PLANET - 512905- ⬳ Bathin, Great Duke of Galactonium, requires a plant in which to store precious stones and requires that the denizens therein can only be moved by transporter. Consultant recommendation; Nesting safes. Denizens residing in mechanisms. Goobrication (Patent Pending). Dogs in chutes. Bathin is an idiot. Content Warning for: Comedic violence Violence to animals Emotional abuse Alcoholism Special thanks to Paul Gregory for this episod...
Apr 19, 2019•22 min•Season 1Ep. 12
PLANET - 512904- ⟴ Serafina Mouchet requests a planet to demonstrate their wealth and aesthetic sense and requires that it also conceals their location so that no-one can locate them. The use of a mangrove-lined river labyrinth is mandated. Consultant recommendation; Mangrove labyrinth with help from a Graph Friend™. Decadent gondoliers. Gold where possible. If in doubt, computers. Vents = safety. Content Warning for: Comedic violence Emotional abuse Alcoholism Minor gaslighting Special thanks t...
Apr 12, 2019•22 min•Season 1Ep. 11
Episode 10 Tokens and Orphans PLANET - REVIEW Citizen Line Manager H. Piltz (ID 63277482) reviews the performance of Citizen Employee T. Geistman (ID 362884) and Bio Facsimile David 7 (ID 95847335). Line manager recommendation: Better containment. Reciprocal violence. Amends required to marmalade orphans. Accidental achievement does not count as achievement . Content Warning for: · Comedic violence · Emotional abuse · &nb...
Apr 05, 2019•26 min•Season 1Ep. 10
PLANET - 512903-Ợ Berthenoldimothy von Wittlesteinium VII, club historian of the Intergalactic It’s-probably-not-a-good-idea-to-touch-that Club requests a lava planet that you can swim in and contains a lava slide spanning the entire planet. Consultant recommendation: Buyer beware. Legal disclaimers. Ultra Lavatron Slide. Orbiting safe zone. LavLev protection. Thermal chaps. Marmalade creche. Content Warning for: Comedic violence Violence to Animals Emotional Abuse Alcoholism Special thanks to M...
Mar 29, 2019•26 min•Season 1Ep. 9
Episode 8 Pillows and Cults PLANET - 512902-⭄ Hypnos Soulbiter requests a planet were even the most insomniac of non-sleepers can lay a weary head but warns that the sleep may be permanent. Consultant recommendation; Golden pillows floating. Brass bells chiming. Monster lurking. Dreams eaten. All hail Hypnos Soulbiter ###ERROR, HERESY REDACTED### ALL HAIL THE BOARD . Content Warning for: Comedic violence Emotional Abuse Alcoholism Special thanks to Kate Onyett for this episode's Planet Brief Sub...
Mar 22, 2019•20 min•Season 1Ep. 8
Episode 7 Trash and Mysteries PLANET - 512901-🜃 Lady Wimr Ikipidsah requests a planet where all the lost and found items of the universe end up. All of the items are mysteriously grouped together making a whole continent of odd socks from all the species of the universe that have feet. Consultant recommendation; Trash collecting black holes. Unknowable sorting system. Self-continenting socks. Fun trash sorting activities provided gratis. Content Warning for: Comedic violence Violence to Animals...
Mar 15, 2019•22 min•Season 1Ep. 7
PLANET - 512900-🝘 Megatron_46 requests a planet dedicated to the consumption of rare delicacies and the native species of the planet must be unfeasibly aggressive in everything they do. Consultant recommendation; Prank based planet. Psychically traumatised animals. Planet-wide dining table of massively varying scale. Laser weapons for guests to kill and cook their food. Prank - self evident. Content Warning for: Comedic violence Violence to animals Emotional abuse Alcoholism Emotional tra...
Mar 08, 2019•23 min•Season 1Ep. 6
Episode 5 Fear and Feet PLANET - REVIEW Citizen Line Manager H. Piltz (ID 63277482) reviews the performance of Citizen Employee T. Geistman (ID 362884) and Bio Facsimile David 7 (ID 95847335). Line manager recommendation: Fewer larvae fatalities, lower ego, no armed pets, less idolatry, feet in mouth. Content Warning for: Comedic violence Emotional abuse Alcoholism Accidental death Accidental genocide Manslaughter Electrocution Special thanks to this week's Patrons: stickyshoelaces, RJ, sarah ra...
Mar 01, 2019•20 min•Season 1Ep. 5
Episode 4 Bowels and Dogs PLANET - 512899-Ꝅ Lead Singer of The Winter Lettuce Collective requests a Planet to reflect their brilliance including a sky mood ring. Consultant Recommendation; Pod category planet in the shape of a lettuce. Pod contains a library of all the clients achievements. Grand atrium with optional memorials to murder and accidental death. Dogs with/without knives. Internal clouds with laser projections to display moods. Constant questions to establish moods. Content War...
Feb 22, 2019•27 min•Season 1Ep. 1
Episode 3 Gods and Trousers PLANET - 512898-Ꜿ Mitsy Van Schuten – 4th wife to the President of the Mars Concordant requests a planet dedicated to cute animals with particular focus on the fauna of old earth. Consultant Recommendation; Stock biome variation display planet. Planet in synchronous rotation with star to create dark side and light side. Light side: living animals to be hunted with provided weaponry. Dark side: dead animals to be resurrected with provided weaponry. Clients to be as god...
Feb 19, 2019•23 min•Season 1Ep. 3
Episode 2 Studs and Blood PLANET - 512897-Ꝙ Burn Market the 23rd Earl of Armica requests a planet dedicated to the production of Holovision programming with suggestive names included for landmarks. Consultant Recommendation; Category 4 sized planet. Divided into rectangles for each production. Suited to blood sports and dramatic productions. Wild climate variation to provide jeopardy. Suggestive names included in a brown paper bag. Content Warning for: Comedic violence Emotional abuse Alcoholism...
Feb 15, 2019•21 min•Season 1Ep. 2
Episode 1 Troughs and Goo PLANET - 512896-A Citizen Employee T. Geistman (ID 362884) is paired with new Bio Facsimile David 7 (ID 95847335). Client Nurturer 163 of the Superfluous Tentacle requests a hatchling world for the breeding of young. Consultant Recommendation: Trough shaped world. Seas: Boiling. Entrance via cushioned chute. Egress via teen spaceport. Ceremonial daggers provided for all. Content Warning for: Comedic violence Emotional abuse Alcoholism Special thanks to Bec Savage ...
Feb 15, 2019•21 min•Season 1Ep. 11
Trailer Recycling Citizen Employee T. Geistman (ID 362884) submits Bio Facsimile David 6 (ID 95847336) to summary slurriment and recycling. Content Warning for: Comedic violence Emotional Abuse If you'd like to support the show join them be sure to visit www.patreon.com/rustyquill Created by Tim Meredith and Ben Meredith Produced by Lowri Ann Davies Executive Producer Alexander J Newall Performances: Trexyl Geistman: Tim Meredith David 6: Ben Meredith Editing: Alexander J Newall Music: Samuel DF...
Feb 05, 2019•2 min•Season 1Ep. -1
Season 1 AdSpot Employee introduction and disciplinary action Citizen Employee T. Geistman (ID 362884) submits Bio Facsimile David 7 (ID 95847336) to standard disciplinary action. Content Warning for: Comedic violence Emotional Abuse If you'd like to support the show join be sure to visit www.patreon.com/rustyquill Created by Tim Meredith and Ben Meredith Produced by Lowri Ann Davies Executive Producer Alexander J Newall Performances: Trexyl Geistman: Tim Meredith David 7: Ben Meredith Editing: ...
Feb 05, 2019•39 sec•Season 1Ep. -2
