It is time to get solar powered. We welcome you back to another episode of the solar powered podcast. My name is Ryan Hall from Royal Hearts Coaching. Royalheartscoaching.com. Life and relationship coaching for kings. And this is, this is gonna be a solo episode today, but this is, I believe, gonna be a pretty special episode for me.
As this episode is going up on March 10, 2021, I up I I, I uploaded episode 3 on March 10, 2020, and this was kind of a significant day because March 12th is my birthday. And I've got a really special episode uploading, on my birthday this year. But I wanted to just kinda have some reflections on what has been a challenging year, but what I think has been an incredibly beautiful, transformative, and just really an incredible year. Now admittedly, this time last year, I was still a bit in shock.
I was still a bit in shock because I had just gotten kicked out of my home, and I had started living in this, in, in this hotel. And just full disclosure, I am still at this hotel, but I've accepted that. I have accepted that because, you know, it's a roof over my head. It's, you know, better than living out on the streets, But my life has also taken a complete 180 from this time last year.
One thing is that I I discovered something that I really that I really didn't think that I could ever enjoy. I discovered how much fun it is to go outside and run. Just one of the most primal movements, one of the most primal things that a human being, that a man can do. I want I really enjoy getting out and running, and it's been driving me crazy because it's been so cold up here in Yankeeville over the past 4 months that I haven't been able to get out.
And, honestly, going out and running where there's no ice on the sidewalk and having to worry about, like, having to worry about, you know, slipping on slipping on ice. Not exactly what I call a good time. Not exactly what I call a good time, but just looking at the weather forecast here over the next few days, I might be reintroducing myself to my running shoes here.
And considering that I still like, I still see myself as but I still see myself as that fat kid that couldn't complete a run-in PE class. Yeah. It's still kind of, you know, it's still kind of a sore subject with me, but alas. Another thing that I have that I have learned about myself over the past year is that I am a lot more resilient than I could have imagined. Like, just imagine this time last year, I was just a couple months removed from losing my what I thought was my dream job.
And good lord willing, this is the last time I talk about this here on the space. But I was just a few months removed from losing what I thought was my dream job. And I was also about a week removed from losing my home and all of the fear that comes along with that. So I was in a far different place mentally, physically, and spiritually this time last year. I have grown a tremendous amount over the past year. I have grown comfortable in mice, in my, in my own skin.
I have grown comfortable in my own voice. I have grown comfortable with people again even though I haven't had physical touch in almost a year. I miss hugs. But I have grown a tremendous amount over the past year. And one thing that I have grown, I believe, the most in is in trust. Now I did not, I did not know just I'll give you a great example. I did not know Liz Hill before I sent in an application to write for the great pause. I had heard of her, but I did not know her.
But over the course of the year, she and I have, she has grown into a, a trusted friend, and we're also partnering on this new, book project, which I spoke about in my last solo episode. I did not know her from Adam's house cat, but I took a chance and was tremendously rewarded. That's just one example over the course of the year.
In fact, I had a conversation just yesterday with somebody who I I I'm not gonna go public with that yet, but it could be, I believe, something really powerful for the royal heart coaching empire moving forward. That's all I'm going to say about that. Another thing that I have learned about myself over the past year is that it is not a bad thing to reward myself, to treat myself.
1 of the greatest one of the greatest joys that I have had over the past year is going down to the Stanford, to the Stanford Mall and swiping my credit card and sitting down in a massage chair. It's that simple. I recently rewarded myself with a, well, I gifted myself rather a subscription to HBO Max, HBO's new streaming service.
And over the past few weeks, I have been revisiting my single favorite TV show of all time, A TV show about an unassuming family from the suburbs of, of Northern New Jersey. Dad is, yeah, he's a businessman. He's into, into waste management, owns a few companies. Yeah. I have been watching, I'm about midway through season 2 of the Sopranos, Watching some of those episodes for the first time in probably 20 years.
I, have I, I had to let my net my Netflix subscription lapse because of, well, my financial situation. I could not justify it, but I have since rejoined Netflix and am, you know, truly enjoying it again.
I have been, I I recently watched The Trial of the Chicago 7, which is the I guess you could call it a biopic, but it's the movie about the about the 7 guys, who were arrested around the, around the protest during the 19 68 Democrat Natick, National Convention in Chicago, written and directed by my true literary hero, mister Aaron Sorkin. Phenomenal movie, by the way. Phenomenal movie. Even though I think they did kinda, even though I think he did kind of tone down Abbie Hoffman way too much.
Over the past year, I have I you know, in this room, I have cried tears of joy, just sobbing tears of joy as I saw Landon Dickerson with a bad knee and all. When I saw Landon Dickerson carrying Nick Saban off the field after Alabama finished off Ohio State for the national championship. I have truly fallen deeper and deeper in love with music.
For a while last spring, every Thursday night, the phenomenal Tedeschi Trucks band was having weekly, weekly live streams from every Thursday night from their, from their archives of, concert videos. And they've started doing that again, although they're not free this time, but I can justify the cost of $12 a livestream, which is something I haven't always been able to say over the past year. I've also dug deeper and deeper into my healing journey.
I've dug deeper and deeper into my healing journey, and when I tell you that when I tell you that my, that my therapy has gotten intense, my therapy has gotten in freaking tense. Very intense. But I think last and certainly certainly not least, what I wanted to what I wanted to share with y'all is this. Over the past year, I believe my breakthrough has been has been this. I have learned what it means to love myself. Now I have always equated self love with cockiness, with arrogance.
I can thank some certain influences of my life for that filter, but I have always equated loving myself with, I guess, narcissism, but that's absolutely not the case. I truly believe what it means to love oneself is is just to feel freedom. And I'll tell you where I found this. I tell you where I tell you when this uncovered itself for me. It was this past summer, maybe, you know, maybe August. 1 morning, 1 Monday morning when I was off from work, I was out on a run, and I felt pretty good.
You know? It felt pretty good. I wasn't, my, my breathing was good. My feet felt good. My legs were under me. I felt good. And I just had my phone on an on a, Apple Music Mix, and the song that hit left me in in a sobbing mess right there on the sidewalk. I recognized the introduction, but I did not know it at first.
I think I think this came out maybe in 2,006, This particular song was from the Derek Trucks Band, which was his, his old solo band before they merged before he merged with Susan and, created the just the monstrosity that they have today. And I say monstrosity and with the highest possible love. I mean, I there's no questioning the fact how much I love Tedeschi Trucks band. But his old solo band was, you know, was a lot smaller.
But this the song is a cover of a song made famous by Nina Simone, and the song is I Wish I Knew How It Would Feel TO BE Free. And just knowing the background of that song, knowing the background of that song, I found myself I found myself absolutely doubled over. Because that's, to me, what self love is, is breaking free from the chains holding you back. It's not about arrogance. It's not about anything like that. It's about breaking free from the chains holding you back.
It's about breaking free from the chains holding you back. In fact, I'm going to include a link in the show notes to that song that means so much to me. But that's been my biggest lesson over the past year. It's just what it means and what it looks like to actually, maybe for the first time in my life, love myself. It's a process. It's not a light switch. It's a process. It's something that takes time and effort and practice. More than anything, it takes practice, but it just means so much.
And one more note I wanna leave you with before I go. I know that a lot of people have gone through have gone through the emotional ringer over the past year. A lot of people have gone through hell over the past year, and I get it. I really do. I get it. I feel it. I truly feel it. But never forget the lessons. Never forget the lessons that this year has that this year has presented, and never forget this lesson, the lessons never forget the lessons that life has given you.
Because I'm reminded of I'm reminded of a lyric from their one of their earlier albums, but a lyric from the great earth, wind, and fire song, mighty mighty, from the chorus. In your heart lies all the answers to the truth you can't run from. Your heart will tell you the way. Your heart will show you the way. Your heart will bring you home, and that is a stone cold promise. It's been a hell of a year. I'm grateful for everything. I'm grateful for the good. I'm grateful for the bad.
I'm grateful for the ugly, but most of all, I'm grateful to be alive. I'm grateful to be healthy. I'm grateful to be above ground, But most of all, I'm grateful to be able to speak my message of love and transformation to each and every one of you. This podcast has been one of the biggest sources of joy I've had over the past year, and I've got really big plans for this thing moving forward. And that is it for this episode of the solar powered podcast.
Next time here on the solar powered podcast, we're going to celebrate my birthday with a lady that just inspired the hell out of me when we spoke to her. Her name is Laura DeFranco. She is a she is a health and wellness coach. She is a publisher. I think she told me she has released 13 Amazon bestsellers. Truly a remarkable conversation with a remarkable lady that I can't wait to share with y'all, but that is next time on The Solar Powered Podcast.
For more information about me and about Royal Hearts Coaching, just visit my website at royalheartscoaching.com. You can also find a link on that website to sign up to possibly be an author on From Tragedy to Triumph. You can follow me on social media at Ryan Hall Writes on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram, or you can shoot me a good old fashioned email at [email protected]. But that will do it for this episode here at the solar powered podcast. I love you all so much.
Thank you all so much for listening. And until we meet again, this is Ryan Hall saying thank you for listening. So long for now and never stop getting solar powered. Take care.