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Today on Something You Should Know, have you ever not asked for a raise because you worry what your boss will think of you? If so, listen up. Then the origins of some of your favorite Christmas customs, like why we put round ornaments on a Christmas tree. The earliest Christmas trees. had red apples put on them and we have red round baubles today because when glass blowers first made decorations they made them to look like apples because that's what people were used to putting on their trees
Also, the right way to sit, and it's not sitting up straight. And how to achieve important goals in your life. And it starts with choosing the right goal. And I have a tool for that, but it's called a zero to 10 rule. So no matter what your goal are, make sure that it's a 10 for you, which means something that you really feel very strongly about. Because if it's not a 10 for you, you're not going to care enough to make the effort. All this today on Something You Should Know.
Something you should know. Fascinating intel. The world's top experts. And practical advice you can use in your life. Today, Something You Should Know with Mike Carruthers. Hi, here's a question for you. I think this has probably happened to everyone. You get your nerve up to go walk into the boss's office to ask for a raise, and then you chicken out. You don't go through with it. Well, why?
Well, for one reason, who wants to be turned down? Nobody likes hearing no when you ask for a raise. But also, I bet you wondered about your reputation. What will the boss think of you for asking? Will he or she lose respect or think you're greedy? Apparently not, according to Michael Wheeler. He's author of a book called The Art of Negotiation. He says there's a lot of research that shows that when you ask people after a negotiation how they feel about the person they just negotiated with,
The answer is entirely independent of the deal or the money that was negotiated. So if you're worried your boss will think less of you just for asking for a raise, that's likely not true. What's more important is how you ask. Making your case well and being respectful is what will get you more, if there is more to get. And that is something you should know.
For many of us, Christmas is the favorite holiday of the year. The Christmas season has a lot of meaning for a lot of people. It brings back memories of Christmases gone by. And maybe memories of people who are no longer part of our lives, but the memories are wonderful. And the glue that holds this whole season and this holiday together...
are the traditions, the rituals, the things we do only this time of year. And joining me to talk about these traditions is James Cooper. He's a web designer by trade, but has a deep love of the Christmas holiday. and has a great website you'll enjoy if you are also a fan of Christmas. The website is whychristmas.com. Hi James, Merry Christmas. Welcome to Something You Should Know.
Well, thank you for having me, Mike, and very happy Christmas. So first of all, since we celebrate Christmas on December 25th, why do we celebrate Christmas on December 25th? Yeah, the short answer is no one really knows. The long answer is it's complicated. I'll try and do my best to explain. You might have heard some people say it's because we took it from the Romans. That kind of doesn't really fit if you look really at the evidence. The earliest records...
of people trying to find out when to celebrate the birth of christ was actually to do with his death because in the early church the early christians there was kind of a belief that you are important people especially prophets and so especially the son of god was born and died on the same day And they were trying to work out when Jesus died. And they came up with the date.
of the 25th of march as a good consensus date because there were various dates in and around that time but they chose the 25th of march and it changed from the belief that you were born and died on the same day to you were and died on the same day so if you then put nine months onto the conception of Jesus being on the 25th of March you get his birth on the 25th of December
Now that happened to coincide with several other midwinter festivals, so it worked quite well. But the earliest evidence seems to be that it was actually the early church working out the death of Jesus rather than anything to do with his birth, which is kind of surreal. But there we go. So let's talk about Christmas ornaments, the decorations you put on your Christmas tree. Where did that tradition come from?
Okay, yeah, the earliest Christmas trees seems to have actually come from trees that were paraded around towns in the early Middle Ages as part of what were known as paradise trees or miracle trees. There were plays put on outside churches on traditionally on Christmas Eve, telling the story from creation up to the time of Jesus, kind of like an old version of Handel's Messiah.
basically and to drum up um support and interest in their plays and they would carry around branches of apple trees or just dead you know not the fur trees as we think of them today but branches of trees frames of trees and they were decorated with apples traditionally because they represented the Garden of Eden and so the earliest trees had red apples put on them and then when trees became popular as an indoor custom firstly in northern germany and people started decorating fir trees
they still traditionally put things like apples on them. And we have red round baubles today because when glassblowers first made decorations, they made them to look like apples because that's what people were used to putting on their trees. And I think I saw on your website, it was Woolworths, the chain of retail stores that first started selling glass ornaments, right?
Yeah, they were the ones that sort of did the first big introduction, certainly into the States. They came over from Germany, from Bavarian glassblowers. as and and you also had things like gingerbread that were put on trees um shapes cut out of bits of paper stars and angels and things like that but yeah the first commercial ornaments
came in the way of glass blown ornaments. And the big ones were from the walrus. But before that, it was all kind of handmade. You'd make it at your home and stick it on your tree kind of thing. Yeah, but indeed. But Christmas trees didn't really become a thing in the US until the 1850s onwards.
before that they were you would have some of the german and dutch immigrants that would have had trees but they were looked on as a very unusual custom they only came into the uk predominantly in the 1840s the earliest tree in the uk was from one of the royal family queen charlotte who was the german wife of king george iii and she put up a huge yew tree in one of the lodges at windsor castle in 1800 it's a children's party
But Queen Victoria and her German husband, Prince Albert, really popularised the Christmas tree in the UK. And in 1848...
There was a drawing published of the royal tree at Windsor in one of the big London newspapers. And that sort of became... the ignition of the popularity of trees in the uk and then in december 1850 that same drawing and but with some early photoshop going on because they took out prince um albert's mustache and swapped the uh took off queen victoria's tiara to make it look more homely and american
And that was published in 1850 in Philadelphia. And that's when Christmas trees started to become popular in America because they were seen as sort of the fashionable British thing to do. The whole idea of when Christmas trees were first brought into the house... what was their function just a decoration because now it's the place where you put presents under it and you but but what was it just something people stuck in the corner do you have a sense of that
Yeah, well, the first ones were much smaller than we have today. They might have just been a branch or part of a tree. And they were often put on tables, on tabletops. And you'd... Traditionally, some of the earliest ones from Germany, they would have sort of a traditional sort of Christmas village was put under a little Christmas scene. And then people started when gift giving became more popular in the late Victoria.
period, it became a place that you could put your presents and then bigger trees came along and they became put on the floor and you got it from that. And so what about all this other Christmas greenery? We have wreaths, we have mistletoe, we have holly, we have the Christmas tree, we have... Are they all just offshoots of the tree, or what's the story? No, most of them are...
Pre-tree. Basically, since people have been celebrating the Windsor Solstice, which is the mark in December 21st, December 22nd, the shortest day of the year. year um having greenery in your house sort of reminded you that winter wouldn't last forever and that spring would come. And there's some thought that some greenery plants, like some of the spruces and some of the firs, actually have anti-insect.
antifungal properties to them so if you're living in a cold drafty house with lots of fleas and things actually having those strewn around on the floor would also make it smell nice and but they could help keep some of the bugs at bay which would be quite nice And what about Holly? Holly in the Middle Ages became to represent the crown of thorns that Jesus had when he died. And in Scandinavia, the translation can be the Christ thorn with the red berries being the blood of Christ.
was given the symbol the similarity of that it has to cling to something to live so Christians need to cling to God and then wreaths came farther back from that and back in the roman times they had uh wreaths given like at the olympic games and sporting events and so they was they were a sign of victory so an everlasting life because they go round and round and round so that again
was given a new meaning of the Christmas wreath became a symbol of everlasting life and sort of the turning of the year and things like that. At what point did Christmas become a holiday where you give gifts to each other. For most people, the late Victorian period. For the rich, throughout history.
back in pre-christian times in the saturnalia festivals there was an element of gift giving but it's not it's that's sometimes claimed as that's where we get gifting from but it was very different to what we'd think of as gift giving um it was more that you would actually give a bit of greenery
to someone which i think if you rocked up with a branch of holly in your hand at someone's house this christmas i don't think they'd be particularly happy with it um so but i mean certainly royalty um wanted gifts throughout history You know, it was a sign of often your actual prosperity, that you would give gifts to the royals and to people above you to try and win favour.
that was you you gave gifts to get something in return um you know royal favor and prestige and things it was only when um commercial printing and commercial goods and toys especially became more widely made in the late victorian period that it became a holiday for everyone to exchange presents we're exploring some of the origins of your favorite christmas traditions and my guest is james cooper He has a website I know you'll love. It's called whychristmas.com. So James, I remember watching...
one of the versions of the film A Christmas Carol, Ebenezer Scrooge, the one with Alistair Sim in it. I always enjoyed that movie. But I remember the Christmas dinner at Bob Cratchit's house. the night of Christmas after Scrooge has made his transformation and all that, I noticed that there was no tree, there was no gift giving, and I remember thinking, well, that's kind of an odd Christmas.
Yeah, well, I mean, The Christmas Carol was published in 1843. So that's five years before the Christmas tree became popular in the UK. So that's why there's no tree mentioned in the book. There is greenery, but it's just... hanging around the house and being put decorated on top of things like um paintings and mirrors and things like that rather than a big sort of centerpiece yeah and there is no gift giving it was a much more quiet
celebration and it lasted and it started on December the 25th and your Christmas celebrations lasted until December the 5th sorry January the 5th which was Epiphany Eve for the 12 days of Christmas that was when you had your Christmas feasting and Christmas holidays.
You had Advent before Christmas, which was a much quieter time and a religious time. After the Industrial Revolution, when people were working in factories rather than out in farms in towns and villages, You generally had Christmas off, but then the bosses wanted you back at work as soon as Christmas holiday was over.
You all then started to get what we associate with Christmas now happening in December. But before the sort of mid-1800s, it all happened after Christmas, between Christmas and the start of January. So I know it's a fairly lengthy story, but I bet you're pretty good at making it shorter, is the history of Santa Claus and how we got to the Santa we're at today from when this all started.
Sure. Well, the original Santa was a man called Nicholas and he became Saint Nicholas. And that's where we get the name Santa Claus for. That went through a few changes on its own. First of all, Nicholas... was a bishop who lived in the fourth century in a place called myra in asia minor which is now in turkey back then it was part of greece
He was a Christian and he was orphaned at a fairly young age, but he was very rich and he was known for his generosity and gift giving. And one of the most famous stories about Nicholas is that there was a family in the... village that he lived that had three daughters and they were very poor family and the daughters couldn't afford dowries so that would basically mean that they couldn't get married so the daughters would have had to go into prostitution
So as he was a kind man, Nicholas dropped a bag full of gold either down the chimney or through the window. And if it went down the chimney, it fell into a stocking. And if it goes through the window, it fell into a pair of shoes. And you either get...
presents now in stockings or shoes depending on what part of the world you live in and he did this for the first two daughters and the father wondered who was given these kind gifts and he finally caught up with saint nicholas and told everybody about his generosity and And the story of St. Nicholas's generosity travelled around Europe, especially northern Europe, into parts of Germany, France, and especially in the Netherlands and Belgium. And St. Nicholas became known as Sinterklaas.
and in the netherlands and belgium and other parts of europe sinter class is still separate from santa even though his name is derived from um sinter class because sinter class came with american settlers dutch american settlers over to america and english and irish and other american settlers couldn't pronounce interclass so they turned it into santa claus and then it came
back into the rest of the world from america so it's a very convoluted way that we get the name from saint nicholas to santa claus um but yeah if if you had a couple of um on the 16th of november this year sinter class arrived on the netherlands in his steamboat from madrid because sinter class and santa claus are two very different people and kids in the netherlands get their big presents on nicholas eve which is the 5th of january 5th of december
And yes, they believe that Sinterklaas lives in Madrid, not the North Pole. But the Santa Claus we have now is this... kind of fat jolly old elf thing which is a fairly recent creation correct isn't it coca-cola is involved in this somehow i had to less extent than people would think um the modern santa is american invention um in the 1800 in the early 1800s um
there was a poem called and old santa claus with much delight was published in a poetry book for children in 1821 in new york and that had the first illustrations of santa and a reindeer And then a couple of years later, in 1823, we had the famous poem, The Visit from St Nicholas Towards the Night Before Christmas. And that's when we learned about the reindeer. And he was described in that as a jolly old elf.
When printing and magazines came along in the later 1800s, especially... harper collins and things and things like that we got the illustrations from thomas nast which developed him into the much chubbier tubbier plumpy one that we think of as santa today and back then he wore lots of different colors
But red and white was a good colour for printing. It showed out well on magazine stands, which is one of the reasons why we get red and white. And also St. Nicholas wore red and white bishop's robes. So that's the connection goes all the way back to there. coke picked up that he was already red and white and so used it but it he was red and white long before coke came along in the 20s and 30s
And when did it become this thing where he comes on a sleigh with reindeer and brings presents down the chimney? That was from Towards the Night Before Christmas in 1823. And wasn't it that poem, Twas the Night Before Christmas, that's where the reindeer show up? Before that, he always arrived on a horse.
um it was really because um the reindeer you had some people drawing reindeer up in um the northern states in the snowy states and also up in uh norway and sweden it's thought that um cut more drew some of the inspiration from nordic traditions um of uh the sleighs over there which are pulled
by reindeer to bring the reindeer into the poem and that's where we get the reindeer from although of course rudolph only arrived in 1939 for montgomery world department stores when a book was written about him and then the cartoon was made in 48 and we have the famous song in 49. So there's a tradition, at least in the US, that seemed to have been bigger a few decades ago, but still persists, and that is Christmas cards. And I have no idea where that came from.
That's a good old British tradition, and that was invented in the same year that A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens was published, which was 1843. Christmas cards were invented... by a man called Sir Henry Cole. He was one of the founding members of the Victoria and Albert Museum over here in London. And he also helped set up the earliest UK post office.
And he invented and introduced a new cheaper form of postage stamp. So he got a friend of his called John Horsley, an artist, to design him the first Christmas card. basically to show off that you could use this cheaper penny postal service. It was kind of a marketing ploy to show that he'd got this new way of cheaper postage and he could send out these cards to his family and friends to wish them a Merry Christmas.
And it really took off from there. And then when cheaper printing came in in the 1860s and 1870s and the cost went even cheaper, then Christmas cards sort of blossomed around the world. But they don't seem to be as popular today as they did, say, in the 50s or 60s or even 70s. They seem to have, people don't seem to send them as much.
Yeah, no, I think they're there. I think they're on the way out, frankly. I think five, 10 years time Christmas, Christmas cards certainly in the UK will be a thing of the past because one postage is so expensive these days and two.
we just have other means of communication they were often a time when families would catch up once a year you know the traditional family newsletter of what's been happening through the year but now we have email and whatsapp and social media that we're in much more close communication with lots of people all over the world these days oh one more i really wanted to get you to talk about is um the poinsettias how they got mixed up in christmas because it seems odd to me
Yeah, again, they're an American thing because they come from Mexico. The poinsettia... it was made widely known because of a man called joel roberts poinsett and that's why we called them poinsettias and he was the first u.s ambassador to mexico in 1825 he had some greenhouses on his plantations in south carolina he visited mexico and saw these interesting plants growing that were beautiful colors around christmas and so he got some of the plants and took them back
to his plantation and grew them in South Carolina and then sent them out around America to his family and friends, kind of like early Christmas cards in a way. He sent them to John Bartram in Philadelphia.
who was a big botanical name in philadelphia and that's where they became uh they really bloomed into popularity as a christmas plant because they were something again with the reds and the greens that were already associated with christmas that they just really fitted with christmas decorations Well, it's always fun and interesting to hear the backstories.
of all our holiday traditions. I just really enjoy listening to this. James Cooper has been my guest, and he has a website. If you're into Christmas at all, you've got to check out his website. It is whychristmas.com. whychristmas.com, and I'll put a link to it in the show notes. Thank you, James. Well, thank you very much for having me. It's always fun to do these sorts of things.
According to a survey that you're about to hear about, for people who set goals, who commit to making a change in their life, whether that be for health or career or whatever, Only 6% actually achieved the goal they set. Now, there's good news and bad news in that statistic. The bad news is that a 94% failure rate is rather dismal. But the good news is...
That 6% pulled it off. They achieved their goal. So, what can we learn from that 6%? How did they achieve their goal when so many others failed? And how can you use that strategy to achieve goals in your life? That's what you are about to discover from my next guest, Dr. Michelle Rosen. She's a much sought-after speaker on leadership, motivation, and change.
She works with brands like Pfizer, Merrill Lynch, Coca-Cola, and others. And she is author of a book called The 6% Club, Unlock the Secret to Achieving Any Goal and Thriving in Business and Life. Hi, Michelle. Welcome. Glad to have you on Something You Should Know. Hi, Mike. I'm so glad to be here. So what is, do you think, the big problem that people have? Because when you think about it, if I set a goal, if something I want to do...
why is it so hard to do? I mean, it's my goal. I've said it. So why do people struggle with this? People struggle with setting goals because they're not doing it the right way. And nobody ever teaches you, Mike, how to do it. So what they do is, you know, we're always told, oh, you should have a list of goals. And that's considered to be like advanced.
You just don't have them in your head. You have a list. But what actually happens is that setting a goal and automating that new behavior in the human brain. It's not easy. It's a process. And so when people set too many goals, the brain gets overwhelmed and the brain says, I don't know how to do all these new things at once. I mean, you started the year, you have like these 10 things that you want to change. And so people get overwhelmed. They drop the whole thing.
So talk about that survey that you did, because I think that's kind of the beginning point for this whole discussion. So explain what you did. On January 2023, I surveyed after being so many years in the space and the field of change, I surveyed 1000 people all over the US.
And all of them, like so many of us said, oh, yeah, you know, I'm going to do all these amazing things and I'm going to lose the weight. I'm going to save more money. I'll be more present with my team. I'm going to do better with my business. I'll spend more time with my kids. whatever their goal was. And what I found out was that no matter what category, no matter what it is that those people wanted to do, 94% of the people surveyed dropped their goals within the first 60 days.
Which is a lot of goals not achieved, but those 6%, the other 6% that did achieve them, what did they do differently that allowed them to achieve their goal? One of the things that the six percenters do differently is they pick one goal at the time for 30 days and do only that. So rather than trying to do this and this and this and that.
overwhelm your brain drop the whole thing they say okay for the next 30 days i'm going to go to the gym every day at six o'clock repeat repeat repeat for 30 days it automates that new behavior in the brain Then they pick another goal. Then they pick another. The domino effect of rather than overwhelming yourself with a lot of things, getting overwhelmed, drop the whole thing. How do you get really specific and granular and nail down those new habits one at a time?
30 days. And in that 30 days, as I'm going through and going to the gym every day at six o'clock, and then on Thursday, something comes up. And now I've missed the gym because I had to go to the kids' school or something. And something happens. And then the next day I'm thinking, well, I missed yesterday. And then what? So think about it this way, Mike. Let's say that the beginning of the year...
You had, I'm just going to come up with a random number. You had 12 goals for yourself. And let's say, because you're talking about what happens if I drop the ball, which happens to so many people, because you know what? We're human. We're not machines. We're not robots. life gets in the way and it can be that you couldn't go to the gym or it could be that you wanted to save this much money every month and you had this whole system or every week and then
a big expense came, something, life happens. And so what the six percenters do differently is they say, okay, instead of saying, okay, I have 12 goals, get overwhelmed, drop the whole thing. let's say that they have 12 goals. They kill them one at the time, nail them one at the time. And let's say that in the course of a year, the year, Mike, you dropped your goal. You dropped the ball on four things. You were still able.
to automate eight different new healthy behaviors in the course of the year. That's a huge amount of change. Now think about year two. Now think about year three. That's a transformation. So the system is very simple. The system says, hey, you dropped the ball on something that you wanted to do. Don't beat yourself up. Don't be hard on yourself. All you need to do is go back to the beginning line and repeat, repeat, repeat for 30 days.
One of the things that I've tried to do better, and this has been a frustration for me, is, you know, I have like a bowl that I put my keys in my glasses and my wallet when I come home. But sometimes I don't. And then I can't find them. And I try I try very diligently. And I every day I go looking for them. And some days they're there and some days they're not. And it's just it's very.
frustrating because something will happen or I'll come in a different door and put my stuff down there. And it just, there's always something that kind of throws a monkey wrench into the system. Yeah. I love how you bring that up, Mike, because sometimes the things that frustrate us, when people talk about goals, they think, oh, big, I'm going to...
Change the world. No, no, no. Most of people have goals that start from very everyday things, you know, and that's the right place to start. You start with the small things and you. start building those new habits you start practicing what the six percenters do differently and so back to the point that you're bringing up it's such a good point because
One of the things that the six percenters do differently is that instead of relying on their willpower, which is what you're doing, you're relying on your willpower to remember to put the keys away when you come into the house, but you get distracted. And there are other things that are happening. Rather than relying on their willpower, they manipulate their environment. That means that either you set a reminder on your phone.
Or you move where that jar is so that it reminds you. Or you put a piece of paper on the floor so that as soon as you come in, there's a piece of paper, a note that says, put the keys in the jar. Do you see what I'm saying? You know, we spend a lot of energy. There's a tendency to spend a lot of energy on relying on our willpower. Oh, I'm not going to, you know, eat late at night or I'm not going to forget to drink water or, you know, or I won't forget to put my keys away.
But willpower is very flimsy. You know, if you're tired, hungry, you had a bad day, it's just not there anymore. So instead of relying on their willpower, the six percenters manipulate their environment. I bet if you had a sign on the floor when you open the door or on the.
wall in front of you that said, put keys away in the jar. You did that for 30 days. After 30 days, it's automated in your brain. The door opens. You're like, oh yeah, I got to put the keys in the jar. I've done that before. I have that neural pathway in my brain. What are some of the common goals people have a problem with? Everybody wants to be healthier. People want to have better relationships.
There's a lot of pain around loneliness and relationships. I noticed that in the research and money. People want to have more money, do better financially. So at the end of the day, everybody wants to. live better. And there's a tremendous amount of pain in the world, especially these days, with people that want things, with their relationships, with their money, with their health, and they keep dropping the ball.
A lot of times people ask me, oh, you know, Michelle, how do I, why do I lack confidence? How do I get more confident? And you know, Mike, confidence breeds success. Success breeds confidence. And what's nice about the 6% Club is... that you start from the little things you automate them you know you start small and it works
And then you say to yourself, wow, this is really cool. I am putting the keys away. I am going to the gym every day. This is so cool. Let me pick a bigger goal. And you follow the same methodology and it's not complicated and it's not overwhelming. And it works. So then your confidence grows. You know, you say to yourself, oh my gosh, I'm so cool. I did it.
Let me pick a bigger goal. And so there's an accumulating effect of generating those successes, you know, one after the other, one after the other, start small. It gets big over time. And so in that respect, it's a process of becoming you become, you know, a six percenter. A lot of people come to me and they say, you know what, Michelle, I'm going to be a six percenter.
And I know that it's possible because it's very underwhelming. It's really not complicated. It's just a different approach to creating a list and doing all those things and overwhelming yourself. So take, if you can, take a couple of those things you said that people want to live better, so they want more money, they want to be healthy, and create a common goal and how do you put your toe in the water?
I'll give you a real-life example. Last week, I'm giving a keynote. One of the attendees goes up to the stage, and she shared that her goal is to eat healthier. She's telling the audience, I'm working with a new coach at the gym and I want to eat healthier. And the coach also said that I need to eat healthier, but I can't do it. You know, every time I say I'm going to eat healthier.
And it's not working out for me. And the coach is a little annoyed with me and I don't know what to do. So what we did together, I said to her, listen, eating healthier is very overwhelming because. What does that even mean? You know, if for the last 30 days, 30 years, you're used to eating in a certain way.
your brain gets so overwhelmed like what do you mean what does that even mean drops the whole thing so i said for the next 30 days all you're gonna do is just change your lunch that's all you're gonna focus on i don't care what you eat for the rest of the day you're gonna do that you can automate it after you automate it for 30 days once you hit the 30 days mark it's automated in your brain now just change your snack and i said if you look at
The next six months, your likelihood of succeeding in changing your eating habits in the next six months, if you follow that methodology versus I'm going to eat healthier, get overwhelmed, drop the whole thing is incredibly. higher and that's how you reach transformation how about like i know people there's a huge problem with people not saving money and but it's such a it's such a big thing like
You know, saving $5 is not like doing much, so people just go, oh, screw it, and they don't do anything. So how do you set that 30-day thing up so it becomes a habit? So let's take just what you said, Mike. I love that because that was so specific and granular, right? I call that the law of specification. So you were just super specific. You said $5 every day, right? So if you said for the next 30 days.
All I need to do is every day, I need to transfer $5 into this saving account. Super simple. Problem is, like you said, people are like, oh, you know, I was busy today. I didn't do it. I don't know if it's even going to work. But that's the goal you set for yourself. The first thing you do, you manipulate your environment. So you set a reminder on your phone every day at the same time. So let's say 15 minutes before dinner, you transfer $5 to your savings account.
Every day at the same time, because your goal is to automate. And so you set a reminder on your phone. I promise you after the 30 days, Mike. Even if you don't have a reminder on your phone, you're going to be like, what time is it? 545. What do I do at 545? I transfer $5 into my savings account. And so that's how you use. It's a specific goal. It's very attainable.
All you need to do is automate it. And then it becomes a habit. And then you can say, you know what? Second month, I'm going to transfer $10 into my savings account every day at 545. So you do that. And so over time, you get yourself into habits that build you. And you can do that in every single aspect of your life. It's simple. It's specific. It's doable. And it's a lot more attainable than to say.
I'm going to save so much more money this year. You know, definitely going to do it. Get overwhelmed. The brain doesn't even know what it means. Drop the whole thing. So much more attainable. So much simpler. Well, that brings up a point about goals because people often say, well, you know, I want to have more money. I want to be healthier. I want to...
Well, there's no way to measure that you ever get there because that's not really a goal. What's more money? What's healthier? It doesn't mean anything. Exactly. And that's what your brain says. Your brain says, I don't know what you mean. Think about it this way, Mike. The brain takes about 20% of the overall body energy. So the brain is very costly to the body in terms of energy. 20% is a lot.
And it's 20% just to do what you know how to do already, just to live. Every time you ask your brain to do something different, to start a new habit, you're asking for a lot. And so your brain would prefer.
to do what it knows how to do already. So if you say every time, oh yeah, I'm going to save so much more money and you don't do it. The next time you say it, your brain would say, can we just, can we just do that? Can we just like drop the whole thing? Cause that's what you, I have a neural pathway for that. If you want to curb your brain's tendency to pull you towards your old habits, the only way you can do that is...
by using what I call the law of specification, which means you get really specific and granular. Don't just say, I'm going to save more money. get as specific and as granular as possible so you say i'm gonna save five dollars a day i'm gonna save a hundred dollars a month i'm gonna do that every last day of the month whatever it is that your plan is
Be as specific and as granular as possible. Otherwise, I promise you, your brain will prefer just for saving energy purposes to pull you towards your old ways. And that's not what you want. Well, I understand what you said about setting these big, huge goals, but can you set them too small? And what I mean by that is, if you make it a habit to send $5 a day to your savings account,
Okay, it's something to remember. Every single day, and at the end of the month, $5 a day, look at what you've got. Hardly anything. Was it worth it? Maybe you should have shot a little higher. There's nothing wrong. with setting big goals. Nothing wrong. I love setting big goals. I set big goals for myself. I think that big goals are exciting. As long as you take whatever goals and
Whatever goal you have for yourself, you don't owe anyone an explanation why you want to save $5 or why you want to save $1,000 or why you want to take, doesn't matter. It has to be important for you. And I have a tool for that, but it's called the zero to 10 rule. And the zero to 10 rule is a tool for a lot of things. But one of the things that it measures is how much you care about something, right?
If you don't really care, I asked my daughter the other day, my youngest one, my 16 year old, you know, she said she's not going to the gym as much as she thought she would. And I said, how much do you care about it? Zero to 10. That's the zero to 10 rule. And she said, actually. Four. So I said, well, that's why you're not going. It's not important enough for you.
So no matter what your goal are, make sure it doesn't matter, big or small, you don't owe anyone an explanation. Make sure that it's a 10 for you, which means something that you really feel very strongly about. Because if it's not a 10 for you.
You're not going to care enough to make the effort. And so you pick something that's a 10 for you. It can be big. It can be small, no matter what it is. And you go for it and you manipulate your environment. You get really specific and granular. It's not complicated. Super practical. And whatever it is that you want for yourself, go ahead and do it because it's in your hands. You don't have to be the kind of person that talks about goals, gets overwhelmed, drops the whole thing.
Whatever your goals are, you can get there. You just have to use the right methodology. There are some goals, though, that... that are really hard. It isn't just a matter of remembering to do it. I mean, losing weight, I mean, statistically, your chances are just so, so low that you will... Take the weight off and keep it off. Stopping smoking is really hard to do, even if you're committed to doing it. There are some where the odds are really, the deck is stacked against you.
You don't care about the statistics. You care about yourself. And whatever it is that you want to do, you can do. A lot of people stop smoking and... They just decide that it's a 10 for them and they go for it. A lot of people do amazing things with weight or amazing things with health because it's a 10 for them.
It doesn't matter what this, don't look at the statistics. It doesn't matter what other people do. And it's not a matter of remembering to do it. It's a matter of manipulating your environment to do it and being very specific. If you don't look to the left, don't look to the right. Don't look at people on social media. Don't look at the numbers. Look at yourself. What do you really want to do that is really important for you right now? That is a 10. Get specific, get granular and know.
that you can do it doesn't matter what other people can and cannot do what about the idea of if you have a goal of doing it trying to achieve it with along with somebody else That's amazing. That's wonderful. As long as that someone supports you. So there's going to be people around you. And we do talk about. the people that surround you. There's going to be people around you that will tell you that you can't do it. All you need to do is focus and follow the methodology.
it's going to generate success so surround yourself with people that support you and then if you have those people as a support system as accountability buddies it's amazing because it's going to make you stronger. So mind the people that surround you and make sure that you surround yourself with people that support you, uplift you, and share your optimistic and justified crushing your goals.
It would seem that, you know, sometimes people do things not because they're all that enthusiastic about it, but it's because other people are nagging them. Oh, you got to lose some weight. Oh, you really should stop smoking. Oh, give it a try. And there isn't a big commitment to it. You're either doing it because somebody else wants you to or... But there isn't a lot of momentum built behind this. So let's apply the 0 to 10 rule here. It's not going to work.
It's not going to work because you don't care enough. If you really care about something, you're going to do amazing at getting there. You just need the right methodology. But if you don't care enough, you just don't care enough. You've got to have a sit down with yourself and ask yourself. what do i really want what is a 10 for me right now and you don't owe anyone an explanation for why your 10 is your 10. but whatever that 10 is go get it yeah and if it's not a 10 for you then
When you think about it, well, why bother? This has been great. I've been talking with Dr. Michelle Rosen. She's author of the book, The 6% Club, Unlock the Secret to Achieving Any Goal and Thriving in Business and Life. And there's a link to her book in the show notes. Thanks for talking about this, Michelle. I appreciate the insight and the enthusiasm. It's contagious. Thank you so much, Mike.
I'm sure you were told since you were very, very young to sit up straight. But some experts say that's actually bad advice for your back. Sitting up straight... in a chair puts strain on your spine and ligaments, and over time, that can lead to pain and deformity and chronic illness. That doesn't mean you should slouch or lean forward either. That's even worse.
The best position for your back is leaning slightly back at an angle of about 135 degrees. If you work at a computer, give your back a break and recline a little bit. And don't forget to get up and walk around. It is one of the best things you can do for your back. And that is something you should know. Our producers are Jeffrey Havison and Jennifer Brennan. Our executive producer is Ken Williams. I'm Mike Carruthers. Thanks for listening today to Something You Should Know.
There is a fascinating and unique podcast I'd like you to check out, as I have. It's called Only One in the Room. A few years back, Laura Cathcart-Robbins attended a writer's retreat where out of 600 attendees... she was the only black one. So later, she wrote about her experience and the article went viral because people understand what it feels like to be the only one in the room.
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Every week, Laura and her co-host Scott Slaughter invite you to join them for an hour and lose yourself in someone's only one story. Check out Only One in the Room wherever you get your podcasts. Buffet brawlers. Glory holes gone wrong? Cannibalistic castration cabins? Public poopers? These are just a few of the crazy topics you'll hear covered on Excuse Me? That's Illegal! The pettiest podcast around.
Whether you need a break from all that murdery true crime stuff, or just enjoy hearing hilarious stories told in a unique way, I got what you need. I'm Leroy Luna, your fearless host slash chauffeur. So come hop in my minivan and let's go for a ride. I promise you probably won't be disappointed. Excuse me, that's illegal. It's available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, basically everywhere you consume podcasts. With new episodes dropping on the 10th, 20th, and 30th of the month, baby!