Hey, all! We thought we'd take advantage of social distancing to help Joe work on a film idea he's had rattling around, and we decided to record it and offer it up as a bonus episode! Enjoy us throwing stuff at the old shit-wall (you'll figure that one out) as we come up with a plot for Zombies are Delicious! (TMTMTMTMTMTM)
Mar 31, 2020•1 hr 26 min
We're Spring Cleaning again this week with the second installment of Wizards of the Lost Kingdom! There's still wizards. That goll-darn kingdom is still lost. But...this is a sequel in only the loosest sense of the word - and there's only so much hay you can make out of that, folks. Host segments: Beefy Guy and the Pig-Monster; Keystone campus security; lesser Carradine movies; the mystery of drammel; FatMo; A Streetcar Named FatWizard; grateful for bidets! Please be sure to like, share, rate, a...
Mar 24, 2020•1 hr 6 min
First off, we apologize for the sound quality on MiMi and Jeff's end the first half of the podcast - we had...issues. Secondly, PHONES! Host segments: sand EVERYWHERE; Drunk Stepdad and the Tallboy; Joe is triggered; pussy Charleston Chew; Jeff loves tequila; rotary phone security system; alien or angel?; lump vs. layabouts; what if we don't nuke the world?; East Idaho nihilism; Ken's lump management skills. Please be sure to like, share, rate, and subscribe. Find us on Facebook and Twitter, or ...
Mar 10, 2020•1 hr 23 min
We're taking on the doozy of the episode that is The Saga of the Viking women, which luckily is spruced up with a bit of the charm brought to you by the lovely ladies of Iowa State. In the end, we can't decide what upsets us more - the misogyny of The Home Economics Story, or the GOD-AWFUL MIND-NUMBING TEDIUM OF THESE VIKING WOMEN! You think Viking women, of ALL the women, would be a good time. Host segments: by the power of lutefisk; Corman cutting his losses; Viking pranks; we do a deep-dive i...
Feb 25, 2020•1 hr 15 min
We're tackling The Skydivers and fan-favorite short, "Why Study Industrial Arts?" Aside from wanting to talk about why you SHOULD study industrial arts, we spend most of the time trying to figure out WHY YOU WOULD WILLINGLY JUMP OUT OF AN AIRPLANE. cw: suicide, depression, molestation Host segments: Francis Coleman's Irregular Dudes; chute sack; too much skydiving in The Skydivers; porn-ception continues; Joe has three friends; the Love's BBQ van; Bound but with coveralls; Joe's too lazy for an ...
Feb 11, 2020•1 hr 22 min
It's our first episode of Spring Cleaning, and we're beginning by wrapping up the saga of Ken in Fugitive Alien 2. Spoiler alert: he doesn't get killed by a forklift in this one, either. Host segments: Idaho handshake; Sake Bombs Round 2; MiMi knows her Star Force; what has our podcast become?; Revenge of the Sith hot takes; the sushi conveyor belt that is Hollywood; there's nothing that alcohol can't solve. Please be sure to like, share, rate, and subscribe. Find us on Facebook and Twitter, or ...
Jan 28, 2020•1 hr 15 min
We're celebrating Jeff's birthday in style with one of his favorites, San Francisco International! Basically, this one just boils down to us really being on the hippie's side. Host segments: arcing ropes of comedy; Smells Like Chantilly; stocking up on obscure liqueurs; getting Urked; you know Torgo smells like poop; you can't trust a man without a chin; Jeff News; Once Upon a Time...at San Francisco International; a quiet domestic drama; fugue-state coin collector. Please be sure to like, share...
Jan 14, 2020•1 hr 19 min
Per SoL-Mates tradition, we're taking stock of our performance this year. The reviews are in. We give ourselves a "meets expectations," but we're probably not getting that "big" raise. Host segments: certain ships have sailed; Joe's Van Corner; Jack the Reddit-Namer; tying up loose ends; our listeners are WRONG; perfume on a pig; more Myra; Kitten with a Whip and our dark truths; painfully obvious; Riff MVP wrap-up. Please be sure to like, share, rate, and subscribe. Find us on Facebook and Twit...
Dec 31, 2019•49 min
This week we take on an unconventional Christmas choice, mostly because MiMi refuses to watch Santa Claus Conquers the Martians yet. Surprise! It’s Avalanche! Also, it’s our family-friendly episode, so there’s no swears, but we do talk about herpes. A lot. So take your Valtrex and have a happy holiday, from the SoL-Mates! Host segments: Capable Man!; support your local MSTie; incarnations of Gypsy; by Hoyle toxic masculinity; Polar vs. Snowball Express; what if any of the subplots were fleshed o...
Dec 17, 2019•1 hr 4 min
This week, we’re tackling Turkey Day favorite Laserblast. Basically, this episode comes down to us not being sure exactly what the deal is with Billy and his mom. Or Billy and his girlfriend. Or Billy and…well…anyone. Host segments: Billy’s mom has got it going on; Jeff has theories; an episode full of homages; all the subtext with none of the plot; sexual assault as a plot point; Jeff’s terrible Home Alone; Van Chat with Joe; Riff MVP Ralph Nader CW: sexual assault, incest Please be sure to lik...
Dec 03, 2019•1 hr 17 min
This time the SoL-Mates are taking on Circle of Death! Oh, we mean Ring of Terror! One of the most important questions for this episode is: can Devori's nostalgia for her first-ever MST3K episode translate to deep love nearly 30 years later? It turns out, no - no it can't. Host segments: the great "they" debate; et tu Phantom Creeps?; Joe and Devori met Joel!; that's the rattlesnake's car now; the elephant in the room; an abandoned anthology series. Please be sure to like, share, rate, and subsc...
Nov 19, 2019•1 hr 13 min
We're tackling another listener request this week - and we have thoughts about it. In fact, we all have notes. You should know that Joe DID cut out a startling conversation where MiMi and Devori discovered just how many Manitou novels there are. (CW: sexual assault) Host Segments: Don't bag on Myrtle; Devori's shocking admission; southern roadkill on the skids; a drunken walk down memory lane; the saga of Craig; Dirty Hairy; Tim is the final girl; Jeff delivers a forceful review. Please be sure ...
Nov 05, 2019•1 hr 12 min
It's the spoopiest time of the year, so it's time for SoL-Mates annual Halloween Spoopie! episode. Thrill in mild terror to stories that Joe *would have cut for time if he could*. MUAH! GHOST Segments: Crimson Foyer; Jeff is touched by an evil clown; MiMi reminds us that water babies are a thing; Joe's close encounter. Please be sure to like, share, rate, and subscribe. Find us on Facebook and Twitter, or on our Subreddit r/ArcaneJuggzz. All Rowsdower Cocktail Hour recipes are archived in our Su...
Oct 29, 2019•27 min
It's the spookiest time of the year, and we couldn't think of any better way to commemorate episode 69 (nice) than with one of the sexiest films Rifftrax ever tackled - Rock 'n Roll Nightmare! Behold the greasy nips of Jon Mikl-Thor! Behold the teased and lethal hair! Behold the not-very-good not-very-metal soundtrack! But more than anything, behold one of the most amazing riffs we've ever...well, beheld. Basically, behold all this shit. Host segments: the origin of back-bacon; WHAT IS THIS MOVI...
Oct 22, 2019•1 hr 3 min
This week we tackle the movie MiMi ACTUALLY wanted to watch - and we really have to ask ourselves why. What's up with Tang? Why is he LIKE that? Could ANYONE understand the admiral -- or were they just going along to keep the peace? WHAT IS GOING ON, MOVIE? (CW - racism, domestic abuse) *Note: we had some minor audio issues in the last 1/3 of the episode or so. Please forgive our mess. We'll do better next time.* Host segments: comic antagonism; then they do it; because time dilation; Joe was so...
Oct 08, 2019•56 min
Folks. It turns out this week we watched an episode MiMi wanted to watch, only for her to discover when we started to watch it that she actually wanted to watch another episode. We know why, now. We'll watch the right one next time. We promise. Host segments: God bless Joe; junk drawer trauma; why you do Sumiko like that?; makin' fun of Euro-trash; OMAGHA!; Joe's pro tips; slap Gig Young; getting probed; fapping away. Please be sure to like, share, rate, and subscribe. Find us on Facebook and Tw...
Sep 24, 2019•1 hr 6 min
We're tackling a listener DARE this week. Not a request. A DARE. And we say, "Challenge accepted." Well. Devori did. She's not sure the rest of the SoL-Mates like her anymore. Join us as we talk about the mystery that is the not-as-good-as-Prince-of-Space spectacle, Invasion of the Neptune Men. Also, enjoy the extremely graphic IotNM as steak gristle meat-aphor. Host Segments: The power of Newton compels you; longing for Commando Cody; no befriending Pearl; chief/prince hierarchy; Joe's mind get...
Sep 10, 2019•1 hr 15 min
We’re wrapping up a fishy summer with the Mike-era classic, Devil Fish. Just be glad that you don’t see us all wearing our distressingly tiny shorts, but that won’t save you from the bad Italian accents. Perhaps it’s seeing so many Italian men’s hangers that makes this episode extra gross. Or we’re just gross. You decided. Host segments: CSI Martha; potential poon vs. resident poon; going full Bobo; those are balls; barnacle boner; tub death; bad borrower. Please be sure to like, share, rate, an...
Aug 27, 2019•1 hr 22 min
It’s not quite Shark Week over here at SoL-Mates, but we figured talking about the Gauntlet favorite Killer Fish would be a reasonable facsimile. If you’re so inclined, check out the episode of Suicide Buddies (co-hosted by Hampton Yount himself) discussing Margaux Hemingway’s suicide. https://player.fm/series/series-2293060/margaux-hemingway Host Segments: Jeff Old-Mansplains Piranha-phobia; trying to fill in all these plot-holes; MiMi’s a robot purist; a Brazillion degrees; gem-stuffed invasiv...
Aug 13, 2019•1 hr 17 min
For our final episode in our “Summer of Mis-Spent Youth,” we tackle perhaps the most baffling of all the teenage criminal movies – Kitten with a Whip. Like David Stratton, we just can’t quit Jody. But we’re more than capable of shouting our advice at him anyway. Listen for a poignant moment when Devori’s soul leaves her body in frustration. (cw: murder, molestation in reference to the plot). Host Segments: Vicky Mendoza Parallel; Kitten ex Machina; Jeff gets real dark; Sex Kitten Castle Doctrine...
Jul 30, 2019•1 hr 17 min
Wow - Mamie Van Doren has...talents! And we talk about both of them in our episode covering Untamed Youth! What happens when rowdy teens are only mildly rowdy? It should be noted that Joe cut out probably the most scintillating discussion for time - Devori talking about the war between barber-surgeons and physicians. But - it turned out pretty good anyway. (cw: miscarriage, sexual assault, racial slur) Host Segments: #HerToo; we could take a toddler; Jeff has a problem with authority; Joe's ode ...
Jul 16, 2019•1 hr 25 min
This episode ended up a touch longer than normal, but that’s only because we’re such a fan of teenage stranglers. No – people who strangle teenagers. Wait – this is coming out all wrong. *backs out of room* *turns off lights* Strangling semantics; life with Mikey; barf medium; Jeff gets defensive – just like an only child; Devori’s Wide Wide World of Serial Killers; hysterical feedback loops; our content is a good size; MiMi absolutely won’t do that; we have strong opinions about janitors; our M...
Jul 02, 2019•1 hr 29 min
This week, we talk about a movie about beatniks that inexplicably has no beatniks in it. Seriously. Not a beatnik to be seen. There’s a crooner. Some juvenile delinquents, maybe. But we didn’t see one beret. Nor did anyone snap. And we watched really carefully. Host segments: You Might Be A Beatnik; do these people have parents?; Tony Travis is The One; dill comma whole; hungover children; Harry’s got a type; aggressively apathetic; arcanejuggzz is a thing.
Jun 18, 2019•1 hr 5 min
This episode, we're delving into one of our favorite Rifftrax Lives - Jack the Giant Killer! Along the way, we find we just can't help bringing up Samantha Fox...again. Listen as Devori is slowly driven mad by her own childhood existential crises and her fear of 1960s-era Disney animation. You can also audibly hear the moment Jeff is reminded that Birdemic exists. Host segments: the pragmatics of life riffing; a history of Jack the Giant Killer; evil wizard logistics; www.arcanejugs.com vs. www....
Jun 04, 2019•1 hr 11 min
Magical May™ continues with the Bert I. Gordon clunker (or banger, depending on to whom you speak) The Magic Sword. More importantly, this is the episode when we FINALLY explain broasting to Jeff. Host segments: durty Joel; a satchel of Richards; the logic of circulating the tapes; SLP; friend zone; Sybil Wick; The One Where They Pause Riff MVP to Explain Broasting to Jeff. Please remember to like, share, rate, and subscribe. We're on Twitter at @solmatespod and on Facebook at SolMates MST3K pod...
May 21, 2019•1 hr 13 min
It's officially Magical May ™ here at SoL-Mates, and we celebrate it by *checks notes* listening to Jeff talk about how much he wants to nail Samantha Fox. Mostly we're just amazed how much we relate to Kor when we come out the other side. Host Segments: The Wizard Chigur; missing David Bowie tracks; manticore padding; we don't get this kingdom; Teddy Fuxpin; Joel holds MST3K in an iron fist; Kor does anything for boobies; tripping balls on gnome wine; prepare to face the wrath of Fat Sting. Ple...
May 07, 2019•1 hr 21 min
The SoL-Mates were reunited for this episode, and it feels soooooo good. Join your favorites and a special guest as they discuss Merlin's Shop of Mystical Wonders. This one is really a feast for the ears because...well...there's Jello shots. This means there's 100% more mouth-sounds in this episode, and we didn't charge you a penny for them. Host segments: Emo Phillips visits a Renaissance faire; Joe's sex bed; Merlin abides; eminent Romaine; douchecanoe. Please remember to like, share, rate, an...
Apr 23, 2019•1 hr 13 min
AAAAH. WE'RE HUGE...fans of this episode. Well, some of us are. What does it mean to be amazing? Colossal? A man? More importantly - how does someone who decides to bull-charge an atom bomb end up being SO WHINY? Host segments: only rich kids get vitamins; The Great Hasting's Rent-Off; save me bomb; Joe goes there; Jeff comes from a long line of broads; Amazing Colossal Man 2: The Raging Nudge; The Barstow Stomper; who's afraid of going hiking in the desert now?; CONTINUING IN THE TRUE CRIME GEN...
Apr 09, 2019•1 hr 16 min
We're tackling an MST3K classic, and the take-away is WE ALL WANNA BE A DANCER! We dissect the doings of Michele, Buzz, and Critter, and marvel and the discomfort of a love triangle with the oldest greaser WITH THE WORST PLANS EVER. Also, be sure to listen to the end for our #TryPod recommendations. We'd love to hear your recommendations on Twitter or on Facebook - what podcasts make you happy? Host segments: this is a bad plan; Quantum Critter; bringing up Buzz; so shiny; jump cut lore; multi-l...
Mar 26, 2019•1 hr 21 min
We wanted to talk about hard-boiled detectives, hysterical dames, and the pseudo-scientific origins of the modern Prometheus myth, but mostly we just end up screaming about taquitos. Host segments: not normally Devori's thing; MiMi's all bitter; don't invite The Butcher to your heist; a taquito fancast; two chicks at once; hysterical in the Angry Dome; the problem with serial shorts; very intersectional; banal AND infuriating. Please remember to like, share, rate, and subscribe - find us on Twit...
Mar 12, 2019•1 hr 18 min