Decoding the Big Book - Working with Others

alcoholics. Bill's early work had helped both the New York and Akron groups find common ground on two foundational principles for Alcoholics Anonymous that the message of recovery is best delivered from one alcoholic speaking directly to another, and that reaching out to help another person is the single most effective way to ensure your own continued sobriety. These ideas were based on Bill's own experience and confirmed by almost every other early member

since then. Bill's faith in this progress was established in May 1935, when he traveled to Ohio with a team of investors in a proxy fight over national rubber machinery, a small Akron tool company. It was Bill's first real work since leaving town's hospital the previous December, and he wanted desperately to succeed. Should the takeover be successful, Bill was promised the presidency of the company.

It soon became clear there were not enough proxy votes for the takeover to be successful, and his partners left Bill behind to fight on alone. Stranded. He was left with just a few dollars in his pocket. Faced with this business failure and only five months sober, Bill felt his recovery was on shaky ground.

Alone. Now, in the hotel, I paced up and down the lobby. There was a bar at one end, a church directory at the other. I would look into the bar where it being Saturday afternoon, the local boys and girls were beginning to get an edge on. Then I would wander out and look absently at the church directory, listing the services to be held. The next day into the bar. I finally wander with a vague idea that I'd buy a bottle of ginger ale. Maybe I could scrape up an interesting acquaintance.

Suddenly, I got scared to death. I realized this was the beginning of the usual rationalizing ation which led me to the first drink, still walking back and forth between bar and church directory. My panic increased. The pull of the bar became terrific. I was really tempted. This time, but still I could think straight. What should I do? Then I suddenly realized how much helping other alcoholics had helped me, even though none had

gotten well themselves. I have to find an alcoholic in Akron and find him quick. It was not only Bill Wilson's sobriety on the line, but all of AIDS. No one can know what might have happened if Bill had gone for. The bar. Instead of the telephone. In this moment, the phone call led to several others and eventually to the man credited as being the co-founder of AA, Dr. Bob Smith. This experience solidified Bill's opinion that we're all else fails. Working with another alcoholic was the key to

sobriety. Throughout the writing of the big book, Bill uses his skills as a salesman to sell the tenants of the book. Bill presents his information. Bill's argument to successfully sell his conclusions to the. Reader. And then closes the deal. the chapter. Working with others presents the clearest. Example of the sales approach going so far as to talk about an alcoholic somebody might work with as a prospect when working with another alcoholic. Bill suggests the following steps. First.

Get to know your prospect by finding out all you can about him. You can do this by talking to the prospect's wife to get an idea of his behavior, his problems, his background, the seriousness of his conditions and his religious bearings. As a sales tactic, this is knowing all you can about your prospect before you arrive next to qualify the prospect. Bill advises to, quote, Wait till he goes on a binge and wait for the end of. The spree. Or at least a lucid interval,

end quote. If the individual is interested in getting sober, his family should mention they know someone who has solved his own problem with alcohol and who tries to help others. Bill suggests starting with the willing person who admits an openness to change. If the alcoholic is unwilling and Bill suggests leaving the big book with him, a sort of leaving. Some promotional materials for the product, perhaps the prospect. Might read the book and understand his problem and the

proposed solution. Bill makes the warning not to. Approach the prospect through his. Family, but. Through a professional referral. Such as a doctor. He encourages hospitalization and if necessary, and says then once he is a patient quote, Let the doctor tell him he has something new in the way of a solution, end quote. And quote When your man is better, let the doctor suggest a visitation from you, end quote.

Doctors today would be well aware of AA, but consider that Bill was writing this in 1938, when there were only a handful of AA groups in the United States, and the name Alcoholics Anonymous had not even been finalized. Bill was considering the Bill W movement as the title for this group. At this point, Bill was casually assuming that. He'd have a working. Relationship with at least Towns Hospital and Dr. Selke were. The heart of this chapter is a step by step guide on how to. Approach.

And sell the new man on sobriety. The first. Meeting with the new man is important because if it fails, there is no. Further contact. Bill's approach takes Dr. Self-worth. Feedback to heart. Stop being a religious zealot at. First. And talk about your own path. To recovery. Bill suggests gaining the drinkers confidence by having a general conversation and then turn the talk over to how you. Drink your. Experiences and label yourself

an alcoholic. Give the prospect how you struggled and what made you stop with the groundwork laid. Bill states that now is the time to explain, quote, The mental twist that leads to. The first drink and. Quote has the root cause. Bill says, quote, If he is an alcoholic, he will understand you at once. End quote. Bill cautions, labeling the new man an alcoholic. He should draw his own conclusions. If the prospect thinks he can still control his drinking, let him know he might

be able to. If he is not truly an alcoholic. But if the man is severely afflicted, there is little chance. To recover. Alone. Bill's ideal outcome is capturing the prospect's attention so completely that he begins to ask you for more information. If your prospect does not than Bill suggests, quote, proceeding with. The rest of your story. End quote. At this point, Bill suggests introducing the idea of God and doing so head on regardless of the man's belief.

Bill stresses sharing the idea of a power greater than you and not theological terms to the agnostic. He encourages telling the new man that they. Have a higher power of. Their conception. If the new man does not belong to a religious denomination. Bill suggests caution here to the prospect may know more about God than you do. Bill then segways into. The program. Of action and suggests being specific. Bill says it's time to tell the new man, quote, how you made. A self appraisal.

How you straighten out your past, and why you are now endeavoring to be helpful to him, end quote. Bill cautions that the new man might balk at this idea. Bill writes, quote, Your candidate may give reasons why he need not follow all your program, end quote. Bill recommends telling the new man you once felt that way, but doubt you'd make progress without the action recommended at the very least. Bill writes, quote, Maybe you have disturbed him about the question of alcohol. That is all

to the good. The more hopeless he feels. The better he. Is more likely to follow your suggestions. End quote. Bill mentions, quote, You'll be most successful with alcoholics if you do not exhibit any passion for. Crusade. Or reform, end quote, for today's audience. That term may seem like talking too much about God, but in 1938, it meant something totally different. It would have clearly been understood. To the reader at the time as a reference to the temperance. And prohibition movements that

dominated society. The previous 70. Years. At the time, Bill was writing the big book, Prohibition had ended. Five years prior. This is a path that Bill Wilson said would never. Work. With a prospect and should be avoided. The best and most proven way. To present. Your position is to tell your story in. Terms. O. What is worked for you.Bill encourages the reader not to be discouraged. If this plan does not work. With the.

Prospect immediately. If the prospect is only interested in someone cleaning up his messes, drop him until he serious. If the prospect does not respond to your message, drop him too and move on to another alcoholic and try again. Bill states It's a waste of time and poor strategy to keep chasing someone who can't or. Won't work with. You. Bill has more caution for the reader. He says that if the man is ready, there are still other pitfalls.

Bill says that the new man may need help getting a job, may need financial assistance and even a home. Bill stresses discretion here based on his. Own personal experience. It may mean the loss of many nights sleep, great interference with your pleasures, interruptions to your business. It may mean sharing your money and your home counseling, frantic wives and relatives, innumerable trips to police, courts, sanitariums, hospitals, jails and asylums. Your telephone may jangle at any time

of the day or night. Your wife will sometimes say she is neglected. A drunk may smash the furniture in your home or burn a mattress. You may have to fight with him if he is violent. Sometimes you will have to call a doctor and administer sedatives under his direction. Another time you may have to send for the police or an ambulance. Bill cautions vigilance and care because this could also trip up

the prospect. Bill says that people do not stop drinking so long as they place their dependence on people rather than God. And your help may cause you to be the one the prospect is dependent upon. Bill talks about how domestic issues almost always plague the newcomer, and they are the price the prospect pays for his years of family neglect. The arguments are understandable. They have to be avoided. Instead, the new man must, quote, concentrate on his own spiritual demonstration, end

quote. And with any luck, his family will see the changes. But if this does not happen, the new man in recovery has to understand that his recovery is not based on people. It's based on a relationship with God. Concluding the chapter bill shifts gears off the new man and the right way of delivering the message of sobriety and talks about how the new member of AA who is carrying the message, can do all of the wonderful things he is now free to do because he himself has had a spiritual awakening.

Assuming we are spiritually fit, we can do all sorts of things alcoholics are not supposed to do. People have said we must not go where liquor is served. We must not have it in our houses. We must shun friends who drink. We must avoid moving pictures which show drinking scenes. We mustn't go into bars. Our friends must hide their bottles if we go to their houses. We mustn't think or be reminded about alcohol at all. Experience proves this nonsense. The alcohol. It can't get any

better in isolation. They must co-exist in the real world where alcohol is present. If the new man can't, then he still has an alcoholic mind and there are issues with his spiritual condition. The rule is not to avoid a place of drinking. So long as we have a legitimate reason to be there. This may seem concerning to a modern member of Alcoholics Anonymous, where the belief is that alcohol should be avoided as much as

possible. The modern reader could also view Bill as having a cavalier attitude with the newcomer's sobriety. Why would Bill talk about proximity to alcohol this way? It's worth remembering the Times. The big book was written just after the end of Prohibition and the reader had memories of the temperance movement. Bill is trying to separate the beliefs and practices of Alcoholics Anonymous from the public's view on the temperance and

prohibition movement. Though Bill does not spell it out, he assumes the reader in 1938 would make the connection. Most importantly, Bill is making the point that the problem is not in a bar, a bottle or the alcohol itself. It's deep within the alcoholic. Bill wants the reader to look within himself and rely on God's help, which is the solution to the drinkers problem.

After all, our troubles were of our own making. Bottles were only a symbol. Besides, we have stopped fighting anybody and anything we have to. Chapter seven.

Working with others practical experience. Shows that nothing will so much ensure immunity from drinking as. Intensive work with other alcoholics. It works when other activities fail. This is our 12th suggestion. Carry this message to other alcoholics. You can help when no one else can. You can secure their confidence. When others fail. Remember, they are very ill. Life will take on new meaning to watch people recover. To see them help others. To watch loneliness vanish. To see a fellowship.

Grow up. About you. To have a host of friends. This is. An experience. You must not miss. We know you will not want to miss it. Frequent contact with. Newcomers and with each other is the bright spot of our lives. Perhaps you are not acquainted with any drinkers who want to recover. You can easily fine some by asking a few. Doctors, ministers, priests or hospitals. They will only be too glad to assist you. Don't start out as an. Evangelist or reformer. Unfortunately, a lot of prejudice exists.

You will be handicapped. If you arouse. It. Ministers and doctors are competent and you can learn much. From them if you wish. But it happens that because. Of your own drinking. Experience, you can be uniquely useful to other alcoholics. So cooperate, never criticise. To be helpful is our only aim. When you discover. A prospect for Alcoholics. Anonymous, find out all you can about him. If it is not, want to stop drinking? Don't waste time trying to persuade him. You may spoil. A later.

Opportunity. This advice is given for his family. Also, they should be patient. Realising they are dealing with a sick person. If there is. Any indication that he wants to stop, have a good. Talk with the person. Most interested in him. Usually his wife get an idea of his behaviour. His problems. His. Background, the seriousness. Of his condition And his religious. Leanings. You need this information to put yourself in his place to see how you would like him to approach you if the

tables were turned. Somet it is wise to wait till he goes on a binge. The family may object to this, but unless is in a. Dangerous. Physical condition. I is better to risk it. Don't deal with him if he is. Very drunk. Unless he is ugly in the family. Needs your help. Wait for the end of the. Spree, o at least for a lucid interval. Then let his. Family or a friend. Ask him if he wants. To quit for good. And if he would go to. Any extreme to do. So. If he says yes, then his attention.

Should be drawn. To you. As a person who has recovered. You should be described. To him as one of a fellowship who. Is part of their own recovery. Try to help others. And who will be glad to talk to him if he cares to see you. If he does not want to see you. Never force yourself. Upon him. Neither should the family. Hysterically plead. With him to do anything. N should they tell him much about you. They should wait for the end. Of his next drinking. Bout. You might place this book. Where he.

Can see it in the. Interval. Here no specific rule can. Be given. The family must decide these things. But urge. Them not. To be overanxious. For that might spoil. Matters. Usually the family should. Not try to tell your story. When possible. Avoid meeting. A man through his. Family. Approach through a doctor or an. Institution is a better. Bet. If your man needs hospitalisation, he should have it. But not forcibly. Unless he is violent. Let the. Doctor if.

He will tell them he has something in the way of a solution. When your man is better, the doctor might. Suggest a visit from you though you have talked with the family. Leave them out. Of the first. Discussion. Under these. Conditions your prospect. Will see he. Is under no pressure. He will feel he can deal with you without being nagged by his family, calling him while he. Is still jittery. He may be more receptive when depressed. See your man. Alone, if possible. At first. Engage in a general.

Conversation after a while. Turn your talk. To some phase of drinking. Tell them enough. About your drinking. Habits, symptoms and. Experiences to encourage him. To speak of himself. If he wishes to talk, let him do so. You will thus get a. Better idea. Of how you ought to proceed. If he is not communicative, give him a sketch. Of your drinking career up. To the time you quit, but say nothing for the moment of how that was accomplished. If he is in. A serious mood.

Dwell on the troubles liquor has caused you, being careful not to moralize or lecture. If his mood is light, tell him. Humorous stories of your escapades. Get him to tell some of his when he sees you know all about the drinking game. Commence to describe yourself. As an alcoholic. Tell him how baffled you were. How you finally. Learned that you were sick. Give him an account of the struggles you made to stop. Show him the mental twist which leads. To the first drink of a spree.

We suggest you do this as we have done in. The chapter on. Alcoholism. If he is an alcoholic, he will understand you at once. He will match your mental inconsistencies with some of his own. If you are. Satisfied he. Is a real. Alcoholic. Begin to dwell on the hopelessness feature of the malady. Show him from your own experience how the queer mental condition surrounded that first drink prevents. Normal functioning. of the willpower. Don't at the. Stage refer to this.

Book unless he has seen it and wishes to discuss it. And be careful not to brand. Him as an alcoholic. Let him draw his own conclusions. If he sticks to the idea that he can still. Control his drinking. Tell him that possibly he can.If he is not too alcoholic, but insists that if he. Is severely. Afflicted, there may be little chance he. Can recover. By himself. Continue to speak of alcoholism as an illness, a fatal malady. Talk about the conditions of body and mind

which accompany it. Keep his attention focused mainly on. Your personal experience. Explain that. Many are doomed. Who never realise their predicament. Doctors are rightly. Loathed to tell alcoholic patients the whole. Story. Unless it will. Serve. Some good. Purpose. But you may talk to him about the hopelessness of alcoholism because you. Offer a. Solution. You will soon. Have your friend. Admitting he has many, if not all, of the traits of the alcoholic. If his. Doctor is.

Willing to tell him that he is alcoholic, so much. The better. Even though your protegé. May not have. Entirely admitted. His condition, he has become. Very curious to. Know how you got. Well, let him ask you that question, if you will tell him exactly what happened to you. Stress the spiritual feature freely. If the man be agnostic or atheist, make it emphatic that he does not have to. Agree with your. Conception of God. He can choose any conception he likes, pr it

makes sense to him. The main thing is that he be willing to believe in a. Power greater than. Himself and that he live. By spiritual principles. When dealing. With such a person. You had better use everyday language. To. Describe spiritual principles. There is no use arousing any prejudice. He may have. Against certain theological terms. And conceptions about which he may already be confused. Don't raise. Such issues.

No matter what your own convictions are, your prospect may belong to a religious denomination. His religious education and training may be far superior to yours. In that case, he's going. To wonder how. You can add anything to. What he already knows. But he will be curious to learn why. His own convictions have. Not worked and why yours seem to work. So well. He may be an example. Of the truth that. Faith alone is insufficient to be vital. Faith must be accompanied by. Self-sacrifice.

And unselfish, constructive action. Let him see. That you are not there to instruct him in religion. Admit that. He probably knows more about. It than you do. But call to his attention the fact. That however deep his. Faith and knowledge, he could not have applied it. Or he would not drink. Perhaps your story. Will help him see. Where he has failed to practice the very precepts. He knows so well. We represent no particular faith or denomination. We are dealing only with general principles.

Common to most denominations. Outline the programme of action. Explaining how you made a self appraisal. How you straighten out your past. And why. You are. Now. Endeavouring to. Be helpful to him. It is. Important for him to realise that your. Attempt to pass this on to him plays a. Vital part in your own recovery. Actually, he may be helping you more than you're helping him.

Make it plain. He is under no obligation to you that you only hope that he will try to help other alcoholics when he escapes his own difficulties. Suggest how. Important it is. That he place the welfare. Of other people. Ahead of his own. Make it clear that he is not under pressure. That he can eat and see you again if he doesn't want to. You should not be offended if he wants. To call it off, for. He has helped you. More.

Than you have helped him. If your talk has been sane, quiet, and full of human understanding. You have perhaps made a friend. Perhaps you have disturbed him. About the question of alcoholism. This is all to the good. The more hopeless he feels, the better he will be more likely. To follow. Your suggestions. Your candidate may give reasons why he need not follow all of the program. He may rebel at the thought of a drastic housecleaning which requires discussion with other people. Do

not contradict such views. Tell him you once felt as he does, but you doubt whether you would have made much progress had you not taken action on your first visit. Tell him about the Fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous. If he shows interest, lend him a copy of this book. Unless your friend wants to talk further about himself. You do not wear out your welcome. Give him a chance to think it over. If you do stay, let him steer the conversation in any

direction he likes. Sometimes a new man is anxious to proceed at once, and you may be tempted to let him do so. This is sometimes a mistake. If he has troubles later, he is likely to say you rushed him. You will be most successful with alcoholics if you do not exhibit any passion or crusade or reform. Never talk down to an alcoholic from any moral or spiritual hilltop. Simply lay out the kit of spiritual tools for his inspection. Show him how they worked for you. Offer him

friendship and fellowship. Tell him that if he wants to get well, you will do anything to help. If he is not interested in your solution, if he expects you to act only as a banker for his financial difficulties or a nurse for his sprees, you may have to drop him until he changes his mind. this him do after he gets hurt some more. If he is sincerely interested and wants to see you again. Ask him to read. This book in the interval. And after doing that, he may. Decide for himself whether.

He wants to go on. He should not be pushed. Or prodded. By you, his wife. Or his friends. If he is to find God, the. Desire must come from. Within. If he thinks he can do the job in. Some other way or prefer some other spiritual approach, encourage. Him to follow his own conscience. We have no monopoly on God. We merely have an approach that worked with us. The point out that we alcoholics have much in common and that you would like in any case, to be friendly. Let it go with that.

Do not be discouraged if you prospect. Does. Not respond. At once. Search out another. Alcoholic and try again. You are sure to. Find someone desperate enough to accept. With eagerness what you offer. We find it a waste of time to keep chasing a man who cannot or will. Not work with. You. If you leave. Such a person. Alo, he may soon become convinced that he can not recover by himself. To spend too much time on any one situation is to deny some. Other alcoholic an opportunity.

To live and be happy. One of our fellowship. Failed. Entirely with his first half dozen prospects. He often says that if he had continued. To work in them. He might. Have deprived many others. Who have. Since recovered. Of their chance. Suppose you are now making your second visit to a man. He has read this volume and says he. Is prepared to go through. With the 12 steps. Of the program of recovery. Having had. The experience. Himself. You can give him much practical advice. Let him know.

That you were. Available if he wishes to make a decision and tell his story. But do not insist upon it if. He prefers to. Consult someone else. He may. Be broke. And homeless. If he is, you might try to help him about getting a job or give them a little financial assistance. But you should. Not deprive your family or creditors of money. They should have. Perhaps you will want to take the man into. Your home for a few. Days, but be sure you use discretion. Be certain you will be.

Welcomed by your family. And that he is not trying to impose upon you for money, connect. Or shelter permit that and you will only harm him. You will be making it. Possible for him. To be insincere. You may be aiding in his destruction. Rather than his recovery. Never avoid these. Responsibilities, but. Be sure you're doing the right. Thing if you assume them helping others is the foundation stone. Of your recovery. A kindly ask once in a while isn't enough. You have to act the Good Samaritan.

Every. Day if need be. It may mean the loss of many nights sleep. Great interference with your pleasures, interruptions to your business. It may mean sharing your money and your home. Counseling, frantic. Wives and relatives, innumerable trips to police, courts. Sanitariums. Hospitals, jails and asylums. Your telephone. May jangle at any time of the. Day or. Night. Your wife may sometimes say she is neglected. A drunk may smash. The furniture in your home or burn a mattress.

You may have to fight with him if he is violent. Sometimes you will have to call. A doctor and administer. Sedatives under his. Direction. Another time you may have to send for the police or an ambulance. Occasionally, you will have to meet such conditions. We seldom allow an alcoholic. To live in our homes for long. At a time. It is. Not good for him. And it. Sometimes creates serious. complications in a family. Though an alcoholic does not respond. There is no reason.

Wh you should neglect his family. You should continue. To be friendly to. Them. The family should be. Offered your way. Of life, should they accept. And practice spiritual principles. There is a much better. Chance that the head of the. Family will recover. And even though he continues. To drink, the. Family will find life. More bearable. For the type of alcoholic who is able and willing to get well. Little charity in the ordinary sense of the word is. Needed or wanted.

The men who cry for money and shelter before conquering. Alcohol. Are on the wrong track. Yet we do not go. To great extremes to provide each other. With these very things. When such action is warranted. This may seem inconsistent, but we think it is not. It is not the. Matter of. Giving that is in question. But when and how to give. That often makes the. Difference. Between. Failure and. Success. The minute we. Put our work on a service. Plane , The alcoholic commences.

To rely upon our assistance rather than. Upon God. He clamors for this or that. Claiming he cannot master alcohol until his. Material needs are cared for. Nonsense. Some of us have. Taken very hard knocks to learn this truth. Job or no. Job? Wife or no wife. We simply do not stop drinking so long as we place dependence upon other people ahead of dependence on God. Burn the idea into the conscience of every man that he can get well, rega of anyone.

The only condition is that he trust in God and clean house. Now the domestic problem. There may be divorce, separation or just strained. Relations. When your prospect. Has made such. Reparation. As he can to his family. And has thoroughly. Explained to them. The new principles. By which he is living. He should. Proceed. To put. Those principles. Into action at home. That is, if he is lucky enough to have a home though his family be at fault. In many respects. He should not be. Concerned.

About that. He should concentrate on his own. Spiritual. Demonstration. Argument and fault finding are to be avoided like the plague in many homes. This is a difficult thing to do, but it must be done if. Any results are to be. Expected. If persisted in for a few months. The effect on a man's family. Is sure to be great. The most incompatible people will discover that they have a basis upon which they can meet. Little by little, the family may see their own defects and admit

them. These can then be discuss in an atmosphere. Of. Helpfulness. And friendliness. After they have seen. Tangible results, the. Family. Will perhaps want. To go along. These things will come to. Pass naturally. And in good. Time, provided. However, the alcoholic continues to demonstrate that he can be. Sober. Considerate. And helpful regardless. Of what anyone says or does. Of course, we all fall much below the standard many times. But we must try to repair the.

Damage immediately, lest we pay the penalty by a. Spree. If there be divorce or separation. There should be no undue haste. For the couple. To get together. The man should be. Sure of his recovery. The wife should fully understand his new way of life. If their old relationship. Is. To be. Resumed, it must be on a better basis since. The former did not work. This means a new attitude. In spirit all around. Sometimes it is to the best interest of all. Concern that a couple remain apart.

Obviously, no rule can be laid down. Let the alcoholic continue his. Program. Day by day. When the time for living. Together has come. It will be. Apparent to both parties. But no alcoholics say he. Cannot recover. Unless he has his family back. This just isn't so. In some cases, the wife will. Never come back for one reason or another. Remind the prospect that his recovery. Is not dependent upon people. It is dependent. Upon the.

Relationship with God. We have seen men get well whose families have not. Returned at all. We have seen others slip when the family came back too soon. Both you and the new man must walk day by day in the path. Of spiritual progress. If you persist, remarkable. Things will happen. When we look back, we realize that the things which came to us when we put ourselves in God's hands. Were better. Than anything we could have planned. Follow the dictates of a. Higher power.

And you will presently live in a new. And wonderful world, no matter what your present circumstances. When working. With a man and his family, you should. Take care not to participate in their quarrels. You may spoil your chance of being helpful if you do. But urge. Upon a man's family that he has been. A very sick person. And should. Be treated. Accordingly. You should warn against arousing resentment or jealousy. You should point out that his defects.

Of character are not going to disappear overnight. Show them that he has entered. Upon a period of growth. Ask them to. Remember. And they are. Impatient. The blessed fact. Of his sobriety. If you have been successful in solving. Your. Own domestic problems, tell the. Newcomers family. How that was accomplished. In this way. You can set them on the right track without. Becoming critical of. Them. The story. Of how you and. Your wife. Settled your difficulties. Is worth any amount of criticism.

Assuming we are. Spiritually. Fit, we can do all. Sorts of. Things alcoholics are not supposed to do. People have said we must not. Go near where liquor is served. We must not have it in our homes. We must shun. Friends who drink. We must avoid moving. Pictures which show drinking. Scenes. We must not go into bars. Our friends must hide their. Bottles if we go to their houses. We mustn't think or be reminded about alcohol in any way. O experience shows. That this is not necessarily so.

We meet these conditions every day. An alcoholic who cannot meet them still has an alcoholic mind. There is something the. Matter with his spiritual. Status is only. Chance for sobriety. Would be some place like the. Greenland. Ice cap. And even there an Eskimo. Might turn. Up with a bottle of scotch and ruin everything. Ask any woman who has sent. Her husband. To different places on the. Theory. He would escape the alcohol

problem. In our belief, any scheme of combating alcoholism which proposes to shield the sick man from temptation is doomed to failure. If the alcoholic tries to shield himself, he may succeed. For a. Time, but he usually winds up. With a bigger. Explosion than. Ever. We have tried these methods. These attempts to do the impossible have always failed. So a rule is. Not to avoid a. Place where there is drinking. If we have a legitimate reason for being there, that includes.

Bars. Nightclubs, dances, receptions, weddings and even plain old whippy parties. To a person who has had experience. With an alcoholic. This may seem like tempting providence, but it isn't. You will know that we made an important qualification. Therefore, you. Ask yourself on each occasion, Have I any good social business or. Personal. Reason going to this place? Or am I expecting to steal a little victory. Ass pleasure. From the atmosphere of such places? if you answer those questions.

Satisfactorily. You need have no apprehension. Go or stay away. Whatever seems. Best. But be. Sure you are on solid spiritual ground before you start and that your motive. Going in is thoroughly good. Do not think of what you will get out of the occasion. Think of what you. Can bring to it. But if you're shaky. You had. Better work with another. Alcohol instead. Why sit with a long face in places where. There is drinking. Sighing about the good old days? If it is a happy occasion, try to.

Increase the pleasure of those there. If a business occasion, go and attend to your business enthusiast, Stickley. If you are with a person who. Wants to eat in a bar. By all means, go along. Let your friends know. They are not to change their habits on your account at a proper time. And place. Explain to all. Your friends. Why alcohol. Disagrees. With you. If you can do this thoroughly, few people will ask you to drink. While you are drinking. You were withdrawing from.

Life little by little. Now you are getting back into the social life of this world. Don't start to withdraw again just because your friends drink liquor. Your job now is to be at the place where you may be of maximum helpfulness to others. So never hesitate to go anywhere. If you can be helpful. You should not hesitate to visit the most. Sordid spot on earth. On such. An errand. Keep on the. Firing. Line of life with these motives, and God will keep you unharmed. Many of us keep.

Liquor in our homes. We often need it. To carry green recruits through a severe hangover. Some of us still. Serve it to our friends, provided they are not. Alcoholic. But some of us think we should. Not serve. Liquor to anyone. We never argue this question. We feel that each family, in the light. Of their own. Circumstances, ought to decide for themselves. We are careful never to show intolerance or hatred of drinking. As an institution. Experience shows that such an attitude is

not helpful to anyone. every new alcoholic looks for. The spirit among. Us and is immensely relieved when he finds we. Are not which burners. A spirit of intolerance might repel. Alcoholics whose lives could have been saved had it not. Been for such. Stupidity. We would not even do the cause. Of temperate drinking. Any good. For not one drinker. In a thousand likes to be told anything about alcohol by one who hates it. Someday, we hope Alcoholics Anonymous will help the public to.

Better realization. Of the gravity of the alcoholic problem. But we shall be of little use if our attitude is one of bitterness. Or. Hostility. Drinkers will not stand for it. After all, our problems were of our own making. Bottles were only a symbol. Besides, we have stopped fighting anybody or anything. We have to.