Decoding the Big Book - More About Alcoholism

In more about alcoholism, ill presents, three real life stories and one striking analogy hoping that one of these will grab the reader's attention in a way that a simple statement of fact could not. But before introducing these stories, Bill emphasizes that being powerless over the first drink is a permanent condition. He wanted to make it clear that once powerless drinking alcohol will always be a dangerous activity.

To illustrate this point, Bill tells the story of a man who quit drinking at 30 and stayed sober for 25 years until he thought he had the willpower to drink again. Bill Shamberg tells the story of this man and his eventual failure.

dying of drink. Just four years later, alcohol kills him within four years later.

He asks what mental states precede a relapse into drinking and tells the story of Jim, a sober car salesman who thought he could drink mixed with milk and a sandwich using an absurd analogy of a jaywalker. Bill shows how insane Jim's thinking was. Bill Cherbourg tells more about Jim's story.

the rails. Suddenly, Jim said, the thought crossed my mind that if I were to put an ounce of whiskey in my milk, it couldn't hurt me on a full stomach. Disaster, of course, followed, and Jim ended up making one more trip to the asylum. Wilson follows the story by noting that Jim had much knowledge of himself as an alcoholic so that your self-knowledge, your struggle is not the key or the solution. And yet he succumbed.

Although he had all this knowledge, he succumbed to the foolish idea that he could take whiskey, if only he mixed it with milk. Bill says behavior like this. Well, we can only we can only call this what plain insanity? Plain insanity. The insanity of picking up the first

step. He says, If you're a real alcoholic, there will always be the same kind of curious mental phenomenon where some insanely trivial excuse will win out over sound reasoning and the insanely Christian idea triumphs, and alcoholics deliberately begin to drink together.

first drink. And in this story, the man continues to jaywalk despite the increasingly horrible consequences of his passion for jaywalking. At first, he's just slightly injured. Then he ends up with a fractured skull, a high decides to stop, but in a few weeks he doesn't stop and he breaks both his legs. And things have gotten so bad, his wife divorces John and his friends and everybody knows him as ridiculing honor. And he can't stop. We just can't stop.

He just like, just can't and just ends up ends up jaywalking all the time. So he checks himself in an asylum to get some professional help. But the day he gets out of the asylum, bang jumps in front of a trolley and it breaks his back. Such a man, Wilson says, would be crazy, wouldn't it? Crazy.

and had one. I can remember having several more that night. Shocking. And pretty next morning. I have a shadowy recollection of being in an airplane bound for New York and on finding a currently taxicab driver at the landing field instead of my wife. The driver escorting me for several days. I know little of where I went or what I said and did. Then came the hospital with the unbearable mental and physical suffering. My alcoholic friends had prophesied that I would drink

again. They had said that though I did raise the defense. Self-knowledge. Defense? It would one day give way before some trivial reason for having a drink. I knew from that moment that willpower and self-knowledge would not help in those strange mental blank spots.

drink. The quote shows that the alcoholics defense must come from a higher power and that this illustrates the build of the big book. Which one chapter builds on another. And in the next chapter, Bill has a much fuller discussion on the belief in God through his stories and analogies. Bill Wilson shows that alcoholism is a permanent condition that requires a spiritual solution. He emphasizes that willpower and self-knowledge alone cannot stop an alcoholic from taking the

first drink. He explains the mindset of the alcoholic before they take the first drink and how they are powerless over it. Bill uses examples of real life situations to help the reader identify and evaluate their own condition and emphasizes that the alcoholics defense must come from a higher power. This chapter is a crucial part of the big book, which offers a comprehensive program for recovery from alcoholism.

Chapter three More About alcoholism. Most of us have been unwilling to admit we were real alcoholics. No person likes to think he is bodily and mentally different from his fellows. Therefore, it is not surprising that her drinking careers have been categorized by countless vain attempts to prove we could drink like other people. The idea that somehow someday he will control and enjoy his drinking is the great obsession of every abnormal drinker. The persistence of this delusion is

astonishing. Many pursue it to the gates of insanity or death. We learned that we had to fully concede to our innermost selves that we were alcoholics. This is the first step in recovery. The delusion that we are like other people or presently maybe has to be smashed. We alcoholics are men and women who have lost the ability to control our drinking. We know that no real alcoholic ever recovers control. All of us felt at times that we were

regaining control. But such intervals, usually brief, were inevitably followed by still less control, which led in time to pitiful and in comprehend sizeable demoralization. We are convinced to a man that alcohol locks of our type are in the grips of a progressive illness over any considerable period. We get worse, never better. We are like men who have lost their legs. They never grow new ones. Neither does there appear to be any kind of treatment which will make alcoholics of our kind like

other men. We have tried every imaginable remedy. In some instances, there has been brief recovery, followed always by a still worse relapse. Physicians who are familiar with alcoholism agree there is no such thing as making a normal drinker out of an alcoholic. Science may one day accomplish this, but it hasn't done so yet. Despite all we can say, many who are real alcoholics are not going to believe that they are in that class by every form of self-deception and

experimentation. They will try to prove themselves exceptions to the rule. Therefore, non alcoholic. If anyone who is showing inability to control his drinking can do the right about face and drink like a gentleman. Our hats are off to him. Heaven knows we've tried hard enough and long enough to drink like other people. Here are some methods. We've tried drinking

beer, only limiting the number of drinks. Never drinking alone. Never drinking in the morning. Drinking only at home. Never having it in the house. Never drinking during business hours. Drinking only at parties. Switching from scotch to brandy. Drinking only natural wines. Agreeing to resign if ever. Drunk on the job. Taking a trip? Not taking a trip. Swearing off forever. And With or without a solemn oath. Taking more

physical exercise. Reading. Inspirational books. Going to health farms in sanitariums. Accepting voluntary commitment to asylums. We could increase the list ad infinitum. We do not like to pronounce any individual as alcoholic. But you can quickly diagnose yourself. Step over to the nearest bathroom and try some controlled drinking. Try to drink and stop abruptly. Try it more than once. It will not take long for you to decide if you are honest with yourself about it. It may be worth a bad

case of jitters. If you get a full knowledge of your condition. There is no way of proving it. We believe that early in our drinking careers, most of us could have stopped. But the difficulty is that few alcoholics have the desire to stop while there is yet time. We have heard of a few instances where people who showed definite signs of alcoholism were able to stop for a long period because of an overpowering desire to do so. Here is one. A man of 30 was doing a great deal of spree

drinking. He was very nervous in the morning after these bouts and quieted himself with more liquor. He was ambitious to succeed in business, but he saw he would get nowhere if he drank at all. Once he started, he had no control. Whatever. He made up his mind that until he had been successful in business and had retired, he would not touch another drum. An exceptional man. He remained bone dry for 25 years and retired at the age of 55 after a successful and happy

business career. Then he fell victim to the belief, which practically every alcoholic has, that his long period of sobriety and self-discipline had qualified him to drink as other men. out, came his carpet slippers and a bottle. In two months, he was in a hospital. Puzzled and humiliated. He tried to regulate his drinking for a while,making several trips to

the hospital. Meantime than gathering all his forces, he attempted to stop all together and found he could not every means of solving his problem which money could buy was at his disposal. Every attempt failed. though a robust man at retirement. He went to pieces quickly and was dead within four years. This case contains a powerful lesson. Most of us have believed that if we remained sober for a long stretch, we could thereafter drink normally. But here is a man who had 55

years found. He was just where he had left off at 30. We have seen the truth demonstrated. Again and again. Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic, commencing to drink after a period of sobriety. We are in a short time as bad as ever. If we are planning to drink again, there must be no reservation of any kind, nor any lurking notion that someday we will be immune to alcohol. Young people may be encouraged by this man's experience to think that they can stop as he did on their own

willpower. We doubt if many of them can do it because none really want to stop. And hardly one of them because of the peculiar mental twist already acquired, will find he can win out. Several of our crowd. Men of 30 or less had been drinking only a few years, but they found themselves as helpless as those who had been drinking 20 years to be gravely affected. One does not necessarily have to drink a long time, nor take the quantities some of us have. This is particularly true of women.

Potential female alcoholics often turn into the real thing and are gone beyond recall in a few years. Certain drinkers who would be greatly insulted if called alcoholics are astonished at their inability to stop. We who are familiar with the symptoms, see large numbers of potential alcoholics among young people everywhere. But try and get them to see it. A notation in the book. true when this book was first published. But a 2011 U.S. Canada membership survey showed only 1/13 of A's were 30

and under. As we look back, we feel we had gone on drinking many years beyond the point where we could quit on our own willpower If anyone questions whether he has encountered this dangerous area, let him try leaving liquor alone for one year. If he is a real alcoholic and very far advanced, there is scant chance of success. In the early days of our drinking, we occasionally remained sober for one year or more, becoming serious drinkers later again. though, you may be able to stop

for a considerable period. You may yet be a potential alcoholic. We think for you to whom this book will appeal can stay dry anything like a year. Some will be drunk the day after making the resolutions, most of them within a few weeks. For those who are unable to drink moderately, the question is how

to stop altogether. We are assuming, of course, that the reader desires to stop Whether such a person can quit upon a non spiritual basis depends upon the extent to which he has already lost the power to choose whether he will drink or not. Many of us felt we had plenty of character. There was a tremendous urge to cease forever. We found it impossible. This is the baffling feature of alcoholism as we know it. This utter inability to leave it alone. No matter how great the

necessity or the wish. How, then, shall we help our readers determine to their own satisfaction whether they are one of us? The experiment of quitting for a period of time will be helpful, but we think we can render an even greater service to alcoholic sufferers and perhaps to the medical fraternity. So we shall describe some of the mental states that precede a relapse into drinking. For obviously, this is the crux of the problem. What sort of thinking dominates an alcoholic

who repeats time after time? The desperate experiment of the first drink. Friends who have reasoned with him after a spree which has brought him to the point of divorce or bankruptcy, are mystified when he walks directly into a saloon. Why does he? Of what is he thinking? Our

first example is a friend. We shall call Jim. This man has a charming wife and family. He inherited a lucrative automobile agency. He had a commendable World War record. He is a good salesman. Everybody likes him. He is an intelligent man. Normal, so far as we can see. Except for a nervous disposition. He did no drinking until he was 35. In a few years, he became so violent when intoxicated that he had to be committed. On leaving the asylum, he came into contact

with us. We told him what we knew of alcoholism and the answer we had found. He made a beginning. His family was reassembled and he began to work as a salesman for the business he had lost through drinking. All went well for a time. But he failed to enlarge his spiritual life to his consternation. He found himself drunk half a dozen times in rapid succession. On each of these occasions. We worked with him, reviewing carefully what had happened. He agreed he was a real alcoholic

and in a serious condition. He knew he faced another trip to the asylum if he kept on. Moreover, he would lose his family, fo whom he had a deep affection. Yet he got drunk again. We asked him to tell us exactly how it happened. This is his story. I came to work on Tuesday. I remember I felt irritated that I had to be a salesman for a concern I once owned. I had a few words with the boss, but nothing serious.

Then I decided to drive into the country and see one of my prospects for a car on the way. I felt hungry, so I stopped at a roadside place where they have a bar. I had no intention of drinking. It just thought that I would get a sandwich. I also had a notion I might find a customer for a car at this place, which was familiar for I had been going to it for years. I'd eaten there many times during the months I was sober. I sat down at a table and ordered a sandwich and a glass of milk.

Still no thought of drinking. I ordered another sandwich and decided to have another glass of milk. Suddenly the thought crossed my mind that if I were to put an ounce of whiskey in my milk, it couldn't hurt me on a full stomach. I ordered a whiskey and poured it into the milk. I vaguely sensed I was not being any too smart, but felt reassured as I was taking the whiskey on a full stomach. The experiment went so well. I ordered another whiskey and

poured it into more milk. That didn't seem to bother me, so I tried another. Thus started one more journey to the asylum for Jim. Here was the thread of commitment, the loss of family in position to say nothing of that intense mental and physical suffering which drinking always caused him. He had much knowledge about himself as an alcoholic, yet all reasons for not drinking were easily pushed aside in favor of the foolish idea. He could take whiskey if only he mixed it with milk.

Whatever the precise definition of the word may be, we call this plain insanity. How can such a lack of proportion of the ability to think straight be called anything else? You may think this is an extreme case. To us, it's not far fetched for this kind of thing has been characteristic of every single one of us. We have sometimes reflected more than Jim did upon the consequences. But there was always the curious mental phenomenon that parallel with

our sound reasoning. There inevitably ran some insanely trivial excuse for taking the first drink. Our sound reasoning failed to hold us in check. The insane idea won out. Next day we would ask ourselves in all earnestness and sincerity, how it could have happened. In some circumstances we have gone out deliberately to get drunk, feeling ourselves justified by nervousness, anger, worry, depression, jealousy or the like.

But even in this type of beginning, we are obliged to admit that our justification for a spree was insanely insufficient in the light of what always happen. We now see that when we begin to drink deliberately instead of casually, there was little serious or effective thought during the period of premeditation of what the terrific consequences might be. Our behavior is as absurd

and incomprehensible. With respect to the first drink as that of an individual with a passion for, say, jaywalking. He gets a thrill out of skipping in front of fast moving vehicles. He enjoys himself for a few years in spite of friendly warnings. Up to this point, he would label him as a foolish chap having queer ideas of fun luck. Then Desert Sun and he is slightly injured several times in succession. You would expect him if he were normal to cut it

out. Presently he is hit again and this time he has a fractured skull. Within a week he is leaving the hospital. A fast moving trolley breaks his arm. He tells you he has decided to stop jaywalking for good. But in a few weeks, he breaks both legs. On through the years, his conduct continues, accompanied by his continual promises to be careful or to keep off the streets altogether. Finally, he can no longer work. His wife gets a divorce and he is held up

to ridicule. He tries every known means to get the jaywalking idea out of his head. He shuts himself up in an asylum, hoping to mend his ways. But the day he comes out, he races in front of a fire engine, which breaks his back. Such a man would be crazy, wouldn't he? You may think our illustration is too ridiculous. But isn't we who have been through the wringer have to admit, if we substitute food at alcoholism for jaywalking, the illustration

would fit us exactly. However intelligent we may have been in other respects where alcoholism has been involved, we have been strangely insane. It's strong language. But isn't it true some of you were thinking, Yes, what you tell us is true, but it doesn't fully apply. We admit we have some of these symptoms, but we have not gone to the extremes you fellows did. Nor are we likely to. For we understand ourselves so well. After what you have told us that such

things cannot happen again. We have not lost everything in life. Their drinking and certainly do not intend to. Thanks for the information. That may be true of certain non-alcoholic people who ,though drinking foolishly and heavily at the present time, are able to stop or moderate because their brains and bodies have not been damaged as ARS were. But the actual or potential alcoholic, will be absolutely unable to stop drinking on the

basis of self-knowledge. This is a point we wish to emphasize and reemphasize. To smash home upon our alcoholic readers as it has been revealed to us out of bitter experience. Let us take another illustration. Fred is a partner in a well-known

accounting firm. His income is good. He has a fine home, is happily married, and the father, a promising children of college age. He has so attractive a personality that he makes friends with everyone. If ever there was a successful businessman and it is Fred to all appearance, he is a stable, well-balanced individual. Yet he is alcoholic.We first saw Fred about a year ago in a hospital where he had gone to recover

from a bad case of jitters. It was his first experience of this kind and he was much ashamed of it. Far from admitting he was an alcoholic, he told himself he came to the hospital to rest his nerves. The doctor intimated strongly that he might be worse than he realized. For a few days, he was depressed about his condition. He made up his mind to quit drinking altogether. It never occurred to him that perhaps he could not do so in spite of his character and

standing. Fred would not believe himself an alcoholic, much less accept the spiritual remedy for his problem. We told him what we knew about alcoholism. He was interested and conceded that he had some of the symptoms, but he was a long way from admitting that he could do nothing about it himself. He was positive that this humiliating experience, plus the knowledge he had acquired, would keep him sober for the rest of his life. Self-knowledge would fix it. We heard no more of Fred for a

while. One day we were told that he was back in the hospital. This time he was quite shaky. He soon indicated he was anxious to see us. The story he told us is most instructive for here was a chap absolutely convinced he had to stop drinking, who had no excuse for drinking, who exhibited splendid judgment and determination in all his other concerns, yet was flat on his back. Nevertheless, let him tell

you about it. I was much impressed with what you fellows said about alcoholism, and I frankly did not believe it would be possible for me to drink again. I rather appreciated your ideas about the subtle insanity which precedes the first drink, but I was confident it could not happen to me after what I had learned. I reason I was not so far advanced, as most of you fellows, that I had been usually successful in licking my other personal problems and that I would therefore be successful

were human failed. I felt I had every right to be self-confident. That would only be a matter of exercising my willpower and keeping on my guard. In this frame of mind, I went about my business and for a time all was well. I had no trouble refusing drinks and began to wonder if I had not been making too hard work of a simple matter. One day I went to Washington to present some accounting evidence to a

government bureau. I had been out of town before during this particular dry spell, so there was nothing new about that. Physically, I felt fine. Neither did I have any pressing problems or worries. My business came off well. I was pleased and knew my partners would be too. It was the end of a perfect day. Not a cloud on the horizon. I went to my hotel and leisurely dressed for dinner. As I crossed the threshold of the dining room. The thought came to mind that it would be nice to have a couple

of cocktails with dinner. That was all. Nothing more. I ordered a cocktail and my meal. Then I ordered another cocktail. After dinner, I decided to take a walk. When I returned to the hotel, it struck me. A highball would be fine before going to bed. So I stepped into the bar and had one. I remember having several more that night and plenty the next morning. I have a shadowy recollection of being in an airplane bound for New York and a finding a friendly taxicab driver at the landing field.

Instead of my wife. The driver escorted me about for several days. I knew little of where I went or what I said and did. Then came the hospital with unbearable mental and physical suffering. As soon as I regained my ability to think, I went carefully over that evening in Washington. Not only had I been off guard, I had made no fight. Whatever, ag the first drink. This time I had not thought of the consequences at all. I commenced to drink as careless, o as though the cocktails were

ginger ale. I remembered what my alcoholic friends had told me, how they prophesized that if I had an alcoholic mind the time and place would come. I would drink again. They had said that though I did raise the defense, it would one day give way before some trivial reason for having a drink. Wel, just that did happen and more for what I learned of alcoholism did not occur to me at all. I knew from that moment

that I had an alcoholic mind. I saw that willpower and self-knowledge would not help in those strange mental blind spots. I had never been able to understand people who said that a problem had them hopelessly defeated. I knew then it was a crushing blow. Two members of Alcoholics Anonymous came to see me. They grinned, which I didn't like so much, and then asked me if I thought myself alcoholic and if I were really licked. This time I had to concede both

propositions. They piled on me heaps of evidence to the effect that an alcoholic mentality such as I exhibited in Washington was a hopeless condition. They cited cases out of their own experience by the dozen. This process snuffed out the last flicker of conviction that I could do the job myself. Then they outlined the spiritual answer and program of action, which a hundred of them had followed successfully. Though I had only been a nominal

churchman. Their proposals were not intellectually hard to swallow, but the programme of action, though entirely sensible, was pretty drastic. It meant I would have to throw several lifelong conceptions out the window. That was not easy. But the moment I made up my mind to go through with the process, I had the curious feeling that my alcoholic condition was relieved, as in fact it proved to be quite as important as the discovery that spiritual principles would

solve all my problems. I have since been brought into a way of living infinitely more satisfying and I hope, more useful than the life I lived before. My old manner of life was by no means a bad one. But I would not exchange its best moments for the worst I have now. I would not go back to it even if I could. Fred story speaks for itself. We hope it strikes home to thousands like him. He had felt only the first nip of

the wringer. Most alcoholics have to be pretty badly mangled before they really commence to solve their problems. Many doctors in psychiatry first agree with our conclusions. One of these men, staff member of a world renowned hospital, recently made the statement to some of us, What you say about the general hopelessness of the average alcoholic's plight is,

in my opinion, correct. As the two of you men whose stories I have heard, there is no doubt in my mind that you were 100% hopeless apart from divine help. Had you offered yourself as patients at this hospital, I would have not taken you. If I had been able to avoid it. People like you are too heartbreaking, though. Not a religious person. I have profound respect for the spiritual approach in such cases as yours. For most cases, there is virtually no other solution.

Once more, the alcoholic at certain times has no effective mental defense against the first drink, except in a few rare cases. Neither he nor other human being can provide such a defense. His defense must come from a higher power.