Hey, viewers, Sniffy's Cruising Confessions is an explicit podcast about queer sex, filtered dirty words, and unfiltered descriptions of sexual activities. If hearing about orgies, anonymous sex, kink, fetish, and more offends your sensibilities, you might want to skip this. Viewer discretion is advised. It's definitely not for kids. Hey, Gabe, did you experience any bliging when you grew up?
No, not at all.
I was a perfectly socially adjusted queer child that grew up in a supportive community of Floridians that embraced who I was and helped me come into mind. No.
Yeah, I was heavily bullied.
I think even before you're comfortable with your own sexuality, someone's gonna call you faggot because you do not prescribe to the gender norms of being a little boy.
But how about you, Like you were saying, like the F word and the N word were used very freely with me in elementary school. Yeah, and like I did not know what either of those things were, And so I grew up like you really being a perfect that's an people pleaser sure, and a chameleon right to sort of like mitigate the bullying. Like if I was the smartest in the class and I was the fastest on the track, then like what do you have to make fun of?
And then it's wild we have to go through all of that, and then we get out of high school and then we find other queer people and it's like, oh, we've all been through the same shit. But people shouldn't have to go through like sixteen to eighteen years of misery to like eventually.
Be subsequent therapy.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, all right, so bullying is going to be a very very light theme today, right, Yeah.
Do you think that any of the experience that you had with bullying growing up, do you think that sort of informs some of the things that you do in bed?
I don't think so. I'll explore some submissive play. It's not my preferred thing, but I don't like like rules, orders, insects, and I know for some people that's a kink and it really turns them on. Yeah, but it's like, baby, I grew up Catholic, I grew up perto Rican, I couldn't get a sleepovers. I don't need new rules in my life. Okay, I lived half my life with really
stringent rules. For me, sex is something that's like fun and explore to and so for me, I don't see any connection between that bullying and sex.
But I'm curious, how about you? Absolutely the same? That shit was hard?
Yeah, sex is one of those few times where I feel in my body and fully authentic, and to bring up those moments where I was told that I wasn't able to be who I am and whatever, like, I don't want to bring that into my sex life.
And when I.
Get those type of requests from people, I really like bulk up against it because I'm like, I don't want to inflict that pain on anyone.
You know, today's topic is going to touch a little bit on bullying, but also degradation and humiliation. We do know that queer and trans people grow up experiencing bullying at a far higher rate than that of our peers. Could that be why some of us find ourselves turned on by consensual degradation humiliation when we're older.
In this episode, we get on our knees to explore the.
Increasingly popular fetish practice with the help of a pleasure educator who loves to be bullied in the bedroom.
Then we'll get tips and tricks from an experienced dom and sadist on how to incorporate degradation into your own play in a safe, sane, and consensual way.
Welcome to Sniffy's Cruising Confessions. I am Gabe Gonzale.
I'm Chris Patterson. Rosso Each week weeks more, the Sublind world of queer sex, cruising and relationship will.
Be talking to queer folks of all kinds. Ask them questions, swap sex stories, share intimate revelations.
A lot of us are discovering ourselves in cruising spaces. This happened to me at this toilet stall, in the library or the airport. I feel like everybody's gonna fuck a little harder here. Damn. So I've been like the neighborhood plot, and I took pride in that I was so afraid but yet so intrigued. And the more I gave him, the more he could take.
If you're having sex on Sniffy's, you already have a moral deficit.
Our first guest today is a pleasure educator and freelance writer whose columns on queer sexuality have been published in Playboy, l The Advocate, Them.
And The Daily Beasts. Like Chris and I.
He has a podcast called Bad in Bed that offers queer sex ed to listeners.
Please welcome Bobby Box. Hey Bobby, how are you baby?
Well, we're so happy to have you. Did you experience bullying as a kid.
Oh? Yes, okay, I was, you know, called a fag since I was a kid all the time. I love the spice girls, like you know, that was the thing. Like it was like my friends were girls, you know. And and then as I went to high school, I was like, okay, do you need to survive. You're playing all the sports, you're gonna be dating girls, You're going to be doing everything that you can do to make.
Your life easier right now.
But I still got bullied.
Like I remember even bathroom breaks, being like I'm going to walk down the hall and someone's gonna call me that name, do you know what I mean? And like you prepare for it and you go quiet and you look at the floor while you're walking, and it's you know, it's a sad experience in hindsight. But now that I'm so like proud of who I am, I'm like like fuck that, yeah.
You know what I mean?
Like, yeah, like it's like it makes me out or of who I am now to live out loud.
I think it's obvious how common of it experience this is globally for queer youth. But interestingly, a lot of that language is stuff that I've encountered in community or in sexual scenarios that feels kind of empowering or fun to reclaim. Right, Like, I love using the word fag to describe myself. Yeah, I have had people call me fag in bed, and I've been like, huh, never thought
about it. Okay, sure, Like as long as we're you know, I don't have to role play that hard if that's what you are, like, and then everybody loves that story about like going back home and like finding their bully on grinder and like and like sort of like literally reclaiming the source of this stuff. Yeah, So I'm curious how do you sort of navigate this past trauma and ways of like maybe reclaiming it or giving it a new context.
The word fag in this sexual context took me a very long time to get comfortable with. So my first ever boyfriend that I had, he loved the word. He's been out for years and was like he was very dominant and very like had like you know, he knew what being gay was all about.
I was like the angenu like.
Oh, like you know kind of like yeah, so like it worked for us like that whole like dynamic. But I remember when he used the word fag. I I felt like I went right back to those days in high school.
My heart dropped through my chest.
All arousal was gone, and I was like I had to stop this, you know, this scene you know, quote unquote, but I was like, I can't do with you calling me that, like that's an issue for me. And he was like, oh really, He's like that sucks because like that's one of my favorite words. And that kind of
modeled its way through our entire relationship. But he also was somebody I trusted, you know, and somebody that I loved, and it became something where I actually it has evolved to become one of the words I really really enjoy being called in bed now. So it's like so eventually, and I you know, I think it did come with you know, being fresh out of the closet, not totally comfortable with who I was, to now being like yeah I am, and I'm proud of it, Like you better
know I am. I remember when it happened too, Like I remember being like, oh wait, that word just made you like come, you know what I mean. I was like, that was a word that used to be trauma, and now it's the complete opposite. So it's like I thank him for many things, but one of the things was for just kind of like letting me be a submissive and trusted dominant completely, do you know what I mean?
And now I don't think I could have without a boyfriend type relationship, you know, just to really learn the ropes.
Yeah, I don't think I'm there yet. I think maybe it's part of like being non binary. Like I use the word paget a lot to describe my group of friends, et cetera, and like a social context, but like in a sexual context, I like, I hear the word and I'm like absolutely not yeah, because I do not identify.
No, I really do think it's common, because I did do a post on it. I did two informal polls four years apart, so like just basically on my social accounts, and I in twenty nineteen twenty seven, only twenty seven percent were comfortable being called faggot in the bedroom, where in twenty twenty three, that grew to forty two percent.
Wow.
I don't know if that's that we're becoming more comfortable with it or that like my audience changed, But like, that's an interesting insight.
I think it's But then both yeah.
Right and another and a follow up poll, half of the voters admitted to using the fsler among friends, so, like whether they were comfortable with it sexually or not, half of us use it with our friends as like it's meaningless, it's a term of endearment. Yeah, you know, I just find that such an interesting, you know, insight.
Yeah, I'm curious in the context of sort of dom sub relationships too. How is it something that you started navigating and is it something that you incorporated into your sex life outside of your past relationship.
Yeah.
So you know, like all of us as when we're younger and we're like exploring our sexual selves, we all happen upon a website that changes everything for us period, you know what I mean, Like and you're like, oh, wait, like your eyes widen, your whole widen.
You know, it just happened.
And yeah, mine was yeah.
That too, Yeah, and I I mine was called smoking Hunks.
Dot com smoking hunks.
So I don't know if yeah, so if these men who are smoking and they're like literally like muscular, greased up, and then they're like smoking and they're calling you faggot, they're calling you the worst word, like you know, and they're just talking down to you.
And I was like, oh, this is gonna be a problem for me.
Okay, do you know what I mean?
Like I was like, this is that was the beginning of the end.
And then I found I started dating man that embodied those types. Even when I tried to convince myself I was straight by watching straight porns, I always I always saw myself as like the female because unfortunately, you know, head sexual porn is very one note where like it's often the female being you know, humiliated or degraded or anything like that. So like that's where I saw myself, you know, Like I was like, oh, that's who I want to be in scene, you know.
So so I have to ask, are there any words you don't like?
As much of a submissive as I am, I do think it's important that every submissive has their boundaries and they express that right from the get.
Go, because a good dom also doesn't want.
To cross boundaries.
Yeah, you know, you want both people to be completely comfortable. I think a lot of people think that, like a dominant doesn't care about the other person's needs and that's what makes it hot. And I'm like, not at all, it's the complete opposite. You need one trust in that person as much of like a submissive hoe that I can be. I'm still very sensitive comments about my body, like let's not go there, you know, like I'm a thicker guy. But like I remember the first time I
got called beefy. I just remember in the moment it hitting me, and then your mind's kind of out of that subspace, which is very important for a submissive, and you're like, oh, you kind of off and you tense up, and it's like that's not good. But like, also, they didn't know. I didn't express that to them, so that's not their issue either, do you know what I mean?
They meant it as a compliment.
Yeah, I mean, and I feel like in that situation, it's like you don't know, you don't like it until it happens, you know. And I think that, oh, that's like the whole exploration of that. It's like there are lots of times where I'm in situations and something happens, I'm like, oh, you know what, I actually don't like that. Let's never do that again.
Right, So, baby, I'm curious you'd approach sex from a kind of educational and sometimes academic standpoint, even though your language is very accessible, right, you're like meeting folks that they're at But I'm wondering how how you view the psychology of your own approach to humiliation and degradation and how your thoughts surrounding it have evolved, and if you see the way people engage with it evolving further than how we talk about it and engage with it today.
Well, sex obviously is complicated, and you know, like in a beautiful way, Like you know, it's complex and all of us come at it from a different angle, you know. So I've managed to because you know, I knew the topic coming into this, I've distilled it down into four reasons why I think people are into being humiliated, you know, the dom sub type thing being Yeah. So, first is shame.
M So, I think shame drives a lot of sex. Actually, So what happens is, you know, like from a young age, we're all taught that, like you know, sex can be bad, Like you know, it's like, don't engage in sex. You know, it's this this can happen to you, that can happen to you. Then add on the fact that you're queer, which amplifies it by a thousand, so you're like everything
I've ever thought is wrong, you know. So when you add when those natural feelings are kind of coupled with this messaging that sex is wrong like and shameful, it kind of heightens.
Arousal for people.
So it like makes something that you're already ashamed about more shameful, which in turn makes it more exciting. So I think that like kind of leaning into that makes it more hot. The second one is giving up control. So I think that for a lot of people, it's very alluring to be in a sexual scene and be like, listen, I don't have to worry about a damn thing.
You're gonna take care of this for me.
And it's like, you know, like you might see CEOs with sex workers who are like that's their thing because they're in charge all the time and they don't want to be anymore. They want to explore that other dynamic. So I think that that's very appealing and erotic to people to be like, yeah, like do whatever you want to me. And then their third which I think might be surprising to people, but it's intimacy.
Mm hm.
So I think that being submissive is a very vulnerable experience. You know, you're giving yourself to someone entirely for a pre negotiated amount of time. So it's like I'm yours, do what you want with it. But it's like there's so much trust that comes with that. And I also say like it might not seem intimate based on the acts that might be happening at the time, but it actually is because of everything that went into it.
Yeah, it's like some of the most quote unquote dehumanizing stuff we do in sex actually requires some of the most emotional trust and emotional connection. That's I really love point number three. I'm vibing on that one yes. And number four Yeah.
Number four is I think honestly validation period. We do it because it turns the dom on like we're doing what they really want and we're their.
Fantasy, do you know what I mean? And that's hot.
Just like when you post like a first trap, you know, and it gets likes, It's like but I'm everything he wants me to be, or they want me to be she wants me to be. Right now, those what I would say, are the main four, and for me, I'm probably a complicated mix of all four.
You know what is one of the hotter stories that you have of engaging with this kink of domination and humiliation.
I'm still mending from like my broken relationship and I go on a trip to Palm Springs and I was very kind of like in my head and everything. But we go to like gay Sunday Evening bingo or whatever, and we play and there's this like hot daddy there bartending, but he's like giving out the cards and I told my friends. I was like, I'm gonna marry that man someday. Like ah, yeah, you follow it, and I'm like yeah,
yeah yeah. So later that night, me and another friend went to that bar again and he was there and he was like, Oh, I'm so glad you came. I was staring at you all day and I was like, oh, it's mutual, this is over. So he I go to the bathroom like after a few drinks and I go to close the door behind me and then his arm is in the doorway and he's like, don't close on me, and like I'm like okay, and then I opened the door.
He comes in not a word, and then he just like whips his dick out and starts pissing.
In my mouth. Was it open? Did he aped? Or were you like, oh god, it was oh no, it was open.
Yeah, it was very much like a I think, I thought oral.
And then he just fully pissed in my mouth and I was like okay, and then that happened, and then I remember like he just like truly like zipped up, like tap me on the head, and then like walked back to the bar, and I remember just like sitting there like you know, like that moment where like your heart's pumping, Like I feel like it was like a TV show thing where it's like you're so turned up, but you're like, what the hell just happened?
Never did water sports before?
Then that was it.
So he like eventually like took me home. He was great, and we had sex for like a crazy amount of time and he filmed and it was like it things I've never done before with my phone.
So I was good with It's not going.
My friend who was like also at the bar with me was like, I think I like jerked off to you guys having sex for like three times. I was like, because he heard from the other door. So I was like, what a lovely vacation experience.
Yeah, yeah, and that was last night.
It was such a climactic evening and I was like, I think I was forever changed after that moment.
Yeah.
I was like I kind of started chasing those types of things, but like, nothing ever to that degree has happened again.
Yeah, it's like chasing your first high.
Well, Bobby, I'm so sex that you got to join us today to where can folks find you online?
By Bobby Box?
So b Y Bobby Box, I would say Instagram and Twitter is where the best place is to find me for sure.
All Right, when we come back, we'll be talking with the master of humiliation, the one and only dominion Onics.
Well, now that we've heard from the submissive side, let's talk about humiliation and degradation with a dominant. Our next guest is a writer, a kinster, and a leather man.
He's written about kinks like humiliation for recon dot com and co hosts a kinky podcast called The bgkh Show on YouTube. BGKH stands for a Black, gay, kinky and human. Please welcome Dominion ONYX.
Hey, guys, how's it going today? It's going well. How are you? I am tired okay, but super excited to be I love that. Yeah, being a good doma. I'm sure it takes a lot of work.
It does its job, it really it really is. I'm a dumb in my work life and in my personal.
I don't know how you do it. We love a consistent brand.
That's yeah, dominion for people who don't know what is Onyx.
ONYX is a fraternity for gay and bisexual men of color who are into leather, kink, and fetish lifestyles.
And we have chapters all over the US.
Ten chapters so far. And I am the chair of the National Council.
Oh incredible, Okay, oh my god. We got the Damia the crown. Oh you have earned the crowd. I love that. Okay. Cool. Some people wear some people wear your caps.
I wear the crown period. I'm not a sir, I'm not a master. I am Dominion.
Oh so I love I love that, so dominion.
Our previous guest, Bobby Box, described a bit of a connection maybe between his childhood bullying experiences and his appreciation for scenes of degradation or getting pissed on or being called names. And I'm wondering if you have any connection between your youth are coming into your sexuality and your interest in this particular area of the kink world.
Well a little. So this this is not like a direct thread that you can draw. But you know, when I was a kid, you know, so my best friend he probably doesn't remember all of this, or he doesn't want.
To talk about it, but.
I guess which I remember distinctly being in his basement and making him pull his pants down so that I could spank him. And that was a thing that we did a lot of, and we were both he was nine and I was eight, so it wasn't like, you know, a sexual thing, but that was the beginning of that sort of thing. And also even when we played like schoolhouse games, I was always.
Like the person in charge.
So that sort of has been a through line in my entire personality ever since. I mean from the age of twenty two to on. You know, men have called me daddy, so you know, it's just been who I am. And so over time I grew into that personality and learned not to fight it and use it to my advantage.
I have to ask, like, as a nine year old, what what sparked this idea that, like, you know what, I just want to spank my best friend.
I don't know.
It just you know, sometimes I spend a lot I spent I do spend a lot of time thinking about these things. But then sometimes I'm just like it just is it?
Just is it?
Just it makes me happy. No one's getting hurt. He we're not even friends anymore, so he doesn't even know who dominion is. Clearly that's not what my mother named me. But you know, he doesn't know about this part of my life and he wouldn't remember that or think anything about it.
But he did it willingly. Okay, okay, so this was like anything.
Where I sort of forced him into a corner and made him pull his pants down. I did, like, take your pants off, you know, and my most forceful eight year old voice. But you know, he did it willingly of his own volition. When I'm dominating someone, I'm fine with tying people up a dooring whatever, but I'd rather just say take your clothes off. And because of the force of my personality.
My body just reacted to that.
I did that.
I clearly recalled being in Wilton Manors and we were in the whatever the name of that grilled Cheese New York Grilled Cheese and this guy was there. I was like, you should just take your pants off right here.
He was like I shouldn't. I was like, you should take your pants off right now.
And he laughed for a moment. But I don't break eye content. You know, there's it's it's it's a it's a scene that you're getting into and always it's always consensual. So if he hadn't done, and what was I going to do, like make him take his store? But it was like a little fun game that we were playing, and he was totally excited. He was getting turned on and his lips were getting red and you can see the tips of his ears getting read. So I knew that he was into it. He just need to get
into that. He was getting into it.
Yeah, yeah, I'm like thinking of myself eating my grilled cheese and watching this man take his pants.
Off exactly exactly.
And I was with all of my I was with all of my friends too, so all of my all of my brothers. They were like here he goes here, he goes here, you go yeah exactly.
So it reminds me of the witches in Dune, the Benny Jesuret who just like used the voice and everyone's like, oh my god.
Exactly, that's you. Yeah, it's a more subtle magic, it is. It is a very subtle magic.
Yes, my dominance was a natural growth of who I was, and at first it was really just sort of basic sexual things. But really getting involved with Onyx gave me the opportunity to dive deeper into who I was and to be mentored by other doms and to learn different kinds of domination. So I'm sort of a loud person. That's who I am just naturally. But I was mentored by people who were quiet when they were in the room.
They dominated the room, but they never raised their voice, and so that was something that I practiced.
Over time.
I just developed those ways. I got mentored by good people. I had some good experiences, and I also, as a domb, opened myself up to new experiences. So all of the things that I'm into now are the results of relationships that I was in and people bringing things to those relationships that hadn't previously been a part of my personality. My first true love we were in a hotel room one day at mid Atlantic leather weekend. I have a shoehorn,
a three foot long shoehorn for putting on boots. Yeah, he said you should hit me with this, and you know, hit him one time. He was like, no, you should hit me with this. It's like, yeah, he just.
Used the voice on you. He used the voice on me.
And so that's the thing I am not so wrapped up and who dominion is that I can't be mentored and taught and learn from other people, regardless of.
What side of the slash they on. I know who I am.
I know that I'm dominant, but that doesn't mean I can't accept something from other people, because all of that is variety. So I took this shoehorn and he was he's black, but he was light skinned, and so I could start to see how his skin started to change color and how he would grab me, not around the neck like this, but like hugging me, like holding on
to me, like for dear life. As I started to hit him harder and harder, and then that's when my emotional vamporism sort of kicked in and he was getting louder and I was getting louder, and so that's when my journey into sadism really.
Sort of started.
It's interesting to explore the concept of humiliation, because one person's humiliation getting pissed on is another person's day in the park. Is it humiliating to be forced to wear a butt plug and to have it come out while you're at the gym? For some people that is the height of humiliation, But for a lot of people, including my former slave, that kind of thing was not super humiliating.
It was more like a.
Marker of dominion controls me. The journey has to include you getting excited as well, because I do know some doms and it works for some subs that their only interest is their own pleasure, and the subs only interest is the doms pleasure.
That's not fun for me.
If we're really going to have a scene, I need you to be equally as satisfied as well, because otherwise I could have had a V eight. So a new thing that I am into, and again these are all things that have been brought to me by slaves or subs in my life is bondage through pantyhose.
Oh so just.
Take a pair of passes, yes, and a tight pair, so you know you're fully encased.
And then there's all sorts of things that you could do. There's nipples.
I could put a nice big plug inside of you and then just sort of gently pound on the plug. Well, you said tap, I said paund But we mean the same thing.
A very subject subjective, you know, exactly exactly, And I'm glad you realized that I saw the switch.
Oh well, okay.
You know, so that encasement bondage for some people is really fun and exciting and it's accessible. There's lots of fun and interesting things, and so what I want to do is make kink accessible to them. So it's great to have like a full dungeon full of stuff, but it's also great to say, hey, just go by by yourself a pair of pantyhose and a candle, a white candle from the bodega, and these are all things that are easily accessible to you.
I love that too, right, that there doesn't have to be a financial barrier to entering dominance and submission play. It's like you can use things that you have at homie, can use things that you can find at the bodega. And I think again, it kind of it requires tapping into the imagination a little bit, right.
It's like that's why it's a scene.
You're creating a bit of a fantasy and like you're bringing things and looking at them in a new context.
I think it's great advice.
Yeah, it's funny, but I'm into that sort of creating a scene and role playing.
But I hate role playing.
Like if you were to be like, call me daddy, and I'd be like, I guess, but I mean not you called, not not me, call you daddy.
You know what?
You knew what? Yeah?
Okay, alright, But I mean like they're just like, okay, so I'm the errant schoolboy and you're the school master, and I'm just like that requires the kind of thought that I don't want to put in. But if you were like, hey, hey, here's a box full of stuff, like we're in the kitchen, it's like, you know, build a scene with you know something in this kitchen, I'm like, okay, well, here's a rebel of Spatula and a wooden spoon and you know some crisco.
If somebody is trying to enter this particular form of kink. What tips would you give for somebody who wants to specifically enter this space as a dominant partner.
So I think you need to be open.
That's really the first thing, because you're going to have some ideas about what you want. But humiliation is often about what they want. It's an exchange, and so unlike even other forms of kink exchange, humiliation is a lot more about what they're getting out of the scene. So you need to be open to that because likely or at least partially going to be things that you might need might not even be into, So you're going to have to be willing to be open about that.
You're then going to have to figure.
Out what you're at absolute hard limits. Are you know you're not going to be into blood or whatever, then you're just not into that.
I think you're going to have to brush up on your negotiation skills. Sure, I think.
You're going to have to figure out how to say no and mean it. And I think you're going to have to figure out once you've had these sort of conversations.
What that aftercare is going to look like.
So I'm hoping that the other people that you've talked to have talked about sort of similar things. So whether you're on the dom or the subside, it's going to be about the same. It's just that on the domb side you're going to have to be more open because what is humiliating to you might not be humiliating to
the person who wants to be humiliated. So you're going to have to expand your thinking, do a lot of reading, listen to other people, see what other people think is humiliating, and then be prepared with that list of things when you're talking to whoever it is is that you're going to play with, and so then you've got like this menu of things that they want to do. So I think those are probably some some good tips to start.
I would love to know what is your favorite and most wild experience that you've had.
I mean, I feel like I am just always plateauing with a new partner because I'm always doing new stuff with the slave and with others. So and then there was this one time at Blackout for where I existed for the weekend on the other side of the slash. Now, no one here should get any idea, but those who know know that there's a reason that my other nickname and Onyx is Nadiya Kominich. My mentor said to me, you know, if you you know, don't do anything to
others that you wouldn't have done to you. So I was like, all right, great, so I'll take a turn in the sling with these toys and yeah we uh so here I am relaxing, you know, they're playing in my butt and then I.
Hear this was a raid. Shut up. I rocked forward, I rock back.
I rocked forward and into my clothes, which is how I got the name Nadiya Komaich because if I was going to jail, I was not going to jail naked.
Or with any toys in your butt. Plug came out, the pants came on. Yeah, yes, so that is wild.
But I also I think that's wonderful, right.
I think we've actually talked to a lot of doms that either used to identify some missives.
Some bottom a lot and they really.
Were like, I think understanding things from both sides of the spectrum has been really helpful.
Now that one time was enough for me, I don't sure.
Yeah, yeah, sometimes the knowledge sticks. You read the book once and you get it right exactly, you know. But sometimes we like to go back and reread. Yeah, yes you are.
Davidian.
This has been so much fun. Appreciate it and thank you so much for joining us today. I'm curious where can folks find you online or on social media.
On the theta Insta webs and the twitters and the TikTok. Everything is at domonics okay, and you can also find me every Wednesday at eight pm on The b g k H Show with Dominion and Epic YouTube dot com Slash The b gk H Show just like it sounds, black, gay, kinky and human.
Thank you so much for coming. I will be bet you will. I think you were instructed to just now.
Yeah, I have faith that I will connect with you, sir.
I love you too.
I know my my height might be uh misleading, but I don't I don't know if I'm the target audience.
Okay, friends, Yeah, this park was this episode was wild.
Yeah, like yeah, the conversations that we had for me, I could never be degraded in the bedroom. But understanding why someone would like that, I think Bobby gave us longe syst like why someone is into these things in the bedroom. You need to give me a little bit more perspective, and I don't know if I'll be changing my views on that anytime, but it is nice to know where people are coming from so that like when I hear about those things, I don't immediately like cringe, because sometimes I do.
And I think speaking to Bobby especially, I think I was skeptical of this idea that like trauma informs our sexual preferences.
Again, I was like, it's giving freud. I don't buy it.
Yeah, I'm not liking it. I'm still in my oral phase. But I really think that for some people it does kind of work that way. It can be a very healing and I don't know, therapeutic process to kind of channel some of that trauma and recontextualize it in your brain as something that turns you on. I think that's kind of like the root of a lot of kings and fetishes.
Right.
A thing that should be painful or a thing that should be traumatic is actually pleasurable when done in the right context and with and communication between partners for sure.
And that trust, right. We talked a lot about trust today and being open.
Domini was very open to dominating you, which I thought that there was a vibe, but there was a vibe. I gotta say, I really I loved him, and I think he taught me a lot about how like dom sort of view their role in relationships, because I love that he spoke a lot about how his submissive partners have actually introduced him.
And into the way that he shows up as a don totally.
This is our last episode Wild. We are on our twelfth episode Wild. I know, can you believe we did it?
Did it? I'm very excited. No, I'm really excited.
Yea.
It has been such a joy talking to all of our guests and really having this platform to talk about some really interesting topics and how having fun but also being really educational and informative.
And you know, I'm really looking forward to season two. I am too. I would love to be back.
This has been such a fun ride, and I'm I'm just really thankful that we got to do this together.
Yes, because I love you, but I'm like.
I was really blown away by the guests and topics that we managed to approach, and I think that's been the most fun part of the series, right, like really digging in and also being kind of slutty. It's the smart and slutty division. Has been evenly balanced, which is kind of my brand.
That's give it up for nerdy sluts. Come on now.
So, since this is our last episode, we've got to say goodbye to all of you, our audience, who has been so incredible. We've been reading all your comments. We've been loving the feedback. Thank you for watching, thank you for coming along for the ride, every ride. Because we've written a lot, done, written so much on this shows from episode one.
Yeah.
Now, please continue sharing the series if you liked anything you saw, and if you want to follow us on social media, you can find me on all socials using the handle gay Bones g A Y b O n e Z. It was a nickname in college and I never thought I'd have to use it professionally.
And yet here we are, and here we are, and you can find me on all socials at CPR gives you life.
CPR gives you life.
You're pretty good at puns yourself. That, Yeah, because it does. It literally does, and they do and I do. Yeah, Thanks again for watching, and we'll see you for season two next season. Gus Sniffy's Cruising Confessions is a production of the Outspoken podcast Network from iHeart Podcasts. It's directed by Adam Barron, produced by Stevie Williams and Cameron Femino,
and executive produced by Eli Martin. Cruising Confessions is presented by Snippy's, the ultimate map based cruising platform for gay by and curious people ready to cruise.
Check out the map at snippis dot com and follow Snippy's on socials at Snippy's app.
Put job good, put Joe, put Jo puts yeah H